miracris

[miracris]

What a nightmare 😂

the Gaming keys……….do t even think about looking at this post if ur not a gamer

[miracris]

Cumulatively I've spent so much time dwelling on the past. I know I shouldn't and it's mostly just a waste of time, but compared to trying to figure out the future, at least you wouldn't have to deal with the unpredictability, which can be stressful from time to time. Also my mind works in a way that it only filters out the good memories, and that's one of the best parts of it.

[miracris]

暖冬

这年冬天 是个温暖的冬天

金灿灿的暖阳 宛如你的笑靥 消融冰雪

一切都热情洋溢 在这个有你的冬天

朝阳升起 将万物鞭策

风儿是如此和煦 吹拂着松树的臂膊

枯木仿佛也充满活力 跟着风声轻和

枯草也被复活 享受着盖亚女神的抚摩

怎奈何美时美景 从未曾定格

夕阳的画笔 将这世界染成金色

黄昏之神 从不曾在冬天惜墨

霎那间 一切只剩轮廓

未央的夜 却并未令我落寞

就如曾经我们许过的承诺

虽已陨落 但至少温热过

朝阳依旧会每日升起 将大地万物重新注入生机

昼夜总要更替 光明和希冀 总是可期

就如同回忆里和你的打闹嬉戏

原来脑海里 内心里 都是你

不经意间 读取记忆的残片 好似触电

就如你的身影 突然掠过我的视线

试图压抑执念 让关于你的一切 不再浮现

突然发觉 寒冷黑夜 犹如巨兽饕餮 瞬间吞噬一切

蓦然重拾执念 一切重归温暖 仿佛时过境迁

任何风景都看不厌 在这个有你的冬天

每一秒都让人留恋 在这个有你的冬天

原来暖冬这年 因为这是个有你的冬天

Wrote this poem during a long drive lol took me around 2 hours 😂 It's good to know that I'm still able to write poems in Chinese after around 13 years (last time I wrote one was in 2010 I believe) while spending 12 years in the United States 😂

#chinese poem #original poem #现代诗 #诗歌 #诗 #杂诗 #poem written while driving #rhyme #押韵诗

[miracris]

#cringe #funny #whatthefuck

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

[miracris]

I’m just going to leave this here…

[miracris]

How we weigh an octopus!

[miracris]

Been taking some libido supplements for two days. Finally woke up from a horny dream during a nap so I guess it worked?

#emotional support #libidobooster #idk what to tag this as #lol

[miracris]

A combination of distraction removal and self-reminding, way to go! And the last sentence is sooooo true omg!

ADHD pro tip: Use psychological warfare on yourself.

For example, in order to do long tasks, like folding laundry, I put on the Mario Hat:

The main feature of the Mario hat is that my headset does not fit over it, so when The Bees™ try to put me back in front of the screen, the headset issue forces me to remember why I put the Mario hat on, and back to the task I go

As a bonus, the Mario hat is also a very clear indicator to my housemates that business is getting done, and they have learned not to distract me when I'm wearing the "goofy-ass cosplay hat"

It's not stupid if it works.

[miracris]

Yet another fake account in a dating app who talked to me for a bit in English before cussing me in my mother tongue soon after I found out that he's fake. Fuck that shit man. Dating apps are just too much for me. That shit just never stops and nobody gives a fuck. ADHD makes me more vulnerable to that shit and my day just got completely ruined.

#dating apps #personal bullshit #scammers #fake accounts #mother fucker

[miracris]

Lol

[miracris]

Fuck ADHD. The inability to focus when I want to has always been a real pain in the butt for me, but I'll keep trying and gradually become better.

I've come up with an acronym mnemonic and a few steps that seem to be helping myself getting over ADHD from time to time. However, it turns out that a lot of the times it is still very difficult for me to fully focus unless an immediate due is imminent. As a university professor, I am still struggling to get my job decently done, and this has been bothering me since people suffering from ADHD (or at least myself) gain the most motivation through the sense of accomplishment and personally I get greatly demotivated from the sense of failure and not being able to finish a job in a certain pre-specified time table. To make things worse, I am a perfectionist, yet extremely unorganized.

Nevertheless, my specific acronym mnemonic is as below:

R.S.T.T.W.

R. - Remove distractions. (Step 1)

External distractions have always been ruining my focus, almost completely. Preferably, a complete removal of distractions, or even better, a complete isolation from distractions would be very beneficial for me when I try to get things done. Personally, I am very easily distracted and I am so forgetful that a tiny distraction could ruin my focus and stuff like Facebook Reels could keep me mesmerized for hours, and that brings the second letter up.

S. - Selfly awareness. (Step 2)

Ok. First off, I am not a philosopher or a psychologist (my area of expertise is actually in natural sciences) and from what I know, terms like self-awareness and self-consciousness mean totally different thing than what I am trying to convey here. The thing here is that there are a lot of times that I am not even aware of what I am doing. For instance, I could be watching Facebook Reels or YouTube Shorts for hours before I even realize that holy shit I've been doing this shit for hours. I have wasted so much time for nothing. Most of these short videos (or other distractions in general) provide scarcely anything useful aside from the entertainment purposes. However, if I keep myself reminded about the task that I am currently focusing on; i.e., if I am aware of what myself is doing all the time without being lost in thoughts or entertainment, I would be able to identify the distraction and go back to step 1 and get rid of it before I return back to work or study. I find this to me very helpful personally.

T. - Timed study / work. (Step 3)

For people suffering from ADHD (or I could be just speaking for myself :'), it is usually crucial to keep track of time and to attempt to finish tasks in time. For an unorganized person like me, this is actually extremely difficult to achieve. This is to say that the reality is usually very different from the expectation. I expect myself to do this, this and this in the next hour, but usually what happens is that I struggle to get even one of them done. Still, keeping track of time tends to psych me up, and the limited amount of time (which is also relatable to our lives since "There is only a finite amount of time in life", quoted from one of my favorite professors during my PhD time) brings tension and the urge to get things done, which usually is good. As someone suffering from ADHD (or it could just be me), I always feel like I need more pressure and I am living my life too cozily. TBH, I have enough shit to worry about in life, and theoretically that should be keeping me busy, but I just tend to be carefree and not worry about shit. Sometimes, I worry about shit that just doesn't matter instead of focusing on the thing that I should be worrying about, and that's some next-level shit. Anyways, I feel like I got distracted again. Back to step 1?

T. - Talk to yourself. (Step 4)

This may sound silly, but a conversation between me and myself actually keeps me engaged and concentrated on what I am currently on. I feel it's like a life hack to me, like just another person that came out of nowhere trying to help me, and surprisingly (or not) that person is myself! In rare circumstances, this might turn into a self interrogation since sometime I do find myself exasperating, but hey we are this one person anyways. By talking to myself, I am able to give myself clear and detailed instructions about what's gonna happen so that it would be easier to keep track and less likely to get lost.

W. - Write it down. (Step 5)

I am actually not completely positive that this should be viewed as Step 5, since through Steps 1 - 4 we should already have been writing something. Specifically here, I am talking about writing down a plan, or just some brief schedule that resonates with Step 4. To some people, writing things down may help them better than just having a conversation with themselves. Writing things down is also particularly effective when you have a big-ass task that requires multiple steps. These tasks usually sound intimidating and can often times be overwhelming. Breaking it down into small steps helps relieve the hesitance, and a lot of times gets us started. Hey, believe it or not, sometimes our minds can be unstoppably amazing as ideas can just keep popping up and a lot of times we forget about self-appreciation. Find a mirror and look into yourself. You should be appreciating how awesome we are. It is great to be born as a human being, and we should really see this as a privilege. We are able to form much more sophisticated thoughts compared to animals and that per se is worth our appreciation.

I hope this would appear helpful to someone (or maybe it's just confusing? IDK). This is my first blog and I feel like this is cool and it kind of calms me down from the pain that I'm suffering, the self-created meaningless pain LoL. English is not my native tongue so I apologize if this is terribly written. I used to blog something in Mandarin Chinese (my native tongue) but it was a while ago (maybe junior or senior high?). I miss the feeling of writing so much, and I am glad to finally write something on this 12-year-old Tumblr account. God I am feeling so fucking old and I still do not have a kid LMAO.

#adhd #adult adhd #adhd remedy #adhd problems #adhd relatable

[miracris]

痕

回忆的残念

在下一个寒冬天

蔓延

记忆的胶片

在下一个海平面

搁浅

#诗 #诗歌 #杂诗