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(trying to convince my buddies to go to the pub) it would probably be giving mother to go to the pub right now...

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just once they should release the newspaper first and make everyone do what it says in there. instead of the other way round. of course they'll never do it due to powerful interests

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you attack me with a powerful laser beam. unfortunately for you i have already equipped my mirror shield.

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made some bumper stickers 👍

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LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY SAAB VIII. check out the story of how i got the saab car which i own. full story on substack

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bearer of a terrible secret / recipient of a wonderful gift

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(forgetting how to tell someone to turn right) just uhhh go clockwise for a bit. not too long

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that shit doesn't fit bro. it sticks out like a sword thumb. it's like a scared pig in a round hole

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what’s it like to live with the knowledge that you’ve influenced tumblr culture irreversibly

people always ask me this... it has had almost no impact on my life for better or worse. i would love to be rich as fuck but basically i just get some extra tumblr notifications

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one of my buddies just succumbed to desire. he seriously just embraced earthly pleasures... the cost was not immediately apparent but will probably become known soon

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dude hearken to me. dude

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i cant believe youre still on this site after like 10 years. how

posting is a sacred honour... we are living in a rare and tiny epoch of human history in which it is possible to make and read posts. of course i'm still here

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when you're sick you're either a prince moder or a dog moder. prince moding is when you demand many little treats, drinks etc. i personally prefer to drag myself off to a secluded corner to either die or recover, aka dog moding

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(very poorly recounting a conspiracy theory) basically the stonehenge rocks are aliens. they landed there and uhh forgot to move. that's their skeletons. same with the pyramids

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just froze my enemy in a giant block of ice... his surprised expression is so comical

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when cartoon characters look at a photo and the photo is of real life... it's like ok... that's how thin the veil between worlds is? it's that thin?

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(trying to remember harry potter's name) you know, the kid brunette. the maestro