sparkssystem

[sparkssystem]

just a reminder that BetterHelp is selling your fucking data and that they themselves have said at industry meetings that they're a data-driven company more than a people-driven company

It feels like for a while in there that people were dropping them as a sponsor but now that the controversy has slightly dimmed there are so many ads for them again; do not give them your information, do not give them your money

I know insurance is a pain in the ass and mental health treatments cost too much out of pocket for most people. So do they, that's why they're making this little bait and switch operation. Helping people is, at best, a side product of their data harvesting, and at worst just a trick to lure people in.

#rb #adding our experience of bad service #the person we were matched with got our name wrong #like they tried to lengthen our nickname for some reason in their hello message one day and got it very wrong #when we tell you we're transmasc and you say “hi Jessica” it just feels in bad taste #but also the advice we got was bad #she told one of our headmates that he NEEDED a role in the system when he explained he didn't have one #that his reason for existing was to help the system in some way and he had to figure out what that was #so he decided his role would be protector #which sounds good on paper except that he was an absolute persecutor-host thinking he was a protector for the next 2 years #but on the exit survey they made us feel so bad for leaving that we still rated the time we had there excellently and said we'd recommend i #and then we actually did recommend it for a bit because surely all of our bad experience was our fault or something #daven posts

[sparkssystem]

(*13 and under for the sake of this poll! If they're older than 13 now, they still count, this only refers to their initial age upon joining/creation.)

We don't see much talk of this in the plural community, but it's something that should be talked about more. In-system pregnancy is often talked about as a tabboo most of the times we see it mentioned, and in-system children are to some degree as well. But there's so many systems out there with children in-sys that we thought we'd make a poll about it.

#joined spontaneously #created tulpas #soulbonds #and in-sys pregnancies #we label the born-form-pregnancy kids as tulpas but i don't know if that's technically right #aero posts #rb

[sparkssystem]

A polycule across our system and the Sparks system (@sparkssystem)! Sketchy because this is our first time drawing so many people in one image and this is also pose practice.

List of who is who in the readmore.

[THIS IS A GIFT, DO NOT USE]

Please do not use our art without our permission. Feel free to ask to use for icons and similar things, but we have the right to say no.

Program: IbisPaint X Approx. Time: 6h Original Date: 02.04.24 Commission/Trade/Collab status in bio/pinned! Art Of:

Back Row:

Rift [Headmate]

Merlin [Headmate]

Shintora [Headmate, @sparkssystem]

Front Row:

Martin [Headmate]

Vince [Headmate]

Kishan [Headmate, @sparkssystem]

(System Member Artist: Merlin)

#rb #look at these gays

[sparkssystem]

the existence of endogenic systems really helps me accept being a traumagenic (and endogenic) system. i'll be picking myself apart going is this real? is this possible? does this really happen with [diagnosis]?

and then i remember endogenic systems exist and im like. who cares actually. there isn't one way to be plural and there never was. why judge ourselves based on the psych system. our experiences are real just by experiencing them.

#endogenic systems existing is what gave us words for our experiences #never would have found out about systems if we didn't stumble into the tulpa community #which i think was a nice starting point for learning about systems as a whole #even if the tulpa community can be pretty closed-off from other system experiences it was still a good place to start in back in 2017 #rb #streak posts

[sparkssystem]

Nonhumans are here, even if you do not see us. We always will be. We are often hard to spot, but can be found doing all the things a human might.

A cat went to work at an event stall for a mental health service.

A massive sea serpent wanted to go to science class because it enjoyed it more than the rest of those living in its shared form.

The void sat down, huddled up in a blanket, to watch a tv show with its partners. It had to stop watching after a bit, but enjoyed spending time with those close to it anyway.

A wolf went to a psychologist appointment and gratefully drank the hot chocolate they were offered in the waiting room.

A shapeshifting being of pure darkness spoke publicly about trans rights in front of politicians and then went to the pride festival he helped fight to keep alive.

A dragon went to school so the others sharing his human body could have a break.

A manifestation of the fear of madness itself sat in the food court at the mall eating mochi and drinking tea while waiting for its friends to get back from shopping.

A witch drew a picture of his cardinal bird and shared the work he was so proud of with his friends.

A cockatoo borrowed the next book in his favourite series from the school library and almost couldn't wait the whole day to go home and read it.

An alien went camping and watched the birds outside and the way the wind made waves and patterns on the water.

A fallen angel went shopping for sunglasses to shield his eyes from how bright the sun was.

A harpy went shopping for new plants to look after. He named a few because he loved them so much, and sent pictures to all of his friends.

An anthropomorphic hedgehog traded Pokemon cards with his peers at school. He was happy with his collection.

You may not see us, and you may feel alone, but you are not. We are just hidden. We are in more places than you'd think, and in the places you'd least expect. We are complex, we are valued, and we are here.

#Satan went to the local christmas party and had a good time speaking to his neighbors. #An anthropomorphic tenrec went to the government building to renew her ID card. #The God of Mischief had to stay in the hospital for a few days for surgery. #rb

[sparkssystem]

Endogenic Systems and Experiences in the Neurodivergent Community

We tend to stay mostly on the fringes of syscourse nowadays without directly interacting with it too often but I'm going to post this more broadly and less focused on our specific instance of this because community-wise I think it's important to talk about.

Endogenic and other non-traumagenic systems are so commonly excluded from so many neurodivergent-safe spaces where they would otherwise be able to gain knowledge about the disorders they might have, share experiences and coping strategies with peers, or at least have a sense of community that is so commonly valuable to disabled and/or neurodivergent people. In a lot of cases, even people who only support non-traumagenic systems get shoved out.

[Continued under the readmore as it's long.]

This obviously harms non-traumagenic systems, but I have to point out that when people sit there and say "we care about REAL disabled people!", I have to say.... Do you? Because if you did care about those with mental illness, physical disability or neurodivergence, you in my mind wouldn't exclude them based on something unrelated to the topic itself which might even be something as small as holding an opinion that other people get to be the judge of their own experiences. You can say that you care about "real" disabled people, but what about when a traumagenic DID system also has a tulpa that they consider just as valid and real as their alters? What about when a system labels themselves as quoigenic because in reality, you owe no one the knowledge that you are vulnerable and traumatised? What about when a system starts out as endogenic but gains so much trauma later on that they develop dissociative symptoms?

We're quoigenic because while yes we are diagnosed with DID:

DID does not have trauma in the diagnostic criteria so our diagnosis doesn't mean anything by way of origin. Nontraumagenic is not the same as nondisordered the same way that traumagenic isn't the same as disordered.

We cannot remember a time before we were plural so we cannot say with accuracy what our actual origin was.

We have headmates we consider to be from both traumagenic and endogenic origins and it feels unfair to pick one.

We don't owe anyone a quick little "hey, we have trauma!" flag on our pinned post which can easily paint us as a target. This is the exact reason we don't share our triggers online--it's not safe.

You don't owe anyone personal medical information including your diagnostic history, your trauma history or lack thereof, your current medications or how many times you've been in a hospital. That is your business and yours alone to decide who you share it with. It's downright dangerous to share some of it, especially so publically. So who is anyone online that clearly isn't your specific medical practitioner to decide whether your experiences are real enough to allow you into spaces meant for a usually completely unrelated thing? Why would someone holding the opinion that endogenic systems get to decide what labels they use be denied access to spaces just because they support people with differing beliefs and/or experiences?

If we as a system with multiple disabilities want to go into a space for people who are schizoaffective because we need others who won't immediately jump on the ableism train when discussing something we're diagnosed with that has so much stigma, should we be denied that just because we don't label our origin with a clear-cut "we are traumatized!!" label? Should we be denied access to spaces because we don't want to sit around and smile while parts of our system and other members of our community are called fake and evil and whatever else they come up with? It's so common in spaces for people with disabilities to be exclusive to traumagenic systems and people with an anti-endogenic mindset that people don't realise they're not only hurting the endogenic community, but literal chunks of their own community itself.

I can't even begin to understand the reason why.

Endogenic systems by just existing do not cause harm. They're not like a transphobe you would not be safe around by default of having a label. Not every nontraumagenic system is a saint but if you took any communtiy and called everyone in it the equivalent of an unproblematic holy angel, you'd be lying. People are bad in every community, some worse than others, but the nontraumagenic system community literally just wants to exist--and yes, sometimes a nontraumagenic system (or supporter of such) does have dissociative symptoms, or maybe they have autism, or maybe they're physically disabled. Should they be not allowed access just because of the way they chose to label their system, or their opinion of people picking their own labels for their personal identity?

What exactly is the reason they're so excluded everywhere? I'd try to assume that this level of exclusion (to the point of endos being on DNIs next to transphobes and racists) would mean there's some real harm being done on a community-wide scale, but even when looking for it there isn't any explanation we've been able to find. "They're fake" is all we seem to see which has no actual backing whatsoever. "They're harmful" is another but.. How? We might be looking in the wrong places, but we have never seen an actual explanation for how nontraumagenic systems cause harm as a community just by being themselves.

At this point, I have to wonder how many people who say "we care about real disabled people!" are just covering up their "we care about socially acceptable disabled people who I understand and/or do not find cringey" sentiment instead. Being neurodivergent should never be about fitting into tight little boxes--it's part of the whole point of having a community like this. You're not the majority, and that's okay. So why are we dividing the disabled community into boxes too?

Of course, this doesn't only apply to ND spaces. LGBT+ spaces are similar and even more divided from the concept of being a system that it makes even less sense to block nontraumagenic systems from entering the space. How does their system origin relate to their LGBT+ identity? Sometimes it can, but should a trans person be excluded from a trans space because they have a friend who is an endogenic system and they support them fully?

Overall, the main point is that it makes no sense whatsoever to be anti-endo in general, let alone so violently anti-endogenic system to the point where you hurt members of your own community due to it. Sometimes from something as simple as them supporting endogenics alone. Your safe spaces aren't actually safe if you exclude a nonharmful group who also belong in that space due to having a personal identity or opinion different to yours. If you want somewhere to be a safe, inclusive space, it should include everyone as long as letting those people in won't cause harm. People who are seeking to cause harm (racists, transphobes, etc) obviously do not belong in a safe space because they seek to harm others, thus making the space unsafe. But people who just want to be themselves without harming anyone should be included in your space if they fall under whatever it may be topic-wise. Even the "cringey" ones. Even the ones who don't quite make sense to you or have "contradicting" labels. Even the ones who use labels completely differently to the way you do. And even the ones who are uninformed or misinformed but trying their best to learn. Your safe space is not safe if it excludes those who do not follow your every single mindset and thought without any deviation.

#rb

[sparkssystem]

Autismcultureis just posted that we're all dicks for breaking their DNI of "endo systems or their supporters" to say they were horrible and wrong. If they didn't want us to interact so badly, they shouldn't have posted misinformation in an attempt to harm others with neurodivergencies. Although, they claim they're not ableist. Bit too late for a claim like that.

We're an autistic system who is beyond tired of being pushed out of communities that we should belong in because our system isn't 100% traumagenic. Why is an AUTISM blog even getting involved in another disorder's drama? Why are we banned from interacting on a cultureis blog because our DID doesn't fit into the specific box they want it to? (Before anybody says "but the DSM says", A. no it doesn't, correlation does not equal causation, and B. we do have trauma, thank you). Why does any of this matter for which community we're allowed to exist in for our other disorders???

Edit: Wow, now they're claiming that we shouldn't care what "a 14 year old girl says on the internet" and that we should "stop dragging them into drama". You started this, kid. I know at least 1 person was very nice to you and explained why you were being harmful to other autistics and you responded to them with "womp womp". If you want to be on the internet and say things like what you've been saying, you need to be ready for adults to treat you like anyone else. You're not special for being a minor, you have a platform and are spreading harmful misinformation and we ARE going to correct you. And just some advice, maybe get your medical info from medical research instead of TikTok next time.

I know this may abit out of place but what is a endogenic system?

hi, this blog is for education so no worries! an endogenic system is a fake form of a dissociative disorder that claims to be a system without experiencing trauma. (which is literally a requirement for anyone to be a system.) someone may choose to use this label if they are a system that denies their trauma, a singlet who thinks it's "fun" to be a system, or any other strange reason. it mocks and invalidates people who are actually plural, in a system, and experience these dissociations. you could probably learn a lot more about these things in your own research, but i hope this helps a little bit!

#anti endo #syscourse #ableism #rb #manic posts

[sparkssystem]

I had a coworker laugh today and say; "We can't line them up boy girl because what if one of them is non-binary or identifies as a wolf?"

This was a joke to her. A mockery of the very idea of being either of those things. She did not say this in the spirit of progression.

I had to sit there, both non-binary and non/alterhuman, realising that to this woman both of those things are linked. Not just linked, but identically ridiculous and worthy of mockery. Otherwise, why start laughing at the suggestion? Why would she and the person next to her be chuckling hard enough to go red? What was funny about the statement, other than the implied stupidity of the identities? Nobody else laughed, and the subject was quickly moved on and taken more seriously. Because yes actually, the person who brought it up had in fact at her last school stopped lining kids up boy-girl because it was pointlessly gendered and didn't always solve the 'messing about in the line' issue just because two kids of the 'same gender' were next to each other.

Anyway my point is, when people like this and many more like it already link queerness especially transness with non/alterhumanity in a negative way, I don't think we should be shy about doing it but in a positive way too. Let's reclaim this link between identities by promoting the beauty and validity of both of them.

#us being nonbinary is inherently linked to our alterhumanity #we're a system full of people of different genders and species and differing concepts of what gender even is #kind of have to be nonbinary presenting to please everybody in here #and they/them works so nice for hundreds of people masquerading as a single person #asher posts #rb

[sparkssystem]

Source Memories and Trauma

There's a lot of things that tend to come up about the source memories of alterhumans. Fictives, fictionkin, factives and anyone else with memories of another place or time are common in the community, and they can all have differing opinions on if those memories "actually happened". The thing is, some people tend to contest those memories as being entirely "made up" and dismiss any benefits or issues that might come from them, even going so far sometimes as to accuse those who have exotrauma of faking, being insensitive or ableist.

It's important to acknowledge that whether you, your system (if you have one) or any others around you believe your source memories to be spiritual in origin or psychological or anything else, they're still memories that can affect you and should be treated the same as any other memory you have of the current physical world. It doesn't matter if the memories are good or bad, spiritual or psychological, what matters is that you feel things as a result of them and that isn't something to be dismissed.

Things from your memories might not be "real" in the sense of physically happening here or even anywhere depending on your beliefs, but that does not matter because they can still very much affect you. You have these memories of things from elsewhere or another time or body and they are real to you because you remember the feeling of going through them. You remember, regardless of "true reality", those things in your memories and so, you react in apropriate ways. Maybe you had something nice happen in source so you remember things associated with that event fondly even here. Maybe you had something bad happen in source so you instinctively avoid things related to it here. Even without realising, your memories are your experiences and they can affect many things. Your experience shouldn't be downplayed just because they aren't proveable to have physically happened.

If memories need to be "real and physical" to count toward being something you should respect, what about people with psychosis? We're fortunate enough to not experience horrible hallucinations very often but we do get them and they're terrible when they want to be. Hallucinations are decidedly not real in the sense that they aren't physical, but you still live through it and deal with it. And sometimes, you can get traumatised from it. Hallucinations and delusions can be absolutely debilitating and if source memories are a psychological phenomenon too, then they really aren't all that different in how they can affect people. That's not to say that source memories can't be spiritual either--If your memories are spiritual, you literally did experience them. They are just as real to your experiences as any other, regardless of "actual" origin.

Plenty of traumagenic systems have introjects with source memories that mirror their own body's trauma but it's not always exact. Are those memories also to be dismissed because it's not the real deal? What about trauma from inside a headspace itself? For some systems, headspaces aren't as physical as the outerworld and for some, no harm can happen in them. However, there's a lot of issues that can come up in headspaces or within systems in general that are entirely abusive--is that real enough to not be shoved aside or harrassed over?

Memories are messy and the fact that source memories are so often downplayed or dismissed is upsetting. People have gotten angry at and harrassed others over experienceing exotrauma just because they simply have it. In the past, we've gotten our spaces online raided and had images posted to cringe subreddits simply because we and others described exotraumatic experiences. It's not just the subreddits of course, there's been plenty of personal experiences in the plural community itself we've had that follow the trend--and we're not alone. Every so often a post shows up talking about how people with exotrauma are ableist, lying, attention-seeking or insensitive for daring to say they have exotrauma. It's a recurring thing we see on and off and it's always as sadenning as it has been.

People who are affected by their source memories deserve to be able to find coping skills and find others who have similar experiences. You shouldn't have to wonder if you'll be taken seriously for your exotrauma. You should be allowed to take the time to heal just as anyone else would. It doesn't matter if you have exotrauma, this-world trauma or no trauma at all, everyone should be allowed to talk about their experiences and get whatever help they need for themselves. It's that simple.

#rb

[sparkssystem]

Shadow the Hedgehog is back with Classic and Modern Sonic in SONIC X SHADOW GENERATIONS, coming Autumn 2024!

#rb #you do not understand how hyped i am #i don't think ive ever been this excited for anything in my life #waiting until autumn is going to be torture #sega why would you do this to me #nova posts

[sparkssystem]

Are you part of a DID/OSDD/DDNOS system, and do you have a Chara Undertale fictive?

I am and we have a Chara fictive

I am but we do not have a Chara fictive

Not a system/see results

#oh #oh no we were the first yes vote #where are all the other Charas at? #help

[sparkssystem]

ALTERBEING RESOURCE of the day:

#rb

[sparkssystem]

This isn't at anyone in particular, but it's very disheartening to see that the otherhearted AND otherkith tags are full of.... Posts that are almost completely unrelated to those experiences. Otherlink tags are much the same.

A few in there are geared toward all alterhumans in general, that's fine, but... Posts specifically only about therians, otherkin or fully nonhuman identities without so much as a mention of heartedness don't belong in the otherhearted tags. Therian/otherkin specific posts don't belong in the otherlinking tags either. It's so hard to find anything related to being otherhearted or otherlinking because it's almost all content that only explicitly relates to therians or otherkin. It really looks like they sometimes just slap the smaller tags on there for reach.

It doesn't get your therian posts reach though, because as far as I'm aware, hearted people and otherlinkers follow the tags for posts relating to those specific experiences. Sure, people can be more than one thing and there are definitely therians and otherkin following those tags, that's fine, but it's not why those people follow them. Flooding the hearted and otherlink tags with otherkin posts really only makes it impossible to see anything from other individuals who are otherhearted or otherlinkers. The people who want to see your posts will be following the otherkin or therian tags.

You don't need to tag in different community tags for reach, this is tumblr where tags do actually matter because they're the primary way of finding posts. There's no algorithm at all if you don't use the "for you" page. And when you're putting therian and otherkin only posts in tags that are for much, much smaller communities like otherhearted people and otherlinkers.... It becomes impossible to keep those communities present here.

I don't know if there's separate tags that otherhearted people and otherlinkers use that aren't flodded with otherkin-only posts but if there is I haven't been able to find it because the only post we can even find recently in the hearted tags thats actually about heartedness is one we made today.

We've went on about how the term "alterhuman" isn't just for otherkin content before. We're sad the tag for it has less variety than the community really encompasses. Yes, otherkin are alterhuman and have the right to post there--no one is saying they don't--but a lot of the times people post "alterhumanity is about being an animal and no one knows" or something when it's definitely not always the case. Alterhuman isn't the same as nonhuman. I want to see more diversity and acknowledgement that there can be other alterhuman identities aside from identifying as an animal. As an umbrella term, alterhuman encompasses a lot more than nonhumanity and I don't like that even the hearted tags are covered in unrelated material.

I really think that non-kin and human+ or just plainly still human identities that fall under the alterhuman umbrella need to be acknowledged and respected enough to not be flodded out of their own tags.

#rb

[sparkssystem]

Terrorpunk: Embracing the Horror Within.

For all those with identities that put others on edge. People with parts of them commonly used as horror tropes, people who act "unnatural" and put others off, people with stigmatized "scary" disorders and disabilities, people who have horror and fear intertwined with alterhuman identities, queer identities or anything else that people generally find off-putting or downright terrifying--but in spite of that, don't see any of it as a bad thing, and reclaim the horror that others see in you. This is for you--for the monsters and the freaks and the eldritch abominations.

This is about reclaiming the stigma placed upon you. Maybe you are scary to them, but maybe you don't care so much about how they react? Maybe you keep being your authentic fear-inducing self out of spite. Maybe you like being a little scary because it's become intrinsic to who you are. Being open about yourself and unapologetically doing so shouldn't be a fear inflicting thing, but if it's going to be that way, you're not going to change for them. You're you, let them be scared. It's not on you to become palatable. It's not on you to hide parts of yourself away. Maybe it's on them to not see anything unknown or new as terrifying. You see the horror within yourself as nothing bad, and you openly embrace who you are and who others with differing experiences from "the norm" are too.

You don't need to be anything in particular to use the label, this isn't a term to be gatekept. Terrorpunk is reclaiming the terror that others or even yourself might think of about any part of you. That's what it's about, being unapologetically you and scary by doing so, because if people see you as someone that fills them with terror, then maybe that's fine by you. You won't change for them.

Keep in mind that this is not a term to use to cause or justify harm, exclude others or further any stigma. No one by any means has to reclaim being feared, or being something that scares people. There's some of us that find power in it though, to take the stones they throw, pick them up and ask them what they have left to throw at us.

Those who exclude others on the basis of identity (transphobes, homophobes, TERFs, ableists, racists, anti-alterhumans, aphobes and anyone else who excludes those who act on good faith) aren't included under this term. Terrorpunk isn't a basis for your hate or actions to harm marginalised groups or anyone similar. It's not an excuse to harm people in general. It's simply about being you, and if being that is scary, then so be it.

#rb #this is half of my system #maybe me too? #we'll see how i feel about it in an hour #shintora posts

[sparkssystem]

But found a new home.

Please do not use our art without our permission. Feel free to ask to use for icons and similar things, but we have the right to say no.

Program: Firealpaca Approx. Time: 5h Original Date: 05.12.23 (Crowley)

#rb

[sparkssystem]

Born in the wrong nest.

Please do not use our art without our permission. Feel free to ask to use for icons and similar things, but we have the right to say no.

Program: Firealpaca Approx. Time: 5h Original Date: 04.12.23 (Crowley)

#rb #kin assigning Crowley as Loki based on this post #sorry #except I'm not #Loki posts

[sparkssystem]

I don't often speak about my semi-verbality, but I'm going to say this as a bodily semi-verbal system, since I've seen it misunderstood by well-meaning folks out there: yes, individual headmates can be semi-verbal or non-verbal.

[PT: yes, individual headmates can be semi-verbal or non-verbal. / end PT]

There's no good reason why they can't, and the reasons I do see tend to dehumanize or delegitimize headmates and systems as a whole. "They have different experiences –" so do any two people who share the same condition. "They can just switch –" not all of them can, and switching doesn't change their own inability to speak or difficulty with speaking, which is what these terms are describing. "You can just make new words –" what, you want us to coin niche words that won't do their job of properly communicating a headmate's disability due to being unknown, when there's perfectly acceptable words already in use you're gatekeeping for no good reason? "It gives people the wrong impression –" how so? No, really, tell me how individual headmates using these words to describe themselves somehow makes people misunderstand semi-verbality and non-verbality as a whole. How are we, a tiny subset of these communities that practically no one offline knows about, somehow "ruining" or "misrepresenting" our own disabilities. I'd really like to know.

There's no good reason for all this gatekeeping regular health vocabulary from headmates/systems, and I wish people saw it as the pluralphobic nonsense it is. In fact, this goes for other health vocabulary too, like d/Deaf, hard of hearing, visually impaired, etc (and yes, we're saying this as a system with bodily impairments in both hearing and vision). Why the fuck do systems have to give up words that accurately describe them just because they're systems? What, are we ~too complicated~ or ~too weird~ to accept? You can't be bothered to actually accept that people being many-in-one means they have – *dramatic gasp* – many unique selves with their own lived experiences and disabilities? You think having a disability that affects all of your self/ves makes you automatically better or more important than systems who don't? Demanding people stop doing something that helps them and doesn't hurt others for being part of a certain minority is – and this may shock you – shitty ol' bigotry. I won't stand for it any fucking longer.

#rb