strawberrymilkmothman

[strawberrymilkmothman]

i need you like water

#lovecore #pink #heartsick #lovesick

[strawberrymilkmothman]

#lovecore #pink

[strawberrymilkmothman]

Pretty Please

#lovecore #soft pink #heartsick #lovesick

[strawberrymilkmothman]

no thoughts, just heart mugs 💕

[strawberrymilkmothman]

Warm Rain, Your Ghost

Warm rain dripping down my fingertips feels like the ghost of a touch. Like a phantom hand is caressing my spectral own. Like the rain itself is trying to grasp my fingers in desperation, as if I could keep it from flowing into the gutter. I keep looking down and expecting to see you there- your thin fingers replacing the droplets.

Thin but strong, holding me tight so you don’t slip into your gutter and disappear. When you grip me like that, shaking and crying and as red-faced and miserable as the day you were born, I know that I will never let you go.

 I crowed about the warm rain and how I loved it so. The girl sitting next to me said I was crazy, and that the water was cold and depressing and turned her away. You never turn me away. You grow up, and you’re told to smile more and touch more and speak more- or people will talk. They’ll say something’s wrong with you. They’ll say you’re cold. 

How stupid are they, when you’re the sun and the rain and the world all at once. You’ve never been cold, and I’ve basked in your warmth since the day I got to hold you, a star just born, so little in my arms and so beautiful I didn’t know how the world was still spinning. I don’t remember well, but I like to think it was raining when you looked at me for the first time. Raining, when you reached for me and held my pinky in your fist. Raining, when I realized I would move heaven and earth- that I would kill, die, cheat, and lie- just to see you smile. The skies were dry when I had to leave.

Now, when all I have of you is your tiny, tinny voice coming through my phone, the rain is more than rain. It’s a gift, it’s a blessing, and it’s you. My brother, my warm rain.

#poetry #prose #brother #family

[strawberrymilkmothman]

Checkmate, dearest

#edwardian era #valentine #romantic

[strawberrymilkmothman]

To the Inner Child

Dear H, 

I’ve been thinking about you. 

I owe you an apology, I think

I need to apologize for hating you.

Evicting you from my heart and mind and hating your weakness.

You were a child. You had no choice but to be weak.

And I hated you for it. I let you rot.

I left you to rot, I abandoned you. Left you.

Anything I could do to hide from weakness.

But I am weak, and it’s too late for a reconciliation. 

I can’t hope to repair our broken bones, cracked from tearing you away from me. 

I love you. I didn’t say that enough when you were still me. 

When we were still us. 

And now you’re gone and I didn’t say goodbye. 

I want to see you.

I want to protect you but when I reach out to shield you you flicker away from me like candlelight. 

If I wasn’t too much of a coward to say your name I would build you a shrine. 

Let your candlelight flicker and grow as I keep vigil over your dreams. What you want for me.

What you want our future to be. 

Our future is different now.

My future. 

I wish you were in it.

I miss you. You haunt me. I love you.

Sincerely, A

#poetry #prose #inner child

[strawberrymilkmothman]

The 12 zodiacs in Vietnamese traditional clothes. Credit to Elle Vietnam & Kris Nguyen.

#zodiac #vietnamese fashion #traditional clothing