head in my hands (<- she is thinking about the dreamcatcher dystopia and apocalypse trilogies)
with dystopia it's like. (scream) the world is so full of hatred and vitriol and every time i am reminded of it, it seeps further and further into my veins and i'm worried it may consume me. the witch hunts are constant and ever worsening, and all that ever comes from them is more contempt and more regret. what is this poisonous masquerade all for. does anyone else hear this, i'm calling out to you, i'm begging for relief and for catharsis. i need this to reach you, i need you to hear the cries of the people who are suffering. i'm shouting alongside them. (boca) do you speak to your mother with that mouth. would she be proud of the things that you're saying. look around you - the angels are dying and the casualties grow with every spiteful word. sometimes kindness starts with silence when all you want is to fight fire with fire. my heart is pierced for you again and again, and i don't know how much longer it can be like this. i want to help you, i want to let you breathe again and give you relief from the harsh words that have strangled your lungs. i want to make this world better, and i want it to start with us. (odd eye) the world is broken, this is not a fairytale. utopia has never existed and it never will. do not believe the sugarcoated lie of perfection because it is impossible to grasp. the world is dark and you will not find what you're looking for if eternal peace is what you seek. open your eyes to reality, and you will make it a better place - not by dreaming, but by doing what you can.
and then with apocalypse it's like. (maison) our home is dying, our planet is dying, our people are dying, but i feel so detached from it all. i need to come down to earth, i need to keep pushing for change in every way that matters. your conscience is drying faster than the droughts plaguing our land, don't you see that we need to do something about this. please someone fight for us - the task is enormous and the stakes are daunting, and i'm coming down to rescue you but i can't do it alone. you have to help save yourself. (vision) the world is a scorched-earth battlefield and we are its foot-soldiers. we must press on and fight now that we've come this far. everything is painted in shades of moral gray, but we must act decisively. i am reaching for your hand in the trenches, i am sending a message to you, i am giving you a vision. do you copy, have you clasped my soot-stained hand. the work is hard, but we must reload and keep going. join us and fight alongside us. i am not asking, i am not begging - there is no time for either. ([reason] i am with you always, in war and peace, in hatred and in love. you are why i fight. i have spent years being beaten down, and you have, too, but it is your companionship that buoys me, brightens my darkness, makes this world worth it all. you are my reason. don't let me stop fighting.) (bon voyage) we have fought the good fight together, my friend. the war wages onward, but our assignments have changed, and we must part ways. i will carry every lesson you have taught me within me. the battlefield lies fallow until the footprints recede. the flowers are starting to bloom again and the colors are coming into focus. a part of me will always be drawn to you even as i leave you, even when you are long gone. travel well, my friend. may our battles not be in vain and may we both find rest. i hope i will see your face in peacetime.
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Rated: T
Pairing: Beidou/Ningguang
Word count: 1.3k
Summary:
Yet for as inhuman, as undefinable it was, the god… it followed Beidou. From a distance, usually, but for as long as Ningguang’s known her, the pirate was blind to its presence.
So was everyone else, really.
But it knew that Ningguang could see it, and it mocked her so— draped across Beidou with its too many teeth, luminescent eyes and the whisper-song of the sea's allure.
Or:
There was a wild, eldritch god that only Ningguang could see, and it follows Beidou like a spectre. Ningguang does not approve.
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I picked up a volume of the mha manga at the con and it ended up being the Kamino Ward arc, or more the tail end of it but reliving it in manga form and seeing all the pro heroes/teachers being like "uhh maybe we've been hoisting all our problems onto All Might" and getting SO MAD ALL OVER AGAIN 😂😂
My s/i is in the corner being held back by someone thrashing and biting like "I'VE BEEN FUCKING TELLING YOU ALL THAT FOR YEARS" she's ready to start SWINGING at whoever is closest these hands are rated E for Everyone 😤😤😤
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tfw you try to figure out why you feel like shit and your options start to look more and more like a really long list
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Oh and in other hoyonews.... why does she look like dark!Amayui's lovechild????
I want her.
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CHAPTER 6 - page 13/?
original word count: 3602
revised word count: 1841
click for ch 6's full comparison document.
original:
begged again, trying my best to sound pathetic and sad and pitiful, she stormed out. I hadn’t worn a dress in years. I wasn’t about to start, not when escape was my main priority. I wouldn’t be able to move freely in a gown.
Bundled in my robe, I sat for minute after minute, the chattering of small birds in the garden beyond the windows the only sounds. No screaming, no clashing weapons, no hint of any slaughter or torture.
The bedroom was larger than our entire cottage. Its walls were pale green, delicately sketched with patterns of gold, and the moldings were golden as well. I might have thought it tacky had the ivory furniture and rugs not complemented it so well. The gigantic bed was of a similar color scheme, and the curtains that hung from the towering headboard drifted in the faint breeze from the open windows. My dressing gown was of the finest silk, edged with lace—simple and exquisite enough that I ran a finger along the lapels.
The few stories I’d heard had been wrong—or five hundred years of separation had muddled them. Yes, I was still prey, still born weak and useless compared to them, but this place was…peaceful. Calm. Unless that was an illusion, too, and the loophole in the Treaty was a lie—a trick to set me at ease before they destroyed me. The High Fae liked to play with their food.
revised:
Alis left, and after a few minutes, she returned with a bundle of clothing in her hands. She lifted a sodden grayish shirt full of holes. “It fell apart the moment the laundress put it in water. Here’s what’s left of your pants.” She held up a few scraps of brown. “Now will you wear the dress?”
I slumped. Alis sighed, left again, and returned with trousers and a tunic. I donned a white undershirt then buttoned the dark blue tunic over top.
She herded me into a low-backed chair and ran a comb through my hair. “You’re skin and bones.”
“Winter does that to mortals.”
Her smile was without warmth. “A word of advice. Keep your mouth shut and ears open. It’ll do you more good than a loose tongue.”
With nimble fingers, she wove my hair into a braid. “If you ask me, Andras was a good sentinel, but he knew the danger of crossing the wall. And the others understand the Treaty. So keep your head down, and none of them will bother you.”
It was good advice. Maybe even kinder than I deserved. When I looked in the mirror, I saw her efforts had left my hair in a plait that started at my crown and fell over my right shoulder.
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the thing they dont warn you about when it comes to living in a hostile dv adjacent situation is the way that just the sound of the other person existing in your general proximity makes you feel like both a violent feral dog and a neurotic prey animal at the same time
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