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jenanigans1207 · 3 years

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Castle of Cards [Renga]

I said I wasn’t gonna post this on here because formatting on Tumblr is so obnoxious now, but I figure I might as well. So here’s my fix-it fic to ep 9 (so, spoilers!) where Langa and Reki finally talk it out and Reki gets the gd hug he deserves!

-- x

Everyone is looking at him.

They’re looking and pointing, whispering words behind their hands. Some are even outright shouting congratulations to him, though he barely hears it. He may respond absently, he’s not honestly sure. His brain is too occupied with one thing and one thing only, leaving no space for any of this. Compared to what he’s dealing with currently, his win against Joe barely even exists in his mind right now— it’s certainly not something he would call important currently. The words Adam, Snow, and Eve follow him around, rippling in his wake as he makes his way through the crowd. The voices all blend together, background noise to him at most.

None of them are the voice he’s looking for, the voice he needs to hear.

None of them are Reki.

“Excuse me.” Langa’s at the gate now, and he’s not really sure why. But he’s looked everywhere else and he hasn’t been able to locate Reki, so he’s running out of options and feeling a little more desperate with each passing second, with each face he sees that still isn’t Reki’s.

“Oh, Snow.” The guard glances up at him, surprised. “That was an amazing race.”

“Thanks.” Langa says absentmindedly. He glances around one more time, but no faces jump out at him. “Have you seen a red headed guy? About my age?”

“Oh, yeah.” The guard nods, his gaze far away as if he’s remembering. “He left a little while ago.”

“Left?” Langa echoes, hollow inside. He can feel his heart pounding against his ribs like drums, can feel the way he’s only a few beats away from having his ribs crack open entirely, bleeding all of these emotions out for the world to see. “Is he coming back?”

“Well, considering the fact that he gave me this,” The guard digs around in his pocket for a moment before holding his hand out between them, an S pin catching the light in his palm. “I’m going to say no.”

For a moment, everything stops. It’s just Langa and the pin, staring at each other while Langa tries to make sense of what he’s seeing. Cold dread seeps into his veins, spreading to the tips of his fingers and toes. The pin glistens in the light, bright and beautiful, just like it had so many times when it had been attached to Reki’s collar. It had caught Langa’s eye so many times, been the thing he chose to stare at when he couldn’t stare directly at Reki any longer for fear of something stupid coming out of his mouth. He knew that pin almost as well as he knew Reki.

But no, it must’ve been some other red headed guy.

The pin must belong to someone else. There’s no way it’s Reki’s pin.

It was true that Reki and Langa weren’t on the best terms, but Reki would never give up his pass to S. Just the mere thought of it sits wrong in Langa’s chest, makes him feel a little sideways. He almost wants to laugh bitterly at himself for even considering it. He knows that Reki would never. If there was one fundamental thing about Reki that could never change, it was his love for all things skating— and that certainly included S. Langa remembers the first time Reki had told him about S, the way his whole face had lit up. He can still feel Reki’s hand on his shoulder as he’d shook Langa, insisting that Langa should be more excited for such an honor.

Reki would give up breathing before he would give up S. Langa was sure of it.

“Oh.” He finally says dumbly. “That must be someone else.”

“No,” The guard shakes his head, seemingly unaware of the turmoil slowly starting to stir in Langa’s stomach, unaware of the ice in his heart, chilling him to the bone. “It was definitely that guy you usually show up with. Took me a minute to recognize him without that headband, but it was definitely him.”

It feels like the entire world is ripped out from underneath Langa’s feet.

Suddenly he’s free falling, plummeting towards some dark future that he wants nothing to do with and there doesn’t seem to be a way to slow it down. Suddenly he’s a million miles from Reki, on the other side of a divide he had unknowingly dug. Everything he knew seemed to be flipped on its head, the chilling realization that he didn’t know Reki as well as he thought— that he had hurt Reki far deeper than he’d realized— was freezing him to his spot. Everything he believed in, everything he held close to his heart, every touch, glance, smile— all of it, stripped away from him.

Langa stares at the pin like it might tell him that this is some practical joke, that Reki is just trying to teach him a lesson. Dear God, he’ll learn the lesson. He’ll do anything if it gets Reki to come back.

Because Reki had been here. He’d been here, despite the fact that he’d been avoiding Langa and insisting that he didn’t want anything to do with this tournament. He’d been here and he’d cheered Langa on, because he was Reki and that meant he was incapable of not being there for the people that mattered to him. Even lost in thought as he’d been, Langa had recognized Reki’s voice instantly. He’d always recognize Reki’s voice— he’d recognize anything about Reki. His voice, his laugh, his footfalls, even the sound of his ragged breathing after an afternoon practicing a new trick— Langa was in tune with all things Reki.

Or, he had thought that he was. He’d thought that he knew Reki better than anyone else but suddenly he’s staring down at Reki’s most prized possession, Reki nowhere to be found, feeling his heart crack open in his chest. Somewhere things went wrong, they got off track and suddenly fell out of step with each other. All this time, Langa had been looking to Reki to lead him, to show him what was next, to step into another adventure at his side. All this time it had been them . But now it was just him . And even though he was in the center of a crowd that kept repeating his name, Langa had never felt more alone.

“Can I take that?” Langa asks after a silence that has stretched so long it has become awkward. “He’s just having a bad day. He’ll want it back when he’s feeling better.”

The words don’t sound quite right and they taste a little bitter on his tongue, as if the words themselves know that they’re a lie, but Langa ignores that. He wills it to be the truth, to give him some hope to cling to. He needs that right now. Because if he doesn’t at least have hope that he’ll be able to get Reki back, he has absolutely nothing . Not even the board Reki made him, not anymore.

The guard shrugs and deposits the pin in Langa’s hand. It’s cold to the touch but still something inside of him burns. “Technically I should say no, but I’ve seen him around here for years. I know he’s a good kid. So, go for it.”

Someone arrives at the gate then and the guard bids Langa farewell, unaware of just how much his words sting. He’s seen Reki around here for years— yeah, that sounds like Reki. The Reki that Langa knows, the Reki he had been thinking about at dinner with his mom a few days ago when he first mentioned that Reki was avoiding him. That sounded like the Reki that shined brighter than the sun and dragged Langa out of the dark hole that his life had become.

Because Langa had moved here with nothing but his mom. He’d lost his dad, he’d given up snowboarding and then lost the possibility of picking it back up. He’d moved here without knowing a single soul outside of his family and he’d assumed that his life would just remain bleak and boring for— well, indefinitely, really. And then Reki had come dashing down the street, arm bandaged, yelling for Langa to catch his board before it got away and everything had changed. Langa’s fingers had closed around the board, he’d turned to meet Reki’s gaze and the entire trajectory of his future had shifted in that exact moment. He was completely sure of it— that was the moment that everything in his life had changed. That was the moment he found a purpose again. And more than that, he’d found someone to share it with.

Langa shoves the pin deep in his pocket because he can’t bear to look at it any longer. It’s bad enough that he has to carry around the splintered halves of his skateboard, he didn’t need another reminder staring back at him.

Something was happening in the distance, Langa didn’t really know what, he wasn’t paying attention. All he knew was that the crowd seemed to have finally moved on from talking about him and he was grateful for the peace because right now he wanted to be with Reki. And if he couldn’t be with Reki, he wanted to be alone.

-- x

He’s careless as he rips the posters off of his wall, tearing them irreparably down the middle.

Not that it matters.

Not that anything matters.

Reki doesn’t turn his bedroom light on as he shreds the posters in his hands, throwing crumpled bits of them on the ground. What’s the point in having his room decorated in skating memorabilia if he wasn’t going to be skating anymore? Because that was really the only option that he could see, that’s what today had made clear to him.

He didn’t want to be standing in the crowd, watching Langa reach new heights. He didn’t want to see Langa’s back . He wanted to be by Langa’s side, in the center of his circle. He wanted to be in Langa’s heart . But Langa was out of reach now— too high in the sky, surrounded by too many adoring fans, up on a pedestal that Reki could never climb, no matter how hard he tried. He wanted to skate, but he wanted to skate with Langa. And since that goal was officially unreachable, well, he didn’t see the point in skating at all.

What fun was there left in it when he would always have an empty place by his side? Where was he supposed to find the joy when he didn’t have Langa there to cheer him on, to clap him on the shoulder or high five him in congratulation when Reki finally landed a trick he’d been practicing? What enjoyment was left for him if he was just going to be eating lunch alone in the middle of the day, a million thoughts on his mind and nobody to share them with?

Because the truth that he’d been trying to avoid for the last few weeks was that he absolutely couldn’t find someone else to share this with. Not the way he shared it with Langa, anyways. There was never going to be someone else that he had that connection with, someone else who walked into his life and just stayed like it was the only place they could possibly imagine being. He hadn’t known it when Langa had introduced himself to their class that first day, but Langa was a missing piece to Reki’s heart, something to complete him and make him feel whole again. Langa challenged him and took him to new heights and for the longest time, Reki had thought that Langa would wait for him, that he wouldn’t try to hit a new level until Reki met him on the one he was at.

Because for a while, it had been okay that Langa was naturally talented and unbelievably amazing because he stayed in stride with Reki. It had been okay that Langa could fly higher than Reki, because it gave Reki something to strive for, a goal to reach. And the whole time, Langa stayed there, encouraging him and cheering him on, laughing with him and offering a hand to hoist him up from the ground when he fell. It was okay that Langa was ahead because he was still there — bright and beautiful, always within Reki’s reach.

He wasn’t within Reki’s reach anymore.

But there was something about Langa, something about the way he fit perfectly into the cracks of Reki’s heart that made Reki absolutely certain that he couldn’t share his passion with anyone else the same way. He’d always have a hollow spot throbbing in his heart whenever he touched a skateboard. That was the real reason he hadn’t skated since their fight. Every time he touched his board, he just felt the ache of loneliness that came with Langa’s absence. Somewhere along the way skating had stopped being his thing and instead had become their thing. But since there was no longer a them , Reki didn’t feel like he could find a home inside skating again.

And that hurt more than Reki had thought anything could.

In the matter of a few weeks he had lost his best friend and his passion, and they weren’t even stolen from him. Langa had willingly walked away, had known that he was breaking his promise to Reki and had chosen to go along with it anyways. Langa had given up on Reki and now Reki was left with no choice but to give up on skating. Because the idea of giving up on Langa hurt even worse, somehow, and a small piece of his shattered heart harbored hope that Langa would come back.

Reki sinks down to the floor, curling in on himself and pressing his forehead against the wall, torn skating posters grasped loosely in his palms.

All this time he had felt like he and Langa were creating a castle together, a place to rule over their shared passion. But now that Reki was alone— well and truly alone, not even the presence of his S badge to keep him company— he realized that it was nothing more than a Castle of Cards and it was collapsing around him.

-- x

The problem with doing the right thing is that right now, Langa doesn’t know what the right thing is.

He had been trying to give Reki the space he seemed like he wanted the last few weeks, trying to stay within Reki’s orbit without forcing Reki to interact with him if he didn’t want. But that hadn’t worked because suddenly Reki seemed even further away than he had before. But if Reki really didn’t want to talk to him— and that certainly seemed to be the case— Langa didn’t want to corner him.

He looks down at the broken board in his hands and thinks that it’s the perfect representation of everything Reki in his life right now— shattered completely and something Langa has no idea how to handle.

Words have never been his forte. And it’s true that Reki is usually able to read between the lines or connect the dots to Langa’s point if he mixes some of his thoughts together, but this isn’t the kind of thing he wants Reki to have to parse. This is something he needs to say to Reki, clearly and succinctly because anything else risks him losing Reki forever.

And if he loses Reki forever— he loses skating forever, too. Because he can’t skate without Reki there, cheering him on. He doesn’t find joy in it unless he has Reki, that much has become abundantly clear in his last few trips to S.

That, he knows, is the whole problem. It took him too long to realize that the thing he was chasing had in fact been next to him the entire time. It took him too long to realize that the feeling he was addicted to wasn’t the feeling of going fast, but instead the feeling of Reki’s belief in him, the warmth of Reki’s friendship and unwavering support. The thing he had gotten so lost in was Reki, not skateboarding, and he didn’t make that connection until it was too late.

And Reki— Reki was really good at keeping a straight face, at pretending he was okay when he wasn’t. Because Langa had been blind sided by Reki walking out of his life. He’d had maybe one hint that Reki wasn’t feeling himself and then suddenly the bridge between them was on fire and Langa didn’t have any water with him. He’d been forced to stand there as it charred to bits and now— now he had to find some other way across that gap. Because now he knew that it was Reki he needed, Reki he wanted. He knew it was Reki that meant more to him than anything else in his life ever had and he wasn’t going to let Reki go.

Slowly, and with far more effort than it should actually take, Langa peels himself off the ground. S had ended hours ago and everyone had scattered, but Langa hadn’t felt like going home. The sun was starting to rise over the horizon, just the tiniest hints of pink and yellow starting to paint the inky black sky. Another day dawning— another day without Reki if Langa didn’t do something. Another day of the thing he wants most slipping through his fingers.

With equal amounts of determination and fear, Langa takes off towards Reki’s house. He has no idea what he’s going to say, no idea what he’s going to do , but he can’t just sit around and do nothing anymore. He grips Reki’s S pin in one hand, clutching his broken board to his side with the other as he treads the familiar path to Reki’s house. He could walk there with his eyes closed if he wanted to, he’d been here so many times. It was like his feet knew the path on their own, like even lacking courage couldn’t stop him from going there because every fiber of who he was longed to see Reki, to be near him again. Every single cell in his body was screaming at him to get to Reki before it was too late and Reki was gone completely.

He rounded the last corner and came to a complete stop as he stumbled into Reki’s front yard, surprised to see Reki sitting on the front porch so early in the morning.

“Reki?”

Reki’s head whips up and he squints at Langa, the sun from behind Langa no doubt blinding him. “Langa? What are you doing?”

A lot of different thoughts swirl in Langa’s mind, the weight of both the pin and the board heavy in his hands as he tries to figure out where to start. Reki stares at him, still in the same hoodie he’d worn at S, his headband gone. His hair was longer than Langa had realized as it fell down around his face, framing his eyes and the unbearably sad expression on his face. He looked the way Langa’s heart feels— empty and void of any passion. The first thing Langa considers is just dropping everything and pulling Reki into a hug, but he’s not sure Reki would receive that willingly and he really doesn’t think he’d be able to handle Reki pushing him away.

“I—“ Langa glances down at his feet, at the board in his hand, the scrapes along his arms from when the board had broken and he’d fallen. If only this was as easy as a simple cut, if only this would heal with just a little time and tending to.

“What happened?” Reki asks and when Langa glances up at him, he sees Reki’s gaze focused on his board. There’s a sharp downturn at the corner of his mouth and Langa can’t tell if Reki is mad that he broke the board or not.

“Oh, it—“ Langa glances at the board, too. The board that Reki had made for him, the one that Reki had poured time and effort into. The board that allowed him to reach the heights he can now reach. “It snapped right after I crossed the finish line with Joe. I’m sorry, Reki, I didn’t mean to—“

Reki sighs and it sounds like he’s pulling the weight of it from the very depths of his bones. Langa worries for a moment that he’s going to collapse in on himself when he exhales because it sounds like he’s letting go of everything he is. “You need me to fix it for you?”

That startles Langa. Sure, when his board had first broken and Joe had suggested that he go back to Reki to fix it, Langa had assumed that Reki would. But something about finding out Reki had turned in his S pin had changed everything. If Langa’d had to guess before he got here how he thought Reki would react, he would’ve said that Reki would’ve staunchly refused to fix his board for him and shown him the door. It didn’t sound anything like Reki but then again, neither did giving up S and Reki had apparently done that.

“You would?”

Reki raises one shoulder in what Langa assumes is meant to be a shrug. “You can’t beat Adam otherwise.”

Each word is a knife straight to Langa’s heart and somehow, completely despite himself, he drops the board to the ground at his feet, his arm going limp. “Reki…”

Finally, Reki stands up from the porch and closes the distance between them. And even though he’s technically getting closer with every step he takes, Langa feels like Reki is being pulled further and further away from him. “That’s what you want, isn’t it? To beat Adam? You’ll need a board to do that.”

Slowly, and with far more care than it deserves, Reki picks the shattered pieces of the board up off of the ground. He stands up, just a few feet away from Langa, close enough that Langa could reach out and touch him if he wanted to— and Langa wants to. God he’s not sure he’s ever wanted something more in his life. He wants to touch Reki, to feel that Reki is really there, that Reki is real and beside him again, right where he belongs.

Because all along, it’s been Reki reaching out to Langa. It’s been Reki throwing his arm around Langa’s shoulders, pulling Langa close in celebration. It’s been Reki holding onto Langa, holding Langa together, dragging Langa forward. And then— and then the one time he’d reached for Reki first, Reki had shaken off his touch and left him standing under a street lamp in the rain.

And Langa really wants to reach for Reki, but he’s paralyzed by fear that Reki will shake him off again.

Pain courses through his body with every beat of his heart and suddenly Langa feels like he’s losing control. The unbearable agony of being this close to Reki and not being able to have him, to hold him, breaks Langa apart completely. “Why did you turn in your badge?”

Reki hears him, Langa knows he does. Because Reki has always heard him, has always been listening for him in the midst of everything. There’s never been anything that Langa has said that Reki hasn’t heard. But Reki ignores him. “I’m probably going to have to start from scratch.” He says instead, his gaze studiously focused on the board. But Langa sees the tight line of his jaw. “I don’t think I can repair this.”

“Reki—“

“Don’t worry,” Reki reassures even though they both know that Reki’s doing nothing but dodging the issue at hand. “I can have it done by the time you have your beef with Adam. I’ve already made it once so I know what it needs. Just give me a day or two.”

And then Reki turns to walk towards his garage as if he’s going to get started right away. Reki turns to walk towards his garage, away from Langa.

“Reki!” Completely out of his control, Langa’s hand shoots out and grabs Reki around the wrist, holding him in place. He holds as tightly as he can without hurting Reki, determined to not let him get away this time. “Reki, talk to me .”

Reki’s head is bowed and his shoulders are shaking and every already. Broken piece of Langa’s heart somehow manages to break further. “What do you want me to say, Langa?”

With a gentle tug, Langa turns Reki around so they’re facing each other again. He pulls Reki’s hand forward until it’s open in front of him and then he presses Reki’s S pin into his palm, staring with so much intensity it’s almost unbearable because Reki still won’t look at him. His fingers curl under Langa’s, wrapping around the pin as he scoffs, turning his head to the side.

“Why?” Langa presses, his hand still firm around Reki’s wrist. “Reki, why?”

When Reki finally raises his head, his eyes watery at the edges, Langa thinks he might just crumble completely, become a pile of broken dreams at Reki’s feet, waiting for a gentle wind to blow him away. “What purpose do I have there, Langa? I can’t keep up with everyone. I’m not—“ The words seem to lodge in Reki’s throat but he refuses to turn his burning gaze away this time. “I’m not good enough. There’s nothing there for me.”

“I’m there for you.” Langa replies with as much ferocity as he can manage. It sounds feeble, broken, like it’s two seconds away from collapsing entirely. “I’m there for you, Reki.”

“You’re there for Adam.” Reki practically spits Adam’s name, like it tastes bad on his tongue, like he can’t wait to get it away from him. Langa had known that Reki hated Adam, that Adam scared him and seemed dangerous but this— these emotions swirling around Reki’s words, hiding in the depths of his eyes— this was something more than that.

And this is it— the breaking point. This is the moment where Langa can either make or break everything they have between them. Every late night, every early morning, every band aid Reki has carefully put over his wounds have led to this moment. All the knowledge he has of Reki culminates to right now when he has to figure out exactly the right thing to say, has to figure out how to tell Reki what it is that he really feels. His mom had told him to just be honest with his feelings, but that was easier said than done. At the time he’d thought it would be embarrassing but now he’d willingly take embarrassment if it meant Reki would smile again.

How long has it been since he’s seen Reki smile? He feels like he’s being suffocated without it, like the happiness is slowly being drained away from him.

“I thought I was,” Langa begins and he sees Reki flinch away from him, sees the moment Reki tries to build those final walls between them. Holding Reki’s wrist the tiniest bit tighter, Langa rushes on, “But I was wrong. Reki I— I thought it was skating against Adam that made my heart race. I thought it was the speed. But it wasn’t.” Langa shakes his head and a few strands of hair fall into his eyes. This isn’t going how he wants it to, the words are getting all muddled in his head, lost somewhere between his mind and his tongue. “That’s— it’s not—“ He sighs.

But Reki is looking up at him again, his eyes wide and his mouth open like there’s a question poised on the tip of his tongue. There’s the tiniest flicker of hope, a small flame that needs fanning in Reki’s expression. “What?”

“These last few weeks, when you haven’t been there it hasn’t— it hasn’t felt the same.” Langa takes a deep breath and finally lets go of Reki. If he’s going to leave, at least he will have heard Langa out. That’s the most he can ask for. “It hasn’t been fun or exciting. Nothing about it has felt like it did before. Even when I was racing Joe earlier it didn’t— it didn’t mean anything to me until you cheered for me.”

“But…” Reki ducks his head and Langa swallows around the lump forming in his throat. “But you’re so talented.”

“So are you.”

“Not— not like you.” Reki’s loose hair falls even closer around his face as he shakes his head and Langa’s hands long to reach out and brush it away from his eyes.

“Reki, I can only skate because of you.” Carefully, Langa reaches out to place a hand gently on Reki’s shoulder. When Reki doesn’t shy away from the contact, a small piece of his heart repairs. “You taught me how to skate, you made me a board that I could use. All of my skating is thanks to you.”

And that, if nothing else, is the absolute truth.

“But—“

“I want to skate with you, Reki.” Langa emphasizes, the last truths rising to the light. If he’s going to do this, he might as well do it all the way. “I want it to be with you, not Adam. I don’t care about facing Adam if you’re not there with me. And I’m sorry that I made you think otherwise, I’m sorry that it took me so long to figure that out but— it’s not good if it’s not you, Reki.”

The silence that follows lasts long enough to become painful. The sun is rising behind him and the edges of Reki’s hair catch like fire in the sun, glowing and warm. He looks beautiful as he glances back up at Langa, those eyes watery again but full of so much emotion that Langa can finally recognize again.

“I want to skate with you, too, Langa.” Reki says finally, each word a balm on Langa’s battered soul.

“You do?”

“I thought— You were leaving me behind and you’re so much more talented than I am— I was afraid—“

Without any hesitation, Langa tugs Reki forward, throwing his other arm around Reki and clutching him against his chest. Reki drops the broken board somewhere along the way, his own arms wrapping around Langa as he buries his face in Langa’s shoulder, the edges of his hair brushing Langa’s jaw. And just like that, in one swift moment, Langa feels like he can see the light again.

-- x

Reki can feel his S pin, warm against his palm as he fists his hands in the back of Langa’s shirt. He can feel his S pin and Langa both pressed against him, holding his jagged edges together and he can’t help but think that this is exactly how it’s supposed to be. Because Langa may have left him behind for a little while, but he’d come back for Reki. He’d come back and gathered Reki’s broken edges, piecing him back together. He hadn’t given up on Reki even when Reki had given up on himself.

“I should’ve told you sooner,” Langa mumbles into the top of his head, his hands tight around Reki’s back, “I’m sorry, Reki. Please don’t give up skating. Please don’t leave me there alone.”

And that plea is everything Reki wanted to hear. It was everything Reki needed to know— that Langa still wanted to share this with him, that Langa would give up on his idiotic idea to go up against Adam. It was everything Reki wanted, but he knew he couldn’t take it, not like that. Because there was more that Langa wanted and if Reki accepted the apology, if Reki promised to come back to skating and to go back to how things had been, he’d be taking some of those things away from Langa. And no matter how hurt he’d been, he never wanted to take anything away from Langa, that was why he’d left. Because he wanted Langa to have everything he could ever want without feeling like Reki was holding him back.

And now Langa was here, offering to give it all up for Reki and Reki knew that he couldn’t let him do that.

“I’ll make you a deal.” Reki replies instead. He doesn’t love it, but he knows it’s the right thing to do. He knows that Langa needs this, that he needs this if they’re really going to put this behind them. “I’ll come back to S, but only to watch you kick Adam’s ass.”

“Reki?” Langa pulls away enough to look at Reki’s face, his eyebrows drawn together in confusion.

Reki pulls away completely, stepping back and over the broken board so that it fills the space between them again. “Someone has to beat him.”

“So let someone else do it.” Langa takes a step closer, his toes nearly brushing the board. “Not me.”

Reki shakes his head, reaching up to brush some of the longer pieces of his hair back. “It has to be you, Langa.”

And they both know that’s true, Adam won’t rest until he skates against Langa again. Adam has made it abundantly clear that he doesn’t consider anyone other than Langa a proper opponent. If someone is going to take Adam off of his high horse, it has to be Langa, whether Reki likes it or not. He doesn’t like it, not even a little bit, but Langa came back to him, Langa offered to give racing Adam up entirely. Reki has to just trust him now, to stand by his side while he races Adam, holding his breath and cheering loudly, And when it’s all over, all he can do is hope that Langa finds his way back to his side again.

Because just keeping Langa away from Adam wouldn’t be enough. Reki would always be haunted with the question, would always wonder if Langa was satisfied, if he was happy to just skate with Reki at their own pace. He needed to know, to be absolutely certain that he was the one Langa chose.

“I won’t do it.” The amount of conviction in Langa’s voice tells Reki that it’s going to be alright.

“C’mon,” Reki bends down to pick up the broken board between them. “Let’s go get started on your new board. We can figure out the rest from there.”

“Reki, I won’t— I don’t want to—“

“Yes you do.” Reki cuts in but he’s surprised to find that he’s not mad anymore. He’s not even hurt, he’s mostly just afraid. But he’s choosing to put all of his faith in Langa because so far, Langa hasn’t actually let him down. The fact that Langa is standing here in front of him at the first signs of dawn, while the rest of the world is completely asleep tells Reki that Langa hasn’t let him down yet and isn’t going to start now. “And I’ll be there when you do, okay? You know I hate him, I’ll take pleasure in watching you defeat him.”

Langa hesitates, “And if I do this, what then?”

And that answer comes to Reki surprisingly easily. “Then you’ll be the king of S. And I’ll be the one to knock you off your throne.”

The smile that spreads over Langa’s face is slow to come, but no less warm than all the ones Reki has seen in the past. “Is that a promise?”

“Yeah.” Reki says, holding a hand up in front of him. “It is.”

When Langa responds in kind, giving Reki their signature high five and fist bump combo, Reki realizes that maybe their castle wasn’t made out of cards after all. Maybe Langa wasn’t the only one who had gotten lost along the way. Because suddenly, it feels like there’s some solid foundation under his feet again. He takes off towards the garage, Langa in tow and he knows with absolute certainty that neither Adam nor the fear Reki feels in the face of him is strong enough to actually break them apart.

And when Langa kicks Adam’s ass and comes back to Reki to celebrate, well Reki might have a few other things he needs to tell him then. But for now, he relishes the feeling of his heart patching itself back together as Langa settles onto his normal stool in the garage, propping his head in his hand as Reki selects a new piece of wood to begin working with.

Everything may not be okay quite yet, Reki might still have some lingering fears and doubts, but he has Langa by his side again and he knows with Langa there, he’ll be able to overcome any of those things. Everything may not be okay quite yet, but Reki knows that soon it’s going to be okay again.

#renga #sk8 #sk8 the infinity #sk8 spoilers #sk8 the infinity spoilers #sk8 fic #reki gets the hug he deserves #I just needed something last week #after the pain of that episode #so I wrote the reconciliation we needed

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xiumin-on-this-shit · 7 years

Text

Bad Girl Ch 27: When You Aren’t Around

I know you guys wanted a sexy scene with GD but for the life of me I could not write a sex scene, I don’t know why it just wasn’t happening so this will have to do. So if you don’t like this...that sucks. Side note! I have gotten two fan arts, one for bad girl of Joo in her wedding dress which is absolutely gorgeous by @chenrise! And another for Two bosses by @oh-beyond who is amazing! I was just wondering if anyone else would be willing to make me more? I love them so much! Pretty please! Not just for this story but any or all of them?

“Where do you think you are going?” Jiyong coos when he comes into the apartment and sees me with my jacket on. I was late kicking Jihyo out ten minutes ago and I can just imagine how anxious my daddies are getting with me still being out.

I raise a brow at his question, “Jiho is taking me back.”

He shakes his head, “Nope.”

“Oppa, we talked about this.”

“I just got back from a meeting with EXO,” He informs me.

I freeze and narrow my eyes on him as he swaggers over to sit down on the couch in front of me. “You did?”

He nods, he calls me over with a single curling finger, I come to stand in between his legs, his face level with my stomach. His hands snake around my waist and pull us closer together. “You are mine for tonight.”

“Why is that?”

“We had a meeting to discuss a better schedule that will work better for all of us.” As he speaks he pulls me down to straddle his lap.

“You guys were able to sit down and discuss without murdering each other?” I question suspiciously.

“Anything for you.”

Even when he gives me his usual heart warming smile I can’t help but hesitate to fall for it, “So if I call they will know about this? They won’t think I’m dead or out with Jihyo?”

“Beautiful are you really doing this?”

I raise my brows at him.

He huffs, “Fine, call them!”

Without hesitation I pull out my phone and dial Minseok’s number, he answers on the second ring, “Missing us already?” He teases but I hear the hope behind it.

“Is it true you guys had a meeting today and discussed my living arrangement without killing each other?”

He chuckles, “We did, are you impressed?”

“Very, though I would be impressed if you guys sat in a room together for more than five seconds without threatening to kill each other.”

“Oh there were death threats, mean words, people jumping to their feet but without you actually being there made things easier. We weren’t constantly worried about who is touching you at the moment, who is sitting closer, things like that.”

I hum, “Well if I would have known that me being gone would solve some problems I would have suggested it sooner.” I chuckle.

“Don’t say things like that.”

“Right, no disappearing jokes, I’m sorry.”

Jiyong’s fingers dancing on my thigh remind me that he is staring and waiting, mostly patient.

“Well you boys enjoy your night of freedom, it won’t last long.”

“He has you until Thursday night,” Minseok informs me.

“Two whole nights? Wow, how did you manage that?” I question the man now gripping my hips.

“I don’t want to discuss that at the moment, there is something else I would much rather be doing,” Jiyong winks with a soft thrust of his hips, grinding up against me. My thighs clench around his hips, warning him.

“Since you all know where I am and that I’m alive I hope you all have a good night, okay? See you Thursday.”

“Make sure to get some rest, there are young upset boys here still waiting for their time with you. I love you little one.”

I smile, “I love you too Daddy.” I end the call and set the phone aside before looking down at Jiyong.

“I have never been the daddy type but when that word leaves your lips it does something to me.”

I scoff, “I could say anything and it would do something to you!”

“That it true, but why have you never called me something like that?” He halfway whines.

“Because,” I muse wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him closer, “we both know you prefer when I’m screaming your name, not some pet name.”

He closes his eyes and rolls his head back with a moan, “That is also true. My god what in the world did I do to deserve you?”

I only chuckle as I bring him closer to place a few kisses on his exposed neck. His hips stutter once more, “Should we take this to the bedroom?” I purr in his ear.

He shakes his head, “I want you right here, like this.”

“Of course my love.” We kiss slowly at first, I make quick of his suit, throwing his jacket off, his shirt not far behind. He does his best to return the favor but I end up having to take my blouse off myself with a little chuckle at his frustration.

“Do you have any idea how much I missed you?” He mumbles in between our kisses.

I pull away to look down at him, “Jiyong, I thought you didn’t want to talk right now.”

He sighs, cupping my face his thumbs brush my cheeks, “I just want to tell you how much I love you, how I worship the ground you walk on. How I can’t even begin to imagine my life without you. Everyday I stop and think this is it. This is the day you will stop loving me, you will realize that you love all of them more or that you don’t love any of us anymore and leave.”

“Kwon Jiyong,” I snap gripping his face between my hands like him. “Listen to me, I am not, I repeat, I am not leaving you. I need you to look at me and realize that I love you. I’m not going anywhere.”

He smiles, wrapping his arms around me he pulls me into a tight hug with his face in the crook of my neck. He pulls away a moment later lacing our fingers together he brings my left hand to his lips and kisses the rings their softly, never breaking eye contact. “I know, I’m sorry, I forget but this,” He raises the same hand slightly, “will always remind me that I’ve got you. Till death do us part.”

“Till death do us part,” I echo, leaning in closer until our foreheads touch. He smiles.

“Now that we have that out of the way, I’m pretty sure we still have whip cream from last week in there, lets bust that out and have some fun.”

…….

I wrap my kimono around my body as I slip from my bedroom and tip toe down the hall. With Jiyong sleeping I try my best to not wake him up, don’t need him questioning me on where I am going. I reach the elevator easily, I just have to hope and pray to someone that he doesn’t hear the golden box ding when it opens on my floor. Stepping inside I press the button for Jiho’s floor, feeling the strong need to talk to him about this meeting. Even though I’m happy that my daddies and Jiyong were able to talk without murdering each other I’m not a fan of people talking about me behind my back when it actually effects me.

The door opens and I scamper across his apartment to the bedroom, at four in the morning I imagine him passed out in bed, most likely going to be upset by me busting in. I am not expecting to open the door and see Jihyo lying on the bed, her phone in hand wearing one of Jiho’s shirts. She must not be expecting me either because she rolls out of bed in surprise, hitting the floor with a thunk.

“What the hell did you do you idiot?” Jiho groans, stepping out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel around his waist. He freezes in the doorway of the bathroom, I freeze where I am at the bedroom door and Jihyo is still on the floor.

“Apparently you,” I giggle out with my hand over my mouth.

His face turns a bright red, with huff he grabs some clothes from the dresser near his door before stomping back into the bathroom. He slams the door with one more huff, Jihyo and I lock eyes for a minute before I join her on the ground in a fit of laughter. Jiho comes back out a minute later in sweats and a t-shirt, his face still that bright red.

“What are you two still laughing about?” He snarls, pulling me off the ground.

“Oppa!” I continue to die laughing in his arms.

“This isn’t that funny so stop with the giggles. What are you doing here so late?” Jiho sets me down on the bed before going to Jihyo to do the same thing.

It takes Jihyo and I a few tries to stop laughing, I have to remind myself why I’m here in the first place, with a deep breath I finally manage to stop dying and speak like a normal person.

“Sorry, I wasn’t expecting you to have a guest,” I wiggle a brow at him.

“I wasn’t expecting any visitors so I didn’t think it mattered. Shouldn’t you be with those idiots?” He accuses.

“Didn’t you go to that meeting today?”

He shrugs, “I was only there for a few minutes, yelled at some people, got yelled at, left.”

“Well apparently they all got kind of buddy buddy and figured out a schedule for me.”

“When was Jiyong going to tell me about this change? As your head of security I should know your schedule better than anyone.”

“As me I should know my schedule better than anyone,” I snap back.

He sighs as he sits down next to me, “It really bugs you doesn’t it.”

I nod, “I’m happy that they were able to get along for me but I would like to at least know when they are discussing me. I’m not some child they are fighting for custody over, I’m able to voice my own opinion.”

“This is what happens when you let thirteen insane guys control your life,” Jihyo chimes in.

“Thank you so much for your opinion,” I glare at her over my shoulder.

She shrugs, “I told you Paris is still an option. You can even bring this one along.” She nudges Jiho with her toes.

“Really?” I tsk, “What did he do to deserve such an honor?”

“Me.”

Once again Ji and I are dying of laughter.

“Focus,” Jiho snaps his fingers in my face. “We are talking about your asshole boyfriends plotting behind your back.”

“Okay that is an exaggeration, they weren’t plotting, they were just figuring things out.”

“I say that they were plotting as well,” Jihyo once again chimes in with her hand raised.

“Plotting what? Are they going to fake my death again?”

She grimaces, “I mean do you really wanna go threw that again?”

“That will not happen,” Jiho deadpans.

“You’re right, it won’t because they are not trying kill me again.”

“Well what about Jiho oppa? Maybe they are trying to get rid of him, or what about me? They were not my biggest fans the last time I checked.”

“You guys are being ridiculous.”

“Maybe we are, maybe they are trying to get rid of us, maybe we are on a plain to Paris tomorrow morning, there are lots of maybes.” Jihyo clicks her tongue.

I sigh, realizing this conversation is going nowhere, “This was stupid, I’m going home, you guys continue whatever you were doing. Jiho, we are going to talk more in the morning.”

“Wait, let me walk you out!” Jihyo jumps to her feet and begins dragging me along with her. With a glance over my shoulder she leads me into the kitchen where she quickly begins digging in the fridge.

“Ji, what are you doing? I’m leaving.”

“We need to talk.”

Her sudden seriousness throws me off guard, “Is everything okay?”

“No, not really.” She pulls away from the fridge with a container of milk in her hand. Without anymore explanation she continues digging through his cabinets until she finds two bowls and a box of cereal. She sets up on the kitchen island, making us each a bowl before sitting down, dragging me down next to her.

“What do you mean? He didn’t hurt you or anything did he?”

She takes a few bites before mumbling, “I mean that they are hiding something.”

My brow crunches in confusion, “Who?”

She looks over my shoulder again, “All of them.”

“Jihyo could you stop being so cryptic? You are freaking me out.”

“Good! This whole situation should have you freaking out! These guys are full of bullshit!”

“What makes you so sure that it’s all of them?”

“Jiho mentioned something about them being pussies, that they think they are all high and mighty when they don’t even know how to handle something they should have figured out from the beginning. Mumbling something about how they don’t have the guts to tell you. Which means they are hiding something from you, whether it is about Jiho or Jiyong, I’m not sure but it has to be about one of them. I think that’s what they were talking about at this meeting, sure your schedule was an after thought but the main reason I’m sure was for this fucking secret.”

“That’s why they didn’t even mention it to me,” I rub my face in frustration. “Not because things are so much easier to discuss while I’m not there, they are just hiding things from me still. Will they ever just be completely honest with me?”

Jihyo hums, “Probably not.”

“What about Jiho though? I mean you said he could come along, why him?”

“Because I feel like he had a small part in it. Even though I imagine he has done some fucked up shit I feel like he was just the pawn.”

I hum, thinking all of this over. I groan as a headache begins to set in.

“I was thinking about it,” Jihyo mumbles softly which must mean she is about to rip my heart out. When she raises her voice at me, I know she is telling me things I need to hear and she happy to tell me because she knows that it is for my own good but when she does this. When her voice is soft and light and sounds similar to a mother talking to a child I know she doesn’t even want to say the words about to come out of her mouth. These words are never necessary, just something she feels that she needs to add when she really doesn’t. They are always things I never noticed, things I probably should have noticed but choose not to. “I think that they were able to figure things out easier because you weren’t there to hear how they talked about you.”

I just glare at her.

“I know you probably don’t want to hear it but once you think about it, it speaks to their idea of you. That you are theirs not your own in anyway. You said that you aren’t a child they have to fight over well you are wrong. In your daddies eyes you are a child, no ifs and or buts about it. I thought Jiyong would be bigger but he’s not, as much as you wished when it comes down to it he sees you the same way as them.”

“Jihyo please stop,” I half beg, my head begins to pound as I get more and more frustrated. “I need a moment to process this.”

She just eats her cereal in silence. I stare down at my own bowl, not hungry in the slightest. My minds swirls with her words, with all of my loves smiles, with all of their lies.

“Everyone thinks they know what’s best for me.”

“Do you think you think any of them really do know?”

I shrug.

“Do you know what is best for you?”

I don’t answer.

She sighs, “You don’t have to know, you know. As long as you know what is not best for you and avoid that like hell, you should be fine.”

I chuckle.

She pulls something from her bra and sets it on the counter, “Just in case.”

“Jihyo,” I give her sad look when she pulls her had away, revealing a passport I know is not my own but has my picture. A fake.

“Like I said,” She smiles softly, “Just in case.”

#exo #exo daddy #exo mafia #xiumin #GD #kwon jiyong #zico #zico mafia #jihyo #she's just trying to help a sister out #everyone is lying #this maybe confusing #I don't know what I'm doing #no smut #because it hates me

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