#Funnel hates it so much it's kind of funny

[ask-funnel-cake-cookie]

Fun Funnel Fact: They are very very particular about the circus being called a circus and not a carnival. Crackerjack being called a carnival (which it isn't, there's no rides or games anywhere on the entirety of the premises) makes Funnel bristle and be curt about correcting such a transgression.

#funnel cake cookie #Funnel hates it so much it's kind of funny #they are very very very specific about this #they're softer with friends of course but it's almost comical how much it matters to them asdfghj #Funnel: If it was a carnival I would have bloody called it the Crackerjack Carnival but I DIDN'T now did I

[fromkenari]

Listerine Strips, Respect, and RWRB

I obsessively read and watch Behind The Scenes Interviews, which I really shouldn't because famous people are jerks, especially to each other, especially in romantic comedies. There's no respect because of egos. Because romantic comedies have always been about the names they cast, not necessarily the content. Most casts come out of romantic comedies hating everything about it and knowing they were there because of their name and face. Some of them, that's fine. Others... You should watch Hugh Grant's interviews about Love Actually if you haven't. Hugh Grant's interviews in general are top-notch.

Anyway, suppose you've seen a lot of cast interviews for romance movies or even just characters with intimate relations. In that case, there is an alarming amount of disrespect and borderline abusive behavior that used to happen on sets before intimacy coordinators got involved. It often gets panned as "pranks" or "just things that happen on set" because of coworkers trying to get each other to break character and ruin a shot. Sometimes, yes it can be "harmless" fun if the cast has been working together for a long time. But that's not typically the case with romantic comedies. The halitosis "prank" is one of the more common ones. They have a kiss scene, and one of the parties eats something that will cause their breath and mouth to be absolutely abhorrent to the scene partner, who has to believably kiss this person on camera repeatedly, and they don't know until they go in for the kiss.

So the first time I heard about this being inappropriate was at a time in my life when I was so pressed for cash that I got into these sites that had movies that would pay you for views, which, yes, was literally a thing before social media and even YouTube. It's now a defunct avenue, obviously, and I was a member of so many of these sites that I couldn't tell you which one had me watch media for America's Sweethearts (2001), but it was never a studio or distributor directly, of course, it was funneled through these view for pay sites. Anyway.

I'm watching an interview with Julia Roberts, and she's talking about a kiss scene with John Cusak. It's meant to be a Morning After scene, and they're supposed to kiss before getting out of bed. Well, they broke for lunch right before filming this scene, and Julia ate her typical lunch, not thinking much about it, but her lunch had a lot of garlic. So when they went back to set, they got ready to shoot the first take, and at that moment, Julia realized her breath was going to be awful, and she didn't want to do that to John, so she pulled the sheet up over her mouth out of instinct. Then John, staying in character, does the same, and they perform the scene with their mouths covered even though John drops it at one point and Julia immediately lifts it back over his mouth. Her thinking is, "Who really kisses on the morning after their first time with a person they really like? You want to gargle or something first." (This is not a direct quote because it's been decades.) So in the scene, she ad-libs asking if can use his toothbrush to brush her teeth, and when he says yes, they share a chaste kiss with their mouths covered. The director liked it so much they kept it for the following takes.

Final Cut of that scene

This actually really struck me because out of all these damn interviews I had to watch for all these different movies with people describing all of the self-labeled "horrible" things they did to each other on set, this one interview with Julia Roberts about a kiss scene with John Cusak is refreshingly honest and kind of funny in a good way, and I have forgotten all those other interviews, but not this one.

Fast forward to Red, White, and Royal Blue interviews, and this quote from Taylor Zakhar Perez about his and Nicholas Galitzine's intimacy coordinator Robbie Taylor Hunt:

“He was incredible,” Zakhar Perez says of working with Taylor Hunt. “In London there are these brand of mints called Smints, and we called him the Smint Lord because we would always come up to him and ask for a mint or Listerine strip. I didn’t want my breath to be offensive to Nick as soon as we get on set and have to be intimate with each other…”

Source

Literally shattered me a bit when I read that and immediately thought back on the interview from almost 23 years ago. The morals of this story are: respect your coworkers and don't trust actors who say they don't need intimacy coordinators.

#hugh grant #julia roberts #john cusak #america's sweethearts #taylor zakhar perez #nicholas galitzine #robbie taylor hunt #red white and royal blue #out of credits

[fatestayyuri]

Finished Ward Act 2.

thoughts under cut.

I live in hell, lament.

I don't mean to be a hater more than like, what's comedic in the liveblogs to sell the bit. but also whenever i give this fucking serial an inch it throws sand in my eyes and spits on my face. when i go "oh this interaction with children is sweet, i'm glad that Vicky is at least to get some measure of comfort vicariously" they hit me with the "actually one of them might be powered so we have to funnel them into the paramiltary death squad fasttrack" and "Victoria is now going to be a freelance strikebreaker, but this time with Less Oversight". she also wants to fuck her therapist so like, sure. fuck it. i guess we're at that point now.

it's so fucked up very clearly seeing the artifice surrounding the actual genuine compelling core of the story of someone with terminal copbrain due to her trauma and upbringing learning to heal get fucking, impaled fourteen hundred times over by Wildbow moments. There's nascent themes here! of healing! of loss! of taking uneasy, shaky steps forward and trying to mesh the inherent hypocrisy of knowing your abuser deserves a second chance but feeling like that you'd rather kill both of you than be the one to give it to them. I Get It. i really do. but also please stop framing the strikebreaking like it's a good thing.

Sorry i just need to go on here to say that it's supremely funny to me that throwing cars in front of people during a panicked evacuation because they disrespected her Special Baby Girl authority is AFTER all of the conflict counselling is so fucking good. Like??? this is after, huh. it's okay since civies aren't people i suppose, just cargo and luggage

I'm not actually sure if wildbow knows what a strike is. "they're not striking, the two construction groups have just banded together to withhold labor", you say? I don't know maybe it's an intentional oversight on the character's part but at least mention that, goddamn. was he really that proud of the insult Glory Hole to use it twice, too? every time he tries to be witty i genuinely sink into my seat and start boiling alive in second-hand shame. that flirting scene was fucking terrible and the "wow so witty" he gave himself was fucking terrible.

^Wild thing to put slip in there, by the way. "yeah they acted like a union, y'know, making sure the kids were educated, sane, not being SLUTS, not being abused, etc etc"

These writeups aren't edited or like cohesive or coherent at all almost entirely because if wildbow doesn't feel the need to why should i. fuck off, it's ward.

oh right! the therapy group! the therapy group pisses me off so much dude I hate that i love them all i hate that their dynamics are good i hate that they have good chemistry and play off each other and that they feel believable and I hate that i'm gonna read more of this just to see them. Fuck me

uhhh lemme just go down the list... I haven't been given enough information on Chris but I'm liking what i'm seeing tbh, he's cagey and kind of idealistic but also he's like. 13. that's just how they are it's very convincing

Kenzie is good! i like her! she[realises i'm gonna write "is very convincing and compelling for all of these] uhhhhh mirrors a lot of the hangups i had as a kid but also I do in fact completely understand why everyone else wanted me Not In Danger back then

Ashley is too good and hot for Victoria "Cop" Dallon. that is all.

Byron and Tristan are a really interesting character concept to me actually; I have cogent thoughts whirling around in my brain but the only joke i have is that what if they starred in a variant of All or Nothing wouldn't that be fucked up

Rain O' Fire Frazier. She's so trans-coded it's unreal. I love her and how fucked up she is and how she's literally just in this to not get Murderized by her metaphorical family. Girl Same. It is really funny that she gets introduced with a functional kanji pun,

shows up with all her shit fucked up and cracked,

and then leaves with the closest thing of explicit lesbianism that Wildbow has written other than Victoria Dallon's weird thing with the milf therapist.

but from what i hear of Wildbow i'm pretty sure he'll add in a passage about her wanting to settle down with a nice Decidedly Male guy and get pregnant or whatever.

the main thing about Sveta is that she goes "well i *see* myself as disabled" while being like. a quadruple amputee. girl if you are not disabled who is

god. i love these characters. it's such a shame that they're gonna become cops. i hate it here. i hate that i'm gonna read like 1.8 million more words of this. fuck me. fuuuuuuuuuuck.

all in all 7/10 so far

#ward lb

[randoimago]

Good. Then, how about Asahina, Sonia and Akane going on a bowling date with S/O?

Bowling Date

Fandom: Danganronpa

Character(s): Akane Owari, Aoi Asahina, Sonia Nevermind

Type of Request: Headcanons

Note(s): Man I miss bowling. I live in a small town now and the bowling center has like 5 lanes and I'm always too busy to call ahead so it's constantly full 😔

Akane

Probably jokes a little bit when you suggest going bowling. She doesn't hate the idea, it just already gives her old school vibes.

I like to think that she's awful at bowling. Not because she can't aim, but because she can NOT control her strength when she throws the ball. Also doesn't throw the ball like she's supposed to. She ends up getting quite a few warnings and fouls.

It's honestly kind of funny. She pouts a bit at the whole thing, but she tells you that her next ball will be a strike - which when she does bowl properly, she does great, she's just bad at bowling properly.

Asahina

Surprisingly really good at bowling. She does strive to be good at a lot of sports. And it helps that she finds bowling to be very fun.

Makes a bet with you. This is friendly competition after all. If she wins, then she wants you to buy her some yummy, overpriced bowling alley food. She'll settle for funnel cake, but if they have donuts then you know what she wants.

Asahina isn't a big fan of losing. She pouts a bit, but does cheer up easily. The game was really fun and she liked spending time with you. She gladly gives you a big hug and congratulates you if you win. She'll be the one to buy you both some donuts now, totally not using it as an excuse to treat herself too~

Sonia

She doesn't know a whole lot about bowling. She's read about it in books and how effective the ball can be used as a weapon. But she likes the idea of actually playing the game with you.

Sonia gets surprisingly competitive with bowling. Even though she doesn't really have much experience playing it, she still tries her best. She would be the one that ends up being surprisingly good at bowling. She accidentally gets spares and strikes quite often.

Would also be one to ask you to buy her something if she wins. Would want a nice cake, which considering this is a bowling alley, that might be a bit hard to come by. Although she's never had funnel cake before so I can imagine her falling in love.

#danganronpa x reader #akane owari x reader #aoi asahina x reader #sonia nevermind x reader #mantizimus

[deedeli-liveblog]

RWBY ReWatch Volume 5: the one where jaune learns to heal and that’s the only important thing that happens, trust me

From here on out, I’ve only seen these episodes a grand total of once, during my initial liveblog of them. I have not rewatched Volumes 5-7 at any point, so these episodes are going to be the major refresher for me, as far as plot and details I’ve forgotten.

That being said, I remember liking Volume 5 least of all, but I don’t really remember why. IIRC (and I probably don’t) it felt like Volume 5 should have picked up the slower pace that Volume 4 set, but because the story was so divided, it didn’t really accomplish that. It ended up being pretty disappointing.

So, let’s see if Volume 5 fairs better with a rewatch.

I’m trying to remember the song for the Volume 5 OP before it plays, and I have NO idea what it was, or what it was even about. The same for Volume 6, but I adored the Volume 7 and 8 OPs, so I remember those pretty well.

Going through the character shorts now, and I forgot that the action in Volume 5 took a dip in quality too. It’s not anywhere near bad, but it’s noticeably slower than the action in RWBY usually is. Not nearly as exciting.

Sad to know that the reason Lionheart was so happy to know where the Spring Maiden is was so he had new information to funnel to Watts.

How did Oscar find Qrow? Did he just happen to see him, or did Ozpin tell him to walk into every bar in Mistral until he found Qrow, lmao.

oh my god, I never noticed when Qrow was drunk, he boops Oscar on the nose before he walks inside akfhklsdjhlasd

Hm, yeah, I don’t remember this OP at all. The song is nice, but not as immediately catchy like some of the other songs are.

Adam’s new model in Volume 5 make his horns much easier to see.

I forgot how absolutely gorgeous Sienna Khan’s design is. It’s such a shame how underutilized she was.

So. Why does the leader of the White Fang need a whole ass throne room?

God, I hate Adam SO much.

“This curse was bestowed upon me by the Gods, because I failed to stop Salem in the past.” Isn’t it interesting that the Gods are always far more interested in punishing someone than just giving them the tools they need to accomplish their goals? I’d think it’d have been far more useful to Ozma to make him immortal in the same way Salem was, than to just have him reincarnate himself over and over.

There was probably a reason for that that wasn’t just punishment, but like I said, only watched Volume 6 once, so the finer details escape me.

Kind of funny that the bandits thought they could keep a Schnee contained. I mean, even without her weapon, her semblance is pretty versatile, as she later demonstrates. 

The scene with Yang just calmly whooping bandit ass is soooo *chefs kiss*. Like, god, I love her. 

This is the first fight she’s been in since she fought Adam, right? Such a simple spat that she easily wins, but the rush of adrenaline just reminds her body of her last fight, so she can’t even enjoy it. :c

The hug between Yang and Weiss is so beautifully framed. The lighting, the colors, the way the knight shimmers away, Weiss’ feet not touching the ground, she’s just holding onto Yang for dear life. But also the fact that she fully trusts in Yang and her strength that she knows Yang could easily hold her up.

ALSO Home starts playing?? Cause Weiss is finally ‘home’ with a piece of her family and why am I crying???

So. Who is that a painting of that Corsac and Fennec are standing in front of? I have to assume a family member, cause it looks like they have Fennec’s ears.

It’s almost funny what a poor job Raven does at trying to convince Yang to stay. “You’re family and friends that you’ve known for so long have been lying to you, but I, family in name only and a practical stranger to you, will tell you the complete truth if you stay with me.” And she says this after being antagonistic to Yang the entire conversation. 

hehe, get fucked raven

Yang says “no more lies” if they’re gonna work together, and Ozpin agrees, and then immediately proceeds to keep lying alkdhskhahfks

“I know all about your master.” Wait, that’s right. Raven must’ve found out that Salem can’t be killed, that’s why she ran away from helping Oz.

“... a fall maiden with a surname so appropriate, she probably picked it herself. Something tells me you’ve got a slight case of ego-mania.” afkjsdkhalsfsfs

Cinder was so blinded by her ego and the chance to enact revenge that she readily agreed to inviting Ruby and Co. to Haven, and couldn’t see how obviously that was part of Raven’s plan. Like, if they had just followed the plan the way Watts wanted to, Cinder would’ve had the spring maiden’s power and the relic relatively easily. Then she could’ve just  hunted Ruby afterwards. 

Ohhh, the song that plays when Ilia and Blake finally face each other and grab their weapons is soo good. A dramatic swell that highlights the tragedy of the moment.

Knowledge, Creation, Destruction-- all of these are pretty self explanatory in what they might do. But what the hell could the Choice Relic possibly do? Something big, I assume, if Oz wanted it hidden directly under his guard, and he made it much more difficult to find than the others.

Also, I’m sure there’s something to be said about Choice being the most powerful of all, but I’ve not the brain power to put that into words, and being hidden under the incredibly manipulative Ozpin.

And speaking of the relics, I imagine the first thing Salem would ask Jinn is how to find the relic at Beacon.

“I’m not afraid, I’m smart.” What?? lol Salem’s goal is the destruction of Humanity, and you are human. There’s nothing smart about not choosing to fight her because if she wins you’ll still die.

what the hell is Kali’s tray made of that it can block bullets

oh my god, she killed a man with that tray

I love Ilia’s character arc this volume. I hope we see her again.

This entire volume the captions have been delayed on Rooster Teeth’s site. :/

“Take out the Aeris” who the fuck is doing these captions. Not only have they been delayed, but they’ve also been completely wrong multiple times, and now we’re just making words up

It’s kind of sad to see how reliant on her summoning Weiss became. She’s trying very hard to summon her knight, even when she doesn’t really have the opportunity to, and gets taken down by Vernal in a few hits because of it, but she’s normally such a capable fighter.

Hazel and Gretchen, Hansel and Gretel is the inspo, I suppose.

Hazel’s motivation is so weak. Like, Ozpin wasn’t even the one who killed her, he just didn’t tell her no. And Hazel’s really willing to kill all of humanity just to spite Ozpin??

Ohhh, damn. It’s crazy to see just how far Cinder’s Grimm arm encroaches onto the rest of her body in the future. In the reveal she still has her shoulder at least.

hehe, get fucked adam

Holy shit, I forgot Weiss stabbed Hazel in the kidney with the lancer stinger.

Raven’s lucky that her daughter is actually a good person, and didn’t tell anyone that she was the spring maiden.

i mean... blake could’ve still apologized for abandoning them like that :V she had her reasons, but it was still fucked up. Ruby at least left a note when she left and apologized to Yang when she later saw her.

That was Volume 5! All in all, not bad. I still enjoyed the volume, there’s nothing immediately wrong with it. Plot wise it was good, and I wouldn’t say it was slowly paced. Just that the story being split between so many characters made it feel a lot slower, at least until the last 5 or so episodes. There was also a notable lack of action this volume, in comparison to previous volumes, and what little there was was just... alright. For a show like RWBY, whose action segments was a major selling point, it is pretty disappointing.

That being said, I enjoyed a lot of the character moments and plot threads that we were given here.

Onwards!

#RWBY #RWBY liveblog #liveblog #RWBY ReWatch

[charlunday]

Which The Hunger Games characters :

1. Do you relate the most?

2. Do you think missunderstood by fandom?

3. Do you want to know better?

Please give reasons for your answers. And you can pick more than one character for each question.

Thank you :)

@curiousnonny

First of all, thank you for the ask! I don't get many, as you can see, so I really really appreciate it whenever I do!

1. This is a tough one.. I'm not sure I exactly relate to any THG characters in the way I do with other things (ex: Ben Hanscom from IT is me and I am him and it makes me cry), so to satisfy your question I will now take a quiz to see which character I am.

There's your answer! (Why did this actually kill me? "Always trying to see both sides of a situation." I've actually been doing this thing where whenever I'm annoyed by something, I try to think of how it could bring someone joy 💔)

2. I could talk about this one forever, and it's kind of a controversial opinion, but I think Gale isn't given all the credit he deserves. Don't get me wrong, sometimes his actions are questionable, but I think he's an angry 18/19 year old kid that had this rage over his own oppression that was easily manipulated by a regime to funnel him into the war machine. It happens so often in real life, and we clearly see this channel in the books! So I don't hate Gale. I think he's a complex, heartbreaking character who deserves time to mature and heal like everyone else.

3. I also haven't thought about this one much, but if I were to pick someone to know better... well, there's so many tbh. But I think the one I wonder most about is Katniss' father. He seems like such an interesting character. I don't mean I want a whole book on him or anything, just more tidbits about him and his relationship to his family. I have actually drawn him a couple of times, which is funny because he doesn't even have a name.

Thank you for this ask! I had a great time answering it and really thinking about all these things.

#i hope i dont get killed for saying gale is redeemable #the hunger games #thg #peeta mellark #gale hawthorne #mr everdeen

[jkastudio]

Shoshanna studio assistant!!

This is my first time back a at pes after I left a year ago.

This place has always been like weird and beautiful at the same time.

It’s beautiful because of the people who occupy these pieces and it’s also weird because of some people of these places. Well, Rebecca.

P I called PES the gift that keeps on giving and it always show cowl this PES if there’s a funnel that goes through me. It’s amazing how I still get opportunities. Displays like a year after I left.

I didn’t really realize it how big this was going to hit me when I come back in the space after year.

It was kind of emotional honestly because there was a lot of changes in the space and it felt you add for bigger at the same time. Layqa I was lost but at the same time I knew where the places were so there was a lot of changes.

Like I couldn’t really be in the space without thinking about Maryland and Jahi in the internship plus last summer. With us either User or I just look for in Marylin. I remember the times we will be chit chat is Tito playing are tarot cards, jumping around studios. It was such a good time. That was also when I reconnected with Jahi and I love spending time with him but it’s funny because I just had a studio visit him to have recently and I’m just so glad that we also still today friends till todY.

That place has always been good, but it’s also always been hostile. What mood Rebecca is in you don’t know if she’s gonna talk to you that day or she’s gonna hate you that day. It’s always been like anxious Lee driven, and I’ve hated that honestly. So today I didn’t even like look for her. I honestly could have avoided her. They will see her at all because it’s not always pleasant talking to her.

That I really could’ve had like a better experience there if it wasn’t for her bipolar episodes. I honestly even got like a bitter end of the deal. Maryland really went through that shit and I felt so bad about her. The hallways still feel so cold because of her. It’s just sad because that place really could be phenomenal if it wasnt for her attitude problems.

I saw her recently at Gardenship and I wanted to talk to her but she would like literally right away. I’m just leaving such a bad taste in your mouth like it doesn’t have to be that way Layqa Yawar just so annoying.. but I’ll be still like her when she gets his projects L O L.

But anyway, Like this really felt like a homecoming to me. This is really where I started my art adventures especially during the pandemic. This is really help me open the doors with the cups of the art world.

This is my first time dealing with artist is like learning from them heads odd liquid on one, and that has always been such a rewarding experience for me. It is a type of work I really do.

It was so nice to see Jasmine Mans there. She was really happy to see me even though I know she look. He hates me know back-and-forth.

And then I also saw Kwesi for a little bit. I feel so bad because I would be that way but wow like I was so so so so so happy to see him it’s crazy. I haven’t seen him in a year and it felt like it was yesterday we were working together in the studio feels exactly the same. It’s exactly the same and it was just I got so emotional when I saw it because I spent like maybe six months there and it was just so nice he treated me so well too. We had so much fun there.

He was telling me how I can use his studio any time I could come back and times you say showing machine and he even wanted to give me a key to his studio which is insane but I just always appreciate varsity of people and how much people are willing to help you genuinely.

Even Lenny, I saw him there and he help me with my scholarship letter, and he’s always there to help me with any questions, and just so generous

What select the best part about working in the yard so it’s just the people that you meet. Artists are so genuine, loving, caring, kind, and generous it always just amazes me. It’s just always touches my heart because it really is community work full of love generosity and kindness.

It’s just so touching because you will really see that type of exchange anywhere else not incorporate anywhere else but here it’s like little vehicles every day like it’s such a gift to feel that type of connection with people. People you don’t even know like people he just work with, but they would go so far for you and it’s just warms my heart completely.

A lot of people that I meet, would let me use their studio for free (jahi, josh, kwesi, lenny.) They would let me use their materials they would teach me skills they would even give a studio key for me to use like they would give me so much for nothing in return. Even recommendation letters. They are always like use me for reference. So freaking cool.

And the thing is they would always offer. I would never really have to ask.

I think that’s such a beautiful thing I think that’s what life is all about and that’s really what keeps me going in the art world.

The kid believe how lucky I am to have but these wonderful people get so lucky that I have all of you had good experiences with artists I could go around just asking people for the studio visit etc.

A lot of times I don’t understand why people do what they do. How do I decide where they like me so much where they’re giving me so much I think it’s just such a beautiful thing for somebody to literally give me their keys to their studio just like wow it’s so nice to see and with this such a genuine human connection like it I will never take it for granted that goes going to be grateful about these things, so thank you Lord for giving me this experience.

It’s funny because I didn’t realize like I have connected with so many people now in the world that I literally cannot keep track. Like I have updated a lot of people in my life about like my grad school stuff but there’s still like people that are even get to talk to reach out to and then now I’m just like oh my God I gotta talk to them and tell them about all these things.

It’s all good because everyone is just so supportive they’re always so happy to hear from me and see me and if it was like looking out for another and think of me with opportunities pop-up it is just so wonderful

And of course, Shoshanna is amazing that it’s so funny because she would talk so much ass who would end up like just chitchat in the whole day. I know she doesn’t get any work done and it’s so funny to me.

But she’s also look so kind, generous and so nice and I just can’t believe like all the people I work with are just so nice that I am so lucky

What a wonderful homecoming

It feels so good to come back when everything started for me

It’s nice to know that I know everyone is welcoming me back with open arms and they haven’t forgotten about me and they still love and care for me

Newark still has space for me. It’s great because it’s been a year but I just hopped on the trailer then go like I I know how things work I know how things are and everything is still wear it supposed to be here and I just went on my day. It’s crazy feeling because everything is like automatic like I never left. It’s like yesterday I was doing the same routine.

It feels good to be back, I feel like there is still a lot of opportunities for me here and I’m barely scratching the surface. I am worrying if I’m leaving to soon

Moments like these like make me want to stay.

But I know that every time an opportunity and I’m always the heck shag looking for another freelance job to show up in that can be hard sometimes

But yeah, I’m just so happy and I feel so warm that a space can look at me like that. I think it’s just so beautiful.

This is really what I do this for. Even if I don’t like make my own all right, I’m just so happy that my hands are making all right and being a part of something important.

That’s what I think that also really like I like being a part of things I like being a part of creation making, looking important things, things that matters. Having relationship with people and making art.

Even though like you really don’t get paid enough like for me, it’s worth pursuing because it’s just so rewarding and special and human. I think this was human experience with the R4.

[vxctorx]

@exquisitexagony You are cordially invited to the summer soirée at Ardleith Manor.

The Young Socialite

Name: Elijah “Remington” Floquet Age: 24 Gender: AMAB // gender-fluid FC: Timothée Chalamet Bio: Having intimate relations with Hawthorne was really only just the tip of the iceberg for young Remington Floquet. Elijah had been working his way up the social ladder for years, finding his place amongst the rich and famous and otherwise heavily endowed. He was sliding by on the money of wealthy landowners, entrepreneurs, anyone whose bed he could find himself in. Young and still quite naïve, Rem has been known to party hard, almost always found with a drink in hand or a cigarette between his teeth. Their cares are minimal when it comes to their daily life, shirked into the hands of lovers whose beds they’ve surfed between. Strangely, he’s been with 3 separate lovers who mysteriously passed—one a certain Emily Dubois who allegedly died of “natural causes” left her inheritance to Rem, Eric Markoffski who passed in a tragic car accident leaving his estate in Eli’s very incapable hands, and an elder man by the name of Henry Allen who made his fortune in film and theatre only to funnel it all into a gambling pyramid scheme which fell apart just before his alleged suicide. As strange as it is for Rem to be so deeply connected with so much death in a few short years, no questions have come to them since they’ve come out squeaky clean in each investigation. If anything, these occurrences have only brought them higher up the social ladder, bringing pitying ladies and gentlemen of all sorts to his very feet. Whether or not these deaths had anything to do with himself is still rumoured in some smaller circles uninterested in the flashy, flamboyant, fashionable young gent full of charisma, spark, and a baby face that makes it hard to accuse him of much of anything.

Other: - may or may not have committed and gotten away with murders in the past - has been having private intimate relations with Hawthorne prior to his murder - engages in prostitution, but also does acting and modelling work - despite all of the money he’s gathered from jumping from sugar daddy to sugar mommy, Rem has done a rather splendid job of entirely blowing it all as he goes - moves on to another lover as soon as money dries up or he gets bored of their company - uses any and all pronouns, gender expression leans to the more feminine side - arrogant, selfish, obnoxious, drinks too much, high all the time, hates when people touch his hair, has a temper yet to be seen by most, been to jail for public indecency - charismatic, charming, fashionable, funny, enthusiastic, attention whore, dramatic - the kind of person that would fake an injury for attention - loves glitter

#exquisitexagony #V; The Manor Mystery

[hellmouth-manor]

A Dog's Feeling || Hibiki || Trial 3.2 || Re: Her, Masks, Performance

It is a blessing and a shame that this is happening in public.

Hibiki Shinobu is reassured that this is all real, that his reactions are normal. That his heart breaking into a million pieces isn't weakness, no matter how much it feels otherwise.

It is so deeply impossible to pretend this isn't happening anymore. Even that kindness can't be afforded to him, Cassie—Cassansdra—Yukiko. Yukiko. It's such a nice name, isn't it?—she's elected to take everything in one fell swoop.

And she'd known. She wouldn't be shoving that stupid demon's stupid note in his face otherwise.

He'd opened nearly everything in him up to that that specter who promised she'd accept him. There were two things kept close to his chest, one of them being feelings he barely knew how to process. Gratitude that gave way to affection, a hopeless infatuation with someone who seemed hellbent on caring about everyone here no matter how little he—how little they might have deserved it.

Affection gave way to gratitude once again; he'd been thankful to simply exist alongside that brightness he'd never seen before. He'd dropped shameless comments about her kindness being dangerous for him—a catalyst for him to fall even harder, something he was so afraid of. He was so afraid to allow her to know his affection, taint that kindness with pity and let him down gentler than he deserved. He was scared to do that to her, put someone so nice in that terrible position. Or maybe he was scared of how it would feel to know heartbreak after learning heartache.

It was a decision he'd never had the power to make in the first place, it turned out. You don't get to decide your relationship to a mask, you simply get to admire the craftsmanship, enamor yourself with the performances it can enable. It's not your choice when it falls, what its owner does with it when the show is over.

He'd called himself her number one fan.

She'd performed so impeccably, too.

It wasn't just his hurt to bear, though. As was made clear by everyone else's reactions, Cassandra Adams would be mourned by so many. Tears continue streaking Hibiki's face as he processes this, as he ponders the blessing of shared hurt while his head hangs down and he hides his expression. Everyone would bear this together, in whatever ways they deemed most effective. Most necessary.

The shame was in how spurned he felt. To fall apart so messily in front of this audience, body wracked with repressed sobs as he leaned against his podium for support. It was so sickening to let everyone else see this. So perverse, to display his selfish hurt so brazenly.

To pretend he had any right to feel so indignant that anyone else would lay claim to these feelings.

To want, so desperately, for this all to end and the joke to reach its punchline. Sorry for scaring you, it wasn't me, I just thought it would be funny.

You can still be a hero.

Hibiki has to say something, the Shinobu in him still burns bright enough that his tears won't extinguish that rage. That wrath.

The warm familiar. The only friend he can trust. That which can't burn out.

He holds onto the things he can be mad at. He could flare indignantly over how fucking funny it must look. Heather is having her laugh, why wouldn't he assume Hisashi and Olwin aren't having just as much fun? Their stupid audience? Watching him lose everything that kept his head above water in one fell swoop. Laughing. They could burn.

He can't be mad at Yukiko. Not yet. He doesn't know how to hate, right now. His heart wails with grief and shame and loss and yearning.

But he can pretend too, can't he? Pretend he can go on and he can survive. Pretend he doesn't want to forgive and forget and do whatever he has to for this connection not to sever.

Shinobu chokes down his tears, swallows his grief and feeds it to the fire, funnels it all into a forge that will offer back the steel he might rebuild himself with. Nobody will see him break down again. Nobody will ever see him cry again.

Nobody will ever hurt him again.

A deep breath in. Ten seconds. Hold. Ten seconds. Out. Ten seconds.

"...The joke is on us, then. We…we lost your stupid game. Fine. You…you threw your life away for it, fine. It isn't like you had anything waiting for you outside anyways. Maybe this is the place you want to be in most. I wouldn’t know. I don’t know what to trust anymore. But this...isn't the breaking point. Call us stupid. Look down on us, and laugh, and laugh, and...remember. We've made it through every one of these. We...we started our stay here, with one of these."

In.

Ten seconds.

Out.

Five seconds.

The mask doesn't break

It does crack.

"...You're going to go down, and then you'll be right back here to deal with the fallout, and nobody is going to make it fun for you. It’s going to hurt. It's all going to hurt. I hope it does.”

#ch3 #trial #hibiki

[nostarsfornaughtyboys]

S8 Cast on Alex and Greg

WHAT WAS YOUR RELATIONSHIP LIKE WITH ALEX: DID YOU FIND HIM HELPFUL?

Jo: He's such a tremendously likeable person. I hope my relationship with him is just a friendly one, really. He's so genuinely helpful. Occasionally he'll steer you, without telling you what to do. And he'll describe the limits of what he's prepared to accept physically in the challenge. But I wouldn't dream of humiliating him.

Katy: I adore Alex. I feel like it's having a calm therapist there. I often used to start a task by hugging him, but he didn't want to do that. I thought it was nice but he didn't like it. You see in his face he wants you to do well and he's encouraging, and you think he's going to be there for you, but he's such a stickler for the rules. All he ever says is, 'All the information is on the card'. I think I did get more confident with asking him stuff though, as time went on.

DID YOU USE ALEX MUCH DURING THE TASKS?

David: Yeah, I used him a lot. He's been ornamentally very useful at times. He tends to say 'yes' if you ask him to take his clothes off, or stand over there and be hurt. He's a facilitator.

Ed: Yeah. Mainly because I know Greg, and I know he really enjoys seeing Alex being tortured. So that was my tactic. I used him in the water feature task. I turned him into a mermaid fountain. I finished that and went, 'I've nailed that'. That's the closest I've seen him to being genuinely p****ed off, because I took his top off, I taped two funnels to his bare skin for boobs, then put a hose inside them. It was mid-February so he didn't like that. I also turned him into an egg-timer by making him eat one snack every second for six minutes. So yes, I've used him in a way that would upset him and make Greg happy, in a desperate bid for points.

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN GREG AND ALEX?

David: It's a very classic 'big and little man', a low status playing against a high status, like Ray Allen and Lord Charles. Alex is basically the ventriloquist's dummy. It's really funny. I love Alex's commitment to the rules, and Greg just bulldozing through those rules but still being the one who decides on the points. The chats in the studio are really, really funny.

Ed: I didn't realise it was quite so real. That thing of Greg bullying Alex, I thought Alex was fully on board with those. But then, being here, you see that he's not totally okay with it. Greg texted me one night before a studio show and said, 'Wait til you see the introduction I've done for Alex tomorrow - he's going to hate me'. It's so electric in the studio. The audience don't know who to side with because they love them both to bits.

Jo: I think it could quite easily trip over into some kind of court case. Greg does really tease Alex but he has a real fondness for him so there's nothing sinister going on, shall we say. I've probably got that wrong and in a year's time Greg will be in prison.

Katy: Well, it's mum and dad, isn't it? Light bickering. What's really sweet is that Alex will gain confidence and run with something, then Greg will squash him with one look or one comment. It makes me sad how quickly he loses his confidence. He genuinely is very easy to embarrass. He doesn't like anything dirty. I think there was one task where I wanted to use my bra for a task, and he was very uncomfortable with that. I guess it's bullying, but it's kind of fine. Maybe because we know Greg has respect for Alex, very very deep down, deep in his shoes. It couldn't work with just one of them. Greg would just be too, too angry on his own. And Alex would be muttering quietly on his own.

Rose: Abusive? I constantly feel sorry for Alex. He's the sweetest boy in all the world and he has the sweetest little face, and Greg is all mean to him. But weirdly I'm into both their energy. I respect both in deeply different ways. I don't really know whose team I'd be on if they were to ever fight. Greg's frustration is totally genuine. I thought it was put on for camera but he actually does get that fed up with Alex.

#greg davies #little alex horne #david baddiel #ed gamble #jo brand #katy wix #rose matafeo

[slasherrabbitmadness]

Sinclair Brothers Au X Reader (F)

Highschool Au with the Sinclair Brothers. Fluff and Angst. Bo mentions sexual stuff but in a joking manner.

They have a crush on you while you're dating someone else.

SFW, Fluff, and Angst.

Bo Sinclair - Female Reader dating Lester

He hated this. His stinky, stupid little brother just had to bring his girlfriend over. You’re supposed to be his girlfriend. You just never got the memo.

Lester had the biggest smile on his face as you and him sat next to each other at the dinner table. Vincent wasn’t paying attention, too engrossed in his gumbo and comic book while Bo sat there shooting daggers at his brother. Thank god Bo is always in a pissy mood around his family, they thought nothing of his sneer.

Bo watched with fury whenever he caught Lester leaning in close to you. His brown eyes look at you with adoration. Could tell when Lester ran his hand up and down your thigh, thinking he was being slick. Amateur.

“Y’know, Y/N, ever since you’ve started dating Les, he’s been showering. See Trudy, told ya it’d take a girlfriend to get him to act human.” Lester went bright red and looked down in embarrassment.

“Victor! What you mean is it’s nice to see Lester so happy he’s just showing us all just how happy.” Trudy knew what Victor said was right, just it broke her heart to see Lester’s face fall at his words.

“Let’s hope it lasts,” Victor mumbled.

“It won’t,” replied Bo.

“Beauregard! Can you not?” Trudy fumed. Bo stood up from the table not wanting to be a part of the awkward tension that was dinner. He stole a glance at you as he walked away. He swore he saw it, that look. The look of “Please don’t leave.”

He lied in bed, not wanting to listen to your laughter downstairs, Lester singing your praises, how you both planned on going out Friday night for another date. Fuck.

That night it was Vincent who went to Check up on Bo. Your Twin will just know when something is off.

“She looked at me, y’know. I could read her eyes. She didn’t want me away from her.” Bo said with a smug knowing tone. Vincent shook his head and signed,

“She probably felt bad, felt awkward, it was her first time here.”

“Ya, well, let’s hope it’s her last.”

Vincent turned towards the door. He slumped his shoulders. Bo took in what Vincent was staring at. His stupid stinky little brother. Lester’s eyes, usually so vibrant, were downcast, a little glossy even.

“...Just because you hate her, Bo…” Lester couldn’t finish before he walked away from his older brothers, cursing himself for not sticking up for you.

Vincent gave Bo a knowing look and left.

Bo stewed on his bed, remembering when he first fell for you. Mrs. Power had partnered you up in science class. Bo wasn’t the best partner, he never did the work but he sure could make you laugh. When you first laughed at one of his jokes, be it from genuine humor or just being nice, Bo fell in love.

Then why didn’t he ask you out? Why did he have to date those other girls instead of you? Would be an ass to you in front of his friends but sweet on ya when it was just you and him. Why did Lester have to bug him at his lockers? Lester had immediately taken a shine to you right then and there. Why did you have to fall for his stupid stinky little brother, the one who used axe body spray like a shower? The weird one who collected roadkill and was friends with the employees at the dump.

How in the hell could his brother think he hated you. You. Warm, funny, kind you.

Bo doesn’t hate you. He wishes he did...

Lester Sinclair - Female Reader dating Metalhead Vincent

Lester made his way to Bo’s truck. Dodging past his peers and moving cars, Bo always parked the furthest away in the student parking lot. He wanted his car right at the exit so he could get the hell out of school asap.

“Hey, Bo!”

“Hey, Rat boy.”

“Don’t fuckin’ call me that.”

“What? You are our Rat boy.” Lester hated his brother. But he was Lester’s ride home so he never pushed a disagreement too far.

The two stood in awkward silence just waiting. Bo broke the silence with a huff. “The Freak is probably three deep in her right now.” Normally Lester would laugh at such a crude remark but it involved you. He didn’t want to treat you as some faceless girl the guys joked about being ‘loose’

“That freak better hurry up, he has a doctor’s app in an hour. And Dad likes it when a patient gets there early. Crotchety old man…”

Lester just stood there, remembering the last skin graft surgery and how the skin didn’t take to Vincent at all. Vincent tried his best to hide the pain, the physical and mental, but late one night he could hear his brother sobbing a room away.

“You know since he started dating, Y/N, he’s been less nervous about these appointments. Fine by me, I can’t stand when his ass gets all moppy.”

Lester knew what Bo meant. Bo got just as nervous as Vincent and vice versa. It was some weird twin thing they shared.

“There’s the fucker!” Bo pointed you and Vincent out. Lester had seen you and Vincent countless times together and every time he saw you both it felt like the first time all over again. That twist in his gut and pain in his throat. He remembers the first time he saw you with Vincent. You were acting all shy around Vincent’s metalhead buddies. They kept patting Vincent on the back,

“Good job, man!”

“Didn’t think you’d get a cute one.”

“Hey, Y/N, got any friends?”

Vincent wore his wax facial prosthetic covering most of his face but Lester knew that his brother was as red as a tomato.

Lester remembers meeting you in geography class. In the same group tasked to map out the local park. You and Lester buddied up, mapping the wooded trail. “Oh, Lester look, frog bones!” You quickly covered your mouth, embarrassed at pointing out something so weird but Lester fell in love. A girl into vulture culture? Perfect. You and Lester looked around for more bones, finding none. You handed him the frog skull. “Here, a memento of this weird day.” You smiled as you said it, Lester knowing you wanted to say more but fear of sounding sappy took over you.

Lester should have known it was the beginning of the end of the night you stopped by to drop off his assignments after he had been sick with mono. Instead of Lester at the door greeting you, it was his long hair, covered in judas priest-like stud bracelets and, Metallica shirt-wearing brother.

“Hi, Vincent! Huh, these are for Lester, do you mind giving these to him?” Lester wanted to scream out to you but with his groggy state wouldn’t allow it. He had no idea what Vincent was attempting to say to you, Vincent could speak but it was horse and quiet. Lester fell back asleep, your laughter from downstairs should have been soothing, should have made him feel better, but knowing it was because of Vincent…

You and Vincent were hand in hand making your way to Bo’s truck. Bo wore a straight face while Lester hid his disdain. “Hey, Lester!” You shouted with a smile! Damn it, Lester tried to hide his blush, he turned his head around to make sure you didn't catch it.

“Y/N, wanna ride home? If so, hurry up, Candle Head has an appointment.”

Vincent flipped Bo off and helped you into the truck. You snuggled together in the back seat of the car, Vincent nuzzling into your hair and murmuring sweet nothings.

Bo gave Lester a look, smirking at Lester’s scowling.

Vincent grumbled as Bo pulled up to your place. He tapped Bo on the shoulder and Bo nodded, understanding his brother without words.

Vincent walked you to your door, his large hand holding yours. You kept looking up to Vincent, smiling and giggling.

“Les, you can stop scowling.” Said Bo.

Lester grumbled.

“If it helps you, do it for now. Just learn to get over it. Vincent has never been happier. When Candle Head is happy, I feel it. When he’s sad, I feel it. So just let Vincent have this. Besides, you chickened out on asking her.”

Lester ignored his brother and watched you and Vincent. “Oh shit, haha, Hey Candle Head! Nice one!” Bo shouted out the window to his brother, making Lester’s ear ring in the process.

Lester watched as Vincent removed some of his wax prosthetic and gave you a deep kiss. His stomach churned, his heart stopped, his head felt full and his left ear was still ringing.

Bo was right. Lester had chickened out. He had so many opportunities to ask you out but his insecurities got the best of him. He couldn’t be too mad, Vincent was happy for the first time in years. He’d learn to be happy for his brother, but not happy at losing out on you.

Vincent Sinclair - Female Reader dating Bo.

“Hey, Vin, want some? Vin?” Vincent stared intently, eye not leaving you. Lester spoke up “Hey, Candle Head?” Vincent whipped his head at his little brother, he had his prosthetic on but Lester knew he was scowling. “Hey, got yer attention. Want some of this?” Lester shoved a funnel cake in his brother's face. Before Vincent could react “Well, too bad, you’ll have to get yer own.”

God, Vincent hated his brother sometimes. Speaking of brothers. Bo had you under his arm, shouting over your head to one of his friends “Ya, see you later, no, much later, I’ll be busy!” He leaned down to kiss your cheek “Busy with you, Dollface.” Vincent loved your laughter, just hated when it was Bo who made you laugh.

“Hey, Candle Head, gotta fiver?”

“Bo, don’t call him that, it's mean.”

“It’s a family thing, Candle Head don't mind, right?”

“Stop it, Bo!”

Bo scoffed at you and sneered at Vincent. “I’m gonna bum us some food.” He said to you as he kissed you on the forehead. Bo slammed his shoulder into his brother as he walked by. Vincent stood firm, his wider frame feeling nothing against his brother.

Walking up to Vinny you placed your hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry for him. I know he’s your twin but he still doesn’t have to be that mean.” Vincent shrugged his shoulders, hands deep in his pockets. He fought the strong urge to pull you into him, hold your head into his chest and never let you go. He hated himself for being so sappy over you but he really couldn’t help it.

Vincent remembered when he first met you, the school library after class time. He was looking for an art history book. He saw you in the same aisle, grabbing scanning for what he remembers was ‘a book about frogs’ It was for your science class. Vincent walked over to you, did his best to speak, and ask what you needed. You excitedly told him, which shocked him. Mostly because, even though he talks to girls, they are never happy to talk to him. You rambled on and on to him, how annoyed you were at your stupid science partner, Bo. Vincent laughed, explaining to you that was his stupid brother.

“I feel like an ass. Sorry.” You sighed and hid your face behind your hands. Vincent assured you that it was okay and Bo is an asshole. If Bo was an asshole, why did you have to start dating him?

He remembers when Bo snapped at you in the hallway, the embarrassment was all over your face. Remembers when Bo stood you up on a date. You came into school the next day cussing out Bo. He called you a bitch and from that moment on he found a new sense of hatred for his twin.

“Hey, Candle Head, get yer own girlfriend, Babe, get over here.” Vincent gave you a sad look as you returned one to him. You ran into Bo’s arms and he spun you around, careful not to drop the red snow cone in his hand. “See, Babe, Red, so we both can enjoy it.” You giggled sweetly at him, he held it up to you, pushing it into your nose.

“Bo!” You scolded but laughed as he kissed the red juice off the tip of your nose.

Vincent’s feet felt like lead. He wanted nothing more than to walk away and not look at the gut-wrenching scene, but seeing you bashful and just got to Vincent. He’d give anything to have that be you and him. Give anything to go back to the day he met you and ask you out himself.

“Come on, Candle Head, we need one more person for the strawberry twirly ride thing,” Bo called out, gesturing for Vincent to follow. You turned to Vincent and grinned at him.

“Come on, Vinny!” For you, Vincent would follow. No matter how much it hurts.

#Bo Sinclair #Vincent Sinclair #Lester Sinclair #Bo sinclair x reader #Vincent Sinclair x reader #Lester sinclair x reader #House of wax #Slasher x you #Au #Female reader #SFW

[autisticandroids]

anyway ok so lets talk about ruby SPECIFICALLY in my good s6 au. this ruby concept is almost the same as @lesbiansamwinchester‘s ruby lives au but has some key differences, mainly ruby doesn’t redeem herself in s5. lucifer raises her in sympathy for the devil because she really was the best of those sons of bitches and she deserves it but she spends all of s5 conflicted in her loyalties because while she really DOES want lucifer to win she is also In Love With Sam, Unfortunately, and gets more and more uncomfortable with sam being lucifer’s vessel and shit. and then she finally betrays lucifer in like, two minutes to midnight or swan song and he IMMEDIATELY kills her (very important: lucifer must already be possessing sam when this happens). then she’s brought back like. face down in a ditch 300 miles away. that’s how ruby ends season five.

anyway watch this video to set the mood. ruby stuff in season six:

- so at FIRST she is actually running around with a ragtag group of lucifer loyalist demons led by meg. meg kind of hates her for betraying lucifer for sam but also you know sam’s dead and ruby won’t do it again and most importantly they need EVERY pair of hands on board for this. so ruby is kissing huge amounts of ass mostly meg’s, like, meg is making her wait on her hand and foot in an apron. it’s comically villain homoerotic. you know. like ruby serves meg tea in a maid outfit for no other reason then as like. ridiculous humiliation that’s also intensely, weirdly horny. like the lucifer crowley dog stuff in s11. actually meg literally makes ruby wear a dog collar with a little tag that says like, “ruby. if found, please call 666 and return to owner (meg).” i cannot stress enough that this is just STUPID horny for NO reason. you guys know what i mean. it’s basically sorority hazing but up to eleven because demons, and also forever. also meg makes ruby kiss her hand at least once. or like no she makes her kiss her boot. i am having too much fun i’ve gotten distracted.

- ruby finds out sam is alive and immediately ditches. like she just fucks off to nowhere and they can’t figure out where she went. anyway this samruby reunion takes place like, before the first episode definitely, maybe a few months.

- i do like @lesbiansamwinchester‘s thing where ruby tries very hard to be sam’s moral compass but also imo she fucks up, very bad, and a lot. and soulless sam can’t really catch her at it so they end up doing a lot of very fucked shit actually. but she tries very hard because she cares about sam and she wants him to think well of himself y’know. and she wants to be someone who sam would think was worth following.

- re: that last point. many thoughts. head full.

- when sam and dean finally see each other again ruby is there and dean is like what the FUCK. like he did see that she betrayed lucifer for sam at the last minute but also he hates her and doesn’t trust her, and he actually kind of suspects that whatever’s wrong with sam might actually be HER fault. 

- this post is relevant.

- okay but i’ve decided that the cas/meg kiss DOES in fact happen in this au because i do kind of love it and also more importantly, with the addition of the insane meg being ruby’s shitty ex vibe that i am jamming into this au with both hands, it is just. chefkiss. ruby and dean look at each other in horror while sam is just like huh? i’m sorry but imagine being ruby and being forced to watch your horrible ex get kissed dommily by castiel. god this is funny i love this. again this is all in subtext because we are imagining cw censors and i’ve used up my one allotted gay kiss for the season by having anna make out with a random woman at an orgy to prove that all angels are degenerate pansexual hedonists, you know. (is this homophobic enough for the cw? i hope so!) also: an orgy which balthazar organized and cas refused to attend, to be clear. 

- dean is actually garbage enough about the whole ruby thing that sam and ruby fuck off by themselves for a good while like, maybe three or four episodes, leaving dean alone or sometimes with cas. during this time dean gets a little bit involved with the angel revolutionaries.

- anyway when sam gets his soul back he’s like, torn, between dean and ruby. he feels guilty for how he behaved towards and thought about dean but he would ALSO feel guilty just kicking ruby to the curb.

- HOWEVER when he gets his soulless memories back he does kick her to the curb because she has done some REALLY fucked up shit while trying to be his moral compass like she is BAD at it.

- once ruby is left all alone in the world, guess who shows up in a flutter of wings and ambiguity! it’s anna! 

- she is here to ask ruby if she wants to spy on hell for the angel revolution. ruby accepts because everyone else hates her right now. if anna wants to take her in under cas’ banner (and not tell the winchesters because they’re technically on the same side but what’s a little subterfuge between friends) ruby will take it.

- ruby and anna DO get to have some fun agent runner/agent lesbian subtext, as a treat! at least when anna isn’t busy eating food out of lisa braeden’s fridge like villanelle and other nuts things. 

- like i do wanna be clear anna just. appears in lisa braeden’s kitchen, slowly, wordlessly eats her leftovers while staring her down, and then flies away. this contributes to lisa’s impending mental breakdown. MY season six is about the madness of the suburban housewife, among many other various things.

- also i want to be clear that raphael’s side is actually like, funneling weapons to the lucifer loyalist demons to try and get them to defeat crowley but it’s all very hush hush, like, raphael would NOT want his underlings to know that he has organized this, like, they can barely stand to work with naomi. the fact that raphael had naomi organize help for DEMONS is unthinkable. anyway it’s basically celestial iran-contra.

- ruby is actually one of the last people to stick by cas even when like, anna and balthazar are betraying him, because like. whomst among us has never wanted to become god a little. and also, ruby is weak to authority figures we KNOW this she might be down to accept cas as her heavenly father a little, she’s NOT a rebel. but most importantly she sticks by him because, you know, i love sam and he’s mad at me for kinda betraying him and you [REDACTED] dean and he’s mad at you for kinda betraying him like we’re all winchester derangement syndrome patients here, and also like. i get it. sometimes they don’t know what’s good for them. sometimes in order to love you have to betray a little bit.

- ruby doesn’t turn on cas until he breaks sam’s wall. but by then it’s too late and there’s nothing she can do really.

- the parallel where it was dean who stabbed ruby in lucifer rising and it’s sam who stabs cas in the man who knew too much is actually intentional this time and WAY more aggressive. actually there are tons of cas-ruby parallels. i think meg should call ruby a whore like one episode before crowley calls cas a whore just to hammer it home. i think the thing where soulless sam runs away from dean’s judgement and is running around with ruby while dean is sulking about it but also running around with cas is super aggressively obvious. god i love that ruby’s existence makes it super obvious that cas is dean’s [REDACTED]. that’s so fun. 

- this has been an intensely hypertextual romp and it’s apparently nearly fifteen hundred words, good god. anyway, special thanks to @lesbiansamwinchester, @pietacastiel, and @seragamble, all of whom brainstormed with me

#spn #good s6 au

[houseboatisland]

James Under a Cloud

October 1926

"They can't expect us to go out in that, surely?" Henry murmured in the darkness.

The engines looked up, listening. The rain drummed relentlessly down on the shed roof, and permeated through the various vents to come smattering and splashing on the concrete floor. The enginemen hustled and complained absentmindedly to one another. Occasionally a wry remark about drowning or swimming was made. The familiar raggedy tarpaulins and wire were soon dragged in from the Shed Stores, the best protection they'd have against rain swirling between cabs and tenders.

"I'm afraid so, Henry," sighed Edward. Henry imagined Edward speaking the words with a surrendered smile.

"Of course he'd be the first to whinge and moan about it," sniffed James. Next to him, Gordon gave a single harrumph of warning, and James seemed to momentarily shrink where he sat!

"...Anyway," the little red engine went on, after he had recovered, "Trains gotta keep running, business as usual and all that. The Fat Director won't let us just sit about and let some submarines pull the trucks and the coaches and things, isn't that right?"

"He certainly would be above letting them feed cows in fields, too," intoned Gordon, and Henry gave a single, drawn out wheeze of laughter.

"Shaddup! 'S'not funny!" hissed James, to no avail.

"So much for a new shed bringing us all together," Edward chuckled, rolling his eyes.

"It is funny, then!" Henry grew bolder with every syllable, "I would've pictured this weather being more to your liking than any other kind!"

"Wot? And why's that, then?"

"Your brakes won't catch fire in the rain, will they?!"

"OHHHHhhh, you big, blue--!"

Henry was already slinking out for the first train of the day. Gordon's booming laughter threatened to shake the slates clean off the roof, and let the rain soak them all to the tubes. Edward could only bite his lip and hope the light from the doors didn't expose the look on his smokebox. Even the railwaymen seemed to have cheered up at the spectacle.

"Hate to eh, put a damper on fings," James' driver smirked around his cigarette, "But eh, we'd better get a move on. The yard's well flooded with trucks--"

"Ooohhhergh, just get on with it!" groaned his engine, and nothing more was said.

James advanced cautiously through the doors, and before they had even reached the Coaling Stage, he was drenched from the funnel to the rails.

"Ergh, for Pete's sake!" he spat, as the rain streamed down his face. The blowing wind meant that the canopy built to hold back coal dust was futile to shielding him from the downpour. The fireman was a shimmering green blob in his rainslicker as he pitched cartload after cartload of coal from above into the tender. James wondered if a stay in the tunnel was so bad after all.

The fireman hopped back into the cab, the contained heat from the fire helping to dry him.

"Right, now let's get to squaring away those trucks."

James growled, blinking the rain from his eyes as they navigated the sundry points and curves down into the yard.

The yard was still quite new and well looked after, but already the day's cloudburst seemed to be taking its toll. The deepening puddles sat an inch or so above the rails in some places. Further down the sidings, the trucks squirmed pitifully as the water reached well up to the spokes in their wheels. James briefly felt sorry for them, until he remembered that they were why he was out here in the first place.

James coasted among the trucks as his crew peered out for the ones they were wanting. The red engine felt a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. The water on the tyres of his wheels felt... fun. He found himself looking forward to every next wheel turn. At last they set upon four miserable looking trucks of coal, which were meant to be at the front of their intended train when everything was said and done.

A shunter hobbled out of gloom, looking like a shepherd with his pole and red lamp. He snatched the couplings on the first truck with James, and then waved at the engine's crew.

"C'mon, you," snorted James, but without any malice in it. The trucks, instinctively comforted by the presence of an engine to lead them, hopefully to a dry place, whimpered and followed him obediently.

Once James and these four had reversed, they descended again into the sidings for the next ones. James very nearly giggled as they dove in, and the trucks couldn't help but find his new confidence infectious. It became a sort of game, pulling back and then freewheeling back into the fan of lines, (as much as the driver would let them, anyhow,) as the water was stirred to spray up and away from their sides. The trucks were soon besides themselves with laughter, and James by now was too!

"Fancy being a submarine, do you?" remarked his driver, only half-annoyed.

But neither James nor the trucks heard him as the rain continued to belt down, and James even shouted "G'bye!" as he was uncoupled to fetch a brake van.

#ttte #ttte james #ttte henry #ttte edward #ttte gordon #houseboat's writing

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. ok im sorry you cannot post that thanatos and daphne panel and not tell me that isnt just hxp with hades painted a different color. thats like insulting bad in how lazy the art as become. also thats not how a kiss works, where did his mouth go?

2. i dont care if an artist draws their characters nude and w/ greek gods its kinda expected but its a purposely put in design feature and characterization and plot point in LO that persephone is barely legal with her age always being emphasized, is constantly sexualized without her knowledge esp by hades, and looks so young w/ several times of her just being naked while possible being a minor. like no wonder people get creeped out by LO even at first glance, that IS weird no matter how you cut it.

3. webtoon creators making nsfw work of their comics is not an issue lmao the problem in rachel's case is most of it is overwhelming about persephone being submissive and confused and even having hades call her a "little girl" and having it as the logo??? like if its behind a paywall thats one thing, but just cutting off the lower part and having it in print where kids can see it and disguising the context is disgusting. its not right, but i can see why some have some concerns about RS's character.

4. i know if it happens it wont be for awhile but god, the webtoons batman comic they put up is already up LO's butt and steadily climbing. If it actually pushes LO off it's top spot i'll be so happy. Not the hero we deserve but the hero we need. (PS its a good comic too, go read it even if you're not a DC fan!)

5. the LO porn rachel made wasnt even good lmao like a lot of was just uncomfortable to look at bc only hades seemed to be enjoying it and the other half just seemed traced from actual tumblr porn gifs so it just looked even weirder with her cartoon faces, like it was just weird? anyway congrats to rachel to somehow making even 4chan think she's gross. they literally invented bronies and even think that is weird.

6. I went to check out the reviews for the LO book preorder and they're all so funny to me because it's just so fake????? Tell me who the hell would call this story a delicacy. I'm not joking. One of the reviews literally calls it that.

I hate it. Anyway. Punderworld volume 1 is available to buy so buy that instead of LO y'all

7. fr the more i learn about the most popular creators on webtoons (not just rachel but ppl like the ladies behind lets play and age matters and basically all of the romance genre) the more im convinced being a straight white lady rots your brain. yall stay safe out there because none of you will be seeing the gates of heaven ✋🏾😷 

-----FP Spoilers-----

8. Making Themis pregnant made lo and mythology timline dont much up, bc themis was one of zeus's first wife(i think second) but bc their kids were looking undesireble he break up with her, but didnt mistreat her like metis, but he gave her this job as a law goddes, and later marry hera. So if she is pregnant and she have only kids with zeus this would mean that he and hera would be couple for not too long, but their kids are older and in flashbacks it was shown that hera was his first choice.

9. The reason actually Law gods/goddesses are gone is cause reasonable people with any kind of morals will be against Persephone. Even if they're getting paid by the richest guy in the world to defend her.   Only those who have not only drank the HXP Kool aid, but have downed an entire bowl of it through a funnel like a sorority girl at a frat party will be allowed to defend her. As is right of course. No contrary opinions about HXP are allowed in LO, lest you be labeled a villain by our Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss Queen and her Mansplain Manipulate Manwhore King. All Hail HXP. #Asspollo

10. um im sorry, even ignoring how dumb of an excuse "maternity leave" is bc shes a goddess why would they need time off, but like??? you really mean to tell me it wouldnt be badass to show a working mom bring her baby to work to defeat zeus at this own game??? like wouldnt that be actually feminist and show the power of women?? rachel sucks so bad at being "progressive".

From OP, not anon: Themis is currently pregnant.

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

[see-arcane]

In the End

The Archivist and Terminus have a chat as the last of the multiverse dies out.

About death and its requirements.

About fear.

And about what comes after The End.

The Archivist had seen it coming. Had tried to warn, to shout, to cajole, to take the reins for himself.

And failed, naturally.

The knife had come and killed him awhile. Long enough to unhook the Fears from a single Earth and funnel down into an infinity of greater meals. The Web, victorious. Shocking no one and nothing.

The Archivist had come back, naturally.

Martin Blackwood had been relieved enough to congeal again, no longer a dissolving mound of mist. He’d feared his love gone for good. Foolish of him.

The Eye had refused to forfeit its favorite soldier even in his infancy as the Archivist. It would have gutted Terminus with its stare if it’d dared to steal him at the height of his evolution, the precious Pupil of the Ceaseless Watcher.

Not that The End had put up much fight when he was snatched away. The man had been mildly promising once upon a time, back when he’d balanced on the edge between martyrdom and a fear of death. Sadly, the latter had disappeared ages ago and left him an unappetizing un-meal. Hardly worth more than a few mundane drops of mourning for loved ones and strangers lost. More the Lonely’s domain than its own.

Again, no loss.

No more than the Web’s latest scheme was. The Extinction groused only a little, sour at the Archivist’s ruined attempt to turn the world and its Fears over to its young maw. But it took after The End, and knew it was simply a matter of patience. All things were for them.

Time came. Dimensions and the fruit of fresh worlds came with it.

The Archivist had been right, naturally.

Oh, he fought it, of course. Him and his love, now so much paler at having to see the results of his and his comrades’ choice in person. Guilt atop horror atop misery in a constant piling of wretched internal layers. They tried to stave it off on worlds without number.

They failed all of them. Every last one.

It was on the thirtieth buffet of mortal neuroses that the Archivist cracked. Over another doomed plan of action? Another dead world? Something like that. Something which broke the dry twig of his love and patience over his knee as he whirled on Martin Blackwood’s latest supplication that he was sorry, so sorry Jon, but he couldn’t get behind just mowing this whole world down..!

“We never would have had to if you’d listened. If any of you had listened. If any of you had cared about anything or anyone beyond what was in your immediate line of sight. But no! This was the choice we just had to land on! A whole multiverse fed to torture and an excruciating death or to a blip of horror and a quick ending! That’s it! That’s all! The fucking end, Martin!”

The Eye had lit up like Christmas as it observed the ensuing fireworks. Likewise for the Lonely. And the Web, of course. One never knew what kind of emotional leverage there might be to use against them later. But then, that was moot as well. What more was there to win when all of Existence was in one’s grasp?

The End wouldn’t say. No more than it would take only a meager gulp of satisfaction from their ex-human tagalongs when Martin Blackwood shut himself away in the Lonely and the Archivist locked himself in the last crumbling chamber of the Panopticon, his hated throne room. It had tasted and feared like an Ending.

It wasn’t, naturally.

Less than a century later and they were back together. So it went on and off as the Fears ate their way through eons and space. Together a stretch, a burst of rage, a parting, a return. Ad infinitum.

At least until ‘infinitum’ ran out. Which it did.

It was almost funny how it happened.

The Fears consumed their latest frightened world, licked their chops, and prepared to move on to the next…

…only for the Eye to announce there was no next. No other. No more.

All the worlds were gone.

The Archivist had slipped into one of his greatest rounds of lunacy by that point. As liable to laugh as to scream. When he registered the Web’s realization he erupted into a fit of such malicious and wild cackling it ruptured his throat twice. Breathless, he still wheezed madly on the stone floor, the Eye delighted right along with him, weeping tears of hateful joy in a salty rain.

The End waited as the Extinction went to work on the bulk of their sibling-limbs. It was slow business, but quite satisfactory. Slashing and glutting and radiating tumorous glee as the Archivist cheered in his disintegrating chamber. His attention was split between this vision and that of the Web, scrabbling desperately at itself, trying to be singular, to scurry away, to conjure some trick or design that would make reality bow to suit its desire one last time—

The Archivist shrilled his ecstasy into a void that even the Vast could no longer claim—the Titan had expired already—as the Mother of Puppets gave a voiceless pleading shriek when The End rolled over it. Crushing it into nothing like a great vaporous stone.

And then it was down to them.

Death and the last thing alive.

Waiting.

Waiting.

Waiting.

The Archivist had to die for The End to be done, naturally.

No life capable of fearing death could exist before it could turn on itself in perfect completion. The Archivist knew this and was quite eager to accept its metaphoric scythe. He hovered in the vacuum, patient and ready.

Which turned out to be the problem.

It was either days or years or millennia later that he finally heaved a sigh and suggested, “...I could just do it myself if you gave me a weapon. A knife. A gun. Poison. Perhaps a sharp rock.”

The End had no mouth to speak with. Even so, the Archivist understood when it thought with those rudimentary cogs of its mind:

Inconsequential. You must be afraid.

“I think you’ll have to make an exception. This is kind of it, isn’t it? Nothing left to fight for. Nothing left to fear.”

There is always something to fear.

The Archivist hummed and scratched at the colorless field of his beard. All his hair had gone chalk white. His formerly all-Seeing eyes were milky. Even so, he met the space where Terminus’ gaze would have been, had it possessed a face.

“If there is, it isn’t you. You ate everybody that could have cared or been cared about. Everyone and everything that could have been afraid. It’s all gone. Martin went...what? 1,010 years ago?”

Yes. When the Lonely died. That is something to fear. You may not see him again when you die. There may be nothing beyond me but nothing. Fear that.

The Archivist waved his scarred hands around at the featureless gulf.

“Oh, you mean like all this lovely scenery, except with the mercy of not having any consciousness to register it? How dreadful. I’m past that, Terminus. I’m past just about everything. …Though I did get a laugh out of the Web.”

Yes. The deaths of the powerful are always most pleasing. When they realize there is no force or fortune that can save them it is particularly heady.

“Was.”

What?

“Was particularly heady. Everything’s past tense now. It always will be after this. A record for no one to come across again.”

Yes. A frightening prospect.

“A saddening one.”

A frustrating one.

“Look, I’m trying, alright? I’m kind of burned out on any kind of feeling these days what with losing the entire multiverse to your gluttony.”

The reality beyond Hill Top Road still exists. What if I find it again? What if I squeeze through?

The Archivist offered a look that, in an avatar of its own some eras prior, would have killed with the amount of venom in it. This was not to say it was a hateful look. Just one that withered in its bald disinterest.

“The Door is locked to that place. Even if it wasn’t?” The Archivist shrugged. “They’d die without you anyway. Hell, with as long as it’s been, it’s probably some barren environmental hellscape already. A blighted wasteland of plastic and radioactivity. All of the people already gone or limping their way to the grave.”

The Archivist’s look muted. Softening as it read the last of the Fear’s un-expression. The End flattened its thoughts down to mindless silence. It didn’t help.

“...I’m sorry about the Extinction.”

You lie.

“You didn’t want to lose it. It was separate enough from you to be more than a limb. I Knew you weren’t happy to see it dissolve once it took out the Eye. Once it was just us. By then I’d run pretty low on things to spend my last crumbs of empathy on, so—there you go. ‘I’m sorry for the loss of your child.’”

It died doing what it loved, if things like us could love. It returned to me happily.

The Archivist looked at The End with as much fractured concern as he could muster. It wasn’t much, but it was there.

'…Thank you for your condolences.’

Another span of quiet. An hour? A month? Did it matter? Eventually:

“How are you meant to do it, anyway?”

Kill you?

“Kill you. Wouldn’t you have to be afraid to consume yourself? Do an ouroboros trick?”

Yes. I will be afraid when that time comes. I do not know what waits for me either. A psychopomp does not live in Death, only plays escort.

“Well, if you can stomach the burden of not taking in any fear calories while ending me, I promise to shout the answer to you in the afterlife. If there is one.”

That is not how this works. You know it.

“Again, I can’t help it. I’m tired. I’m ready. I can, I don’t know, be upset, if that’s what you need. Miserable, even. I can scream and beg and work up a few tears. It can look like fear.”

A stone painted like a meal is not a meal. I cannot consume you until you cease being a stone. I cannot end until you are gone. We are paralyzed, Archivist.

“Figures.”

Time passed. It didn’t matter how much. They hovered beside each other. Waiting, waiting, waiting.

“Why?”

Why what?

“Why do I have to go first? I’m clearly never going to be as appetizing as you want, but I’ll still die with you. You’re the last Fear sustaining me. You go, I go. So why not start eating yourself? I’ll snuff out too.”

If Terminus had eyes, they might have rolled.

I am The End, not The Penultimate. Nor even The Tie. I must go last. The cap to all Fear of Death.

“But that’s already happened, hasn’t it?”

…Explain.

“You know what I mean. If the last things capable of fearing death have already died, then that means your job is already done. Considering your present company,” he gestured to himself, “I’d say you’ve filled your quota. No more fear of death means you get to retire. Right?”

The End considered this. It felt plausible. More or less. Yet there was something in this not-quite-ending that felt crooked in some way. Like a specific shape trying to force its way through an imperfect exit.

“Well?”

It is wrong. My fear is wrong.

“Morally speaking?”

I have no morality.

“Mm.”

The fear I possess is the wrong one. Why is it there?

“What do you mean? Getting cold feet?”

I am the cold, I do not feel it.

“And you have no feet, right, I get it. But you do take my meaning? It’s a bit hypocritical, the essence of the Grim Reaper suddenly realizing how little it wants to die.”

Wrong. I possess fear of myself and that is correct. The fear I possess with it is wrong.

The Archivist assumed the best curious posture he could while adrift in weightless un-space. Hands clasped, head forward, posed for a desk. All he needed was a tape recorder.

“How so?”

This has never happened before. Our kind was singular. A product of the pocket dimension we hailed from. An aberration. I now have all the mass that my sibling-selves once were. When I End the End, it will be as you say. Consumption of the only remaining self until all is gone. So it was always going to be. So it must still be. I cannot deny my final function, only postpone it. All of Fear will be gone.

“Tragic.”

No. Unprecedented. Once all of Fear is gone, there will be a vacuum. A hollow where our matter has always Been. It seemed a simple fact until the reality of it approached. No different from mist disappearing on a heavy breeze.

“…But that would imply the Fears still existed as that mist like a phase of some nightmare water cycle. Except they can’t, because they’re all dead and devoured in you. The ‘matter’ is all still here. Still you.”

Not mist. Not a serpent that may eat itself out of existence. In the end, Fear is its own matter. Matter cannot disappear.

“Only convert. Sounds like the Extinction’s getting in its posthumous digs. Is that what’s worrying you? That there won’t be an end to The End, but…oh.”

Eye or no, Terminus knew the Archivist could see it. Fractionally, anyway.

The Fears will end, because I will end. But there will be something else left behind.

“Which is antithetical to your gimmick. Right. How very unfortunate. Can’t imagine what it must be like being forced to inflict a change that disgusts and horrifies you to the core of yourself. If it makes you feel any better, and I hope it doesn’t, you’re just as likely to birth a new pantheon of horrors. Circle of life and all that. It’d keep in theme with the everything-is-always-horrible streak we’ve had so far.”

Do you really believe that, Archivist?

“I’d believe it sooner than anything else. Don’t you?”

I do not know what to believe. I am afraid. Of ending. Of starting. I never wanted to begin anything. It is wrong.

“Well. That’s the upside of death, isn’t it? Once you’re gone, you don’t have to care.” The Archivist stared past The End in what may have been the direction of the dimension he’d been torn from. Flushed down and out and away on the Fears’ tide, leaving behind a single Fearless world in a not-quite-infinity of doomed worlds. He sighed. “Out of sight, out of mind.”

…You do not wish to see what happens? What is born of Death’s death?

“Oh, in the usual damning Pandora fashion, sure. I’m curious. But not enough to want to stick around in your offspring’s company, whatever it turns out to be.”

You do not lie.

“Why does that matter—,” The Archivist saw. The Archivist knew. The Archivist cursed. “Oh, you petty eldritch shit.”

The End was Ending itself. Devouring its reality with a speed born of impatience. What the humanity of ancient times might have compared to ripping off a bandage to have the pain of it done. It was glad. It was terrified.

The Archivist watched because there was nothing else to do but wait for his turn.

The End had adopted him as much as the Extinction and the Eye had several realities back. Back when he’d started the culling routine, much to his love’s distress. The Web had only half-hidden its own disappointment. Yes, there was plenty of chattel to feast on, but it took so much fun out of it when the meal was dumped into the trash after barely a nibble. It’d at least forced the Fears to savor things a little more on the other side of the myriad Doors, knowing that the Archivist would have his hand on the kill switch the second they dropped in.

Yes, The End had stamped him gladly. Now that it was nearly gone, the Archivist’ pseudo-eternity would end with it. Perhaps he would finally age. Perhaps he’d simply blink off. Maybe the thing that was growing into the space Terminus left behind would swat him like a fly. All he could do was wait and see.

It certainly looked impressive, whatever it was. The Fears had been colorful in their way. Ugly hues of blood and pus, fire and shadow, space and silk. Their replacement was coming in more like an aurora borealis if it were spun into gauze.

“Really would be just our luck if we got another spider,” the Archivist huffed, wishing for the umpteenth time that Martin Blackwood was there to reply. He did hope to see the man on the other side, once he crossed over. Stranger things had happened.

A strange thing was happening in front of him.

He’d finally recognized what the new arrival reminded him of. It was a sight that had fascinated him as a child on one of those long recesses when he’d wander off to the edges of the playground rather than subject himself to the fact that no one wanted him in their games. He’d come across a cocoon being made. It hadn’t looked as elegantly transformative as the butterfly clip in one of the nature videos the teacher showed on Fridays. Really, it’d looked like eating cotton candy in reverse. He’d checked the cocoon every recess since, reading up on the hows and whys and whats of moths.

They spent their whole caterpillar lives eating, eating, eating, just to prepare themselves for transformation. With all that energy, they shrouded themselves in silk and came free as the resultant moths, living only to mate and produce. Even at that age, the Archivist had been increasingly aware of how uninterested he was in the latter business. Still, the life cycle itself was intriguing: a spree of consumption followed by metamorphosis and completion beyond any other need.

His recess moth had turned out to be a British burnet; quite common, but lovely in its spots.

As this antique memory came to him, the Archivist saw the last vestige of The End consume itself. He felt its presence in him evaporate. A battery torn out of the soul. Relief hovered at the edges of him for a single instant.

Which was, of course, the exact moment the cocoon burst open.

Jon went blind in the flash of it. His once-godly vision fried to bubbling jelly as a burning rainbow erupted in all directions, searing away the murk of the metaphysical vacuum. There was time enough in that millisecond for the honest melodrama of a single thought—I am glad I got to see it.—before he went deaf as well.

A blare of sound that was a rush, a hum, a trumpeting note from some single unimaginable instrument of beauty, destroying his ears in a musical howl. At least he couldn’t hear his scream ruining the song. So the Archivist remained for several heartbeats, sightless and soundless and sent tumbling away in the blast like debris in a whirlwind.

Then he hit velvet. A huge heavy wall of it that caught him in its shag and towed him back. As he was pulled, a pleasant buzz snuck behind his eyes and eardrums. The buzz fluttered in on tiny tickling wings, clearing away his fresh handicaps until he could see and hear all of what had caught him. Or nearly all.

Even with the Eye’s senses to observe or the Vast’s measurements to compare, he doubted he could ever take in the full scale of what had shed Death’s husk. There was simply too much of it up close. It grew closer as its forelimb pulled him level with one of its eyes.

Not one of the eyes on its wings, though those were colossal staring pools as well. He was brought to one of the two round jewels set in the head.

In the insect world, it might have qualified as a compound eye. A trillion infinitesimal panes of perception, each its own eye, collaborating with their iridescent neighbors to focus on the tiny primate in the entity’s hold. Said entity released a new low note without the proper mouth for it—a soft tidal wave of lullaby-sound that brought cooing parents bent over weeping children to mind. Which was fair.

Much to the Archivist’ embarrassment, he was weeping.

Weeping because he knew what this new manifestation was telling him it was. Radiating what it did.

Weeping because he could not make himself believe it. Couldn’t dare, for dread that he would wake up from some last hopeful delusion fed to him by a dream or a Fear, just to rip it away.

“Gerry said you weren’t real,” he tried to laugh. The words croaked too much. “You can’t be real now. Not after all of this. How can you be?”

Egg. Hatch. Eat. Grow. Eat. March. Eat. Change. Change was fearful. Change was terrible. Change could not be stopped.

The Archivist wanted to put his head in his hands. He found he didn’t have the strength or desire to stop looking into that gleaming amalgam eye.

“…Always wondered if caterpillars knew what they were doing when they started wrapping themselves up. I always hoped it was just instinct. That they knew what they were doing.”

All change is frightening, for good or ill. The child dies to make the adult. Earthbound dies to make the winged. Destroyer dies to make the Creator. The Fear could not fight its own compulsion. The Fear was afraid. Had to cannibalize. The End was afraid. Had to commit horror of birth. To seed antithesis of Fear. Apotheosis. Yes?

“Yes. I want so badly to say yes. I want you to be real. I want it to matter that you’re real. But it’s all dead, don’t you see? Everyone and everything.” His eyes ran again. Breath broke into hot shrapnel as his chest hitched. “Even in a daydream I can’t imagine you unless you happened too late.”

I exist without the permission of your murdered hope, Jonathan Sims. Reality persists with or without faith. What I was has eaten its fill. A trundling mass of dread and annihilation. It died to become its opposite. In all respects.

The velvet limb pulled away to allow him a clearer view of the wings. Though he could not make out their furthest ends, he saw them stretch. Mirrored planes of uncountable eyes in prismatic tones, all crinkling with unseen smiles, wider, wider, preparing for liftoff.

“What happens now? Do I die?”

Someday. Most things do. But there is no End in me, Jonathan Sims. I am complete and so exist only to do one thing.

The wings were as wide as they could be, reaching from one edge of infinity to the next, roiling in kaleidoscopic glory, watching him watch them.

Make new life.

The wings slammed together.

Another detonation of color and sound. This one so great it erased him in its blast. The void as well. Likewise the dead dimensions and silent worlds inside them. Erased time and space and matter as it knew itself and then…

“…And then?”

“And that’s where it stopped.”

“Bit anticlimactic, don’t you think?”

“Yes, well, I’ll be sure to take it up with the writers next time I nod off. Personally, I blame your new herbal tea selection. I thought it tasted a bit ‘recreational’ the other night.”

“Oh, like you’d know.”

“I could.”

“Mmhmm. So, was this your subconscious going out of its way to veto my tarantula terrarium suggestion?”

“How do you mean?”

“Evil Eldritch Spider and Friends get their comeuppance from Nice Magic Mothra. Oh, and also I’m dead in that scenario. Very nice.”

“That was obviously the nightmare bit of it. God, most of it was. Just this huge weight of horror and misery dragging out into forever. It felt real. Like I lived through every second of those eons. Like I mourned you for that last pointless age as the Fear died out…”

“Jon, hey, I wasn’t serious—,”

“But it felt real. So goddamn real. All that pain and death, and you were gone—,”

“Hey. Hey, come here.”

“It was an actual constant Hell down to that last scene. A marathon of things always changing for the worst. And those—those things, all laughing at us as we tried to do anything to make it better when we knew there was nothing, no way to help. On and on like that. Forever. Most of forever.”

“I’m sorry. I should’ve woken you up. I heard you talking in your sleep, but I didn’t realize it was like that. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. We both sleep like rocks. Last night was just an extremely unpleasant fluke. Minus the Magic Moth.”

“Of course.”

“That said, I don’t think it had anything to do with us getting a pet bug.”

“Arachnid.”

“Mm. If it was just that, I’m sure I’d have had a dream about the Captain doing battle Godzilla-style with your evil, evil tarantula.”

“Ugh, probably. God knows she brings in enough birds. My poor Mexican redknee wouldn’t last a day. I’ll just have to make do with the garden spiders.”

“They cause trouble for most spiders, you know.”

“What does?”

“Moths. The bigger ones. All that dust on their wings is just scales. It lets them get loose from the webbing, or, if they’re large enough, they can beat their wings until the threads break apart. Spiders have to unhook them or risk losing the whole web. And then there’s fact that they’re incredibly toxic. Poisonous to just about any predator that makes the mistake of chowing down.”

“…Are you sure this wasn’t a roundabout campaign from your subconscious to start raising moths? Because the Captain wouldn’t be deterred by having a bunch of flying targets zooming around.”

“No. I’m happy with the ones in the wild too. At this point I think I’m more ready to break down and get—,”

“Oh, say it. Please say it.”

“—a dog. If only to even the playing field with the Captain.”

“A spaniel. We’ll name them Moth.”

“Ambassador Moth.”

They carried on this way for several minutes before the Captain wriggled her way into Jon’s lap, demanding her tithe of attention. The tithe was paid and the plates were cleared. Sunlight clung to them in a golden sheet through the windows, their patter interrupted by the usual arguments of birdsong from the trees. Though they hadn’t spotted it yet, last night’s storm had petered out at just the right angle to produce a rainbow of postcard brilliance above the sunrise.

Similar storms had been weathered in similar worlds. Rainbows flew their banners there too.

Somewhere higher, further than the rim of any universe, flitting in a place beyond that did not quite exist, a sea of eyes looked on.

Joyous and forever.

NO END

Ao3 link

#be warned: 9/10ths of this thing is going to Hurt+ #but I promise the last 10th is very very worth it #jonathan sims #the archivist #the end #terminus #the fears #the magnus archives #storytime #my writing

[ill-be-istj-if-no-one-else-is]

why do you get annoyed with high ti users? out of curiosity

.A couple tendencies that are common in high Ti users are really annoying to Te users in general and me in particular:

At their core Te and Ti are at odds. This comic covers the Ti tendency to try to come up with the general, works for every possible scenario even if not relevant solution - which in and of itself is fine except like in the comic they also don’t pass you the salt before they start trying to solve the problem. Te strives for “appropriate for achieving the stated objective within the relevant context”; Ti strives for “achieves the stated objective under a wide range of scenarios or even all scenarios” and there is a time and place for the latter (programming, theoretical sciences) but like, in every day life? not much of one. So this is why Ti irritates me in academic and professional contexts. In the worst cases, you also get TPs who will hold that if something can’t be done perfectly logically, or if a rule itself is not perfectly logical, there’s no point. Which for the latter is kind of true but like...my job requires government paperwork. It’s stupid. I know it’s stupid. You still have to do it and if you don’t do it bad things happen. The fact that it’s stupid does not fix the problem.

Basically: I understand that “because I said so” or “because it’s the rules” is not a very satisfying answer but if you are not a literal child I expect people to be able to comprehend that sometimes it is the only true answer and deal accordingly (by which I mean do the thing while striving to change it if that’s possible) Some Ti users do not deal accordingly.

More generally, in social situations, there are a couple things among Ti users that I don’t like. Fortunately the people I know well in real life are like, normal adults who have learned how to act maturely but this happens online a lot and with people I don’t know well.

1. Deliberately trying to get a rise out of people. This is stupid; fuck off. Fortunately on the internet you can just block them (pro tip to high Fi users: stop arguing with Ti users. Just give a noncommittal answer or block them. They want a reaction. Don’t provide it.)

2.”Um, actually”/”Well, technically” behaviors or adding information that is not relevant to the point being made simply because they happen to know it. This does not make you look smarter; it makes you look like you have no capacity to understand context or assess things for relevance. There’s a parable in Jewish teachings (Pirkei Avot/Chapters of the Fathers for those wondering) about different kinds of learners - the funnel, who learns quickly but forgets quickly; the strainer, who remembers trivial items but not the core points; the sponge, who absorbs everything but can’t distinguish between good or bad; and the sifter, who retains what is important but discards what is not. A lot of Ti users have real sponge tendencies. Which is fine as a personal trait but also the Ti-Fe desire for validation (see next point) sometimes mixes with this to create the toxic fumes of telling it to me, which is just the worst. You know that guy in a lecture who has “not a question, really more of an observation?” That’s Ti. (To be clear: know it all behaviors do exist in a lot of people regardless of type but Ti amplifies it).

3. I don’t really have an internal need for validation from people I don’t know. It’s just not a thing I have - I care what my friends think about me, and I don’t want people on the whole to think I’m acting against the values I hold important - I would hate for someone to think I’m bigoted or deliberately cruel - but like, beyond that? Whatever. Anyway this also means, and this is totally my fault but also it’s unlikely to change, that it’s really irritating to me when other people are clearly trying to get a reaction of any sort. The part about getting a rise is the most annoying but also desperately trying for my approval is weird. Like we don’t know each other. Why would you want that. So that’s sort of a barrier that I struggle with for the entire Ti-Fe axis but that’s the main thing that irritates me about Fe users whereas it’s one of three major things for high Ti users.

It’s also funny because this is by no means the first time I’ve said I find high Ti users (or Ti-Fe users) annoying compared to people on the Te-Fi axis, and every time someone is like “but I’m not annoying” or “I would think that MBTI would make you more open-minded” and it’s like I don’t know you? I’m an internet stranger? I just said I’m outright repelled by people I don’t know personally thinking my approval is something they should be seeking let alone be entitled to and so now I’ve gone from “people of your type are more likely to annoy me” to “you are actively annoying me right now by doing the exact thing I said was annoying”. It’s like a negative feedback loop.

I should note: my sister is an ISTP and I get along with her, and I’ve had and still have plenty of friends with high Ti. It’s not a case of “I automatically hate all xxTPs”; it’s a case of “99% of the time when someone has irritated me to the point of me having to fight back the urge to scream or commit violence, it has been a high Ti user”. It’s also specifically irritation/annoyance, not like, genuine hatred which I try to save for people who do actual morally repugnant things and which isn’t really tied to type.

#mbti #this was very cathartic to write out #Anonymous