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#GOD I NEED TO STOP WATCHING SHOWS BECAUSE MY FUN LITTLE MINDLESS ACTIVITY HAS TURNED INTO A CONSTANT NEED TO CRANK OUT MASSIVE TEXT POSTS
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EIGHTH SENSE THEORY
(content warning: I will be referencing suicide attempts and vomit in this post)
I saw other people speculating that Episode 6 might be some sort of medication misuse psychotic break on JaeWon's part and honestly? Having just watched it. I definitely think this man is hallucinating.
I'm not entirely sure if this was something that came from the nature of watching this episode not on Viki, but so much of the episode seemed too bright, too blurry. The way the light hit the JiHyun's white jacket made it look like he was reflecting light, like he was heavenly or angelic in a way.
Like when they are in the car in the beginning:
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Or eating on the bench:
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Or arriving at the beach:
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And something I noticed while watching these scenes, admittedly coming in to it having already seen discussions of a possible mental break, is that JaeWon rarely makes eye contact with JiHyun and they do not physically touch until 12 minutes into the episode.
Not until we have seen them walk up the stairs once already.
First set of stairs:
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Second set of stairs:
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But crucially here, it's windy, and JiHyun is gripping JaeWon in a way that might equate the force you feel from a strong wind.
Other hints that JaeWon might be hallucinating?
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Same food order at the same time, something cute if they actually did that, but something that could also be explained if only one person was ordering food.
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JiHyun taking his food with him when he goes to the bathroom but leaving his drink. We saw him take a bite out of the food, so if that food was real and he left it on the bench, we would have seen evidence that food had been eaten. But we never see JiHyun take a sip of his drink AND we never see JaeWon or JiHyun buy that drink. Meaning it is completely feasible that JaeWon ordered two drinks and set that one down for "JiHyun" even though he isn't actually there.
And of course, there is further evidence, in my mind, for this being a hallucination or mental break of some sort due to the many, many instances throughout Episode 6 of JaeWon's face being blurry.
For example, here:
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And here:
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And here:
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And...ok you know what? I'm going to stop these examples here
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The morning they wake up on the beach seems fake, again it feels too bright, too heavenly in a way:
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And the kiss scene is so interesting to me for a few reasons, and is also why I am leaning towards hallucination/imagination. First of all, they are in public, there are other people around on that beach. When JaeWon was holding JiHyun's thigh in Episode 4 and JiHyun's best friend came out on the roof, they slid apart real quick.
And it's not like their attraction to one another hasn't been obvious, and it's not like JaeWon hasn't literally kissed men in front of people before. They aren't completely opposed to being openly queer, but this is a huge, undeniable, and extremely public kiss.
I am also just so in love with the choice the production team made to cut out all sound when they are playing in the water. Because that silence can be interpreted so many ways, the main two for me being: intimate and insidious.
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"To cause you trauma," is an excellent response to JaeWon asking why JiHyun kissed him. Because water is, presumably, a very traumatizing thing to JaeWon. I don't think he said how his brother died, but his microexpressions to JiHyun referencing water torture definitely lead me to believe that JaeWon's brother drowned (learning to surf perhaps?) and JaeWon finds both comfort and pain in returning to the sea as a way to feel connected to his brother but also to punish himself for failing him.
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Then we get the bed scene. Now, I don't want to presume anything about JiHyun, he's totally allowed to be a slut, but...this show has continuously established this boy as naive and innocent. Like, totally unaware of the implications of asking JaeWon if he wants to "eat ramen".
So to go from not understanding innuendos and still not being entirely certain that JaeWon kissed you intentionally that first time or if he was just drunk, to full on make out sessions and getting dicked down? I am all for JiHyun testing out his slut era, but I don't think that is the case here.
And I'm citing the background music as part of my evidence here. Because the background music is the song "I Can't Lose it All" and comes in at the last verse of the song, BEGINNING WITH THE LYRICS:
"I'm losing my mind
So darling just call
Tell me everything's alright
I don't want to slow
I can't lose it all
Make me feel like I'm suppose to go
Tell me what you thinking about me when I'm gone."
--
Which honestly, makes me believe JaeWon is imagining all of this intimacy with JiHyun as something that he craves but can't let himself actually seek out. Therefore he is letting himself have it all.
And I just want to give a shout out to this shot:
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The way the waves are washing over their feet, in this room that we didn't see them rent, when they were only supposed to stay there for one night and now are apparently on night two in a fancy room instead of camping on the beach. It's a beautiful shot, but also some beautiful foreshadowing to the tragedy at the end of the episode, with the water rising up to meet them.
My final piece of evidence that this entire episode has all been in JaeWon's head?
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This shot at the end where JaeWon is sitting by himself, looking at his hand in the sand because I'm pretty sure this shot comes chronologically before JiHyun's drowning. I think it's what any outside observer would actually see if they were to look at JaeWon, and I think the image below, in the brighter light, holding JiHyun's hand, is the hallucination that JaeWon is having.
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Which meanssssssssssss............
If we believe the trip itself to be real, but JiHyun's presence on the trip to be false...
JAEWON IS THE ONE WHO IS DROWNING/DROWNED.
If we take this entire trip to be imagined/a dream then he hasn't actually woken up from binge drinking the night before and in that case I would say that he could be aspirating on his own vomit at the end. Either way, I feel like next episode might start with JaeWon waking up in a hospital.
Personally I think the greater tragedy would be JaeWon had a mental breakdown, disappeared without a trace, wound up at the beach here, and drowns, alone. With the resolution being that he is rescued, revived, possibly involuntarily committed or something for a possible suicide attempt...
...which now that I think about it, this could straight up be a suicide attempt of him trying to overdose on his medication, and like the alcohol result above, the drowning could be him aspirating his own vomit from overdosing on pills.
ANYWAY
All of this to say, I think JaeWon maybe took his therapist's question "why not make the relationship deeper?" very much to heart, and imagined a world where he was comfortable confiding in JiHyun and being entirely honest with him.
And also all of this to say that I believe there will ultimately be a happy ending for this show with JaeWon almost dying resulting in JaeWon finally cutting his shitty friend out of his life, JaeWon's Dad possibly being less aggressive after realizing he almost lost both of his sons, and JaeWon and JiHyun admitting their feelings for each other and being boyfriends in love surrounded only by supportive friends. I think JaeWon will end up graduating with his business degree but maybe pursue photography as a career or something at the end.
And I'm tagging @bengiyo, @shortpplfedup, @chicademartinica, and @respectthepetty because I want your THOUGHTS, I want your FEELINGS, I want your THEORIES and also tagging @lurkingshan because as I was scrolling through tags to try to find the original post about the possible medication induced psychotic break that started my theories rolling, I noticed you point out a lot of the same things I mentioned here so I also want your thoughts, feelings, and theories, or at the very least say that you are not alone in thinking that this was fake.
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smokeybrandreviews · 3 years
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Tomorrow Should Have Died
So i was planning on reviewing The Tomorrow War because it’s a new film and i like new films i can watch without having to brave the plague. I saw a preview for this thing a while back and had real low expectations for it, figured it’d be dumb fun like Independence Day. Imagine my abject horror when it turned out to be so much worse. Okay, first things first, the good stuff. Chris Pratt is good and so is J.K. Simmons. Betty Gilpin and Yvonne Strahovski work miracles with what little they have. The sound design is exceptional, probably the best thing about this sh*t flick, and the actual effects are on point. The problem with the movie is the script. It’s f*cking terrible. Oh my god, so much dumb! Here’s a list of sh*t that made me irrationally angry, in order of plot progression.
Eleven minutes in and i hate it. How are you losing a war to anything if you have mastered the ability to traverse space-time? How the f*ck is your technology so advanced, that you have found a way to exceed the light speed limit and literally break physics, but lose to a bunch of rabid, interstellar, komodo dragons? This is the dumbest f*cking contradiction I have seen all year and i am offended that whoever decided to make this film, is asking this of their audience. Sh*t is patently absurd. These f*cking things don't even have written language, man, and you really expect me to believe they have pushed a human race that has harnessed the power of time, to the brink of extinction?
Eleven minutes, bro. Eleven f*cking minutes.
Seriously, you can create a time machine, you should conceivably have the ability to harness gravity or one of the other fundamental interactions. Why the f*ck haven't you designed a miniaturized rail gun that uses modern tech or materials to build? You have worked out the science in the future, go back to the past and build miniature or handheld doomsday devices for use in the field. Why isn’t everyone running around with f*cking Megatron fusion cannons on their arms? Why the f*ck am i fighting aliens with ARs and Glocks?? The fact that there is an active time machine built from tech on hand from thirty years into the future, means cats could have spent their time building actual weapons to kill these f*cking things instead of betting the literal human race on a time displaced draft. This movie is dumb as rocks.
The way they describe how their time travel works is dumb. I mean, it isn’t, but i can guarantee this sh*t is going to be a problem later. I can feel it in my bones. They are definitely going to contradict this sh*t because multiverse theory is the only way to make movie time travel work and they are trying their damnedest to not do that.
This f*cking thing is over two hours long and the first drags. I hate when cats attempt to develop characters and they just fail at it. I'm sitting here trying to figure out why I should care about any of these people and i still don't have an answer after half the goddamn movie is over. Like, why should i care about Chris Pratt? He’s the main character and the writing has done nothing to endear him to the audience in a whole ass hour.
Also, the reason he’s so mad at his dad is stupid. Dude did right by his kid by bailing because he would have been a terrible father. Pratt’s character would have known that as a father himself. He didn’t have to like it and, of course there’s animosity there, but you’re an adult. Your dad knew he was lousy. He did you a favor by walking out. It wasn’t like he didn’t help support you or make sure you went without. As far as i can tell, dude was there in every way by physically. Because he couldn’t. Because he was f*cking shell-shocked from fighting in Vietnam. Where they raped innocent women and set babies on fire. Holy sh*t, this cat is an unlikable protagonist after this one scene. Which brings me to my next thing...
Pratt f*cking abandons his family?? Word? After that entire scene with his dad and the very obvious trauma he has suffered, he turns around and abandons his own kid because he lost his job?? Word? Like, for real? You expect me to believe that the Chris Pratt who cussed out his pops, was willing to go on the run from his future conscription, abandoned his own family because he lost a teaching job?? What the f*ck, movie? Do you want me to like this asshole or not? More than that, how the f*ck you mess up your character so bad in what i imagine is just five pages of actual script? Nothing we know about this character would ever even hint at him doing this to his family, to his daughter, so why the f*ck would he? Why the f*ck would you, as a write, believe we, as the audience, would just accept that sh*t as a forgone conclusion?
You got ropes on a Queen and you don't kill it? How the f*ck you make it that deep into the hive to even do-si-do the b*tch to the surface? We just watched these things tear through Miami to the point that they needed a whole ass bombardment just to survive and you not only go into their hive, their home, with no heavy ammo, but you somehow lasso a queen and drag her to the surface. Alive. If you can do all of that why not just drop a nuke down there and blow them the f*ck up? Why do you need a live Queen for your science? Shoot the b*tch, take the juice of her corpse, and end this sh*t! Why is all of this stupid recklessness necessary??
Okay. Okay... F*ck everything i just said, right? Why the f*k did you bring this Queen b*tch back to your base? You don’t have a different offsite lab to do this sh*t? You gotta bring her to your stronghold? Isn’t this a military operation? Why aren't their security protocols and sh*t in place to stop this stupidity? You don’t bring the enemy home. You take them to black sites for sh*t like this, not to the goddamn Pentagon!
All of a sudden, the aliens understand science? We spent this entire movie establishing that they are mindless beasts with teeth, eating the human race into extinction but now, because the plot demands it, the Queen one understands what the people are doing? That the green sh*t they made is plague that can murder them all? How the f*ck she even know what science is? They don’t even have language, dude! How the hell she know they made a death plague for her people?! F*ck it, whatever, bro. Next you're going to tell me she let them capture her just to get inside the lab or some sh*t because these rabid f*cking animals, who have demonstrated no military command abilities or even the barest of higher cognitive functions, are tactical geniuses.
Okay, so the Queen b*tch is a tactical genius. So, in the initial future drop, the team was murdered by a bunch of these things because they were sent to a lab where they were trying to make the death plague. Now, hat i am about to say is all assumption on my part because none of this, and i men NONE of it, is ever confirmed by the movie. So, they get to the lab and everyone is dead but the green per-plague is still there. That mean they had a Queen there. It’s established after this that Queens can call for backup and the Males will lemming their way to her. I deduce that’s how this lab got overrun; Queen got loose, called for her boys, and they ate everyone. That happened. That was the first thing we see in the future. This b*tch does the same f*cking thing on the home base lab so now the males are overrunning The Pentagon. You motherf*ckers knew this was a thing because it literally already happens. Why the f*ck would you do it again? AND it gets worse... Home base, The Pentagon, is the f*cking rig where they house the goddamn time machine! You brought a hostile enemy leader, still alive and coherent, to the heart of your resistance operation, to the core of your time travel operation, knowing that at any time this b*tch can scream and have your whole ass base overrun with teeth and poison darts? Look, if the future is this stupid, they deserve to die, okay?
At least they commit to multiverse theory, even if it contradicts the entirety of their already established time travel rules.
Okay. Okay... So they create this toxin to kill all the monster things and send it back in time to be mass produced  Put that sh*t in bullets and send it back to the future or whatever. But, because of the aforementioned stupid, that plan is bunk. Time machine go kablooey. And now we are at the "all is lost" moment at the end of the second act." Solution to the problem in hand, no way to save the future because the only way back to the future was a casualty of idiocy. Right. So... just wait. F*cking just wait. You know when these assholes show up, you know how to kill them all, you even have a plague ready to be mass produced right now. You have thirty f*cking years to refine that formula, to make it cheaper to mass produced and develop variants just in case immunities start to crop up or something. There are people from the future, stuck in the past, because of the egregious future error. They have all of that intel and they are just alive. The second this dude got back to the past with that antidote, the future was saved. The war is over. Like, even if you don’t know where the ship is, you have a sure thing that will murder these white f*cks and three decades to produce, weaponize, and store that sh*t. The war is won. The Prime timeline is absolutely safe at this point. Because that's how time travel works. You have the nuclear option, right now, to averting the end of the human race, ready to be mass produced. Yo have the knowledge from the future on where these things will first appear. You still have all the future tech brought over from the beta timeline ripe for reverse engineering in order to improve the weapons of the present. There is no scenarios where we lose this war, the second Chris Pratt plops back into the present with that plague. None.
Why is everyone so dejected?? Why are there f*cking riots all over the world?? None of this makes sense. How can you assume the world ends and the war is lost just because the communication with that version of the past is cut? Wouldn’t you expect that sh*t? You just altered the entire timeline by sending Pratt back with the antidote. That future is effectively gone. How can you communicate with a place in space-time that doesn’t exist anymore? Hell, even if it’s because the time machine broke and everyone over there is dead, you have the f*cking antidote now! Multiverse theory, bud. The fact that those time displaced assholes didn’t disappear, means multiverse theory is real and you have the opportunity to Future Trunks this sh*t so why panic? Why are there no leaders n television assuring their people that this is a thing? Why are there no scientists publishing papers about how sh*t is going to be fine? Bro, I'm just so tired...
How these cats just fly into Russia on a big ass cargo plane and not get shot down? This is 2022. Putin still hates us. This sh*t would cause a World War.
So you find this ship and you don’t tell anyone where it is? You decide to just kill them all yourself? Motherf*cker, what happens if you die? Did you back up the enzyme formula somewhere or did you bring all of it with you on this stupid f*cking mission? Did you leave notes or even text your location to anyone in authority, just in case haphazard attempt goes sideways so someone else can make a more organized attempt? Or just drop a nuke on the site from orbit? If one asshole denied you funding for your mission, why didn’t you ask someone else? Why didn’t you ask f*cking Putin? Because governments are bloated down with bureaucracy? My dude, people from the future came back and interrupted the world cup to tell you that aliens are going to exterminate the human race in three decades. If you tell anyone in a position of power that you know where these little sh*ts are, they’re going to listen. Especially since everyone decided to riot because the future changed/we lost the time war/ the timeline imploded.
Why would a terrestrial saw work on an intergalactic star ship? That doesn't make any sense. This f*cking thing survived a crash landing into earth intact and a goddamn circular saw cuts it open? Fine, whatever. On to the next stupid thing.
Bro. Bro, they just blow the f*cking thing up. Motherf*cker spent the entire movie, time jumping form the past to to the future and back to the past, just to get this plague to kill them all, and a bunch of C4 just blows them all up while they sleep. Why the f*ck was everything even f*cking necessary? At this point, when the dude comes back with that claw the first time, the future is saved. Analysis on that one claw gave up the location of the hidden spaceship where these things had been in stasis for millennia. Which was blown up with C4. No plague needed. No goddamn time draft needed. No casualties needed after that first wave. The second that dude brought back that claw, it should have been  under a forensic microscope so actual f*cking scientists could figure out what a high school kid id in a matter of minutes. I hate this movie so goddamn much.
I hated this goddamn movie so much. It’s f*cking boring and the dumbest thing I've seen all year and i watched Army of the Dead. It’s pretty and the performances are decent, but there is absolutely no substance to any of this sh*t. It wants to be Independence Day and Edge of Tomorrow and The Great Wall. all in one, while infusing time travel family drama but it’s so f*cking confused trying to juggle all of that, it drops the ball on the most important part; The script. This thing must read like a fever dream induced by peyote because, in execution, it’s a wet fart. This f*cking thing is all over the place with no regard for any insular universe logic. It contradicts itself from one scene to the next and it’s goddamn offensive. I’m sure there is someone saying that i am overthinking this sh*t and that it’s just supposed to be dumb popcorn fun. I get that. However, i can’t just turn my f*cking brain off and mindlessly drool over sh*t that insults my intelligence the way this movie does. It’s dumb as f*cking rocks, man, and i want those two hours of my life back!
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trensu · 4 years
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Episode 29: The One where WWX is the Grandmaster of Self-Loathing and It Kills Me
~THEIR SONG~ IS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND ALREADY
WHICH MEANS WE’RE STARTING THE EPISODE WITH QUALITY WANGXIANTICS
Actually the whole episode has High Quality wangxiantics and then it guts you with depressing feelings ahahaha 
bc apparently we’re not allowed to have nice things without Suffering™
So they’re sharing a meal at some meal-selling place in Yiling (idk guys, is it a winehouse? a teahouse?? An inn??? DOESN’T MATTER)
Lwj and wwx are sitting on either side of the table looking somber
I guess they’re feeling awkward maybe??
Idk why, it’s weird
A-Yuan starts frolicking around lwj and wwx gets all antsy about it
He’s all hey, stop bothering lan zhan, come here!
And A-Yuan is all like, NO, I DON’T WANNA and clambers oNTO LWJ’S LAP
IT’S TOO ADORABLE
Wwx starts to scold him but lwj is like NO NO, THIS IS FINE
Wwx teases a-yuan
He’s all, oh, i see how it is, you’ll just chuck me to the side for anyone who’s willing to buy you stuff, huh?
Like i said before, a-yuan is a smart cookie
Then a-yuan takes a seat and goes to town on a bowl of soup.
I understand, a-yuan, i love soup too.
And then he calls wwx to get his attention SO HE CAN SPOON-FEED HIM A BIT OF HIS SOUP AND IT’S TOO CUTE 
Wwx is like, oh, so you DO still love me!
Lwj watches this go down and then informs A-Yuan very somberly of the lan fam rule “no talking during meals”
That’s RIGHT
LWJ JUST DAD’D THE HECK OUT OF HIM
A-yuan continues to chow down on his food but definitely stops talking
Wwx is offended and aghast that a-yuan obeys lwj so easily and he complains to lwj that he has to repeat himself SEVERAL TIMES before a-yuan listens to him
Lwj: silence during meals. You too.
Wwx just smiles at the ridiculous rule and continues talking
Wwx: you haven’t changed one bit. 
Wwx: you know, i know my way around this town, i can be your tour guide!!
Lwj pointedly does not take him up on his offer AND I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY, IT’S NOT LIKE HE DOESN’T WANT TO SPEND EVERY WAKING MOMENT WITH WWX ANYWAY
Wwx: lan zhan, you’re a terrible liar. You aren’t in town for me, are you?
And still lwj doesn’t respond??? 
IT’S BECAUSE OF THAT STUPID LAN FAM RULE, ISN’T IT??
TALK TO YOU SOULMATE, DAMN IT
WHO CARES IF YOU’RE HAVING A MEAL WHILE YOU’RE AT IT
Wwx: you know, i was gonna invite you over to my place but if you’re just gonna nag at me about my demonic cultivation and how i should meditate or whatever, then forget about it
Wwx: i can control myself! I don’t need anyone to save me.
Lwj: wei ying
Wwx: lan zhan, i finally bump into someone i know who doesn’t try to avoid me...it’s been a boring couple of months, why don’t you tell me about any big events happening?
Lwj: what do you mean by big events?
Wwx: idk, like if there’s any new clans or if any clans expanded or made new alliances...just chit chat! Anything is fine.
Lwj: a marriage
Wwx: a marriage? Which clans? 
he sounds so excited to get some juicy gossip here
It’s not gonna last long
Lwj: the jin clan and jiang clan
Wwx: do you mean my sister---Lady Jiang and Jin Zixuan?
Oh god it HURTS
He corrected himself when he called jyl his sister
BECAUSE HE’S NOT PART OF THEIR CLAN ANYMORE
And then he plasters on a smile TO HIDE HOW HURT HE IS THAT THIS IS ALL HAPPENING WITHOUT HIM and asks when the wedding will be
WHICH TURNS OUT TO BE TWO WEEKS AWAY
And his face iS ALL SAD AND HE’S STILL TRYING TO MUSTER UP SMILES 
He’s all, such a big event and jc didn’t even try to tell me about it!
Wwx: even if he told me about it, what could i do then? I defected officially and have no ties to them. What could i do if he had told me?
Wwx: *chugs wine*
Alcohol, wwx, we’ve talked about the alcohol thing. Please stop drinking.
LWJ CAN’T EVEN LOOK AT HIM RIGHT NOW BC HIS SOULMATE IS HURTING AND THERE’S NOTHING HE CAN DO TO MAKE IT BETTER
Wwx: lan zhan, what do you think about this marriage? Oh, right, you don’t care about this sort of thing.
Wwx: i know everyone says that my sister doesn’t deserve jzx, but in MY eyes, that peacock doesn’t deserve her! 
He slams down his wine jar and his voice gets all upset 
And little a-yuan reaches out and grabs wwx’s wrist TO COMFORT HIM, PRECIOUS DARLING BABY
Wwx: She deserves the best man in the world!! JC and i promised her a grand wedding that would be remembered forever!! No other wedding would compare!!
Wwx: and it doesn’t even matter because i won’t be able to go anyway.
AND HE HAS THE SADDEST SMILE ON HIS FACE 
Obviously he takes another swig of wine here because alcohol makes everything better in wwx’s book, which is a lie but since when does anyone listen to me
Lwj: wei ying
And lwj was about to say something else but they get interrupted by wwx’s home alarm talisman informing him that’s something going down in the burial mounds
So wwx grabs a-yuan and dashes out the door
Lwj is quick enough on his feet to remember to pay for the meal and grab a-yuan’s toys (very important, very important, it’s why a-yuan likes him right now) and then follows wwx
Wwx: lan zhan, why are you following us??
Lwj: wei ying, where’s your Magic Ghostbusting Sword?
Wwx: uhhhh...i forgot it at home?
Lol, lwj doesn’t even bother to respond to that. He just grabs a-yuan and runs with wwx all the way back to the burial mounds
OH NO, THERE’S RESENTFUL ENERGY EVERYWHERE BEATING PEOPLE UP AND MAKING A MESS OF THINGS
Holy crap, wwx does this really impressive Dramatic Twirl and magically slams the resentful energy away
HE’S SUCH A BADASS
IT’S ALL IN THE ~TWIRL~ BABY
Lwj hands a-yuan off to granny while wwx gets the low-down
Turns out Wen Ning sort of woke up but is not, like, all there or smth idk
It’s sad seeing wen ning all violent and mean like this when he’s such a gentle soul :(
ON THE PLUS SIDE, we get to see wwx and lwj work together to save him!!
Surprisingly, the flying here is not super cringey, it’s only mildly awful
LWJ HAS GOT HIS GUQIN OUT AND PROCEEDS TO GUQIN THE HECK OUT OF WEN NING
Also, i love how it kind of looks like he “powers up” his guqin attack by making that circular motion over the strings? The accompanying music from that motion really makes it seem like it’s charging up. I like it.
While lwj is guqin’ing wen ning to stay in one place, wwx goes ninja-fast and slaps like, ALL the talismans on wen ning and activates them simultaneously
And between the two of them, they manage to save wen ning from being a mindless zombie forever!! I mean, he’s still a zombie but he’s got his mind back! EVERYONE’S REALLY HAPPY, INCLUDING ME.
Wwx to wen ning: how are you feeling?
Wn: i feel like crying
LOL ME TOO WN THAT’S USUALLY HOW I FEEL LIKE WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME THAT
Wn: ...but i can’t
Oh.
I take back my lol
Not being able to cry when you want to is actually super depressing.
Lwj: you did it *is impressed*
Wwx: of course! I’m a man of my word. Hey, since you’re already here, why don’t you visit for a bit?
Cut to wwx and lwj walking into the cave that wwx calls home
Lwj: ...it’s called the demon-subdue palace?
Wwx: YEP! I named it myself!!
Wwx: now, i know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking it’s a terrible name, BUT THAT’S WHERE YOU’RE WRONG
Wwx: see, i know everyone thinks i’m, like, evil or whatever and this is the place i sleep most often. 
Wwx: a cave with a demonic man lying down in it all the time? Of course it should be called demon-subdue palace lololol
Me: *facepalm* stop….stop naming things, wwx.
Wwx: let me show you around!
I would like to point out that they walk past the ONE BED in the cave to start the tour
This ONE BED in this SPECIFIC CAVE has featured in many a wonderful fic! And should continue to feature in many more wonderful fics
Wwx: this here is my Blood Pool! It’s where i heal up and buff my stats, just like you have your Cold Spring! Except mine has water that smells like blood and comes out of that creepy giant stone face thing
Lwj looks rightfully concerned
And also, i am offended on his behalf that wwx would compare this creepy ass pool to the cold spring. How very dare.
Oh man, they’re about to have a Serious Conversation
BUT IT’S BETTER THAN THEIR LAST SERIOUS CONVERSATION
Because this time they actually talk things out
(see, lwj can learn from his mistakes!)
Lwj: wei ying...can you really control it?
Wwx: control what? Wen ning? Of course I can! Look at him, he’s all better!
Lwj: what if he loses himself again?
Wwx: i’m a pro at handling his rampages now. As long as i have Plot Device 2, nothing will happen to him!
Lwj: but what if something happens to you or Plot Device 2?
Wwx: it won’t
Lwj: how can you be sure?
Wwx: it won’t and it can’t!
Lwj: you want to keep it this way from now on?
Wwx: what’s wrong with that? Don’t underestimate this land! It’s bigger than YOUR land and the food here tastes better too!
Lwj: wei ying, you know what i mean
Wwx: lan zhan, i’m trying to avoid the topic and you keep talking about it!!
Then their Serious Conversation gets derailed bc wwx starts coughing. Which might not seem like a big deal but it is
Lwj: your injuries…
And here lwj grabs at wwx’s wrist but wwx yanks it back real fast
Bc the wrist is where they check for spiritual energy or smth and we all know wwx doesn’t have that anymore, since he GAVE UP HIS GOLDEN CORE
Wwx: no need. Why use spiritual energy for such a small wound. I can just sit here and let it heal on its own
LOL, WE’RE GETTING A FUN BIT HERE TO MAKE UP FOR ALL THAT SERIOUS STUFF BEFORE
Wen Qing walks in and is all, what, my badass doctor skills aren’t good enough for you? I could totally heal you
Wwx: what are you doing here interrupting my date with lwj. Are you done crying already?
Wq: i’ll make you cry
Wwx: pffft, yeah right
Wq: *goes and hits wwx in the back*
Wwx: *coughs up blood*
Yeahhh, i wouldn’t want to go toe-to-toe with wen qing unless she asked me to and then i would happily do whatever she wanted
Wwx: you’re so cruel! *swoons like some maiden*
Lwj: wei ying! *catches him all gallantly*
WWX YOU LITTLE FAKER, YOU JUST WANTED LWJ TO HOLD YOU
And we know this bc wen qing pulls out her Very Scary Medical Needles and wwx wisely RUNS AWAY even tho he was all “passed out” two seconds before
And after that fun bit, the show makes me sad about tea somehow. I don’t even like tea.
Wwx is all, wen ning, why are you serving our guest water?? How embarrassing, go get the tea!
And wen ning is all, but there’s no tea??
Then wwx is like, well we gotta get tea for next time we have guests
There’s a hella awkward pause
Wwx: that’s right, we won’t have any more guests…
THIS STUPID SHOW IS GIVING ME FEELINGS ABOUT TEA
MY ONE TEA OBSESSED FRIEND HAS BEEN TRYING TO MAKE ME FEEL STUFF FOR TEA FOR YEARS WITH NO SUCCESS
AND THIS, LIKE, TWO MINUTE SCENE MADE ME SAD ABOUT TEA
Anyway.
We cut to the next scene which has wwx walking lwj out of the burial mounds and we’re getting another Serious Conversation
Wwx: lan zhan, you asked me if i intended to keep things the way they are now. Tbh, i also would like to know what else i could do besides this.
Wwx: give up my crafty tricks and turn over Plot Device 2? What happens to the Wens? Do i turn them in? I can’t do that.
Wwx: i believe if you were me, you wouldn’t be able to do that either
WHY IS HE SUCH A GOOD PERSON. WWX IS BETTER THAN ALL THE OTHER CULTIVATORS PUT TOGETHER
Wwx: can anyone give me any better options? One where i can protect those i want to protect without using demonic cultivation?
He says this so passionately. HE JUST WANTS TO PROTECT PEOPLE. HE’S WILLING TO DO OTHER THINGS IF IT MEANS HE CAN STILL PROTECT PEOPLE BUT HE CAN’T!!! AND I AM DISTRESSED.
Lwj doesn’t say anything in response.
He knows wwx is right and there’s nothing he can do to make things better for him
Wwx: lan zhan, thank you for your company today. And thank you for telling me about my sister’s wedding
HE SAYS THIS WITHOUT LOOKING AT LWJ AND HE LOOKS LIKE EVERY WORD HIS HURTING HIM BECAUSE THEY’RE ALL WORDS HE’S USING TO SAY GOODBYE AND HE DOESN’T WANT TO SAY GOODBYE TO LWJ.
And before i can start crying, A-Yuan appears to make me feel better!!!
He’s latched onto lwj’s leg again (bc i mean, honestly, who wouldn’t??)
And he’s asking lwj to stay for dinner!!
Wwx: a-yuan come here. Lan zhan has his own food at home. He won’t be eating with us here.
A-yuan: but i heard a secret! I heard there was going to be lots of tasty food today!
Wwx scolds a-yuan for half a second before turning to look at lwj WITH THE MOST HOPEFUL EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE
HE WANTS LAN ZHAN TO STAY FOREVER FOR DINNER TOO
But for some unfathomable reason lwj looks at a-yuan and says that he is leaving.
WHY
YOU WANT TO STAY THERE TOO
WHY MUST YOU TWO MAKE THINGS SO DIFFICULT FOR ME YOURSELVES
Wwx gives this stiff, sharp nod like, yeah, of course of course, i knew that, this doesn’t kill me inside AT ALL
Lwj walks off and wwx + a-yuan make their way towards the burial mounds
A-yuan: will the rich man ever visit us again?
Wwx: what rich man?
A-yuan: the one from just now!
Wwx yoinks the toy butterfly from a-yuan’s hand here
Wwx: you really like him that much, don’t you?
And he holds the toy out of reach and teases him
A-yuan: give it back! He bought that for me
Wwx: no! I won’t give it back until you say i’m your favorite
And this entire adorable scene is being watched by lwj who is just a ways away 
I’d say he’s lurking like a creeper, but Hanguang-jun is too honorable and handsome to be called a creeper by anyone ever. 
BUT he is lurking. 
He looks all solemn
A-yuan tells wwx what he wants to hear and gets his toy back.
Unfortunately wwx’s distraction tactic didn’t work
A-yuan: so will the rich man come back or not?
Wwx: probably not
A-yuan: Why??
Wwx: there’s no reason why. In this world, everyone has their own paths to walk.
A-yuan: oooh
Lol, he nods like yeah, i totally understand what you’re telling me bc i’m a big kid who can know things. HOW CUTE!
AND HERE WE GET THAT QUOTE. THAT IMPORTANT ONE. THE ONE THAT IS LATER USED AS A PUBLIC LOVE CONFESSION.
Wwx: who needs the crowded, broad avenue? I’ll stick to my single-log bridge until it’s dark.
Lwj is still here, watching. And he hears wwx say this.
Lwj doesn’t turn to walk away for real until wwx and a-yuan are out of sight
HE WANTED TO SEE THEM FOR AS LONG AS HE COULD
I’M TOTALLY NOT TORN UP ABOUT THIS
I’M CHILL AND COLLECTED FOR REAL
Then we cut to wwx arriving back at the demon-subdue palace where there’s a surprise dinner party!! 
AND A-YUAN GETS SO ADORABLY EXCITED OVER THE ABUNDANCE OF FOOD, I LOVE IT SO MUCH i get excited about food too, a-yuan!!
This whole thing here is very sweet and this is when we really see wwx accept the wens as his family rather than as his moral obligation
As the @theuntamednarrator said, they gave him homemade liquor! That’s the one guaranteed way to our sunshine boy’s heart!!
It’s all super sweet, like i said, until wwx gets himself plastered. Then it takes a turn towards the Hella Depressing. 
I really want to skip over it because it really is HELLA DEPRESSING AND STILL MAKES ME LEGIT CRY ACTUAL TEARS EVERY TIME I WATCH IT 
but i can’t because it’s got some wangxiantics and this is a wangxiantics guide
So everyone at the dinner party drinks until they pass out, basically. 
Except for wen qing, who is completely sober, and wwx who is an alcoholic with an inhumanly high tolerance apparently
He’s all flushed and red-eyed tho
Wwx: wen qing, the first time i saw Lan Zhan was when i snuck Emperor’s Smile into the Cloud Recesses
He laughs here, remembering; it’s all cute here for a bit.
Wwx: it’s too bad you didn’t see his face, his stony face...but the emperor’s smile is really good. I wonder if i’ll ever get a chance to drink it again
And his entire demeanor changes here. He started out more or less cheerfully reminiscing about his first meeting with lwj but in that last bit his whole posture droops and he gets the saddest look on his face
Wen qing notices this, but is kind enough to pretend not to by focusing on wiping down that table.
Wwx: i’m a good for nothing
OH GOD
Wwx: i promised my sister i would help her hold the most splendid wedding in the world
FUCK, HERE COME MY TEARS
And wen qing fucking freezes here eVEN SHE KNOWS THIS IS GONNA HURT
Wwx: but now, i can’t even attend the wedding
Wwx: i’m completely useless, i am completely useless
SHIT, GOD DAMN IT, I DON’T FUCKING WANT TO CRY WHERE ARE THE GOD DAMN TISSUES 
Wwx: i am completely useless
HAVE MERCY, HAVE MERCY ON MY POOR HEART, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
So while i’m fucking sobbing out every ounce of moisture in my body, we cut to the cloud recesses and we see lwj kneeling in front of a set of closed doors
(we’re not going to dwell too long on that because i’m already in fucking shambles from two seconds ago and i can’t handle any more Family-Related Sadness right now)
He’s on his knees, with his arms outstretched holding two long, heavy bamboo sticks
There are disciples scurrying around and avoiding the scene, like oh shit, better not get in the middle of that
Lwj’s head is ever so slightly bowed, still as a statue, and completely blankfaced
And we get ~their song~ BUT WITH VOCALS THIS TIME
THE FIRST TIME WE HEAR THE VOCALS WITHIN THE SHOW
YOU KNOW
THE VOCALS THAT ARE SUNG BY THE ACTORS PLAYING OUR BELOVED LWJ AND WWX???
YEAH
THOSE VOCALS
BECAUSE I WASN’T FEELING ENOUGH INTENSE EMOTION YET
The scene starts off in the daylight and we see him enduring this punishment 
HOURS go by bc it’s dark and there’s a good inch of snow accumulated around him by the time some random lan cultivator dismisses him
Lwj gets up GRACEFULLY (bc that is his default mode, i guess?? HOW??) and there’s a literal patch on the ground completely devoid of snow bc that’s how long and still he kneeled there for, holy shit.
And he walks away calmly
There’s no more wangxiantics in this episode
But show-runners decided they didn’t want to COMPLETELY DESTROY OUR SOULS just yet so they give us an anticlimactic but kind of cute ending to the episode 
We get to see that there are “yiling patriarch disciples” who are actually frauds in terrible cosplay trying to sell mediocre talismans at high prices
and wwx is all “who the heck are these guys, wait, i don’t actually care”
We get to see that the wens are slowly starting to prosper in their little corner of the burial mounds
Also, somebody built a shrine and left food offerings at the entrance to the burial mounds?? Which, hey, wwx doesn’t say no to free food and neither do i because what kind of crazy person turns down free food??
And, i mean, that’s basically it?? Like i said super anticlimactic
SO WHO ELSE HERE IS SITTING IN A PUDDLE OF TEARS NOW? ANYBODY?? ANYBODY???? PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME CRYING BY MYSELF, THAT WOULD BE PATHETIC, I CAN’T HELP IT IF I HAVE A HEART FULL OF FEELINGS
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smokeybrand · 3 years
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Tomorrow Should Have Died
So i was planning on reviewing The Tomorrow War because it’s a new film and i like new films i can watch without having to brave the plague. I saw a preview for this thing a while back and had real low expectations for it, figured it’d be dumb fun like Independence Day. Imagine my abject horror when it turned out to be so much worse. Okay, first things first, the good stuff. Chris Pratt is good and so is J.K. Simmons. Betty Gilpin and Yvonne Strahovski work miracles with what little they have. The sound design is exceptional, probably the best thing about this sh*t flick, and the actual effects are on point. The problem with the movie is the script. It’s f*cking terrible. Oh my god, so much dumb! Here’s a list of sh*t that made me irrationally angry, in order of plot progression.
Eleven minutes in and i hate it. How are you losing a war to anything if you have mastered the ability to traverse space-time? How the f*ck is your technology so advanced, that you have found a way to exceed the light speed limit and literally break physics, but lose to a bunch of rabid, interstellar, komodo dragons? This is the dumbest f*cking contradiction I have seen all year and i am offended that whoever decided to make this film, is asking this of their audience. Sh*t is patently absurd. These f*cking things don't even have written language, man, and you really expect me to believe they have pushed a human race that has harnessed the power of time, to the brink of extinction?
Eleven minutes, bro. Eleven f*cking minutes.
Seriously, you can create a time machine, you should conceivably have the ability to harness gravity or one of the other fundamental interactions. Why the f*ck haven't you designed a miniaturized rail gun that uses modern tech or materials to build? You have worked out the science in the future, go back to the past and build miniature or handheld doomsday devices for use in the field. Why isn’t everyone running around with f*cking Megatron fusion cannons on their arms? Why the f*ck am i fighting aliens with ARs and Glocks?? The fact that there is an active time machine built from tech on hand from thirty years into the future, means cats could have spent their time building actual weapons to kill these f*cking things instead of betting the literal human race on a time displaced draft. This movie is dumb as rocks.
The way they describe how their time travel works is dumb. I mean, it isn’t, but i can guarantee this sh*t is going to be a problem later. I can feel it in my bones. They are definitely going to contradict this sh*t because multiverse theory is the only way to make movie time travel work and they are trying their damnedest to not do that.
This f*cking thing is over two hours long and the first drags. I hate when cats attempt to develop characters and they just fail at it. I'm sitting here trying to figure out why I should care about any of these people and i still don't have an answer after half the goddamn movie is over. Like, why should i care about Chris Pratt? He’s the main character and the writing has done nothing to endear him to the audience in a whole ass hour.
Also, the reason he’s so mad at his dad is stupid. Dude did right by his kid by bailing because he would have been a terrible father. Pratt’s character would have known that as a father himself. He didn’t have to like it and, of course there’s animosity there, but you’re an adult. Your dad knew he was lousy. He did you a favor by walking out. It wasn’t like he didn’t help support you or make sure you went without. As far as i can tell, dude was there in every way by physically. Because he couldn’t. Because he was f*cking shell-shocked from fighting in Vietnam. Where they raped innocent women and set babies on fire. Holy sh*t, this cat is an unlikable protagonist after this one scene. Which brings me to my next thing...
Pratt f*cking abandons his family?? Word? After that entire scene with his dad and the very obvious trauma he has suffered, he turns around and abandons his own kid because he lost his job?? Word? Like, for real? You expect me to believe that the Chris Pratt who cussed out his pops, was willing to go on the run from his future conscription, abandoned his own family because he lost a teaching job?? What the f*ck, movie? Do you want me to like this asshole or not? More than that, how the f*ck you mess up your character so bad in what i imagine is just five pages of actual script? Nothing we know about this character would ever even hint at him doing this to his family, to his daughter, so why the f*ck would he? Why the f*ck would you, as a write, believe we, as the audience, would just accept that sh*t as a forgone conclusion?
You got ropes on a Queen and you don't kill it? How the f*ck you make it that deep into the hive to even do-si-do the b*tch to the surface? We just watched these things tear through Miami to the point that they needed a whole ass bombardment just to survive and you not only go into their hive, their home, with no heavy ammo, but you somehow lasso a queen and drag her to the surface. Alive. If you can do all of that why not just drop a nuke down there and blow them the f*ck up? Why do you need a live Queen for your science? Shoot the b*tch, take the juice of her corpse, and end this sh*t! Why is all of this stupid recklessness necessary??
Okay. Okay... F*ck everything i just said, right? Why the f*k did you bring this Queen b*tch back to your base? You don’t have a different offsite lab to do this sh*t? You gotta bring her to your stronghold? Isn’t this a military operation? Why aren't their security protocols and sh*t in place to stop this stupidity? You don’t bring the enemy home. You take them to black sites for sh*t like this, not to the goddamn Pentagon!
All of a sudden, the aliens understand science? We spent this entire movie establishing that they are mindless beasts with teeth, eating the human race into extinction but now, because the plot demands it, the Queen one understands what the people are doing? That the green sh*t they made is plague that can murder them all? How the f*ck she even know what science is? They don’t even have language, dude! How the hell she know they made a death plague for her people?! F*ck it, whatever, bro. Next you're going to tell me she let them capture her just to get inside the lab or some sh*t because these rabid f*cking animals, who have demonstrated no military command abilities or even the barest of higher cognitive functions, are tactical geniuses.
Okay, so the Queen b*tch is a tactical genius. So, in the initial future drop, the team was murdered by a bunch of these things because they were sent to a lab where they were trying to make the death plague. Now, hat i am about to say is all assumption on my part because none of this, and i men NONE of it, is ever confirmed by the movie. So, they get to the lab and everyone is dead but the green per-plague is still there. That mean they had a Queen there. It’s established after this that Queens can call for backup and the Males will lemming their way to her. I deduce that’s how this lab got overrun; Queen got loose, called for her boys, and they ate everyone. That happened. That was the first thing we see in the future. This b*tch does the same f*cking thing on the home base lab so now the males are overrunning The Pentagon. You motherf*ckers knew this was a thing because it literally already happens. Why the f*ck would you do it again? AND it gets worse... Home base, The Pentagon, is the f*cking rig where they house the goddamn time machine! You brought a hostile enemy leader, still alive and coherent, to the heart of your resistance operation, to the core of your time travel operation, knowing that at any time this b*tch can scream and have your whole ass base overrun with teeth and poison darts? Look, if the future is this stupid, they deserve to die, okay?
At least they commit to multiverse theory, even if it contradicts the entirety of their already established time travel rules.
Okay. Okay... So they create this toxin to kill all the monster things and send it back in time to be mass produced  Put that sh*t in bullets and send it back to the future or whatever. But, because of the aforementioned stupid, that plan is bunk. Time machine go kablooey. And now we are at the "all is lost" moment at the end of the second act." Solution to the problem in hand, no way to save the future because the only way back to the future was a casualty of idiocy. Right. So... just wait. F*cking just wait. You know when these assholes show up, you know how to kill them all, you even have a plague ready to be mass produced right now. You have thirty f*cking years to refine that formula, to make it cheaper to mass produced and develop variants just in case immunities start to crop up or something. There are people from the future, stuck in the past, because of the egregious future error. They have all of that intel and they are just alive. The second this dude got back to the past with that antidote, the future was saved. The war is over. Like, even if you don’t know where the ship is, you have a sure thing that will murder these white f*cks and three decades to produce, weaponize, and store that sh*t. The war is won. The Prime timeline is absolutely safe at this point. Because that's how time travel works. You have the nuclear option, right now, to averting the end of the human race, ready to be mass produced. Yo have the knowledge from the future on where these things will first appear. You still have all the future tech brought over from the beta timeline ripe for reverse engineering in order to improve the weapons of the present. There is no scenarios where we lose this war, the second Chris Pratt plops back into the present with that plague. None.
Why is everyone so dejected?? Why are there f*cking riots all over the world?? None of this makes sense. How can you assume the world ends and the war is lost just because the communication with that version of the past is cut? Wouldn’t you expect that sh*t? You just altered the entire timeline by sending Pratt back with the antidote. That future is effectively gone. How can you communicate with a place in space-time that doesn’t exist anymore? Hell, even if it’s because the time machine broke and everyone over there is dead, you have the f*cking antidote now! Multiverse theory, bud. The fact that those time displaced assholes didn’t disappear, means multiverse theory is real and you have the opportunity to Future Trunks this sh*t so why panic? Why are there no leaders n television assuring their people that this is a thing? Why are there no scientists publishing papers about how sh*t is going to be fine? Bro, I'm just so tired...
How these cats just fly into Russia on a big ass cargo plane and not get shot down? This is 2022. Putin still hates us. This sh*t would cause a World War.
So you find this ship and you don’t tell anyone where it is? You decide to just kill them all yourself? Motherf*cker, what happens if you die? Did you back up the enzyme formula somewhere or did you bring all of it with you on this stupid f*cking mission? Did you leave notes or even text your location to anyone in authority, just in case haphazard attempt goes sideways so someone else can make a more organized attempt? Or just drop a nuke on the site from orbit? If one asshole denied you funding for your mission, why didn’t you ask someone else? Why didn’t you ask f*cking Putin? Because governments are bloated down with bureaucracy? My dude, people from the future came back and interrupted the world cup to tell you that aliens are going to exterminate the human race in three decades. If you tell anyone in a position of power that you know where these little sh*ts are, they’re going to listen. Especially since everyone decided to riot because the future changed/we lost the time war/ the timeline imploded.
Why would a terrestrial saw work on an intergalactic star ship? That doesn't make any sense. This f*cking thing survived a crash landing into earth intact and a goddamn circular saw cuts it open? Fine, whatever. On to the next stupid thing.
Bro. Bro, they just blow the f*cking thing up. Motherf*cker spent the entire movie, time jumping form the past to to the future and back to the past, just to get this plague to kill them all, and a bunch of C4 just blows them all up while they sleep. Why the f*ck was everything even f*cking necessary? At this point, when the dude comes back with that claw the first time, the future is saved. Analysis on that one claw gave up the location of the hidden spaceship where these things had been in stasis for millennia. Which was blown up with C4. No plague needed. No goddamn time draft needed. No casualties needed after that first wave. The second that dude brought back that claw, it should have been  under a forensic microscope so actual f*cking scientists could figure out what a high school kid id in a matter of minutes. I hate this movie so goddamn much.
I hated this goddamn movie so much. It’s f*cking boring and the dumbest thing I've seen all year and i watched Army of the Dead. It’s pretty and the performances are decent, but there is absolutely no substance to any of this sh*t. It wants to be Independence Day and Edge of Tomorrow and The Great Wall. all in one, while infusing time travel family drama but it’s so f*cking confused trying to juggle all of that, it drops the ball on the most important part; The script. This thing must read like a fever dream induced by peyote because, in execution, it’s a wet fart. This f*cking thing is all over the place with no regard for any insular universe logic. It contradicts itself from one scene to the next and it’s goddamn offensive. I’m sure there is someone saying that i am overthinking this sh*t and that it’s just supposed to be dumb popcorn fun. I get that. However, i can’t just turn my f*cking brain off and mindlessly drool over sh*t that insults my intelligence the way this movie does. It’s dumb as f*cking rocks, man, and i want those two hours of my life back!
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jeontaeh · 3 years
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〚THIRTY NINE〛
Jungkook got confronted by Hoseok, Yoongi, and Namjoon a week later.
He was in the library during the study period, listening to Dolly Parton while doing math homework. Because nothing solved calculus like some good old country music! He was halfway done when he heard a clearing of a throat.
"Jeon." A voice came abruptly, and Jungkook took his earphone out and looked up, raising his eyebrow when he saw the three boys. Namjoon in his glasses, Yoongi with his disheveled shirt sticking out of his trousers, and Hoseok looking slightly nervous.
"What?" Jungkook asked, voice flat.
With everything that had been going on so far in the school year, three of his best friends suddenly shunning him and pretending like he never existed was one of the worst. He was close to them. Maybe not how close he was to Jimin, but it still counted.
They ate lunch together every single day. Jungkook used to help Yoongi with his Chemistry assignments. Hoseok used to call Jungkook 'Kookie Boy' and always grin when Jungkook scowled. Namjoon used to help Jungkook with his English homework, always ruffling his hair afterward.
To just... ignore him like that. To completely push him away and even actively make homophobic remarks towards him. It sucked.
"We wanted to talk to you." Hoseok stated, and Jungkook saw the orange haired boy and then bit his lip.
"Okay..." Jungkook trailed and then saw Namjoon sigh. "Jungkook- we came here to apologize. About being so... rude about the gay thing."
Jungkook stilled. He looked at them with widened eyes. Hoseok nodded. "We were assholes to you. You don't deserve that, Jungkook! I've been wanting to apologize for ages, honestly. It just... it occurred to us suddenly how badly we fucked up." Hoseok mumbled.
"Why now?" Jungkook asked, and then saw Yoongi give him a look.
"Yesterday at football practice- one of the guys made a homophobic comment towards Sehun. Sehun didn't say anything, but V got really mad and yelled at everyone. Said stuff about how we were being ignorant and shouldn't make jokes like these." Yoongi said, hands in pockets.
Jungkook stilled. "Oh." Jungkook said, looking down at his notebook.
"We're sorry. Truly. Jin also kind of beat our ass." Namjoon said, and Jungkook bubbled out a giggle. "So yeah. We don't expect you to forgive us-"
"I don't. Not instantly. But- but people make mistakes. And you guys are still young, so the earlier you decide to change, the better." Jungkook said, giving the boys a small smile. Hoseok and Namjoon smiled brightly, while Yoongi just gave him a small smile. "I forgive you guys."
"Yay!" Hoseok said, and then jumped into the seat beside him, startling Jungkook. "You look bored as fuck doing maths. Let me show you this new track the three of us have been working on-" Hoseok said, taking his phone out.
"You guys do music now?" Jungkook gasped, grinning. It made him realize he hadn't had a proper conversation with them for months. Random small words exchanged during classes and football practice didn't count.
"Yeah! We rap." Namjoon said, and Jungkook giggled. "Or at least we try to." Yoongi added.
"I'm sure you're great! Let me hear it-" Jungkook said, and then got lost in mindless chatter with the boys.
///
kth_v
240 likes, 80 comments kth_v whats up broski
view comments...
eka11 change the caption instantly
jiminpark hottie thottie
eka11 @jiminpark "straight"
oohsehun wow
kth_v @oohsehun ?
minahearts you look so good 😍
eka11 v is so fucking hot
jeonjungkooks eka thats literally mex
eka11 mine too jungkook u aint special
jiminpark yall weird as fuck
jiminpark but he's hot tho mmm im straight but wow
jeonjungkooks why tf did sehun comment 'wow'
eka11 because he has eyes
jiminpark yah no offence i know u hate v or whatever but like damn must've been fun having sex with him
eka11 it really was
jeonjungkooks yeah
jeonjungkooks anyways u guys are the worst best friends why are you bringing up how good my 'ex' looks when im BOYCOTTING him
jiminpark sorry 👉🏻👈🏻
eka11 was he fun to top
jeonjungkooks i didnt?? top him?? why would i? im a Bottom 😙
jiminpark i know i saw the disposable vaginal douche in the garbage
eka11 omg i use that
jeonjungkooks omg wig
eka11 anyways wbk you're a bottom hows sehun been... is he still like 'fuck me daddy i'll be ur good little boy and take ur fat cock'
jeonjungkooks sehun has never said those words ever in his entire existence in humanity
jeonjungkooks and anyways idk we haven't had sex for a while
jiminpark 👀
jeonjungkooks like it just gets awkward so i just suck him off or something :/
eka11 no offense but why are u still dating him
eka11 he deadass cheated on u lmaooo
jiminpark didnt u cheat on like all of your boyfriends
eka11 this isnt about me
jeonjungkooks because he came over after that whole fiasco and i was crying he kind of comforted me and stuff and kept apologizing he told me that he was scared i dont like him back
jiminpark you dont
jeonjungkooks and idk i just had some fam issues so i was being mean to everyone sorry <3
eka11 its okay bby
eka11 but break up with sehun
jeonjungkooks i dont want to hurt him again! wait he texted me one sec
oohsehun babe there's a spring prom coming up omg lets go! matching clothes and all
jeonjungkooks we'll get bullied
oohsehun true
jeonjungkooks but sure sehunnie <3
oohsehun <3 <3 <3
///
"10-minute water break!" Coach announced, and the boys scurried off the field and towards the benches to go drink water. Taehyung heard him, but didn't care. He glared at the red circle on the goal post in front of him. He needed to hit the target at least once.
Taehyung hit the ball hard, fast. All the boys watched as the ball went straight towards the center of the goal, but missed the target by half an inch. The boys all gasped at how close he was, but Taehyung groaned to himself, crouching down and breathing heavily.
"V go get water. Don't exert yourself," Coach said, and Taehyung grumbled under his breath and stood up to walk over to the benches. The boys were all talking. Taehyung picked his water bottle and squeezed it tightly, squirting the water into his mouth.
"That's what good pussy tastes like."
"God, shut up." Taehyung begged Jackson, who huffed and turned away.
"Are you guys going for that Spring Prom shit?" Yoongi asked the guys, who hummed, some sounding annoyed. "Yeah. My girlfriend's making me. I rather stay in and fuck, but-"
"Tell me about it, bro. Talked to this girl one fucking time and suddenly I'm her boyfriend. She's making me go too. But we might have sex after, so I'm doing it." Another guy said.
"I'm going with Jungkook." Sehun said off-handedly, looking into space. Taehyung ignored how those simple words made it feel like someone straight up STABBED him.
"Dude... y'know ever since I've stopped thinking being gay was weird.... I realized liking dudes isn't much different than liking girls. Like, there are some dudes who are like... hella cute and shit. But I don't wanna date 'em. Y'know?" Jackson voiced. The boys snickered, some grimaced as if saying we don't know.
"You're probably just bicurious." Taehyung mumbled, and the guys looked at him, saw him wiping his sweat off with a towel. "Like you're straight but are into having sex with dudes too."
"Woah. That's a thing? Holy shit, I've been confused as fuck these past few weeks." Jackson gasped, and Taehyung hummed.
Sehun suddenly got up and left. Taehyung ignored him. He heard a gasp. "What does it mean if I like dick in my mouth?"
"You're fucking gay Bambam."
"Would you guys ever hook up with a dude? Like, for experimentation and shit?" Namjoon asked.
Jimin hummed. "Yeah. I wouldn't mind. How do I know I don't like it if I've never tried it?"
"Just like I know I wouldn't like your mom's pussy in my face."
"Fuck you."
"I guess I'd only hook up with a dude if I was really really into him. Not just like that." Mark mumbled, sounding weary.
"What about you, V?" Jin asked, looking at him. Taehyung looked at him, casually. He opened his mouth to speak. Right when he was about to-
"Guys Jungkook got us cookies," Sehun said brightly.
Taehyung didn't hear. "Nah I'd never fuck a dude. That's fucking gay, bro. I'm not into that kind of-"
Jimin coughed VERY loudly. Taehyung turned and saw Jungkook right behind him. Taehyung widened his eyes.
"Oh." Taehyung let out. Jungkook looked in disbelief. Taehyung's breath hitched. "Hey, um-"
"Seriously?" Jungkook asked, voice small. "Still?"
"Jungkook-" Taehyung tried, but Jungkook just snickered humorlessly and then moved away from Taehyung, grabbing Sehun.
"Meet me after practice." Jungkook said softly, and then kissed him on the mouth and turned around by the hell, walking away. Taehyung saw him walking away and sighed.
Jimin walked up to Taehyung after Sehun walked away, oblivious. Jimin looked at Taehyung. "How the fuck do you further fuck up something already so fucked up?"
"I don't know." Taehyung breathed out, and Jimin just shook his head, letting the boy deal with this mess himself. Taehyung saw Jungkook walk off the field as if he was disappointed, but not surprised.
"Boys, back on the field. Last one here has to take 3 laps-" Coach began, and all the boys got up and ran. Taehyung walked slowly, knowing he'd end up doing laps anyway because he stays back after practice to practice more these days.
"Okay boys. We've been target practicing to perfect our kick. And, I'll be honest, ya'll suck." Coach said, and the boys hung their heads low. "Like WOW. None of you hit the target even ONCE."
Taehyung pushed past the group of boys huddled in a circle and faced the open goal post which had the red circle in front of it. Still? Jungkook's words rang in his head. Taehyung saw the ball in front of it, and then took a few steps back.
Taehyung clenched his jaw and locked his ankle, eyes boring into the ball in front of him. He took a chaste step forward, hitting his planter foot to the right of the ball. His foot needed to control how the ball moved, rather than letting the ball control his foot-
Taehyung kicked the ball forcefully, feeling the power gliding smoothly down his calf to his foot as it merged with the ball and sent it spiralling towards the net. It hit the target perfectly.
The boys saw that and started clapping and shouting, some telling the coach that he took the L. Coach watched Taehyung and smirked, and Taehyung turned around and saw the boys.
"You're seriously as good as the pros," Youngjae said excitedly.
"We're so going to win our next match!" Hoseok said, jumping up and down.
Sehun suddenly shouted. Everyone froze and looked at him. Sehun groaned, putting his hands on his face.
"What're you doing, Coach?" Sehun asked, voice low. "Why'd you make me Captain?" Sehun asked wearily. Everyone widened their eyes, and Taehyung tensed.
"You alright kid?" Coach asked, and Sehun shook his head. He shook his head and then reached his hands behind his back and took his jersey off. He took the red material off and then chucked it on the floor.
"I don't want to be captain anymore. Not when V's clearly so much fucking better than me. It's not fair to him nor to the team." Sehun snapped, and Taehyung was frozen, eyes wide.
"Oh." Taehyung breathed out. Sehun was shirtless now, and breathed heavily. "I don't want to take something away from someone if it clearly belongs to them. And the position of Captain clearly belongs to you," Sehun said, and picked his jersey up and handed it to Taehyung.
"This is... really. Really fucking sick, dude." Taehyung said softly, in awe. "Fuck. I could kiss you right now." Taehyung grumbled to himself.
"R-really?" Sehun asked, eyes growing wide, glittering, cheeks turning a bit pink. Taehyung frowned at that.
"What? No. It was a fucking hyperbole- anyways! Thank you, Sehun. But I don't think Coach can-" Taehyung began, and then he heard a groan.
"Come on, coach! V should be Captain again! He's nice now, too! He apologised to Youngjae."
"He did WHAT?! Holy shit, he has changed!" Coach gasped, and then looked at Taehyung, who was gulping. "Look, kid. I have to discuss this with the principal-"
"Becoming Captain would help me get into a good school, coach." Taehyung said softly, hands coiled, eyes big. He reminded the coach of the kid he met four years ago, with ruffled brown hair and big brown saddened eyes, just sticking through because of the determination and passion he had for football.
"Jeez. Okay, um- I'll hold a vote tomorrow. After discussing it with the principal." Coach promised, patting Taehyung's back. "Now get back to practice!"
Taehyung smiled, and looked at Sehun, snickering. "You taking your shirt off was useless, by the way. This jersey has your name on it. Plus I still have my Captain's jersey-"
"It still made the statement though- you can't deny that." Sehun said, and then tugged his jersey back on.
"Thanks." Taehyung mumbled, looking away. He could never looked someone in the eyes while saying something nice to them.
"No problem. Consider it an apology for what I did... before." Sehun mumbled, and then chuckled awkwardly and ran away, flustered. Taehyung sighed to himself, coiling his fists.
I'm in love with your boyfriend, Taehyung wanted to shout out. But he didn't. Instead, he felt something. Certain confident courage he'd always had coursing through his veins.
///
"I'm sorry," Taehyung said two days later to Jungkook, who he found alone in the washroom, standing in front of the mirror.
"I'm not the person you should be apologizing to." Jungkook said softly, and then turned around and walked away- and that was the only interaction they had.
And then two days after that, Taehyung lifted his head up and saw Jungkook standing in front of his food table.
"Yourself. Apologize to yourself." Jungkook stated simply. Taehyung was confused, but Jungkook turned around and left, leaving him like that, with only those few words to hang on by.
The week passed like that. With a certain fog in Taehyung's mind. He thought about what Jungkook said. Apologize to yourself. He didn't quite understand. He wanted to know more, but Jungkook did tell him to leave him alone.
Taehyung saw Jungkook by the lockers and walked up to him, opening the locker beside him (even though it was Yoongi's, but, whatever) and hesitated.
"Why can't things go back to normal?" Taehyung asked aloud.
"I don't know what normal is with you." Jungkook said, and then walked past him. Taehyung closed his locker in front of him, leaning against it and sighing out.
Their next conversation was the night before the prom.
"Will you ever forgive me for hurting you?" Taehyung asked, standing by the water fountain. Jungkook was also by the water fountain, and Taehyung saw his fingers tighten around the ceramic sink.
"I already have." Jungkook breathed out softly, and then leaned down to the water fountain to get water between his pretty lips.
"Why're you with Sehun?" Taehyung asked, puzzled, leaning against the pillar which was attached to the water fountain/
"I like him."
"You don't."
"You sound quite certain for someone who's so shit with their feelings." Jungkook said sharply, and then brought his head up to look at Taehyung, who had a blank expression on his face. "Sorry," Jungkook said quicker, turning around and walking away, again.
The night of the prom arrived.
Taehyung stood in front of his mirror, looking at himself. He was wearing a white shirt, sleeves rolled to his elbows, making his veins prominent. Along with that, he wore black trousers. It was simple, but honestly, he was only going because Yoongi promised he'd give him weed after.
He heard a sharp knock on the door. Taehyung was confused as to who would come to his dorm, and opened the door, and saw Eka and Jimin. Taehyung's eyebrow rose at them.
"You guys look good. Shit, is it so fancy?" Taehyung asked, annoyed. Eka was wearing a tight silver dress, short and lifting her boobs up, her eyeliner sharp and lipstick black. Jimin had his hair swept back, showing his forehead. He was wearing a red suit.
"It is. You're not wearing that." Eka said, turning Taehyung around and pushing him into his bedroom.
"I literally don't give a fuck about this prom. I'm single and sad and want to get high." Taehyung protested.
"What the fuck is on your head," Jimin stated while looking up at Taehyung. Taehyung sighed. "It's a Gucci headband. I like wasting my dad's money."
"Understandable. Put this on." Eka said, having opened Taehyung's closet and taken out a black suit jacket. She handed it to Taehyung, who rolled his eyes and shrugged the suit jacket on.
"Here." Jimin said, picking out a Rolex watch from his desk and handing it to him. Taehyung wrapped it around his wrist, and then snickered to himself. "What?" Jimin asked, and Taehyung shook his head.
("You look hot as fuck in a suit." Jungkook said, eyes wide as he wrung his fingers around Taehyung's wrist. "C-can you fuck me with it on?"
"I can and I will.")
"Nothing. Just reminiscing the past." Taehyung said, and Eka huffed. "Dramatic bitch. Now come on." Eka said, walking out of Taehyung's dorm.
"You look hot as fuck, Eka." Taehyung said, putting his hands in his pocket. "In a friend kinda way."
"Thanks. I know." Eka said, and Taehyung snickered. Jimin eyed him and glared. Taehyung rolled his eyes.
They walked to the sports hall, where the Spring Prom was taking place. The student council went overboard with this Prom stuff. Decorating the hallways weeks before. Putting big banners which said 'SPRING PROM!' on them. Announcing it every goddamn day on the speakers.
When they walked into the sports hall, they saw it completely decorated. The sides of the walls were lined with paper mache trees which had pink blossoms on it. It looked pretty. Taehyung couldn't remember what the room looked like before, in fact. The tables on the side were lined with food and drinks. No alcohol, but someone always snuck it in. Teachers stood by the side, talking to themselves and looking around to make sure no one was doing anything wrong. There was a stage against the wall, some music nerds standing on it, playing music for the event. Everyone who went to the school was there, practically. People were dancing, talking with their friends, or just having a good time.
"Wow," Eka murmered, and the three walked into the room, looking around. Taehyung was bored already. "Why'd you guys come to my room by the way? Did you, like, know I was going to underdress?"
"No. You've just been upset for the past few... weeks. We were making sure you were actually coming. Yoongi told us about how he made you believe he had weed-"
"He was lying? Motherfucker. I'm leaving." Taehyung said, turning around sharply. The moment he did, he froze.
Jungkook stood by the entrance, looking around with his big curious eyes. He looked nervous, palpable hesitance showing from his stance. He was wearing a silky white shirt which was tucked into his tight black trousers, accentuating his waist. He wore a floral suit jacket and a choker.
"Wow," Taehyung let out this time, already feeling his insides going weak. Taehyung didn't see Eka and Jimin beside him give each other a knowing look, and then look ahead at Jungkook, who spotted the three.
"Hi!" Jungkook said, smiling and running up to them, looking less tense when he saw them. "Y-you said to meet me by the entrance." Jungkook said softly.
Taehyung wanted to give him a thousand kisses. "Sorry, Kookie. We came in. Doesn't this place look beautiful?" Jimin asked.
"Yeah! They're really going deep with this spring theme thingy," Jungkook giggled. Taehyung wanted to give him a million kisses now.
Jungkook looked at Taehyung, and tensed. Taehyung didn't know why. It was probably his presence. So Taehyung just gave the boy a small smile and turned around to walk away and find the other guys.
Jungkook, meanwhile, let out a small sigh. "He looks so good." Jungkook murmered to himself, voice gentle. "I wish he didn't."
"I know, baby. Don't think about him, okay?" Eka said, and Jungkook nodded. "Where's Sehun?" Eka asked, looking around.
"I'm here, bitches." Sehun said, and Jungkook looked at him and then rose his eyebrows. Sehun was in a bright blue suit and a black shirt and tie, smirking at them.
"Hey babe," Jungkook said to Sehun, who walked over to him, leaning down to kiss his mouth. Jungkook turned his head so Sehun could kiss his cheek instead. Sehun did, and then leaned back, scowling.
"You look... nice." Jungkook said.
"You too." Sehun mumbled. Jimin sighed, breathing out from the heavy tension in the room.
"Wow. Okay- um! Let's dance!"
The four began dancing away. Jennie, Jisoo, Lisa, and Rose joined the four, along with Yugyeom and Bambam. Jimin looked to Rose with a small smile, dancing closer to her. Jungkook was having fun, until he felt his hips being grabbed.
Jungkook got dragged to a body, and then realised Sehun had his chest pressed against his back. "You look pretty." Sehun said, kissing his neck, rolling his hips onto his back. Jungkook smiled at him, dancing back.
Sehun turned the boy around and then grabbed his waist. He reached down, kissing Jungkook's lips. Jungkook pulled away and then looked to the other side so Sehun wouldn't do that again.
"What's wrong?" Sehun asked, frowning. Jungkook shook his head, giving Sehun a smal smile. "Nothing," Jungkook reassured, putting his hands on Sehun's arms.
Jungkook looked to the side and saw Taehyung, leaning again a wall, sulking. Taehyung shifted his eyes around the room and then caught them with Jungkook's. Jungkook felt Sehun tighten his grip on his waist, and Jungkook just looked at Taehyung.
Sehun kissed Jungkook's jaw. "Do you wanna go to my room after this?"
Jungkook saw Taehyung give him a certain look. Jungkook wanted to move his eyes away, but couldn't. Suddenly, he felt a jolt through his body and turned his head, eyes widened when he was pushed back.
"What's your problem?" Sehun snapped, and Jungkook stilled. Sehun looked annoyed, eyes darkened, eyebrows furrowed.
"Nothing! I-" Jungkook began, but then saw his friends looking at the two weirdly. Sehun must've seen the same, because he grabbed Jungkook by the forearm and dragged him out of the sports hall.
Jungkook stumbled after him. "Se-Sehun-" Jungkook said, and then suddenly felt a shift as he moved out of the loud pink lightened room into the dark, vacant hallway. Sehun pulled him till the side and then let him go.
"What is it? You've been weird since we started dating- so fucking on and off. One second you want me, and another you're weirded out and want me to go away. I'm just trying to wrap my fucking head around all this, Jungkook- because- because you say you want me, but-"
"I'm sorry, o-okay? There's just a lot of things that have been going on-" Jungkook stammered.
"Then talk to me about them! I've asked you to at least try and open up to me so many times! But you just refuse to! Is it something wrong with me?" Sehun asked, frowning.
"N-no. No, you're perfect-" Jungkook said softly.
Sehun looked helpless. "Then what is it? Why did you get back together with me if you were going to treat me like shit after? You were so rude to me, and don't even talk to me sometimes when we're with Eka and Jimin. It's really awkward, Jungkook, to pretend I'm alright-"
"I'm sorry!" Jungkook cried out, and then stopped, looking at Sehun with watery eyes. The way Sehun was describing him reminded Jungkook of Taehyung.
"I-I'm sorry for- for being so weird. I just- I-I don't know, Sehun. I want to like you, I r-really do. I just can't fucking get over someone and it's r-ruining everything for me. I'm sorry." Jungkook let out, voice bubbly, as if close to crying.
Sehun tensed, and then looked down at his shoes, gulping a lump in his throat. "It's V, isn't it?"
Jungkook began crying, reaching his hands to his face to stop them, to try his hardest to stop them. Jungkook shook his head. "N-no. I don't- I am over him. I am."
"You like him." Sehun said, looking away. "He likes you too-"
"No Sehun. He d-doesn't. He just wants to have sex with me, that's all-" Jungkook tried, but Sehun snickered, looking away.
"That night. That night when we first had sex. When you left suddenly to comfort V- did you two do anything?" Sehun asked, fingers coiled. Jungkook sniffled. "Because the next day you were all fucking over him-"
"Sehun-"
"So he wants you for sex, huh? And you're still hung over him? Even though you have guys who like you for you?" Sehun asked, and Jungkook looked down, clenching his fists and shutting his eyes. "That's pretty fucking pathetic, Kook."
"I know. Stop telling me, p-please." Jungkook tried, and Sehun tsked.
"I don't want to be rude. You just made me feel so fucking shit for the past few weeks. If you just told me I was a fucking rebound for an asshole-"
"Y-you w-weren't-"
"-I wouldn't have ever asked you out. You probably just did it to make him jealous. I'm so fucking stupid." Sehun muttered under his breath, looking away. "Well, honestly- I don't care much. You're hung over a dude who's probably going to slap you across the face when you say no to him-"
"He wouldn't!" Jungkook cried, tears rushing down his face. Sehun looked at him, pausing. "H-he wouldn't fucking do that! You don't know him, no one does! I don't either, o-okay? I thought I did- I-I thought I knew him, b-but I don't! And I'm still in love with him, i-is that what you want me to tell you?" Jungkook shouted, voice breaking.
"I f-fell in love for a guy who doesn't give ha-half a shit about me. And I'm sorry." Jungkook squeaked out weakly. Sehun let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Jungkook felt the warm tears running down his face and put his hand over his mouth, shoulders trembling.
"I'm sorry. I-I need to go. I'll ask Jimin and Eka to come here-" Sehun said, and Jungkook didn't care, just slid down the wall, sitting down on the floor like the fucking mess he was- tears running down his face.
Jungkook sat there for a bit, crying softly. He felt the same feeling he had back when Taehyung told him he didn't mean anything to him. When Jungkook found him sleeping with Eka, and Taehyung slammed the door in his face. So fucking hurt.
"Kookie," A soft voice came, and Jungkook looked up.
Taehyung had his eyes big, looking at the pretty boy on the floor, tears in his eyes and stains of it weaving a path down his cheeks. Taehyung had one hand in his pocket, heart thudding as he crouched down to face him.
"K-Kookie, you-"
"Don't." Jungkook said, and then closed his eyes. Taehyung didn't push him. He just looked at him. "P-please. Leave me be."
"Not when you're like this, I can't." Taehyung said softly.
"God f-fucking damnit, Taehyung- stop pretending you c-care about me! You'll j-just lead me on to hurt me again. You don't know how I felt for those two months w-we spent together, Tae. You don't. Just. Please go." Jungkook said meekly, sniffling and looking up at the ceiling.
"I-I do care." Taehyung said, but he sounded hesitant, and it made Jungkook chuckle.
"You still think you're straight, Tae." Jungkook let out, voice weak. "You're far from being able to care about me."
Taehyung froze. He looked at Jungkook, who stood up from the floor, eyes slightly red from the tears. Taehyung's breath hitched, and then he let out- "I-I'm so fucking scared, Kookie. I'm not as- as brave as you. I never will be."
"T-then come meet me when you are." Jungkook stated, and then left, leaving Taehyung in the hallway.
Jungkook walked back in the sports hall, probably to tell Jimin and Eka of where he was, they were probably worried. Taehyung tightened his fists. He couldn't describe it. Couldn't describe the absolute fear that reaped through his body at the thought of-
At the thought of what?
Was it of everyone finding out?
Was that what he was afraid of?
Or was it something bigger than that? His mother, his father, what they'd taught him. What his mother had left him with. That fear that he was doing what she would've resented.
But at the fleeting moment, at that split second, that passing of time when the moon glowed outside like a watchful guardian- Taehyung realized. He rose to his feet, standing up. His heart drummed loudly against his chest, as if on beat, heightening his senses and telling him to hurry up. He was running out of time.
Taehyung took a step forward, towards the sports hall. Jungkook. His beautiful eyes, how they looked like they'd been dipped in honey and the core of sunlight. How his giggles sounded like that of harmonious angels. How his smile would always make Taehyung feel so much... better.
Something he hadn't felt since his mother had died. A sense of belonging. Home.
Taehyung walked towards the sports hall and entered it, seeing people still dancing, some chill song playing. Taehyung couldn't find Jungkook. His heart was racing. His anxiety was brimming at the bottom of his stomach.
He felt, at that moment, like he could do anything.
Taehyung felt absolute impulse take him over. Adrenaline started pumping down his body, the same he felt at football matches. This felt like a football match, except the goal was something different, and his aim was fucking terrible.
Taehyung let go. He ran straight forward and jumped onto the stage, startling the dudes in the band. They all looked at Taehyung, who carelessly grabbed the microphone from the lead singer, some kid from the grade below. The kid looked annoyed, but Taehyung mumbled "It'll only take a minute."
The band stopped playing, and everyone groaned, annoyed that the music stopped. Taehyung cleared his throat into the microphone, and then took a deep breath. "Shut up!" Taehyung shouted loudly, and everyone in the room shook.
Everyone went silent and turned to look at him with wide eyes, as if wondering why the fuck he was yelling while standing on a stage. Taehyung looked around, and then spotted Jungkook. The boy was facing away, grabbing his phone and trying to walk over to the exit.
"Wait." Taehyung said, and Jungkook paused and looked at him, a blank expression on his face. He looked annoyed.
Taehyung looked around. "Hi guys." Taehyung said, seeing all these kids he'd seen every day for the past three years. "This- this prom is cool, right? Like the- um- flowers and stuff." Taehyung stammered, and then cleared his throat.
"Okay. Hello. I've never formally introduced myself. Most of you know me as V. Captain of the football team." Taehyung said, and saw Sehun in the back of the room, frowning as well. Taehyung took a deep breath, seeing all the students looking at him with wide eyes. "But- but most of you don't know my real name."
Taehyung gulped. "I'm Taehyung. Kim Taehyung." Taehyung said, and there was a hushed whisper that fell across the room. He'd never said his full name out loud like this.
"Most of you know me as that asshole that bullies you, probably. Fair enough. I've made mistakes. A lot of them." Taehyung said. "I don't expect to be forgiven. I just want you to know I'm trying. And I'm changing, and growth is- is normal. It's normal." Taehyung said, nodding.
Everyone looked confused, still. They wanted to start dancing again, probably. But most actually looked intrigued, never having seen the guy speak more than 3 words at best which weren't insults.
"I'm standing here right now because I made a mistake. A really big one." Taehyung said, shaking his head. "I hurt someone. Badly. I hurt someone over and over again, and I shouldn't have. By the time I realized how much the person meant to me, it was too late." Taehyung mumbled, and everyone looked more confused.
Taehyung looked around, and then spotted Jungkook standing beside his friends, just the hint of confusion on his face. Not like the others, though. A more of disbelief.
Taehyung scratched his head, and then sighed loudly. "God, there's so many of you. I swear it's like the new crop of freshmen are, like, so goddamn small. I was so much taller when I was your age, what the hell-" Taehyung mumbled, and then looked around, hearing some laughs.
"I'm rambling, fuck. Shit! Sorry, forgot I couldn't swear. Ah damn, I swore again. Fuck-" Taehyung began, and then hit his head with the mic, and looked ahead, taking a deep breath.
Fuck it. Nothing matters. Not as much as him. Nothing has ever mattered as much as he has. "I'm sort of in love with someone." Taehyung let out, and there were gasps that spread across the room.
Taehyung couldn't see Jungkook's eyes- didn't want to, in fact. "I'm sort of, really, really fucking madly in love with someone. And that someone is standing here right now, and god-" Taehyung let out a chuckle, covering his face. "You'd never think I'd be the type to- to stand on a goddamn stage in the middle of what looks like actual fairy shit and confess my love to someone, but-"
Taehyung looked ahead, and then found Jungkook. Jungkook had his eyes widened, mouth slightly agape. Taehyung smiled. "You change me." Taehyung said, words soft. "You m-make me... a better version of myself. I'm not mean when I'm with you. I'm not sad. I'm not an asshole. You make me study harder, you make me play harder, you make me... harder." Taehyung said the last part, and then started laughing.
"Shit- I just realised there's, like, 200 other people in here. I'm kidding! Don't have sex till marriage! Or, do. I don't know. Sorry Ms. Yang!" Taehyung said, and everyone started laughing. Fuck, he was going crazy. He couldn't get a hold of himself, but suddenly- suddenly it felt like he was so free. So free, so free from everything that's ever been holding him back-
"You know what else?" Taehyung asked, looking around the room. "I'm bisexual!" Taehyung shouted out, and everyone shut up real fast.
Literally EVERYONE's eyes widened and jaws dropped. Girls he'd slept with looked surprised, guys he'd bullied looked mad, people who didn't know him looked shocked. His own friends looked the most shocked.
"Yeah! I like girls, and I like guys. And there's nothing wrong with that. Like, at all. Wow. Oh my god. I said it out loud." Taehyung let out, whispered. "Fuck, okay. Shit. Yeah. It's out there. I'm bisexual. I'm bi-fucking-sexual. I'm so fucking bisexual. Wow. WOW-"
"Dude. The teachers are gonna cut the sound off any minute. Stop swearing." The lead singer dude whispered, and Taehyung nodded.
"Oh- okay okay. Sorry. No more swearing." Taehyung agreed, and then looked ahead and saw Jungkook standing behind Jimin, looking nervous, eyes wide, hands bunched up into fists.
Taehyung looked around. "I've never spoken so much. I just- I can't believe this. I feel so free, y'know? Like- like I'm high as hell, but sober. Not that I know what being high feels like, Ms. Yang don't worry." Taehyung reassured, laughing.
"Who are you in love with?" A voice shouted from the audience, and Taehyung looked.
Taehyung gulped. He leaned into the mic. "A boy." He whispered, and gasps spread across the room again. Taehyung giggled at how surprised everyone looked. "I'm so in love with him, you guys. He's the prettiest boy in the whole goddamn world. Maybe universe. Haven't seen aliens yet. Actually- scratch that. He's the prettiest boy in the universe."
Jungkook hid behind Jimin properly now, hands covering his face, his whole body trembling lightly. Taehyung gulped. Here goes.
"I'm Kim Taehyung." Taehyung said, voice clear. "I'm bisexual." Taehyung said, and then smiled. "And I'm so goddamn in love with Jeon Jungkook."
People literally started screaming. Jungkook squeaked out in surprise and got pushed out into the center by Jimin and Eka, who both looked thrilled as hell. Jungkook still had his face covered, because everyone was looking at him, eyes wide, mouths wider.
"He's WHAT?!" Yoongi shouted from the side, slapping a hand over his mouth.
"Oh my fucking god." Jin whispered, eyes wide. "Oh my god oh my GOD-"
"Guys someone drugged Taehyung and put him on that stage." Namjoon said. It was the only explanation.
"This is brilliant." Yugyeom whispered, eyes glazed. Bambam grimaced. "I fucking knew it. He always looked at him weird."
Taehyung looked at Jungkook, heart racing rapidly, stomach making a thousand turns a second. "Baby?" Taehyung said softly, not caring how that made everyone go even more in shock. "I-I can see you, you know that, right?" Taehyung chuckled fondly.
Jungkook put his hands down, blushing brightly. His eyes were filled with tears, fists clenched beside him. People had moved out of the way, so there was a clear spacing between the stage and where Jungkook was stood, so the boys could see each other clearly.
"Jeon Jungkook." Taehyung whispered into the mic. "I know- I know I'm the biggest douchebag you ever met. I hurt you. I was an asshole." Taehyung said, suddenly growing fearful. "I'm so fucking sorry, baby." Taehyung said, voice weak.
Jungkook just sniffled from where he was stood, cheeks so pink and fists so tightly clenched that he couldn't speak. Everyone was staring between him and Taehyung in awe, surprised, shocked, just couldn't believe that V, the homophobic fuck boy captain of the football team- was out here passionately declaring his love for a boy.
"R-right before I got on this stage, I thought about how you came out to everyone. Always so ridden by impulse, my Jungkookie," Taehyung said with a small fond smile, and people aww'ed. Jungkook bit his lip, looking down.
"So, I'm going to ask this. I'm really really really fucking scared." Taehyung admitted, and then took a deep breath, and closed his eyes.
Be brave. Taehyung opened his eyes. "Jeon Jungkook?" Taehyung whispered, voice barely coherent. "Will you be my boyfriend?"
https://jeontaeh.tumblr.com/post/647264967393984512/forty
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Text
This is our last song- Eleven: This is our last song
He gazed lazily at the sky, feet kicking in the cool water over the edge of the dock. "How far do you think we'll go?" he asked quietly.
His companion glanced sidelong at him. "What do you mean?"
"We've come so far so fast. There's so much we've seen already, but there's multitudes more that we haven't." He rolled onto his side. "Who do you think will see it first?"
"I've lived for a very long time, and have seen and discovered everything the world has ever had to offer to us. I can't help but think that you will be the one destined for the stars."
"Yeah, well, you're still trying to give me quite the run for my money." He faced the stars once again.
"Yes, I am. Just because I believe the cosmos are yours to conquer, doesn't mean I won't try to take them from you anyway."
"This is a dangerous game you keep playing, big guy."
"I know." He smiled cheerfully. "That makes it all the more fun!"
He laughed. "Of course. The threat is the thrill, yeah?"
"Yes, of course."
"You just can't stand to have a child like me be better than the great Mother empire, can you?"
He was silent.
"As I thought." His voice was laced with humor instead of the expected malice.
They had their quiet, peaceful place of nothing more than meaningless talk, just like they always used to. No fights. That was just for show, just part of the act.
"Why is it that you love the sky?" he mused. "What is the appeal that the earth and the ocean doesn't have?"
"There's no boundaries in the sky. Nothing that you have to fight for, nothing and no one to tell you not to do something. It's as free as free can be."
"Free..."
-------
The wind that bit at his cheeks was sharp and cold, and it hurt his ears even though they were covered. He wandered around the outskirts of the Sec listlessly. Something in him told him that there was something there, and that he needed to see it. But he didn't know what he was looking for, exactly.
That is, until he saw the slightest flicker of pale fabric around the corner of a building. "Hey!" he called out to them, trying to see who they were. The person popped their head around the corner, looked around, then motioned for him to follow before disappearing around the wall again.
Alfred sprinted in their direction, trying to catch up as quickly as possible. Surely they couldn't get far when matched against his paranormal speed.
When he reached the edge of the building a few seconds later, the person was nowhere in sight. He stepped out into the piles of rubble that used to be a street, looking for the person he had seen. Something about them seemed familiar.
As he was about to give up and write it off as another hallucination, he heard a voice call his name from somewhere behind him. He whirled around, spotting the person again instantly. "Hey, wait!" he called to them, taking off in their direction once again.
The person, to his exasperation, started moving away again, so he followed. Further and further away from where he should be. Where all of his people were, feeling the effects of sickness.
In the span of only a few months, over half of all of his people had gotten sick with the Honda virus. Over half. And that number was only growing as every day went on. No one had yet died from it, but in many cases their mindless blabbering was taking over, and violent, insane tendencies were showing more and more. Several people had to be detained and isolated to make sure they didn't harm themselves or anyone else. And Alfred was feeling every bit of it. With every new case his self-awareness faded and his already weak grip on reality just got weaker.
Nonetheless, he followed this person down an invisible path that only they knew. Eventually, the person he was following stepped into what remained of an old building, no door on the hinges of the still standing doorway.
A sense of dejavu washed over him as he approached, and he slowed to a cautious walk. He got closer, and peeked over the mostly collapsed wall to see if the person was still there.
The old meeting room bustled with activity. There was his brother, sitting in the exact center of the table, right next to where he would sit. England sat across from him, in a heated conversation with France. China and Japan were muttering to each other quietly at one end of the table, while Germany and Italy listened to Hungary and Prussia retell some old battle tale, probably constantly correcting each other at the other end.
And walking to the front of the room was Russia, beige coat and pale pink scarf firmly in place, as he always had.
He was already in tears by the time he had made it around to the doorway, and he skidded to a halt just inside of the room.
Slowly, everyone turned to look at him, growing silent. Germany smiled. "You're late again, America."
He sniffed and nodded, a watery smile finding it's way onto his face. "Yeah," he said, "I guess I am, aren't I?"
"You should work on being more punctual, Alfred. I raised you to be a gentleman, after all," came the side remark.
"I don't mind so much!" his Russian accent was thick but cheerful, just as he had remembered it. Russia circled the table and made his way back over to him, stopping close enough to touch him. "As long as he is here, I am happy." He kissed the sunny blond's hair before being pushed aside by an impatient Asian.
"You! I need to have a word with you regarding my dear little brother!" China pointed a finger at him accusingly, and Japan grumbled behind him. Then he looked down at the floor almost shyly. Alfred watched him expectantly. "I... I wanted to thank you. For doing what I couldn't bring myself to. For saving him from an... undesirable fate." The American could tell he was having a hard time keeping himself composed, as could Japan.
As if in an unspoken agreement, the two wrapped the ancient in an embrace, comforting him. "Of course, Yao. It was the decent thing to do, yea?" They broke apart, and you could see tears streak all of their faces. They each nodded quietly, and the two dark haired men stepped away once again.
This time his family stepped up to replace them, sharing all of the pent-up emotions and things that they'd never gotten to say, sobbing on each other's shoulders shamelessly. Soon they were done, and moved aside as well.
Germany stepped up, his party behind him. All wore bittersweet smiles. "You've been strong, Alfred," Prussia began. "Always have been. You take after me, of course." Gilbert laughed and his brother shook his head. "But I have to say, you put us through quite a rough patch there."
Alfred looked down guiltily. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry."
Hungary smacked the Prussia in the back of the head. "Ow! You didn't​ let me finish!" He switched his attention back to America. "But we forgive you. We all have been through much worse in our lives. And look at us now!" He smiled. "All back together and happy and whatever other mushy bullshit." Alfred laughed with him, the good mood seemingly contagious.
"God I'm just so happy to see you all again!" he addressed everyone as soon as he got a chance. "I didn't think I ever would."
"Alik, we- I, won't ever leave you again. No matter what." Russia whispered, standing close. Alfred threw himself at the Russian's sturdy frame, gripping at whatever fabrics he could get ahold of.
The watery smile and tears returned, and he hid his face against his chest.
"Thank you..."
End
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fallxnprxnce · 7 years
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Too many muses meme: 1 - 15!
UNFAIR! OMG, WTF! I SHOULD HAVE SAID SEND ONE NUMBER! XD
1. A muse that’s always easy for you to write.
Jix (@xleafyheartx), my leafling fandomless OC. He’s my only muse that I can always write on the spot and never seem to get writer’s block for. It’s probably because he’s so sweet and positive all the time that I never find myself running into issues with not wanting to write certain topics due to a bad mood or whatever. =)
2. A muse that’s often difficult for you to write.
Lacryma (@crackedbellsandsilenttears), my fandomless fantasy spell OC. She doesn’t speak unless another muse teaches her how. In fact, she doesn’t really know much about life at all. It’s just the nature of her character, heh. She learns quickly, but until she gets exposed to things and starts learning how to communicate, it’s difficult for me to get her thoughts and wants across. That she’s also very timid doesn’t help, heh.
3. A muse you want to write but feel you can’t.
Alice Abernathy from the Resident Evil movies. I love her so much and would love to write her, but because she’s one of my favorite characters I just can’t do that to her, haha. I wouldn’t do her justice at all. I’m good at writing emotional, half broken, tragic characters, but I’m not as good at writing ones with real strength. It’s a serious weakness of mine as a writer. Alice is one of those rare characters that is a blend of both. She shifts from more vulnerable and outwardly emotional to hardened and guarded with her emotions as she moves from the early movies to the later ones, but she’s always some mix of strength and vulnerability, regardless of what point in the timeline you’re talking about. I don’t feel that I would portray that sort of depth to my own standards of my Alice deserves, heh. Beyond that, I don’t think I could keep track of all the sheer number of plot lines, histories, and supporting characters that Alice encountered along the way to be able to navigate the fandom while writing her. I haven’t played any of the newer games either, so my knowledge is lacking. Fortunately, I don’t have to write her. There are a few Alices on Tumblr already, and I’ll give a shout out to @realprojectalice who writes Alice exactly how I would want to if I had the skills. She’s amazing, hit her up if you want to write your muse with Alice. =)
4. A muse you lost and really wish you could make active again.
Channe (@fxcelessqueen), my Elven/Ulaeri fandomless OC. I… have no idea where she went or what the problem is, but I want her back dammit. I’ve tried so many times, but she’s just not here right now. I think it’s been a combination of real life causing her to make herself scarce in my head of late and the fact that she does not translate to Tumblr very well at all. But I’ll keep trying, I promise, heh.
5. A muse you lost and you’re fine with leaving them inactive.
Ygritte from Game of Thrones. I never roleplayed her on Tumblr, but I have written a decent amount of fanfiction for her, and I used to really have her as a strong muse I felt very comfortable writing. She was my second favorite character behind Ned Stark. But I stopped reading aSoIaF after book 3 and stopped watching the show after season 4, and I’m out of touch with the fandom now, so I don’t really mind leaving Ygritte where she is.
6. A muse you weren’t initially very interested in writing but ended up loving.
Matt Addison (@freewillacquired) from the Resident Evil movies. I made that blog to write Nemesis initially, and I had no interest in writing Matt. I didn’t really care about him or overly like him as a character. He was just kindof a blank in my mind while watching the first movie. I did have to pay a bit more attention to him and do some studying up because he is Nemesis’ origin. Even that didn’t get me very interested in Matt. I quickly came to realize, though, that having this blog would automatically draw attention to Matt in addition to Nemesis and that people would assume I wrote both. I was this close to telling people nah, I only write Nemesis when it occurred to me that I was doing Nemmy a disservice by ignoring his human origin. So I said eh… I’ll give Matt a try and see how it goes. I totally love him now, I’m having a lot of fun writing him, and re-watching the first movie was a totally different experience recently, haha, because now I care so much about all things Matt, lol. I definitely found a muse I gel with when I wasn’t even looking and in an unexpected place. XD 
7. A muse you thought you would love writing but ended up hating.
Elunae (@queenofbethmoora), my Hellboy II OC and Nuada’s mother’s ghost. I thought this was a natural character to make and that she would be interesting because nothing was ever said about Nuada’s mother. So I could kindof go nuts and do whatever I wanted. I had fun initially, but she was not well-received and I got tired of her gentle, vanilla, and often submissive personality. Eh… I just really screwed up the idea and I feel badly about it.
8. A muse you hate but write really well.
Jon Snow from Game of Thrones. (sigh) At the risk of losing like a hundred followers inside of five minutes… I really hate Jon Snow. I’m not gonna get into why or I would write thirty solid pages, but I’ve hated him from the beginning and the more he is glorified by fans and on the show, the more he survives things he never should have, the more rules his character breaks because GRRM has decided that he should be safe, and the more popularity his character gains in the fandom, the more I just want a dragon to sit on his head until he dies, heh. Having said that, in order to write the fanfiction I wanted to write about Ygritte, I needed to include Jon Snow, so he and I got very well acquainted for about a year. I did a lot of research on him, and I practiced writing him a lot before I actually started my projects. I’m happy with the way he came out, and I’ve had hardcore Jon Snow fans who know I hate him tell me how surprised they were by how well I wrote him. I’ve also had people who didn’t know me at all say they would never have guessed that I wasn’t a fan of his, heh. So apparently, even though I hate the character, I’m able to write him very well, haha.
9. A muse you love but write terribly.
Raiden (@therain-trxnsfxrmed​) from the Metal Gear Solid/Rising video games. Another one of my favorite characters of all time, and I tried to make a blog for him, but omg I just suck so badly at writing him, haha. I think that’s why there’s like no activity on his blog right now. I just avoid writing him because I piss myself off with how terrible it comes out. (sigh)
10. A muse you write that’s canon but feels like an OC.
Nemesis (@freewillacquired​)from the Resident Evil games/movies. I’m adding so much to Nemmy it’s not even funny. In the games, he never had a backstory. I guess we always knew he was human, since he’s an upgraded Tyrant class mutation, which come from human origins, but they never said who he used to be. He was just a mindless pain in the ass that was invincible until the final fight which… is god modding, Nemmy, and it’s rude. XD Then in the movies we got to know Matt Addison before we learned he was turned into Nemesis, which added a whole new dimension. We also saw Nemesis step out of his mindless killing machine role, reject Umbrella, remember Alice, and protect her. He never did anything like that in the games, so again, we got a little glimpse of his intelligence and his capacity to remember his human self and his old memories. Aaaaaaand then he took a helicopter to the face and got vaporized by a nuke. A minor setback, haha. But anything after that was open to interpretation, extrapolation, and good ol’ fashioned fudging. I’m adding so much as far as what he does with himself now, what his daily activities are, what he eats, what he thinks about certain things and people… it’s so much fun. As a writer, it’s super fun to be handed a scaffold, bare bones character and fill in the blanks with your own imagination. He really does feel more like an OC at times to me because I’m laying down so many layers of info outside of what was provided to me by the canon.
11. A muse you want to write but don’t because the fandom intimidates you.
Ned Stark from Game of Thrones. I actually did write him very briefly on my fanblog for the character because someone thought it was an RP blog, haha. But it was only one thread and it didn’t last long. It was a lot of fun, though. He ranks very high up there for favorite characters of all time for me and he’s a pretty easy muse for me to write personality-wise, but the fandom and many of the characters are so negative toward him that it makes me just not want to bother. They make fun of him for how he died, they call him Lawful Stupid (a term I deeply resent both as someone with a Lawful Good alignment and someone who plays D&D paladins who have been called Lawful Stupid before), they say he’s not significant because he only lasted one book/season, etc. I just don’t have the energy to always write a muse who’s getting attacked for being an honorable, good person. It irks me to no end and the fandom is just so negative about this and so many other things that I steer clear. But, if you are looking for a great Ned to write your muse with, you might try inquiring with @handofhonor. I’ve never interacted with them but I’ve been reading their RPs for a long time now and they write Ned so beautifully, it’s amazing. They really do him justice.
12. A muse whose personality is close to your own.
Channe. Originally I wrote her as an outlet to freely and safely express my own anxiety, be it social anxiety or OCD or reclusiveness or dependency issues, what have you… without actually writing myself. So she began as kindof a self-insert of my own personality inside a fantasy character with real power, unlike myself. it was a way for me to work through some personal issues, and over the years, Channe has changed as I have changed, and she’s even done better with her issues than I have, heh. This is literally the only time in all the thousands of characters I’ve written over the years where I’ve done anything close to a self-insert.
13. A muse whose personality is very different from your own.
Jix, haha. I… am a negative, pessimistic, cynical, irritable, snippy bitch, hahahaha. So how I wrote the most adorable, precious, cinnamon roll, ray of sunshine, cup of smiles, barrel of cuteness muse, I do not understand, haha. I really don’t get how Jix even came out of my dark, dank, anti-social, emo brain, hahaha. But I’m so glad he did. =)
14. A muse often misunderstood by other muses at first impression.
Aurelien (@a-very-proper-shxde), my fandomless shade OC. A shade is basically a shadow creature. A bodiless being that looks like a black cloud with red eyes who’s made of cool, negatively-charged energy. Technically, I think he qualifies a type of incorporeal undead. The problem with this… is that Aurelien was once a human paladin. As such, he is a nicest, most honorable dude you will meet, but upon seeing him, most people think he’s a demon, or at least immediately assume that he’s evil and hostile. The poor guy constantly has to defend and explain himself after little more than an innocent “hello.” Even then, some muses are wary of him and it takes a while for them to trust him.
15. Your favorite muse you’ve ever written.
Jix, again, heh. Hands down. He makes me so happy to write, he makes me happy with how other muns react to him and to the stories we write, and I love to see plots with him and other muses play out. He’s such an innocent little doot-doot and he’s just so cute you could scream in a good way, and I just love him so much. Like I said before, I have no idea how I was blessed with Jix out of the dusty, cobwebby, brain with a survival horror atmosphere that I seem to have, haha, but I’m so glad that he popped out one day and that I brought him to Tumblr. He’s too fun to write, seriously. I am considering making my upcoming NaNoWriMo project a book about Jix. =) 
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