#I FORGOT ABOUT IT CUZ ASTRID WAS ONLY KIND OF HELPFUL

[essektheylyss]

Who the FUCK is the current Archmage of Antiquities, DAMMIT

#cr spoilers #I FORGOT ABOUT IT CUZ ASTRID WAS ONLY KIND OF HELPFUL #FUCK #WHOMST

[beetlemancy]

hey welcome to my Liam O’Brien is a Playlist Menace collection. These lyrics are too good and are becoming very relevant again. These are just my personal favorite parts of many (but not all) of the songs from Caleb’s playlist and how I personally feel they reflect the story - they are definitely NOT the only parts of the song that do this. 

This is gonna be long as Shit so its under a cut.

Fire - Kimya Dawson

Trent IckyThong, Caleb and Beau’s talks about changing the Empire, his thirst for knowledge, and his continued use of Trauma (read: Fire) Magic to meet his ends and help his friends.

“He says he's protecting us but he's a liar I know deep down that it's down to the wire My heart will stop if I put out the fire As long as I'm burning I'll keep on yearning (Liam has Best Yearning Face) To save the world Not sure how but I'm learning”

Me and My Friends Are Lonely - Matt Maeson

Is he talking to himself, to Astrid/Wulf? or to Trent? Rexxentrum - when he escapes, it doesn’t stop the what’s happening there. Is it stressing all the things that you have morally accepted? Is it vexing wearing clothes that you have bled in? Picture perfect victim, overwhelmed and so sadistic I was looking for a purpose, what a chance you had some with you (woof) On the street when I forgot, the city breathes when I do not If I leave it does not stop here, no

The Shankill Butchers - The Decemberists

Liam’s Obsession With The Decemberists Continues Astrid, Eodwulf, Bren. Obviously.

They used to be just like me and you They used to be sweet little boys But something went horribly askew Now killing is their only source of joy (still possibly true for other two, oh god)

Walzur fur Niemand - Sophie Hunger (Waltz for Nobody)

there’s like 5 different translations of this one so i’m gonna use the ones that fit best i suppose

Caleb in the Vergessen (to forget) Sanitorium. Trent as Mr. Nobody. What did Trent want by keeping Caleb so close all those years? How the fuck is that part of the song so damn relevant all of a sudden??

Was wäre ich geworden gäb es Dich nicht What would I have been like if it weren't for you? (i cry)

Niemand, was, was willst Du? Immer bist Du hier Niemand, was, was willst Du von mir? Nobody, what, what do you want? You are always here Nobody, what, what do you want from me?

Here - Alessia Cara

Caleb just wants to hang one-on-one most of the time. Give him some Empire Siblings Take Over the Planet time and he’ll be fine. This song is an Autistic’s Anthem, btw. Excuse me if I seem a little unimpressed with this An anti social pessimist but usually I don't mess with this And I know you mean only the best and Your intentions aren't to bother me But honestly I'd rather be Somewhere with my people we can kick it and just listen To some music with the message (like we usually do) And we'll discuss our big dreams How we plan to take over the planet So pardon my manners, I hope you'll understand (took the M9 long enough) That I'll be here

Heart of Glass - Blondie/Phillip Glass

literally just check out @luckthebard‘s meta on this, but I feel BIG SAME about it because this is supposed to be about what went down at the Academy with Astrid (or Wulf or both) but holy shit yall none of these lyrics sound Good Once I had a love and it was a gas Soon turned out had a heart of glass (wtf liam) Seemed like the real thing, only to find Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind Once I had a love and it was divine Soon found out I was losing my mind It seemed like the real thing but I was so blind (AAAAA?!?) Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind

The River, The Woods - Astronautalis

This one is kind of my favorite. Hold still, and listen, your hand on my heart If you need them, these beacons will lead you back to the start (i mean really) Liam put this on Twitter when we first got to Rexxentrum so like. Duh. Old growth, holds hope, let the brambles scrape your skin Scars are storybooks, the blood will wash away your sins (god i hope so caleb) Now let that sun slip, then let that moon rise Follow in no footsteps, listen for the true guides Woods will play tricks upon pretty blue eyes (you are pretty) Is that glimmer the river, or your village finally brought back to life?

okay that’s it for now cuz the others are more Future-y... Like, god what I wouldn’t give for “No Home - Nico Vega” to come true for Caleb.

#critical role #caleb widogast #cr music

[margarethelstone]

Alone, us two, kissing in a gentle breeze (part 1)

 Okay guys, so here I am, way too late, with my idea for another of @tarched prompts for httydartaugust (which I still consider an amazing idea, and am really grateful for bringing it in).

You may like to know that this is officially the dumbest thing I’ve ever written. But @wilderwestqueen says it’s funny, so hopefully, you will have some fun reading it after all.

Part 2 should be posted in a few days (if I survive watching the new season, that is).

Enjoy! 

Good Odin, he was tired.

After the whole day of flying around the island, giving out the tasks, and fulfilling this part of the duties for which he was personally responsible, Hiccup wished nothing more than to come back to his own hut and throw himself right onto his bed.

Still, as soon as he got there, he decided that there was way too much to be done before he could properly relax, once again putting off his rest, and turning to his messy desk instead.

He didn’t even gather that, after so many hours of work, he should have at least a little meal. Honestly speaking, he was too exhausted to even think of food; if he’d tried to swallow anything at the moment, it would’ve most probably ended in a wave of nausea… or something much worse that that.

At the same time, he was ready to hand over his own prosthetics for a single gulp of water.

He certainly didn’t expect Snotlout to be the one to save him.

“Evening, cuz!” the latter called out joyfully, unexpectedly showing up in the threshold, and waiting for no further invitation, he approached his leader’s seat. Hiccup raised his eyebrows in an ironic manner, however, he didn’t show a trace of surprise beside that one grimace. He surely couldn’t have expected the dark-haired Viking, marching briskly in his direction, to lower himself to something as unnecessary as knocking. If anything were to astound him, it would have been Snotlout showing the slightest bit of gallantry.

The Jorgenson family’s representative stood right next to him, and patting him on the back with all of his might, he extended his greeting with new nonsensical phrases.

“I’ve heard you had quite some work to do, Astrid says even Toothless can’t drag you out of here. How long have you been sitting here?”

“Three to four hours, I suppose.”

“And you’ve been up since…?”

“Since the bloody dawn,” Hiccup muttered in answer, rubbing his tired eyes. “And what exactly are you doing here? Something happened?”

“And why would you think so?” Snotlout looked like the most innocent of creatures; if Hiccup hadn’t known him so well, he might have been tricked by the sham, but then again, he did know Snotlout well.

He raised his brows even higher, and smiled mockingly.

“Am I supposed to believe that you’ve come here with no reason, on your own accord, just to check how I’m doing?”

“Yeah, why not?”

“Snotlout, please.”

“Hey, we’re family, right? Family members care for each other.”

“And since when is that a thing? I’m sorry, but I really can’t remember you paying any mind to that when you were trying to drown me in a firth, or when you kept locking me in a box with Gobber’s smithing tools. Or -”

“We were eight at the time! All kids do that!”

Hiccup sincerely regretted the fact that his brows had already reached the level that could not be exceeded any more; so he lowered his head, and shook it with disbelief, chuckling under his breath at his cousin’s poor arguments. He looked up at him after a while, and, with the same pitying smile, asked, “Alright, just tell me what it is.”

The short Viking sighed, and lifted a bottle he’d been holding. Hiccup hadn’t noticed it earlier, and now he frowned, wondering what on the deuce was its connection to Snotlout’s visit.

“Okay, if you must know, I didn’t fly all the way here for nothing. It’s just, when Astrid said you were sitting here all alone, and that you probably forgot about all the basic physiological needs again, I thought I’d pop in, and make sure you at least won’t die because of thirst.”

“Wait, what?” The dark-haired boy almost choked on his own saliva. “Are you trying to tell me you’ve been worried about me?!”

“Well, sorry I’m not going to let the future Chief of Berk die of overwork,” his interlocutor answered, in a high offended tone. “I think a thank-you would be a more proper word here.”

“Snotlout, what do you want from me?”

“What do I want?! I came here, driven by nothing but concern, and you accuse me of some base self-interest! You know what, Hiccup, I really didn’t expect that from you. I am hurt, deeply hurt.”

“Good gods, you’re beginning to sound like Tuffnut.” The young leader only rolled his eyes.

“Sure, laugh it up. It’s okay, nobody ever cares for what I feel anyway.”

“Alright, alright. Just give me the wretched bottle.”

The sore expression on Snotlout’s face disappeared in an instant, replaced with a broad, exceptionally enthusiastic smile. He didn’t need to be asked twice – with a sudden move, he pushed the vessel right before his friend’s eyes, almost hitting him on the nose as he did. Hiccup took the bottle in his own hands, uncorked it – and pouted at the smell coming from inside.

“On Odin’s beard, what’s in there?”

“Loads of brotherly love.”

“Okay, I’m sorry, Snotlout, but I won’t be drinking that.”

“Oh, come on. It’s the best cure for thirst, especially when you haven’t drunk anything for a long time. Good, old family recipe, you see.”

“And how’s that supposed to convince me?” Hiccup glanced at the other boy, unamused. “You couldn’t just bring me water, could you?”

“I told you, this is way better.”

“But it smells awful. It’s almost as bad as yaknog.”

“You better not tell Astrid that. Now act like a man and drink it instead of whining. You won’t get anything else.”

The taller Rider looked at the bottle he was holding; it was his turn to sigh now. Snotlout was right, there was not a drop of any kind of liquid in the entire dwelling, and he was well aware that he might not manage to get to the nearest well. He sighed again, and took a deep gulp.

If he had survived yaknog, he would surely survive this as well.

To his astonishment, neither the taste nor consistency of the drink appeared to be even half as bad as he had assumed after acknowledging its horrible stench – and he had to admit, that he could hardly imagine a better medicine for the thirst that’d been burning his insides just a few seconds earlier.

He felt overwhelmed by an incredibly pleasant laziness, and wondered why he had been opposing Snotlout in the first place; he was sure he shouldn’t have been.

If only he had seen the satisfied grin on his companion’s face.

“Who on Earth is it hanging about at this time?”

Heather narrowed her eyes, trying to distinguish a shape looming on the beach, few hundreds feet beneath her. She was almost certain, that what she saw was in fact a silhouette of a living human being, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t tell who exactly she was observing.

There was only one way to find out.

She nodded at Windshear, and together, they glided down, trying to make as little noise as possible. However, before the dragon’s paws touched the ground, the person had faltered, limply falling on the soft surface.

The warrior’s vigilance raised immediately – and so did her anxiety.

With such a little distance between them, she was able to notice that the lonely wanderer’s frame wasn’t the most impressive, thus, there was hardly a chance that she had stumbled across one of the Dragon Hunters.

That was the good news.

On the other hand, however, if it wasn’t a Hunter, she had most probably just witnessed one of her own friends going into a swoon. And again, due to the person’s posture it couldn’t have been Fishlegs, nor Snotlout. Left were the Twins, Astrid, and…

“Hiccup?!” she cried, when she eventually approached the unconscious boy.

She had almost dropped her axe; she threw it away now, fully aware of her actions, and without much thinking, she sunk onto her knees right next to her fellow Dragon Rider. It wasn’t difficult for her to roll him over on his back, but as she had done that, she had to face another surprise.

Hiccup was breathing quite peacefully, with a gentle grin tugging on his lips. He wasn’t unconscious – he was asleep.

Right in the middle of a beach, alone, abandoned even by his faithful Night Fury to watch over him.

“What on...” she whispered, completely taken aback; she shook her friend, hoping it would be enough to rouse him from this most bizarre nap.

Indeed, it wasn’t long before the Viking answered her nudging, murmuring with discontent; then, he lifted himself on an elbow, opened his eyes, and blinking, he began to stare at the girl’s face, obviously unable to recognise her properly.

“As – Astrid? Is that – you?” he mumbled, fighting his eyelids from falling down, wondering why they suddenly seemed so heavy.

“Nice try, Hiccup, but not even close,” Heather answered him with a cynical smile. “Sorry, brother, it’s just me.”

“Just you…?” The boy finally managed to focus his gaze on her. “Oh, hey, Heather. What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” she snorted. “I don’t know what’s been happening here, but you surely should get back to bed. Now get up, I’ll help you.”

“I seriously doubt I could do that,” the young leader muttered, and having not even tried to rise, he leaned towards her, and rested his forehead on her shoulder, snuggling his face into her raven plait.

He inhaled deeply.

“Hiccup, what in the name of Freya are you doing?”

“Your hair smells great.”

“Well, that’s very nice, but I really don’t think you should be saying that.”

“Why not?”

“Do you think Astrid would like that?”

Hiccup murmured something, that sounded dangerously similar to ‘Astrid will never know’ and jerked his head up right after. He pulled away slightly, so he could look Heather in the eyes. Their faces were now only inches apart.

Close.

Certainly too close for her liking.

She wanted to say something harsh about that, but unfortunately for her, Hiccup spoke up first.

“I’ve never truly realised how incredible your eyes are. No wonder Fishlegs is so into you.” And then, in a much more serious voice, he whispered, “You’re so beautiful.”

The girl’s eyes widened in a terrified shock. She felt her cheeks blushing, although she couldn’t tell whether it was caused by embarrassment, or the anger that was rising in her. With a resolute move, she pushed Hiccup away and threw in coldly. “Get up, I have no time for that rubbish.”

She was trying to sound decisive, hoping against hope it would sober him up a little; it didn’t do much, though. The young man never ceased to stare at her with his hazy, delighted gaze. He looked like a child asking to be taken care of.

“Heather, wait,” he whispered imploringly. “There’s no need to hurry. We have all the time we need, and it’s so… quiet down here. So fresh… So wonderful. Look at the sky Heather, have you ever seen a sky that starry? And there is no one here, just us. Think of it. Alone, us two – kissing in a gentle breeze...”

It wasn’t until then when she sensed the strange, sour smell coming from him, and all of a sudden, she understood the reason behind the boy’s unnatural behaviour; his ridiculous declaration was just another proof that her assumption was correct.

“Good gods, Hiccup, you’re completely wasted!” she cried, jumping to her feet.

She needed a moment to realise that the sudden movement caused her companion to lose his balance, and fall onto the ground again, his face once again buried in the sea sand.

“And what am I supposed to do with you?” she groaned, resigned.

She could be strong, be she certainly wasn’t capable of seating Hiccup onto Windshear’s saddle, while the boy in question couldn’t even remain in the sitting position for more than a second – even with the help of her loyal dragon, the task seemed impossible to be fulfilled.

There were three things she could do, though. One –  leave the Rider alone on the shore, and fly to the base in search for help. Two –  stay with him until he feels better. Or three – use Windshear’s paws, and thus transport the young man to his own hut, as if he was nothing more than a bag of potatoes.

Reasonable as she was, she immediately abandoned the first idea. Even though Hiccup had spent some time alone on the beach before Heather had seen him during her flight, she surely couldn’t leave him in such a state again.

The second thought was declined almost simultaneously – regardless of all her sympathy towards the Rider, she wasn’t willing to keep his company any longer than it was necessary. Loki knew what other ideas a drunk Hiccup could have.

There was the third option to execute, then. Heather was just about to turn back to call for her winged friend, when her ears were approached by the voice from behind her, “You need a hand with that?”

She literally jumped at the sound of the question, and then almost choked, when she realised who was pronouncing it.

A few steps from her, with her hands rested casually on her hips, stood Astrid Hofferson – and in all honestly, Heather wasn’t sure whether the sight made her happy – or terrified.

On one hand, if Astrid had been standing next them for all this time, she might have got a very wrong impression of the scene she had been watching, and the last thing the brunette wanted was to violate that fragile bond between the two of her friends. Not to mention her own relationship with them.

Then again, she knew Astrid well enough to know that the sensible reasoning would quickly take over whatever absurd ideas she might have got under the influence of this unfortunate sight. Besides, if there was anyone capable of making Hiccup behave properly right now, it was her.

“I could definitely use that,” she answered eventually, grinning weakly in hope that her friend would treat the whole event with a healthy amount of scepticism.

To her relief, the blonde girl returned the smile, and shifting her glare to the limp boy, she asked, “What’s up with him?”

Heather shrugged. “I don’t know. Either Hiccup decided to shake off the stress with the help of a serious dose of ale… or someone else battened on him like this.”

“I wonder who might that be,” Astrid muttered spitefully, and kneeled down by the Dragon Rider. She put a hand on his arm, and squeezed it gently, before she whispered, “It’s time to get up, babe.”

“Sss.. strid?”

“Yeah, that’s me.” She turned towards the other girl. “There’s no way he will get up now. You’ll have to help me left him. Stormfly, come!”

When she had finally managed to settle down in her saddle – with Hiccup sitting right in front of her, resting his back on her torso – Astrid glanced at her female companion, and watched her carefully for a moment, while a casual, derisive smile was tugging on her lips. Heather shifted uncomfortably, not knowing what to expect from the fair-haired warrior.

“Look, I’m not going to scold any of you, because I believe that whole situation is just a huge misunderstanding, and, that if there’s anyone to blame for it, it’s most probably Snotlout or the Twins. Still, what I have heard suggested that there had been much more happening here that I could have ever imagined; and that’s why you must do something for me.”

“What exactly…?”

Astrid leaned out a little, and smiling mischievously, she stated, “Right after I make this walking disaster go to bed, I want to hear a full report. With details.”

“What for?”

“In case there comes a day when I run out of the blackmail material.”

Heather could only laugh.

#rtte #fanfiction #httydartaugust #kissing in a breeze #hiccup haddock #astrid hofferson #heather the unhinged #snotlout jorgenson #httyd