#I did not expect such a cute moment between Luke and Annie

[lutiaslayton]

Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva

ＰＡＲＴ　１１

〚ＦＩＲＳＴ〛〚ＰＲＥＶ〛〚ＮＥＸＴ〛

Disclaimer: This is a fan-translation for the Japan-exclusive novellisation of the movie Professor Layton and the Eternal Diva. The original novel was written by Aya Matsui under the supervision of Akihiro Hino, and belongs to Level-5.

This translation only aims to be a pleasant read for non-Japanese fans, nothing more: I made a few deliberate changes while translating in order to get the writing style closer to what is usually found in English fanfictions, as the Japanese storytelling can sometimes be different than what we are used to.

＊ The Island of Ambrosia

How long had we been on the lifeboat?

It felt like such a long time that I began to wonder if the explosion on the Crown Petone had even occurred.

Was it real? Or had it been a dream that all twelve of us here had seen at the same time?

There were only twelve of us left. First there were me, the professor, Janice, Mr Whistler, the seven-year-old Melina, Amelie, who was said to be a British chess champion as well as a high school student, and Mr Brock with his iconic backpack…

And then, there were the people who had taken the other lifeboat: the former captain O’Donnell; Mr Bargland, who looked in such good health, it was hard to believe that he only had six months left to live; there was the gorgeous Mrs Raidley, and another woman, Miss Annie Dretche, who wrote mystery novels…

And finally, believe it or not, there was Mr Starbuck, the former footballer from the national team who was known as the ‘Legendary Left Leg.’ Any member of the national team was a star among stars in the whole United Kingdom, but Mr Starbuck could not bear talking, or even hearing about his past carreer.

Annie secretly told me why: his ‘Legendary Left Leg’ was tattered with scars from the surgery he had received after an injury… and because of it, he could no longer play football. He had an unwavering determination to play football once more, and this was why he was trying to obtain eternal life.

I had woken up in the lifeboat during the early hours of dawn, and Annie, riding on the other lifeboat next to ours, had been the only other person awake. With nothing better to do, we had spent the time chatting.

By that point, the boats had slowed down, and were now leisurely headed towards the island that had appeared in the distance.

I was hungry and thirsty, but still had enough energy left to talk. So Annie also told me this: Mr Bargland was the president of a giant trading company, the ‘World Fleet’ corporation, and Mrs Raidley was the widow of a billionaire as well as a queen of high society. This lady had said that she was participating in this puzzle-solving game for the sake of making her beauty shine forever…

“I am quite partial to gossip magazines,” Annie concluded, winking at me with a mischievous smile.

Annie herself was a mystery writer, and fairly well-known in the United Kingdom; even I knew that any mystery written by Annie Dretche would always be number one in the sales charts upon release. My mum was a big fan of her works.

“Annie, the first film I ever watched was ‘Murder on the Thames.’ I saw it with my mum in a small cinema in Misthallery.”

I had been kept on the edge of my seat from start to finish, wondering how the protagonist would be able to solve the perfect crime in the River Thames. When I told her, she flashed a very happy smile.

“I think it’s a pretty good mystery, if I do say so myself.”

But then she fell silent. She looked in the distance and murmured:

“Luke, if I could have eternal life, what do you think I would do?”

“Huh? Um, I don’t know…”

It did not immediately occur to me.

“I am going to keep writing masterful mysteries, forever. I believe I can.”

As she said this, her eyes were sparkling against the horizon. I wondered… How old was she?

Definitely younger than Captain O’Donnell. About as old as Mr Bargland and Mr Whistler…

And yet, I thought that in this very moment… she was thinking about death.

Maybe she had too much talent, and not enough time, to live a normal life. There were so many different reasons for people to wish for eternal life…

With this in mind, I too continued to stare silently at the horizon.

We arrived on the island together.

Mr Bargland looked around cautiously. “What on Earth is this island…”

“At first glance, it seems to be uninhabited…” Captain O’Donnell mused.

At that moment, Mr Brock began to dash off. As he was running, he was muttering in excitement:

“Impossible! Could it be? Finally…?”

At the end of his course, he hugged a rock and exclaimed:

“There’s no doubt about it… This is Ambrosia!”

Ambrosia!? I was not the only one to be astonished.

“Ambrosia, you say?”

“Or should I say, this is where Ambrosia used to be…”

For the very first time since I met him, Mr Brock lowered his backpack and pulled something out of it with great care. It was a scrapbook, and it seemed to be an extremely important one to him.

“This is a scrapbook dedicated to the immortal kingdom of Ambrosia, which I, Marco Brock, amateur historian, cobbled together in my spare time from work!”

“It’s so thick…”

“So you’re a History geek…”

Mr Starbuck and Mrs Raidley were both taken aback, but Mr Brock was so engrossed in turning the pages that he didn’t seem to have heard their voices at all. Instead, he soon took out a sheet of paper from one of the pages and aligned it close to the rock he was facing.

“Just look at this! It’s the same crest!”

He was holding a drawing of the incomplete coat of arms. And indeed, there was something carved into the rock that seemed to have the same symbols.

The professor walked up to him and gazed at the crest.

“Indeed, this looks like the coat of arms of Ambrosia. I have seen it before in Dr Schrader’s study.”

Mr Brock’s voice was trembling with excitement and emotion.

“See? It’s here! I finally got my wish!”

Captain O’Donnell was also deeply moved. He looked around the island once more, this time with a completely new expression.

“I never thought I would be able to set foot here in my lifetime… But I see now. This is Ambrosia…”

Mr Bargland’s eyes squinted… then sparkled.

“So the elixir of immortality is hidden somewhere on this island?”

At these words, everybody came still, as if frozen in place. After all, they had just realised… This had been our intended destination all along.

It was then that Mrs Raidley’s voice rang out. “Wait, look over there!”

I followed her gaze, and saw that a table was set up under a tree on the beach. Food and drinks were laid out, ready for a meal.

“Food…”

“And wine, too…”

Mr Starbuck and Mrs Raidley both voiced their excitement, walking up to the table. We all followed suit.

A message written on a small card that had been placed between the rows of treats caught my eye.

“To all participants in the game…” I read out loud.

“Thank goodness… I was so thirsty.”

“Is this a reward for solving those puzzles?”

Everyone competed for a chair, rushing to eat. Ms Bargland was the first to pick up the wine, and he eagerly began to pour it into a glass.

“Or perhaps… Could this be a new puzzle?”

At Amelia’s words, everybody stopped their hands. Mr Bargland’s wine gurgled and overflowed from his glass.

But then, Melina reached for a plate of fruit and… began to eat, carefree. I had never seen this type of fruit before, I wondered if it could be native to this island… Regardless, that was what she was eating. I couldn’t take it any longer…

“…Well, who cares, I’m eating!”

We all took Mr Bargland’s words as permission to eat. We were simply too hungry.

They say that hunger makes the greatest kind of seasoning, and indeed, never had I ever had such a delicious meal.

“Oh, it’s so good!”

“Really…”

Janice smiled, as she tasted the same fruit that Melina had picked earlier. The professor too closed his eyes when I grabbed a handful of food. Usually, he would casually say something like, “A gentleman should always watch his manners, Luke.” But it seemed like today, he would let it slide.

After the meal, I went on a stroll along the beach. My stomach was full, I was happy, and I just… well, I kind of wanted to be alone, away from everyone.

I found many beautiful shells on the beach. And there was no one to pick them up, on this desert island… Well, I could afford to keep one or two.

I could hear Janice’s voice in the distance. She was enjoying a chat with the professor.

“This all feels like a dream… The game, this island… and eating outside like this, with the great Professor Layton, looking at the sea side by side…”

“The part about eating outside… would be quite normal for the archaeological survey class.” Somehow, it sounded like the professor had been saying this as if he were actually asking a question.

“Ruins and beaches are two different things,” Janice replied with a shrug. “But I suppose that ruins are more romantic to you.”

This reminded me of the fact that she used to take classes with him when she was a student. That was years before I met him… She probably had many memories of her school days that she remembered fondly. She probably missed those times by his side.

This suddenly made me feel… very lonely.

I decided to walk away so I wouldn’t hear their conversation anymore. Melina was picking up shellfish too, just a bit further. When looking at her like this, she seemed to be even younger than just seven years old. Did this child really say that she had eternal life…?

I walked up to her and tried to offer the shell I had picked up earlier, but she wouldn’t even look at me.

I pressed the shell to my ear and crouched down beside her, before saying:

“If you do this, you can hear the sound of the waves.”

Melina remained silent.

“Well, that’s what I’ve been told, but… I was never able to hear them properly.” This was an honest confession.

“…I hear them,” she muttered.

Her words surprised me. “Really?”

She brought a shell to her ear and began to sing.

♪

Hm-hm-hm-hm… Hm-hm-hm-hm… Hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm…

The melody was somewhat melancholic, but very beautiful.

I sighed. “That’s a pretty song.”

“…The sea taught me.”

“The sea?”

Did she really hear the song just now, coming out of the shell?

I was about to ask, but the howling of a beast was heard from somewhere.

I looked around in all directions with a start. Just this instant, this had been the sound of a ferocious, cruel… yes. The voice of a wolf.

“Did you just hear…?”

When I turned my head back to her, Melina was gone. I looked around, but she was nowhere to be seen.

I ran up to Mr Whistler, shouting in panic: “Mr Whistler, Melina’s disappeared! She was right here a second ago…”

He did not bat an eye. “She must have gone off to play elsewhere.”

‘Elsewhere’…? He was so careless!

“What is that look for? She will come back.”

I wanted to object, but suddenly… I heard that voice again.

“Ladies and gentlemen, your little break is about to end.”

At the same time, a pack of wolves darted out of the bushes behind me.

“P-Professor! Wolves!”

Mrs Raidley screamed. When the man’s voice rang out again, it was as if he could see how upset and scared we were; and it was tinged with a sinister laugh.

“Now, shall you all be the wolves’ dessert next?”

“R-r-run!”

Everyone else ran as fast as they could, and they did not need Captain O’Donnell to do it. But I stayed behind. The wolves growled and slowly came closer, and closer…

That was when I was struck by a flash of inspiration. If I could try talking to them… I could talk to animals, after all.

People would sometimes ask me how I could have this ‘magical power,’ as they say… but I have been able to talk naturally with the neighbourhood dogs and cats for as long as I can remember. So when they would ask me how… I don’t really know myself. I will simply talk to them when I need to, because I can.

And in that moment, I really needed to.

I jumped in front of the wolves to protect Janice, and started talking to them.

“Grr… Gruh! Garuh! Grruh…”

In proper English… “We’re not doing anything hurtful!”

The wolves replied…

“Gahooo…”

What? Funny?

I had no idea what they were talking about. Usually, I would know for sure…?

“Professor, this isn’t right! They don’t understand me!”

“Someone must be manipulating them.”

As he said this, the professor threw sand at the wolf that tried to attack him. This scared off the pack for a small moment.

“Janice, Luke, we have to go!”

All three of us set off at full speed towards the forest, catching up with the others.

“I, I can’t, run anymore…!”

Annie sounded like she was in pain.

“…Yet you’re running anyway,” Mr Bargland huffed with disdain. “You’re stubborn, old lady.”

　⇚　　　　　　　⇛

#professor layton #layton's book club #luke triton #annie dretche #hershel layton #janice quatlane #melina whistler #marco brock #celia raidley #pierre starbuck #curtis o'donnell #oswald whistler #eternal diva #eternal diva novel #translation #professor layton and the eternal diva #I did not expect such a cute moment between Luke and Annie #that was actually cute and wholesome! #It's also interesting that Layton would mention that eating outside is a rather usual thing to do for archaeology students #Apparently part of his lessons is field work?? Even for students who took archaeology as a minor class? #and the way that he worded it like a question... I wonder if it's one of the reasons he starts to grow suspicion #Too bad that was translated differently in the English dub #that sounds like cool and subtle foreshadowing

[mytherapistsays-blog]

The Princess Switch is a Tale as Old as Time

The Princess Switch is a Tale as Old as Time ⁣⁣ ⁣⁣ @MyTherapistSays ⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣ https://mytherapistsays.ca/the-princess-switch-is-a-tale-as-old-as-time/

Or… as old as the merging-of-two-frames editing technique. Vanessa Hudgens is the latest star to sink down to join in on the low budget Christmas movie train, playing two mysteriously identical strangers who swap places and assume each other’s identities. Sound familiar? The answer should be yes, because since time immemorial we’ve witnessed many a Disney starlet in more or less the same film. The question is, who did it better? Someone call Us Weekly, because we are blowing this sh*t wide open.

IT TAKES TWO

(MARY KATE & ASHLEY OLSEN, 1995)

Okay, to be fair (barring any outlandish conspiracy theories), these two actually are separate human beings, but the identity swap principle still applies. In this 90’s classic, orphan-girl/ inner-city-kid Amanda attempts to trespass explores the woods beyond the grounds of her summer camp and bumps (quite literally) into prim and proper Alyssa, who lives with her rich ass wealthy father, Roger. Amanda is about to be adopted by the Butkises, the family who collects kids for child labour- actually you know what, it was for child labour- and Alyssa is about to have the gold-digging stepmother from hell, Clarice. They decide to swap places so Alyssa can know what it’s like to be a real kid and Amanda can know what it’s like to have real human affection, and they work together to set up Alyssa’s social worker with Amanda’s father. Chaos, food fights, and less-than-romantic horseback rides ensue.

Pros: Olsen twins before their acting skills absolutely nosedived. Kirstie Alley. Whoever the rich dad’s driver was.

Cons: The Butkises. The horror that was THIS scene.

Most memorable line:

Amanda: It’s got to be that can’t-eat, can’t-sleep, reach-for-the-stars, over-the-fence, World Series kind of stuff, right?

THE PARENT TRAP

(LINDSAY LOHAN, 1998)

Another unmistakable 90’s classic, which also coincidentally involves the same-but-not-the-same girls to meet over summer camp. Hallie is a cool, laid back Cali gal while Annie is a posh English girl. Despite a rocky start meeting at summer camp (what are the chances!) the girls realize they have the same birthday… and the same parents- wait, they’re sisters?! They decide to switch places so that they can like, actually MEET the other parent who has abandoned them for years, and set up their rich vineyard owning father with their classy but slightly disheveled mother, and also get rid of their treacherous stepmother to be, Meredith Blake. They succeed, and though this movie has the best cast and best soundtrack possible, it is seriously unsettling how f*cked up it is for their parents to keep them apart and live without one of their own daughters. What kind of co-parenting tactic is that?!

Pros: Dennis Quaid. Dennis Quaid. Dennis Quaid. The epic handshake sequence. Vineyards. London. The crackling-candy-wrapper-to-sound-like-static phone hack. Also Janice from Friends.

Ohhh. Myyyy. GAAAHD.

Cons: The cringey prank wars between Hallie and Annie that are honestly very telling of how frightening and ruthless 12 year old girls can be. The hot-pin-and-apple-as-a-homemade-ear-piercing-kit. Meredith and the lizard. This movie is not for the weak of stomach.

Most memorable line:

Hallie (or Annie, who tf knows): So if your Mom is my Mom and my Dad is your Dad… and we’re both born on October 11th, then you and I are… like… sisters.

THE LIZZIE MCGUIRE MOVIE

(HILARY DUFF, 2003)

In the best movie-from-a-TV-show production of all time, Lizzie and her, like what, eighth grade graduation class take a graduation trip to Italy (??? wtf? Is this PCA? How is everyone affording this?). Lizzie bumps into Paolo, a cute, charming Italian boy whose age I am really troubled by and don’t want to think about too much tbh, because I am already scarred from watching one too many episodes of Age Gap Couples. While Gordo is trapped in the Upside Down friend zone, Lizzie begins gallivanting around Rome with Paolo, who out of the blue drops a bomb on her that she is the exact Doppelganger for his former singing partner and could she like, assume her identity? Leave it to Lizzie McGuire to say yes, Kate willingly helping her out by covering for her (yes, hell really has freezed over) and shit to hit the fan. It all ends with Paolo being exposed for the weenie that he is (which we really should have anticipated from this lewk below):

We have Lizzie performing at the Colo freakin seum, while Gordo is clawing his way out of the friend zone (but I’m sure if Lizzie McGuire continued into their high school years she would have fallen for a Jesse McCartney or equivalent hottie of the day and dumped Gordo’s ass).

Pros: Italy. Pasta. Ethan Craft!

Cons: Paolo. No Miranda?!

Most Memorable Lines (because you can’t pick just one):

Kate: Lizzie McGuire, you are an outfit repeater!

Miss Ungermeyer: David Gordan. I think that’s Italian for ‘sneaky little brown noser with a hidden agenda’.

Miss Ungermeyer: Mr. Craft, you are in the most beautiful city in the world, is this having any effect on you?

Ethan: Yeah the cobble stones are like totally thrashing on my wheels.

Isabella: Sing to me, Paolo!

MONTE CARLO

(SELENA GOMEZ, 2011)

After years of saving from her shitty waitress job, Grace, a down-on-her-luck Texan girl fresh out of high school, finally gets to go to Paris with David Cassidy’s daughter her coworker Emma. Instead of the vacation of her dreams, she gets a shitty tour bus version of the city with Blair Waldorf as her salty stepsister, Meg, tagging along. It doesn’t take long for the girls to have a falling out and find themselves in a swanky hotel lobby to take shelter from the rainstorm that is kind of a metaphor for their disaster of a trip. Their luck changes when Grace is mistaken for a wealthy British heiress, and with some encouragement from Emma takes her place and fills in for her duties, which leads the three girls to Monaco. Grace falls for Theo, a local rich boy with other character qualities that don’t seem notable to me at the moment; Meg falls for an adventurous Aussie, and Emma just really wants to get home to her long term boyfriend Owen and install some dimmer lights. Of course the fiasco unfolds when Cordelia returns unexpectedly, and some drama goes down with an expensive piece of jewelry going missing (a telltale sign of an unoriginal plot). But not to worry because just like every chick flick out there, everyone gets a happy ending. 

Pros: The excellent casting of romantic interests (Read: Corey Monteith, Luke Bracey, Pierre Boulanger). Who Says. Monte Carlo- it actually looks really effing bomb. Why is Monaco so underrated?! I might just be too poor to even have it on my radar as a travel destination.

Seriously. God bless this casting director.

Cons: Selena Gomez’s acting. Selena Gomez’s fake British accent. The fact that I will never be mistaken for an heiress and have a whirlwind romance with a foreign wealthy man.

Most memorable lines:

Grace: I finally meet a guy who likes me for me. And I’m not even me.

THE PRINCESS SWITCH

(VANESSA HUDGENS, 2018)

So here we are in present day. Let me just start by saying, there isn’t even a princess in this movie. Lady Margaret is a duchess. It’s called royal decorum honey, look it up. Stacy, a baker from Chicago, is somehow invited to this very prestigious international baking competition in Genovia Aldovia Belgravia (is anyone else noticing that these fake European countries all kind of sound like font families?), and ditches her bakery during what I assume would be her busiest time of the year to hop across the world with her business partner/ best friend and his daughter. There she runs into Lady Margaret, who mysteriously looks exactly like her and proposes they swap places so she can get away from the world of schedules. Stacy agrees, and falls for Margaret’s fiance of an arranged marriage/ loveless engagement, Prince Edward of Belgravia. Meanwhile Margaret falls for Stacy’s DILF friend Kevin. They manage to swap back before Stacy’s competition (which she wins despite her competitor cutting the cord to her Kitchen Aid, which she only notices after the majority of the cake has been baked, which like, b*tch, how were you mixing the batter before?), only for the Prince and Margaret to have to present the awards to the winners (because like, I’m sure that’s how William and Kate fill their schedule). Though Margaret had revealed their secret to Edward before the event, the four go backstage to give Kevin the downlow. Stacy is alarmingly okay with Edward (sort of) proposing to her, and Kevin is alarmingly okay with this despite having JUST caught feelings for who he thought was his best friend? Flash forward to a year later, and Edward and Stacy have married, and it is implied Kevin and Margaret are next? What the hell happened to their award winning bakery?

Pros: Gunner from Nashville. Kevin’s abs.

Cons: The haircut. The Jackie O blazer and pencil skirt ensembles. Another ill fated horse riding trip. The mysterious old guy who kept showing up but whose presence/ significance was never really explained?

Seriously, why is everyone dressed straight outta 1952?

Most memorable line: 

Stacy/Margaret: In fact I took a nap on it. Slept like a log.

Edward: A log?

Stacy/ Margaret: Yes, dear, a royal log. It’s an expression we have in Montenaro.

Over the passage of time, the same-actress-two-characters/ swapping identities plotline has served us some of our most heartwarming and cheesy memories of film. I honestly don’t know if there really is a way to rank which is best, because they are all terrible in their own right. What matters most is that this tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme seems to keep going strong 20 years later, so we can expect another version of this more-or-less same story to make us gag/dazzle us in the coming years.

#funny #Hollywood #Movie #Princess Switch #Twins