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sweetestlamb · 3 years

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Lighting Up Your Life

Author’s Note: This one took a while and I already have so many ideas for side stories but I wanted to get this out because it was meant to be a present LMAO sorry for anyone who I kept waiting, but if you care about me at all know that I’ve been inactive because I am doing so many fun things in RL. I am truly trying to enjoy every second of my summer break and writing takes hours. Please accept this and if anyone has any ideas for future shenanigans, you can drop a comment I would like to hear them. :D

I am so happy and surprised to be dipping my toe back into this fandom and updating stories that I loved but thought were over, I really hope you guys enjoy and any possible side drabbles I add later.

Summary: "I'm late." He turns slowly, meeting her eyes. She looks at him pointedly as if he should know exactly what she means. He doesn't. He has no idea why she's talking about punctuality at this moment. How is that important right now?

Contrary to what he's seen in idyllic movies, marriage is not the serene happy ending that's depicted. They fight, her screaming and him walking away; his defense mechanism since young and he's changed plenty since meeting her but some habits are hard to break. He doesn't get far though because at her first cry, with shiny tears running down her pretty face he crumbles, "Don't walk away from me, you're my husband!" She's always been possessive and since they met on that faithful bloody day she has considered him hers. But hearing that title, one that he hasn't shouldered for too long wipes away almost all of his annoyance with her.

He loves being her husband, adores calling her his wife. After all these years of loneliness he finally has someone who waits for him each day and waves him off in the morning, his person. He'd once called her a firecracker spitefully- stupidly- but he's learned that she's actually a volcano, once it erupts it changes everything in its wake. His very fiber has been enriched by her presence.

"I love you."

It depletes the flames in her eyes, another fight about him not being home enough. Between work and school he can barely find time to breathe much less entertain a certain author and she does not hide her dissatisfaction with him. No, she's never been one to hide her anger. But this time he's said the right thing and she scoffs before slinking across the distance they placed between each other, melting into his arms her small face disappearing into his chest. He snuggles her closer, planting a soft kiss on her dark hair which is longer now, flowing down her back once again. Her mother no longer having a hold on her. He'd been proud of every inch.

"You're just trying to stop me from arguing," she whines, but he takes it as a silent victory when she doesn't push him away.

"I don't want to fight. I'm sorry I fell asleep yesterday, I'll give you more attention." He'd taken a day off tomorrow to take her on a date, but that's a surprise. Despite their fiery rows he has never grown tired of her wanting him around all the time, he feels the same but it's harder to express that. Expressing himself in general still an uphill battle.

"Mmmm what to you mean by attention?" She replies coyly, tongue in cheek.

That innocuous sentence is all it takes to make all the blood in his head rush downwards. She's not the only one who has missed that.

He groans into her dark jasmine scented hair, louder when she chuckles deeply scratching manicured nails against the sliver of skin exposed by his hip.

"I'm hungry. Feed me first before you suck me dry."

He spaced out for a second imagining just that, him sucking her dry and her squirming under him squeals and breathy moans drowning the room. It's a beautiful image. His blood boils to a simmer.

His voice is thick when he responds, "What do you want to eat?"

Deja vu hits him recalling the last time he asked that question and her raunchy reply, you. He'd almost crashed the car on that day, clamping his legs together in order to hide her affect on him with those straightforward words.

She smirks as if remembering the same moment. Damn minx.

"I want noodles."

He takes a deep breath, calming his body before releasing her. Rearranging the hardness digging into his denim, he purposely ignores her satisfied grin. He's not ashamed of her affect on him, he's just a man. Or so he tries to tell himself.

"Okay that sounds easy enough-"

"And curry. Oh and those eggs I like and do we have brownies I want that too! And two bowls of rice."

He stands mouth gaping taking in all the food his very petite girlfriend has requested.

But in the end, he doesn't question her appetite feeding her everything she demanded to not do so would only lead to another unnecessary argument and little Gang-tae whimpers in frustration when she promptly passes out on the couch after devouring it all, barely chewing in between. He had to force her to drink water lest she choke.

It's not completely unusual he has seen her put away more food than her body weight before, yet she remains as slim as ever. It's quite the mystery.

He's able to easily lift her slight body off the couch and barely contain his coo when she automatically snuggles into him with a sigh, she can be cute when she's not raising hell. So about forty-five percent of the time give or take.

He undresses her, forcing himself to look away from the lace and silk adorning her seductive figure noting a slight bump in a belly. Maybe the food is going somewhere, finally. He pats her little belly, it's adorable.

His beautiful wife.

He strips himself down to his boxers and slides into their bed, dragging her into his arms before letting the fatigue of the day wash over him and knock him into a peaceful slumber.

When he is later jolted from his sleep, he has no idea why at first a quick check of the clock reveals that it's far too early to be awake, 5:45 the numbers flash. Pushing his hair off his face he finally realizes that he's alone in bed left with only a small indent of where his wife should be.

Then the grogginess begins to wear off and a gut wrenching sound reaches his ears. Instinctively he leaps out of bed, following the sound and winding up in the doorway of the bathroom peering through the darkness at Mun-yeong squatting on the cold tile floor retching into the toilet.

His heart instantly drops shattering into pieces.

Please no. She can't be sick. I can't lose her.

The thoughts race through his mind rendering him motionless, caught between the doorway merely watching his wife retch loudly but all it takes is her soft whimpers to break from free from his immobility.

Mun-yeong needs him now everything else can wait. Even his own fears.

Without a second thought he runs over to her trembling form, wrapping a large hand around her shoulder- completely blanketing her slighter form in his warmth. She visibly melts into his arms, looking up at him with large watery eyes. Looking so pitiful he wants nothing more than to protect her from any and everything.

"Are you okay?" It's an asinine question, the queasy look on her face and the smell of sick in the air more than answer it but he still wants to hear from her mouth. "I don't know. I woke up feeling sick and I've been here ever since." He automatically swipes the sweat drenched wisps of her hair, pulling it all back into a ponytail secured by his fist as she leans over to the bowl again but nothing comes out, she has nothing left to give. "Go. You shouldn't see me like this," she moves away from him but he follows her tightening his grip. He meant every last word of his vow, in sickness and in health. This is the least he can do for her and he knows without any doubt that she would do the same for him. "I'm not going anywhere. I've seen much force, this is nothing to handle for my wife." He denies with conviction, leaving the last thing on his mind. Her eyes light up the same way his own do when she calls him her husband, pride bleeding through his every pore. She looks like she's about to argue further but another episode starts before she can and he can only rub her back and mutter soothing sounds as she dry heaves into the porcelain circle. This goes on for what feels like an eternity. The sounds of her suffering echoing throughout the bathroom, bouncing off the tiles and ringing in his ears. When it seems that it has finally ended, with a sigh he helps her up and over to the sink where she spits and rinses her mouth with mouthwash. There are large bags under her eyes and a gray sheen to her usually plush rosy skin. "We should go to the hospital." Mun-yeong isn't someone that gets sick regularly, commonly joking that she would fight away any illness that dare came her way, literally. So seeing her this way as dismantled him on a very visceral level, all he can think of is all the terrible things that can be wrong with his wife and they all terrify him. "We don't need to go that far," she argues, already pulling away from him and walking back to the room. She never takes anything serious when it comes to her health he has learned, probably from years of parents uninterested in her wellbeing. He immediately grips her hand, stilling her. "You've been throwing up all night. We can't just go back to bed, what if there's something seriously wrong with you?" He's frantic now, thinking about life-threatening stomach bugs or a parasite lodging inside her and it makes him tug her towards the door urgently. But her next words stop him in his tracks. "I'm late." He turns slowly, meeting her eyes. She looks at him pointedly as if he should know exactly what she means. He doesn't. He has no idea why she's talking about punctuality at this moment. How is that important right now? "Late? For what? Mun-yeong you shouldn't be thinking about deadlines right now, you could be severely sick! What if there's some kind of parasite growing inside you?" A whirlwind of emotions sweep across her face before she lands on disbelief, utter and pure disbelief. "How are you allowed to work in a hospital? They must have hired you because you're pretty." She mutters patting his cheek, he stares back offended and confused at her words but a warm blush races across his cheeks at the back handed compliment. "Wha--" "My period. It's late, I haven't had it in about two months." Oh. Oh. Oh! "Oh." Wow. The implication is a punch to his gut and then his heart. She's late. They never explicitly spoke about having children but they weren't doing anything to prevent them either, there were many nights they would fall into bed and condoms were the last thing on their minds. They were a married couple it only seemed natural, so the possibility shouldn't be this surprising. But it still is. Them, parents. It’s a lot to take in.

"That's all you have to say?" She squints at him looking unimpressed. "I don't want to get too excited before knowing." He answers honestly, his stomach twists into knots at the thought of them being parents. Parents. A little wriggling baby that looks like Mun-yeong, it's too beautiful to even imagine. "Well if I am pregnant, you weren't too far off." He stares at her, confused before she continues, "Parasite." He lets out a loud huff, protectively grabbing her still flat belly offended for the possible baby growing inside. She laughs at the dark glare on his face, "You're already taking the parasite's side."

It's too late to go get a pregnancy test but he goes first thing in the morning, thankful that he’s already taken a day off from work. He cautiously picks up the test with a smiling baby on the front, his heart aches as he looks at it. Thankfully he doesn't run into anyone he knows and the cashier is more worried about some cat video on his phone to care about his purchase so he's in and out without a hitch. The drive back is silent, he's too anxious to turn on the radio so he simply drives with his thoughts running a mile a minute.

Am I ready to be a father?

Will I be a good father?

These two questions in the forefront of his brain.

She's already waiting by the door when he pulls up, some of the color has returned to her cheeks but even sick and pale she's the most beautiful women he's ever seen. He's almost mesmerized by the pale blue waves of her dress blowing in the wind, she looks like some kind of goddess. Wordlessly he hands over the package, heart firmly lodged in his throat. He doesn't want to get his hopes up but he so desperately wants to see two lines. He had read the box thoroughly during the ride. Multiple times. "Okay. I'll be back. Try not to faint." He doesn't react to her jab, too wound up to do anything but fall into the couch under the weight of the moment. The bathroom door clicks shut and then he waits, he hears the flush and then the soft roar of running water and then more silence and he sits up straighter impatient and nervous. When the door finally reopens he jumps out of his seat, rushing over to her with too many words on his tongue. "It better be a boy." Mun-yeong states with conviction and it takes a moment for him to process the words before he lets out a whelp of excitement dragging her into his arms, "We're having a baby." He whispers into her shoulder, and there is sniffling and then shaking and he wipes away the moisture on his face as she pats his back, "Aishh I'm gonna have two babies huh?" But nothing she says can touch him right now, there was going to be someone who called him “daddy”.

Sang-tae takes it in stride, looking over at Mun-yeong before saying, "It's a good thing you grew your hair back, you'll look better all huge and round with longer hair." He has to stop Mun-yeong from strangling his brother after his careless words, she chases him around their much smaller table now hands outreached, they had only recently moved out of the castle to a much smaller family home. Everyone else is beyond supportive, hugging them both and congratulating them. Jae-su cries loudly declaring that he'll be the best uncle ever, to which Sang-tae informs him that he'll have no relation to the baby because he's not Gang-tae's real brother. So for the second time he has to stop someone from strangling his brother. All in a day's work. Life is normal and he barely even notices a difference. Until the cravings start and the mood swings and the emotional outbursts. They're sitting on the couch one evening, watching some comedy sketch show when she inquires, "Do you think my body will change a lot?" He pauses looking over at her, but before he can even get a word out she's already loudly responding, "You started imagining me right? I'm going to gain so much weight! Why do you keep giving me all this food?" Staring back in his disbelief he looks at food laid cross the table, ramen, soy eggs, cookies and ice cream. He watches in mild horror as she mixes them together before eating a huge spoonful. She had all but demanded that he bring her all of this crying when he merely asked if she was still hungry after eating an entire pie of pizza. It was month four and her belly was steady growing, looking adorable on her slim figure. It made him unnaturally proud to see her looking pregnant now, it made everything seem more real. "You asked me for all this food and you cried when I questioned you about it." But logic is the last thing she wants to hear, storming off to the bedroom without a word to him in rebuttal. He sits in shock looking at the reminder of her food, it scares him that she can eat this horrid concoction but he's not stupid enough to throw it away so he finds a container and puts it all in the fridge. He starts cleaning the kitchen to waste some time before he hears the bedroom door creak open, he smiles with his back turned. "My feet hurt." Mun-yeong whines cutely as if she didn't just yell at him for basically no reason, besides you know. Hormones. He knows that her hormones are making her moodier than ever but her outbursts are still not appreciated so he turns around with a raised eyebrow. She fidgets looking everywhere but at him but as their impasse continues she sighs, loudly. "Fine. Imsorryokay?" She says it fast and jumbled together and really it's been so hard teaching her to say the words and teaching himself too because they are both not good at it. Hopefully they'll be better before the baby comes. "Apology accepted. Come here." He stops washing to walk over to the couch, patting the spot next to him and she eagerly bounds over plopping her dainty feet into his lap expectantly. She lets out delicious little groans as he digs into the heels of her feet and it makes his blood rush down. The massage barely lasts a minute before he pushing her back into the sofa and forcing out more of those intoxicating moans, giving her a very different massage. He's weak and despite her insecurities she has never looked sexier in his eyes, round with his child.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

"Ms. Witch you got fatter, did Mr. Gang-tae feed you too much?" Mi-joo asks with that air of innocent pettiness that only a child can achieve, he intercepts before his wife can respond seeing the sneer on her lips. "That's because there's a baby growing inside, Mun-yeong is pregnant." He looks at the young girl earnestly, waiting for her glee but instead she stares at them with betrayal in those expressive eyes, before running away. "I guess she hates babies." Mun-yeong says evenly before walking to the kitchen, not following the clearly upset child. He sighs before going to the kitchen to start dinner, he never anticipated that Mi-joo would be bothered by the news. Once the rice cooker dings and the chicken is cooked to perfection he goes searching for the two, finding them in the background on the stairs. Mun-yeong had a soft spot for the child, despite her cold reception at times. He's not surprised to see them there, that was why he didn’t follow the girl. They shared a special bond that he wasn’t fully apart of. "What's your problem?" Okay not the most sensitive start but it's Mun-yeong after all, he shouldn’t expect a miracle. Mi-joo sniffles before throwing herself into Mun-yeong's lap. He watches in genuine shock as his wife awkwardly moves her arms away but does nothing to dislodge the small body invading her space. He could never imagine having a baby with the Mun-yeong he met before, the empty can that couldn't sympathize with other. But this Mun-yeong he knows will be a wonderful mother, fiercely protective and loving in her own way. "Why do you need a baby? Are you trying to get rid of me?" The crux of the issue, it hadn't taken much for him to surmise that this was what made the girl upset after some consideration. She was scared about being replaced after just getting a new family. "There are much cheaper and easier ways of replacing you. You think I would become the size of a small whale for that?" Mun-yeong scoffs loudly and he shakes his head at her callous words, fully expecting the girl to keep crying but instead she starts giggling. "It's weird to see you with a belly. It looks like you ate too much food." "Stop worrying about pointless things. It's nothing that calculated. This baby isn't replacing you, honestly it was a mistak--" He coughs loudly to interrupt, that's definitely more information than a child needs to know and Mijoo seems cheered up already smiling and poking at Mun-yeong's belly with awe now instead of thinly veiled hatred. "We would never replace you. The baby is just another member of our family. A family can get bigger right?" He asks gently, not embarrassed to be caught eavesdropping. Mijoo stares at Mun-yeong's belly for a long time before answering. "Okay. The baby can join our family." Dinner is a loud affair, Mun-yeong eats three bowls of food before demanding ice cream and mayo, he watches in disgust. Wondering why their baby has such appalling cravings? Mi-joo decides to try Mun-yeong’s concoction and ends up spending the night in the bathroom regretting that decision.

It was her idea, but he had thought of it many times on his own. But without asking him she shows up at this job, she is a common figure at the hospital now. They had all mourned the loss of Dr. Oh but in the end he had stayed, he loved his job though it was challenging the patients were all amazing people and they inspired him everyday.

Despite being six month pregnant and having swollen ankles he had not been able to stop her from wearing high heels, but they were much smaller heels now at least, it was the only compromise she was willing to make after his whining and pleading. He hears those telltale clicks before he sees her and it hits him deep in his bones when he sees her waddling over to him, in a soft cotton yellow maternity dress with chunky white heels and a matching micro bag that he doubts can fit anything.

The sun pales in comparison.

He walks over to greet her, pulling her into his arms and pressing a soft kiss to her brow. He rubs her belly as he has been addicted to doing lately, unable to keep his hands off her belly especially since the baby started kicking. Feeling that for the first time was surreal.

“What brings you here? I told you to rest.” She rolls her eyes at his “ nagging” as she’s wont to call it.

“I thought it was time to introduce the baby to his grandmother, that’s the only grandparent they’ll have.”

It’s a sad reality. Mun-yeong didn’t recognize either of her parents as such and he only had his mother growing in the back of the hospital.

He turns to tell his coworker that he’ll be taking a break and escorts her to his mother who has been blooming beautifully, thick leaves now adorning her.

Mun-yeong speaks first, “Hello, it’s me again. I know I haven’t visited you enough, but I have good news today. I’m pregnant. This is your grandchild.” She pushes her belly out letting a branch rest on the taut skin and he feels his eyes instantly fill up with scorching hot tears. “I hope you support us and I hope I can be as good of a mother as you, I wish I could have met you.”

His heart aches for Mun-yeong and for himself, they both deserved so much more than they ever received but now they can pour all that love into their baby.

With his voice quivering he finally speaks, “Hi mom. I wish you were here to see everything, but I swear I’ll do my best to make you proud.”

They stand quietly for a few more moments emotions thick in the air before he gently pulls Mun-yeong away she shouldn’t be standing for so long.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The cravings and mood swings and morning (afternoon, midnight) sickness goes on though not as frequently before the baby comes. Her water breaks and he has them in the car bags loaded, on autopilot. He drives carefully and ignores her as she curses him for his caution, there's no way he's endangering the most important people in his life. He feels like he has cotton in his brain the entire time, everything is hazy. Mun-yeong is wheeled off and they have to wait for her to reach the appropriate dilation and then she's screaming bloody murder from the bed, squeezing his hand so tightly that he starts to lose feeling. The nurses are all coaching her but she's screaming too loudly to hear them and he caresses her cheek softly getting her attention. "You can do this honey." He expects her to smart at the pet name but she softens before grunting and starting to follow the nurses directions, the doctor wedged between her legs repetitively shouting push. It goes on for what feels like hours to him so he imagines it feels even worst for his poor wife and then he hears the most beautiful heart wrenching sound in the world. The shrill screams fill the small hospital room and he starts bawling so hard too, staring at Mun-yeong's closed eyes. "You did it. You were amazing. I love you." The doctors and nurses expertly clean up the crying bundle before placing it in Mun-yeong's arms. A wrinkled face stares up at them in curiosity and he reaches out a single finger, watching as his baby instinctively grabs it and ultimately his heart at the same time. "You have a health baby boy." The doctor declares and he looks at his wife with barely contained glee, they had a baby boy. She got her wish. She glances down at the bundle in her arms more interested now, "He looks like a wrinkled potato." "Mun-yeong," he admonishes but she shrugs looking small and tired. She's so much stronger than him. "Hopefully he'll look like you soon." He wishes for the exact opposite. Sang-tae and Jae-su are the first to show up and Sang-tae is beyond excited, rushing to meet his nephew and refusing to let Jae-su hold the baby declaring that only family can do so. Then Ju-ri and her mother show up and the baby is handed off and Jae-su argues indignant that everyone has held the baby besides him and it's all chaos and their baby looks right at home babbling at all the new faces suddenly surrounding him. When everyone leaves and Mun-yeong falls into a well deserved sleep, he finally gets a quiet moment with his son. It's late but he doesn't look tired at all, wriggling in his arms while hypnotizing him with his mother's eyes, the rest of his features are too soon to decipher yet. "I can't believe you're here. Your mother worked so hard to get you here, we should let her rest. I don't know what kind of father I'll be. I never really had a father myself, he left before I could have any memories of him. I'll never do that to you, that much I can promise. I've only known you for a few hours but you're already my whole world, you and your mom. We're not perfect but we're going to love you so much." His voice wavers with emotion, before he laughs at himself, "Can you even understand what I'm saying? Dad is too sentimental." "I could have told you that." Mun-yeong's drowsy voice breaks the calm and he looks over at her sheepish. She'd probably heard everything. She surprises him by not mocking him. "Are you thirsty? Do you need anything?" She doesn't answer before making grabby hands at him, immediately he moves the chair closer so she can touch them both. She runs a gentle finger across the baby's head, he wiggles but otherwise stays still looking more tired with every passing minute. Slowly they both start to drift to sleep and he watches them with a soft loving gaze.

A week later, they're allowed to go home and he buckles up Byeong-ho, aptly named because he is the light in the their life. It's his first time outside and his eyes become huge once he realizes there is more than the hospital room they were confined to. He helps Mun-yeong into the passenger seat, buckling her in too despite her grumbling that she can do it herself. When they pull up to the house, he grabs the bassinet and gives Mun-yeong his arm slowly walking into the house. "Let's put him in his room." He says calmly despite his heart beating rapidly, it had been hard keeping the secret from her. She follows him easily none the wiser to what he has planned. He slowly pushes the door open watching her face all the way, her gasp is music to his ears as they both take in the room. While she'd been bedridden Sang-tae had been decorating Byeong-ho's room, lush colors fill the room now, a forest with vibrant trees and vivid skies. He smiles at the animated versions of them across the walls, Byeong-ho has been added to the camping van. His little head peeking out as they drive into the sunset. "It's a gift from Sang-tae." "It's beautiful." That's all she is able to say but he can see the emotions flowing from her eyes, he silently wraps an arm around her shoulder.

Breastfeeding is hard, harder than movies made it seem but she'd gotten the knack of it while in the hospital, Byeong-ho only stops after feeding for about an hour. Her whole body is sore, she's been tired since giving birth. Gang-tae had finally stopped moving, he'd feed her then put away the gifts they had received, helped her take a shower and played with the baby before collapsing on the bed claiming he just needed to rest his eyes. That was hours ago. "It's just you me and huh?" The baby coos in her arms, milk leaking from his fat cheeks. "You eat a lot for someone so tiny. You really must be my kid." She leans back in the rocking chair, a gift from Ju-ri's mother. Swaying back and forth, while lightly patting the baby over her shoulder only stopping when she hears his little burp. It's getting late, approaching midnight and she is starting to feel drowsy herself. "It's time to sleep." She stands up walking to the bedroom and smiling at her snoring husband, he is splayed across the bed haphazardly she tugs the blanket further up his chest before planting a kiss on his cheek. Then she opens the bottom drawer, plucking out a single copy of her new book. She'd been working on it since learning she was pregnant, it wouldn't be sold to the public. "Just for you. You should be honored, I'm one of the most wanted authors around." She boasts to her son, disgusted when he blows a snot bubble in response. "How uncouth." But she carries him back to the room, making herself comfortable in the rocking chair once more before opening the book, taking them both to a far off land where a witch learns to love herself and through that small act gains unconditional love from others. The one thing her father ever gave her and now she can give that to her own child in addition to so much more, she can break this cycle with love.

#It's okay to not be okay #psycho but it's okay #baby fic #baby moon #moon gang tae #ko mun yeong #lighting up your world #it's finally here #I want baby moon to meet GT's mom too #maybe a side story?#I finally wrote a preg fic #I literally never do LMAO

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fancykraken · 3 years

Note

AU Meme:

1. Jimmy Darmody/Richard Harrow. AU: What if they both lived?

2. Richie Tozier/Eddie Kasprak. AU: What if Eddie managed to live at the end of It: Chapter 2.

Leave an AU and a pairing in my ask and I’ll give you the plot of the fic I won’t write for it.

I'm so, so sorry it's taken me so long to answer this! Please forgive me. 🙏🏻

1. So... this is kinda awkward for me to answer because I don't actually ship Jimmy/Richard beyond them being friends and work buddies. I'm so sorry if this lets you down. However, I do have a bit of an idea of what could've happened and it kind of piggybacks on to sort of similar discussions/ideas that @runn0ft and @portiaadams have shared before, so I cannot take full credit for all of this.

Also, I would like to pimp out @portiaadams amazing fics where Richard does live and will continue to do so. Go check them out, Portia has worked so hard on these fics and deserves all the love:

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow

Hand in Hand to Hell

(this is kind of a disjointed mess because I wrote it fairly quickly and didn't flesh out a lot of things more. It also still involves Angela dying, which I hate and don't want because I love her, but I'm kind of stumped on how to avoid that yet still get where I want to go. So apologies to Angela 😭)

Jimmy stays in Chicago and things start getting really hostile between him and Nucky after a few years. Old wounds etc are reopened + Gillian is pulling the strings behind the scenes as per usual.

Richard is there and working alongside Jimmy, but he's trying to get out of the game because he's through with it all and wants to settle down.

Like canon, Angela is killed because she's caught in the crossfire of Jimmy's mistakes, so Jimmy goes for revenge but fucks up harder than ever so he has to disappear to keep Tommy and Gillian safe.

So he leaves, and Richard, Gillian, and Tommy move back to AC and things move along like what went on the show. Julia comes into the picture and Richard finally sees a real out to all this. Gillian is fucking up by opening the Artemis club and Richard doesn't want Tommy to be around this anymore so he, with Julia, go to court to fight for custody of Tommy (which he is granted because the whole Artemis club etc and maybe Gillian killed someone, I'm not sure).

Richard, Julia, Paul, and Tommy move to Wisconsin where they count cows along the way.

Life goes on and Julia gets pregs. Tommy is a little miffed, but ends up really loving his little brother/sister/???.

Jump to 1931 where Nucky is killed (by someone, possibly Gillian because she deserves that) and Jimmy comes back out of hiding because he knows that the heat on him and repercussions for his family should be gone. Gillian has kept in touch with him sporadically over the years despite him telling her it's too dangerous.

Jimmy comes back to AC to maybe, idk, help Gillian cover her tracks or something. After he does that and knows 100% it's safe, he goes to Wisconsin and enters back into Richard and Tommy's life.

So Jimmy tries to adjust to Wisconsin life while he gets to know his son and he and Richard become friends outside of all the violence from the past.

Maybe one day Jimmy and Richard are on the porch having some whiskey and Jimmy breaks down thanking Richard for raising his son better than he could ever do with all that's happened. And they hug and life goes on.

2. What do you mean 'if Eddie lived?' He lived. 😂

So, this could go either of two ways. One way where he isn't stabbed or one where he is but survives the injuries he's been given. I don't really have a huge difference from other AU's for either scenario, so it's not going to be too exciting. Also, Stan is alive in this because if Eddie lives then Stan lives as well.

(and I'm going to put the rest under a cut so I don't piss off anyone who may be tired by the length of this reply)

I'm going to go in the direction of Eddie not being stabbed and Richie pulling him away just in time after he's released from the dead lights.

Pennywise bites the dust (in a better fashion than what the movie gave us, I think). Everyone exits the sewers and is shellshocked. When they get back to their rooms everyone kind of separates for a bit to clean up and decompress. Lots of alcohol is consumed. They probably get dinner or something later and they just sit and eat and try to come to terms with everything and also try to help lighten the mood. The energy between Richie and Eddie is different now, things have definitely changed between the two but they can't really figure it out (or they have, they just can't admit it quite yet).

The Losers all go back up for the night and to try and get some sleep. Some are staying an extra day while other's are leaving in the morning (one of them being Eddie).

Naturally, Richie can't sleep because he keeps going over what he saw in the dead lights and also going 'holy shit holy shit, holy shit, I love Eddie. I always knew I loved him but oh my fucking god it's real.' So he gets up and ends up knocking on Eddie's room door. Eddie answers, obviously not having slept at all. Richie invites himself in, because Richie. He's acting super fidgety and wired up even by Richie standards, so Eddie keeps pressing him what the fuck is going on. The flood gates open big and wide so Richie recounts to Eddie what he saw and how he's felt most of his life even if they forgot each other for 27 years.

Eddie's still on unstable footing because 1) he's married, even if he's come to the realization that he's very unhappy in it and 2) he's in love with Richie as well.

They kiss and talk and maybe have sex, but if they don't things definitely happen to change it all between them.

Eddie leaves early in the morning, but not without saying goodbye to Richie and the others. They all make promises to keep in touch etc, which they all do.

Richie goes back to LA, Eddie NY. By the end of the first day, there's already well over 200 text messages between the two of them, so they are definitely talking. Eddie needs space to figure stuff out and also deal with his marriage and other things. Richie respects that and tells him he'll wait, blue balling it the whole time like a champ.

A few months go by and the divorce is about to be finalized. Eddie and Richie talk every day and are basically dating long distance but neither will put an official label on it. It is what it is and they're both happy with that. It isn't until Richie brings up the subject of maybe moving to NY or maybe Eddie coming out to visit him that things get a little tense. Eddie seems a bit spooked or vague about it so Richie starts to freak out a bit that he's fucked up or pushed Eddie too far. Naturally, he shoves it under the rug and doesn't bring up the subject again wanting Eddie to feel completely at ease with the topic.

However, a little less than a week later there's a knock at his door. Thinking it's just the food delivery guy he practically falls over as he opens the door and it's Eddie standing there scowling at him. Richie is like 'man, how badly did I fuck up and what did I fuck up on?' but then Eddie says, "Hey asshole, I just moved into a short term rental a few minutes away need to give my boyfriend the spare key."

Richie's practically passed out on the floor by now so Eddie just edges his way into his place and puts down the key on the kitchen table. Eddie wanted to surprise Richie by moving out to LA but didn't want to move in with Richie right away (or so he thinks). They still want to take things a little slow, but less than two months later Eddie is fully moved into Richie's and they are living happily and hornily ever after.

#Richard Harrow #Jimmy Darmody #Boardwalk Empire #Reddie #Eddie Kaspbrak #Richie Tozier #It #It Chapter 2 #It Chapter Two #It (2019)#fic meme #fic au #The Meme files #The Ask Files #teadrinkingwolfgirl

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sinningtamer · 5 years

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eating for two [fic]

i did it. i finally lived my dreams and wrote the preg/stuffing fic that no one but me asked for

tumblr is dumb about links lately so its going under the cut

cw: stuffing/belly kink, (m)preg (like, with a nonhuman/non’male’ character, but whatever), vaguely implied sexual content only at the very end, 1.4k+ words, fandom character shipping, but, like, very AU specific interpretation.

a/n: im sorry but also not really cause i deserve this, ALSO tumblr is the worst and if this shows up in main character tags i am so so so sorry, please just ignore me.

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“My god.” Strife breaths heavily as he slowly stands up from the table, gaze making its way downward to his stomach.

Over the last handful of months, he’d gotten used to once again constantly having a belly that extended past his waist and made the view downward significantly cover up his toes, something nothing short from annoying. Granted, it was a mutual decision, and Strife had agreed to this, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t allowed to complain.

This, though? This was ridiculous.

“You made me look like we’re having twins, asshole.” Rubbing soft circles on the top of his distended stomach, Strife glares across the kitchen to where Parvis’ is washing dishes. Way, way too many dishes for only two people, no thanks to the blood mage himself.

A nice, date night dinner between them while their daughter was being watched seemed like a good idea in theory, harmlessly suggested by Parvis earlier in the evening. Strife, however, had somehow managed to forget just how much of a scheming bastard Parvis could be. First it was just him suggesting another few bites of the food on his plate, then handing him seconds, and thirds, far, far more than Parvis himself had, and that’s how Strife found himself rightfully stuffed, finding it hard to say no to how much effort Parvis had put forth in cooking such a nice meal.

It’s not like he needed to gain weight, for goodness sake, he looked big enough already at six months. Not that he was willing to admit it, but going from less of a CEO to more of a domestic housewife over the last four years had caused him to put on a handful of pounds, and he could’ve sworn he wasn’t this big during his first pregnancy.

That on top of the meal he’d just had, and Strife felt huge.

“Please,” Parvis’ drawl drags Strife out of his own thoughts, looking up from the sink. “You did this to yourself.”

“No thanks to you.”

Ringing off his hands, Parvis turns around and gives Strife a look over, who’s still throwing him a sour expression. Parvis, however…

The way his eyes rake over Strife, though, is something different entirely, as he takes in every little detail. Flushed green face from the effort of eating too much, plus his own embarrassment, the way his palm softly rests on the top of his swollen tummy, sweater stretched enough for a sliver of bare skin to poke out. Parvis takes all of it in and absentmindedly licks his lips, facial expression turning sly, almost hungry.

Well, at least someone still was.

“Well!” Parvis says quickly, clapping his hands together. “Why don’t you go lie down on the couch, and I’ll give you some well deserved belly rubs in a moment?”

He gets a squint in return. A long, rightfully, suspicious squint, Strife’s glowing eyes narrowed behind the pair of glasses that rested on the bridge of his nose. And then finally, a nod.

With a huff, Strife turned and waddled out of the kitchen.

When he finally settles on the couch, it’s somewhat of a feat, shifting subtly enough to not cramp his stomach, trying not to bend forward at all, but he manages, propping a pillow behind his head and falling back.

As he stretches out, he feels the baby move, and smiles fondly. “I know,” Murmuring, he gets a bit more comfortable and strokes a hand over his bump. “Your father’s the worst.”

“Talking behind my back?”

Parvis pokes his head out from the kitchen and makes his way over to the couch, settling between Strife’s legs. It’s only when Strife realizes what he has in his hands that makes him start.

“No— No, absolutely not.”

As if sensing this was coming, Parvis gives him the strongest puppy dog eyes he can, holding up the slice of chocolate cake he has on the plate held between his hands. “It’s just one piece!”

“One piece too many! Parvis, no.” At that, his stomach makes a groaning noise, and he scowls. “Why do you insist on feeding me so much?”

Barely listening, Parvis picks up the fork resting on the plate and forks off a bite to hold up. “Because I like you full and healthy!”

The look he gets is Strife shooting daggers, but he’s determined.

“Please, Strifey?” He pleads, fork hovering just in front of Strife’s mouth. “For the baby?”

“You have got to stop saying that.” Is the growl he gets in return, as Strife pouts. The only reason he’s grumpy about it is because it actually works. He was tempted to ban that damned phrase from Parvis’ vocabulary already, because every single time he wanted Strife to do something, he’d remind him of the ‘precious cargo’ he was carrying for them, and Strife’s resolve would easily crack.

The only saving grace was that it did, thankfully, work the other way around, and was an easy way to get Parvis to do his bidding, in the form of carrying him upstairs and grabbing stuff from high shelves. They really were both useless husbands.

“Fine.” He eventually says, when Parvis’ grip on the fork doesn’t waiver. “But you owe me and the kid one.”

“Deal!” Parvis chirps, and before he gets a chance to react, he’s shoving the bit of cake up to Strife’s lips, who has no choice but to open his mouth and swallow.

The first bite goes down easily, despite how strained his stomach already was. Adding something on top of that didn’t do much. He barely has a second to breath, though, as Parvis is forking off a larger bite, and poking it against his mouth again, and swallowing that makes everything feel so much heavier. And it was no small slice…

Refusing to relent at the way Strife has to draw in a breath, Parvis simply keeps cutting off pieces of the cake and pressing them against his mouth, and Strife can’t do anything but accept, hand at his side lifting up to feel his still filling belly, completely firm now.

The worst part was just how good it tasted, with Strife’s latest craving being anything particularly sweet. The layer of thick and sugary frosting still tasted heavenly, no matter how much it made his stomach ache.

Before he’s able to think about it, he blinks to see the last bite of cake on the end of the fork, Parvis smirking at him. Mentally apologizing to his belly, he leans forward and lets Parvis feed him the rest of the slice.

Immediately after he swallows it, Strife slumps back against the pillow, sighing heavily. He’s never been more full in his life, and when he shifts, his sweater rides up more, exposing the rest of his stomach, freckles on its side glowing brightly.

Meanwhile, Parvis leans over and sets the now empty plate on the coffee table, sparkle in his eyes still. Almost daintily, he rubbed his thumb on the side of Strife’s

lips, swiping off a bit of frosting and tasting it, humming around his finger.

“Happy?” Strife grumbles, beginning to feel sleepy from the weighed down feeling he was getting.

“Very.” Parvis replies adoringly, bringing both hands to rest on his stretched belly, softly massaging the side, carefully enough to not hurt. He dips his head forward and plants a kiss on the top of it, and Strife can’t help but give a half upturned smile, resting his own hand over Parvis’.

“Anything else I can do for you, or is this enough?” He says after catching his breath, Parvis still rubbing circles into his tummy, no doubt enjoying just how big he’d managed to make him. Pursing his lips, he sits back up to think.

“Now that I think about it…” His expression slips back to something scheming, and he sets his palms on Strife’s knees, eyes traveling from his stomach to between his legs. “I haven’t had my dessert yet.”

Strife’s about ready to fall asleep, but the way Parvis says it makes his brain perk up a bit, blush on his cheeks brightening. He tilts his head. “You’re doing all the work, though.”

Smile widening, Parvis nods eagerly.

“And you’re carrying me upstairs.”

“Alright!” Before Strife can make anymore demands, Parvis is hopping off the couch and wiggling one arm underneath his knees and the other behind his back, easily lifting Strife into his arms bridal style.

At least everyone was getting their fair share to eat today.

#stuffing kink #belly kink #mpreg #alien boy and mage boy #mama strifey kinz

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dramafanforever · 4 years

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A neverending question: Why is one of mey stories more popular than the other? Writer’s rant.

In 2019 I wrote two Drarrys: "Love inevitable" and "Still love". They are both long (80-90k words).

I finished and published the first one in March and the second one in November on the German writers's archive Fanfiktion.de, since there is no traffic for German fics on AO3 (You can find both stories there too, but hardly anyone visits my account or the accounts of other German writers.)

The first story was rather popular. It has 52 "reccomendations" (= some kind of kudos*), 92 comments and almost 20.000 hits. Strange as it may seem for people who are used to AO3 kudos that is a really encouraging feedback on Fanfiktion.de, especially if you take in account that "Love inevitable" is the second story I've ever published.

"Still love" is a sequel to the rather fluffy Draco-and-Harry-are-getting-together -"Love inevitable". It is set 20 years after the first story and deals with topics like "infidelity", "jealousy", "memory loss", "grieve" and "m-preg" There are quite a lot of look backs on the previous 20 years and Draco and Harry's marriage. It's rather melancholic at times and very emotional, but the plot is thoughtful and there is fluff too and a very happy ending: Harry has never cheated on Draco but loves him dearly and he gets out of his depression and regains his memory, the crime case and mystery is solved. Harry finally quits being an Auror and there is hot make-up sex and .... All this might sound silly, but it is constructed in a sensible and realistic way. I love it! Well, I am the author so...

This fic got 17 reccomendations and 49 comments while being published and that's it. There was not a single rec or comment since November! However, if I analyze the hit-count, I can see that at least two people a week read through the entire 20 chapters. The story has 10.000 hits by now. (January 20, 2020)

It is so frustrating not to know, why one of your own stories is popular and the other is not. Germans are really straight-forward people. They don't shy away from criticizing others and Fanfiktion.de encourages constructive criticism. The comments you get there often include a "negative" part in which the reader questions certain decisions of the the writer, much more than on AO3.

Thus, I am frustrated about the lack of further recommendations, but even more about the lack of comments that explain why the story is read but not recommended. IHow can I improve is there no real feedback.

You might say that I already know why "Still love" is not as popular as "Love inevitable" since I listed the reason above: It's too dark, long and then too corny. And yeah, while writing this rant, I kind of got it, it helped me to understand.

But then, why do people read "Still love" from the beginning to the end. They don't seem to stop in the middle because they get tired of it. So it is good enough to get finished, but not good enough to be recommend to other readers.

Ahhrgh!

Dramafanforever

*On fanfiktion.de registered readers can leave a "star" on a story they like. "Stars" stand for "I recommend this story". You can't select stories by stars when you look for new stories. You must click a story or go into the profile of its author to find out how many stars a story has. Neither can a reader see the number of hits of a story.

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pipermca · 5 years

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Writing Update - August 2019

Where the hell has the summer gone?

Anyway, I was astonished to see that I’d logged over 18,000 words this month. I wasn’t sure how, so I went back and what files I’d been working on. It looks like my writing was evenly split between the “Extras” I’m writing for my Big Bang fic (more on that in a minute) and the Praxian trine fic. (Which, apparently, some people are looking forward to?)

Here’s what I accomplished this month:

Posting

The Spark Remembers. This came in around 41,800 words, and I’ve posted about half of it so far to AO3. Finally - my @tfbigbang fic is here!! I’m so happy that people seem to be enjoying it so far! ^.^

Demon Lover. I wrote about 1000 words for this and then just threw it up on Tumblr. (I’ll probably repost it to Pillowfort too, eventually.) It’s not a proper story; rather, it’s more of a smutty bunny that came out of something that @doomspoon888 said. It’s MegaStar, dub-con/mech preg weirdness, and very sketchy, and I doubt I’ll ever expand on it in any way. So it’ll probably stay as a Tumblr/Pillowfort exclusive and never get posted to AO3.

Long Fics

The Spark Remembers: Extras. 7500 words. Since my Big Bang fic is told completely from Bluestreak’s POV, there were all these other little bits that I had to cut from the main fic. (Also, since the wordcount target for the event was 20k words and I doubled that, I needed to rein myself in a bit.) So as I’ve done with some of my other stories, I’m writing some extra bits. Half of them are scenes in the fic told from Prowl’s POV, while the other half are scenes that were “cut for time” but told from other characters’ POVs. (Can’t tell you who, since that would be spoilery!) I’m just over half done with these and hope to start posting them once I’ve finished posting the main fic.

Mind, Body, and Soul (working title). 5300 words. This is the Praxian trine fic. I got attacked by this bunny at TF Con, and it started growing and percolating. I’ve had to do a ridiculous amount of world building for this (which is fine) and it’s going to be rife with hurt/comfort interspersed with some spicy parts. It’s also going to be long, with several chapters.

Short Fics

Must Like Cats. 3100 words. Sparkr fic, a sequel to Swipe Right. Minimal progress since last time.

One More Night. 3200 words. No progress since last month.

Anniversary. 6400 words. This is the fluff antidote to Atrocity. It’s done, and I’m just cleaning it up a bit. The entire fic was posted to Tumblr in sections, and I’m doing the same over on Pillowfort. Once I’m done editing I’ll throw it up on AO3.

#progress report #on writing #fanfiction

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sin-cognito · 6 years

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Hey @cooterblaster, here’s my participation for your fluffy preg fanfic contest!

So a while ago I wrote a fanfic for a trade with cooterblaster, and at the time I hesitated wether having Fell or Swap pregnant. I chose Swap, but a ‘mirror’ fic with a pregnant Fell still popped up in my mind, so... I thought why not participate in the contest with it? So the settings for this fic are a bit similar to the other fic (but you don’t have to have read it, hopefully!)

I chose the 5th prompt, another sleepless night.

I really hope you’ll like it! I had a blast writing it! (and I think it shows, it’s 1k longer than the other fic XD)

Read on AO3.

Fell tossed and turned in his bed. 3AM... Great. He had to get up at 5 for his job, so it meant he could only get 2 hours of sleep, if he could sleep at all. But he wouldn't count on it, jugding from the pretty bad case of insomnia he had caught since last week.

He tried staying still for a moment, hoping his body could relax enough to at least rest, but decided after a good 30 minutes to just get up. There was no point in him losing time in bed while he could get up and do stuff. He could always take a nap later, he would just have to make sure Swap didn't find out about it or he would never hear the end of it.

He went to their shared kitchen and began making himself a cup of warm milk. He really wasn't feeling like drinking coffee at this unholy hour of the night. But as soon as he took a sip from his beverage, he felt a powerful nausea begin to raise in his stomach and he had no choice but to bend over the kitchen sink.

When he stood straight again, he finally noticed the familiar hand of his roommate caressing his back gently.

"fell? ya ok?" Swap asked in a yawn.

"Swap? You're already up? What time is it?"

"i heard you so i came over to check if you were okay. did you eat something bad or what?" The tired skeleton replied.

Fell thought for a moment, trying to recall what he had had for dinner last night. The mere mental image of last night's lasagna was enough to make him retch again, and in no time, he was back to the sink. Swap immediately came to him and caressed his back again.

"hey fell, you should maybe skip work today? i mean, if you're not feeling well, you should really rest. i can tell miss muffet that you're sick and take your morning shift," Swap suggested, visibly concerned.

"I'm fine," Fell only grumbled as he was handed a cup of water.

"yeah right."

"Pfff..."

Swap helped Fell get to the couch and sat next to him. "really fell, even if it's only one hour, you should try to get some sleep. can't hurt you."

"I'm not as lazy as you," Fell mumbled.

"and i'm not the one puking at 4 in the morning."

The way Swap was rubbing his chest in gentle circles was very soothing, and for a moment, Fell thought he could go back to sleep, just like that. He was just so tired. Unfortunately, his body decided against it, as it was too conditioned to waking up at 5.

"I'm feeling much better Swap, I'm okay. I'll try going to the doctor later in the afternoon if I retch again," he lied. "And it's not like it's new, I've been feeling this way for several weeks. It's not a big deal-"

"several weeks? it is a big deal fell!" Swap interrupted him. "no, really, stay here and call the doctor, i'll take your morning shift."

"Pfff, come on, what are they gonna say? It's just that I'm tired!" Fell snapped back. Swap was getting on his nerves. Fatigue and nausea weren't enough for him to skip his job. He really needed to work a lot during his summer job to pay for his studies for all year long, so skipping even a day was not a good idea.

"who in the world throws up when they're tired? fell come on, i know you think you can go to work, but you're sick. so just rest." Swap angrily whispered.

"FUCK YOU SWAP! CONSTANT FATIGUE, AND NAUSEA, AND MY FUCKING ECTO BODY GOING NUTS IS ENOUGH ALREADY, I DON'T NEED YOUR WHINY VOICE TELLING ME BULLSHIT ON TOP OF THAT!" Fell yelled. He just hoped the neighbors would be forgiving, he really didn't need them to pipe up as well.

Instead of being put off by his yelling, Swap seemed to be even more worried and drew closer to Fell, an arm stretched out as if to touch his stomach.

"your ecto body is acting weird? what do you mean? what's wrong?" His concern showed in his calm tone.

"Nothing! It's just been here for like 3 weeks, and sometimes I get those awful cramps, that's all. Really Swap, no need to worry. If I felt something was really wrong, I would go to the doctors," Fell tried to calm down. He felt like he wasn't very convincing, judging from Swap's still concern gaze.

Though it seemed like his concern had shifted to... curiosity?

"you...'re telling me that you've had your ecto body summoned for the past month? and you think it's normal?

"SWAP I SWEAR IF YOU-" Fell started yelling again, only to be interrupted again.

"and you're more tired than usual, and now you have nausea? and cramps?" Swap's eyes were wide open, as if in disbelief. But what was so surprising? Fell was sick or something, it happened to everyone, even the best!

"Uhh, y-yeah, what about it?" The look on Swap's face was nerve wracking. "WHAT IS IT SWAP?!"

"fell are you..." Swap's gaze that was focused on his face slowly directed towards his stomach, this look of disbelief never leaving. "are you pregnant?"

Fell's first instinct was to deny it. There was no way he was pregnant.

But.

Swap pointing out every symptom made something click in his mind.

He was pregnant.

In the end, Swap had taken his morning shift while he went to the doctors to get a check on his magic. That was the only way to be 100% sure a monster was pregnant beside, well... giving birth. The results came in two days later.

Fell was pregnant. One month and a half pregnant even.

"Oh my stars, I'm pregnant."

Fell really realised what was happening one week later, in the middle of yet another sleepless night. He put a hand on his summoned tummy and wondered distantly how flat it could still be when there was another life forming in it. He was one month and a half pregnant, so it meant he was due in... What had the doctors said? He hadn't listened at the time. Some time in winter at least. It was late June, so he must've become pregnant in... late May, so a bit after he began his summer job with Sw-

Swap.

Swap was the father. He had to be, there was no one else he had been intimate with since May. How should Fell tell him? Surely the other didn't think it would be him if Fell had waited so long to tell him? And it's not like they were dating or anything. They just fucked from time to time when they needed to blow off some steam. They hadn't planned on having a... family. So how was Fell supposed to break the news to him? And what would Swap say? Fell couldn't see Swap taking care of a baby, and to be honest, he wasn't sure he could do it himself. What would happen then? There was no way he would be able to get an abortion, that was out of the question. So would he put the child up for adoption? How could he know, it was too soon! He didn't even know what his life would be in September, so how could he know if he'd be able to take care of a baby in more than half a year? And since he couldn't count on Swap to help him, would he be able to do it on his on?

There was no way he could answer all these questions, even less in the middle of the night. Before his head would explode, he got up (a bit too fast and ended up dizzy) and went to the kitchen. It had become a kind of ritual. When he couldn't fall asleep no matter what he tried, so basically every night, he would get up at 2 or 3AM and go to the kitchen to find some sort of snack. In his tired state, anything looked good and he often ended up eating whatever was left in the fridge. The pickles' vinegar looked very apetizing tonight, especially if Fell mixed it with some bana flavored yogurt. It was a shame there wasn't any chocolate left, or it would have been the perfect midnight snack.

Fell brought his little feast to the living room as quietly as possible so as not to wake up Swap and began eating in silence.

With nothing else to do in the middle of the night, Fell let his thoughts take control of his head. He couldn't help it. When he was alone like this, he couldn't stop thinking about his life, his present and his future. He didn't like thinking about it, because... honestly?

He was scared.

So much uncertainty, stress and anxiety... It was overwhelming.

Without realising it, big fat tears began rolling on his cheekbones. He did his best to muffle his sniffing. Waking Swap was the last thing he wanted to do. Unfortunately, he must've not been careful enough because he soon heard tired footsteps in the hallway, and the next thing he knew was that Swap was sitting next to him, rubbing a soothing hand on his back.

"shhh, it's okay fell. don't worry, it's gonna be okay. i'm here, okay?" Swap whispered.

As Fell was choking on something to say, Swap wrapped his arms around him and began rocking him slowly while murmuring reassuring words. It was so comforting that Fell couldn't help leaning on his roommate, even falling asleep at some point with him on the couch.

In the following weeks, a new routine began to settle for the two skeletons. First of all, Fell and Swap had swapped their shifts at their job. Swap was a night bird and had a lot of trouble getting up so early, but he never complained. Fell on the other hand was still very tired, even if he was on the afternoon shift and could sleep more in the morning. He was regularly napping and was very thankful to Swap (even if he would never admit it, pregnant or not) for not pointing it out. With his mood all over the place, he knew he would just explode if Swap made any remark.

There was another new aspect to Fell's new routine... A sexual aspect. With the pregnancy, Fell's sex drive had skyrocketed. More often than not, he would come back from work horny as hell. Yet fatigue would usually be stronger and he couldn't stop himself from crashing on the couch and taking an early evening nap. When he woke up between 1 and 2 in the morning, and after a quick and light snack, he would go back to his room and try to get rid of the restlessness in his magic. Since Swap slept in the room right next to Fell's, he couldn't use any helping accessory and was reduced to just do it manually. As his tummy got bigger though, it was more and more difficult to find pleasure by himself, what with the uncomfortable positions he had to bend his arm in.

Which was what had brought him in front of the door of Swap's room, his hand hovering over the wood, ready to knock. Fell had been hesitating between his need of Swap's body heat and his embarrassment. No, not quite embarrassment. More like uncertainty? Would Swap be upset if Fell woke him up yet again in the middle of the night? Or would he enjoy it? Fell didn't know and couldn't decide on whether to leave or stay. So he was just standing there awkwardly. And he had been standing there awkwardly for the past 30 minutes.

Exasperated with himself, he dropped his head on the door. Maybe the wood could knock some sense into him. He grunted at his own unintentional pun.

Something shifted in the room and the door opened, revealing a very sleepy Swap. His eyes were barely opened and his voice was still hoarse from waking up.

"fll? wus wwong?" Swap mumbled tiredly. Fell had a hard time trying to decipher what he had said, but his burning nether regions reminded him it didn't matter.

"I wanna fuck," he simply said.

By the end of summer, Fell was 3 months pregnant, and his round tummy was now more visible. He didn't know if he would be able to go back to his studies with how tired he always was so he decided he would postpone his last year at university by one year. In the meantime, he could work from home in an online programming company he had contact with. Since he wouldn't go to university, he couldn't go to the dorm he usually lived in, so he had to find a cheap accommodation. Unfortunately, it was very difficult to find in the town he lived in. When he began looking online for places he could go to, he was surprised when Swap came to him with a proposition. The usually lazy skeleton told him he wanted to start working in the same town as him after the end of summer and offered for them to share a room. They were used to be roommates from their numerous years of sharing a tiny flat during their summer jobs, so Fell knew it could work.

But more importantly, Swap had said he would not be at peace if Fell was to spend his pregnancy alone. Swap wanted to help him and be there for him. Fell was deeply touched by Swap's concern and he accepted the proposition without second thought. Knowing that Swap would be there to take care of him (even if the thought of being taken care of wasn't appealing to him) reassured him greatly. That of course he didn't tell Swap.

After settling in a tiny but nice flat in the downtown area, the two skeletons began their new life together. Swap found a part-time job in a bakery and found he enjoyed working there, and Fell was less stressed by working from home and could rest as much as he needed.

Now that he was more rested and had more time to himself, Fell could really spend time into thinking the pregnancy through. First, he did some research on what to expect when putting a baby up for adoption. He was still hesitant, but the more he thought about it, the less he felt capable of doing it, so he tried not to linger on it for too long. He still hadn't told Swap about him being the father, but he was beginning to think maybe it was for the best not to say anything. He felt bad for hiding it of course, but Swap never expressed a desire for raising a child, and Fell wasn't about to force Swap to commit to a mistake Fell had made.

Fall and winter went by and the due date arrived sonner than Fell would've liked. He felt the first contractions in the middle of an icy night of February and Swap immediately brought them to the hospital. The nurses would later on say that it was the 'quickest delivery to ever happen' and only two hours after arriving in the maternity ward, Fell gave birth to a very healthy little baby, whose name was still undecided, since they would be up for adoption. Fell felt he didn't have the right to choose a name for them.

As he expected, Fell was very reluctant to let go of his baby, his little souling who had grown within him for nine months. He couldn't stop looking at those gorgeous eyes, could listen to their quiet breathing for hours, would marvel every time the little baby moved their tiny fingers and minuscule toes. He caressed their little skull, wondering how bone could be so soft.

Since there had been no difficulty whatsoever with the delivery, Fell was sent home with his baby to wait for the proceedings of the adoption. He was told that within a week, two people from social services would come to see him and his baby, ask him questions and answer his, and look over his adoption file. If the baby was healthy, it would take no time to find them a new family. It at the same time relieved and saddened Fell.

So Fell just had one week to spend with his child and take care of them. Basically, it only consisted of feeding them and letting them sleep... just at completely random hours. It was now 2AM and Fell was already up to feed the little bunddle of cries, who miraculously became very silent the moment the feeding bottle entered their mouth. Unfortunately, it was already too late and Fell heard the door to Swap's bedroom open. The tired skeleton came in the kitchen silently, careful not to diturb the midnight peace between the new father and his baby.

"you want some tea?" Swap asked in a whisper.

"Ah yeah, thanks," Fell said quietly.

For a moment, the only sounds in the kitchen were the baby sucking their bottle and water boiling in the teapot. Finally Swap turned around and placed two cups of tea in front of Fell and him.

"fell..." Swap began.

"Yeah?" Fell prompted when the other didn't say more.

"there's... something i wanted to tell you."

The seriousness in Swap's voice immediately caught Fell's attention. It was so rare for Swap not to be joking around that it was kind of nerve-wracking.

"i... i've spent the last 6 months doing research on adoption, i've filed a foster family application, i've worked very hard to be sure to have enough savings to take care of a baby, i rented books about parenting, i did everything i could and... well... i received a favorable answer two weeks ago," Swap then looked at Fell directly and spoke very slowly, as if to be sure he was understood. "i want to adopt your baby, fell. i can't stand the thought of them going away to an unknown family and you never seeing them again."

A long silence settled on the two, only interrupted by the baby's little sucking noises.

Swap wanted to adopt his baby. He wanted to take care of them.

And even more than that... He could take care of them.

Fell looked at his baby's little face, as if all the answers were there. Then he lifted his head up again and looked at Swap.

"There's something I should've told you too, Swap. I wasn't sure how you would feel about it so I didn't say anything, but I know I should have. You're the father."

Swap's eyes opened wise and his jaw opened hilariously. If the atmosphere in the room wasn't so tense, Fell would've probably laughed at him.

Swap suddenly stood up and hugged Fell, practically screaming in his ear canal.

"are you serious?! i'm the father?! i'm the father! oh my stars fell i'm so happy! i'm a dad!" Swap half shouted happily.

In his euphoria, he clanked his teeth to Fell's mouth in an unexpected kiss.

Fell was relieved. He was happy. If Swap stayed by his side, he'd be okay.

Fell was in love with the father of his baby.

They parted silently and looked down at the little baby still in Fell's arms. Swap caressed their smooth cheek tenderly.

"how would you like me to take care of you, little one? you want papa swap to take care of you with daddy felly?" Swap whispered with a smile.

"burp."

#cognito fic #spicyhoney #preg fic #mentions of sex #uhhh #what should I tag?#tell me #I'll have to think of a title before putting it on AO3 #oh stars help me

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