#SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SCREAM DOESN’T GIVE ME MORE STU CONTENT

[tenitchyfingers]

Did I just construct an entire fan theory about how Chip from Serial Mom is Stu Macher? You better fucking believe I just did. And it actually does make sense (to me anyway, but i’m high on weekend relief so idk I think it fits).

Like hear me out- Serial Mom doesn’t really have a time setting but it was released in 1994 and the story takes place in Baltimore, Maryland while Scream is set in 1996 in California. Matthew Lillard plays Chip in Serial Mom and Stu in Scream, right? Well, that’s not the only thing the two characters have in common. First off, both are weirdly insensitive and kinda cruel although Stu is more extreme in this sense, and both are horror super fans (and Chip works at a video store which like, hello Randy??) and both love gore and morbid shit (ok but same thing). Also, both are weirdly into the idea of murder, and while Chip looks kinda flabbergasted by the idea of murder he’s also kinda really excited by the idea of it. He’s also kinda detached by how horrific the murders his mother committed are, although most other characters in the movie ARE properly horrified. He doesn’t turn against her, and let’s say he’s the most ride or die member of her family like, he’s probably his mom’s biggest fan right from the moment he hears she’s suspected of murder.

His mom is also VERY flamboyant and over the top, just like Stu is in Scream. And both have a weird relationship with the idea of rules, both really strict and really lax.

So anyway, he witnesses his mom get away with SIX murders with just as many witnesses, during trial (let’s give them leeway on how the trial goes, although I have heard of enough cases where murderers got away with it or justice wasn’t served based on bullshit loopholes and nonsense even though there was plenty of evidence right there and I don’t need to suspend disbelief too much, especially considering how closely the whole media worshiping angle mirrors the OJ trial and how part of it does sound like the Casey Anthony trial) so he’s like “I could do that too”, right? Beverly (mom) could get away with 6 murders, so wiggling out of more murder accusations is gonna be easy peasy (although she’s bold for murdering another person RIGHT after her trial, right outside the court she just came out of) and here’s how it goes: the poor dad, Eugene, is kinda stuck with a serial killer wife and two crazy kids who don’t see how bad what she did is, so he just decides to move everyone out of Maryland and try to lay low in a small town in California (where death penalty is still a possibility and Beverly LOVES that her husband is even thinking he could get away from her like it’s FUN

So they move to Cali and change names because the Serial Mom case was pretty big, they all change their looks and personas (which is how Chip, who now goes by Stu, is so good at mingling with other people by the time ‘96 rolls in whereas Misty, now called Leslie, does manage laying low and doesn’t really commit crimes and once she finds out Stu is the killer she completely breaks contact with him, but she won’t tell anyone cause that kinda opens a whole can of worms and she doesn’t want to (her whole moral system was pretty much fucked the moment she realized her mom was a serial killer).

So anyway, in Woodsboro Stu meets Billy, and he immediately sees this kid is not like all the others, and once he hears Billy’s mother left, given how Stu loves and admires HIS mother, he’s like, fuck yeah let’s do this because god i’d be a wreck too, thank fuck my mom is still around. And when Billy reveals his mother leaving is due to Sidney’s mother he’s surprised, but he’s even more sympathetic, like wow this kid has it really bad. So, here’s an alternative, homebrew motive for Stu, because yeah he’s way too insane from the start to think his “pressure” motive is anything but an excuse.

And then this theory kinda offers an alternative explanation to the ‘my mom and dad are gonna be so mad at me’ line (other than it was ad-libbed YEA I KNOW) aka dad is gonna be mad because holy shit why can’t I have a normal family, now I’ll have to move everyone again and it’s your fault Chip, and mom is gonna be mad because I got away with six murders with plenty of witnesses, I AM DISAPPOINT CHIP (and he doesn’t wanna disappoint mom!!! 😢)

This also sneaks right into the Stu Lives theory because that is THEIR house, and since it’s THEIR house and they have lots of money mostly due to dad being a successful dentist (hehehe Little Shop of Horrors) and mom knowing enough about the ins and outs and gossips around the Westboro police, they manage getting Stu’s alive body discreetly switches out for someone else’s and fake his murder.

And hey, he might move with his family somewhere close to Maryland now and go back to his previous identity now, since he’s innocent of any wrong doing when he’s Chip Sutphin.

#serial mom #scream 1996 #matthew lillard #SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SCREAM DOESN’T GIVE ME MORE STU CONTENT #I MAKE UP MY OWN FUCK YOU LMAO #this is how I cope with having so many loose ends on Scream #if the people at Paramount want me to stop they’ll HAVE to bring Stu back MY STUPIDITY HAS POWER #THIS IS A THREAT #no ok but I spent half of this movie (which is admittedly not very good and nowhere as good as Scream) thinking of this whole thing #and admittedly at this point I’m used to explaining things with crossovers which is why the multiverse is right up my alley #seriously though Chip DOES show signs of insanity that closely resembles his attitude at the start of Scream #like the whole not giving a shit about victims of murder thing #which admittedly makes him fit right in with all the other kids #let’s say most kids in Woodsboro are not doing okay in that movie lol #this is probably the longest I’ve ever rambled about something I completely made up in a long time #but hey this is my canon now since Scream doesn’t really give us much about Stu’s past #I HAVE MADE UP MY OWN #that’s what fandom is for #does this make sense? I DON’T CARE

[werewolfbansheelove]

What happens in the garage, stays in the garage

Summary: You always had a crush on the Riley girl, but since she was dating your cousin and had a party, will you take advantage of what goes on in the garage?

Pairing: Tatum Riley × Fem!Reader

Warnings: cheating, sexual content, smut, boob play, oral (cunnilingus and fingering) and language

You were invited by your cousin, Stu Macher to his party since his parents were out. "How many Evil Deads?" Randy asked the crowd. 

Some cheered for the movie. "Yeah!" 

You sat on the ground nearby Randy but you’re focus was on Stu and Tatum as they had tongues in each other's mouths. You glared at your cousin, very envious of his relationship with the blonde. 

"How many Hellraisers?" Randy shouts and more partygoers yelled for the movie. 

"Hellraiser right here." Stu pointed to Tatum who shoved him a bit. 

"The Fog, Terror Train, Prom Night. How come Jamie Lee Curtis is in all of these movies?" Sidney asked looking at all the movies. 

"She’s the... scream queen." Randy said getting to Sidney's side. 

"With a set of lungs like that, she should be." Stu said seductively. 

"Tits. See?" Tatum said looking at Sidney and you but you then looked directly at her chest where her nipples poked through. There was never a day where you imagined not giving her boobs any attention like kissing on thr breast area or other sexual innuendo. 

The front door was knocked on. "Oh, I’ll get it." Stu jumped over the couch that made Tatum giggle. "Hey, Tate, grab another beer, would you? There’s beer in the garage." 

That got Tatum annoyed. "What am I, the beer wench?" She muttered but you heard her. You shook your head and said. "No, you’re not. A pretty girl for sure." You said as you smiled at her and she smiled at you and mouthed 'Thank you.' 'No problem.' You mouthed back to her. 

Stu came back with a big smile on his face. "You are not gonna believe who’s here! It’s that chick from Top Story." Stu said, Tatum and Y/N stood up as they knew who it was. 

"Gale Weathers?" A girl asked excitedly. The bitch who hurt their friend Sidney. 

"Dewey?" Tatum called out for her brother. 

"Dewey?" You said out loud to him and walked over to his sister and her friend.  "What is she doing here?" 

"She’s with me." Dewey said with a smile. "I’m just checkin' things out." 

"So you did." You said sarcastically smiling. 

"Now leave, and take your media muff with you." Tatum finished your statement. You two smiled at each other again.  

You watched Dewey interacting with Sidney not seeing that Tatum walked away from you. But you saw Tatum heading to the garage. You didn’t want her to be alone since they’re a killer in Woodsboro and don’t want her to fall victim.

But you could get her alone away from your cousin. So you followed her to the garage and you opened the door and blocked the door with a hammer to keep the door a smidge open, since the door would lock and someone would have to unlock the door from inside the house. 

Tatum grabbed a few beer bottles as you approached her from behind and trailed your hands on her arm making sure she doesn’t drop the beers. You even trailed a few neck kisses that Tatum smirked. "Stu, come on." Tatum mumbled. 

"I’m not Stu." You said and it caused Tatum to turn around with wide eyes and you stood quite close to her. 

『18+ Starts here』

You pushed Tatum against the fridge and put a hand over her mouth. "You deserved to be appreciated. Stu doesn’t give you a lot of attention but I always do. You know I have always liked you. But when you started dating my cousin I was hurt." You said and you took some of the beers and put them on the ground. 

Tatum grabbed the hand that covered her mouth. "I know what you’re doing but I don’t want to hurt Stu." Tatum said. 

"Oh please, I know Stu. If he loved you, you would tell you where he has been for the past few days. Besides he’s hosting his party, what he doesn’t know can’t hurt him." Y/N smirked at the girl but Tatum did nod and said. "Yeah, that’s true. I mean if it’s just a one time, I wouldn’t mind." Tatum responds. 

"Sweet." You said smiling but it was mostly a smirking smile. You got to your knees and luckily you were wearing pants so you wouldn’t be hurting your knees. When you were getting to your knees, you trailed your hands from her shoulders to her legs. 

Tatum opened her legs a bit but you pulled her orange short pencil skirt up to her waist as you kissed the girl's thighs, you even kissed Tatum’s covered area. That made Tatum let out a gasping moan, you kissed her private again as you reached up and pulled her undies down and left them by her ankles. 

You looked up at the girl's face and you kissed her thighs, before you latched your lips to her clitoris. Tatum’s mouth opened and her eyes widened but she let out a breathless moan. Tatum looked down at you with your eyes closed, your lips were still on her private but then you got your tongue involved that Tatum was almost squealing out of pleasure. 

Your hands were on her waist that you moved your left hand to her clitoris, rubbing the area, but soon you put your pointer finger in her, which she moaned but squealed. You smiled at her, you moved your finger in and out but didn’t removed it from inside her. Then you added your middle finger in her, that made Tatum squirm a bit but still moaned. 

With two fingers in her private, you leaned back in and kissed the clitoris and then steered the living process again, you sucked harder on her clit. Y/N curled her fingers inside of Tatum until you felt that certain rough patch and tighten. "You’re squeezing baby, let my fingers loose a bit." You ordered. 

"I can’t, I'm ready to CUM!" Tatum then screamed out and moaned. But you continued the motion of your fingers in her, it made Tatum squirm and squeal in pleasure. Even turned her head side to side, she held the edge of the fridge door. 

On your fingers, you felt something coming in Tatum’s area and removed your fingers out but you rubbed the pussy and soon the blonde came and you wiped your hand on your knee and then got up. 

You squeezed Tatum’s boobs together and lifted up her shirts to reveal her bare boobs then you ran your tongue over both boobs even kissing in between both boobs. Y/N put her focus on one boob and have it kisses and locked the whole boob them did the same treatment on the other. 

Tatum moaned again by the treatment she was getting, she even messed up your hair. You sucked on her left boob and pulled away when it made a pop sound. You then sucked on her right boob and again made the popping sound. You licked both nipples and gave them one last kiss. 

You stood up straight and fixed up your hair and pulled down her shirt to cover the boobs. “Like you said, just a one time thing, I'm fine with it.” You said and went to leave.

But Tatum stopped you and looked at you.  “I actually wouldn’t mind going again another day. I liked it.” Tatum smirked at you and you smirked back at her. You both left the garage, but went separate ways so Stu wouldn’t noticed. But you took the beers and handed them to Tatum. 

#scream imagine #tatum riley #tatum riley imagines #scream x reader #scream smut #gxg smut #scream x you

[fernweh-writes]

What about slashers with a S/O who’s insecure so they keep their shirt on during sex 👀👀👀

I also love your writing so much, it’s so good I-

I hope you all know that if you give me a compliment that I start planning our wedding. Anyways, here you go hun

-Fern

Warnings: NSFW content, female reader, mentions of kidnapping w/Asa and slight non-con with him to

Slashers With an S/O Who Keeps Their Shirt On During Sex

Michael Myers

Surprisingly, he is one of the most understanding. Michael gets what it’s like to want to hide parts of yourself in order to feel safe and secure so he’s more than okay with you keeping your shirt on. After all, he keeps the mask on during sex, why couldn’t you wear a shirt.

Expects you to be okay with the mask staying on since you like keeping your shirt on. Don’t be a hypocrite y/n.

However, once you finally feel okay ditching the shirt is when Michael will decide to ditch the mask around you. Think of it as him leveling the playing field. Both of you are bearing your insecurities to each other, becoming completely exposed and open to each other. For the first time, Michael will take things slow and gentle. Congratulations, you have unlocked love making instead of primal fucking.

Once Michael takes his mask off around you there’s no going back, not that there was really any going back before either. Now you’re not only his, you’re his permanently. here is no leaving or moving on.

Bo Sinclair

Bo may come off as cocky and arrogant but really, he’s just hiding insecurities himself. So if he cares about you, he’s not going to push you to completely expose yourself to him not matter how badly he wants to see all of you.

Will give you one of his old shirts to wear while he fucks you. If you’re going to war something it’s going to be something that still proves to him that you’re his. Besides, he also likes the idea of taking his shirts back after he’s completely wrecked you while you’ve worn them.

He may not be able to look but he’s most definitely still going to touch. Bo will slide his hands up under your shirt to grope you and tease your nipples with his fingers, anything to get you to keep making those pretty noises for him.

Once you finally feel comfortable taking your shirt off during sex, he does nothing but praise you for once. He never wants to see you with a shirt on ever again while he’s fucking you and if that means no lewd teasing and degrading for once then so be it.

Vincent Sinclair

Once again, a slasher that is very understanding of your insecurities. Vincent is insecure about his body as well as his face. (Cause why else would you wear thick baggy sweaters surrounded by hot wax and lit candles in Louisiana)

In fact, the first time you and Vincent have sex both of you stay mostly clothed. Over time, both of you begin to strip down more but he knows better than to make a grab for your shirt. He’s to sweet though so he wouldn’t try some shit like that.

This man absolutely worships your body. He does have to show his muse how much he appreciates them after all.

If you ever decide to take your shirt off he makes sure to let you know how much he loves you and the way you look, even though he can’t express it verbally.

Loves when you wear one of his sweaters. Your completely blissed out look while make fists around the sleeves that are to long on you as you make all those pretty sounds could drive him mad.

Thomas Hewitt

The fact you feel insecure around him and feel the need to hide your body makes him pretty upset. Of course he’s not upset with you, he’s just upset you don’t see yourself the way he sees you.

Does his best to communicate to you how much he loves you, how pretty he thinks you are, how much he cares for you. Thomas just wants you to feel comfortable and confident when you;re around him.

Still, he doesn’t push you to do something you’re not comfortable it’s. He understands what it’s like to want to hide the parts of you that you don’t like, the parts other people have ridiculed and made fun of.

When you finally do take your shirt off, he goes crazy. Have fun attempting to walk literally ever again. This man will give you a whole new definition for the phrase “rearranging your guts.”

Brahms Heelshire

He’s a complete brat about everything, and while he won’t try and take your shirt off, he’s not going to pretend he’s happy about it. Often begs you to take it off as he’s brutally thrusting into you. Not gonna happen Brahmsy.

Again, he may not look but he can touch and he’s going to take full advantage of that. It’s not his fault you whine and make such pretty noises for him whenever he sneaks his hands up under your shirt.

In the winter, he’ll wrap his cardigan around you as well. The old house can be hard to keep heated and he doesn’t want you to get cold. You should think him for working so hard to keep you warm.

When you feel comfortable enough to be completely naked in front of him he makes sure to fuck you dumb. He won’t stop until you’ve cum multiple times and struggle to form sentences. You’ll be shaking and covered in both cum and sweat by the time he’s through with you.

It’s not like it was anything he hasn’t seen before considering he just stalks you all of the time. But still, he wants to see every part of you and that stupid shirt of yours always got in the way of that.

Stu Macher

He’s surprisingly chill about the whole thing. While he is absolutely dying to see you completely naked he’s not going to shame you for feeling insecure. You’re still going to get lots of compliments and praise from him while he fucks you whether you’re wearing a shirt or not.

Will make sure that your comfortable with everything that happens. He loves you and doesn’t want you to not enjoy anything that happens in he bedroom so he’s always asking for your permission before he does anything.

Won’t make any comments if you tell him about something that would help you feel more secure or safe. Want the lights off if you’re going to take your shirt off? He’s more than okay with it, he’s had plenty of practice for navigating through the dark.

His goal is to make you scream and he’s not gonna let your shirt get in the way of that. Expect for him to still tease your hardened nipples through your shirt, will even suck on them through your shirt, he doesn’t care.

Billy Loomis

He dated Sydney for a decent amount of time, this isn’t his first rodeo with a “the clothes stay on rule.” Of course, he would never tell you that. Besides, at least he still gets to fuck you even if you do want to keep your shirt on.

Billy is the most likely to have a conversation with you about how he can make you feel more comfortable. He may be a psychopath but he really can be loving and considerate towards the people he really cares about.

He’s not going to pretend like he doesn’t want to see you completely naked. He’s a smooth talker so you can bet that he’s going to be flirting and doing his best to convince you to just let him slip your shirt over your head. Like pls, just a quick peak.

If you ever decide to take your shirt off he does nothing but compliment you. Of course those compliments still come with a bit of degrading but if you’re dating Billy you’re used to being called his pretty little slut.

Jesse Cromeans

If you’re going to keep your shirt on he’s going to make sure that it’s some fancy designer shirts. Or better yet, one of his fancy designer shirts that is way to big on you. He would love nothing more to fuck you while you’re wearing one of his shirts.

Understands your insecurity and doesn’t try and push past your boundaries. Jesse has enough fun pushing your physical boundaries during sex. You’re most definitely always sore the next day.

Jesse would love to film you while he pounds into you but if he knows that you’re insecure he’s not going to ask. He doesn’t want you to feel pressured into doing something and knows it’s something you most likely wouldn’t be comfortable doing anyways if you’re insecure. He knows that he would hate for you to pressure him into taking his mask off, so he would never put you in that kind of position.

If you ever feel comfortable enough to take off your shirt he goes out of his way to make sure you’re comfortable the whole time. Jesse will make sure to constantly check in on you and make sure you’re okay with everything.

Asa Emory

He’s the worst one considering that he kidnaps you, so it’s not like you have much of a say in what happens. Whatever Asa wants from you, he’s going to get from you whether it be the easy way or the hard way.

If he cares about you enough to bring you to his home, then he’s more likely to listen when you express your insecurities and discomfort with being completely nude.

But if he decides he wants to see you completely bared to him while your locked up in his hotel then he’s just going to cut your shirt off with that knife of his and that’s that.

At the end of the day, Asa will always be a sadist and thrives off of your fear and embarrassment. It would take a lot for him to listen to your requests since he pretty much views you as nothing more than an exotic pet.

#slashers #slasher x reader #slasher x you #slasher smut #michael myers x reader #michael myers #bo sinclair x reader #bo sinclair #vincent sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair #house of wax #thomas hewitt x reader #thomas hewitt #brahms heelshire x reader #brahms heelshire #billy loomis x reader #billy loomis #stu macher x reader #stu macher #ghostface x reader #ghostface #scream #jesse cromeans x reader #jesse cromeans #chromeskull x reader #chromeskull #asa emory x reader #asa emory #the collector x reader #the collector

[hamburgerhelpersotherhand]

Could you write an imagine were Yandere Randy Meeks being obsessed with an GN actor that stars in horror movies mostly?. He has posters , magazines of photoshoots that the reader has been in .Also he owns every movie that they've been in.

The reader goes to his school ,but since they're even more popular than Billy and Stu ,they never talk. One day the reader goes to one of Stu's parties , Randy finds the reader making out with Tatum (who is single)

I hope you accept my request!!!

Thank you for requesting! I’m really into Scream so, of course I’m jumping on any opportunity to write about it 😔💝

It’s cut pretty short but I hope it still meets your expectations 💕

Warnings: Stalking, mentioned non-con, and loose ending.

You weren’t a big name out there— in Hollywood- but you were the biggest name in Woodsboro.

You were this small town’s very own celebrity and you were one of the good ones, too. Not like those who move to big cities to follow even bigger dreams, no. You always came back for the new semester and you always stayed humble.

It’s admirable, really. And that’s just what Randy Meeks is doing... admiring. He’s a cinephile, after all. A movie buff. He’s gotta see every film at least once before he dies, so it’s a no brainer he’d see yours eventually.

You’re a horror actor. One the studio picked up to surprise audiences— nobody suspects the unknown actor to be the last one standing, after all. And holy shit do you look good covered in blood.

When your movies were turned into vhs tapes, Randy stocked them on the shelves of the local video store he somehow still worked at. He’d pocket a copy every time. You never stepped foot in there, to no surprise. During the fall season, your face was plastered on nearly every surface. It would creep him out too, if he was you.

Randy doesn’t read much, but he grew an unhealthy habit of buying any magazine that would simply mention your name. The teen issues always had posters. He liked those, but he enjoyed the exclusive photoshoots even more. They were mainly to promote the movies you starred in, but boy were they something else. You just can’t get away with the same stuff on a magazine poster. He kept those under his bed. To, you know... admire. But— you- you were never suggestive in any of them. The real teasing was from the movies themselves.

On a particularly cool night, Stu decided to host a party. Randy almost declined his invitation, ready to stay home and binge a series he’d seen more than once, until he heard you were making an appearance at the Macher residence. He doesn’t know how you had agreed to any of it— you always seemed like the type to avoid parties and you didn’t know a single person from his circle- but he was all for it. There was no other greater opportunity to approach you than that very night.

The party started off slow, not a lot of people were keen on arriving early (or while the sun was still up), but sure enough the number of guests soon snowballed. Randy had spotted you when you had arrived and kept his eyes glued to your head. You were greeted by so many people, it was almost impossible to miss.

Randy took a swig of his beer.

Tatum split from her friend Sidney quick and approached you quicker. Her hands were all over you in a second, dragging you around the house. It was supposedly to show you around, but Randy didn’t feel good about it.

He followed at a distance, pretending to converse with Stu’s other friends.

Tatum was basically glued to you the entire night, giving Randy no room to get you alone. It made him want to squeeze his glass bottle ‘til it popped.

Before he knows it, you’re drunk and she’s sitting you on the couch.

At this point, people had started to leave. Things were settling and Stu wanted to pop in a movie while everyone else finished up the snacks.

As Stu was fiddling with the VHS, Randy watched Tatum gradually get closer and closer. Way too close.

You both lean in... and there’s a peck.

Randy has a white knuckle grip on his drink as he watches with widened eyes. He’s mad.

Sidney grabs his arm, only partially taking his attention off of the events unfolding on the couch.

“Have you seen Tatum?” Sidney asks him.

Randy points with his drink and Sidney spots the two of you getting a little too comfortable out in the open.

She sighs and pulls on his arm again.

“Could you drive me home? Tatum was my ride.”

“I hitched a ride with Stu. Don’t have a car.” Randy replies in an almost whispery fashion. He wouldn’t want to drive Sidney home anyway, not when Tatum is taking advantage of you like that. It boils his blood to see it, but he hasn’t the courage to intervene.

Stu finally gets a movie playing and snatches the remote. He plops down on the sofa, right next to the couch where you and Tatum are having your disgusting little make-out session.

It’s not the beginning of the film, actually very close to the end. The scene... he’s watched your films so many times that he recognizes it almost immediately and it would seem you do too.

You pull away from Tatum, while she attacks your neck with love-bites, and watch the screen.

The scene before you is from a movie you’ve starred in. And it seems to be making you uncomfortable.

“Oh, that’s in poor taste.” Sidney says, watching the television.

The contents of the scene are very graphic, Randy would even go as far as to say the implications at the end are even worse. But... the sequel lets you make it out alive, give or take a couple sanity points.

Stu sees your discomfort and laughs.

“Look at the way the big bad groped you! Doesn’t feel like acting to me.”

“Stu, leave them alone. You’re making things weird.” Tatum speaks out, probably because Stu’s butting into her kissing session.

All the while Randy is watching your reaction to the screen. You genuinely look hurt as you watch the scene play, it makes him wonder what really happened on set.

“I’m going home.” You finally state and Randy’s heart starts beating again.

Tatum whines, tells you she’s sorry about Stu and Stu just gives you a haunting grin. Sidney doesn’t talk to you, just waves, and neither does Randy, though he doesn’t wave. They then watch you get up, grab your coat, and leave.

But, this is his chance. Randy could approach you right now and comfort you. Could he do that? Does he know how to comfort someone right now? He’s not sure but, a couple minutes after you leave, he tells everyone he’ll be right back.

On his way out the door, he wonders if he’s a bad liar.

#ghostface x reader #yandere x reader #yandere #ghostface #randy meeks x reader #randy Meeks #stu macher #ask

[fullmetalirin]

FMA Brotherhood: Episode 19

FMA Brotherhood Episode 19: "Death of the Undying"

Kain Fuery manages to save Hawkeye, with Mustang coming to defeat Gluttony. Alphonse meets up with the group and they pursue Barry, who chases his body into the depths of the third laboratory. The group splits into two teams. Mustang and Havoc are ambushed by Lust, resulting in both men being grievously wounded and left for dead. Lust then confronts Barry, slicing him to pieces. Hawkeye, believing Mustang to be dead, desperately shoots Lust repeatedly with minimal effect. Before Lust can kill Hawkeye, Mustang appears, having cauterized his wounds, he repeatedly incinerates Lust until her philosopher's stone is depleted. No longer able to regenerate, she crumbles to ash. Barry's soul survives, but his blood seal is scratched out by his human body, which kills both of them. Edward returns to Resembool and heads toward the Rockbell residence where he sees his father Van Hohenheim at the grave of his mother Trisha Elric.

Mustang flashes back to Hughes' death when Riza doesn't respond and freaks out.

Then we cut back to Ling expositing. Oh joy.

Gluttony is strangling Riza. She's emptied her clip into his head but he's not dying. It's pretty gruesome, we see his wrecked eyeball. She empties another clip and pushes him back a little, but they're out of ammo again. For some reason, they just stand there like idiots instead of running. Fortunately, Mustang steps out of his teleporter and uses magic to generate force out of nothing to throw Gluttony out the window.

Riza yells at Mustang for saving her because lolwomen. Later she does thank him and then he's the one telling her to keep in professional, because women are just crazy nagging hags who don't say what they mean and need strong manly men to keep their heads in the game.

I really don't like the cracked-skin effect on the homunculi. It looks so fake, like a low-res CGI model.

How did Alphonse know where they were? Did Ling tell him?

Al informs them about homunculi's powers. Despite this they're going to continue to waste all their ammo shooting Lust later, because they're idiots.

Mustang uses Barry's rampage as an excuse to investigate the laboratory, which is clever. Barry doesn't kill anyone because serial killers are such polite people. Al has cartoon face during this, which I guess is appropriate since he really doesn't fit in here.

Lust shows up and Havoc gets distracted by her jiggle physics when he looks at her tattoo. As Tumblr helpfully explained to me, this is actually groundbreaking feminist representation because while it looks indistinguishable from normal anime objectification see it's actually making fun of Havoc for being a pervert and no, Tumblr, it's pandering. Perv pandering doesn't stop being perv pandering just because a woman drew it. But okay, sure, it's not that bad by the very, very low standards of anime, so maybe I can put up with it as long as it doesn't…

…do… that.

Guys, this is not making fun of perverts. Havoc is a hero and Lust is a villain. This is letting perverts be in on the joke. Tumblr, please for the love of God shut up about Brotherhood being so tasteful in its depiction of boobs, because it's not.

Anyway. Lust taunts Mustang about Hughes' death and then… looks actually pained when he shoots her (where Gluttony barely flinched). Why did she do that if bullets actually hurt her.

There is some gross banter about getting Lust on her knees. I'm sure this has also, through some strange Tumblr alchemy, been transformed into groundbreaking feminism.

Then Lust shows off her Philosopher's Stone because the author needed a way for the characters to learn a homunculus' weakness and couldn't think of a way to do it that didn't involve handing Lust the idiot ball. I've heard this is slightly less stupid in the manga and she only does this after Havoc gets injured, is that true?

Like I said before, this reveal utterly baffles me. So after all that buildup, the homunculi are just... monsters powered by magic. That’s so boring. They can no longer be used to ask questions about personhood and humanity -- I mean, maybe they could if the show actually committed to them being alien and different, but it doesn’t. What this comes down to is just that Philosopher’s Stones and rulebreaking magic is cool, so the homunculi have them so they can be cool boss monsters. Except they’re not cool. In OG, they were puzzles that required special knowledge and preparation to defeat; that’s cool. In Brotherhood, as we’re going to see, you beat the homunculi by just punching them in the face until the author decides they’ve run out of HP. They’re just damage sponges. And just as I revile damage sponges in video games, I revile them in TV shows too. Characters just throwing the same attacks at each other for five episodes is not interesting.

I also hate that this means Philosopher’s Stones are absolutely everywhere in this continuity instead of something actually special, a theme that will continue.

Lust says homunculi still have human feelings. Wow, what a dumb idea that no one would ever want to read about. It sure is a good thing Brotherhood decided to completely forget about this and just make homunculi boring boss monsters, huh?

Then, despite Lust using her claws as instant-kill ranged attacks in every prior fight scene, she now switches to sloppy, easily-dodged melee swipes, because Lust is really hogging the idiot ball today.

Mustang says he can decompose the water into hydrogen and oxygen to create an explosion even with wet gloves. This is totally inconsistent with what we're previously told, which is that creating oxygen is the easy part for him. He shouldn't need a spark to manipulate the air content, that should be a separate thing. This just seems like the author showing off a trick she remembered from chemistry class. It sure would be interesting if alchemy actually worked like this all the time, but Mustang never needs to do anything like this elsewhere.

Then despite having just been told that homunculi don't die when they are killed they walk right back into the room, because the idiot ball's really getting around today.

Cartoon when Mustang complains about being treated like a match. Because a climactic battle is definitely the time for that.

Then Lust FINALLY uses her spear-claws and stabs Havoc through the spine which, in a rare appearance of consequences, actually does paralyze him until the epilogue when Dr. Deus ex Machina heals him because consequences are for losers. I'm also a bit unclear on how she severed his spine without also severing his aorta.

Mustang realizes he can use Lust's Philosopher's Stone to heal Havoc and rips it out of Lust's chest. Lust screams in agony, implying this does actually hurt her, so again, why did she show it to him?

Lust's body disintegrates, but she's able to reform around the Stone. It's really gruesome. Somehow this does not crush Mustang's hand in the process, but she does finally stab him… nonfatally, because she's got the idiot ball again.

Bradley shows up outside.

Lust says Mustang was a candidate for sacrifice but she's killing him anyway. Uh, did she run this by the others? She then leaves him for dead instead of finishing him off because the idiot ball is strong this episode.

We then catch up to Barry, who tells us souls reject incompatible bodies. Al freaks out at this, but fortunately this will never matter for him.

Lust shows up to whine about how she has to kill Al. No, you don't. Just leave. You control the government. Bradley can give you another hideout at a moment's notice. The most important thing hiding here was you, and you just blabbed all your secrets anyway. Just cut your losses. You idiot.

Lust once again taunts someone into shooting her and once again staggers and screams in pain, because the idiot ball's terminal now. Shouldn't she also know she's running out of lives and this is maybe not the best idea right now?

Al vows to protect Riza because he’s tired of watching people die. It’s a nice moment that also happens way, way too early in his character arc. I like Al as the childish, out-of-his-depth foil to Ed’s easy confidence. This moment works better as a climactic ending reversal than as an offhand detail a third of the way through the story. If he’s just another noble heroic alchemist, he’s redundant with all the others we already have.

Meanwhile, Riza is hysterical and ineffective because she's a woman in a shonen anime.

You know, more seriously, I would like to point out that giving a female character awesome gun skills doesn't actually mean anything in a story about how non-guns are really awesome. We see a lot of great gunplay from Riza, but it's always alchemy that actually saves the day and gets all the focus. It's moving the goalposts. Sure, we'll give the woman a cool skill… that we will then choose to make useless in the context of the story. It's such tedious faux-feminism, going through the motions so you can say, technically, that you have a "strong female character" without actually doing anything to respect them or integrate them into the narrative. For every "strong female character" in Brotherhood, there's a male character who's stronger. Women are still, fundamentally, supporting characters – they're awesome because part of the male fantasy is an awesome support staff, but the boys get to be more awesome and the boys get to be who the story's actually about.

I really want us to start being more critical of representation like this. Treating strong female characters like a list of checkboxes is so totally wrongheaded. Characters don't exist in a vacuum. A skill that's impressive in one narrative or one power level may be completely meaningless in another. We need to look at characters within the context of the narrative they inhabit, relative to other characters and the framing of the work.

To prove my point, our resident Gary Stu has just appeared to show Riza up and beat the boss fight literally without moving a single step.

BUT TELL ME AGAIN HOW THIS SERIES IS GOD’S GIFT TO FEMINISM.

Mustang is using Havoc's lighter for a starter, despite explicitly establishing that it was busted earlier.

Mustang fireballs her again.

He also drew a perfect transmutation circle in his own blood and perfectly cauterized his internal bleeding despite explicitly saying he doesn't know medical alchemy. Now that his jacket's opened, we also get to see he's been hiding a Superman physique this whole time. You could put this in a parody of male power fantasies and I'd say it was too unbelievable.

Mustang fireballs her again. We get a gruesome close-up shot of her skin burning off.

Mustang fireballs her again.

Mustang decides he can kill this regenerator monster powered by the thing that supposedly has infinite energy by just killing her enough times, because he's read the script.

Mustang fireballs her again.

We get a closeup of her Philosopher's Stone, and coincidentally also a closeup of her tits.

Mustang fireballs her again.

And again.

I'd like to point out that every single one of these fireballs is ENORMOUS. Alphonse has to create a stone wall to hide behind so Riza isn't charbroiled too. We can see the entire room lighting up. I'd also like to point out this is in a SEALED UNDERGROUND ROOM, and FIRE REQUIRES OXYGEN. OXYGEN IS NOT INFINITE. If he lights the whole room on fire, he is DONE. HE USED UP ALL THE OXYGEN IN THE ROOM. HE CANNOT KEEP SPAMMING FIREBALLS. And I don't care what fanwank you can pull out to justify this, because the bottom line is that someone winning a fight by endlessly spamming the same move is terrible writing. This is not a climactic boss fight, this is just the Gary Stu showing off how awesome he is.

And through all of this Lust has done absolutely nothing except writhe and scream in agony, because Mustang is a Gary Stu therefore fire stunlocks everything. Only at the very end does she actually try to attack him, remembering she can spear people through the brain just in time for him to kill her while her spear is INCHES away from his face, because he's very awesome.

Also, HOW IS HE NOT BURNING HIMSELF HERE. HOW. HIS ARM IS IN THE EXPLOSION. HOW.

Meanwhile, Lust can still talk but somehow not extend her spear one more inch. Her Philosopher's Stone disintegrates, so the woman has nobly died to teach us that you can kill homunculi by just hitting them until they run out of HP, because that's so interesting.

And then Mustang collapses from his wound now that it no longer matters, invoking the very important power of the Not-Sue: see, he did all that while he really was one step away from death, that totally makes him less sueish and not more!

Mustang ignores Riza to praise Al for protecting her.

Bradley, our other resident Gary Stu, is revealed to have been watching the whole thing. He for some reason does not kill Mustang, thus establishing who has the greater Sue power.

Winry is sulking and hoping the man comes back safe because that's her purpose in life.

Then we end with more Barry, because we really needed that. His body is somehow still not dead, and erases the seal on the one part of the armor that stayed intact, killing them both. What was the point of this?

Then the show remembers Ed is supposed to be the protagonist. We cut to him for five seconds to discover Hoenheim has conveniently returned to Resembool at the same time as him.

Conclusion

A lot of people tell me that OG was misogynist garbage and Brotherhood is super progressive.

I don't know what anime they watched, but I just saw the sole female antagonist – and let's take a moment to reflect on the fact the sole female antagonist is Lust – die a gruesome, disgusting, sexualized death less than a third of the way through the story because she was too busy flashing her tits to actually fight, for no other reason than to show how awesome a dude is.

This is my breaking point. There is no coming back from this. I don't care how awesome Olivier is. Anyone who recommends this show as full of ~great female characters~ without thinking this content deserved even the teensiest of caveats is not anyone whose judgment I trust.

And sure, let's be real here, I watch anime, I'm willing to put up with some misogynist crap if there's something else worth my time. But this has established, very definitively, that there absolutely will not be anything worth my time. Lust, as we will see when we continue with OG, was an incredibly important and complex character in the original anime, absolutely crucial to the narrative of the homunculi and many of the things I loved about the story. And this is what Brotherhood does with her.

And that's not even the only awful thing about this episode! Ed wasn't in it at all! Mustang's takeover of the narrative is complete. He's the one who got to solve the mystery, fight the villain, and save the day, pretty much singlehandedly. And I'm sorry, but even if he wasn't an insufferable Gary Stu, Mustang just doesn't interest me as a character as much as Ed. I like him as a deuteragonist to Ed's protagonist, not the other way around. So no. This episode really hammers in that there is absolutely nothing here for me.

But lucky you, I read a plot summary of all the episodes after this, and I know the very next one is something I want to complain about too! So we'll keep going for one more episode. One last nail in the coffin.

#fullmetal alchemist #fma #fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #fma 2003 #liveblog