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#all this to say i wish i added more description to my writing but it's hard LOL !!!!
willowser · 1 month
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hi willow 👉🏾👈🏾, i have a writing question if you don’t mind me asking. how do you personally write with such detail??? i find it so challenging to make my writing consice and to the point but also interesting without dragging unnecessary descriptions out, and you can only use so many adverbs without them becoming annoying. i know writing is inherently telling, but how can you still show the readers without being too boring or over-descriptive?
hi kennie, friend !! i don't mind you asking at all, though i don't know if i'm the best person to ask alkfhagha also i didn't know how to get all my thoughts together enough to type out (read: eepy....) so have these two voice notes instead LOL
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textmel8r · 11 days
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[ SMAU + DRABBLE ] 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐀𝐑 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 ! ( eighth installment ) in which you find toji fushiguro’s number off a sugar baby site .
୨୧˚ part; one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight.
୨୧˚ incl; toji fushiguro
୨୧˚ cw; sugarmommy! reader , sugarbaby! toji , smut , submissive toji , finger sucking , masturbation , oral sex (f!receiving) , profanity
୨୧˚ an; so not happy with my writing in this one, probs will rewrite it one day but here, have a couple thousand words of smut🗣️ this is lowkey another filler but lowkey not at the same time? i wanted to fit in another intimate moment before shit goes south awooooooo
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You were not fibbing when you said you knew your way around the kitchen. “Holy fuck,” Toji all but moans, tearing into another piece of tender meat with his canines. It was juicy and seasoned almost too much, just the way he likes it. He squints across the table, where you eat in tandem with much better manners than he could ever hope to have. “Who taught you how to cook like this?”
You shrug bashfully under his gawking, wiping your mouth with a dainty stroke of the napkin you had placed in your lap. “I traveled a lot in between semesters at college. Italy, France, Denmark…” You list a few more places that Toji wouldn’t be able to point out on a map. “Those European countries do food so good, I guess it inspired me to give my best shot at it as well.” Self taught, huh? Yeah, you seem like the type to succeed in everything you try. 
The man nods, ultimately wishing he had more to add. He wishes he had just an ounce in common with you, a smidgen of relatability to offer. But he doesn’t. Toji didn’t finish school. He’s never left Japan. He’s never cooked a damn thing from scratch in his life. You must’ve caught on to his struggle and decided to show mercy by adding, “actually, right now we’re eating steak au poivre.”
“Steak au po–” He cut himself off before inevitably butchering the name. “What is that? French?”
You’re nodding enthusiastically. “That’s right. I happened upon this dish when I was staying in Bordeaux with a few college mates.” There’s a sweet smile tugging sheepishly at your lips as you recall the memory. “I fell in love with it the second I tried it, and asked the manager right then and there for the recipe.”
Toji shakes his head with disbelief, talking with his mouth full of food. “You’re just full of stories, aren’t you?”
“Some would call me experienced, yes.”
His brow raises. Experienced? Was that a come on? Toji gives way to his own quaint smile, jutting his chin toward you. “Say it again.”
“Say what again?”
“Steak au whatever.”
You oblige his request, repeating the name back slowly so he could attempt to grasp it. “Steak au poivre. Now you give it a go.”
Toji finishes chewing the mouthful of peppercorn-laced meat, swallowing it down with a swig of the Château Cheval Blanc you’d poured at the start of the meal. Some fancy French imported wine is what he gathered from the long winded description you waxed as you topped off an extravagant glass for him. Wine never really appealed to the man—he usually went for the harder shit. The type that you knock back from lowball glasses. The type to get you piss drunk after three rounds—but it was all you ever drank. It was safe to say he was becoming accustomed to your tastes. Maybe the sweetness wasn’t so terrible. He clears his throat, putting embarrassingly too much effort into his “steak au poivre.” It doesn’t sound pretty the way it did leaving your mouth, and he grimaces. “Can’t fucking do it.”
“I thought you sounded good.” He scoffs at that, but you click your tongue. “I’m serious.”
“Yeah, well, we’ll just leave the French speaking to you.” The plate before him sits scraped clean. You’re still working on your dinner. Fuck, you’re a slow eater. “You know any more?”
“Any more French, you mean?”
He nods along with a gruff hum, swishing his tongue around his teeth, collecting anything left over of that smokiness from the peppered steak. 
“Hm. Tu m'as manqué, Toji.” You hide your grin behind the rim of your glass. 
Thick forearms crossed over chest, he croons a deep, barely-there chuckle. “I heard my name. Tell me what you said.”
“No way,” you chortle.
“Ah, c’mon. You’re all blushy.” He licks over the chappedness of his lower lip, knowing gaze latched onto your lips. It was hypnotic, your smile. “You say somethin’ dirty about me, ma’am?”
The way in which your eyes widened coquettishly at the accusation had Toji’s heart beating just a bit more erratically. Like a fawn, he thinks. All that was missing on you was a white, cottony tail. 
“If I said something dirty, It would have been in a language you could understand.” Finally, you take the last bite off your dish as well. Hopefully that means dinner is officially over; Toji has been craving dessert since he stepped foot in your house and got showered in ‘welcome back’ gifts. “I’m not the type of woman easily embarrassed by my sexuality. I thought you would have picked that up by now.”
He persists. “What are you embarrassed by?”
“Toji.” His name is spoken sharply, a verbal warning that he was tiptoeing the line. Threatening to shatter that layer of thin ice he stood upon. This is what he’s been needing. This is what he’s been fucking needing.
“I’ve been thinking about you, ma’am.” Any semblance of a filter is long gone, melted by the sheer heat of his desire. His limbs feel heavy, hands tumbling into his lap. They rest on the wide surface area of sweatpant-clad thighs, just sitting there. Feeling himself. “This entire week, I’ve been thinking.”
You seem to get the implications of his confession. “In a sexual way?”
“Yeah.” That’s a white lie. To be truthful was to admit that the sexual thoughts Toji let himself think about you were the minority. Objectifying you in the depths of his mind wasn't enough. He thought about your breasts, sure. He thought about your curves, and your ass, and your mouth, and every other body part that would grant him pleasure. But that wasn’t enough for Toji. Fixations of his tended to lead him astray from fantasies, instead breaching carefully saved memories stored within his brain catalog. When he touched himself, it was more or less to remembrances of mundane tasks you’d dealt him in the past. All the times you had bestowed little gifts and knick knacks on a whim just because they reminded you of him. Or when you drag him to the outlets with you for a shopping spree and he’ll act miserable the entire time, but you both knew it was a horribly crafted facade. Or even, like now, when you’d treat him to dinner because you worry over him and his eating schedule. The little things really counted; a revelation that scared Toji shitless, so he opted to ignore those budding, foreign feelings and replace it with familiarity: lust.
“Toji, honey, are you alright?”
What? His breathing pattern was off kilter, and the muscles of his jaw flexed unconsciously. When had he started palming himself? His right hand had grown a mind of its own apparently, because when Toji stole a glance downward, there it was; kneading roughly at the bulge between his meaty thighs. How desperate was he? To go dormant like that, so consumed with the thought of you that he began to instinctually masturbate himself not even five feet away from where you sit. And why… Why wasn’t he stopping?
“Can we fuck now?”
“Oh.” You barely look shocked. Not the slightest bit appalled like he expected you to be. Instead, slide off a ring that took purchase wrapped around your middle finger. A sigh escapes you as you place the band on the table. “I still have more to ask you. I wanted to know how your work trip went.”
Toji shakes his head, something akin to a toddler trying to get fed vegetables. “No.”
“No?”
“I don’t wanna talk about work.”
“Why not?” You frown, leaning forward against the tabletop. “Was it bad?”
He knows what you’re doing. Trying to make him spill any details about his job. Well, he won’t give in. 
A heavy sigh slithers out hoarsely from the deepest part of his lungs, and Toji presses his palms to the table, pushing himself up. He stands tall, much like the tent at his crotch, and slinks along the roundness of the dinner table, walking his fingertips across the top all the while. “I don’t want to talk,” he reiterates, breathy and abrasive.
Finally, Toji stands before you. Still, you are seated, unbothered by the towering man’s presence. No, you’re swirling your wine glass sophisticatedly, lips pursed into a narrow line. Like you’re the slightest bit irritated with his persistent defiance. 
God, you won't even look at him.
Or maybe, you were never irritated at all. Toji cops a second glance to your lips, finding the faintest ghost of a frown. “You’ve been acting so… so removed. Ever since you left.” Now you’re looking at him; Toji shudders under the intense fire that billows behind your eyes, wide and wetted with worry. “I want you to feel like you can tell me things. I want your trust, Toji.”
You have his trust. Every last crumb of it resides in the palm of your soft hand.
“... And I know that it’s stupid—I’m stupid for wanting that from you. I know what this relationship is, and I know that there are these unspoken boundaries, but I—I can’t—”
It was the first time he’d ever heard you speak with such a volatile expression. There was a tremble of uncertainty in your vocal chords, carrying into the skittish dialogue that tumbled out in rambles. Something about such a show of pity from you, his Y/n, made his guts churn like butter. He can’t listen to this any more. With swiftness, Toji dives down to press his mouth against yours, swallowing the words that die on your tongue. One hand grips the back of your chair, the other holds the roundness of your cheek. He feels your gasp, feels the way your shoulders jolt in surprise, but he doesn’t release you.
This was really only his second instance of kissing you. The first had been in his bed, with his groin pressed to yours, tongue fighting its way to the back of your throat with greedy fervor. This second kiss was anything but greedy, though. Despite the ache that roiled at the base of his stomach, Toji didn’t serve you a kiss that reflected his desire. Tongues never met and spit was never swapped; just lips on glossed lips. 
At last, Toji reluctantly peels away. Lipstick residue feels heavy on his mouth, and he knows he probably looks foolish donning remnants of your dark lip lacquer, but he doesn’t move to wipe his skin. The circular bottom of the wine glass clinks as you clumsily set it down, freeing your hands. They branch upwards, finding his face. A pair of thumbs rub the sensitive pads of flesh beneath his eyes, massaging out those ugly, darkened bags that have accumulated as a result of many sleepless nights. It feels orgasmic, the way you handle him. 
“I trust you.” The words are out in the air before he has time to think.
You brighten, sunshine hiding in the crevices of your smile. “You mean that?” You ask him, hands petting down the sides of his neck.
He meant it wholeheartedly. The amount of trust left within Toji was scarce. Too many bad people fucked him for life; showed him the meaning of the phrase ‘trust is earned.’ So it really fucking freaked him out how quickly you came to earn it. A little over a year-–that’s how long he’s known you—you’ve have plenty of time to fuck him over. To batter him. And yet, you haven’t. All you’ve ever shown him was kindness and consideration and warmth and everything else Toji never knew how bad he was thirsty for.
“Wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t mean it.”
“I trust you, too, Toji.” 
He wonders if he deserves that. Because really, what has given you besides his annoyingly closed-off dickhead attitude? He provides fuck all, but you still stick around. 
Toji doesn’t say anything. He swoops once more, capturing your lips in a hungrier kiss than before. All the playful innocence is tossed aside, forgotten in lieu of Toji’s devastatingly furious need to consume you. Tongues finally greet each other in a spittle-slicked tango; he dominates yours with ease, worming behind your teeth just to collect your sweet flavor. Wine, he thinks. You taste like your goddamn expensive ass wine.
He feels feverish. One-track minded, hyper fixated on you. On your crossed legs underneath the table. “Fuck,” Toji breathes into your mouth, sucking on your bottom lip.
Your hand clashes against the hard wall of his chest, patting it softly. A wordless signal that you need some air, so he retracts. “Let’s go to the bedroom.” 
The plea goes in one ear and falls right out the other. Toji leeches against your neck, dragging the flat of his wet tongue over that little throbbing pulse point. His teeth grate against your flawless skin, completely none the wiser that you’re even talking to him. You thwack the back of his head, and he lurches into the crook of your shoulder, muffling a groan.
“No marks, I’ve got work.”
His eyes roll, face still burrowed against you. He couldn’t give less of a shit about your job right now. 
“Come on, let’s go to my room.” “Gimme a sec.” He’s still licking below your jaw, making his way down. This stupidly lavish house had been cursed with three levels, your bedroom holed up at the very top floor. Like hell Toji was going to part ways with your glorious body so you two could safely make it up the two ridiculous staircases. Fuck that.
“Toji, I’m… serious…” Your raucous pants of anticipation suggest otherwise. Toji has sunken to his knees, crawling beneath the table and finding a home on the floor before your seat. His kneecaps scream in discomfort as they pin heavily to the wooden floorboards, but Toji bears the pain well ( he’d always been somewhat of a masochist ). Your legs are still crossed, one knee hinging over the other. 
“Open these.” Two calloused hands cuff around the thinnest parts of either ankle. Your legs were conspicuously smooth; did you shave for him? There is an attempt at delicacy when Toji pries your legs apart, and it makes you giggle. 
“Here?” You laugh more. Toji suspects you’re patronizing him in a way. “I haven’t even cleared the table. Are you really so impatient?”
And here Toji thought he exercised his patience well. He didn’t jump your bones the second of his arrival. No, he waited like a good boy until after dinner. “I’ve waited for this the whole week.” Restless hands walk up those porcelain calves, strong and lean from working in high heels. They wander up, hooking beneath the junctures of your knees; Toji uses his celestial strength to his advantage, maneuvering both legs with ease until he’s got them resting comfortably over his broad shoulders. Toji turns, cocks his head to give a serpentine lick to the inside of your thigh. Then a bite. “Don’t make me wait any longer. I’ll fucking die.”
You peer down at him. “Don’t talk like that.” You feel yourself. Small hands groping your chest, sliding lower and lower. “You’re not going to die.”
His mouth feels sticky, like there’s a spoonful of honey under his tongue. “I might.”
Your heel drives into his upper back, an impish little warning that makes him throb all over. “Don’t talk like that, I said.” Those manicured hands have garnered Toji’s full attention. They descend all the way to the hem of your luxurious dress, wrenching into its hem. It’s the sexiest sight Toji had ever seen: you pulling your dress up with the quickness of a sloth, inching the fabric up until it scrunches around the dip of your waistline. 
“These are hot,” he murmurs, thumbing the waistband of the scarlet panties. They were tight, sinking into the ample pudge of your hips and soft tummy. So fucking beautiful, he thinks, the contrast between deep red lace and the flesh of which it lays upon. The perfect, little present gift wrapped in a low-rise lace thong. “Bet they cost a pretty penny.”
You spare a breathy exhale through your nostrils. “I don’t look at price tags when I buy things for you.”
You bought these just for him? “You spoil me.”
“You deserve to get spoiled, baby.”
He is so mind numbingly turned on. Sickening tendrils of appetence bleed into his vision, his lust coils around his limbs and guide his movements like a marionette. Toji thumbs your—his—panties to the side, soaking in the sight of that pretty pussy he’s longed to be back inside of since the moment he pulled out. His face is close, so fucking close that he can feel warmth radiate off your core and deepen his flush.
Perhaps this is how he begins his journey of repayment. Ever indebted to you, despite your odd relationship being a mutually agreed upon situation, Toji fears you’ve truly altered him. For the better or worse he isn’t sure yet; all he knows is that you make him feel good. Better than he’s felt in fucking ages. You said he deserves to get spoiled? Well so do you, too.
Toji eats you with erotic vigor, delving into the deepest parts of your cunt with his lascivious tongue. He’ll be the first to admit that he doesn’t possess many skills. He isn’t terribly smart, nor is he gifted with great conversational skills like you. He isn't good at holding a real job. Isn’t very good at expressing himself. Not good at abiding by the law, or staying sober, either. But if ever there was an artistry in which Toji had full confidence he had mastered, it was oral sex.
“Oh, Toji,” you gasped, forcing his face deeper with a hand on the back of his skull. “Right there.”
Toji dug you out, excavating your hole with expertise. One hand slipped up beneath your dress, under your bra, pawing at your breast whilst the other busied itself in his pants. He stroked himself to the heady taste of pussy, fanning your clit with hot puffs of breath. You writhe against his open mouth, hips dancing, hands grabbing.
It’s more enjoyable like this, Toji thinks briefly. To not expect a wad of bills afterward in exchange for his velvet tongue. He eats you for leisure, because he wants to, and because you want him, and no other reason. It’s enough that you both need each other.
Toji groans loosely when you yank his hair, getting off on the way you move his head to your liking. “Suck my clit,” you instruct quietly, and he obliges with upmost obedience, nose nuzzling against the tuft of hair at your pubic bone.
Toji opens his eyes for the first time in a while, then thanks God he did. You look something like a goddess, celestial and righteous in the way your body works against his face. Using him to cure an insatiable desperation, with your lids screwed shut and head tossed back on your shoulders. “Are you gonna cum?” He sits up on his haunches a little taller, a little more alert now to fully experience your orgasm. “Cum in my mouth.”
He begs for it. Begs like a little bitch. Over and over again, mumbling the mantra between rough suctions to your swollen clit. Begging wasn’t like him. His father beat the beggar out of him many years ago, said it was weak to yearn for things so badly. The old man was right, Toji has never felt weaker than he does right now, knelt under the table with his head between your thighs.
“Oh my God.” Your voice is strained thin, each syllable pulled taught. The vice grip on his roots start to sting, follicles ripping from the scalp, but doesn’t tell you to stop. “Toji, fuck you’re so good.”
He’s good.
“You’re so good.”
“Mmn.” He squeezes himself, chokes his dick hard. Toji feels it when you cum. Warmth floods the cavern of his slack mouth, gushing and creamy. You fall silent, stunned by the force of your orgasm he presumes. Toji licks you through your high, guzzling down every drop of wetness that seeps from your spasming slit. It’s hot and gushy and messy; cum dribbles past his lips, collecting in beads that roll down his tensing neck.
Only when you blindly push at his face does Toji part ways with your center, leaning past your trembling hand to nuzzle into your stomach. It’s concave with an ongoing exhale; he nips at your navel. “Breathe.”
“Toji,” you whisper. On the come down, you’re a lot nicer; those needy, grabbing hands of yours now stroked down the tangled mess of his damp shag. He presses a handful of sloppy smooches above your belly button.
The erection trapped in the confines of his pants twitch at the dreadfully angelic drawl of his name. “Good?” His question is gruff and pointless as ever; anyone with eyes could tell you just had the most Earth-shattering orgasm of your life.
Your head lolls forward, rolling down to face him. Fingertips brush his chin, collecting the sticky residuals that dampened his stubble. You take your lower lip in between teeth when you bring those same soaked digits to Toji’s open mouth. He doesn’t resist you. Fingers are welcomed; he unhinges his jaw, baring the same holy tongue that just drove you to Heaven. You wipe cum-ridden fingers against the muscle, and Toji clamps around them in a vacuum-esque suction, looking up at you through dark lashes all the while. Your thumb traces the raised flesh on his upper lip. That ugly, jagged scar.
He catches your wrist when you move to flee his mouth, holding you in place. Sucking on you, touching himself along the way. Lapping between fingers, tonguing the thin web of skin there.
“So good, baby boy.” There’s the praise he craved, the praise he played oblivious to get. You claw deeper, jutting towards the back of his throat, pulling a scratchy gag from the man. What kind of fetish was this? You made everything sexy, even whatever this humiliation ritual was; watching him choke down slippery fingers with fat tears bleeding at his waterline. “You are so beautiful, Toji.”
“—oh en nah,” or no I’m not had there not been a barrier blocking his teeth from touching. Toji knows he’s an aged man, one riddled with scars and wounds and bruises and gauges and what have you. His skin is nowhere near perfect, baring disgusting reminders of what he does—who he is. Beautiful is what he’d call someone like you. Someone calm and serene, humble and kind. You’re a beautiful sight, and you’re also the complete and utter opposite of him.
“You are.” He wanted to be inside you for this. Toji had been daydreaming this scenario over and out in his head over the long haul of the week, going through the motions of his plan to fuck you. He’d give you everything tenfold, a barbaric fucking unlike your first time together. He imagined finally showing you his version of things, bending you over the couch first thing and blowing his load deep into your cunt.
Toji choked again, and a single thick tear fell from his lashes. You whispered sweet prayers, holding his face, wiping his eyes, fucking his mouth with fingers that tasted of your cum. It was a damn mystery how you rendered him so fucking pitiful, to be nutting on his knees into his boxers like this. A damn mystery.
His breaths are ragged when he explodes, hand and cock obscured by the sweatpants that sat low around his hips. Toji doesn’t stop pumping, tugging the shaft with long, hard strokes, wringing himself dry. Dark eyes weld shut, and he collapses against your thigh with a quake of exhaustion. Toji doesn’t know when you withdrew your fingers; the only tell that gave it away was the string of saliva that slapped coldly against his chin in the wake of your removal. He mewls, a graveling sound that sounds as if his voice box had been dragged through a sea of razor blades.
“You alright?”
A flowery hand slithers beneath his damp cheek, and suddenly his heavy head is being lifted. Toji is forced to meet your soft gaze; adoration brims in your eyes, as though you’re proud of him for creaming in his briefs like some flimsy virgin.
“Answer me, please.”
Toji smacks his mouth, preparing for his voice to project broken and fragmented. “I’m fine.” He could do without the pity; you were cautious to a fault. He wasn’t made of glass.
“You’re filthy.”
He grumbles, feigning grumpiness and averting his eyes off to the side. “I just had your pussy in my mouth.”
You bend at the waist, leaning down to meet him for a kiss. Toji melts against you, cradling your face with his semen-stained hand. You don’t seem to mind the wetness. He’s pouting against your mouth, childlike. “I wanted to cum inside you.”
You latch onto his nose, nibbling the point. “Let’s go clean up.” There’s a telling smile etched onto your lips, and your mouth finds his ear. Whispering ever so sensually, “I have a big shower in my bedroom.”
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taexual · 5 months
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sleepwalking ● 16 | jjk
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pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
summary: due to unfortunate circumstances, you ended up managing your ex-boyfriend’s band. you thought you’ve both made peace with it, but suddenly he’s very eager to prove to you that first love never dies.
genre: rockstar!jungkook / exes to lovers
warnings: fluff (if you squint really really hard), ANGST, strong language, explicit descriptions of violence & the process of cleaning wounds, mentions of loss of consciousness, SLOW BURN
words: 12.2k
read from the beginning ○ masterlist
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chapter 16 ► i’m still your favourite regret, you’re still my weapon of choosing
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The performance in Cologne the next day passed by in a blur. Jungkook refused to speak to anyone and only opened his mouth when it was absolutely necessary during the sound check—and even then, most of his vocabulary consisted of grunts or monosyllables.
He wouldn’t have called it sulking—he would have called it existential sorrow—but from the perspective of those around him, that was what this was.
He had dreamed of a happy ending with you. Now, he feared there would be no ending at all. He feared you’d leave and your goodbye would come in a letter. Or maybe just a farewell email.
“I had a wonderful time working with you and I wish you all the best for the future,” would be the last thing you’d write. The last thing you’d say.
You’d leave and he would never see you again.
Although he didn’t talk to you, Jungkook watched you a lot. The band had to do some interviews backstage before the Cologne show, and you were in the room with them, behind the camera. He counted, you only looked at him once.
After the concert, Jungkook took a long shower, but it could not drown his fears. When he returned to the hallway outside the dressing rooms, he saw that the post-show drinks were already finished and everyone had returned to the bus. He’d hoped that would happen. He needed a few more minutes alone.
He entered the changing room with a towel draped over his shoulders and quickly changed his shorts into sweatpants. Just as he pulled his hoodie over his head—somewhat laboriously, as his arms were still damp from the shower—he heard something vibrating against the leather couch in the room.
Confused, he pulled the hoodie on and walked over to the couch. He didn’t recognise the phone, but Taehyung was calling it, so chances were good that the device belonged to Luna. He made a mental note to bring it to her and placed it back on the couch while he packed the rest of his things.
He had just unzipped his bag when he heard the door open and turned his head. His expectant heart immediately jumped over several beats at the possibility that this was you.
But it was the furthest thing from you.
It was Sid.
Sid had many useless, irritating talents, but always finding Jungkook when he was alone, was his most impressive one.
Jungkook started to roll his eyes even before Sid spoke up, but that didn’t deter the older boy from entering the room.
“You’ve been ignoring us the whole day,” Sid said, closing the door behind him. “Well, I don’t care if you ignore everyone else. But you’ve been ignoring me, and I can’t allow that.”
Jungkook threw his jeans and shorts into the bag.
“That is so kind,” he said without looking up. “Did you miss me that much?”
“I did,” Sid said, and even without looking at him, Jungkook knew he had his usual psychotic grin on. Leaning against the dressing table, Sid added, “the clock’s tick-tick-ticking.”
“If you don’t leave me alone right now,” Jungkook retorted, unplugging his charger and packing it, too, “my foot is going to be kick-kick-kicking your ass.”
Sid merely snorted at the threat. “You’re very hostile, you know? It’s just a bet.”
Jungkook scoffed.
He remembered hoping that Sid would eventually forget about the bet if no one mentioned it. How very naive he had been. Sid would never forget. He was like a hateful elephant in this case—he had a flawless memory for anything that benefited him and was constantly at the centre of attention in any room he was in, making it impossible to escape his presence.
Jungkook couldn’t believe that he had once clung to the Katana so tightly that he didn’t even consider the possibility of losing the bet as soon as he made it. It seemed absurd now. What did he want to prove? Nothing made sense to him anymore.
“Is it? Really? Just a bet?” he rebutted, moving closer to Sid with each question. “Because when I told you I wanted to end it, you acted like we signed a fucking contract.”
Sid shrugged, his indifference as irritating as it was insincere.
“A bet’s still a bet,” he replied. “You’ve got to keep your word.”
Rolling his eyes, Jungkook turned around and grabbed his hairdryer from the table. They had already argued about this before. He didn’t have the energy to keep doing it, and he still had things to pack.
“Get fucked, Sid.”
“Come on,” Sid said, clearly expecting a more grandiose response from him. “You keep saying that. But I’m willing to talk to you here. Tell me what happened.”
Jungkook glared at him through his peripherals. “What the fuck do you mean, what happened?”
“Well, you were acting so bold and confident before,” Sid said in a breathy voice, presumably to imitate Jungkook’s manner of speaking. “You were sure you’d get back together, no problem.”
“No,” Jungkook countered, straightening up. “I was sure we could go on a date, no problem. That was the extent of the bet for me.”
It was bad enough, he knew. But he couldn’t move forward if he didn’t own up to it.
“Aww.” Sid tilted his head sideways and pursed his lips to feign sympathy. “But you couldn’t even do that...”
“I fucking—okay,” Jungkook stopped when he felt his agitation grow. There was a voice in his head—very similar to yours—reminding him that Sid wasn’t worth it. “Get out. I’m serious.”
“Was that all talk?” Sid continued as if the younger boy hadn’t spoken. “Admit it, and maybe we’ll come to a different agreement about the bet.”
“Get,” Jungkook said, gritting his teeth, “out.”
Sid clicked his tongue, but the pleasure that this interaction brought him was prominent in his eyes. Antagonising Jungkook was his favourite part of the day.
“Predictable,” he said. “It seems I overestimated you, after all.”
“What the fuck are you on about now?”
“Well, you know,” Sid continued to spin his webs around Jungkook. “You and your manager. I thought you’d win the bet for sure.”
Raising an eyebrow, Jungkook asked, “yet you still agreed to it?”
Sid’s eye twitched slightly—Jungkook felt a great sense of satisfaction at the sight; it wasn’t often that Sid was forced to question his own logic, however momentarily—but he recovered too quickly.
“I like to gamble.” He shrugged. “What can I say?”
“You can shut up,” Jungkook suggested.
“However, you didn’t manage to do it,” Sid went on. “And I have to say, I am genuinely surprised. Not about you, no. I always knew you were pathetically in love with her, that’s just who you are. No offence, just the truth, really. But she’s just—I mean, come on.” He paused to laugh, one hand on his stomach as if he found himself so amusing that he needed to keep his guts from spilling out. “You fluttered your eyelashes at her once, and she went to Paris with you. She’s that fucking easy.”
Jungkook felt the room still as he lifted his gaze from Sid’s stomach to his eyes.
“What?” he asked.
“Oh, you know what I mean.” Sid’s grin was about as wide as the distance from this venue to the nearest hospital, where Jungkook thought he was about to send him.
Sid pushed himself off the table he’d been leaning against and walked over to the rack of clothes next to the couch. Jungkook watched him, stiff and belligerent.
“I thought she was keeping you on a short leash. And don’t blame me. I mean, you always ran after her as soon as she called,” the older boy continued, laughing with a little shake of his head—as if in disbelief. He turned and leisurely strolled back towards Jungkook. “But she—I mean, I get the feeling she doesn’t like me very much, but even I could have taken her out if I wanted to. Honestly, man, I’m surprised you couldn’t do it. She’s that specific type—you know the one—where she’ll say yes to anyone if they just put in enough effort—”
Jungkook’s punch landed right on the side of Sid’s mouth, cutting him off.
Something in Sid’s neck cracked as the blunt force twisted his head to the side. The corner of his mouth was bleeding, but he still had an almost defiant look in his eyes when he turned back to Jungkook. The tips of his fingers were painted scarlet when he pulled them back from his lips.
“I fucking warned you,” Jungkook growled while Sid continued to stare at his hand. “Get your ass out of here right fucking now or I swear they’ll have to carry you out of here in a fucking box.”
Sid spat the blood from his mouth on the floor and glared at Jungkook.
“That the best you can do?” he challenged. “Huh? Maybe that’s why you couldn’t even get someone like her to—”
Jungkook raised his fist again, but Sid had already been anticipating it. He pushed Jungkook’s hand back with his forearm, knocking the younger boy off balance for a moment—it was then that he landed a punch on Jungkook’s left cheekbone.
A sharp pain surged through the side of his face, but Jungkook was wide awake and furious.
In less than a second, he noticed Sid swinging back again—Sid had always been strong but slow—and Jungkook blocked his blow with his left wrist and rammed his shoulder into Sid’s chest, pushing him into the wall and wrapping an arm around him. The older boy thrashed and squirmed with raging strength until he freed one of his hands.
Jungkook tried to pin Sid’s left arm against the wall—he was left-handed if barely even that—but, being the massive pile of unbelievably lucky crap that he was, Sid managed to use his right fist to reach the boy restraining him.
Sid’s unexpected southpaw caught Jungkook just as he was lowering his head to avoid the blow from the older boy’s dominant hand—and his right fist connected with the side of Jungkook’s head, between his eye and temple.
“You’re f-fucking embarrassing,” Sid snarled, bloodied and breathless, as Jungkook staggered backwards, dazed from the blow. “Weak fucking piece of sh-shit. Birds of fucking feather, you two—both fucking worthless and—”
Sid inhaled quickly before finishing his sentence—but then he ended up not even finishing his breath.
Aggravated and filled with raw adrenaline, Jungkook delivered a furious uppercut, his fist colliding solidly with Sid’s chin. The older boy was propelled backwards by the force—Jungkook heard the thud as his head hit the wall.
Already groaning, Sid was determined to fight back—never mind that the room was spinning—but Jungkook took advantage of the moment while Sid’s vision was still cloudy and pinned him against the wall with his full weight.
“I thought I told you to shut the fuck up,” he hissed, pressing his forearm against Sid’s neck.
Choking, Sid immediately grabbed Jungkook’s arm to push him off, but Jungkook had a clear strength and fury advantage. He did not budge as the older boy resisted him.
Sid knew this wasn’t a good look for him—he could feel that if Jungkook pushed his forearm into his neck any harder, he’d lift him off the ground. Unable to breathe, the older boy paled, but his eyes were black with rage.
“Face the fff-fuh-fucking facts. You’re weak,” Sid wheezed, livid. There was blood in his mouth and something else that rolled around his tongue when he spoke. “And she’s a f-fucking—”
“One more fucking word,” Jungkook warned, pressing his arm harder into Sid’s throat—the other boy couldn’t even look at him anymore, his head was pushed too far back, “and you’ll have to be fucking dissected to find out what the fuck happened to you.”
Sid gasped for breath but refused to stop speaking. “I—unf—f-fucking—”
“What the fuck—” a shrill, startled voice demanded from behind the two boys, “—is going on?!”
Jungkook jumped—Sid felt his arm shove deeper into his throat and let out a half-stifled cry—and turned to see Luna standing wide-eyed in the doorway of the changing room.
He tore himself away from Sid, who dropped his hands to his knees, panting and clutching his throat before straightening again as though nothing was wrong. But his attempt to inhale properly resulted in another violent coughing fit. He bent over to spit out some blood and something else.
The two boys watched as a tooth rolled into the revolting mixture of spit and blood on the floor. Sid looked appalled as he reached for his mouth again, almost prepared to count all his teeth to check if he’d really lost one or if spare teeth were just something he carried around in his mouth without realising.
“Do I have to ask again?!” Luna cried, too shocked to make sense of what she had the unfortunate luck of interrupting.
“It’s okay, Luna,” Jungkook said, wiping his hands on his sweatpants. “Sid was just leaving.”
Sid glared at him, coughed again, and leaned in closer.
“All bark,” he hissed hoarsely. Jungkook could see the small gap next to Sid’s lower canine when he opened his mouth. “No bite.”
“Get fucked,” Jungkook said. “And pack your shit. Don’t come anywhere near me again or you’ll be eating through a fucking straw.”
He watched as Sid narrowed his eyes, fighting a battle within himself. Jungkook’s jaw was clenched, his fists ready to strike if he made another comment or exhibited any signs of even thinking about you.
Finally, Sid turned around and stormed out of the room. As soon as he walked down the corridor without so much as a glance at Luna, she went inside.
Still completely bewildered, she stopped abruptly in the middle of the room. The pool of blood was between her and Jungkook, and they both looked at it for a moment.
“What—” she began, then paused to suppress her disgust as she lifted her gaze from the floor to Jungkook. “What the hell happened here?”
He walked over to one of the cupboards by the window, searching for towels. He needed to clean this up or the venue would report the damages to you.
“Nothing,” he replied.
“You’re bleeding,” Luna said, stepping closer. Jungkook froze as she took one of the towels from him and reached up to his temple. “You’re bleeding so much, in fact, that you might need stitches.”
He shook his head—and then received a punch in the ribs from her. He yelped in surprise and learnt to stand still while she wiped the blood off.
“It’s fine,” he insisted. His temple throbbed with pain, but it still couldn’t compare to the sharp-edged emptiness that he’d felt all day.
“It’s not fine,” Luna said, pulling away. The towel was soaked with blood. Jungkook had to admit that he was surprised he was bleeding so much. Despite the sharpness of Sid’s fists, he had assumed that he’d been merely scratched. “Let me find—”
“No!” His eyes were wide in sudden panic. “Don’t—don’t bring her here. Actually, don’t tell her about the mess here at all. Please?”
Luna watched him for a moment, her eyebrows drawn together in confusion (was he serious?) and eyes bright with pity (what a shame to be so stupid).
“Jungkook,” she said patiently. “You’re going to have bruises all over your face. Probably even a black eye.”
He exhaled and looked down.
He knew he couldn’t keep this from you, but involving you now was the worst possible thing he could do. He was supposed to make things right.
“I know,” he said slowly, “but—I’m… I don’t want this to be another one of my messes that she has to clean up. That would definitely make her give up and go to Reconnaissance.”
Luna lowered her gaze, taking a moment to process the fact that Jungkook knew about the other band, but instead of the hysterics that everyone would have expected from him, he’d been rather composed all day today. Until he got into a fight with Sid, of course.
She tossed the towel onto the puddle of blood on the floor. She had no intention of cleaning it up herself, but she couldn’t stand to look at it.
“Well, have you considered not getting into this mess in the first place?” she asked then.
“Believe it or not, he started it,” Jungkook mumbled as he gathered more towels from the cupboard.
“Does that even matter now?”
Luna had to step back as he bent down to mop the floor. Some blood had already seeped into the wooden floorboards, but Jungkook scrubbed over the stain with the towel anyway.
“No,” he said, concentrating his irritation on the repetitive motions as he wiped the floor. “I guess not.”
“At least let me get some band-aids for you.” She looked around the room. There didn’t seem to be any first-aid kits here, but she had a few band-aids in her bag that she’d left in the waiting area outside. “Although I don’t know if that’s even enough.”
“It is enough,” Jungkook said. “I’m fine. He barely—barely touched me.”
Rolling her eyes and shaking her head, Luna turned to the door, muttering under her breath, “fucking boys.”
Jungkook couldn’t help a small smile.
“I heard that!” he shouted.
“I wanted you to!” she shouted back without turning around.
He chuckled, then winced at the sharp twinge in his temple. The adrenaline must have worn off, or the pain was getting stronger. He stopped scrubbing the floors, hoping to leave a message for the organisers and personally apologise for the mess later.
Then he crossed his legs on the ground and leaned his head against the wall. For just one second, he closed his eyes and rested.
He made a decision while he did.
He resolved to make sure that Sid wouldn’t come anywhere near him, Rated Riot, or you.
He finally realised that he had friends here—real friends. They had been here all along, the people who loved him. Hoseok, who took care of him when he was hungover. Yoongi, who tried to find help when he thought Jungkook was feeling a little too much. Taehyung, who didn’t leave even after Jungkook admitted how much he’d fucked up. And Luna, who looked about ready to physically beat some sense into him, but still stayed to help him with his wounds. Namjoon, Jimin, Seokjin, and Maggie, too—honestly, the entire team who laughed at his jokes, teased him and always supported him.
Although he was still worried about being alone with his thoughts, Jungkook knew he didn’t need Sid to fill the void. Now he wondered if Sid had always been the void he was trying to escape.
He was determined to prevent history from repeating itself. These people that he’d desperately wanted to call friends had already contributed significantly to your break-up once before, without him realising it.
Well, now he realised it. And he was going to fix it—all of it.
He could start by eliminating the reason why he kept making the same mistakes.
A minute later, Luna returned to the room. The sight of Jungkook sitting on the floor with his eyes closed made her look twice as she felt her heart drop in sudden anxiety.
She thought about turning around and looking for you, because you had a lot more patience to deal with this than she thought she did. But then, she knew that another argument was the last thing you or Jungkook needed right now.
She took a deep breath and approached him.
“Here,” she said as she grabbed another towel and squatted down next to him with the few band-aids that, frankly, seemed meagre when she saw the cuts and bruises on his face up close. “Let me help you.”
Jungkook had only briefly opened his eyes to look at her and then closed them again.
“Thank you,” he said as she wiped more blood from the side of his face before applying the band-aid. She didn’t mean to be gentle. She wanted him to understand how much he’d messed up. But her movements ended up being tentative and careful anyway.
“Don’t thank me,” she said, biting her lip as the blood immediately seeped through the band-aids. They would not hold; they both knew that. She sighed and pulled away from him. “She will see this. You will have to argue with her again. I can’t help you with that.”
He nodded his head once. “I know.”
Luna rose and walked over to the back of the room, considering this. She leaned her hip against the table and looked back at him.
“I don’t, um—okay. For what it’s worth,” she said, resting her hands on the table on either side of her. “I don’t think she’ll quit. Not even over this.”
“You really believe that?” Jungkook asked, opening his eyes. The hope in them was so bright that it was almost blinding.
Luna nodded. “She loves the band too much. Not even you can change that.”
He looked down. That would have to be good enough, he decided—just the fact that you would stay, even if it wasn’t for him. Even if it was despite him.
“I-I hope you’re right,” he said quietly.
“Okay, so now—” Luna jumped onto the table to take a seat, “—tell me what happened with Sid.”
Ordinarily, this would have been a long story. But Jungkook knew Taehyung might have made telling it a bit easier for him.
“Taehyung said you know about the bet?” he asked to be sure.
“Yeah. He told me back in Tilburg after he saw you leave with her to talk. Or, well, he assumed you would talk,” Luna explained. “In any case, you should be grateful that I know my strengths. Otherwise, I’d be punching you, too.”
Considering how much smaller than him Luna was, Jungkook smiled reflexively.
“I appreciate you not doing that,” he said with genuine respect.
“I’ve mentally kicked your ass, though.”
“Well, I deserve that, I guess.”
“So, this was about the bet, then?”
Jungkook sighed. He hadn’t technically allowed Sid to say any additional adjectives after he’d called you “easy,” but even this was too much. Jungkook wasn’t sure if he could talk about it without wanting to rip Sid’s eyes out and feed them to him.
“He was… just riling me up. He said some—some things,” he said, choosing a gentler word, even though several more appropriate expletives came to mind. “And he took it too far. Trust me, he deserved to get hit.”
“Oh, I trust you,” Luna said. “I just don’t think you should have been the one to hit him.”
Jungkook swallowed, feeling a metallic taste in his mouth. It didn’t bother him much. He’d tasted worse in the past few days.
“If I didn’t do it,” he said, “no one else would have.”
“Why are you so sure about that?” Luna asked, her voice less confident.
Most of what she knew about Jungkook and Sid came from questionable fan accounts she’d seen online—the stories she read were almost always outrageous, but now that she’d gotten to know Sid on this tour, she found those accounts much more plausible. Surely then, if Sid was this loathsome to everyone, someone was bound to deck him sooner or later.
“Everyone else is afraid of him,” Jungkook replied.
“And you’re not?” she asked.
The question felt mocking—even though it didn’t sound like that was Luna’s intention.
He thumped his head against the wall. “I don’t know anything anymore.”
The room was silent for a few minutes as Jungkook sat motionless, and Luna’s gaze kept wandering to the pile of towels on the bloodstained floor and then back to his resigned figure against the wall.
“Can I ask you something?” she said then.
His voice was tired. “Yeah.”
“Why did you make this bet in the first place?”
He inhaled, and a sharp, stabbing pain shot up from his lungs to his throat. It probably wasn’t a good sign, but he did not have the energy to worry about it at the moment.
He scratched the uninjured side of his face with his hand—his knuckles bruised and torn—and let his fingers linger there. It was a reflexive reaction, Luna observed, as he tried to hide from her. Or, rather, from her question.
“I don’t know,” he finally said. “Sid and Jude were getting in my head about how I was like some—I don’t know, pathetic. They made me feel like I was less of a person because I still had feelings for her.”
“Less of a person,” Luna said, “or less of an asshole that they seem to be trying—and succeeding—to be?”
Jungkook sighed, allowing the pins and needles to settle in his oesophagus. He wanted to say something but swallowed the answer with the bitter taste in his mouth.
“So, you made the bet to prove them wrong?” she asked in response to his silence.
“I—I don’t know,” he said again. He sometimes felt like he was a different person when he was with his friends. And now that he was determined to never see Sid again—but the repercussions of their friendship were still evident—Jungkook didn’t know who he really was anymore. “I think, at first, I agreed to the bet to prove a point.”
Luna raised her eyebrows. “But there was another reason?”
“Yeah, I think that… there was something else,” he said with a slow nod. “I realised later that I might have agreed to the bet because I wanted to win it. Not—not for the money, and not just to prove that I wasn’t pathetic. I just really—I wanted to go on that date with her. I wanted her. And the bet was—it was a kick in my ass to finally act on my feelings.”
Luna’s eyebrows suddenly dropped in disappointment and she turned away to hide her expression, even though Jungkook was too weary to lift his head and look up.
“There were better ways to act on them, you know,” she said. “Less painful ways, too.”
“Oh, I know,” he said with a wry smile. “Unfortunately, I’m fucked up.”
“You… you’re not fucked up,” she said, although to be honest, after learning about the bet, she thought he might be. But now that she saw how much his choices tormented him, she realised that he wasn’t all black and white. He was very, very grey. “You just did a fucked-up thing.”
Jungkook snickered weakly. “That’s nice of you to say. But I was always… I’d always been a problem.”
“Because of your friends?”
“Yeah—well, mostly, yeah. B-but she—” he paused here as another jolt of pain shot through his chest at the mention of you. He filled his lungs completely with another sharp intake of breath, then tried again. “She still—she still loved me. You know? I used to look at my friends and think I had nothing compared to them. But then I met her, and I—I had everything. I didn’t deserve her, but I—she was with me. She wanted to be with me. And she was the one good thing in my life. And I took that for granted. And now that I—now that we… anyway. I blew it. Now I really have nothing. Serves me right, I know. I just wish she wasn’t—I wish I hadn’t hurt her.”
Luna closed her eyes and sighed in response to the endless additions that Jungkook could not seem to control as he spoke.
She felt a little upset, she couldn’t help it. But she also felt a little giddy. She’d never heard Jungkook say these things about you, but she’d suspected that was how he felt all along.
However, she wasn’t one to make empty promises, especially when those promises were not within her control, so she could not say things like ‘you two will be fine’ or ‘you didn’t blow it.’
Honestly, she couldn’t find an appropriate response no matter how much she tried, so for a good minute, the two of them sat in silence.
Then, Jungkook finally raised his eyes from the ground. “Why’d you come here, by the way? I thought everyone was on the bus.”
Luna blinked, remembering suddenly.
“I left my phone here after the show,” she said, instinctively checking her pockets to make sure she really did not have it.
“Oh.” He pointed to the opposite side of the room. “I think I heard it vibrate. On the couch.”
“Ah.” She pushed herself off the table. “Thanks.”
He watched through his eyelashes as she picked up her phone. One of his eyelids was dropping and he was afraid to blink.
When Luna glanced at the screen—and probably saw the missed call from Taehyung—Jungkook said, “you should go.”
She turned around and took in the scene in the room once more.
It was miserable here. Jungkook looked miserable.
“I’m sorry I can’t say anything encouraging,” she said, biting her lip. “She’s my friend. And you’ve done a—well, this isn’t good.”
Jungkook nodded and swallowed, but it didn’t soothe his dry throat. “I know.”
“I’d like to help, but I—I’m always going to be on her side.”
“Of course. I understand.”
Luna sighed, because he had claimed he understood, but still looked as if happiness was a concept he’d never experienced in his life.
“I just—I don’t know what to tell you before I go,” she admitted. She knew she didn’t owe him anything, but leaving him here in this state didn’t feel right, either. She had always been compassionate, but the intensity of it surprised her this time. “I don’t know what she’ll do. A-about you, I mean. Not about Reconnaissance.”
Jungkook considered this. The side of his head felt torn and cracked. The poor band-aids were already dark red.
“What would you do?” he asked.
Luna raised her eyebrows at the abrupt question. “Me?”
“If you were her,” Jungkook explained. “Or if I were Taehyung.”
She licked her lips, taking a moment to choose her next words.
“Jungkook,” she said. “No offence, but Taehyung would never do something so stupid.”
A defeated, humourless smile appeared on his lips. “Yeah. You’re right. He wouldn’t.”
As soon as the tiniest glimmer of hope in his eyes dimmed, his voice sounded as if it was coming from somewhere underground.
God, Luna thought. Now the room was even more dreary.
Even though she was going to support whatever decision you would make about this, she couldn’t just leave without saying anything to him. Having no one on his side while he tried to redeem himself was unfair.
Advice, she figured, had to be the best thing she could offer him right now.
“Listen,” she said with a determined inhale. “I can’t judge what I would do if I were her because I don’t share her memories. I don’t know what happened between you all those years ago. Or even what’s happening now. But… if I were you, I’d give her some time.”
Jungkook nodded, looking at her with what he hoped was a grateful smile.
“Interestingly enough, that’s what your boyfriend told me,” he said.
“Yeah? Well, he gives great advice.”
The corners of his lips stretched further. “Matching set, you two.”
Luna slid her phone into her pocket and grabbed her bag, zipping up the pocket where she had kept the band-aids.
“Just be careful, okay?” she said. “We’re leaving for the airport soon, so don’t stay here too long. Don’t make her look for you. I’ll, um—I’ll try to do damage control.”
“Okay. Thank—”
Before Jungkook could finish, the door of the changing room opened wider, diverting their attention.
They both turned to look with very different expressions on their faces—Luna was already scowling, thinking that Sid had come back. Jungkook, on the other hand, appeared absolutely terrified, thinking that it was you, about to witness him sitting on the bloody floor—literally—with band-aids on his face.
“Oh,” a gasp left Minjun’s lips as he stopped in the doorway. “Sorry, I was—”
“It’s fine,” Jungkook said, immensely relieved. “You can come in.”
“Hold on,” Luna warned. Minjun remained frozen under her gaze. “Will I have to intervene? Because I think we’ve spilt enough blood already.”
Minjun raised his eyebrows. “Whose blood?”
“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Jungkook said to the girl. “Thank you, Luna.”
She watched the two of them for another minute until Jungkook nodded reassuringly again. Hesitantly, she nodded back and gave Minjun a pointed look.
“Okay. But you watch your hands,” she warned. “He has to be on stage tomorrow.”
“I—I mean no harm.” Minjun raised both hands, taken aback by her hostility. “I don’t know what happened here, but I’m—I come in peace.”
“Good,” Luna said with a firm nod. She glanced back over her shoulder at Jungkook. “I’ll see you later. Put some ice on your eye when you get back on the bus. It won’t do much for the colour, but it might help with the swelling.”
“Will do,” he said and called out as she exited the room, “thank you again!”
After Luna had left, Minjun entered the room and closed the door behind him. Only then he noticed the bloody towels and the dirty floor. Squinting, he leant forward a little and detected something else between the towels.
“So,” he said, straightening. “What the fuck happened and whose tooth is that on the floor?”
Jungkook snorted. “Sid’s.”
Minjun’s face lit up with childlike glee. “No fucking way! Did you do it?”
“Yeah,” Jungkook said with a grin that made him look vaguely menacing, considering how bruised and battered his face was.
“Awesome, man,” Minjun said, coming closer to pat him on the back before squatting next to him.
“He deserved it.”
“I don’t even care, to be honest. I’m impressed.”
“Yeah. Well.” Jungkook lifted a hand to gesture at his own face. “He’s landed some good ones, too.”
Minjun observed his bruises and the bloody band-aids that seemed quite small for a normal cut, but remained remarkably resilient on his fresh wounds.
“You’ll live,” he concluded.
Jungkook turned to him. A little awkwardly, he asked, “why, um… why are you here?”
“Ah.” Minjun reached into his pocket for something. “Here.”
Jungkook immediately recognised the keys to his Katana in his friend’s palm.
Speechless for a minute, he just stared at Minjun’s hand without moving. He had a feeling—against his better judgement—that this was a trap. That by taking the keys, he’d sign something else to the devil.
“What—?” he tried to ask.
“Take it,” Minjun urged, wishing to relieve himself of the unwanted weight of the keys in his hand.
“But the bet—”
“Fuck the bet,” he said, waving his palm up and down when Jungkook still didn’t reach for it. “It went too far.”
“Sid,” Jungkook began, hesitation and doubt evident in every centimetre of his face, “didn’t agree to this.”
“Yeah, and I’m sure Sid’s mother didn’t agree to give birth to a fucking clown, but shit happens,” Minjun countered. “Take the damn keys.”
Jungkook finally extended his shaking hand and felt the familiar cold metal under his fingertips. He paused before pulling back with the keys.
The Katana was his. But instead of relief, he felt a new weight in his chest.
“Why?” he asked, looking down at the key ring, adorned with a gaudy, jewelled pendant with the initials “JK.” It was a trinket you had bought him during a drunken escapade at a local fair. He still remembered your delighted squeal when you spotted the two letters in one of the jewellery stands.
“Because this is stupid and pointless,” Minjun said. His legs had gone numb, so he mirrored Jungkook’s position and sat down on the floor, leaning his back against the wall. “Some fucking bet is not worth ruining your relationship over.”
With a small smile on his face—because they were two miserable losers, hanging out on the floor of his band’s changing room—Jungkook clutched the keys and pushed them into his own pocket.
“Thank you,” he said.
“I’m sorry I didn’t do it earlier,” Minjun said. “I was afraid, I guess. Of what Sid would do if I went against his wishes. But then I… came to pick you up from that hotel bar in Tilburg—”
“That was you?” Jungkook cut him off. He had been wondering how he ended up back on the tour bus.
“Yeah,” Minjun replied. “You called me and asked to take the bike back to the rental shop because you couldn’t do it anymore. Man, I swear, I thought you were on some bridge, the way you phrased it.”
Jungkook looked away. He was not in a good place when he called his friend, and alcohol must have exaggerated it. “Sorry.”
“You still looked worse than I expected when I got there,” Minjun continued. “I thought I might have to take you to a hospital to have your stomach pumped, and I don’t fucking speak Dutch. Nor did I know where a fucking hospital was in Tilburg.”
Jungkook laughed at his rising tone, and Minjun smiled, too.
The smile turned ironic, however, when he added, “you threw up on my shoes.”
Jungkook, who never got drunk enough to experience a hangover the next day, let alone throw up, raised his eyebrows in surprise.
“I don’t remember that,” he said, meaning that it didn’t happen.
Minjun ignored the dismissive tone in his voice—he had a ruined pair of Converse to prove his accusation.
“Lucky you then,” he retorted. “You regained some colour after that, though. But you wouldn’t stop talking about her. It was like—like you couldn’t understand anything of what was happening, but you could still remember her. It hit me then, how little the bet really mattered. I mean, I always thought it was stupid, but that night, I—I saw what you were feeling. You regretted everything. I wanted to give you the keys right then, but you looked like you couldn’t recognise yourself in the mirror, so I just dropped you off on the bus. One of your—Hoseok was awake. He thanked me.”
Jungkook needed a minute to reflect on the conversation he’d had with Hoseok later that same morning.
“He didn’t tell me,” he said.
Minjun shrugged. “He had nothing to thank me for, anyway. I’m your friend. Sorry I didn’t act like it before.”
This was the first time that one of his friends had apologised to him, and Jungkook recognised the significance of the moment. He realised with blinding clarity that out of the three people he had invited as his personal guests on this tour, there was only one he truly wanted to stay here.
“Yeah,” Jungkook said, a little overwhelmed. “I’m—thanks for doing this now.”
Minjun nodded and the two of them shared a moment of comfortable silence. But Jungkook couldn’t quiet his thoughts—Sid wasn’t here, but he still couldn’t shake his presence.
“There was something that Sid said to me today,” he spoke up. “I-I think he likes her.”
“What?” Minjun was surprised. He glanced back at the tooth on the floor in front of him. “What’d he say?”
“He—just some shit.” Jungkook looked down and pulled on a loose thread on his sweatpants. “About how he could have convinced her to date him.”
Minjun blinked in another wave of surprise. He had a very different understanding of what Sid felt for you and Jungkook, but now he was confused.
“He’s just trying to get under your skin,” he tried to rationalise.
“No, but think about it,” Jungkook said. “Why else would he go to such great lengths to persuade me to participate in this bet? To force me to continue it after I’d clearly won?”
Again, Minjun needed a minute to find a response.
Jungkook clicked his tongue and looked away. “See, you can’t disagree.”
“I mean…” Minjun bit the corner of his lower lip. “I guess it makes sense, but—”
“I know that she wouldn’t consider him in a million years,” Jungkook added. “I’m not even thinking about that, I’m just… wow. How fucking stupid. He ruined this for himself and for me.”
His friend sighed. He didn’t want to keep talking about this. “Yeah.”
“And I let him,” Jungkook finished.
“Yeah,” Minjun repeated. “He deserved getting his tooth knocked out. And you deserve the swollen eye.”
Jungkook raised his eyebrows and puckered his lips. He wasn’t going to disagree, and Minjun smiled in relief when he saw the humour in his friend’s eyes.
This had to happen, Minjun thought. Jungkook wouldn’t have been able to move on if he had not found another way to prove that his own self—and his relationship with you—was the one thing he would never lose, no matter how hard Sid tried.
“What, um,” Jungkook asked after a minute, “what are you going to do when Sid asks about the keys after the bet is over?”
Minjun, feeling much more relaxed, merely shrugged. “Knock another one of his teeth out?”
Jungkook laughed and smacked his friend on the shoulder, despite the pain in his head when he moved.
“Oh, come on,” Minjun said, grinning. “He still has, like, fifteen left.”
“I’m sure he has more left. Implants or not.”
“Now, see, implants are harder to knock out. We’d have to meet and discuss the logistics of that. Perhaps attack in secret.”
Jungkook laughed again, and Minjun joined in, too.
They both felt significantly better.
However, Jungkook still had a lot of things to take care of as soon as he got up from the floor.
He should have told you about the bet earlier, but he hadn’t. All he could do now was make amends for a lapse in judgement with terrible consequences.
No.
There would be no consequences. He would make sure to never hurt you again.
And he’d begin by following through with his plan.
Jungkook asked Minjun to give him some time alone and found his phone in the pocket of his sweatpants. He dialled Seokjin’s number, and Seokjin referred him to the Head of Security on tour, Mick.
Mick was lovely. He fostered pets and looked after injured animals in his cabin on the edge of the forest, where he lived with his three dogs. Jungkook had visited him once and felt very much like he imagined Harry Potter to feel when he saw Hagrid’s hut for the first time.
Mick was also three times larger than Jungkook. His primary responsibility on tour was preventing intoxicated individuals from climbing onto the stage and ensuring trespassers did not decide to have an excursion on the band’s tour bus.
Now, Jungkook decided as he spelled Sid’s name to Mick over the phone, Mick was going to make sure that Isidore Hamlet Mercer-Hastings—a name that likely had Shakespeare himself rolling in his grave—could not enter any venue where Rated Riot was scheduled to perform.
It wasn’t quite as dramatic as a restraining order, Jungkook supposed. But blacklisting Sid from his gigs seemed like a good start.
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Half an hour later, Jungkook had barricaded himself behind the curtains in his bunk. He was fully awake but he didn’t want you to see what he looked like.
Naturally, you had assumed he was sleeping and had no reason to talk to him anyway, so you kept yourself busy with an e-book in your bunk as the bus made its way to the airport.
Then, most unfortunately, your relative peace was disturbed when you received a text message from Nick Zhou. It was as if he could sense the terrible turmoil in your mind and your heart, and he wanted to add more fuel to the fire.
Things like that happened sometimes, you thought. Coincidences—unless you decided to treat them as signs.
Nick had sent you a picture of the perfectly green palm trees visible through a window. You zoomed in and assumed that he had taken the picture somewhere in Australia, where Reconnaissance were currently on tour.
In the text below, Nick said, “new album in progress. Would be nice to have you with us when we put it out!”
Anxious suddenly, you considered putting your phone away and just carrying on with your e-book. But your uncertainty was relentless—maybe if you replied to him, you’d gain a clearer understanding of what you should do.
You typed back, “hope you’re having fun! I’m still thinking about it.”
Then you exhaled and tossed your phone to the farthest corner of your bunk so as not to be bothered in case it vibrated again. Texting him back didn’t work. You felt just as tense as before.
You exhaled and attempted to keep reading, but silence was simply not meant for you today.
With the flight to Manchester only five hours away, Luna decided it was a good time to discuss with you what had happened in the changing room.
“Hey,” she whispered as she crept up to your bunk, moving stealthily and quietly as if she were a secret agent on a mission.
You looked up at her from your screen. “Hi.”
She wanted to talk to you, but now that she was doing it—or getting to it—she didn’t quite know how to proceed; or even where to begin, actually.
“So, um,” she said, sitting down on your bunk and taking her time to find a comfortable position. You put your tablet away and watched her. “I wanted to check up on you a little.”
You smirked. “Yeah? But not a lot?”
“Not yet.” She smiled at your teasing question. “You’re not critical, but I do think I have some cause for concern.”
You pulled yourself up and pushed a pillow behind your back to sit straighter. “What makes you think that?”
“Well, you and Jungkook seem to be avoiding each other.”
You regarded her for a minute until you reached the inevitable conclusion—you suspected it yesterday, and now Luna’s knowing gaze fully convinced you that it was true.
“You know about the bet,” you said.
Luna looked around. No one on the bus appeared to be listening. Nearly everyone that she could see either had headphones on, or had their curtains drawn.
She glanced back at you and settled her gaze on the corner of your dark brown blanket.
“Yes,” she admitted. “I found out about it at the same time as you, more or less. Jungkook had, um—he’d talked to Taehyung before he told you.”
“Ah,” you said. “Well, that’s—I’m glad we all know, then.”
Luna noted the imperceptible look in your eyes. She wasn’t sure if you’d meant what you said.
Really, you weren’t sure, either. On the one hand, you were relieved that you wouldn’t have to retell what had happened to your friend. You weren’t sure you’d manage.
But on the other hand, the fact that other people knew about the bet did not feel particularly comforting—because this was one of the situations that you’d been desperate to avoid: your relationship with Jungkook getting so out of hand that the people around you began to talk about it.
However, you had been thinking a lot in the last few days and you realised that learning about the bet had helped you find some relief, too.
There was something bothering you for weeks now, something that was off in your surroundings, and now you finally knew what it was. It felt like a crooked picture frame on the wall. Like a non-alphabetical arrangement of books on a shelf. Like a bet about your relationship.
And now that you knew, the world had realigned again. You would have been able to breathe easier if you weren’t so embarrassed that other members of your team also knew about it.
“Well, aside from that,” Luna went on, keeping a careful eye on any changes in your expression. “I talked to Jungkook today. And I’m not defending him—”
“If you say ‘but’ next,” you interrupted, “that will negate your point, you know.”
“However,” Luna said instead and you rolled your eyes. “I think the bet is only half the picture. I mean, it’s shit. He fucked up. But I think that he’s been with you because he really wanted to be. Not because of the bet.”
If you had shaken your head any more vigorously, it might have flown off. Luna was slightly annoyed by your adamant rejection of everything she was saying—which made it easier for her to tell you the news.
“He fought Sid,” she said.
You frowned. “So?”
“Knocked his tooth out, I think.”
Your frown turned into shock as your eyebrows shot up nearly all the way to your hairline. When Luna said that they fought, you obviously did not expect it to be a physical altercation.
“They fought?”  you repeated.
“Yeah. Because Sid can’t keep his mouth shut,” she said. “Jungkook loathes the guy. I don’t know what sort of friendship they had before, but there’s none of that left. If I hadn’t walked in, I don’t know—I mean, he—he hates him.” Luna swallowed here, figuring that additional details might make it harder for her to make her point. “But more than that, it looked to me like Jungkook just hates himself. Now, what you want to do next, that’s up to you. I just wanted to tell you what I thought. I talked to him. He was miserable.”
“Well.” You swallowed. “He lost the bet.”
“Not about the bet. He has feelings for you. Real feelings.”
“How—”
“Don’t ask me how I know that,” she cut you off before you could ask exactly that. “These things you can just see. And it’s especially obvious in him. Because, look… Here are the facts. He had the option to keep the bet a secret from you. Or he could have gotten back together with you and won the bet. If not, he could have waited for this to pass, or until his friends told you. But he was the one who told you that he fucked up. That’s got to count for something. It’s okay if it’s not enough. But it—well, it sort of feels like a start. Because he finally got it through his thick head that this is what matters. You. He loves you.”
Your skin shivered—an automatic reaction to these words—but you scoffed. “And knocking out Sid’s tooth is a way to show it.”
Luna groaned and was about to protest, but you stopped her by shaking your head again.
“Luna—I mean—thank you, but… this is the same shit again,” you said. “The exact same shit that made us break up the first time. Except now, there’s so much more at stake. It’s no longer just about us.”
“Is it?” she asked. “Is it, really? I mean, I understand why you would think that, considering your—uh, your job. But it’s… Really, it’s just you. The two of you. As it’s always been.”
You sighed and pulled the sleeves of your turtleneck down until you could hide your fists in them. You kept your gaze on the blanket beneath you—undoubtedly disagreeing with her again—and Luna let out a soft, tired breath.
“I’m—whatever you do next, I’ll be on your side,” she said. “If you walk away, I walk away. It’s simple. I just think it’d do you two good to talk this out. When you’re ready. So that you would know what you’re walking away from.”
You were starting to shake your head again, but stopped abruptly, realising the futility of it. You weren’t actually disagreeing with Luna’s point, after all.
“It would be good,” you said. “But I don’t want to talk to him about this. This was a mistake from the very beginning.”
“So… what, then?” she asked, worried about the burden of even more unresolved feelings that you would have to carry around every day if you allowed this to linger. If this became another thing that you never talked to anyone about. “You think you can just go back to the way things were?”
“No,” you said. “Because I’m still very annoyed. But after that, then yeah. Ideally.”
Luna tried to conceal her skepticism, but it was evident in the way she sucked in her lips and nodded her head. “Okay.”
You raised an eyebrow. “Thanks for the optimism?”
She sighed and turned to face you again.
“I get it,” she said. “I understand why you don’t want to see him right now. But I also… kind of understand why he did what he did.”
Your eyebrows rose again. “Why he made the bet?”
“No,” she said, raising her index finger and closing her eyes to emphasise her point. “Not that. That I don’t understand. I meant the fight with Sid. Sid is a big reason why you’re in this situation and Jungkook had no other choice left. He got into that fight because he’s shit at choosing friends, but he loves you.”
You ran your tongue over your lips and looked back down at your blanket. “I don’t know which one of those things outweighs the other one.”
“Yeah, well, think about that,” she said. “Then talk to him.”
You were both aware that giving this advice was much easier than actually following it, and a silent minute passed without either of you looking at each other as you pondered the future.
“Nick texted me,” you said suddenly. You hadn’t realised how much his message weighed on you until you told her. “Just to check in. And, uh, to remind me of his—his offer.”
Luna did not like this, and she was glad you weren’t looking at her and didn’t see the expression on her face.
“What did you tell him?” she asked.
“I told him I’m still thinking about it.”
You felt Luna shifting her weight and fidgeting on the bunk next to you. She was uncomfortable, you could tell.
“You’re, uh… you’re really thinking about this, then?” she asked.
You threw your head back and rested it on the pillow. “I’m thinking about a lot these days.”
“Well, that’s—that’s good. Right?” she said, quietly hoping that your contemplations would eventually lead you to a decision that would cause you less suffering. She didn’t think leaving Rated Riot was that decision. You had made a family here. “Take your time with these things. Really think them through. Avoid everyone for a short while if that’s what you need.”
“Hmm. How can I avoid everyone, though?” you asked dryly. “If Jungkook got into a fight, I need to see him.”
“Ah.” Luna finally looked at you, feeling guilty somehow, as if she was the one who had punched him. “Yeah, that’s probably true. He, um—it’s not a disaster, but he did miss a couple of, uh—”
“Is he bleeding?” you asked, appreciating her effort to convey the situation without causing you alarm, but also without downplaying it.
“Well, not anymore,” she said. “At least, he wasn’t the last time I saw him. There is a, um—a black eye situation, though.”
You groaned and dropped your hands on the mattress in irritation.
“Fuck—you see? He’s doing it again. Leaving me no choice but to—oh, fuck it.” You slapped your hands on your knees and sat up straight. “He’ll have to wait until we arrive at the airport. I’m done jumping at the slightest sound he makes, manager or not.”
“I agree with that,” Luna said. “But I see that you don’t really mean it.”
You closed your eyes. “I have to mean it. I know it’s my job, and I know Jungkook never forced me into anything I didn’t consent to, but he just—this whole time, he acted like he was genuine when he was just doing what he always does. Playing along with Sid’s sick little games. Maybe he deserves to bleed a little for that.”
Luna was about to argue, but only nodded. She was very glad you were talking about this, even though you had dismissed everything she’d told you about Jungkook’s feelings.
She knew that you needed more time. You’d heard her. You just had to be in the right frame of mind to believe her.
She knew you’d get there, just as she knew Jungkook was not going to give up on you.
“Yeah,” Luna finally said. “He can wait. Do you... want to talk about it? About what he did?”
You looked murderous. “Absolutely not.”
She expected as much.
“Well, in that case,” she pulled her phone out, “you want to see something that Crowley did to my mum’s curtains? She took a video to show me.”
Your tension seemed to fade straight away. Luna’s troublemaker cat—named aptly after a Supernatural character with a redemption arc that Crowley, the cat, could only dream about—had never failed to ease your mind.
You needed some time alone. And you were very happy to be alone with her as she stretched out on the mattress next to you and played the video on her phone.
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You caught glimpses of Jungkook and his heavy sunglasses on the way to your gate at the airport, but you didn’t have the time to check how bad he looked. The other Rated Riot members had already smacked him on the back of his head after they saw his band-aids, so you decided to wait until you could talk to him in private.
About an hour later, you spotted him going to the men’s room. You waited a few minutes and stood up, too.
The restroom was empty except for the two of you, and you quietly placed your carry-on bag on the ground next to the door. Jungkook hadn’t even noticed you enter.
“There you are,” you announced from the doorway.
Jungkook flinched and splashed himself as he washed his hands in front of the wall-sized mirror.
“You were—were you looking for me?” he asked. The automatic sink stopped and he moved his hands back under the faucet to get the water running again.
“I’ve been informed you have a black eye,” you said, coming closer. “I wanted to check the damage myself.”
The side of his face that was visible to you showed no signs of injury, but when you looked at his reflection in the mirror, you saw the red and purple bruises on the side of his face, concealed by a few persistent band-aids.
Jungkook swallowed and shook his hands several times to dry them. Then, he stepped back, allowing you to examine him. “Well, here I am.”
“Here you are,” you repeated. His gaze remained fixed on yours as you scanned his features. “Want to tell me what happened?”
“Not really,” he said. “Want to tell me if you’re leaving to work with Reconnaissance?”
“Not really.”
He pursed his lips. “Well, then. Can I ask—”
“No,” you said immediately. He stopped speaking and clenched his jaw.
You were contemplating if you should have taken him to the hospital before the flight. You were also thinking about what to do with his bruises tomorrow since he had a performance, and appearing on stage with a black eye did not seem particularly professional.
“Does it hurt?” you asked. “These band-aids—did you change them?”
“No,” he said. It wasn’t clear which question he was responding to, but his answer seemed to fit both.
“You need to change them,” you said. “And clean the wounds properly.”
“I’m not going to a hospital.”
You sighed. “Why not?”
“Because it’s not that bad,” he said.
You looked back at the band-aids on the side of his face. They remained on his skin through the sheer force of will. Cuts and bruises peeked from underneath the dried blood.
“It looks bad with band-aids on,” you said. “I can only imagine what it looks like without.”
“It’s fine,” he insisted. “Luna said so.”
You knew right away that this was impossible; Luna would have known better.
“She said no such thing,” you replied.
“Okay, maybe she didn’t,” he conceded with a quiet groan. “But I’m still not going to the hospital.”
The irony of the moment—and how you’d insisted that you were okay a few days ago, just like he was doing now—was completely lost on you. You felt exhausted.
“Why…” you started to say, then sighed as you brought your fingers over your closed eyes. “Why are you making me do this?”
“Do what?”
“Clean your self-destructive wounds.”
“They’re not self-destructive—”
“Really?” Your eyes shot open, ablaze with agitation. “So, getting punched by Sid was, what? A fight for dominance that you’d planned in advance?”
He cleared his throat with indignation and continued his previous statement, “and I’m not making you clean my wounds. I’m fine.”
“Sit down,” you said, turning to grab your carry-on bag. “You’re not fine.”
Awkwardly swaying in the same spot, Jungkook looked around. “Where do you want me to sit? We’re in a public bathroom.”
“Jesus, Jungkook!” you groaned irritably. You were too tired to think of every little detail, every action, and reaction. You just wanted to take a nap on the plane. “I don’t care. Sit on the floor. Or on the toilet.”
“Neither seems sterile…”
“Good thing you didn’t get punched in the ass, then.”
He huffed but still went into one of the cubicles, lowered the toilet lid with a scrunched nose and sat down on it.
He leaned over to hold the door open with his hand until you entered a few minutes later. Before either of you could grasp how small the space was now that you were in the closed cubicle, you took out the antiseptic spray from your amateur medical kit and grabbed a cotton pad. By that point, Jungkook was too worried about what you’d do to think about how close you were.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” he asked.
Concerned, he watched you pull a blue latex glove on one of your hands and spray the antiseptic into the air, aiming it at the floor to test it.
“No,” you admitted, taking a step towards him and stopping between his legs. With your gloved hand, you carefully peeled off the heavy band-aids from his face and tossed them into an empty plastic bag you’d brought for this specific purpose. “But neither did you when you picked a fight with Sid, so I think we’re even.”
He grimaced as the exposed lacerations on his skin immediately began to sting. “W-what makes you think I was the one who started that fight?”
“The fact that you won’t tell me what it was about,” you replied, bending your knees slightly to inspect his face. You were willing to help him look after his wounds, but changing the bandages was as far as you’d go—if he needed stitches, you’d drag him to the nearest emergency room.
“You know what it was about,” he mumbled, staring at the floor.
“I don’t.”
He didn’t want to say it. You knew he didn’t want to say it—that was why you were making him do it.
“It started about the bet,” he admitted finally. “But then he… said some things I didn’t like. Not that I liked what he said about the bet, either. But I got myself into that mess, so I—”
“What did he say?” you asked, interrupting his diversion.
You covered his left eye with a cotton pad to protect it, shook the bottle of antiseptic a few times, and sprayed it on the exposed wounds.
Jungkook winced as he felt the stinging pain grow sharper. He clutched the lid of the toilet seat, forgetting all about how he’d avoided touching it before.
“Just… some bullshit about you,” he said through clenched teeth.
Surprised, you pulled back to look at him. “He said something about me?”
“Yeah. So I socked him in the cheek.”
You watched him for a quiet minute.
Honestly, if Sid had said something about you, you probably would have punched him yourself if Jungkook hadn’t. But the way Jungkook phrased this—and this whole situation, in general—was so ridiculous that you had to bite the inside of your cheek to maintain a straight face.
“In the mouth,” you corrected. “Or so I hear.”
Jungkook couldn’t subdue the smile on his lips at the amusement that you tried very hard to hide. So, you knew about Sid’s tooth then.
“That was after he wouldn’t stop talking,” he said.
“Ah. Well,” you returned to work and gently patted his cheek with the cotton pad to remove the excess antiseptic, “I appreciate you defending my honour.”
“You don’t sound like it.”
You scoffed. “What do you want me to do? Jump on your white horse and ride off into the sunset with you?”
The light-hearted tone of your voice suddenly amplified your close proximity—he felt his legs tremble slightly as you stood between them to reach his face better. He wanted to reach out and wrap himself around you, to thank you, and to apologise again.
Instead, he cleared his throat and lowered his gaze.
“Well, that’d be nice,” he muttered. Then, added louder, “or, at the very least, you could stop burning me.”
“I’m disinfecting,” you said as you leaned in again, checking if the spray had absorbed into his bruises yet. His breath caught in his throat. You added, “I think.”
Jungkook didn’t think he’d ever felt a longing so intense that it could overshadow all physical pain.
“You think,” he repeated breathlessly. “Th—that’s reassuring.”
“It’s what my mum used to use when my brother and I would get cuts or scratches, and things like that,” you explained defensively. “Of course, this is hardly a scratch in your case, but I have nothing better to offer.”
He didn’t mean to come across as accusatory. He didn’t know what he was saying at all. You still smelled like apples. He was afraid he would pass out.
“This is fine,” he said.
He knew that you were already doing more than your job description entailed and your personal relationship permitted, and he was grateful for it. He hadn’t meant to cause you any additional problems, and he wanted to inform you of the steps he’d taken to fix the ones he’d already caused.
He waited until you had finished searching through your medical kit before speaking again.
“I, um—I banned Sid from Rated Riot shows,” he said.
You turned to look at him so quickly that a tired muscle in your neck spasmed in protest. “What?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Mick will take care of it if he shows up.”
“Mick—you banned Sid?”
“I banned Sid,” he repeated slowly, giving you a minute to process the news. “It’s done. I don’t—I never should have brought him to Europe with me.”
You straightened and attempted to compose yourself, but your mind was suddenly bombarding you with question marks and software errors every time you tried to form a coherent thought.
“Well, that’s—that’s right,” you finally said, clearing your throat. “And it’s about time you realised that.”
You didn’t know what else to say. Congratulating him right now, considering the repercussions of his last confrontation with Sid, seemed in poor taste.
Not to mention, you were a little confounded. After your last argument outside the bus, you’d expected a lot of drunk nights and a lot of new mayhem that you would have to put back in order. You weren’t expecting mature decisions.
Jungkook didn’t notice the utter shock in your voice, however, because his pulse tried to deafen him with a dreadful paranoia, telling him that this was too little and too late.
Notenough-notenough-notenough, the beat of his heart echoed in his ears.
“I know,” Jungkook said, louder than he’d intended. “I’m sorry it took me so long.”
You pulled out a new cotton pad and mumbled something under your breath.
Jungkook gazed up at you as you hovered over him with your medical kit. “Can I—can I ask you something, though?”
You gently wiped the side of his temple where the antiseptic had dripped, all while trying to calm down the chaos in your mind. “What?”
“Why didn’t you tell me about Reconnaissance?”
There was a long pause as you returned to your kit—more for the purpose of giving yourself some time to think rather than out of necessity.
“I don’t know,” you finally said. “I wasn’t seriously considering it, and it never came up in a casual conversation.”
“We spent three days in Amsterdam, just the two of us,” he said. “How could it not come up?”
You gave him a look. “Really? You think you can ask me that when you knew—and participated—in the bet for weeks before telling me about it?”
Jungkook looked down. “It wasn’t weeks...”
“Well, fantastic.”
Unsettled by your sarcasm, he added, “and I told you, eventually.”
“No, I actually guessed it before you told me,” you said with one hand on your hip as you gazed at the restroom wall behind him, deep in thought. “I told you that you were only acting like that because of some external force. And you really were doing it to win a—”
“No.” He shook his head so fiercely that you almost worried he’d injure himself more. “The bet gave me a push. But I wanted you all along, and—”
“No,” you disagreed, turning away to throw the used cotton pads into the plastic bag. “You—just—just don’t.”
He already knew that this would be the wrong thing to say before he even said it. He simply couldn’t control himself—but he tried to now.
“I’m just—I’m trying to say that this hurt me, too,” he said slowly. “You’re—you might leave to work with a different band. A-and I was the only one who didn’t know about that.”
“I—”
“I know,” he continued louder, “that this is not the same as what I did. It’s not even close. But I still—I feel like this should have been something you talked to me about.”
You sighed and grabbed a glass bottle of iodine-based ointment from your bag. “It probably was.”
“Are you really considering it?” he asked. “Leaving, I mean.”
So much had changed since you told Maggie and Luna that you’d stay, and repeated the same to Yoongi and Namjoon.
All you could say to Jungkook now was a dejected, “I don’t know.”
The tight grip of pain around his chest did not ease, but he didn’t expect it to. Not yet, at least.
“I’m truly sorry,” he said, lifting his gaze. Both of you quickly averted your eyes as if the eye contact burnt. “For this and… for everything.”
You nodded in acknowledgement of the apology but did not reply to it.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Reconnaissance,” you said instead. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”
He nodded back and you continued to work in silence. You were glad that your current task required your full attention, so you did not have to linger on how wounded he looked—not just physically, but somehow intrinsically, too. If you glanced at him, all the tears and cuts and bruises on his heart would have been as visible as they were on his face.
You applied the ointment to his temple now that the antiseptic had dried—and Jungkook clenched his teeth again, keeping the painful hiss contained. The ointment was probably excessive, and it might dye his skin an odd shade of purple, but you didn’t know what else to do.
When you looked closer, his cuts didn’t appear deep enough to require stitches, so all you could do at the moment was ensure they didn’t become infected – and this questionable procedure should have accomplished that.
You pressed some gauze to the more severe wounds and bandaged them—as much as you could. You used smaller band-aids for the less serious cuts. Then, you stepped back to look.
This would need work. He looked like he slammed the side of his head into a wall and a toddler had attempted to provide first aid.
“This should hold for now before I come up with something else,” you said. “I have to go. I’ll need to find a way to incorporate this,” you gestured around his face, “into your look for tomorrow’s show.”
You turned to push the cubicle door open, then stopped short when you felt his cold, tentative fingers wrap around your wrist.
“Wait,” he said, releasing your hand as soon as he noticed you looking down at his grip. “Just… just tell me what’s going to happen.”
“With your face?” you asked with a confused frown. “It’s going to hurt for a while probably, but it—”
“With us,” he cut you off.
You looked away, maintaining your posture even as your heart refused to listen to your mind and proceeded to pound furiously in your chest.
“There’s no ‘us’,” you said.
“You can’t say that.” He stood up and suddenly reduced the empty space between you in the cubicle. “Not after everything that happened.”
‘Everything that happened’ seemed to have a bitter flavour—he could see the distaste on your face as your tongue prodded your cheek.
“It was obviously a mistake,” you said.
You remembered it all, you knew what it meant. But you didn’t want to trust any of the moments in your memory.
Jungkook could taste your bitterness in his own mouth.
You added ruthlessly, “and it’s over.”
“What’s over?” he asked. He tried to place a hand on his hip, but his trembling fingers slid down his hoodie and his hand dropped to his side.
“Whatever this is,” you said, and each of your following words felt like a new scratch deep inside of him. “Whatever you were doing to win your bet, and whatever I was stupidly playing along with.”
There was nothing but a few breaths separating the two of you in this cubicle, yet you may as well have been in a different orbit entirely. Desperate, Jungkook raised his hands to the back of his head and intertwined his fingers.
“I wasn’t—it wasn’t because of the bet,” he protested—not for the first time. With one more shake of your head, you turned around and pushed the door of the cubicle open. “Look, wait! I’m sorr—”
“It’s over, Jungkook,” you said, pausing halfway. “Stop.”
“How can it—I don’t—just—just tell me this one thing, okay? Before you go,” he pleaded, following you out of the cubicle and watching you toss your medical kit into your carry-on.
There was a hint of sadness in your eyes when you looked up. “What?”
“If there was no bet, wou—would you have agreed to be with me again?”
Your pulse reverberated in your mind, shrieking and piercing, as you shook your head and turned away.
“If there was no bet,” you said, “you wouldn’t have even wanted to be with me again.”
For a minute, you both watched the floor in thick, pain-coated silence. It consumed you, this otherworldly quietness—your thoughts stilled, even your bodies seemed to pause and wait.
That wasn’t true, Jungkook wanted to say—and should have said. But he was so tired of saying things and having to defend them, to prove he meant them.
He wondered if there was anything he could say to you from this point on that you would believe. He loved you so much—he’s never loved anyone else, the very idea of it did not seem possible—yet he made you think he wasn’t serious.
He watched you leave—again—and felt his chest shrink to accommodate the slowing of his heartbeat—again, again—as he struggled to inhale, let alone open his mouth—again, again, again—realising, slowly, that there might not be enough words in existence to fix this.
“I love you,” he still tried, but the restroom door had already closed and he wasn’t sure if you’d heard him. Or if it made a difference if you did.
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There was something very ironic about the plans you had for the rest of the day once the plane landed in Manchester.
The concert was originally scheduled for tomorrow, but the venue had suffered a flood from a broken pipe a few nights ago, causing everything that the organisers had promised you to be ruined. They tried to fix it, but they needed some more time. You found out on the plane that the concert would have to be postponed until the day after tomorrow.
To make matters worse, Ren, the bassist of Poison Tongue—Rated Riot’s opening act—had broken his foot at the airport (you were afraid to ask how) and was hospitalised, rendering the band incapable of performing. You needed to find a replacement on extremely short notice.
This was a crisis, but only another one of many. You hadn’t slept at all on the plane, but despite your pounding headache, you were grateful for a chance to keep busy, and you had a precise plan of action.
You would find the venue staff and direct them to Seokjin—after checking if Seokjin was even here.
Next, you would make sure the equipment arrived safely and unpacking it at the damaged venue did not pose any risk to your team.
After that, you would seek Maggie’s help with an online ad for a new opening act.
Then, you would call the label and sweet-talk them before the inevitable black-eye pictures.
You would also devise a plan to handle the aforementioned black eye, which, hopefully, will have improved by the time of the concert.
And, most importantly, you would avoid Jungkook.
Really, the plan was almost foolproof. You figured your to-do list would continue to expand, even after you completed certain tasks, so you essentially had no chance of being left alone with your thoughts or accidentally running into him.
But then, on your way out of the band’s dressing room, you noticed that your surroundings were spinning more than usual. It happened occasionally, this abrupt lightheadedness after you stood up too quickly. But this time, it persisted even after you crossed the corridor.
You tried to tell yourself that this wasn’t anything new, you were just overwhelmed. This had to be the stress—you hadn’t slept and you had so much to do that it was normal to feel dizzy.
You kept walking. Until you had to trace your hand along the patterns of the wallpaper on the wall to stay steady. Until the edges of your vision blurred. Until the wet floorboards beneath your feet wobbled. Until the room grew dark.
You thought you could feel yourself leaning against the wall and slowly lowering your body to the floor. You thought you could feel the damp floor under your fingertips. You thought you could hear someone’s voice in the distance.
For a split moment before you collapsed, it occurred to you that you were really very tired. And that Jungkook had warned you about having another fainting spell if you weren’t careful.
But then your heart rate restricted the flow of blood to your brain, and there was not a single conscious thought left in your vacant mind.
As it happened sometimes—coincidences, unless you treated them as signs—Jungkook was the one who found you.
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chapter title credits: sleep token, “blood sport”
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machiavellli · 6 months
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Some spicy Theodore Nott headcanons˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚
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Notes: this was like driving: I don't have a driver license. Seriously like, you absolutely hyped me up for writing this and now I feel like I need to go touch some grass and drink some holy water.
Btw we shouldn't feel ashamed, like the first people ever to write in a language that is more similar to ours, literally wrote about about two nun fuck1ng him 108 times (yes that's what he says) in a week bc they thought he was mute. Like women in the 700 were DYING bc of novels, bc they couldn't never have enough of it and the majority developed a masturbat1on add1ction. We can't be worse, that's just humanity at its core: we are h0rny creatures.
⚠️: The blue parts are from a poem, from the author Giacomo da Lentini and it's called "Meravigliosamente" (| put a translation at the end, because it's ancient Italian and you can't translate it with a normal translator). It's one of my favorites poems ever, it's one the best incarnation of what love feels like. Yeah now the poets are cursing at me from above.
Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! 18+!!Breeding k1nk, p in v, ora1 f receiving, pregnant! reader description, nak3d people in general (idk what to put, BUT YOU HAVE BEEN ADVISED). English is not my first language, therefore you could find some mistakes, please report them to me!
With all being said: enjoy<3
—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—
Theodore Nott, your Italian Slytherin guy:
Theo loves to love as we already established.
He loves to give, he would let his blood dry for you.
Therefore he likes to take care of his dear ones, especially you, il suo tesoro.
I also already told you about how he will think about your future together, how he would love to have a proper family with you.
He just wants to have what his family wasn't capable of giving him.
So when the seventh year it's over, it also means that his only obstacle, the one that used to keep him away from his dream, is also over.
Something changes inside of him, un istinto primario prende il sopravvento. He knows that now it is actually possible.
«Meravigliosamente
un amor mi distringe
e soven ad ogn'ora.»
Maybe the first few months it wouldn't be so evident, he would probably keep it for himself.
He wouldn't like to put pressure on you, he couldn't.
But every time you get intimate, tutte le volte che fate l'amore, he can't help but think what it will feel like letting himself go completely.
Letting it happen.
Letting himself have a proper release.
Letting himself paint your inside white.
His warm finding the embrace of your core.
Planting a life, creating it with il suo tesoro, la sua diletta.
That's the ultimate dream e cazzo quanto lo vorrebbe.
«Com'omo che ten mente
in altro exemplo pinge
la simile pintura,
cosi, bella, facc'eo,
che’nfra lo core meo
porto la tua figura.»
But for now he still has to curse within himself, "cazzo, cazzo, cazzo.", imprisoning that release, that dream.
Simply wishing he could stay inside, saving every drop for you.
It's so hard for him to distract himself from the heavy daydreaming.
His mind as pregnant with thoughts as he wish you were.
You would just look so gorgeous round with his child.
And he would easily do everything under the sight of your new silhouette.
(As he wasn't already totally lost in this love, this passion per la sua bella)
This particular scene keeps repeating in his cursed mind:
You, full and completely bare before him sitting on your shared bed, nonchalantly putting cream on every inch of your skin after a shower.
He might be at the doorstep looking from afar or already on the bed
But it always ends with him interrupting you, taking your hands with devotion, already giving you passions with just his eyes, just for him to say: "dimmi quello che desideri e sarà tuo"
And he would literally do anything.
«Al cor m'ard'una doglia,
com'om che te lo foco
a lo suo seno ascoso,
e quanto più lo'nvoglia,
tanto arde più loco
e non po star incluso»
He would let you exploit his tongue in favor of your pleasure, savoring every drop coming from down there.
Growling just at your moist sight
And he would taste you like a starved man.
Over and over again.
On the bed,
On the Couch,
At the dinner table.
Sempre e ovunque.
Holding you still with one of his firm hands on your now round stomach.
Non è mai stato così facile inginocchiarsi e predicare da quando la sua religione, la sua donna angelo, sei diventata tu.
You look like a miracle to him.
And he would absolutely get lost in this strong trance filled with amore, passione e lussuria.
He would delicately lay your figure on the bed, like the most precious Greek statue of a goddess.
But the softness of your skin will make him realize that you are not a vision, but his blessed reality.
Your fullness getting in the way would quickly become the most delicious sight ever in his eyes.
His dead stare penetrating your soul along with his physical body.
He would tell you that his eyes look gone because he is convinced to be already dead and already in Paradise.
So lost in the haze, so convinced of the woman under him to be an angel.
And now, he is making her la madre dei suoi figli, sua moglie, la sua fiamma, da qui all'eternità.
Your legs, now afar from each other, looking like the most rare prophecy.
The softness of your skin feeling like the salvation from every sin.
Your swollen breast moving along his movements in you, rhythmically, like a fine melody.
And if by chance a single tear of your product falls from them, his eyes would shine like the sun during August.
He won't esitate to collect it with his mouth, tasting yet another one of your miracles. He wouldn't hold back the raw attitude taking over his mind, he simply couldn't.
«Assai v'aggio laudato,
madonna, in tutte parti
di bellezze ch'avete.»
When you two got together he thought he couldn't love you more, the same on your wedding day, but now he would simply let this love tear him apart he would still and always pray in your name.
In the morning he would wake you up gently, caressing you cheeks, watching as the eyes that caught his soul slowly open.
He would prepare breakfast for you, taking it directly in bed.
And every day will only be about you and you only.
Need a bath? Already prepped and warm amore.
You have swollen feet? A massage from him is mandatory.
Need to put the nursery together? Consider it done.
And don't get me started on the amount of stuff that he would buy for your unborn child.
He just wants to make sure everything will be ready for the big day.
But that's just a dream, playing tricks with his mind.
«Canzonetta novella,
va canta nova cosa;
lèvati da maitino
davanti a la più bella,
fiore d'ogn'amorosa,
bionda più ch'auro fino»
"Theo, darling, are you still here?" you ask him after two solid minutes of him staring at you, to the point that you were starting to feel suffocated by his gaze.
His pupils blown, and as his breathing increase, he finally snaps back from daydreaming.
But now, now it's been months of this agony, della sua mente completamente offuscata dal desiderio.
He just can't help himself anymore, he is a direct and honest person, he can't continue to keep this away from you.
And with the most serious expression known to mankind and his eyes firmly buried into yours, he doesn't hesitate anymore:
"Facciamo un figlio amore, facciamolo adesso, non ne posso più d'aspettare, non posso più nemmeno aspettare che er mondo faccia n'altro giro" he would tell you in one breath.
You kiss him delicately, "Allora non esitare, non aspettare che la luna fugga Mr.Nott"
"Ai suoi ordini Signora Nott"
"Ti amo tantissimo" the last thing he would tell you before finally letting himself completely go, completamente perso in questo amore, si che possa ammirare te, te sospirare e te amare, te soltanto.
—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—
Okay so here's the translation of the poem, the canzonetta, which as I said it's called "Meravigliosamente", in English “Wonderfully":
My ask box is open!✨🥂
<- part II
-> part III?
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theetherealbloom · 1 month
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BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM - CH.3
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Chapter 3: ​​Dutiful Daughter, All My Plans Were Laid
Summary: After harboring a crush on your dad's charming best friend, Joel Miller, you graduate college only to be confused by something he supposedly said to you, but then he and his daughter Sarah, reluctantly move away due to his work. Six months later, Joel returns to town, and you're desperate to confirm if his words were real. Both you and your dad eagerly await his arrival but for entirely different reasons. As feelings intensify, you realize that falling for him might not be temporary after all.
Paring: Dbf!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Angst, AGE-GAP Romance, Reader is Early twenties and Joel is in his late 30s to early 40s, Secret Romance, Sneaking Around, FLUFF, LOTS OF SMUT, SMUT, SMUT, Heavy Make Out Session, Oral Fem Receiving, Kissing, Barely any plot, NOT A SLOW BURN AT ALL, Relationship, Swearing, Depression, Anxiety, Crying, Suggestive content, Flirting, Flattery, Awkward, Virgin reader, inexperienced reader, slightly Self Deprecating, Suggestive Content, Size Kink, Reader is “smaller” than Joel but no further descriptions, Breeding Kink, PWP (wrap it up), Body worship, declaring their love for each other, 
Word Count: 10k
A/N: THERE ARE SO MANY OF YOU… UHM, HI! We’re nearing the end of the mini-series. I believe I have one or two more chapters to write and then we’ll have the epilogue. Thank you for all the comments, reblogs and likes! I look forward to reading all the feedback from ya’ll, it really does give me the motivation to write. Thank you all again!!! 🤍☺️
Side note: I’m dyslexic and English isn’t my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!
Song: But Daddy I Love Him by Taylor Swift
Previous Chapter → Next Chapter | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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As you lay there, wrapped in Joel's arms, you can't help but steal a glance at the small alarm clock on the nightstand. The glowing numbers tell you that it's nearly 3am, and as much as you don't want to leave the warmth of his bed and his embrace, you know that you can't stay forever.
Your dad is expecting you for breakfast in just a few hours, and the thought of him having a heart attack if you don't show up is enough to make you sit up and take notice.
"I don't wanna leave," you murmur, your voice barely above a whisper as you snuggle closer to Joel, inhaling the intoxicating scent of his skin.
"I don't wanna let you go," Joel replies, his accent thick and heavy as he tightens his arms around you, pulling you closer still.
You can feel the heat of his body, the strength of his muscles, and the warmth of his embrace, and you know that you could stay there forever, wrapped up in him.
But reality calls, and you know that you can't ignore it forever.
"I wish we could stay like this forever," you say, your voice filled with longing and sadness.
"Me too, darlin'," Joel replies, his voice filled with emotion. "But we both know that we can't."
You nod, your heart heavy with the weight of the decision you both know you have to make.
"I guess I should get going," you say, your voice barely above a whisper.
"I guess you should," Joel replies, his voice filled with regret.
As you reluctantly pull away from Joel, he surprises you by gently tugging you back into his embrace, his lips seeking yours in a kiss that is both passionate and intense. The taste of him lingers on your lips, a bittersweet reminder of the connection you share.
With a soft sigh, you finally gather the strength to untangle yourself from his arms, a pang of longing tugging at your heart as you begin to get dressed. Joel watches you, his gaze filled with a mix of desire and tenderness, his southern drawl adding a soothing cadence to his words.
"Let me help you, darlin'," Joel offers, his voice warm and comforting as he assists you with your clothes, his touch gentle yet possessive. The intimacy of the moment lingers in the air, a silent acknowledgment of the bond you share.
Once you're dressed, Joel's arms wrap around you, holding you close as if reluctant to let you go. His embrace is both clingy and sweet, a silent plea for you to stay a little longer, to prolong the inevitable parting.
"I wish you didn't have to go," Joel murmurs, his voice filled with longing. "I could hold you like this forever."
You lean into his embrace, savoring the warmth and security he provides. "I wish I could stay too, Joel," you whisper, your voice filled with emotion. "But I have to go."
As you prepare to leave, Joel's gaze lingers on you, his eyes filled with a mixture of love and regret. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, a silent promise of his affection and devotion.
"I'll be counting the minutes until I can see you again," Joel says, his voice filled with sincerity. "You mean everything to me, darlin'."
As you step out onto Joel's front porch, the cool night air brushes against your skin, a stark contrast to the warmth of his embrace. You take a deep breath, savoring the scent of the night, your heart heavy with the weight of your decision to leave.
You make your way quietly and quickly to the back of your house, tiptoeing through the darkness, your mind filled with thoughts of Joel and the intense connection you share. As you slip back into your bedroom, you can't help but feel a sense of bliss and excitement, knowing that you'll see Joel again in just a few short hours.
The anticipation builds within you, a simmering heat that courses through your veins, fueled by the memories of your time together. You can't wait to feel his touch again, to lose yourself in the passion and intensity of your connection.
As you lay in bed, your mind drifts to thoughts of Joel, his drawl echoing in your mind, his words of love and devotion filling your heart with warmth and joy. You know that what you have together is special, a bond that goes beyond mere physical attraction.
You close your eyes, drifting off to sleep with a smile on your face, your dreams filled with the promise of a future filled with passion and love.
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As the morning sunlight streams through your window, you wake up feeling refreshed and rejuvenated, the memories of the previous night still fresh in your mind. You can't wait to see Joel again, to feel his arms around you, to lose yourself in the intensity of your connection.
With a sense of excitement and anticipation, you get ready for the day, your heart filled with hope and joy, knowing that you have found something truly special in Joel.
You make your way downstairs to find your dad had gotten up extra early today. He glances at you and asks, "Well, someone's happy this morning. Did you sleep well honey?"
"Huh, what? Oh... yeah, I was pretty tired from yesterday so I just kinda passed out," you say, trying to be nonchalant. But you can see your dad give you a suspicious look before taking a long sip of his coffee.
"So... you and Joel..." Your dad begins, and you feel blood rushing into your ears, making you feel dizzy.
You raise your eyebrows at your dad, waiting for him to continue.
He clears his throat and says, "You gonna go with him to pick up Sarah later?"
You nod and smile at the mention of Sarah, "Mhm! I'll text you when we're leaving."
"Alright then, just..." Before your dad could finish that sentence, the doorbell rings, and you watch as your dad moves to the front door. When he opens it, Joel is standing there in a grey tee and those tight jeans with his hands in his pockets.
Your heart skips a beat as you take in the sight of him. "Fuck. He looks so good," you think to yourself, your body responding to his presence in a way that you can't control.
"Hey there, darlin'," Joel says, his deep Southern accent sending shivers down your spine.
"Hey," you reply, your voice barely above a whisper as you take in the sight of him standing on your doorstep.
Your dad has his eyes narrowed between the two of you, before saying, "Be sure to tell Sarah hi for me, I'll be going now."
You and Joel say goodbye, and watch as your dad hops into his car and drives off to work, leaving you alone with Joel.
"I missed you," Joel says, pulling you into a tight embrace.
You melt into his arms, feeling the warmth and strength of his body against yours.
"I missed you too," you reply, your voice filled with longing.
As you pull away, Joel's gaze lingers on you, his eyes filled with desire and affection.
"Let's go pick up Sarah," he says, his voice filled with excitement.
You nod, your heart racing with anticipation as you make your way to the car. The feeling of gratitude for the connection you share with Joel washes over you, knowing that it's something truly special and rare.
As you approach the car, Joel grabs the keys from your hand and gives your ass a playful smack, causing you to jolt in surprise.
"Hey!" you exclaim, looking at him with mock indignation.
Joel's smoldering gaze meets yours, filled with a mischievous glint that makes your heart race.
"Darlin', you just sit back and relax," he drawls in that deliciously Southern accent of his, sending a shiver down your spine. "I'm in charge of the driving, and you're in charge of lookin' like a damn goddess."
You can't help but smile at his playful banter, feeling your heart flutter with excitement as you slide into the passenger seat. Joel's eyes follow your every move, and you can't help but feel a little self-conscious under his intense gaze.
As he starts the car, you can't help but feel a sense of contentment and happiness wash over you. The connection you share with him is electric, a magnetic pull that draws you in and makes you feel alive.
With one hand on the steering wheel, Joel reaches out to place his other hand on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. You let out a soft moan, biting your lip as you feel a spark of desire ignite within you.
"You like that, don't you?" Joel murmurs, his voice low and husky. "You like when I touch you like this."
You nod, unable to find the words to respond. Joel's touch is intoxicating, making you feel dizzy with desire.
"Good," he says, his voice dripping with satisfaction. "Because I love touching you, feeling your body respond to my touch. You're mine, and I'm never letting you go."
You lean back in your seat, feeling a sense of contentment and happiness wash over you as Joel's words of love and affection fill your ears.
"So... darlin'... how'd you feel about tellin' Sarah about us?" Joel asks, his Southern accent sending shivers down your spine as he rubs his thumb gently on your thigh.
You play the thought through your mind, considering the implications of sharing your relationship with Sarah.
"You want her to know?" you ask, looking at him with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension.
Joel nods, his eyes filled with warmth and affection. "Of course, darlin'. Do you?"
You take a deep breath, thinking it over. "Will she be okay with it?"
Joel smiles, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "With you and I? Yeah. To be honest... I talk about you to her... a lot."
Your heart skips a beat at the thought of Joel sharing his feelings for you with Sarah. "Really?"
Joel nods, his thumb still tracing lazy circles on your thigh. "Yeah, darlin'. I can't help it. I'm crazy about you."
You can't help but smile at his words, feeling a sense of belonging and love that you've never experienced before.
"Okay," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "Let's tell her."
Joel's face lights up, his eyes shining with happiness. "Really?"
You nod, feeling a sense of excitement and anticipation wash over you. "Yeah. I want to share this with her. I want her to know how much you mean to me."
Joel leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to your hand. "Thank you, darlin'. I promise you won't regret it."
As you and Joel make your way to the parking lot of the airport, the anticipation of reuniting with Sarah and Tommy fills the air with excitement. The energy between you and Joel crackles with anticipation as you head towards the arrivals area, scanning the crowd for their familiar faces.
And then, there they are. Sarah and Tommy, standing out in the crowd like beacons of joy. You can't contain your excitement and start waving your arms wildly, practically bouncing up and down with anticipation.
Sarah's eyes light up as she spots you, and she breaks into a wide grin, her steps quickening as she rushes towards you and Joel. Tommy follows closely behind, a smile playing on his lips as he takes in the scene before him.
"Hey, you guys!" Sarah exclaims, throwing her arms around you in a tight hug, her excitement contagious.
Sarah then turns to Joel, her eyes sparkling with joy as she throws her arms around his neck, embracing him with her whole body.
"Hi dad," she says, her voice filled with warmth and affection.
Joel's face lights up at the sight of his daughter, and he wraps his arms around her, pulling her in for a tight hug.
"I missed you too, baby girl," he says, his voice filled with warmth and affection.
He presses a gentle kiss to her forehead, his love for her radiating off of him in waves.
You watch the exchange between Joel and Sarah, feeling a sense of warmth and happiness wash over you. The bond between father and daughter is something special, a testament to the love they share.
Your gaze shifts to Tommy, and you make your way over to him, a friendly smile on your face. You wrap your arms around him in a warm embrace, feeling the strength and warmth of his body against yours.
"Hey there, it's good to see you!" you exclaim, your voice filled with genuine warmth and affection.
Tommy returns your embrace, his arms tightening around you for a moment before releasing you.
"Hey, it's good to see you too!" he replies, his voice filled with genuine warmth.
You take a step back, your hands still resting on his shoulders. "So, how was the flight?" you ask, your curiosity piqued.
Tommy shrugs, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Oh, you know, the usual. Turbulence, crying babies, and the occasional snoring passenger."
You laugh, the sound rich and full. "Sounds like a blast," you say, your voice filled with sarcasm.
Tommy grins, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Oh, it was. Trust me."
As you all make your way to the car, the banter and teasing flow freely, the shared history and inside jokes adding to the sense of closeness between you.
Joel takes the lead, helping Tommy load his and Sarah's suitcases into the trunk of your car. His strong arms lift the heavy bags with ease, his movements fluid and efficient.
Sarah watches him with a proud smile on her face, her eyes filled with admiration and love.
"Hey dad, can I sit up front with you?" she asks, her voice filled with excitement and hope.
Joel shakes his head, a gentle smile on his face. "Sorry, baby girl. It wouldn't be polite to do that since it's not my car."
Sarah pouts, her bottom lip sticking out in disappointment. "But I want to sit up front with you!"
Joel ruffles her hair affectionately. "I know, but we have to be polite. Maybe next time, okay?"
Sarah nods, her disappointment forgotten as quickly as it appeared. She climbs into the back seat, her eyes sparkling with excitement and joy.
Tommy follows suit, his movements easy and relaxed. He slides into the back seat next to Sarah, a friendly smile on his face.
As you all settle into your seats, the car is filled with laughter and chatter, the shared excitement of the journey ahead palpable in the air.
As Joel navigates the car out of the airport and onto the road leading back to his house, a sense of contentment washes over you. The familiar sights pass by outside the windows, the hum of the engine providing a soothing backdrop to the lively conversation inside.
You feel Joel's hand on your upper thigh, his touch warm and reassuring, a silent declaration of his affection for you. Your heart flutters at the intimate gesture, and you steal a glance at him, meeting his gaze with a shy smile.
In the rearview mirror, you catch Tommy raising his eyebrows playfully, a knowing look in his eyes. Sarah, oblivious to the silent exchange, gazes out the window, her expression one of wonder and excitement.
The dynamic in the car is one of comfort and familiarity, each person bringing their own energy to the mix. Joel's presence is a steady anchor, his touch a source of comfort and reassurance. Tommy's playful teasing adds a lightness to the atmosphere, while Sarah's infectious enthusiasm fills the space with joy.
Eventually, you arrive back at Joel's house, the journey from the airport filled with laughter and chatter. As you all step out of the car, you lend a hand to Joel and Tommy, helping them with the suitcases and other items as you all make your way into the house.
Tommy excuses himself to put away his things in the guestroom, while Sarah does the same in her new room. You take the opportunity to help Joel fix up a few snacks for Tommy and Sarah, the two of you working together with ease and familiarity.
As you put the finishing touches on the snacks, you feel Joel's arms wrap around your waist, pulling you close. His lips find your neck, peppering kisses along the sensitive skin as he inhales your scent.
You lean back into his embrace, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. The connection between you two is intense, a magnetic pull that draws you closer together.
As Tommy makes his way back into the living room, Joel releases you, a playful smile on his face.
"I see you two found each other," Tommy says with a wink, a teasing glint in his eye.
You feel your face heat up, but Joel just chuckles, his arm draped around your shoulders.
"Can't help it," Joel says with a shrug, his gaze lingering on you for a moment before turning back to Tommy.
Tommy raises an eyebrow, a teasing glint in his eye. "You gonna tell Sarah?" he asks, grabbing a potato chip from the ceramic bowl on the counter.
Joel nods, a small smile playing on his lips. "Yeah, when she gets down here," he says, his voice filled with warmth and affection.
Just then, Sarah appears from around the corner, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "I knew it! Finally! He's been talking about you non-stop and was an absolute grump for the past few months!" she exclaims, a wide grin spreading across her face.
You feel your cheeks flush at the mention of Joel's infatuation with you, but Sarah's excitement is infectious.
Joel chuckles, his arm draped around your shoulders. "I guess the cat's out of the bag now," he says, his gaze softening as he looks at you.
Sarah claps her hands together, her eyes shining with joy. "I'm so happy for you two!" she exclaims, pulling you into a tight hug.
Tommy joins in, a warm smile on his face. "Welcome to the family," he says, his voice filled with genuine warmth.
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You quickly send a message to your dad, updating him on your whereabouts and letting him know that you'll be having dinner with the Millers, and that he's welcome to join you all.
The rest of the evening is filled with laughter and conversation, the four of you sharing stories and memories as you get to know each other better.
As you were nearing finishing dinner, you hear a knock on Joel's front door, and he excuses himself to answer it. You continue to laugh loudly at Sarah's jokes while Tommy rolls his eyes playfully.
But then, you hear a familiar voice call out your name, and you find your dad standing by the entryway of the dining area. The room falls silent as all eyes turn to him.
"Hey Dad... we just had dinner. Do you want anything? I'm sure I can fix you up a plate," you say, standing up to greet him.
Your dad shakes his head. "No, just had dinner with some of the guys back at the shop. I wanted to say hi to Sarah and Tommy. Didn't think you'd still be here... thought you'd be home already," he says, giving you and Joel a pointed look.
Sarah, bless her heart, quickly jumps in to save the day. "Oh! That's my fault. I insisted she stay here for dinner since I missed her so much," she says, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
Your dad chuckles, his gaze softening as he looks at you. "Well, I'm glad you're having a good time. I'll let you all get back to it, just don’t be home too late," he says, giving you a quick hug before turning to leave.
As the door closes behind your dad, a sense of calm settles over the room. You all let out a collective sigh of relief, the tension dissipating as you begin to help clear the table and clean up the dishes. You insist that Sarah and Tommy take a break and get some rest after the meal.
Just as you're elbow-deep in soapy water, scrubbing at a stubborn spot on a plate, you feel Joel's presence behind you. His strong arms wrap around your waist, pulling you gently away from the sink.
"I'll wash 'em, darlin'," he says, his voice soft and reassuring. "You can rest too. You've done so much already. I can take it from here."
You turn to face him, a grateful smile on your lips. "Are you sure? I don't mind helping," you say, your voice filled with appreciation for his thoughtfulness.
Joel's gaze meets yours, his eyes warm and filled with affection. "I'm sure. You've been a big help today. Let me take care of this," he says, his drawl adding a soothing cadence to his words.
"I'll help dry the dishes and put them away," you say, grabbing a towel from the drawer next to the sink.
Joel chuckles, his arms wrapping around your waist as he presses a gentle kiss to the side of your head. "Fine, darlin'," he says with a wink.
You bump your hip with his, a playful grin on your face. "Come on, slowpoke. Let's get these dishes done," you say, sticking your tongue out at him teasingly.
Joel laughs, the sound deep and rich. "Alright, alright. Let's get to work," he says, his arms still wrapped around you as you begin to dry the dishes together.
The warmth of Joel's body against yours, the sound of his laughter, and the easy banter between you creates a sense of comfort and familiarity that you cherish.
As you work together, the pile of dishes slowly dwindles, the kitchen gradually returning to its former state of cleanliness.
Finally, the last dish is dried and put away, and you turn to face Joel, a satisfied smile on your lips. "See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" you say, your voice filled with playful teasing.
Joel grins, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "No, darlin', it wasn't. But I think I'll let you do the dishes next time," he says, his arms still wrapped around you.
You laugh, the sound rich and full. "We'll see about that," you say, your voice filled with playful challenge.
You and Joel make your way back to the living room, the sound of laughter and chatter filling the air. Tommy and Sarah are settled on the couch, their attention focused on the TV as they watch some show they had found.
Sarah turns her head, her eyes sparkling with curiosity as she tilts it at the two of you. "So... when are you gonna tell your dad?" she asks, her voice filled with playful teasing.
You glance at Joel, a mixture of emotions swirling in your chest. "I'm not sure... but hopefully... soon," you say, your voice filled with uncertainty.
Joel nods, his arm draped around your shoulders as he pulls you closer. "Yeah, we'll tell him when the time is right," he says, his voice filled with confidence and reassurance.
Tommy turns his head, a knowing look in his eyes as he takes in the exchange between you and Joel. "Well, whenever you're ready, we'll be here to support you," he says, his voice filled with warmth and affection.
Sarah nods, her eyes shining with excitement. "Yeah, we can't wait to see what the future holds for you two," she says, her voice filled with genuine happiness.
The room falls silent for a moment, the weight of the conversation settling over you all. But then, the sound of laughter and chatter fills the air once again, the tension dissipating as you all settle in to enjoy the rest of the evening together.
As you lean into Joel's embrace, his arm wrapped around you, you can't help but feel a sense of contentment wash over you. 
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"I had a lot of fun today," you say softly as Joel walks you back home, the short distance feeling longer with each step as a mix of excitement and nervousness swirls within you.
Joel's hands are tucked away in his jeans, a subtle restraint evident as he refrains from intertwining his fingers with yours, a silent acknowledgment of the need for caution in the presence of your father.
He hums in agreement, a small smile playing on his lips. "I did too," he replies, his voice warm and filled with affection.
You glance up at him, a hint of longing in your eyes. "Wish I could stay over tonight, but y'know... my dad," you sigh, the reality of the situation sinking in as you step onto the familiar steps of your front porch.
Joel nods, understanding the unspoken boundaries that need to be respected. "I get it. We'll have plenty of time for that," he says, his gaze lingering on you with a mix of desire and restraint.
You smile, your heart filled with gratitude. "Yeah, definitely. Thanks for walking me home," you say, your voice soft and sincere.
Joel leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "Anytime, darlin'," he murmurs, his deep baritone sending a shiver down your spine. "I've been meanin' to ask you... d'you mind comin' with me to grab a bite to eat and then head to the store to pick up a few more things for the house tomorrow?"
You nod, a smile spreading across your face. "Of course," you reply, your voice filled with eagerness. But then you remember, “You know what small towns are like. People talk.”
“I can’t guarantee anything,” Joel admits. “But we can only do our best to keep our hands off each other until it’s the right time to have everyone know. If you think that’s for the best,” he susgests, and only try to make you feel better.
You let out a small sigh and eventually nod and give him a small smile in agreement.
Joel's eyes sparkle with affection. "I'll see you soon, darlin'," he says, sweet as whiskey.
As you watch Joel's retreating figure, a smile tugs at the corners of your lips, a silent acknowledgment of the warmth and affection that fills your heart. Reluctantly, you turn and head back towards your house, the day's events still lingering in your mind.
The familiar surroundings of your home envelope you, the sound of the television filtering in from the living room. You pause in the entryway, taking a moment to gather your thoughts before making your way towards the comforting glow of the screen.
"Hey, Dad," you call out, your voice filled with a mix of nervousness and excitement.
Your father looks up from the television, a warm smile spreading across his face. "Hey, kiddo. How was your day?" he asks, his eyes filled with genuine interest.
"It was good," you reply, trying to sound casual. "I'm going with Joel tomorrow to help him pick up some stuff for his house."
Your father raises his eyebrows, a hint of a knowing smile playing on his lips. "Oh, alright. Sarah and Tommy coming too?"
You shake your head, feeling a slight flutter in your stomach. "I don't think so... I think they wanna fix their things and rest up a bit."
Your father nods, his gaze studying you for a moment, a hint of a knowing smile playing on his lips. "Just the two of you, huh?" he says, his voice laced with slight concern.
You feel your cheeks flush, but you hold your father's gaze, determined to be honest. "Yeah, just the two of us," you confirm, your voice soft but steady.
Your father leans back in his chair, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Alright," he says, his voice calm and reassuring. "Just text me when you leave, okay?"
You nod, a grateful smile spreading across your face. "Thanks, Dad," you say, your voice filled with appreciation.
You feel a warmth spread through your chest, the weight of the day's events finally starting to catch up with you. "I'm gonna head to bed," you say, stifling a yawn. "I'm kinda exhausted."
Your father chuckles, the sound warm and familiar. "Get some rest, kiddo. You've got a big day ahead of you tomorrow," he says.
You nod, leaning in to give your father a quick hug. "Thanks, Dad. I love you," you murmur, your voice filled with emotion.
"Love you too, kiddo," he replies, his arms tightening around you for a moment before you pull away.
You tuck yourself into the cozy comfort of your bed, a big smile spreading across your face as you let out a contented sigh. 
As you settle into the familiar softness of your pillows, your mind can't help but wander to Joel. The thought of spending the day with him tomorrow fills you with a sense of giddiness and anticipation that you can't quite contain.
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You hum a soft, lilting melody to yourself as you move through your morning routine, the excitement for the day ahead bubbling within you. The sound of your father stirring in the kitchen reaches your ears, and you know he's likely headed out for an early shift at the shop.
After quickly whipping up a simple breakfast, you hear a familiar knock at the front door, and you can't help the grin that spreads across your face as you practically bound towards it.
Pulling the door open, your eyes are immediately drawn to the sight of Joel standing there, his tall frame leaning casually against the doorframe. His silver curls are neatly pushed back, and he's dressed in a different colored flannel than the one he wore the day before, paired with his well-worn jeans.
A smirk plays on his lips as he takes in the sight of you, his eyes sparkling with a mix of affection and mischief.
"Mornin', darlin'," he drawls, his deep voice sending a shiver down your spine.
"Hi," you breathe, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious, yet unable to tear your gaze away from him.
Joel chuckles, the sound low and rich. "You ready to head out?" he asks, his arm reaching out to gently brush against yours.
You nod, your heart fluttering at his touch. "Just let me grab my bag," you say, turning to retrieve it from the nearby table.
As you turn back to face him, you catch a glimpse of your father in the kitchen, offering you a warm smile and a subtle nod of approval. The gesture fills you with a sense of comfort and reassurance.
Turning your attention back to Joel, you can't help but feel a surge of excitement and anticipation. "Okay, I'm all set," you say, your voice brimming with enthusiasm.
Joel grins, his hand finding the small of your back as he guides you out the door. "Then let's get goin', darlin'," he says, his touch sending a thrill through you.
As you step out into the crisp morning air, hand in hand with the man you've come to care for so deeply, a sense of anticipation and uncertainty lingers between you.
"What are we gonna do, Joel?" you ask suddenly as you settle into the car's passenger seat, the weight of the situation pressing down on you.
To be honest, it's the last thing Joel is thinking about, and your question catches him off guard. But he can see and feel how it's affecting you, the worry and doubt etched in your expression.
"You could just sneak over to my house every night. Make sure you're back home in time for breakfast," Joel suggests, trying to lighten the mood, but he knows deep down it's not as simple as that.
"Do you think your dad might already kinda know?" he asks, his voice soft and filled with concern. "Deep down, I kinda mean, darlin'."
You shrug, a mix of emotions swirling within you as Joel drives. You feel annoyed at yourself for even bringing it up, but Joel is grateful that you did.
"Or we could just go. Take off," Joel says, thinking aloud. He feels you turn to look at him, his hand still rubbing comforting circles on your thigh.
"You mean... just leave?" you ask, the idea not entirely foreign to you.
"It's not something we have to think about right this minute, but do you really wanna stay here, in this house? In this town, tutoring kids for a few bucks an hour?" Joel questions, his voice tinged with a hint of restlessness.
He remembers one of the main things he doesn't miss about small towns – how everyone seems to know everyone else's business. And in the case of you and Joel, that would be none of their damned business.
"But you only just bought the place, and Sarah and Tommy just arrived, and I guess the only thing I'm really worried about is Dad. Screw tutoring," you say, your brow furrowed as you grapple with the weight of the decisions ahead.
"I only bought the place... only came back to town to be closer to you, remember?" Joel explains, his voice filled with sincerity. "Sarah's school transfer papers haven't been processed yet, and Tommy has to go back anyways. I didn't think in my wildest dreams that I'd have you all to myself on day one, darlin'."
"You're a pretty fast operator, that's for sure," you tease him, a hint of a smile playing on your lips, but the underlying tension remains unresolved between you.
The realization that you are well and truly Joel's, the depth of your connection with him, fills you with a sense of contentment and joy. It's a problem, but the best kind of problem to have, a testament to the love and bond you share.
Unbeknownst to you, Joel hasn't checked his messages yet, but he's confident that the call he made to boost your dad's business will yield positive results. It may not all happen today, but he's hopeful it will help your dad regain his confidence and pride in his work.
In the meantime, Joel is adamant that you shouldn't do anything you're not comfortable with. He inquires if you're the only tutor available at the college.
"Of course not," you sigh, a hint of resignation in your voice. "It'll just mean a couple of college kids keep their tutoring money from Mom or Dad, is all," you reflect, the weight of the situation settling on your shoulders.
From your perspective, the real challenge lies in explaining to everyone that you've been with Joel the whole time. The thought of facing your father's reaction weighs heavily on your mind, and Joel is keenly aware of the potential conflict that may arise.
He knows that your father's protective instincts will be triggered, and navigating that aspect of your relationship will require patience and understanding from both of you.
"Well, if we're gonna burn for it, we may as well burn together," Joel tells you, his voice filled with a mix of determination and tenderness.
"But there's no point makin' it harder on ourselves either," Joel adds, his tone thoughtful. "Let's just wait and see, huh?" he suggests, his eyes meeting yours with a reassuring gaze.
The idea sinks in – it isn't the end of the world if you stop tutoring, and if nobody has caught on to the fact that you two are together, why stir up unnecessary trouble?
Relieved when you agree, you relax back into your seat, the weight of the situation lifting slightly. Joel parks the car on a street lined with small stores and cafes, the hustle and bustle of the town adding to the charm of the moment.
Despite the external distractions, it feels wrong to be near you and not show you how much you mean to him. The subtle touches and stolen glances have evolved into something deeper, a connection that demands to be acknowledged.
By the time you graduate from those fleeting moments to a full-blown kiss once you're back in the car after your meal, the intensity of your feelings for each other becomes undeniable.
Just as the moment seems to crystallize into something special, a female voice interrupts, shattering the private bubble you and Joel had created.
"Oh! Hi, Professor," you squeak, the sudden intrusion jolting you out of the intimate moment.
Joel, his expression darkening, turns to face the unexpected visitor, a protective instinct rising within him as he assesses the situation with a keen eye.
As the scene unfolds, Joel quickly grasps the situation at hand. A mildly annoyed college professor, Professor Hannah Bennett, catches her star tutor – you – in the arms of a man, instead of where you're expected to be.
The initial tension softens as Professor Bennett's gaze meets Joel's, her expression shifting from annoyance to curiosity. Joel, ever the gentleman, gulps slightly before extending his hand in introduction.
"Professor Hannah Bennett," she says, regaining her composure, though Joel feels her hand limp in his for a brief moment, a sign of her surprise.
Her eyes flicker from Joel to you, who has momentarily lost your voice in the unexpected encounter. The professor, quick to regain her professional demeanor, decides to leave you two to your own devices.
"Your dad mentioned you were helping his friend... uh, new neighbor," she stammers, a deep blush coloring her cheeks.
"Just maybe more notice next time if you're not up for tutoring for the day, that's all I ask," she adds, her tone taking on a more authoritative air as she reverts to her professorial role.
"I think I'll take a rain check on tutoring for a while, Professor Bennett," you declare in a clear, resolute voice, your hand slipping into Joel's for support.
Joel's pride and satisfaction are evident as he grins at your decision. The old professor huffs in disapproval, muttering something about the younger generation, before swiftly retreating from the scene.
"You quit?" Joel asks, his eyes filled with a mix of amusement and admiration, leaning in to kiss you deeply before you can respond.
"I guess I did," you reply, a hint of amazement in your tone at the sudden turn of events.
"Was it hard?" Joel teases, and you shoot him a sidelong glance, a hint of amusement in your eyes.
"The professor's the soul of discretion," you assure him. "But if we're caught like that on our first time out together..."
Joel knows exactly what you mean. The potential fallout from such a public display is looming, and he can feel the weight of it pressing down on you both.
"C'mon," Joel urges, determined to enjoy the moment despite the impending challenges. "Show me around town. Take me grocery shopping," he suggests, his voice filled with enthusiasm.
"We can fill up both our pantries and maybe we can cook up a storm for dinner?" he asks, but he can see the worry etched on your face.
"Hey, your dad was alright with the idea, right? To come with me for the grocery run?" Joel reasons, hoping to ease your concerns.
Relieved when you finally yield, a smile spreading across your face as you relax. "You're right. He did," you agree.
"But easy with those kisses," you're quick to add, a hint of playfulness in your tone. "What if it was Dad that happened by just now?"
Joel bites his tongue, and to keep you happy, he agrees to the new terms and conditions. No aggressive public displays of affection – a small price to pay to maintain the delicate balance of your relationship.
Your little run-in with the professor has only affirmed Joel's feeling that small-town eyes and ears are always connected to big mouths. He knows they'll have to be cautious, at least for now.
"Say," Joel asks once you're back in the car, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Is there like a lingerie store or something in town too?"
You raise an eyebrow, unsure if he's teasing you or not. "I think there is, but I don't think that's where you wanna be seen hanging out, is it?" you ask, a playful challenge in your voice.
Joel chuckles, his gaze focused on the road ahead. "I'll keep it in mind for future reference," he explains, a hint of a smile playing on his lips.
As he navigates the quiet streets, Joel makes a mental note that you're going to need a ready supply of all things underwear. The memory of tearing yours off is still fresh enough in his mind to remind him that he wants to make it a regular occurrence.
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As you and Joel make your way through the quiet streets of the town, you can't help but feel a growing sense of unease. It must be your imagination, you tell yourself, trying to push down the nagging feeling that something is off.
But as you step into the local grocery store, the truth becomes undeniable – everyone is staring at the two of you. You're nowhere near touching, and you definitely don't have a sign around your neck proclaiming your newfound intimacy, but the curious gazes and hushed whispers are impossible to ignore.
You keep forgetting that a man of Joel's stature and presence is bound to turn heads in a small town like this. But as quick as the locals are to stare and gawk, they're just as fast to look away, especially when they lock eyes with Joel's unwavering gaze.
"Grab whatever you need, whatever you want. For your place, too, darlin'," Joel says, his voice warm and reassuring, though you can see the strain in his expression, the desire to reach out and touch you palpable.
He focuses his attention on filling the biggest cart he can find, his movements efficient and purposeful. You can't help but wonder how you're going to explain a houseful of food to your father, but you're sure he's well aware of just how naturally generous Joel is by now.
After filling up not one, but two overflowing carts, you can't help but protest the sheer volume of groceries Joel has insisted on purchasing. But he's quick to reason with you, his voice low and conspiratorial.
"The less I have to go out to shop, the more time I have to work on my new house," he says, his words laced with a hidden meaning that's clear to you.
You nod in understanding, realizing that his reasoning is not just about efficiency, but also about maintaining the appearance of propriety in the eyes of the small-town community.
As you check out, the total on the receipt makes your eyes widen, but Joel simply shrugs it off, his focus on ensuring you and your home are well-stocked. You actually think it's a great idea – if you both stock up now, you won't have to venture out for anything later.
No tutoring, no errands to run, at least for the next week. The thought of having all that spare time with Joel has your heart racing with anticipation, and you're pretty sure he has a few ideas of his own.
But as Joel pulls into your street, your breath catches in your throat. There, parked out front, is your father's truck. You swallow hard, the weight of the situation suddenly pressing down on you.
"Your dad's home," Joel says, his voice strained, but there's no hint of worry in his tone. If anything, he sounds more like an animal guarding its prized possession than someone afraid of getting caught.
Taking a deep breath as Joel pulls into the driveway, you brace yourself for the moment of confrontation you've been dreading. But as you both start to unload the groceries, the anticipated showdown never materializes.
Far from it, your dad practically leaps out of the house, a huge smile spreading across his face as he welcomes you both. Joel's mood instantly shifts, a sense of relief and contentment washing over him – if your dad is happy, so is Joel.
And just like that, you're off the hook for now.
"You're home early, Dad," you observe, but he's way too pumped up about something else to ask you two where you've been. He's grinning like a maniac, and you can't help but wonder if he's finally cracked.
Catching Joel's knowing look, you realize that this must be good news somehow. Whatever it is, it's clearly put your father in an exceptionally cheerful mood.
"I dunno what you did, Joel, but it worked!" your dad almost shrieks, pumping the air with his fist before high-fiving Joel, who doesn't seem surprised at all.
"What did you do?" you ask them both, but it's as if you've disappeared or something. Your dad has gone into full Joel-best-buddy mode, slapping his back and whooping and hollering. It's not until you're all inside that you can finally get any sense out of him.
"I'm booked solid for the next three months!" your dad exclaims to Joel, who's trying his best to look excited for your father's good fortune.
"And that, uh, client of yours? The one who collects all those vintage cars? Guess who he wants to be maintaining them all?" your dad asks, his eyes sparkling with excitement.
"That's great news. I'm glad I could..." Joel begins, but your dad is on a roll.
He's re-hiring the mechanics and workers he's laid off, and he's going to "expand the business." He's going to do better than ever from now on.
He's going to...
He's going to make you vomit if he keeps going on about it.
"Dad," you finally say, talking over him to get his attention.
"Yeah, sweetie, what is it?" he asks, holding his thought so he can keep telling Joel all about his fresh business plans.
"Nothing." You smile. "But are you gonna stick around, or do you still have that tractor to fix?" you ask, wondering if you and Joel will have any time alone now.
And you haven't even thought about what's going to happen when it's time to go to bed.
"Oh, yeah. Thanks, honey, but I've got Lucas going out to do it now. Boy! Is he glad to have his old job back!" your dad exclaims loudly, beaming up at Joel.
His admiration for Joel makes you feel like you're not the only one who thinks he's pretty amazing, which he is to a lot of people. But to you, he's the only one.
"You've done the hunting and gathering," your dad proclaims, his eyes sweeping over the abundance of meat and groceries you and Joel have just started to unload. Sarah and Tommy quickly make their way outside, greeting your father and offering to help with the remaining items that belong to them.
"So I'll start making us all a feast to celebrate," your dad announces, asking you if you can finish bringing in the groceries while he and Joel "catch up."
The subtle way he singles you out of the conversation is not lost on you. If this had been a day or two ago, before you had just lived through the best twenty-four hours of your life with Joel, you wouldn't have minded. But you hadn't counted on your dad being home early, nor did you expect him to hijack your man as soon as he saw him again.
You look to Joel for help, but he only shrugs, a strange expression crossing his face when your dad's back is turned that has you stifling a giggle. Instantly, you find yourself forgiving the entire group for being in this crazy situation.
You do as your dad asks, leaving out the items he calls for, the ones he'll need to amaze you all with his cooking skills. But once that task is complete, you're left awkwardly hanging out in the kitchen, feeling miles away from Joel. Maybe you should just go to your room.
No sooner do you glance towards the hallway leading to your bedroom, Joel's stern look stops you in your tracks. The message is clear – he wants you right where he can see you.
"I might just go change," you tell the room, knowing your dad is not paying attention, still talking a million miles a minute to Joel, who gives a little nod of approval.
You haven't seen your dad this excited, ever. Whatever Joel did has clearly done the trick to help your dad out, but are you really going to have to hear about it all night? It feels like you are.
By the time you change clothes, trying to look nice but not overly dressy for Joel, your dad stops long enough to notice you for a change.
"Sorry, honey. I've just been so pumped all day. And I've just gotta talk to the man who made it all happen," he explains, shooting Joel another glowing look.
"Don't let me do all the talking, though, and don't worry about skipping tutoring today. I already spoke to the professor," he adds, making your heart freeze in your chest.
"So? What have you two been up to all day?" he asks, snapping off a celery stalk from one of the brown paper sacks, crunching it loudly as he leans back against the counter.
Now, he's all ears, eager to know what it is that you and Joel have been up to.
He looks from you to Joel, and you can feel your mouth hanging open. You're waiting for Joel to save you both, which he does without effort.
"I had sweet darlin’ here help me run some errands, we did some grocery shopping, and then she showed me around town," he says, and none of it is a lie.
Your dad's brow creases with attention as he listens, already looking bored if he can't keep talking about his own good news. Joel does skip some parts, though, including the more intimate moments you shared – your father wouldn't be interested in those details.
But once Joel suggests you help him out like you did today more often, especially with all the plans Joel has for his new house, and hanging out with Sarah and helping her by tutoring her, it starts to sound more like a job offer than anything else.
"Well, it's up to you, hon," your dad says thoughtfully after a moment, not even a hint of suspicion in his voice anymore.
As your dad busies himself selecting ingredients for the meal he's going to prepare, you can't help but feel a mix of emotions swirling within you. The prospect of spending more hours talking and eating with your family and Joel looms ahead, a bittersweet reminder of the newfound dynamics in your life.
Joel's pivotal role in saving your dad's business is evident, and it's clear that your father is more than willing to follow Joel's lead from now on. Despite the relief and gratitude you feel, there's an underlying longing for the quiet moments alone with the man who has quickly become the center of your world.
"I wasn't getting paid very much to tutor, Dad," you remind him, shooting a playful glance at Joel when your dad's attention is elsewhere. You can't help but ponder what your hourly rate might be if you were to accept his unofficial job offer, a hint of mischief dancing in your eyes.
It takes some time to adjust to the new dynamic in the kitchen with Joel and your dad. You find yourself fighting the urge to seek out Joel's touch every few seconds, a silent reminder of the growing connection between you.
As you call Sarah and Tommy over for dinner, the atmosphere shifts to one of camaraderie and relaxation. It feels good to simply talk, eat, and goof around without the weight of other concerns pressing down on you.
Throughout the evening, you notice the subtle strain on Joel's face, a reminder of the complexities of the situation. Yet, your dad remains your dad, unwavering in his friendship with Joel, creating a unique bond between the three of you.
As the meal progresses and conversations flow, you find yourself washing up alongside Sarah, the men engrossed in their post-dinner discussions out on the porch. Sarah decides to head back to the house early, leaving you with a sense of peace and contentment in the quiet moments that follow.
The realization hits you like a ton of bricks – you might have to spend the night away from Joel, not just tonight, but potentially every night until you both figure out what to do. It's not a happy thought, and you know Joel is thinking the same thing as the time for bed draws closer.
You've spent more hours today not touching and kissing than you two have actually been able to do so, and you just know Joel isn't happy about that either. So when your dad comes back inside without Joel or Tommy, you try not to sound panicked as you ask where they both are.
Your dad chuckles, "He went home, sweetie. He lives next door now, remember?" he asks, stifling a yawn and scratching his belly, letting you know he's about to turn in.
"I gotta huge day tomorrow, so I might not even see ya before or after work, but thanks for helping Joel out. He's really saved our bacon," your dad says, pecking your cheek before stretching out another yawn and heading to his room.
Not long after hearing his door close, there's a light rapping at the back door. You spring around and see Joel, his finger pressed firmly to his lips before he stalks over to you in two steps, kissing you with a desperation that takes your breath away.
"Wait 'til he's asleep again... Then come over," he murmurs, cocking his head and darting back out the door before your dad shuffles down the hall again, this time in his pajamas on the way to the bathroom.
Once your dad goes back to his room, you know he won't be coming out again. And if he does, he'll think you're asleep. So, tidying up the rest of the kitchen in record time, it isn't long before you hear your dad blowing bubbles in his sleep, and you're hot-footing it next door.
The need for Joel's touch is overwhelming, the hours spent apart feeling like an eternity. As you step into his home, the familiar scent of him envelops you, and you can't help but feel a sense of relief and excitement wash over you.
Without a moment's hesitation, you find yourself in his arms, your lips crashing against his in a desperate, passionate kiss. The world around you fades away, and all that matters is the connection you share, the hunger for each other's embrace.
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Joel's deep, southern drawl sends a shiver down your spine as he leans in, his lips brushing against your neck. "You gotta be quiet for me, darlin'," he murmurs, his warm breath caressing your skin. "Can you do that for me?"
You nod eagerly, your heart racing with anticipation. The need for his touch is overwhelming, the hours spent apart feeling like an eternity. As his strong arms wrap around you, pulling you flush against his muscular frame, you melt into his embrace.
Joel's calloused hands roam your body, igniting a fire within you that threatens to consume you. His lips crash against yours in a desperate, passionate kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth with a primal hunger. You whimper softly, the sound muffled by his searing kiss.
"That's it, darlin'," Joel growls, his voice dripping with desire. "Let me hear how much you want me." His hands slide down to your hips, gripping them firmly as he grinds his hardness against you.
You gasp, the sensation sending a jolt of pleasure through your core. "Joel," you breathe, your fingers tangling in his silver curls. "I need you, please..."
He chuckles, the deep rumble vibrating against your skin. "I know, sweetheart. I'm gonna take care of you." Deftly, he lifts you, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as he carries you towards the bedroom.
The world around you fades away, consumed by the raw, primal need that pulses between you. Joel lays you down on the bed, his calloused hands caressing your curves as he hovers over you, his eyes dark with lust.
"You're so damn beautiful, darlin'," he murmurs, his lips trailing featherlight kisses along your jaw. "I've been waitin' all day to have you like this."
You arch into his touch, a soft moan escaping your lips. "Then take me, Joel," you whisper, your voice dripping with desire. "I'm yours."
With a growl, Joel captures your lips in a searing kiss, his hands roaming your body as he slowly, methodically undresses you. The air is thick with the scent of your arousal, and the sound of your ragged breathing fills the room.
As he buries himself deep within you, you cry out, the sensation of being so completely filled sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body. Joel stills for a moment, his forehead pressed against yours.
"That's it, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice strained with restraint. "Let me hear how much you love it."
You whimper, your hips rolling against his. "Joel, please," you beg, your nails digging into the taut muscles of his back. "Don't stop."
With a groan, Joel begins to move, his thrusts slow and deliberate, driving you higher and higher towards the precipice of ecstasy. Your bodies move in perfect harmony, the world around you fading away until all that exists is the two of you, lost in a haze of passion and desire.
The room is filled with the sounds of your shared pleasure, the heady scent of sex hanging in the air as Joel's movements become more urgent, more primal. Your bodies move as one, a symphony of desire and need as you reach the pinnacle of ecstasy together, the intensity of your release washing over you in a wave of pure bliss.
As you come down from the heights of pleasure, Joel holds you close, his heart pounding against yours as you both catch your breath. In the aftermath of your passion, you're left feeling sated, fulfilled, and more connected to Joel than ever before.
In this stolen moment, you know that no matter the challenges that lie ahead, as long as you have Joel by your side, you're equipped to confront almost anything. The future may be uncertain, but in his arms, you've never felt more at home.
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trupowieszcz-moved · 2 years
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have you ever wondered what people ate in 17th century poland? me neither, but my dad has and since he's a historical reenactor and has reenactor friends, they managed to dig out a cooking book from the period, called Compendium Ferculorum.
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this book contains possibly the weirdest recipe i have ever fucking seen, enigmatically called "dish with pancakes", to lull you into a false sense of security. the weirdest thing about it is that it actually tastes really good, and not at all like you would imagine when you initially hear what goes into it.
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i understand most of you aren't able to read 17th century polish in a gothic font, so here's the direct transcription:
LXXVI. Potráwá z Naleśnikami Weźmiy Kapłona álbo Cielęćiny, álbo Báránka, porąb, wymocz, ociągniy, odbierz, poley Rosołem, ułoż másłá, pietruszki, soli, warż, á gdy dowiera, wley rosołu, wley Octu winnego, Cukru, pieprzu, Szafránu, Cynamonu, przywarz. Zrob Naleśniki, w materią wsyp trochę Száfranu y Cukru, uwarz Ryżu albo Jaieśnicę usmasz, wsyp Száfranu, Rożenkow drybnych, zawiiay tę máteryą w Naleśniki, w ktorą y Cukru przydasz, zrob z Jáiec máteryą, to iest: rozbiy Jáiec, maczay końce tych Naleśnikow w Jáycách rozbitych, puszczay ná gorące másło, a gdy odrętwiesz, daway te potráwę, a Naleśniki ná wierzch kładź, a zalewáiąc day ciepło.
which, loosely "translated" to modern polish, would be:
76. Potrawa z naleśnikami Weź kurczaka, cielęcinę lub baranka, poćwiartuj, wymocz, oskóruj, odbierz [to nie wiem co mogło oznaczać niestety], zalej rosołem, dołóż masła, pietruszki i soli, gotuj, a gdy zawrze, wlej resztę rosołu, ocet winny, cukier, pieprz, szafran i cynamon, gotuj dalej. Zrób naleśniki, do ciasta dosyp trochę szafranu i cukru, ugotuj ryż lub usmaż jajecznicę, wsyp szafran, drobne rodzynki i zawiń to nadzienie w naleśniki; w rozbełtanych jajkach z dodatkiem cukru zamocz końce naleśników i podsmaż na maśle, a gdy jajko się zetnie, podawaj potrawę z naleśnikami na górze, zalanymi gorącą zupą.
and in english:
76. Pancake dish Take a chicken, veal or lamb, quarter it, soak it, skin it, pick it up [this I don't know what it could mean unfortunately], pour broth over it, add butter, parsley and salt, cook it, and when it boils, pour in the rest of the broth, wine vinegar, sugar, black pepper, saffron and cinnamon, continue cooking. Make pancakes, add a little saffron and sugar to the batter, cook rice or scrambled eggs, add saffron, small raisins and wrap this filling in the pancakes; dip the ends of the pancakes in beaten eggs with added sugar and fry in butter, and when the egg has set, serve the dish with the pancakes on top, drenched in hot soup.
lo and behold, this is what it looks like:
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maybe it's not the most appetizing thing in the world, but please trust me when i say that this slaps. this is so fucking good. it has no right of being this good, but it is. why would they eat it back in the day if it wasn't good? this was for high-ranking nobles' kitchens. it had to slap. it had to be over the top and weird.
since the original recipe isn't very descriptive of how much of what you have to add, i'm gonna write it out with as many details as i can for those who aren't as kitchen-savvy and wish to try to make this tasty abomination. unfortunately i forgot to take pictures along the way, so no illustrations, sorry.
Ingredients (for about... 4 servings? I don't know. We had 2 and there was still a lot left):
for the pancakes:
500g of all-purpose flour
4-5 eggs (3 for the batter, 1-2 for later shenanigans)
like a cup of milk
2-3 spoons of sugar (brown sugar would probably be more historically accurate)
saffron (the more the better but watch out, it's expensive as shit)
some water if it turns out too thick
for the broth:
1.5 liters of water
3 stock cubes (if the package says one per 0.5l; otherwise just check what it says)
or you can just make broth from scratch if you want to roleplay a 17th century cook
3-4 chicken drumsticks (or an equivalent amount of veal or lamb)
cinnamon
black pepper
m o r e s a f f r o n
around 120g of butter (half a package if you're polish and know what i'm talking about)
one parsley root
3-4 tablespoons of wine vinegar
a... handful? of sugar. around 2-3 tablespoons, I guess
for the scrambled eggs:
4 eggs (or more; 1 per pancake)
a little bit of milk
1 tablespoon of sugar
e v e n m o r e s a f f r o n if you can afford it
raisins (or dried cranberries or whatever you want that has a similar taste size and texture)
you can also try to make this with rice instead of scrambled eggs. i imagine it can't be that hard.
the steps (there's a lot.):
Sieve the flour and add every other pancake ingredient into it; make sure the saffron is crushed into smaller bits
mix that shit with a hand mixer. it should be the consistency of like, sour cream, so if it's too thick, add a bit of water and check again. it's gotta be generally thick though, make sure it's not too runny (if the consistency is beginning to resemble banana juice, it's too runny already).
heat up the pan, put a little bit of oil on it with a folded paper towel (so you don't burn yourself on accident) and cook the pancakes until they're a bit golden, but not yet brownish in the spots that stick to the pan the most. basically just don't burn them. add a little oil the same way every 2 pancakes.
there's your pancakes, set them aside and move on to other stuff - it's broth time
boil the stock with the parsley root and your meat of choice, but don't add any spices yet, just the fuckton of butter. let it simmer for like an hour. yes, an hour. good soup takes time.
once the time has passed, you can add the spices. notice how i didn't really specify how much of the spices you have to add, and this is because you have to follow your heart and add as much as you can possibly handle eating. no, it's not gonna be too much. add that shit. add 3/4 of a 15g pepper packet. add almost the entire 15 grams of cinnamon. add like a bit of salt, but not a lot this time, just like 2 pinches. ADD THE SAFFRON. add the sugar. add more vinegar than you think would be enough normally. it's gonna boil away anyway.
mix it and let it simmer for even longer. taste it every now and then to see if you can handle it. if a few minutes after doing the dark magic listed above the taste is still very strong, that's good. if it's so strong your throat starts burning, you may be entitled to some more water in there, but if you don't start crying, leave it be. for like another hour.
time for scrambled eggs. rule of the thumb is 1 egg per 1 pancake and 2 pancakes per serving, so if you're cooking for 2, use 4 eggs. easy. add everything that i listed, but if you miss the sugar or the raisins, those can be added after you cook it.
once you have cooked the scrambled eggs, put it on a plate and wash your pan if you don't have another one/don't want to use another one. mix two remaining eggs in a bowl.
put the scrambled eggs with raisins (or whatever you decided to put in there) in your pancakes and roll them as tightly as you can manage. heat up your pan and put some butter on it.
CAREFULLY dip the ends of the pancakes in the mixed eggs and transfer them to the pan with butter. it may be easier to put them on the pan first and pour a little bit of the egg over the ends then, so if you're not sure you can dip them without the entire filling falling out suddenly, do that instead.
fry the pancakes on both sides until the egg is no longer in liquid form.
now, the serving:
pour a ladle of soup into a soup plate
put a piece of your meat in there too if it hasn't disintegrated completely and just started floating around in pieces
put two pancakes in the soup
now you can eat this thing. smacznego :)
I would also like to thank @slavicafire for posting weird old recipes sometimes and inspiring me to take the time to write all of this out :^)
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meidnightrain · 9 months
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1989 - a blog event
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❝ you took a polaroid of us then discovered, the rest of the world was black and white. but we were in screaming color. ❞
from: november first to november twenty-first
description: to celebrate the release of 1989 tv, i’ll be writing 21 fics inspired by the songs in the album 1989 tv by taylor swift though the last five songs will remain a mystery for now
warnings: reader is gn in all fics, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, tw will be put in fics itself on a later date
taglist: if you’re interested in following this event, drop an ask in my inbox to be added to the taglist or alternatively, follow the tag 🕊️ - 1989 event to read my fics!
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#O1 WELCOME TO FONTAINE - feat aether
traveling with the renowned traveler, you can’t help but be dazzled by him more than the sights of each nation
#O2 BLANK SPACE - feat yae
being the famous lady guuji comes with rumors that tarnish your reputation but yet, you aren’t deterred by them at all
#O3 STYLE - feat kaveh
despite all the warning signs in your relationship with the architect, you can’t help but think that maybe you were made for each other
#O4 OUT OF THE WOODS - feat gorou
your relationship has always been turbulent with the dog general and you decide that maybe parting ways is the best option
#O5 ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS STAY - feat ei
even though you’ve been pushed away multiple times, you’re not backing down from getting the archon to open up to you
#O6 SHAKE IT OFF - feat eula
in an attempt to get the spindrift knight to take a break, you give her the ultimate distraction, dancing.
#O7 I WISH YOU WOULD - feat navia
after a misunderstanding with your best friend, you both realise that you rather have constant quarrels than be apart
#O8 BAD BLOOD - feat alhaitham
arguments with your rival are common but this time, he takes it a little too far when his words hit close to home
#O9 WILDEST DREAMS - feat kazuha
in which you spend sunsets with the crux’s resident poet
#1O HOW YOU GET THE GIRL - feat wanderer
presenting…nahida’s foolproof and totally not subtle plan to get you and the wanderer together after endless pining!
#11 THIS LOVE - feat diluc
the dark-knight hero has always been known to keep a distance but he always ends up right by your side
#12 I KNOW PLACES - feat yelan
in which you get firsthand experience on what dating an intelligence agent is all about, playing the game and staying away from prying eyes
#13 CLEAN - feat ayato
the rain would wash away the tears and every trace left from your relationship with the yashiro commissioner
#14 WONDERLAND - feat lyney
when you wake up in a dreamland full of cheshire cats and whimsical creatures, a mad hatter is there to help you escape
#15 YOU ARE IN LOVE - feat childe
you’ve never given thought to your relationship with your childhood friend, until it changes into something different
#16 NEW ROMANTICS - feat beidou
after a bad breakup, a night out with your drinking buddy makes you realise maybe life isn’t as cruel as you thought
#17 “SLUT!” - feat wriothesley
in which you’d be the target of your romance with the duke, bear the burden of your relationship
#18 SAY DON’T GO - feat xiao
the vigilant yaksha would have stayed forever if you had told him to stay, but you were long gone now
#19 NOW THAT WE DON’T TALK - feat alhaitham
the ways that you avoided him would prove to be fruitless, because you both needed to talk
#2O SUBURBAN LEGENDS - feat furina
your relationship with the hydro archon would be warning to the audience that the divine and mortals don’t mix, that was if you had taken legends seriously
#21 IS IT OVER NOW? - feat kaeya
despite having been broken up with the cavalry captain in ages, your relationship still didn’t feel like it was over
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© AVENTURNE 2023. DO NOT COPY, REPOST, SHARE, TRANSLATE OR REUPLOAD MY WORKS ONTO ANY OTHER SITE WITHOUT MY PERMISSION
reblogs are appreciated to show your support for this event<3
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joelsgreys · 9 months
Text
Talk Tonight l Part 1 (Joel Miller x OC Female Reader)
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Series Masterlist
Summary: After their flight home is canceled, two complete strangers decide to spend the entire night getting lost together in one of the most beautiful cities in the world—what could go wrong?
Pairing: Pre Outbreak Joel Miller x OFC Camila Mendoza
Warnings/Tags: 18+ Only Minors DNI. NO big age gap, Joel is 35 and Reader is 29. Reader is a mixed woman of color, she is multilingual, although it is written in second person POV (I am terrible at doing third person, sorry) she does come with a name. I also do give her a physical description EXCEPT for her body type (she is shorter than Joel though). Ultimately, if you choose to read this story, you’re more than welcome to read it how you want! If you want to picture her as I write her or as your own—whatever tickles your fancy!
Chapter Warnings/Tags: preface angst (I sorry), we have our girl Sarah, Tommy is a pain in the ass but we love him, airport meet cute, Camila has a physical description, talk of her career and profession, I think that’s about it.
Word Count: 4.3k
A/N: Well, here she is. My lil passion project. It has been kind of nice to write something with zero expectations, not going to lie. No pressure, just straight vibing with this one. This chapter is quite tame, not a whole lot of action yet, but it obviously sets the story up for the good stuff. Tbh, the next chapter is my FAVORITE of the whole series and I almost wish I could skip this part and post that one because when I tell you it is cute, it is so fucking cute lmao. But anyway. I know this series might not gain a ton of traction, but I hope that the few people who DO read this enjoy my OC and grow to love her as much as I have and that you love this story as well. Also I just want to shoutout Doni @morning-star-joy for being so lovely to me and supporting my idea and letting me scream about Camila to her. 🩷
Charles De Gaulle Airport
Paris, France 
September 26th, 2002
07:00 Hours
“I beg your pardon?”
Startled by the sound of that rich, deep voice, that heavy Southern drawl that had become so familiar to you over the last nine hours, you lifted your face from your hands and whipped around in your seat; you’d turned so fast that you almost gave yourself whiplash. Your lips parted slightly in surprise when you saw Joel Miller standing there in the aisle with his plane ticket clutched in his hand.
He looked at you, then his dark eyes flickered over to the man sitting next to you. “Sorry I don’t mean to be a bother, but would you mind swappin’ seats with me?” He asked, politely. “I’ve got a good seat up in business class. It’s all yours if you’re willin’ to switch with me.”
The man raised an eyebrow. “What’s the catch?”
Joel shook his head. “There ain’t no catch, sir.”
“There has to be a catch,” he said, suspiciously.
“Ain’t no catch at all. It’s all yours, no extra charge, sir,” he told him, earnestly. “It’s more comfortable; there’s plenty of legroom. There’s also free food, a better selection of movies to watch. Oh and all the complimentary drinks that you can toss back from here to Austin,” Joel added, practically shoving his ticket right under the man’s nose. He hoped it had been enough to tempt him into agreeing to switch with him. “So? What do you say? Can we swap?”
“Well, I say you had me at complimentary drinks,” he remarked with a grin. He stood up, grabbed his carry on bag from the overhead compartment and took the ticket from Joel’s hand. Eagerly, he made his way up the aisle towards the front of the plane.
Dumbfounded, you couldn’t help but stare at Joel, your eyes widening as he slid himself into the seat beside you. “Hi baby,” he greeted you, his lips, soft and warm, brushing against your temple.
“Joel?” You sniffed, quickly dabbing at your damp, swollen eyes with the sleeve of your cardigan. “I’m confused. What in the world are you doing here? Is this even allowed?”
“It’s fine, Mila. I asked one of the flight attendants, she said it was okay so long as he agreed to it.” He put on his seatbelt and glanced over, noticing that your own seatbelt remained unfastened. Reaching over, Joel grabbed the two straps and pulled them around your hips, buckling it for you. He then gave it a firm tug to make sure it was secure. He felt the way you were looking at him and murmured, “Just wanna make sure you’re safe, baby. That’s all.”
“Joel,” You whispered his name thickly. “Seriously, what are you doing back here?”
Joel’s eyes met yours. “If I can get just a few more hours with you, I’m gonna take them. Camila, I will take every last second I can get with you, alright?”
“But—”
You stopped, clamping your mouth shut as a fresh batch of hot tears threatened to spill over.
“C’mere.” He cupped your cheek with his opposite hand and delicately tucked your face into the spot between his neck and his collarbone, soothing you softly, “I’m here, baby. It’s okay, I’m right here. I’ve got you.”
You clutched fistfuls of his denim jacket and clung to him desperately—it was almost as if you’d been clinging onto dear life itself.
“It’s gonna be okay,” Joel promised. “We’re gonna be okay, sweetheart. We’re gonna be okay.”
But that couldn’t have been father from the truth.
You and Joel weren’t going to be okay.
You knew that.
And he did too.
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Charles De Gaulle Airport
Paris, France 
September 25th, 2002
21:00 Hours
“You’re still in Paris?” Sarah shrieked loudly.
Wincing, Joel pulled his Nokia away from his ear.
She had nearly blown his goddamn eardrum out.
“Please tell me this is some kind of sick joke?”
He sighed heavily, tiredly rubbing at the side of his face with his opposite hand.
He should have known, expected even, that Sarah wouldn’t take the news of his current predicament all too well—she wouldn’t take it well at all.
Joel brought his phone back to his ear. “Sorry, but unfortunately this ain’t a joke, babygirl,” he replied to her after a minute, letting out another sigh. Joel glanced across the crowded airport lounge and he squinted over at the big digital sign hanging above the airline’s counter displaying all the details of his flight home to Austin, Texas. Even after about four hours, it still flashed red, signaling to everyone the flight was still very much delayed due to the harsh weather conditions on the route. Like Joel, several other passengers were growing restless. “We were supposed to take off a few hours ago, but there’s a pretty bad storm on the East Coast—”
Sarah cut him off with a dramatic groan.
“Oh, come on man! Are you fucking serious?”
“Hey now, you had best watch your language!” He chastised his teenaged daughter. “Don’t you think for one second that I ain’t gonna ground your little behind from halfway across the world, missy. I will ground you right from this airport.” He reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Christ, I leave you alone with Uncle Tommy for one weekend—”
“Tell me you’ll be home by tomorrow night, dad.”
He could hear the disappointment in her tone.
As if she already knew she would be let down.
Joel couldn’t blame her.
“I’m not sure when I’ll be home,” he admitted. “It’s lookin’ like the flight might get even canceled.”
“But tomorrow’s your birthday!” Sarah cried. “You have to be home for your birthday.” There’s a long, silent pause on her end of the line, but just as Joel was about to ask her if she was still there, she said in a sad, devastated voice, “It was supposed to be a surprise, but Nana and Grandpa are coming into town tomorrow. We planned a big birthday dinner, even ordered a special cake and everything. You’re always working on your birthday, we haven’t had a chance to properly celebrate it together in years.”
Joel’s heart sank, the guilt creeping in. “Sarah, I’m sorry, babygirl—”
“You just can’t be stuck in Paris, dad. You can’t—”
Suddenly, he heard Tommy in the background.
“Wait a damn minute, what did you just say? He’s stuck where, now? You’ve gotta be—here, give me the phone, kiddo.” There’s another long pause and then his younger brother’s voice came on the line. “What the hell do you mean you’re stuck in Paris?”
“Exactly what it sounds like,” Joel replied, flatly.
“You better be fuckin’ talkin’ about Paris, Texas.”
“Christ, Tommy! Watch your fuckin’ mouth around my daughter,” he hissed, knowing damn good and well that Sarah was standing beside him, listening to him. “I’m stranded at the goddamn airport here in France. I’ve been sittin’ on my ass for hours now just waitin’ around. My flight’s delayed due to that big storm over on the East Coast,” he explained. “I don’t know how long I’m gonna be here since they grounded all air traffic to the States. Nothin’s flyin’ out in that direction right now.”
“Oh c’mon, that can’t be true! Somethin’s gotta be flyin’ out of that airport to the United States. Have you tried switchin’ airlines?”
Annoyed, Joel snorted and rolled his eyes. “Jesus, Tommy, that ain’t how it fuckin’ works, you moron. Nothin’ is flyin’ out in that direction right now,” his voice was firm as he repeated himself. “That really so goddamn fuckin’ hard to understand?”
“Those Europeans put somethin’ in your water?”
“The hell you fuckin’ talkin’ about?”
“‘Cause your ass is crankier than usual, brother.”
Joel pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to keep his composure.
Even in his late twenties, Tommy refused to grow the fuck up and it often drove him to his wits end.
“Look, this long distance call is costin’ me a damn fortune, so listen and listen good, ‘cause I ain’t got a whole lot of time left,” Joel snapped. “I need you to do me a real big favor, alright?” Without waiting for a response from his brother, he continued, “It’s Sunday, so I need you to make sure that Sarah got all of her homework done this weekend. But check it for yourself—and don’t let her lie to you, Tommy. She’ll swear to you she did it, even if she didn’t. I’ll also need you to take her to school tomorrow. She can’t be late again. Her homeroom teacher already chewed me out for droppin’ her off after first bell. I need you to get her there before eight o’ clock. Do you think you can handle that for me?”
Tommy clicked his tongue. “Sorry I wasn’t listenin’ to you, what did you just say?”
Joel’s jaw clenched. “Tommy, I swear to Christ—”
He laughed. “I’m just fuckin’ with you, Joel. I got it all handled, okay? Uncle Tommy to the rescue.”
“Uncle Tommy’s a fuckin’ idiot,” Joel mumbled. “It ain’t a joke. Can I trust you to do this for me or do I need to call Mrs Adler and ask her for her help?”
“I’m a little offended,” Tommy scoffed out. “I think I’ve been takin’ real good care of Sarah on my own over these last few days since you’ve been gone. I mean, she’s alive and she’s breathin’ ain’t she?”
“Tommy—”
“Relax, Joel. I’ll check out her homework tonight, I promise. And I’ll get her to school tomorrow, make sure she ain’t late. You can trust me. Alright?”
“Not like I’ve got much of a choice,” he muttered.
“That’s the spirit.”
Joel rolled his eyes. “I’ve gotta go. Tell Sarah I love her and I’ll do my best to make it home on time for that not so surprise special birthday dinner Mama and Pop are comin’ into town for tomorrow night.”
“You got it, big brother.”
Joel ended the call and then shoved his Nokia into the pocket of his faded, black denim jacket.
He had to get back home by tomorrow night.
If he didn’t, Sarah would be absolutely crushed.
He’d spent his last three birthdays working double shifts just to help make ends meet—but ever since he finally got his construction business going with Tommy, the hours had been even more brutal now that it was just the two of them doing big jobs. He swore both to himself and to Sarah he would try to take more time off—for birthdays, holidays, soccer tournaments, dance recitals. To spend more of his time with her.
So far, he hadn’t been able to keep his word.
He felt like a jackass for it, but what could he do?
It wasn’t just about paying the bills anymore.
Sarah would be turning fourteen next year.
In a few years, he’d be putting her through college.
He needed to work to secure her future for her.
Joel sank back into his chair, taking a look around; his dark eyes scanned the lounge with disinterest.
That’s when you caught his attention.
Caught it and held onto it with a vice like grip.
Joel’s throat went dry.
Christ, you were so fucking beautiful.
Dark brown curls, soft skin the color of deep sand.
Your white sundress only accentuated the warmth of your smooth complexion, giving you a glow that was so radiant it knocked the wind from his lungs, making it hard for him to catch an even breath.
You were sitting in the row of chairs opposite his, a couple chairs down. He couldn’t be too sure, but it seemed like you were traveling alone—the chair on your left was empty and the one on your right held your tan leather satchel bag. Your nose was buried deep into a worn out, paperback book and he took notice of the way you would take the ballpoint pen that you had tucked behind your ear, using it to jot down notes on the crinkled, yellowing pages every so often. Then you would put the pen back behind your ear with a the tiniest, satisfied little grin.
Joel swallowed, his throat bobbing harshly.
He couldn’t take his eyes off of you.
You must have felt his stare because you suddenly looked up from your book, meeting his gaze. You’d seemed a bit startled at first, but then flashed him a pleasant, friendly smile.
Embarrassed, Joel quickly turned away from you.
Way to go you fuckin’ idiot, he thought to himself, silently. She probably thinks you’re a damn creep.
He feigned a sudden interest in the airplane that is parked right outside the gate, the very same plane he was supposed to have boarded four hours ago.
“Êtes-vous coincé ici aussi?”
The sweet, feminine voice came from beside him.
Startled, Joel looked to see you’d moved, and now occupied the once empty seat next to him.
“Uh, sorry. I don’t speak French,” he sputtered out nervously.
“Oh, I’m so sorry about that,” You said, making the effortless transition from French to English. “I just assumed, but I shouldn’t have.” Tossing him a soft and apologetic smile, you asked, “So then, you are an American too?” Of course, there was no reason to ask such a question when the answer was quite obvious, but you were trying to get a conversation with him going.
“Yeah.” Joel winced, mentally kicking himself over how curt he’d sounded. “I’m from Texas.”
Your hazel green eyes glimmered with amusement and you flashed him a brilliant smile that made his heart skip a beat or two inside his chest.
“I thought I detected a hint of a Southern drawl.”
“Oh trust me, it ain’t just a hint, darlin’.”
You threw your head back slightly, laughing. “Well, hello there cowboy,” You teased him, playfully. You were even more stunning up close and all he could do was hope that you couldn’t tell how nervous he was underneath the surface—eager to be chatting up a stunning woman like you, but still nervous.
“So what did you ask me just a minute ago?”
“I asked if you’ve been stuck here like me.”
Joel grinned, feeling a little more courageous.
“Ain’t it obvious what flight I’m waitin’ on, angel?”
“Oh very much so, cowboy.” Grinning back at him, you leaned back into your chair and made yourself comfortable. “I’m waiting on that same flight too.”
Joel chuckled. “At this rate we’d get to Austin a lot faster by swimmin’ across the Atlantic.”
“It’s too bad I don’t know how to swim. Otherwise, I’d say let’s get paddling,” You kidded, causing him to laugh again. “How long were you here in Paris?”
“Few days,” he answered. “Buddy of mine married his longtime girlfriend here. I was his best man.”
You wrinkled your nose at him. “Really?”
Amused, he asked, “Somethin’ wrong with that?”
“I mean, getting married in the most romantic city in the entire world? Don’t you think that’s just a bit cliché?”
Joel shrugged. “I suppose it is,” he agreed. “Come to think of it, can’t get more cliché than that. But I couldn’t say no to Wyatt. He’s been my best friend since we were in diapers,” he explained. “He asked me to be his best man. I couldn’t say no to him, no matter how fuckin’ cliché the whole thing was—”
He suddenly stopped, face burning.
“Sorry darlin’,” he apologized, sheepishly. “I should mind my manners. It ain’t polite to curse when I’m in the presence of a lovely lady.”
Your laugh sent a pleasant shiver down his spine.
Waving a hand, you assured him, “It’s totally fine. I don’t it mind at all.”
Joel smiled, angling his body towards you.
His nerves hadn’t disappeared, not completely.
But as the seconds ticked by, he felt more at ease.
Talking to you felt as natural as breathing.
Joel decided to turn the tables. “What about you? How long were you here for?”
“Oh, I wasn’t. I’m actually just here on a layover.”
“From where?”
“Somalia.”
Joel frowned. “I damn near failed geography when I was in high school. You’re gonna have to help me out a little here, darlin’. Where’s Somalia?”
“East Africa.”
“Africa?” His eyebrows shot up in surprise. He had never been into traveling—he preferred to stay put in his bubble in Texas. Flying out to Paris for Wyatt and the wedding had been Joel’s first time leaving the United States. He never had a desire to go and see the world, nor the interest. But he would have been lying if he said you hadn’t piqued his interest with such an unexpected answer. “What were you doin’ down there?”
“Working. I’m a traveling physician.”
Joel’s mouth fell open slightly. “You’re a doctor?”
You quirked an eyebrow. “Is that such a surprise?”
“How old are you?”
“It’s not polite to ask a lady her age,” You smacked his arm playfully. “Don’t you know that?”
He flushed. “Sorry, it’s just—you seem a bit young to be a doctor, that’s all. I wouldn’t have thought.”
Tilting your head to the side, you asked, “Well how old do you think I am, cowboy? And don’t lie to me just to stay in my good graces. I won’t be offended by your guess, I promise.”
“Twenty five?” Joel guessed, honestly. “Or twenty six?”
“You flatter me, but no. I’ll be thirty in December.”
“So tell me, doc. How long were you in Africa?”
“About a month,” You replied. “I was there with my team to visit some of the villages in Somalia to see families in need of basic healthcare. We offer them medicine and supplies, we offer vaccines. I tend to the children, mostly. I specialize in pediatrics.”
Joel couldn’t help but stare at you in awe.
“What?”
“That’s just really impressive,” he admitted. After a minute, he found himself asking, “Now that you’re done workin’ down there, are you goin’ back home to Austin for a while? That where you’re from?”
You shook your head, and he hoped he didn’t look as disappointed as he felt.
“I’m from Laredo,” You said. “But then I moved for college. I did pre-med at The University of Texas in Austin.”
“You visitin’ your old stompin’ grounds?” he joked.
“Something like that.” You giggled. “One of my old professors, he invited me to give a lecture to some of his students who are interested in medicine and might want to pursue careers in the field—I’ll only be in Austin for a day, then it’s off to my next work assignment.”
Joel shot you another incredulous look.
“What? Why do you keep looking at me like that?”
“I just figured you’d have to be some old geezer to give a lecture to college students.”
“Nope. You just have to be really good at what you do,” You winked at him. “That’s all.”
Before Joel could say another word, an attendant at the airline counter picked up their radio to make an announcement over the intercom—the flight to Austin had been canceled and all passengers were required to book a new one for the following day.
There was a collective groan in the lounge.
“Well, that’s a bummer,” You let out a tiny sigh and stood up, slinging the long, thick strap of your bag over your shoulder. Turning towards him, you gave him a warm smile. “Thank you for talking to me. It was nice having some company.” Lightly touching his shoulder, you said, “Good luck in getting home tomorrow, cowboy.”
Retracting your hand, you whirled around.
Joel jumped to his feet, ready to stop you.
But it was too late.
With the hustle and bustle of everyone scrambling towards the airline ticket counter, he’d quickly lost you in the massive crowd of people.
Joel craned his neck, searching around for you.
“C’mon,” he muttered. “Where’d you go?”
Finally, after a couple of minutes, Joel spotted you walking away from one of the counters with a new plane ticket in hand.
He didn’t even have to think twice about it.
Making his way through the crowd, Joel rushed to the counter and up to the same blond woman who had assisted you. “That girl who was just here, the one with the dark curly hair,” he said. “Can you tell me which flight she booked?”
The attendant gave him a strange look. “Yes she is on the first flight available to Austin,” she stated in a thick, French accent. “Seven in the morning.”
“I need to be on that flight,” Joel told her. Noticing the hint of annoyance on her face, he added in the most polite tone he could muster, “Please. And I’d like the seat next to hers, if it’s possible.”
She shot him another odd look, but typed away at her keyboard and checked the computer screen.
“My apologies, Monsieur. But the seat next to her has already been booked by another passenger.”
“What ‘bout one close to her, then?” He tried.
“I am afraid the only seats left available are at the very back of the plane or business class.”
Joel sighed. He pulled his wallet out from the back pocket of his jeans and handed her his credit card.
“Fine. I’ll just upgrade to a business class seat.”
The attendant nodded. “Of course, Monsieur.”
Once he was all set, he thanked her and started to make his way through the lounge and towards the exit. He walked outside and took a look around the terminal, his eyebrows pulling together.
He knew the chances of finding you were slim, but he took comfort in knowing that he would see you in the morning on the flight back to Austin.
Until then, he had about nine hours to kill.
“Suppose there’s worse cities to be stuck in,” Joel muttered to himself. Most places had translations, and he figured he could get by on his own alright. The hotel he’d stayed at with the wedding party, it wasn’t too far from the airport—after a drink and a bite to eat, he could book a room for the night and crash until the morning.
He started down the sidewalk, but then stopped—out of the corner of his eye he caught sight of your curls and his stomach fluttered eagerly.
You were standing in line waiting for a cab holding what appeared to be a map in your hands.
Before his mind and body could even try making a connection, he found himself walking over to you.
“Hey there,” Joel greeted as he approached you.
You looked up from your map and beamed at him.
“Hey! Did you manage to get a new flight home?”
He nodded. “Yeah, I did. I’m on the first one out to Austin at seven o’ clock in the mornin’.”
Your smile widened. “I’m on that one too!”
“You don’t say,” Joel said in a nonchalant tone. He didn’t want to admit he already knew that. “Well, if that just ain’t a funny coincidence.” His eyes fell to the map in your hands. “What’cha got there?”
“A map to the city.”
He laughed. “Gonna go sightseein’ or what?”
“I am indeed going sightseeing, actually.”
Joel’s smile faltered. “You serious? At this time?”
“I’ve been to Paris a couple of times before. I have always wanted to see it at night, but never had the guts to do it,” You confessed. “But here I am stuck for the next nine hours, so I suppose tonight is the night I finally do it.”
“You’re crazy.”
“I prefer the term adventurous.” Folding your map, you looked at him. “What about you, cowboy? You have anything planned for your night?”
Joel shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “Was gonna go grab a bite to eat and then get a hotel room to crash in.”
He was tempted, oh so tempted, to ask you to join him for a late dinner and drinks—just when he had worked up the courage to go for it, you spoke.
“Did you get to see the city while you were here?”
“I didn’t see much of anythin’,” he admitted. “With the weddin’ and all, I didn’t have the time. It ain’t a big deal, though. I ain’t a big sightseein’ kinda guy to begin with, you know?”
You raised your eyebrows at him. “Wait a minute, I just want to make sure I have this straight—you’ve got an entire commitment free night in Paris, and you’re going to spend it cooped up in some hotel room?”
Joel shrugged. “I reckon I am.”
“No way.” You grabbed his arm and started to pull him over towards an available cab. “You’re coming with me tonight.”
“Wait just a minute, darlin’—”
Ignoring him, you continued to drag him along. “It would a crime if you didn’t see this city before you go back home,” You stated, opening the back door to the car. You tried shoving him into the backseat but he caught himself on the roof of the vehicle.
“Whoa, whoa. Hold on there a second, angel,” he said with a chortle. “You’re really just gonna spend a whole night in a foreign city with a complete and total stranger you just met half an hour ago? What if I’m some kinda serial killer?”
You blinked. “Are you a serial killer?”
“Well no I ain’t a serial killer, but my point is—”
“Then we’re fine,” You chirped. “Come on, let’s go. There’s no time to waste.”
Pushing past him, you climbed into the backseat.
“You coming?” You asked over your shoulder.
Joel chuckled, sliding in next to you.
“Guess I am.”
He shut the door behind him—this was happening and yet somehow it didn’t even feel real.
A chance to spend the entire night with you?
It just didn’t feel real to him.
“I’m Camila,” You introduced yourself, extending a hand towards him.
He took your hand, holding it in his.
“Camila,” Joel repeated with a smile. “That’s a real pretty name for a real pretty girl.”
You grinned.
“How about you, cowboy? You got a name?”
“Joel. Joel Miller.”
You gave his hand a squeeze.
“Well Joel Miller, it seems like we aren’t complete and total strangers anymore, are we now?”
His own grin widened. “No, darlin’ I suppose we ain’t.”
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scribbleseas · 4 months
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in love & in war: the one where he meets you
Description: Join Ciel, the Earl of Phantomhive, as he embarks on one of the most difficult challenges of his professional life: getting you to fall in love with him in order to become the next chairman of TransAtlantica— your father’s vast shipping empire.
Warnings: The reader’s opinions are a bit old-fashioned, and they don’t reflect my own! Besides that, I’m sure there will be some explicit content down the line, but honestly, this story is much more romcom than our usually scheduled programming. It’s just a silly palette cleanser in season for Valentine’s Day.
Author’s Note: Hi! You guys expressed that you guys like more frequent posts, and I’ve reached a bit of a roadblock on my main Ciel fic right now. I thought I would write up a quick beginning to a potential drabble series! If you guys are interested in this premise, let me know! It’s fun to write such chill stakes content for once lol. Also, this isn’t based off a particular request! I’m still playing with my ideas from those, and at this point, I can confidently say you guys are getting either a one shot or a 1-3 part series based on one. Thank you all for submitting, and feel free to keep them coming.
Happy Reading!
- Dan
⇐ PREVIOUS DRABBLE | NEXT DRABBLE ⇒
MASTERLIST
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In Conference
April, 1895
Your life was nowhere near as easy as it seemed.
Perhaps, the average onlooker might see you and presume that the expensive jewels wrapped around your neck and your fingers were the most burdensome aspect of your privileged life. Or perhaps they might have thought it would be the pinch from your stately heels or the strain from a brilliant, yet strategic, permanent smile.
Your business smile. Your future-Countess-of-Richmond smile.
But they couldn’t have been more wrong.
This very moment was exact proof of that— you were in the midst of your world collapsing. The abject shock rattling through your mind was akin to a nightmare. Your eyebrows pulled together in a contentious pout, the horrified look you used to get away with your most childish crimes from your parents.
“Marriage? Simply not.” You begged, alreadying feeling your will to fight waver under your father’s tired stare, your mother’s pained grin. “I’m only—”
“Of perfect age to begin looking for a potential partner. 22 is well past ready, I would say,” your mother answered for you.
“I would be— but—” you sputtered like a fish out of water only to inhale deeply through your nose. You needed to collect yourself. Negotiate thoughtfully and logically. That was the only way to get yourself out of this.
“Speak with intent, Y/n,” your father interjected boredly, retraining his attention on the business reports he was reading. He fixed his glasses, pushing them further up the bridge of his nose.
Speak with intent. You knew those words well. They were your solace, the lighthouse in the storm that came with childhood temperament. Your father, no matter the cause of your distress, would answer: Speak with intent.
“Right,” you cleared your throat apologetically, glancing down at your hands as they sat clasped in your lap. “Sincerest apologies, sir.”
Your father hummed, eyebrows jumping a fraction of a centimeter. He picked up his pen and scribbled his signature at the bottom of the report. Your mother’s hand fell on the nape of his neck to make him turn his gaze back up at you. He hesitated before doing so, waiting to click a stamp onto the signed report.
“I do not wish to marry,” you enunciated your words carefully, confidently. “At least, not yet,” you added, now catching your father’s attention for the blunder. “I’ve yet to meet someone I love,” you felt your face redden, a desire to run back to your room threatening to overtake your fortitude. You were only so strong under your father, the Earl of Richmond’s deliberation stare. It struck fear into the other side of conference tables, lecture halls, and courtrooms. And now, across his desk at his only daughter.
Before your father could remind you that love wasn’t the most important aspect of a successful marriage, your mother interjected gently.
“What about the Duke of Clarence’s son, Antonio? He seemed to like you,” she prompted. Wrongly. You’d danced with Antonio at the Summer Solstice gala that the Pembroke family threw annually. The man opted to use the waltz’s entirety to brag about his family’s Italian vineyards and his love for agriculture. And, of course, his admiration for your father’s entrepreneurial genius. His shipping empire, TransAtlantica, had just successfully fortified shipping systems in all of the states; a step forward from simply cycling through all major ports along the east coast.
“He doesn’t love me,” you complained, “he loves TransAtlantica. He’d much prefer to marry our family corporation!” Antonio was suitable. He was decent, but that’s all he truly was to you. It’s all he ever could be.
You met your mother’s eyes pleadingly, and she pursed her lips, fully knowing the next words out of your mouth. You had a deal. From a young age, you knew the Richmond family, the Y/l/n line, respected contracts more than all else. Since you turned 17, you had one signed by all three parties and dated.
Your mother sucked in a breath through her teeth. “I remember the deal,” she said, taking a moment to consider her own words. The corners of her lips twitched as if she was attempting to hide her amusement with you. She understood— her own father, your grandfather, was just as militant, stiff with professionalism. Promises were negotiations with terms, signatures, and stamps. There were no arguments this way. “Dearest,” she addressed your father, the hand that was on the back jumping to his shoulder, “you do as well.”
“Do you?” You challenged, indignantly crossing your arms. “I request you restate the terms, mother.”
“If we are to pressure you into marriage before you feel ready, you must consent to the courting party,” your father took the liberty of answering gruffly. He squared his shoulders, regarding you purposefully— equal parts exhaustion and respect for your endurance. He cultivated it, after all. It was a fire that burned in your family for generations, as sacred as a temple flame.
“Yes,” you affirmed, “and so, I must choose the man I wish to be with.”
“With respect to your titles— no one below your station. And he must be chosen by the end of this courtship season,” your father added, negotiating. He tilted his head, analyzing your next move.
You knew of the first term since you were a child. You even remembered the exact day you learned them. You were a young girl, a little younger than seven. A young commoner boy had attempted to hand you a rose. Your maid at the time had scolded him for standing in the way of a noble family, since he had stepped out in front of you. It was a discernible moment, truly.
As for your father’s second term… you were unconvinced such a thing could be done.
“The end of the courtship season is in four months,” you replied, frowning. You were sure you met most eligible men in your social class. How were you to form a genuine connection in such little time? Even if you couldn’t find love per se, you still wanted to find someone you were compatible with.
“If we reach that deadline and you find no one, we can talk about it,” your mother answered. “And, you must allow me and your aunt to fix you on outings with suitors we like.
“Fine. Only if Daphne joins me,” you replied, knowing fully well that you weren’t allowed anywhere without your handmaiden present.
. . .
Next week
Your mother was sure not to waste any time in beginning to schedule supervised outings with a different well-educated and ennobled man that was within the appropriate age constraints. You’ve never had such a boring week, brutally torn away from the studies you adored so much.
“—And we’ve got another vacation home down in Tuscany, I think,” the Viscount Lineford’s son concluded, taking a peremptory drink out of his tea. He was dressed crisply in beige trousers that rolled up past his ankle and low leather shoes. His sterling watch sparkled in the spring sun.
You fought a building yawn that tempted the back of your throat, determined to hide your exhaustion with the man. It was a good effort, but you certainly weren’t impressed.
“That must be incredible,” you answered absently. “It must be such a lovely foreign getaway for the Lineford family,” you grinned diplomatically, blind to the horror that twisted his — you didn’t care to remember his name, unfortunately — face.
“Foreign? Excuse me Lady Y/n, but my family traces far back into Italian culture that we are practically Roman…” he started, only for you to interject.
“Will you just excuse me, please?” You struggled to keep the desperation out of your face, calmly searching for your supervisor. She was meant to be sitting at a table nearby, merely ensuring that your outing remained within polite societal constraints. More importantly, Daphne served as your escape when your potential suitors proved most unbearable. All you needed to do was subtly tilt your fan to your left ear and the woman would always scramble over to you with an excuse to steer you out of any scenario you found distasteful.
Such as this one.
Daphne never normally left your side, a realization that allowed worry to creep into your tone. “I’m unsure where my maid went, and I would like to fetch her,” you replied, standing and shouldering your small day bag over your shoulder.
“I’m sorry?” He asked, chuckling with bitter disbelief at your rudeness. Ladies were supposed to be demure and polite. You were impatient and honest, a product of an Earl knowing that his daughter was the object of his legacy. Your father trained you as he would a son, and your tutors followed in suit. “Surely you’re joking; this is the middle of our tea.”
Her pocketbook and her sweater weren’t even sitting on the chair she had been occupying, causing you to blink at the empty table in disbelief.
“No, I’m not. I think something might be wrong,” you shouldered past the man, stepping between other individuals sitting at the common tables in the park.
“Fine, you aren’t worth it anyway!” He called at your back, but the words hardly registered with you.
The area was rather common for courting pairs to visit in the early spring. However, it could also be populated with…criminals. “Excuse me,” you mumbled, quickly walking down the paved pathway through the greenery to the main sidewalk, the London pavement heavy with pedestrians. The streets were perhaps more crowded with carriages and sweating horses.
You couldn’t be alone in the city! As a woman of your stature, it simply wasn’t done. Never. Ever. It was an affront to your teachings, and it was unsafe. You needed your friend, not some stranger.
“Where is she?” You mumbled, rapidly attempting to discern every face that passed you. Surely it wouldn’t be long until someone recognized you— you were one of the most photographed families in the country. In fact, you were fortunate no one had offered your location to the press while you were on this outing. You never would have heard the last of it.
Some took hold of your handbag and darted off, using your distractedness to his advantage. He ran to the end of the block and crossed the street, weaving through pedestrians once the crossing guard allowed your side to walk over. If your hand hadn’t been tightly clutching the strap as you walked, you never would have noticed.
You did your best to pick up your speed and chase him, yelling out.
You cried out, glancing down at your long springtime dress. Your short heels were nowhere near efficient enough for you to make a chase out of the robbery, nor should have needed to! Even still, you lunged into the street — without looking.
In fact, if you had committed to your step, you would’ve been flattened by an oncoming carriage, given that the crossing guard had ordered pedestrians to stop passing moments prior. The only reason why you didn’t make the life-ruining step seemed to be… a tall young man with a serious face and staggering presence. He only had one exposed blue eye, the other was concealed by a black eyepatch. His grip tightened around your arm, pulling you intimately into his chest.
You breathed heavily, tearing yourself out of his arms. A flair of irritation caused you to glare at him as you righted your stance and smooth your dress. However, he did save you from a potentially life ending situation. His immediate insurance of your safety was more meaningful than a misaligned gown that you fixed in seconds.
In fact, the moment truly was a bit theatrical. The man was handsome enough to make you smile with uncertainty, your irritation melting. “Thank you for that,” you said, relieved that the sidewalk seemed to clear, the crowd dispersing from the main street. “I could have been killed.”
“That would have been quite a shame,” he replied, locking eyes with you. The man made a thin attempt at returning your smile. He was enchanting, regal… your heart skipped a beat, considerably flustered.
…Until he spoke again, completely distorting the immediate magnetic lure you felt from his sharp features: “Rather careless of you, my Lady. You ought to be smarter than that.”
You frowned. “In case you failed to notice, that man stole my handbag and essentially disappeared,” you snapped impatiently. It had your identification, emergency notes in case you needed to purchase something, the current novel you were fixated on…how were you meant to return to the estate now?
“You weren’t catching him, I don’t think,” he noted astutely, watching you as you stepped past him to go in the direction you came from. Perhaps Daphne circled back to the park in search of you. You absolutely needed to find her.
“Thank you for your help. Good day,” you answered brusquely, continuing to walk. However, he remained in stride with you, still unabashedly smug. It quickly absolved you of any former gratefulness you had toward the man for pulling you away from oncoming traffic. Perhaps it might have hurt less to have collided with a horse and a carriage over the velocity and mass of this random man’s ego.
“What, don’t tell me you going to go chase him,” He said patronizingly, a sardonic pull infecting what you thought was initially a careful smile. No, the man was just another arrogant bastard, it seemed. “In those shoes, especially,” He perused, causing you to stop once more and regard him.
“I am a noble woman, you will not speak to me in such a manner no matter what line of—“ you caught the sapphire family and silver crest rings around two of his fingers — “mediocre destitution you come from!” You jabbed purposefully, undeserving of his rudeness and his condescension, no matter what title he occupied in your class. You were the partial inheritor of TransAtlantia; you trained to run the company to some degree since you could speak. Few could step to you.
“I believe I said good day, kind sir,” you added poisonously, daring him to continue to test you before speeding back towards the park. You needed Daphne, you needed an officer…anyone besides this pompous— you ended the thought before you could further infect yourself with such unladylike curses.
It really wasn’t so easy being the daughter of an Earl.
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CIEL PHANTOMHIVE
“I’ve planned things so Lady Y/n’s maid is off helping a little girl find her mother; I separated the two by distracting the girl with a kitten. Y/n will panic without her maid being within her immediate reach, drawing her out to the street. I will cause her to put herself in harm’s way by distracting her at the corner of 89th Street and Arthur. Be ready by the street post. I’ve made the new paralegal late to his case, he will have instructed his butler to drive quick. You will need to pull her away from the street. If you miss, things may end rather…unfortunately for the young woman,” Ciel Phantomhive’s butler, Sebastian Michealis, outlined.
Sebastian was Ciel’s head butler, his head chef, head landscaper, tailor, tutor… but most importantly, the Earl of Phantomhive’s contracted demon. The supernatural being was at his disposal and his bidding; his new role being the most interesting one of all: matchmaker. He fabricated a scene for Ciel to meet Y/n Y/l/n, and ideally, make her love him.
It was simple, really. Ciel needed a wife; Y/n’s family needed a competent businessman to run that prosperous giant of a shipping enterprise; and most importantly, the woman seemed to be rather competent. The only danger to his strategy was, of course, Y/n’s foul storybook idealism, apparently. Ciel knew Y/n was highly educated and well graced in ettiquiete, but she seemed intent on finding some happily ever after of sorts.
She wanted a husband— a bloody love match. No— she needed an actor to convince her that she was worth marrying beyond the incredible status she represented. There was no asset greater than a title and an economic monarchy to inherit, and securing such a prize meant that Ciel needed to woo her.
“My Lord, you must be considerate, but not too kind. Though you should also refrain from acting too smugly or the lady may take offense,” his butler had offered some horrifically embarrassing — and incredibly unhelpful — acting lessons for him to express the particular warmth Lady Y/n seemed to be looking for.
Love. A feeling Ciel hadn’t known in around nine years. Arguably, it could’ve been more. And yet, in order to stop being solicited by desperate mothers and unlikely candidates, he was securing his bride.
According to Ciel’s butler, that meant he needed to create a memorable foundation in the woman’s mind, an introduction that would leave her curious, impassioned. Wanting more. Something to make him stand out amongst the other faceless, classless mouth breathers who would be vying for TransAtlantica, now that word of her search for a suitor was widespread.
The company and Y/n’s hand were all one in the same courtship, and Ciel was sure the was going to win both.
The Earl of Phantomhive was never one to lose. He’d be remiss to start now.
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wildemaven · 11 months
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Sweet Creature: Chapter Six
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Pairing: Dieter Bravo x F!Reader
WC: 4511
Warnings: 18+ Blog; mentions of food and drinks, unwanted touching, self doubt, pining, two dumb dumbs navigating fEeLiNgS, reader has a nickname but has zero descriptive features, fluff, like always please let me know if there’s anything I missed.
A/N: This chapter!! I think it’s just been a week for me, dealing with minimal sleep and a teething babe— I was near giving up on it. But, it’s done! Wrote out a good portion of it and then hated it so I rewrote it and then ending up going in a completely different direction— but I like where it ended up going. Thanks again for all the love and kind words on this series!! Only 4 more chapters to go!! Adding: Thank you to @gnpwdrnwhiskey for beta’ing this labor of love and all her support and help as I write this!
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An endless loop of vivid thoughts frequent your weary mind— starting early in the morning and well into the evening. 
Dieter, his stupid handsome face and the way he has you falling for him, your brain in a constant flustered state. 
You keep mulling over the possibilities of allowing yourself to be vulnerable, open to the idea of something growing between you and Dieter. 
Each alternative has its advantages and risks. 
Leaning into your feelings and granting Dieter access to the thing you’ve spent years guarding, trusting that he will stand alongside you as you fully open your heart to a chance at a future together. 
But what if he doesn’t want the same things as you?? You contemplate if settling for just his friendship is enough, never pursuing the growing connection between you, accepting him in your life but always at an arm's length. 
Dieter’s impending departure has you a mess, your growing feelings for him only making it worse. 
“Are you still there sweetheart?” 
“Yeah— Sorry Mom, I’m still here.” You assured her, finishing up the rest of your makeup as you get yourself ready for the Capri Hotel’s big event. 
“You sound so far away. What’s bothering you?” 
“Ugh. I don’t even know where to begin Mom. None of it’s really all that bad, just a lot at once I guess.”
“Well, I’m here to listen if you need to get it off your chest.” 
Moments like these, you wished she lived closer, missing your kitchen conversations at the end of a long day. No matter how depleted she was after work, she made dinner with a smile and sat for as long as you needed her to, her shoulders always carrying the weight of your heart when needed. 
“Just trying to keep it together most days. School has been busy, end of year things have me drained. Then there’s the whole gallery thing, it has me stressed I won’t be ready for the showing. I’ve finally managed to get a chunk of my pieces painted and prepped— I have like 5 more to do. And I’m sad it’s closing, I only have a few classes left there.” You pause for a moment, you hadn’t intended on an emotional dump when you called your Mom, just wanted to check in and say hello. “It’s all good things though, so I don’t even know why it feels overwhelming, I guess I feel like I’m going to let someone down somewhere along the way.”
“Hmm. Well, I know how hard you are on yourself, but I also know how hard you work— especially when it involves all the things you love. You’re going to get through it all! I believe in you.”
Her voice feels like a warm embrace as it drifts through your phone, the stress already feeling like it has lifted a bit with her reassurance. 
“So, how are things with your guy? Any new things on that front?”
“Well, he’s not my guy.” Chuckling at her abruptness. “I feel like we’re in a good place now— he feels like a close friend that I’ve known my whole life. And the more time we spend together, the more I—“
“The more you what?”
“I don’t even know, Mom. Like there’s these things he does, I don’t know if he’s just being nice or what, but he does these little things that make me so happy. He brings me coffee in the mornings when he drops his niece off at school, leaves little notes for me on the cups— I save them Mom, I have a stack of these coffee cups in my kitchen.”
You hear a muffled hum, her signal that she’s already preparing her response to what you have to share, but allowing you to continue. 
“He came to one of my classes, and you know what he did? He painted a portrait of me— who does that?! And now, we text each other all the time and I can’t stop smiling when his name pops up on my phone, because I can’t stop thinking of him. Then he gave me this cute nickname that makes my insides turn to goo any time he says it and I— I…”
“You love him, don’t you?”
“Yeah— I do.”
*
The air is dry, heat waves dancing across the scorching cement, an array of popular songs blaring from the DJ booth situated on the green lawn adjacent to the hotel’s pool deck. 
The re-grand opening celebration of The Capri in full effect. 
The hotel had been drawing in plenty of guests after the renovation, rooms booked out regularly, a quintessential tourist destination for the small town. Its mid-century design of wood, natural tones and pops of color paired with the sleek modern aesthetic throughout the hotel’s property was beginning to be recognized by many publications, all looking to showcase the hotel’s unique style in upcoming pieces. 
The hotel’s name, big white block letter signage, sits atop the covered entryway. A parked yellow Chevy Deluxe adds to the ambiance of the building’s timeless look. 
Giant palm trees and tropical-esque plants in terracotta pots decorate the grounds of the hotel. Small gardens with intimate seating had been strategically placed for optimal usage. A large lawn space in the back was draped in string lighting and had the perfect view of daily sunsets. The pool itself was a perfect backdrop for a day of relaxing, vintage woven lawn chairs and oversized umbrellas lined each side of the large pool surrounded by lush greenery. 
Dieter was able to snag a chair early on, perks of knowing the hotel owner, the umbrella shade blocking enough of the sun to make the extremely warm weather bearable. 
He’s trying his best to enjoy himself, knowing he’s doing Diem a favor keeping an eye on Wren while she’s running around doing her hotel-party hostess duties, but the growing crowd of guests and invitees feel more overwhelming, reminding him of the elaborate Hollywood parties he’s attended. 
Only a few people have stopped to ask for autographs or pictures, slightly surprised there’s still a fan base that has an interest in him these days. 
“How come they don’t want me to sign their papers? I know how to write my name too!” Wren, her voice tinged with a pouty tone, says from where she’s lounging on her chair next to him. 
“I don’t know, Birdie. Next time, you can sign your name too, seems only fair.”
“Okay. I can draw a heart for them too.”
Wren, satisfied with the compromise, goes back to sipping on her iced lemonade and watching one of her shows on her iPad, zero interest in what's going on around her. 
“How’s she doing?” Diem asks as she sits on the edge of the Wren’s chair, placing another lemonade on the small accent table between the two of them. 
“She’s good, wanted to take a break from swimming for a bit. You, umm— hear from Poppy yet?” 
“Why? You finally going to tell her you’ve got it bad for her??” 
Grateful his sunglasses are dark enough to block the eye roll intended for Diem, he glances over to see Wren still absorbed into her show then back to Diem and whispering a low -fuck off- accompanied with a playful middle finger. 
“She texted me a bit ago, said she was running late, but would be here soon— Oh! Speak of the devil, look who just arrived. I’m going to go say hi and I’ll send her over so you can tell her how much you’ve missed her.” Diem’s menacing voice earns her another middle finger from Dieter, leaving him to greet you properly. 
Dieter catches sight of you weaving through the pack of bodies meandering around the pool, taking in how your face lights up the minute you see Diem welcoming you with a hug, both of you embracing each other as if you hadn'tnd just hung out days prior. 
He’s seen you in your casual clothes outside of school before. Usually a pair of favorite jeans and t-shirt, a sundress sprinkled in on warmer days, but something about seeing you in a bathing suit and shorts has his brain short-circuiting almost instantly. 
Tilting his head forward, his pointer finger pulling his sunglasses slowly down the bridge of his nose. He’s completely taken aback, mesmerized by you, noting every little detail—  your captivating features that make him absolutely weak, every delicate curve so perfectly placed, each flaw you try so hard to hide merely a perfect addition to your allurement. 
The second you and Diem turn in his direction, he’s shaken out of his trance, trying to focus on anything to make his blatant staring seem less obvious. 
“I see an open chair next to Dieter, do you think he’ll mind if I hang out with them?” You point to the open space next Dieter, who is helping Wren navigate something on her iPad. 
Unfortunately, as you say it, you notice a beautiful woman sitting in the lounger you were inquiring about. You try your best to keep the tinge of jealousy concealed, the last thing you want is to draw any sort of attention to your feelings for Dieter at this time. 
“Never mind, I’m sure I’ll find somewhere to set my stuff.” There’s a subtle hint of sadness in your eyes, avoiding watching the women openly flirt with him. 
“Babe, you good?” Diem sensing the shift in your demeanor instantly. Peering back at Dieter to see the interaction he’s having with the woman, who now has her hand on his arm, caressing it as she tilts her head and openly ogles him— her fake laugh is a dead give away that she only sees Dieter for his Star Status and nothing more. 
“Yeah— y-yeah, I’m good.” Forcing a somewhat convincing smile. 
“Hey, I’ve got to go check on catering, make sure everything is running on time and then I’m going to grab Wren for her nap— the last thing I need is a 6 year old meltdown. Don’t worry about her, she doesn’t really seem like his type anyways. We’ll catch up in a bit.” Giving you another hug, letting it linger for a minute, then Diem takes off in the direction of the catering truck. 
You’re left standing there, feeling exposed and alone among a sea of strangers. Nervously scanning anywhere but in the direction of where Dieter and the woman are clearly flirting. You contemplate what an appropriate amount of time to spend here would be, before slipping out unnoticed. 
It reminds of you showing up to a middle school dance, dressed in the new fancy dress you picked out for the special occasion in hopes of seeing the cute boy, who’s name you spent most of the school year scribbling in your notebooks. Only to walk into the dimly lit and poorly decorated gymnasium to see he is with the head cheerleader and they’re both making heart eyes at each in the middle of the dance floor. 
Part of you wants to shrink into the shadows of the crowd, ruminate over the signals you read completely wrong this whole time. Dieter was just being nice, friendly— at no fault of his. You blame yourself for thinking he might have some interest in you, reading into the little details and thinking that you were even his type— clearly far from it. 
An up tempo song blasts through the speakers, amping the tone of the party up and pulling you out of your brief moment of sulking. 
Friends. Just friends. Dieter and you are friends and that has to be enough for you. 
You head in the direction of the open bar, hoping an ice cold beverage will help unburden your angsty thoughts. 
“We should hang out sometime!” Dieter cringes at the advances this random woman keeps making towards him. 
If this wasn’t his sisters hotel, he’d probably wouldn’t feel bad in being harsh and telling this woman to fuck right off. But he doesn’t want to cause a scene, not knowing how she would react to his rejection. 
“Umm, I don’t know— I’ve got a lot going on right now.” Let her down easy. 
“Oh come on! You’re not doing anything, you just got out of rehab— and they’ve got you trapped in this boring town too. I’m sure we could find something fun to do together. I know a few parties are happening in WeHo coming up, I can make a few calls— get some treats to liven things up.” Her hand still fondling his arm. 
He winces at her crass comment, a reminder of why he chose to escape the acrimonious world of Hollywood. 
He doesn’t have a single regret about being here in Ojai either, he enjoys its simplicity and is starting to feel like he could see himself here long term. 
“Look, I’m sure you're nice and all— but I’m not interested.” 
“Okay, well we can do something else then. How about we go back to my room, I’m staying here.” Wiggling her hotel key between her fingers. 
She’s clearly not grasping at the obvious hint Dieter is giving her. 
“No, I’m not interested in your room or you.” He says politely, grabbing her hand and removing it from his arm. 
“What do you mean?!”
“He has a girlfriend, lady!” Wren piped up in Dieter’s defense. 
“Wait! You have a kid? And a girlfriend?”
“No— to both things.” 
“God, rehab made you so fucking boring.” She scoffed, offended by his sobriety and his lack of interest in her. 
“Okay, so what we’re not going to do is that, my niece is right here. You can go now.” 
She didn’t hesitate at his request, grabbing her things and walking away— pretending to be unbothered by the rejection. 
“Sorry about that Birdie. Some people are just—“
“Weird!”
“Yeah, weird. Hey, Birdie?”
“Yeah.”
“I know you think Poppy is— she’s not my girlfriend, we’re just friends. So, let’s maybe not call her that anymore okay?” Although, he likes the way the two words mix together in the same sentence. 
He worries it’s going to slip in your presence, he knows wren means no harm by it, but he would hate for you to feel uncomfortable if you ever were to hear her say it. 
“Mhmm.” Her non-committal response earns her a laugh, fully focused on her show like nothing ever happened. 
Dieter takes in the lively atmosphere around him. Laughter emanating from the party guests gathered in small groups around the pool, a carefree crowd dancing throughout the lawn area, smiles plastered on everyone’s faces— he couldn’t be more proud of Diem and all she has accomplished. 
Readjusting the collar of his colorful half buttoned shirt, Dieter settles back into the chair, letting the sun kiss every bit of his exposed skin. 
“How are things going over here?” Diem quietly asked, pulling Dieter from his ruminative thoughts. 
Diem scoots Wren’s listless legs over to allow room for her to sit down, leaning over she grabs the device from her tiny sleepy hands, Wren’s little head nodding as she struggles to keep her drowsy eyes open. 
“No complaints, looks like you had a good turnout. I’m really proud of you Diem, not just all of this,” His hand pointing around to her accomplishments on display in the form of a successfully running hotel and her well executed re-grand opening festivities. “But with Wren too. I’m glad that I got this chance to be with you both.”
“Don’t go getting all sappy on me—“ Her voice wobbly and soft as she beams at his acknowledgment of her dedication to her work and Wren. “Thank you. And I wouldn’t have been able to pull this off without your help.”
Dieter nods, mirroring her heartfelt gratitude. 
“Have you seen Poppy? I saw you both talking earlier.” He hopes he doesn’t sound too desperate, wanting to know your whereabouts, if you’re okay and why you’re not here— with him. 
“She didn’t make it over?” His brows draw together, shaking his head slightly. Her nose wrinkled at the realization of why you hadn’t come over. 
“What?” 
“She saw you and your— little friend earlier, I don’t know for sure, but she seemed somewhat saddened by it. I’m surprised she didn’t come over though.” 
“Shit! I gotta go. You good with her.” He stands abruptly, an unnerving feeling creeping up from his chest, hoping you didn’t mistake what you saw for anything but an awkward fan interaction. 
“Yeah, go. I’m going to go put her down in my office.” Scooping up Wren’s sleeping frame. “Dieter?” 
He turns back to her calling his name, hands flexing at his side, a nervous tick of his, as he waits for what Diem has to add. 
“You should tell her.” 
He’s not sure why it’s so difficult to find someone in a somewhat enclosed area. His eyes scanning every ecstatic face as he sidesteps through conversations anchored in effervescent exuberance, a stark contrast from his growing collection of spiraling thoughts. 
If he could just find you, explain the situation to you in its entirety. 
Explain how he truly feels. 
How you'rer his first thought when he wakes in the morning, the giddy anticipation of seeing how beholden you are as he hands you the coffee he picks up from the bakery Wren and him stop at before school, how he takes in the way you tilt your head just enough to read the ridiculous notes he scribbles on the sides of each cup, “Have a Brewtiful Day!” “Better latte than never.”—each one extracting the most intoxicating laugh. 
How he looks forward to seeing your face light up at his stupid jokes, never once admitting how horrible you think they are. 
How you’re an added reason for him to want to be sober, never wanting to be on the receiving end of your disappointment in him. He wants that rewarding experience of seeing how proud you are of him. 
And how he wants nothing more than to have you in his arms— morning, noon and night, keeping you as close as he possibly can, terrified that you’ll disappear the moment he lets you go. 
His world seems to come to a standstill, everything he had been working up the courage to tell you, drained from his mind instantly. 
Utterly shattered by the sight of you. 
That smile of yours, paired with a full body laugh, directed at the man standing next to you. Your hand holding the top of his oversized bulging bicep as his large hand gently cups your elbow, leaning into each other as you both exchange words. 
A reality he hadn’t even considered in the time he spent looking for you— you being happy with someone who isn’t him. 
Crushed. 
Confused. 
Broken. 
It’s a dizzying sensation. A chance lost— or so he thinks. 
Rubbing his hands against his shorts, removing the evidence of his anxious response to seeing you wrapped up in what looked like an intimate conversation, his head still in a fogged state of shock. 
He manages to will his body to move from where he’s been standing. His jaw ticks anxiously, surrounded by bodies dancing around his blurry peripherals. Releasing a deep sigh, he looks back to you once more, looking for what he hopes is closure. 
Instead, he catches the moment the man you’d been friendly with, gesturing a goodbye as he retreats from the space he’d been sharing with you. 
Dieter watches the way your expression morphs from bright and bubbly to soft and muted the minute you're alone, leaning against the cocktail table with your face tucked into your shoulder, closing yourself off from everything and everyone. 
“Mind if I join you?” Dieter calmly approaches you, still holding on to the single thread of hope that he didn’t lose his chance. 
“Hey! Of course you can.” Your face instantly lights up at the sight of him, patting the open spot on the table, genuinely welcoming him to be with you. 
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything?” 
“What do you mean?” A line appears between your brows, shifting your body to fully face him with one arm still draped over the table top, your fingers casually drawing shapes onto the silky thin table cloth. 
“The guy, I saw you talking to him— looks like he works out, a lot— the man is very hot.” Words fumbling out of his mouth, as he points back in the direction he thinks he saw the muscular guy head in. “I just mean, I don’t want to interrupt if there’s something potentially happening there.”
Your lips pressed together in an attempt to fight off the urge to laugh. 
“What?”
“There was nothing happening there, like at all. That was Dan, he’s a good friend and he comes to classes at the gallery. I’d offer to introduce you two, since you think he’s so hot, but he just got back from his honeymoon— with his equally hot husband. We were just catching up.” 
Dieter winces at your explanation of who the man was, feeling like an idiot for so foolishly assuming you were falling for the guy. 
“Besides, he’s not really my type.” You state boldly with your head cocked to the side, one eye squinting to block the sun rays as you take stock of the way the sunlight tangles in his hair. 
“Where’s your friend from earlier? She was really pretty. You both really seem to be hitting it off earlier.” Keeping your tone neutral, looking down at where your fingers are now pulling at a loose thread on the tablecloth, preparing yourself for how his response is definitely going to wreck you. 
His hand settles next to yours, his fingers nervously tapping onto the hard surface. 
“Actually, I have no clue who she was— didn’t even ask for her name, didn’t want to know it either. Sure, she was pretty and maybe in different circumstances I might have been interested in her… She was pissed though when I turned her down, I actually had to tell her to leave.”
“Really— Why?” Your attention drawn back up to where he’s still studying you, his brown eyes locked with yours, now etched in a glistening golden light from the setting sun. 
He lifted his shoulders in a gentle shrug, taking a deep breath as he looked at you, “She just isn’t who I’m interested in.” 
When you think back to when you were growing up, constantly daydreaming about what it would feel like the moment you realized you were in love, and if it would feel as good to have that same feeling reciprocated back to you, by someone who wholeheartedly felt the same way. 
You decide that this is that moment, and it’s even better than you imagined it would be. 
Dieter’s eyes drift over to the table, his hand slowly inching closer to yours, the light brush of his fingers over the top of your hand is electric, your breath catching as he begins to intertwine his fingers with yours. 
His thumb, tender as it slowly smooths over the ridges of your hand, glancing back to you to make sure that there’s no sign of discomfort in your face— you squeeze your fingers, a silent ‘I’m more than okay with this’. 
A breeze picks up, his hair tousling around as it blows through where you both are standing. You lift your free hand to swipe the hanging curls out of his face, your fingers taking liberty to rake through his downy hair, each curl bouncing back into place. 
“What’s your type then?” It’s menacing the way his husky voice cuts through the steady silence, encouraging you to share with him. 
“Hmm…Tall, funny, sweet, driven, pretty— like really fucking pretty. Also has to answer to Uncle Dude in the presence of a sweet little 6 year old. Know of anyone who might fit that description?”
He nods along as you list off each quality, his eyes lighting up at mentioning good-looking. 
“That’s quite the list.” He quips, your breathy laugh prompting a lopsided grin from him. “So— pretty, huh?”
“Yeah— really fucking pretty.” Your words are drawn out in a sincere manner, noting the way his eyes crinkle a little at the compliment. 
Dieter’s hand nestles at the base of your neck, drawing your body closer to him. His touch potent and satisfying, as he commits to memory the way your skin feels beneath his fingertips, gliding them down your bare spine leaving goosebumps in their wake— his gaze never leaving yours. 
“You’re interested in someone?” The answer seems obvious, but you want to hear it from him. 
“Poppy, you gotta know it’s you—“ He utters earnestly with both of his hands now cupping your cheeks, watching the way your lips part as he leans in closer. “I lo— like you so fucking much Poppy, you’re the only one I’m interested in.”
The way he started to say that he loves you, it feels like you might float away, anchoring your hands on his wrists. Everything tingles in your stomach, he’s so close, his breath fanning over your lips. Your lashes flutter as he slowly angles your face, his nose brushing against yours. 
It’s a whirlwind of energy drifting between both of you, building intensity with each passing second, the finality of the moment bound to be explosive. 
Tiny hairs of his mustache grazing the underside of your nose. The top of his lip begins to settle over yours, it’s pillowy weight slowly meeting your—
*RING RING RING*
“Fuck!” The word vibrates across your upper lip at the vexing sound of Dieter’s phone ringing, offensively interrupting the flow of your almost kiss and urging him to answer it. 
“I swear, if that’s Diem—“ A picture of Diem and Wren lights up the phone screen, his thumb swiping across to accept the call, he stands to his full height as he presses the device to his ear. “Hey, what’s up?… Okay… Yeah…Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute then… Love you too, bye.” Dieter ends the call and shoves his phone back into his pocket. 
The entire phone conversation, his focus remains on you. His free hand never leaves the side of your face, thumb stoking across the warmed apple of your cheek—Your hand still holding on to him, the cadence of his heart-rate is rapid against your palm. 
“Diem?” 
“Yeah, she said Wren wanted to go home. She has to stay for another hour or two, make sure things close out here before she can head home.” He explains, zero annoyance detected in his face. “You okay?”
“Y-yeah, I’m perfect.” You say  softly, an airy smile spreading across your face. “What do we do now?”
Dieter takes in your question, so many answers floating around in his mind, but none of them feel sufficient enough at this moment, wanting to properly share everything he’s been feeling without being rushed or interrupted. 
He leans back into your space, his lips pressing a chaste kiss between your brows before resting his forehead against yours. 
“We’ll figure it out as we go.”
Next
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apurplenessie · 8 months
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How would the 141 + Alejandro + Rodolfo + König React to a morning “helpout”?
MDNI! GN Reader!
! GN reader! Part 2 Alejandro & König. Sorry for taking  wayyy too long to write, work and school  is a bitch. (fellow IB’ers whats uppppp?) this one is a long boi (2.6k words ;) dont tell me i dont treat my fellow alejandro & könig enjoyers well)
keep in mind i've never written for these characters before ( also i'm not fluent in spanish nor german + english is my third language so yk read with a grain of salt). Requests are more than welcome! THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT THO! I defiently want to write for Gaz soon but i gotta figure out his character better!
Contents: graphic descriptions of oral m!receiving. Lots of boners lmao. Yeah I know it can get repetitive but the prompt is limiting. 
Alejandro 
You were on base with him. It had been a super slow day but you enjoyed it because your schedules matched up. Most of it had been spent in Alejandro's large office, you two sitting in silence while doing paperwork. You and Alejandro were usually loud but it's days like this that make you certain that you love him. Just peeking over your papers and getting eye contact. The smirk he gives back, the twinkle in his eyes, god it could keep you up for days. Just that image of him.. 
Of course after sitting down for hours you needed to move. He led you to the training area and you had a blast. Training was always more exciting with someone else but it was magical with a man like Alejandro. 
The way his arms flexed when he would lift the weights. The way his thigh muscles could be seen moving in the hip adduction machine. Of course he knew you were staring and he made sure you saw he added your exact weight to his hip thrusts… 
It was the subtle ways Alejandro could seduce you further. He was all talk with many others but these unspoken flirtations were his attempts at showing his attention was purely on you. And you had to admit it worked. 
He scoffed at you when you suggested with a wink that you’d shower together. “Lo siento amor, can't be caught fooling around like that on my own base” He grinned “Though i’ll make sure to grant you your wish next time we’re home, ok?” He winked and you separated to wash off the sweat. 
You didn't say where you’d meet up again. You didn't think much of it but after 2 hours of no Alejandro and waiting at his office you went looking for him. 
Not in the kitchen, not in the common room. He was with Rodolfo in the training area. ..Cute you thought to yourself as you watched them brawl. 
Like a lightbulb lighting over your head you got an idea. Finding a way more mischievous use for the water bottle you held in your hand. 
You snuck up to them, hiding amongst the training equipment. Alejandro had his back turned to you and rodolfo was solely focused on taking the taller man down. “Try to catch me hermano - bet you can’t” Alejandro teased. Rudolfos eyes as usual barked back a louder response than his mouth. His eyes darted over to you as you were nearing your boyfriend. He was a smart man who immediately refocused his eyes back into staring down Alejandro’s. Though now he sported a smirk. “What's with the sudden change in confidence, really think you can intimidate me amigo?” Alejandro spat in a mocking tone. Though shortly his breath hitched and he yelped. You poured your ice cold water all down his back. 
He turned around sulking, slightly shivering due to the drastic temperature change. He had barely started sweating again but his shirt was soaking wet and clung to his strong muscles. He let out a low whine “Por quééééé”  
Rudolfo snickered, now behind Alejandro “ Gracias, Y/n” he tossed his friend a towel, warm by the gym's temperature. 
“Stabbed in the back by my own amor de mi vida” Alejandro dramatically moaned, grabbing his chest in pretend physical pain. You scoffed and kissed him on the cheek. “Feel better now” you held his face in your hands. He pulled you in by your shirt collar and you could feel his forever warm chest up against yours. He went in a bit and licked from your collarbone to your ear lobe. Too distracted to hear Rudolfo silently backing out of the room to give you your privacy. “Maybe, but I'll get my payback sometime baby” He’d whisper before shoving you away playfully.  
After a long day together you ended up on the roof of the base. It was a secret spot that was reserved for just Alejandro - and now you. As unbelievable as it was to you, it was also kept secret from Rodolfo. 
You had taken two thermo containers of coffee / tea out with you. As well as some simple biscuits. But the aura still felt heavy coated in luxury when you looked up towards the sky, in the arms of the man you loved so much. You admired his relaxed face in the pale moonlight. Caught up in massaging his hand you didn't notice he had fallen asleep. Only when you heard the familiar sound of his light snoring, did you go to look at him again in his now slumbing state. He was normally cute, but in his current state he was adorable. 
You initially had no intention of waking him up but that changed when he transformed from a peaceful state to a groaning stirring mess. You were scared that he was having a nightmare and contemplated waking him up. 
That was before you looked down to see a bulge not present before - and heard what was suspiciously horny noise mewling out of his mouth. 
You flushed at the lewd noise. Wanting to help out but after all he seemed more than hesitant to do that stuff on his base. However, this was his secret spot… You slid a hand under the blankets covering you both. Snaking your hand down, pushing his shirt to the side and rubbing the base of his cock with probably a shockingly cold hand. He responded with a little puff of air and a thrust of his hips into your hand. 
His dick was warm and you laughed at using it as a hand warmer. His cock grew harder with each stroke and his eyebrows knitted themself into patterns on his forehead. He wore his focused expression but with closed eyes instead. 
You dragged his pants down, slightly cringing at the thought of his sensitive skin hitting the cool night air. Your solution? Taking as much of him into your mouth and rubbing his thighs trying to keep his warmth. 
Alejandro woke himself up with a guttural groan. He was quick to figure out the situation, he hadn't fallen into deep sleep. His chest rising and falling as he lifted a hand to brush your hair with his fingers. 
“Fuccck cariño, you look espléndido debajo de mí~” he’d be too needy, too cocky to stop himself from thrusting into your throat. Throwing his head back as he did so. 
He wouldn't care how he’d cum. Either cumming on your chest or deep in your throat, it didn't matter. He just wanted his mark on you. 
“Feel better now?” You’d joke and he chuckled, interrupted by distorted breathing. 
After he did catch up with his breath, though, he'd be on you like an animal, smirking in that magical way. 
“ I need you baby, so so bad” He’d hover over you, pulling you into a heavenly makeout session, so close to the stars. 
König
It had started the day before. You had no real way of knowing if König was just busy or if he was, like your gut was telling you, ignoring you. Some days it was just difficult figuring what was happening in that gorgeous covered head walking 2 meters above the ground. 
You didn't always know what was going on inside of his head but you'd give him space if he needed it.
Going to the common kitchen for a hot cup of coffee you saw him pour his own. Taking the time to admire your boyfriend as he was standing out like a sore thumb in the small tea kitchen.
Of course, he'd know you were staring. A soldier in his rank would be dead if he couldn't notice your ogling eyes. But he didn't say anything, just turned on his heel. You thought he’d sit at the small metal table, but no, he stormed out of the room, through the opposite door. Which was further away than the one you just came from, you noted to yourself.
Ok so he was mad. While watching the instant coffee melt, then foam up, you thought of what you could do. It wasn't easy to confront him like this. You two would be texting frequently when either of you was away, but right now you were both here and it felt obnoxious to text him when he was right there.
“Man problems, huh?” You heard the teasing tone of Soap coming up from behind you. 
“How do you know that?” You question him. Staring at him you knew that if HE knew - there was a good chance it ment bad news. 
“Sorry i notice the 2’ meter and hell man running away from his ‘little rodent’ or whatever he calls you' You snort, thinking fondly of the actual nickname your boyfriend called you during the softer moments together. Little mouse, you wanted to be his little mouse in his shirt pocket right about now. It bothered you deeply that he was acting this way, and soaps expression turned slightly less smirky when he saw your expression change. 
“Yeah i don't know he seems upset at me but i don't know why” you sighed. Soap gave you the best advice he had, which was useless anyways. His relationship dynamics not matching yours at all. 
König continued to not even look in your general direction for the rest of the day. You got tired of it and tried to call him before bed. He didn't pick up. You wrote him a message before throwing away your phone and going to sleep. “Hey what's up? Please talk to me König.” Your message was left to read. 
The alarm called its usual warcry at 6 am. You had gotten your hours but felt restless. The situation with König was affecting you more than you thought it would. Especially looking at your phone and seeing that König had not returned anything. He could be really upset if you did not respond to him reaching out. You couldn't blame him for his anxiety but at this moment it felt especially cold. Fuck this, you’d confront him. 
First thing in the morning you had a briefing and Soap was really enjoying this new aura on you. You stayed silent, frustration bubbling underneath your skin. You stood up and left with a loud bang of the chair you were sitting on falling. But you didn't care. You didn't care if Price would view it as a sign of disrespect. That was something you could deal with later, you left for later. 
This time, when you entered the tea kitchen, he was sitting there. Uncharacteristically all of his focus was on his phone. So focused in fact he didn't seem to notice your shadow slowly encompassing his sitting silhouette. 
“König, talk to me.” You commanded but choked on your words, biting the inside of your cheek in exasperation. Tears threatened to escape your eyes when you saw his hood flow in a sigh. He went to stand up but you put a strong hand on his shoulder and prevented him from doing so. He gave an impatient groan in response. 
“Please if i did something wrong at least let me know what” His icey eyes looked up into yours. The staredown that most likely lasted less than half a minute felt like an hour in a snowstorm. You saw the storm under his irises. “Not here” He mumbled, rolling his shoulder to push your hand off but indicated for you to follow when he left the room. 
He led you to his quarters. A route you had not taken in painfully long but knew by heart. The silence on the way there was new though. The only sound was cadettes yelling vaguely in the background, the constant hum of electronics and his heavy footsteps. 
He opened the door for you, the room hitting you with his comfortable smell. But you felt a stranger in the room, you. The way he now stood over you. Awkward position behind the now closed off door. The sound of his heavy footsteps had been replaced by your heartbeats. “So…” You wanted answers. 
He started pacing around the room. Periodically looking in your direction. You let him think. His shoulders dropped and he stood before you. “You.. if you want him more, then just go” He took your hands in his own, brushing his thumbs over your knuckles. 
You paused in partial confusion and disgust. Who was this other man? “König i have no idea what you are talking about” 
He puffed in impatience “Soap. I see the way you look at each other” the silence that followed felt like fire. As much as you wanted to respect the insecurity of your lover you lost it and started hysterically laughing. “SOAP? You can't be serious. I see that idiot as an annoying brother at best!” 
He gave another sigh in annoyance “Please take me seriously y/n. Don't toy with me like this” His eyebrows furrow visibly under the mask. 
“Entschuldigung mein König, didn't mean to make you insecure” You stepped closer. It was comforting to know that his behavior did not stem from him growing to dislike you but you still felt guilty for making him think you had a thing for another man. 
After talking it out with him you had both grown exhausted. He was sitting on his bed, head in his hands. You stood in front of him, taking his hands away and placing soft kisses on his temples. 
“Nap with me, bitte” His eyes blinked tired, the blue orbs staring up into your eyes expectantly. 
You laid together for the first time in what felt like an eternity. The familiar smell of him under his garments and gear. The way he held onto you, made it feel like you were two puzzle pieces joining together perfectly. 
You were the first one to wake up after a couple of sweet hours. You took the time to look at his sleeping face, seeing him so vulnerable, unlike what he shows to everyone else. 
When you shifted to get better access to his face you felt something else. You froze contemplating what to do in this situation, before getting an idea. I’ll show him I'm his, you thought to yourself, a smirk forming on your lips. 
You moved away under the duvet, cringing at the cold air hitting your body. Looking up at him you could see his peaceful expression had changed to one of slight discomfort at the exposure to cold air as well. 
Taking in the sight of this large man, in this large bed. You’d plant kisses starting from how far you could reach when still being straddled just below his hips. As soon as you’d put weight on his crotch he’d sit up, awake and alerted. He’d look puzzled, disheveled his short hair pointing in all different directions. “What,  what are you doing?” He’d question. 
“I'll show you it's only you who I want.” His eyes widened as you pushed him gently into a comfortable resting position again. 
Releasing him from his underwear, you’d hear him start groaning. “Gott I missed this” he’d whine, already too desperate for his own good. 
Starting to stroke his reddening cock, his large hands gripping the sheets. You only hummed as a response, spitting on it to lube it up. 
His breathing was irregular and deep. He was touch starved severely due to most of his life spent in the forces. 
His hands found the back of your head as you decided to take the tip into your mouth. He was impatient, so close already - and not in the mood to wait. He pushed you down, not paying attention to the small gags coming from you. “Gott~” He cursed with his head thrown back. 
He’d cum fast but hard. His body tensed. He’d cum down your throat no questions asked. Though he’d be a bit embarrassed by his behavior as he calmed down. 
He spent the hours following glued to you. Either in bed or around the base. Soap made an effort to disappear as soon as he could hear the familiar Austrian giants footsteps. 
210 notes · View notes
obetrolncocktails · 9 months
Text
Ignition | Danny Wagner X f!Reader X Jake Kiszka | Part 5
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Have you read Part 4?
Warnings: Minors ABSOLUTELY DNI! (18+), SOAKED PANTIES/ UNDERWEAR ALERT, intense sexual tension, unprotected sex, oral f. receiving, teasing, foreplay, fingering, fluff, brief mentions of feelings of inadequacy, graphic descriptions of sex. (YOU AND DANNY FINALLY FAWK).
Word Count: 9,741K
A/N: This might be some of my favorite writing I've done in a while, ESPECIALLY the smut. I tried my best to make this smut seem as realistic as possible to how I think Danny would behave...take that as you will. 😈
Here’s a link to the song mentioned in the fic: Mr. Forgettable—David Kushner
Here’s a link to the Spotify Ignition Playlist: Ignition
“Kenn, I think we might…you know–” you told one of your close friends through facetime.
“Oh?” She asked, taking a sip of her iced latte through the camera. “This is Danny, right? Not Jake?”
“Definitely not Jake,” you insisted. “We haven’t really been talking lately.”
“Oh. What happened?” She asked disappointedly, having been left out of the loop since the last phone call. 
“Well, I finally told him how I felt, and things didn’t really go well. He completely ghosted me for like two weeks until I confronted him at rehearsal, and even now things are really weird. I don’t know,” you shrugged, trying to blow off the hurt that you most definitely still felt. “We haven’t talked,” you shrugged.
“Wait, so you told him you liked him, and he just disappeared?” She asked, slurping loudly through her straw. 
“Yeah,” you said simply, plopping your head down into your covers before lifting it again. 
“Maybe it freaked him out,” Kenn replied. “I don’t know. But that’s weird that he acted like that. Did he tell you if he had feelings or not?”
“He said he didn’t love me like that. He said he’d always be there for me and then literally disappeared off the face of the planet.”
“Damn,” she sighed. “I’m really sorry, Y/n,” She apologized gently. “I really wish I could be there with you. We’d have a sleepover and we’d do the whole ‘eat Ben & Jerry’s and cry’ thing.”
You shrugged, chuckling softly. “Honestly, I think I’m past all that. Danny and I are kind of a thing, now,” you explained. “I don’t know where it’s gonna go, and things are still new, but he’s such a good guy, and he makes me feel–I don’t know,” you blushed. 
“Sexy? Like you’re floating?” She asked, grinning widely. 
“All of the above. And more,” You answered. “Jake will come around eventually, and if he doesn’t, I’ll be sad, but I’ll be okay.”
“Are you sure?” Kenn asked. “You guys are so close, Y/n. I can’t imagine you and Jake just not being a package deal, you know?” 
Her bringing up the obvious made you uncomfortable. She’d asked the questions you’d avoided for weeks. “I miss him, and I’m fucking angry. I never thought he’d act like this, even if he didn’t like me–and now, I just don’t get it.” 
“He hasn’t tried to talk to you? Not at all?” 
You shook your head. “Nope. I yelled at him at rehearsal last week though,” you explained. Kenn snorted. 
“Oh my God. Hell hath no fury like Y/n when she’s pissed off,” She continued. “What did you say?”
“He kept giving me all of these excuses as to why he couldn’t or wouldn’t reach out to me first…that I should have been the first one to reach back out to him knowing I had already put myself out there and got rejected by him. Who does that to their best friend?” 
Kenn shook her head. “A jackass. But like–remember when we were talking, and all the signs were adding up? I swore that he had feelings,” she explained with a confused expression. “Jake wasn’t hard for me to read at all. Every single thing that you told me sounded like he had feelings.” She took another sip of her beverage before shaking the empty cup of ice.  “I had no doubt.”
“Ugh, why are boys so fucking difficult to figure out?!” You groaned, covering your face with your pillow. “Like why did God make me straight? This is sick!”
Kenn chuckled. “All men, I swear, have rocks in their heads.” 
“You’re telling me!” You agreed, your attention moving elsewhere when you felt your phone vibrate as you began receiving a call. It was Danny. 
“Speaking of men, I’ve got a good one calling.”
“I love you, bestie. Keep me updated on Danny. Let me know if I need to kick his ass, too, and I’ll make the trip ASAP.”
“I will, I promise.” 
You hung up with her promptly before switching over the call. 
“Hi,” you said with a smile. 
“Hi gorgeous,” he said through the phone with a delightful tone. “What are you up to?” He asked. 
“Nothing really, just got off the phone with Kenn.” 
“That’s nice, did you guys have a good call?” You nodded, though he couldn’t see you. 
“Yeah, we only get to talk like once or twice a month, so it was nice to catch up.” 
He was quiet for a moment. “Are you in bed yet?” He asked, hope laced into the question. 
“Not even close,” you told him. “Why?” 
“If I tell you, you can’t tell anyone,” he said flirtatiously. 
“I’m sworn to secrecy. Signed by a notary,” you answered playfully. 
“Wow, that’s really official. Truth be told, I have a craving.” 
“A craving?” You asked, grinning. 
“Yup. I figured I’d ask you if you had a craving too, and then, if you would like to possibly fix that craving, maybe perhaps we could carpool to a convenience store…” he said, obviously beating around the bush. 
“Let me see,” you replied. “Oh yeah, you know, I could totally go for a Reese’s right now. I’m fresh out.”
“Oh man, that sucks! But, guess what? I just so happen to have a car!”
“Danny, you know I have a car, too, right?” You chuckled. 
“I had no idea women could drive!” He joked. 
“You deserve to be punched for that,” you told him, raising an eyebrow. 
“Be careful, I like women who are hands on.”
“You’re a loser,” You answered, getting up from the bed, smoothing out your clothes. 
“Your loser, I hope,” he suggested. 
“My loser,” you agreed. 
“I’ll be over in ten then, loser,” he replied quickly, hanging up before you could protest. Soon, you heard his car pull up, his engine purring loudly outside of your window.
“You were just looking for an excuse to see me, weren’t you?” You asked him as you stepped down your front stairs, being careful to not trip over them in the dark. 
“No, of course not! I was just craving some sweet chili Doritos, but was scared to go to the store alone,” he answered, feigning innocence. “Figured I’d call up a buddy.”
“Is that what I am to you, Daniel Wagner?” You asked, ducking down to peer at him through his passenger window. You crossed your arms across your chest. “I’m your buddy?” You lifted your eyebrows skeptically with the question. 
“I have a secret,” he said quietly, pulling his finger upward in a ‘come here’ gesture. 
“What?” You asked. 
“Get in and I'll tell you,” he said with a grin. You eyed him with suspicion, but opened the car door, sinking down into the seat beside him. As soon as you were settled inside, he lifted his hand to tilt your face, leaning his body over the center console to deliver a breathtaking kiss, his fingertips caressing your jaw and the curve of your neck just like before. This kiss was different though, because now, his touch was comfortable and confident. His fingertips knitted into your hair, and yours lifted upward to rest on his shoulder and chest, bunching his shirt in your hands as you deepened the kiss. Adjusting in your seat, you turned your body to him, moving as best you could in such a small space. “Why’d you have to kiss me like that in this tiny fucking car?” You asked breathlessly. 
“Because I like the challenge,” Danny said, licking his lips as he sat back in his seat, his chest heaving. “Plus I’m a glutton for punishment. Oh and I lied about what I was craving,” he added, looking over at you, a glimmer in his eye. 
“Oh?” You answered simply. 
“Yeah. You just fixed it.” At that, your cheeks flamed embarrassingly pink, your skin heating up to the point of almost being feverish.  
“Where did you learn to be so fucking smooth?” You chuckled. He grinned like he had just won something. 
“I’ve got quick wit, Y/n,” he said cleverly. “Also I had to put a lot of practice into impressing you,” he said, flashing his white teeth in a broad smile. 
“You’re such a dork ,” you grinned widely, still feeling the pressure of his lips against yours. Really, you wanted him to go even further, testing your boundaries. 
“Stay over tonight,” you said, laying your head back against the headrest, turning to look at him. “Stay with me,” you told him again, relaxing your expression into one of seriousness. “Please,” you added, placing your opened palm on the center console, waiting for his answer. 
“How’d you feel coming over to my place?” He asked you. “Since we’re still parked in your driveway,” he grinned, looking outside and then back at you. “No pressure, of course.”
“I think I’d like that,” You agreed. “Still up for snacks?” You asked him.
“Nah, not really. It was all a ploy to get you here with me,” he grinned. 
“You know you could have just asked to hang out like a normal person.” You told him with an enthused expression. 
“What would be the fun in that, though? I like to keep you on your toes.” 
You rolled your eyes and reached for the door handle. “Give me five minutes to grab some things,” you told him. The smile that you got in return from him filled you with eagerness and excitement. You practically skipped up the stairs inside your house to pack an overnight bag, a smile embedded in your expression the entire time. 
***
It’s interesting how ceiling fans always become one of the most cliché details in sad, miserable stories,  Jake thought, repetitively tossing one of Danny’s GVF golf balls in the air. He had spent most of the evening lying in place, still dressed in the clothes he wore earlier that day. As he lay, his mind wandered to the image of you and Danny kissing at your house. Once he let himself reimagine it, he’d inserted himself into your arms, imagining if it was him kissing you, him laughing with you, and him sharing his feelings with you. He’d fucked it all up so severely that it was too late to go back now. If he wanted you, he’d have to make a mess, and though Jake hadn’t been one to start drama, losing you wasn’t something he was willing to do. 
“Are you gonna get up and actually do something?” Josh asked, stepping into the room, turning on the light. 
“Ugh!” Jake groaned, rolling over in bed. “Why the fuck are you in my house?” He asked. 
“Because you won’t answer my texts and calls, and quite frankly, it hurt my feelings,” Josh said mostly out of sarcasm. “What’s the problem?”
Jake looked over at his brother, considering if he had the energy to pour out his heart to Josh. Instead, he sighed and looked back up at the spinning fan and continued to toss the ball into the air. 
“Come on,” Josh said. “I can only handle so much brooding before I begin to get jealous from you stealing the limelight.” Jake scoffed with a small grin. 
“You’re an asshat,” he said. 
“I’ll take that as a compliment. Tell me what’s going on. I know who it’s about, at least,” Josh admitted. 
“What do you mean?” Jake said, catching the ball one last time, turning to face his brother. 
“Oh give me a break,” Josh said, coming to sit in the deep papasan chair in Jake’s room, leaning back in it and folding his legs underneath his body. “It’s Y/n. Everyone knows, Jake.” 
“What exactly do they know?” Jake said, reaching his hand back with the ball, spurring Josh to open his hands in preparation to catch the ball. Carefully they tossed it back and forth as they spoke. 
“That you’re an idiot,” Josh began. “Why did you tell her you didn’t have feelings for her? Like, what kind of bullshit was that?” He continued. “You and I both know you’ve been crazy about her since you met her.”
Jake caught the ball and sighed deeply before tossing it back. “I don’t know. I panicked in the moment,” he said. “Nothing ever ends well for me. She’s my best friend. Everyone says don’t fall in love with your best friend, and when she told me she had feelings for me, I just wanted to run away, I–” He shook his head, fumbling for the ball and missing it, watching as it hit the wall with a loud thwack. 
“Shit,” He said, inspecting the wall for damage. 
“Come in the kitchen for shots,” Josh suggested. “I’ll steal your casamigos,” he grinned. “Let’s talk.” 
“I don’t feel like talking,” Jake argued. 
“Well, that’s what you’ve been doing, Jackass. Now get off your ass and talk to me, or I’ll become your worst nightmare.”
“You’ve been that way since we were born,” Jake grinned slightly, rolling off of his bed. 
“And I don’t plan on stopping anytime soon, either,” Josh finished. “Come on.” 
***
“Got everything you need?” Danny asked as you placed your bag on the floor board. He reached his hand over to squeeze your thigh. You nodded with a gentle smile. 
“I think so,” You said, buckling your seatbelt, and offering Danny a gentle smile.   
“Still feel like coming over?” He asked you. “No pressure.”
“Danny, I promise. I want to,” you assured him, reaching over and kissing him on the lips. “I want to stay with you.” 
“Okay,” he said in a low murmur, grinning softly. “Okay.” 
The drive to his house was quiet, but content, his right hand clasped with yours as you rested it on your thigh. You looked out at the night lights as Danny’s music played softly through the car. Danny lived on the other side of town, but much closer to downtown than you’d remembered. Since the boys moved to Nashville, you hadn’t really spent time at his house. Usually, band meetings, rehearsals and get-togethers would take place at Jake’s or Josh’s depending on who was feeling like hosting at the time. Coming here to Danny’s felt like an exciting new adventure. 
“You’re quiet over there,” he said after a while, pulling you from your thoughts. 
“Oh, I was just thinking,” You told him, squeezing his hand and offering him a small smile. 
“Everything alright?” He asked, stealing quick glances at you. 
“Yeah, It’s just–I can’t remember when I was at your house last. I don’t know if I’ve even been inside,” you said honestly. 
“Well, I can guarantee you, it looks just like a house on the inside,” He winked at you. “I’ve got a couch, a fridge–ooh and even a bed, if that surprises you,” he winked, turning into his neighborhood. 
“You better watch it,” You told him. “I’ll start holding it against you,” you grinned. “And you don’t want me to do that.”
“I don’t?” He grinned, raising an eyebrow. “And what exactly would my punishment entail?” Danny asked. 
“I’ll spank you,” you warned him, narrowing your eyes with determination. 
“You’re gonna spank me?” He asked through a chuckle, pulling into his driveway. 
“Don’t tempt me, Wagner. Your height, stature and masculinity means nothing to me.”
“Be careful what you say in tight spaces, sweetheart.”
“Why’s that?” You asked, feigning innocence. 
“Because you just might get more than you bargained for.”
“Is that a challenge?” You asked, reaching for the door handle. 
“It’s a promise,” he said, stepping out of his car and coming around to you, swiftly reaching up underneath you, pulling you upward.
“Danny!” You practically squealed. 
“Up you go!” He said playfully, letting you dangle over his shoulder. Figuring you needed to even the score, you reached back and slapped his ass as hard as you could as he marched up his driveway. 
“Ow!” he yelped, stepping up to his porch. 
“And eye for an eye!” You told him with a chuckle. 
After the playful moment, he carefully swung you back down on your feet and reached for his keys in his pocket, unlocking the door, and opening it for you. “Come on in,” he said, letting you walk past him into the dimly lit foyer of the house. It was decorated with modern taste, with beautiful wood floors installed throughout the entire house. It was an open concept, breathing life into the space, with thoughtful decorations that were most definitely hand picked by Danny throughout the time of being in Nashville. 
In the corner, you saw his golf bag, the clubs sticking out of it at different angles, like he had recently played. 
“I should take you some time,” he grinned, following your gaze. “I’d love to see your form,” He said. “Think you could keep up?” 
“No, I’d be absolutely awful at it,” you admitted, looking up at him. “But, you know what I would be really good at?”
“Mm, what’s that?” He asked. 
“I’d be wonderful at sitting on the golf cart, giving you a big ol’ clap when you make a good shot, and then handing you a fresh beer every now and then.” 
“That’s because you’re dependable, sweetheart,” He said, bending to kiss you on the top of your head. The flirtatious conversation had left you fighting a swarm of butterflies, the pet names making your heart practically swell in your chest. 
“Are we gonna spend the entire evening doing this?” You asked, the corner of your mouth quirking up with playfulness. 
“Doing what?” He asked, stepping into the kitchen and reaching into his refrigerator for a cold bottle of wine. You watched his arms muscles flex as he reached up into the cabinets to retrieve two wine glasses. 
“Flirting with me constantly with no end in sight?” You asked, stepping toward him.
“Is it a crime to flirt with a beautiful woman?” He asked, pouring a glass of wine.
“It is when it drives me fucking crazy,” you said matter of factly, watching as he casually shook the curls from his head. 
“Well in that case,” he said, setting down the full glass, pushing it back on the counter. “Let me make it worse,” he said as he took the last step forward, his hands finding their way to your hips. His face hovering just above yours, and his eyes floated over the curve of your lips, his nose resting perfectly alongside yours. “How about now?” He asked again, his voice barely above a whisper. 
“I think you should kiss me, Danny Wagner,” you told him. “Now.” 
“I like it when you get annoyed with me. This is new,” he grinned. Leaning in slowly, he placed his lips on yours and delivered a delicate kiss, but it wasn’t enough. You wanted more of him. You pressed yourself firmly against him, feeling him reciprocate with stronger urgency, his lips folding in time with yours as you inhaled his scent, knotting your fingers into his curls and tugging. He groaned softly into the kiss, his hands moving downward to grab at your ass as he turned around with you, walking you back against the counter. You felt his hot breath expel against your skin, his slick lips beginning to wander from your mouth, down to the hollow of your neck. He took your earlobe in between his teeth and pressed down, pulling away just enough to elicit a soft hiss from you. He chuckled sexily, his curls tickling your face as he leaned into the crook of your neck, touching his lips to what he thought was the perfect spot. You felt his teeth, then felt the vacuum from him sucking on your skin, leaving a hickey for the next day. “So everyone knows that you belong to someone. To me.” It was bliss to be wrapped up with Danny, and he ensured that you’d feel like the only woman he could see. You felt the small welt pulse 
“Danny, take me to bed,” you whispered as he kissed you. 
“Are you sure?” He asked, pulling away from you to look into your eyes. 
“Let’s just lay together,” you decided to say, knowing you most definitely wanted more, but not sure if it was the right moment or not. 
“Okay,” he said gently with a smile, reaching for your hand. You walked through the house as he led you to his bedroom, having completely forgotten about the wine. He would need no liquid courage tonight. He was already becoming drunk off of you. 
***
“Show me your favorites,” Danny asked in bed with you cuddling him, your head resting on his chest. He’d been swiping through several of his Spotify playlists, playing snippets of several different songs, but never fully committing to playing the whole song through—you’d assume he’d tried to avoid the opportunity for awkwardness. It was amusing to you how he could be so effortlessly effervescent one moment, and then so reserved and bashful the next.
“Play me a full song that you love,” you redirected. “One that you know I won’t know,” you said, turning your head to look up at him. “I just wanna listen. Can be anything.” His fingertips paused. 
“Alright,” he agreed softly, scrolling through his music before stopping at one song called ‘Mr. Forgettable,’ by David Kushner. You watched his thumb hover over the song, hesitating before swiping away. 
“No wait,” you stopped him by touching his arm. “Play me that one.”
“Oh. Okay,” he said, his tone rising lightly with hesitation. You watched as he pressed play, sitting the phone on his belly and laying back. In the low light of his bedroom, you closed your eyes and listened. 
I know that you're waiting for me like a dog But have some patience for the part of me that's lost There's been a hundred times When I don't recognize Any of you that love me I try to memorize and identify But it's all getting foggy My head is in the clouds right now Just pray I come around, around Hello, hello, are you lonely? I'm sorry, it's just the chemicals Hello, hello, do you know me? I'm called Mr. Forgettable  Mr. Forgettable
You listened quietly as you rested on his chest, finding it just so that his heart thumped to the beat of the song. Every now and then, you’d feel a vibration against your ear as he hummed his favorite parts. It was a sad song with a cheerful beat, which you found quite ironic considering its content. Once it was over, you let the silence linger for a few moments before tilting your head to look up at him. 
“Do you feel like that?” You asked him softly, your throat aching. His eyes drifted from the phone screen to your eyes, then your lips and then back up again. He swallowed once.
“Sometimes,” he answered honestly. 
“You feel like you’re forgettable?” You pushed further, propping yourself up on your elbow. 
“It’s okay, really,” he said with a gentle smile, though he wouldn’t look you in the eye. “I’ve felt like that most of my life,” he sighed.
“Danny…” you started, watching as his cheeks pinkened with embarrassment. “You’ll never be forgettable to me.” You placed your hand on his chest and his eyes softened as he looked down at you, his lips pulling into a flat line as his expression grew more serious. “Let me prove to you that you’re becoming everything to me,” You said, lifting your hand to his cheek, watching as his eyes lowered to your mouth. You moved closer to him, your bodies fitting together perfectly as he rolled into you, kissing you tentatively at first, as if testing your boundaries. “It’s okay,” you whispered into the space between you. 
Danny moved to press himself against you, his weight adding a welcome sense of comfort as his hands moved around your body, his fingertips pressing into your skin. “More,” you huffed against his lips. “I trust you.” 
“You do?” He asked, pausing for just a moment.
 “I want more of you, Danny. Please.” His hands move reflexively for the hem of your shirt, and you lifted your arms over your head as he pulled it off of you, tossing it to the side. His hand snaked up your bare skin, his fingertips dipping under the cup of your bra as he kissed you. You felt his touch as he moved his hand around your body, his teeth nipping and tugging at your bottom lip as his tongue danced expertly with yours. Slowly, he released his nervous and patient apprehension, gladly appeasing your request. You reached your hand down where he had paused, pulling his hand upward to hold your breast, guiding him with your hand on top of his. His grip tightened around your breast, his thumb grazing your swelling nipple, a soft, breathy chuckle escaping from his nose as he moved over the bud again, igniting a layer of goosebumps all over your body. Softly, you moaned into his mouth, reaching your hands down to cup his clothed cock, finally realizing how well-endowed he was. You walked your fingertips upward and unzipped his pants, nimbly unfastening the button closure with two fingers, reaching just inside and immediately felt the heat emanating from him. 
Slowly, you walked your fingers down his lower belly and smoothed them over his bulge. His length hardened beneath your touch, and you could feel him tense and then release. You felt his grip tighten around your breast in response as he moved to flip you so that you were on top of him. Rising from him, you moved your hair out of the way to one side and lowered yourself back down, kissing him deeply. Closing your eyes, you intentionally ground your hips against his firm cock, feeling your own muscles begin to contract and release as they silently begged for his attention. 
“You’re such a tease,” he breathed through a sexy smirk, reaching up to unclasp your bra. 
“I’ve said it before, Danny. I’m full of surprises,” you murmured under your breath, your tone heavy with desire. “I’m not always the innocent girl you think I am,” you told him. 
“Then drag me to hell.” He let your bra slip off of your skin, falling onto his belly. He tossed it to the end of the bed before bringing his eyes up to your chest. 
“Jesus,” he groaned again, and you smirked down at him, watching as his eyes widened for a moment before slipping into a lustful expression, his hands moving to squeeze them firmly in his hands, his thumbs moving instantly to rub over your nipples, biting at his bottom lip when they swelled to their full, aroused state. 
“Like what you see?” You asked him, resting your hands on his sides. 
“You’re so fucking beautiful, Y/n. How could you not know how incredibly gorgeous you are?” He asked, moving his fingertips to smooth over your bare sides and belly. 
“I could say the same thing about you,” you admitted. “I’ve wanted you for a while, Danny.”
“I’ve wanted you for years,” he added. “I have to admit,” he started, but paused. 
“What?” You asked, raising your eyebrows. 
“I’ve imagined what it would be like to be with you,” he explained. You watched as his cheeks flushed. 
“You have?” You asked him, beginning to grind your hips against him slowly as he spoke. You watched his expression shift slightly as you felt his cock press against your ass through his unzipped pants. 
“So many times,” he admitted quietly, reaching his hands to your hips. He pulled you down further against himself, lifting his hips to grind against your ass. 
“You’ve definitely been on my mind too,” you told him. 
“Oh?” He asked. 
“Mmhmm. Usually late at night when I can’t sleep,” you continued. “My thoughts wander…”
“And what do they come up with?” He asked, whispering his fingertips over your belly, making you shiver from his ghosting touch. 
“Usually they’re thoughts of you,” you explained. “Naked.” 
“And what exactly am I doing in these thoughts?” He asked, the corner of his mouth tilting with interest. 
“You’re with me,” you answered, echoing his touch, walking your fingertips up his belly, taking note of the dark wisps of hair that adorned his chest. Not too much, not too little, just right. He was masculine, but sensitive and understanding, and that duality had the power to drive you absolutely insane. 
“Why’s it so hard for you to say, Y/n?” Danny asked, bringing his hand down to meet yours, interlacing your fingers together. “What were we doing?” His confidence, though so understated and reserved before now settled into a presence that was simultaneously charming and incredibly sexy.
“We were—you know,” you responded sheepishly, looking up into his eyes. 
“Fucking?” He asked quietly, his brown dilating with interest. You nodded yes, but the images in your mind were racing: you bouncing on his cock, your hair falling loose and wild over your breasts, your mouth dropped open in ecstasy as he railed into you. “You’re imagining it right now, aren’t you?” He asked, his lips drawing upward in a crooked line. 
You didn’t answer him. The heat in your face and averted gaze told him everything you needed to know. He chuckled softly, “look at me,” he commanded, and you did, turning your gaze downward. “I would be lying if I said I haven’t imagined the same thing,” he admitted. 
The space between you and him was thick with need and anticipation. “Danny…” you said after a moment. “Are we moving too fast?” You asked him. 
“Do you think we are?” He turned the question around. “Listen,” he said gently. “ I’ve waited for you for over two years. I can wait as long as you need.” You smiled down at him, biting your bottom lip as you took notice of how sexy it felt to have a man so considerate and understanding as your own. Slowly, you moved off of his lap, laying down and cuddling against him, lying in the crook of his arm. 
“I really, really like you Danny. 
“And I really, really, really like you, Y/n,” he responded with a smirk, looking down at you as you tilted to look up at him. 
You echoed his expression. “Kiss me,” you told him. With his free hand, he tilted your head upward by your chin and leaned slightly to place his supple lips on your own. He was so gentle and tender, taking his time as he kissed you. “Let’s slow things down a bit,” he said, smiling against your lips. “Hm?”
“Mmhmm,” you breathed against his kiss, lifting your hand to rest on his cheek, your fingertips dancing upon the curls that dance upon the curve of his ear. His tongue looped around yours, hot puffs of breath exchanging between your mouths. You kicked at the sheets and covers bunched around your legs, and wrapped one around Danny as you lay with him. In his arms, you felt infinitely beautiful, and more importantly, you felt important and valuable. 
***
“Thank you,” you said after a long while. 
“For what?” He chuckled softly. 
“Just for being you. For being just…incredible,” you told him, feeling your pulse thumping through your chest. “For being my person.” 
“You’re my person,” he said, taking your hand in his, kissing it. “And I have a question for you,” he continued. 
“What is it?” 
You watched his Adam's apple bob up and down for a moment before he finally spoke. “Will you be my girlfriend?” He asked, squeezing your hand softly. 
You paused for a moment, a bright smirk growing on your face. “Do you think you can handle me full-time?” You asked him expectantly. 
“Honey, I crave it,” he told you. “All of you. Every day. The silly things, the important things…the happiest things and the saddest ones too. So yes, I think I can handle you. Should I ask you the same question?” 
“Danny, you’re probably the lowest-maintenance man I’ve ever dated,” you explained with a soft grin. “You’re just so– easy.” you landed on the word, and it felt right because it was true. “I don’t think I’ll ever have to worry about what you’re thinking or feeling. So yes, Danny. I think I can definitely handle you. I want you–full time,” you smirked. 
 ***
You’d both let the evening settle, resting on Danny’s chest until, when it became too hot, you’d turned in the other direction, fluffing Danny’s pillows and settling yourself back to sleep. You’d been restless, tossing and turning in bed. It wasn’t Danny’s fault; ever since you were young, you were plagued with being a hot sleeper, ending up kicking off the tangle of sheets and covers toward the end of the bed. Once you’d fallen asleep, images of Danny filled your mind, just like they had before, of him touching you and making love to you after you’d given your body to him completely. In your drowsiness, you’d grown increasingly annoyed with the layer of sweat that had begun to stick to your body, pasting the bottom sheet to your underside. As you rolled around, you uttered sleepy ‘sorries’ to Danny, who moved sleepily to touch you and kiss you before turning over again. You drifted between dreams for the next few hours until you’d roused yourself fully awake again, unable to coax yourself back to sleep. Rubbing at your burning eyes, you rolled out of bed as quietly as possible, trying your best to not bother Danny asleep beside you. He lay fast asleep as you watched him for a moment, tiptoeing around the bed as you moved toward the door. 
The house was dark, save for a small lamp in the living room and the recessed LEDs underneath the cabinets in the kitchen. Opening the cabinets, you searched for the glasses, finding one and stepping toward the fridge, using the water dispenser to fill up the cup. You moved to ice next, hoping that it wouldn’t create much noise, but you were so wrong. Several pieces of ice tumbled out, hitting the sides of your glass and knocking out of the freezer tumbling to the floor.
“Shit,” you said to yourself, bending to pick up the ice cubes, kicking the few strays that you couldn’t reach under the freezer, smiling to yourself while imagining Danny’s grin if you had confessed that you were one of those people. 
“Couldn’t sleep?” 
You jolted, almost dropping your glass of water when you heard his voice. Turning around, you saw Danny stepping into the kitchen, his eyes heavy-lidded, dressed in nothing but thin, black boxers. God-fucking-damn, you thought to yourself, feeling your core activate with need. You squeezed your thighs closer together, clearing your throat.
“Oh,” you began. “Yeah, sorry. I got really hot and couldn’t sleep.” Danny stepped closer to you, his bare chest and shoulders illuminated in the low light as he stopped to lean against the counter beside you, crossing his arms across his chest. 
“Don’t apologize,” he said softly. “Truth be told, I couldn’t sleep, either.”
“You’re such a liar,” you said with a grin. “You were gone when I got up. Didn’t even move.”
“That’s because I was pretending,” he grinned. 
“What do you mean?” you asked, looking at him skeptically. 
“I was thinking about you,” he admitted.
You could have cursed him for having such a sultry gaze in the moment, coming up with something smart or clever to say in response, but this time he had entranced you, moving you to silence. He watched you for a long moment as you swallowed and set down your glass of water. 
“You okay?” He asked you. 
“I’m fine,” you answered him, deciding in the moment that you wanted him in every meaning of the word. You stepped closer to him. “Danny.”
“Y/n.” He answered, his hands uncrossing to fall at your sides, caressing your hips as you stepped into his space. “I think,” you began, mustering the courage and honesty to finally say “I want you to take me to bed–and I don’t mean to sleep.”
He paused for a moment, raising his eyebrows, nodding slowly. “Are you sure?” he asked. 
“I’m sure,” you answered, reaching down for his hands. “Please. I want to know every part of you,” you alluded. “Take me to bed, Danny.”
“Yes ma’am,” he said quietly, leaning forward to place one delicate, but tender kiss on your lips. Squatting slightly, his hands moved behind you, reaching behind your knees to hike you up easily, carrying you silently through the house and into his bedroom. With your arms around him, you felt safe and secure. The moment filled you with excitement and nervousness too, and you no longer felt the insecurities from earlier in the evening. As he moved with you through the threshold of the bedroom, Danny skillfully swung the door shut with his foot and stepped toward the end of the bed where the covers lay unkempt and tangled. Holding you securely with one hand, he pulled the sheets and comforter off of the bed, letting it fall to the floor. Gently, he leaned forward and laid you on your back, staying close for a moment. “If at any time,” he murmured gently, “you feel uncomfortable or you want to stop, you tell me, okay?” You watched as his gaze swept between your eyes, waiting for you to respond. “It’s just us, together. I want it to be perfect,” he explained, bringing his thumb upward to caress your cheek. 
“Me too,” you nodded. “Danny please,” you continued. You appreciated how sweet he was, but the heat and stimulation in between your thighs was starting to become unbearable. 
“Don’t worry,” he said with a flirtatious wink before lowering off of you, reaching underneath your oversized sleep shirt to pull at the waistband of your panties, rolling them down off of you. You watched as his head lowered, and his dark curls swept over your lower belly, tickling your skin. Gently, he placed a soft, velvety kiss on the lines from the waistband that had dug impressions into your skin. Glancing up at you through dark lashes with an eager grin, he rolled your underwear down further, exposing your last vestige of privacy–and yet, beneath his heavy gaze, you felt inexplicably radiant. He looked at you like exquisite, cherished art–like something to behold and to protect–or like how a well-learned sculptor gazes at a monolithe of marble, his mind chipping away the extra pieces to reveal the masterpiece beneath it all. 
“I’ll never get tired of that,” you smiled down at him. 
“Of what?” He asked. 
“The way you look at me.” 
He smiled gently, the apples of his cheeks rising. His arms moved to hook around your legs as he repositioned you, spreading them slightly so he could place more soft kisses on your tender, warm skin. 
“Danny,” you half-whined, feeling restless as he continued to litter your skin with tender kisses. 
“I will,” he answered, predicting your thoughts. “It may be three A.M., but I’m perfectly fine with taking my time with you.” With that, he shut you up and you laid back tossing your hair around you as you watched him take charge below. 
“Just relax,” he told you, adjusting himself between your legs one last time before unhooking one of his hands from around you to part your folds. You should have been embarrassed by the mess you’d already made. You should have fought to keep your legs closed so that he didn’t see how wet you were, but you didn’t. You lifted your head slightly to watch him, his eyes brightening with lust as he saw your open pussy for the first time. “Oh my God,” he murmured almost inaudibly, sliding his thumb into your slick, applying soft pressure to your skin as he touched you for the first time. You felt yourself humming softly, perhaps to break the slight awkwardness you felt, but you stopped as soon as he moved to your clit, pressing the meat of his thumb over the rise, puffing a soft chuckle through his nose in response to your body’s reaction. His fingers had to have been dripping from how turned on he’d made you, yet he made no mention of it. He was silent and focused as his fingers rubbed into you. 
“Still good?” He asked you quietly, and you nodded down at him. 
“More,” you huffed through a whisper, and you watched with great anticipation as he answered your request by ducking his head down, introducing the wet warmth of his tongue as he tasted you for the first time. You felt the gentle puffs of his breath against your thighs, adding to the heat against your skin. And there he was, all over you at once, his tongue lapping at your folds with learner’s curiosity as he traveled the expanse of your pussy, the flat of his tongue dragging along your most sensitive areas just once before moving elsewhere. “Fuck,” you murmured softly, bringing your hands to your breasts, squeezing them through the thin cotton of your tshirt. In response, Danny pressed his face firmly against you, the curvature of his nose pressing into your skin, igniting even more pleasure. Moments later, he began to shake his head back and forth, creating a feeling of undulation against your swollen clit. “Fuck me–oh my god, Danny,” you groaned, reaching down to take a fistful of his hair, pulling him against you and then away when you became overstimulated. Coming up for air with a heavy gasp, you caught a glimpse of his face in the low light of the room, pinkened with exertion and friction. “Come here,” you commanded breathlessly. 
He rose from in between your legs and laid down on top of you, dropping one of his hands back down to your pussy as he leaned in to kiss you, his lips and tongue laced with your own taste. The kiss was fiery and passionate, his lips pressing and pulling at your own as you moaned in response to the movement of his fingers. His face was slick, both with your slick and his perspiration. You could feel his hardness against your belly, your core thumping with anticipation for what was to come. 
“Let’s get this thing off of you,” he grinned, pulling away to tug at the hem of your shirt, lifting his body long enough to slip it off over your head and toss it in the room. He returned to your naked body, his hands smoothing over your breasts and erect nipples. As if he couldn’t resist, he lowered his head, lolling his tongue in loose, wet circles around each swollen bud, suckling and pulling on them. You lifted your hands to his bare shoulders, running your fingertips over the expanse of his back. His skin was so soft, yet his muscles so incredibly strong. 
“Please,” you groaned louder, lifting his face with your hands. “Danny please,” you looked into his deep, chocolate eyes. 
“Please what?” He had the nerve to tease, his breath wisping against your face. “Please what, Y/n?” He asked, his tone looping sugar-sweet into your ears. 
“Please–fuck me,” you finally begged, telling him the words he wanted to hear. “I need you inside of me, now. I need you–” he placed his pointer finger against your lips. 
“You won’t ever have to beg me to fuck you,” he murmured, pulling stray pieces of hair from your face and setting them to the side. In the darkness of the room, his features were cast in a natural blue hue, the sharp lines of his face exaggerated in the contrasting, dark shadows of the evening. He began to move, placing more kisses on each breast, down your sternum and belly before moving off of you. “Do you want to take these off?” Danny asked quietly, standing from the bed. As you sat up, you saw how obvious his erection had become through the crotch of his boxers. 
“Do I turn you on, Danny?” You asked him, looking up from below. He didn’t respond, only gazed down at you with an intensity that needed no further explanation. Hooking your fingers into the waistband of his underwear, you rolled them down slowly, taking notice of his prominent happy trail, which led lower and lower as you revealed more of him. Exhilaration rippled over your body as his skin grew paler, another sign of private vanity that you were becoming introduced to. Slowly, you pulled his boxers down, revealing inch by inch his length, springing free. You let his underwear drop to the ground and let him step out of them, kicking them to the side. Taking his cock in your hand, you felt his incredible warmth as you began to stroke it slowly. He heaved a relieved sigh, blood rushing downward as he swelled to full erectness.
“I’ve imagined this for so long,” he murmured. “But this is so much better,” he chuckled softly. You grinned up at him and began to move faster, stroking up and down along the length of his cock, enjoying when he tilted his hips forward in response, silently asking for more. He didn’t indulge, though. “Let me take care of you,” he said quietly, taking his cock in his own hand, backing away from you. “Lay down, sweetheart.” 
You moved toward the end of the bed, resuming a similar position as before, and waited for him to take over. You felt the mattress depress gently as he crawled onto the bed, his hands lifting to spread your legs once more. Reaching up over your head, he grabbed a pillow. “Lift up,” he said gently, and when you did, he slid a pillow under your head. 
“You’re literally perfect,” you chuckled. He smiled, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your forehead. 
“Far from it,” he admitted. “But I wanted this to be,” he finished. Somehow he always knew what to say that would send you further into arousal. He parted your legs again and walked on his knees as he positioned himself just in front of your heat. You looped one of your legs around him as he stroked himself firm once more before guiding his hips forward, pressing his pink tip against your pussy with his tumblr, sliding his length against your clit by rocking his hips slowly back and forth. His hardness felt incredible, stimulating your body to respond by lurching your hips upward in an effort to take more pleasure from him. He did this for a few more passes before pausing to collect your wetness on the tip of his cock. “Are you ready?” he asked in a quiet, sultry tone. 
You nodded quickly, widening your legs. “Yes, Danny please.” Placing his right hand on the mattress at your side to ground himself, he used his dominant hand to guide himself into your entrance, pressing his hips forward to penetrate you for the first time. You gasped quietly, biting down on your bottom lip as your brows furrowed from the slight discomfort of adjusting to his girth. “Fuck,” he uttered, shaking the messy curls out of his face, pressing himself deeper inside of you. You squeezed your core muscles on him, beginning to enjoy the feeling of him filling you up and stretching you further. 
“Come here,” you murmured, reaching for his arms to pull him down. His face had slackened, his features working through a variety of sensations. He moved lower, snaking his arms underneath you as he pulled you in for a passionate kiss, rocking his hips back and forth as he slid deeper inside. His breath was heavy, expelling into your open mouth as you closed your eyes and let your head fall back against the pillow. Your hands reached for his shoulders, squeezing them before smoothing down his back. You pressed your fingertips into his skin, mimicking the rhythm he’d assumed before. Though the sensations felt wonderful, you needed him to go faster. “Faster,” you whispered. He looked down at you unblinking as he repositioned himself for a moment before quickening his pace, your breasts bouncing freely as your body popped off of his thighs. After a moment, he walked himself off of you and sat up, taking hold of your hips. With this angle, he’d have the leverage to give you exactly what you had asked for. Using your weight, he pulled your hips forward and popped himself forward, jutting his cock deep inside of you, causing a breathless moan to escape from your lips, your eyes rolling back involuntarily as your body ignited inside and out. “Oh my God,” you groaned deeply, taking hold of your breasts and squeezing them while he continued to buck himself into you, listening to the rhythmic clap of your thighs making contact over and over. 
“Better than I could have ever,” he breathed, reaching up to wipe at his sweaty face, “ever imagined.” His smile was infectious, his gaze fully attentive and loving. You reached up to touch his face, your thumb caressing his cheek in the darkness. He tilted his head to kiss your palm, walking his hand down in between your thighs, fingering your clit. “Oh–shit!” you practically shouted, arching your back off of the bed, squeezing as tightly as you could on his cock. “Danny!” 
His slammed himself into you in response to your moans, hot beads of sweat rolling down his face, nose and down his chest. “You’re perfect, Y/n,” he mewled, reaching forward to squeeze your breast. “Perfect tits, perfect ass, perfect fucking pussy,” he grunted, tweaking and pulling on your nipple as he slowed his thrust momentarily, backing himself almost all the way out of you before letting his weight send him back forward again, filling you up completely. “I feel you all around me, baby,” he said in a low, lustful tone. You responded by tensing around him once more, getting closer and closer to climax with each successive thrust. 
“Danny, I’m getting close–” you told him, your voice rising higher and higher, heavy with exertion.
“I know you are, sweetheart,” he responded. “Come here,” he said, reaching for your hands. He pulled you upward and wrapped his arms around you so that you were now in his lap with your legs wrapped around him. “I want you to bounce,” he explained. “And I want to feel you cum all over my cock,” he whispered into the curve of your ear. “Don’t be afraid to lose control. I’m here with you. We’re together, just like we should be.” His skin stuck to yours as you began to move. In any other circumstance you would have been miserable being this hot, but in this case, you welcomed it, wanting to be covered in Danny in any and every way imaginable. You wanted to be his in word and in action. As you worked on his cock, his hands moved to your ass, kneading and spreading it as he pulled you flush against his cock, his entire length buried deep inside of you. Disembodied moans and grunts escaped from your throat as your muscles trembled around him. You threw your hands around him, your fingertips combing through his dark ringlets, tugging at them, while your other hand moved along the expanse of his back, your fingers digging carelessly into his perfect skin. 
He hissed in reaction, tilting his head downward to see if he could find the hickey he had left earlier in the evening. When he couldn’t find it in the darkness, he decided he didn’t care to leave only one. He sucked harshly into your skin, his teeth nipping and pulling as he fucked himself up into you, the room thickening with the entrancing odor of sex. 
“Ah!” you yelped loudly, throwing your head upward. He took the narrow, well-timed moment to strike his cock into you as deep as he could. Before you could control yourself, a blast of white light fielded your vision, pulling you upright in a rigid stasis, your floor muscles tightening around him as firmly as you could. Your body quivered intensely as you seized for several silent, agonizing seconds. His arms pulled around you as he left himself anchored inside of you, his hips swinging slowly back and forth. His length pushed against the furthest boundary between ecstasy and agony, sending your hips whipping forward unconsciously. He was rock-hard inside of you, though you could hear him breathing erratically against you. 
“Let go, Y/n. Let go completely,” he urged you, tilting your head to the side so he could kiss you. “I’m not afraid of messes,” he said casually. “We’ll handle it later in the shower,” he said, pressing his lips to yours. “So, let go.” You closed your eyes and relaxed, letting him slowly begin to fuck into you again. This time, he strokes were excruciatingly slow, unsheathing himself almost completely before sending himself forward. “Do it again. Cum with me,” he spoke after a few moments, his voice shifting into one of more urgency. “Let’s cum together.” 
You nodded quickly. “Fuck me hard, Danny. Please.” Your whimpers filled the quiet room, and he obeyed immediately, lifting you up by your hips and slamming  you back down on his cock as he used what little leverage he had to pop himself up into you. 
“Squeeze,” he ordered, firmly slapping your ass. You moaned from the sharp pain, but sank further into ecstasy as you followed his command, tightening your core muscles around his length and resisted from letting go. 
“Fuck!” he groaned. “That’s fucking perfect,” he grunted. “I’m so close,” he told you. You nodded and moved with him. But decided to change positions slightly, pushing on his chest. 
“Lay back,” you told him, and he did, letting go of you. He laid back against the bed, and rested with his hands behind his head. Holding on to his sides, you moved to rest on your knees, undulating your hips against his, swiveling them and dragging yourself up and down against his length. 
“Oh my fucking God,” he groaned, watching you as you worked on him, feeling the all-too-familiar sensation swelling in your core. You would have grinned down at him, but your body reserved all resources to focus on the frenzy that claimed your body. 
“Danny,” you moaned his name, pressing down on his belly as you ground your hips against him. 
“I know, baby,” he spoke. “Come here,” he said, reaching for your hands. You lay on top of him, prepared to continue your movement, but he gave one last direction. “Squat on my cock, and lay your head on my shoulder.”
“I’m not that flexible,” you told him in the moment. 
“Just trust me,” he said, moving his hands to your sides, bending your legs. You moved to appease his request, situating yourself into a squat, and then laid your upper body back down, resting your head on his shoulder. You knew that your thighs would burn as a consequence, but he felt so good that it was all worth it. Before you could question further, Danny used the spring of the mattress and his strong hands on your hips to drive his cock into you as quickly as possible, gaining more depth with the open space between himself and your opening. “Take it,” he grunted. “Take all of it.” His voice was clipped, heavy with exhaustion, and you knew he was close. Your inner thighs quivered from the proximity of the incoming orgasm. 
Your jaw fell slack, opening as you began to let yourself finally lose control again. Danny’s face was streaked with perspiration as he began to lapse in momentum. “I’m close–” he blurted after a few moments. “I’m gonna cum,” he said again, increasing his pace. You squeezed and squeezed harder, unsure if you were going to be able to reach orgasm again. In the last moment of insecurity, your body got you there, sending heat exploding through your body. “I’m gonna–” he repeated again and again like a vigil before finally, himself, letting go, moaning loudly and hissing through his teeth as the same agonizing pleasure ripped through his own body. You lowered yourself to him as your core exploded, and pressed your body to his, wrapping your arms and legs around him as he pumped his hot seed into you, his hot breath looping around your ears and down your neck as you tensed around him for the last few times. 
You lay there with him, your chests heaving simultaneously. He kissed you deeply, his tongue folding softly with yours as he held you, still mounted inside of you. After a moment, you lifted your head to look at him, and he did the same. You couldn’t help the grin that grew at the corners of your lips. A belly laugh escaped your mouth as you laid back down beside him. 
“What?” He asked with a smirk, rolling on his side. 
“That was fucking incredible,” you admitted. “I never realized that when people talked about witching hour, they meant this…” you grinned, plopping against the pillows. 
“Witching hour doesn’t exist. Those moans everyone talks about? Those aren’t witches. They’re people fucking,” Danny grinned, his white teeth glowing in the darkness. 
“Agh, shut up!” You laughed, reaching for a pillow and slamming it into him. 
“I’m just telling the truth!” he teased, stealing the pillow. 
Stepping off of the bed, he reached his hand downward silently toward you. You looked at it then back up at him. 
“What?” You asked. 
“Let me take care of you. Properly,” he said, wiggling his fingers. “You deserve to go to bed squeaky clean and comfy.” 
You smiled, reaching to take his hand, except you pulled him back down to bed. “No,” you answered decisively. “I don’t want to wash you off,” you admitted, looking him in the eye. “I want to feel like this, to smell like you, to be full of you,” you told him. “So come to bed.” 
You watched as he swallowed, his Adam’s apple rising and falling before he finally answered. “Gladly.”
--
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nixedsignals · 1 year
Text
confession // Captain John Price x reader
summary: a mission gone wrong leaves you in the hospital and Captain Price hasn’t come to see you yet.
warnings: descriptions of torture and injury. language. angsty, fluff at the end
a/n: tbh i just really wanted to write a Price thing <3
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“It’s been a month, boss,” Gaz leans in the doorway of the hospital room, his voice pitched low. Next to him, John Price stands with his arms crossed, eyes never leaving your sleeping form under clean, white, hospital linen.
“I know that, sergeant,” he murmurs, glancing for a second at his subordinate before returning his gaze to you. “What’s your point?”
“She thinks you’re pissed, sir,” he pauses, seemingly considering his words before adding; “Are you?”
“Am I what? Pissed?” the captain turns his sapphire gaze on Kyle, who nods. “Yeah, I’m pissed. I’m fuckin’ furious. They could’ve killed her, an’ when I find ‘em-“
“She thinks you’re pissed *at her*,” Gaz clarifies, gesturing to you. “Sir.”
“Christ, ‘m not. How’d she get that into her head?” John returns his focus to you, watching you roll halfway under the covers before wincing and rolling back.
“Well you haven’t come to see her when she’s awake. For all she knows, you haven’t even been here,” John nods along with Kyle’s words. He’s right. A second passes before John speaks, voice almost completely absent of his typical commanding tone.
“I’ll stay, talk to her when she wakes up,” he claps a hand on Gaz’ shoulder, a tight smile on his face. “You should go home, get some rest.”
“Yes, sir. Be careful with her though. She’s been through it already,” Gaz casts a last look over you before nodding at the captain and taking his leave.
John sighs, quietly entering the room and sitting in a very nearly comfortable armchair next to your bed. He knew you deserved better than his last month of treatment. The memory of *that* day was fresher than he’d like to admit.
You’d been infiltrating an enemy base. It was supposed to be an easy op, in and out, low hostile count. Easy.
What a joke.
They’d set up on two buildings: Ghost and Soap on one, Price and Gaz on the other, ensuring overwatch cover. You had been sent into the bulding. Alone.
Christ, John wished he could take that order back.
At the time, it’d been a good move. The target building had open floorplans and cieling high windows. They should’ve had no issue covering you. Until you’d radio’d in:
“Cap, there’s a stairwell going down in the back corner of the first floor. Wasn’t in the floorplan,”
And you’d gone down.
The dead air time alone was enough to make the ever-stoic Captain John Price sweat in his fatigues. And after 20 minutes of incrimental “What’s your status?”-es, he finally received a response.
“Boss, I fucked up,” your voice was hushed over the comms and Price’s heart dropped.
“Status, sergeant?”
“This place is crawling. Fifty hostiles, maybe more. Entrance is blocked and there’s not another way out,”
“Find another way out, now. That’s an order,”
“Can’t. ‘m sorry. Gonna cut comms and strip my fatigues. They won’t know who sent me. Won’t give anything up. Promise,”
Before Price could stop you, the snap of the walkie cord and static filled his ears.
It took a week to get you back. They found you in a back room, ankle chained to the bars of the dog cage around you. Malnourished, dehydrated, sleep deprived.
It took everything he had to look at you long enough to recognize the muzzle flash burns on your temples and telltale scars running aross your chest and legs from cigarettes being put out against your skin.
Now, your muffled voice drags him from his thoughts. You look better, curled into the stark white sheets. Your cheeks are regaining their fullness and color, and the dark circles under your eyes have all but vanished.
Can still see the scars on your temples though. He shoves that thought away, willing his blood to a light simmer instead of the boiling rage that threatens to consume him.
“Sorry, what’d you say, kid?” His eyes find yours, now fully paying attention.
“Water, please?” you rasp, gesturing to the cup on the bedside table. He nods, grabbing the cup, gently pulling you into a half-sitting position and holding the straw to your lips.
You take a few sips, wincing a little before nodding, a gesture that your finished for now. John sets the cup down, eyes on your throat, brows furrowed.
“They waterboard you?” his voice is even. Clinical. He doesn’t miss the flash of disappointment that crosses your face, however.
“Yes,” you mumble, turning to face away from your superior. “Is that why you finally showed up? To get my report?”
“No, no it isn’t,” he closes his eyes for a moment, steeling himself. “I’m sorry, for not being by ‘til now.”
“S’fine. What are you gonna do now?” your voice grows softer and he can hear tears in the back of your throat.
“About what?”
“To punish me,”
John’s gaze snaps to yours, only just catching a tear on your cheek before you wipe it away.
“You—you think you’re in trouble?” he asks, voice dropping to a deadly low tone. You nod, face contorting at the motion for a brief second. John shakes his head. “Bloody hell, you’re not—I’m not mad at you.”
“Then why have you been avoiding me? I’ve been in here a month and I haven’t even seen you,” now your tears flow freely, streaking down your cheeks. “For the first week, I figured you had paperwork to do, but after a month? Even Ghost came by and you know how he is about going out.”
You curled your arms around yourself, bringing your knees up to your chin, sobs ripping from your chest in a hellish attempt to keep you from breathing evenly.
“I’m sorry, lo-“ he stops himself. He can’t say it, the ‘L’ word. Even as a nickname, it could open the floodgates.
“Tell me then,” you whisper, hiccuping through your tears. “Tell me the truth, why would you stay away like that?”
“Christ, I just-I couldn’t. It was too hard,” he drops his gaze the the floor, suddenly finding the linoleoum tile fascinating while waiting for your response.
“Hard? It was too hard? You don’t think it was hard for Soap or Ghost or Kyle? He’s been here every goddamn day!” your tears begin running down your cheeks, hot and fast as anger replaces sorrow. “You don’t think it was hard for me, sitting in this fucking room thinking that my captain was mad at me because I messed up our mission and lost the intel and got tied up and beaten and—“
“I know that, love,” John snaps, standing quickly and turning away. “I know that it’s been hard. And I know I should’ve come sooner. And you want the truth?”
You nod, eyes wide. John drops back into his seat, reaching out to brush some of the tears from your cheeks with calloused fingers.
“You almost died. You’re lucky you didn’t. An’ the whole time you were in surgery I knew that if I saw you, I’d say something stupid,”
“Why?”
“Because-Christ-because I love you. An’ I shouldn’t ‘cause I’m your captain. But I can’t lose you, knowing I never said it, hell. I’m sorry. For all of this. I’ll never bring it up again. An’ if you wanna put in for a transfer, I’ll approve it. Promise,” he slumps back in his seat, looking more defeated than you’ve ever seen him. His hardened outer shell has worn hundreds of missions and storms and losses, and this is what broke him?
You start to laugh, a small giggle, but it grows and John’s head snaps up. You look happier than you have in a while, even before the incident, and warm blue eyes widen in wonder at your sudden change.
“Say somethin’ funny, did I?” he grins, charming and a little bashful and it only makes you laugh harder. After a minute, the sound dies down, leaving you to ask for your water again, throat shredded from the rollercoaster of emotions.
“I’m sorry, just-didn’t expect you to say that,” you quietly start, hand venturing from under the blanket to find Price’s much larger one. “I, um, I love you. Sir.”
“Don’t-have to call me ‘sir’. Not when it’s just us,” then a pause, his eyes find yours and he lets out a slow breath.
“Will we get in trouble?” your voice trembles a little and John winces, knowing you might cry again.
“No, no, I’ll-I’ll talk to Kate, sort something out. Promise,” he gently moves his fingers tighter around yours, thumb brushing over you knuckles. You smile, brighter than the sun and he swears he gains ten years on his life everytime he sees it.
“Can you kiss me now then?” you ask breathlessly, and John laughs, standing and leaning forward. His lips gently press against yours. It’s chaste and soft and short, but it’s perfect.
-—————-———-—-
“They’ve been like that since I got here,” Kyle Garrick stands in the doorway to your hospital room, arms crossed. Soap is leaned against the opposite doorframe, while Ghost sits in a chair a few feet away.
“‘Bout time too, I swear they’ve been makin’ eyes at each other for ages,” Soap shakes his head, gesturing into the hospital room.
The topic of conversation there, you sleeping soundly in the haze of white linen around you, fingers holding the hand of their captain, who’s snoring at a truly ungodly volume from the chair beside your bed.
“Laswell, 10 o’clock,” Ghost mutters, glancing at Gaz.
“I say we let her try to wake up the captain. ‘Cause I’m not gonna,”
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railingsofsorrow · 11 months
Text
support system
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summary: in which reader goes through a depressive episode but she doesn't need to suffer alone, or. . . in which I got inspired by that hotch and emily's scene.
pairing: platonic!aaron hotchner x gn!reader; platonic!bau x gn!reader
w.c: 2.1K
warnings/content: tw!depression; descriptions of feeling numb, insomnia, poor eating habits, feeling as if you're suffocating and confusion; basically a depressive episode; minor character death (mentioned).
a/n ²: this is based on my own experience, not everyone feels the same way. if this is triggering for you (read the warnings, please) then don't read it.
navi
masterpost
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“Is everything okay?”
You released the grip you had on the file when the voice of your boss brought you back to Earth.
Your head was on haywire. The case wasn't much help, it didn't end well, not like you wanted, at least. Each one of you endured it in a different way but you could see through Emily's eyebrow twitch as she dozed off, in JJ's far away gaze as she stared out the window and in Derek's strained smile as Spencer checkmated him on chess for the tenth time. This job took a tool on all of you but the choice was always clear — you wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
And your head played tricks on you in spite of the death you saw every day. You called it grey days; the ones where, as soon as you opened your eyes to start the day, you'd drift to the void of nothingness. The colours were faint, if there were any at all. They just didn't matter to you as you walked by your apartment and everything was tidy up. While your brain mocked you for the numbness as you ate and the cracks caused by dryness in your lips. Nothing out of order, except for the mess inside your head. As long as it stayed there, it was fine.
But apparently, that's not what happened. You've been reading the same paragraph for the thirteenth time and you had misspelled the same word multiple times. You couldn't concentrate on paperwork and that's when you wished to finish things like Spencer did. He did everything perfectly and fast, always the first to be done even after proofreading it. Fucking IQ of 187.
In resume, you were not fine. The case was just an added bonus. And you were too stubborn to admit it to anybody, most definitely not your boss.
“Yes, sir.” You replied, turning the page after blinking to escape the blurriness of your sleepless nights. “Just finishing up some reports.”
He took his seat by your side, two cups being placed in the table in front of you.
“Why don't you finish up tomorrow?” He offers, leaning back as he relaxed his shoulders. He seemed to be winding off for today, his paperwork forgotten at his side. Those were probably finished already, and more awaited him at his office back at Quantico. Hotch worked too much. You wondered if he ever went crazy for a break — you knew he needed it. “Get some rest. Take a nap before we land? There's still some time.”
Your lips curled up in a smile. The first real one of your day. You found yourself unable to react when people explicitly showed they cared about you. What were you supposed to say? What were you supposed to do?
But it made you secretly warm inside. They care. I'm not alone.
Everyone knew you liked to sleep on the jet. As soon as you walked in and took your seat by the window, you were gone done for the day. Derek often made fun of you but you were used to it.
Today, you went straight to the casefiles. Burying yourself in work in order to ignore the intrusive thoughts running through your mind. That's the best outcome you could gather.
Except it wasn't.
“I can't,” you said, writing down the date on a new file. “Too much to do.”
Hotch stayed silent and you took that as the conversation being over. When you were concluding another set of paperwork, he softly nudged one of the cups into your hands. You blinked up in surprise and that must've been the distraction he needed to pull the files out of your hands and push the mug into them.
A look was all it took for you to accept it and sip into the beverage. Tea. It calms you down. Garcia always makes sure to sneak in a packet into your go-bag, knowing you crave those most of the time — and on days like these — the jet had the tea option too, despite the coffee addicts sitting around.
“I want you to make a deal with me.”
You peered at Hotch through your eyelashes, slightly alarmed. “That's concerning.”
He chuckled, raising an eyebrow. It was weird seeing his strict mask crumble down into a relaxed demeanor without that crease in-between his eyebrows plus the familiar daily harsh glare.
For some, the image of Hotch chuckling was barbaric. You'd definitely never believe it if you hadn't seen it yourself. The same was for any of your friends. It was absurd, but it happened.
“What would this deal be, sir?”
“Take a break,” his gaze lowered to the fawn casefile quickly and then to you, the strict fire in his eyes coming back slightly. Except that that one wasn't from Hotchner, BAU's unit chief, but from Aaron, your friend that enjoyed going on marathons when he had a — rare — day off, the one who actually laughed at jokes involving sports. “You are tired. You deserve it.”
You don't.
There are more victims out there, ones you haven't even heard of yet and you're whining about not having enough sleep or not being able to breath right because your chest is tight.
You don't deserve rest. You don't deserve the life you have. You don't—
“I'm almost finished.”
“The deal is: you're gonna go weeks, months even, feeling fine,” he leaned back, watching you focus back on the paperwork. He was able to see the bags under your eyes and that grey haze. Anyone could. No amount of make-up could hide the pain in your eyes. “Then, you're gonna have a bad day.” Your hand froze as you were about to turn a page. He carried on. “And that's understandable. Just let me know when you do and if you'd like to talk about it. Can you do that?”
You wanted to say you were fine and move on, just pretend you weren't dying inside, begging to get some time away from you own thoughts. But a part of you desired to be taken care of, to be heard, even if what you said didn't make any sense. You wished to just be heard.
So, for the first time in a long time, you admitted it out loud — to your boss, of all people. Well, he offered first so that was on him. Through the way he looked at you, a spark of understanding, you wondered if he knew what was going on deep down. Or if he find it too familiar to just let it go.
“I'm having a bad day,” you squeezed the pen on your hand until your knuckles turned white. Diverting your attention to the window, you focused on the clouds as you spoke up. “It's one of many but sometimes I—I can't help it.”
You felt your neck heating up, the shame arriving too soon after you confessed your feelings. It was so hard to talk about them, to be vulnerable with someone else.
Maybe they'll find me stupid. Not maybe, they'll certainly find me stupid and a burden and finally realize that I shouldn't be there.
“We can't control them all the time, can we?”
Your graze drifted back to Hotch, his stance hadn't changed as if he had been expecting your words. He carried on upon seeing the frown of confusion in your face.
“Our thoughts,” Aaron clarified. “We can't control them. Not all the time.”
You nodded quietly in response, munching on your lower lip.
“But we don't need to be alone with them,” he watched as you kept on fidgeting with your hands, picking at your nails. “You know what I do when I have a bad day?” Casting him a curious look, he offered you a sad smile. That reserved expression he had whenever he would mention Hailey in a conversation. “I visit Hailey's grave. I talk to her about everything. Not that I just remember her on bad moments, she's with me every day. But on those times... I need her. And that's what I do.”
“Do you feel better?” You ask, something in your chest crawling up until your eyelids.
Hotch reaches for your arm, squeezing in reassurance. “I do. But it's a lot better when I talk to someone that's here.”
That's when the dam broke. You didn't sob, no. It was more of a silent cry that had been waiting a long time to be released. When you finally know you can be open with someone and they won't judge you for it? It's relieving. You had been waiting on that feeling for such a long time.
“I'm sorry,” you sniffled, pulling your head away from his shoulder. “That wasn't supposed to happen, I'm not like this.”
“You don't have to apologize.” He said gently, offering you his handkerchief. You begrudgingly accepted, it was better than to have snot running out of you nose. You could wash it and give it back later. “It's alright.”
“A hard week, actually,” you shook your head, frowning at your hands. “I was doing everything on automatic, I felt so... numb. And now I just want to cry it all out. As if everything that I've been bottling up—”
“... it's coming back.” You nod as he completed your line of thought. “That happens when you don't get any rest.” He gave you a pointed look and you had the decency of smiling sheepishly. “Do you think you could try and do that tonight? Forget the paperwork. Go home, take care of yourself, get some sleep. I know it's a stretch to say you could have a few days off—”
You gasped, “please don't.” Hotch chuckled softly, and you flushed red at the desperation displayed in your tone. It's not that you were married to work, but disrupting your whole routine like this could make you feel even worse. You had to start by baby steps, like properly eating and sleeping, otherwise you'd feel more guilty for staying off work and the amount of late stuff you'd have to get back to...
“Let's say that if you need to take some time off...” Hotch said. “You can do that. You are allowed.”
“Thank you, Hotch.”
“No need to thank me.” He gave you a soft smile. Soon, both of you got back to your own little worlds. And you took your rightful spot by the window, cheek resting against the small pillow you carry on the jet. You followed the movement of the clouds as the plane whisked by them, your eyelids started getting heavy and that's when you knew that the tea was doing its effect in your system.
You were too wiped out to feel a warm soft blanket wrap around your body, but your fists subconsciously closed around it tightly.
“Are they okay?” Spencer asked softly, careful to not wake you up from your slumber. But you seemed to be in a deep sleep, so much so that you barely moved when he tucked his blanket around your shoulders. He had seen you crying a few minutes ago as you and Hotch shared a quiet conversation. He didn't want to intrude, but his concern was all over the place.
Hotch hummed, the corner of his lips quirking up slightly as Spencer made sure to move the casefiles to the coffee table instead of your lap, leaving you free of any burdens that could wake you up.
“They'll be fine.” He ensured Spencer, whose concerned eyes studied you for a moment before he nodded and sat down on his own seat.
You had a good support team right behind you if needed. You weren't alone, you'd be alright.
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a/n: I really wished someone said that to me. that's pretty much things I want to hear in days like that. if you feel this way, feel free to dm me anytime. if you don't want to talk, I love you either way <3
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lilbabydilljr · 1 year
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Hi I’ve been wanting to post this for a few days but I’ve got no desire to actually write a description. But it’s here if anyone wants! Description will come later, I just dropped my boyfriend off today and I’m kinda sad. Long distance. Blah.
Download (SFS)
Info is now under the cut! Look at me go.
01/18 - If you use any replacement UI built off of Clean UI, please ensure either this package loads after, or delete the turn on images that Clean UI includes. Thank you grilledcheese-aspiration for reminding me! The two turn-ons effected are ‘Musical’ and ‘Neat Freak’ which were originally ‘Hard Worker’ and ‘Unemployed.’
So I will say I probably should’ve done these differently (turn Creative into Artistic as opposed to Vampire, but whatever. They actually started out alphabetical in game which I thought was neat. They’re still fairly close!
But basically what I’ve done here is replace almost all the turn-ons with personality/trait based ones. I’m wishing we could mix and match individual turn-ons actually because as I write this list I’m already worried about people thinking there’s too many supernatural ones. But they’re used in my game so idk. They’re much more relevant than full face makeup I feel.
For badges sims require a silver level to have the turn-on. For skills I’ve increased it to 8 points, and if a turn-on mentions a hobby, a sim either needs 5 points or have it as their One True Hobby.
Fitness/Fatness - New icons, unchanged Swimwear > Adventurous - 3 Vacations, Adventurous, Daredevil, Sailor Formal > Alien - Trait, Skin, Eyes Underwear > Animal Lover - 2 Pet Friends, Animal Lover, Cat Person, Dog Person, Equestrian Vampire > Artistic - Artistic, Avant Garde, Photographer's Eye, Savvy Sculptor, Floral/Pottery/Sewing Badge, Arts & Crafts Hobby, Creativity Skill Stink > Athletic - Athletic, Disciplined, Equestrian, Loves to Swim, Sports/Fitness Hobby, Body Skill Logical > Bad Rep - Negative Reputation, Evil Great Cook > Bookish - Bookworm, Film & Literature Hobby Mechanical > Charismatic - Born Salesperson, Charismatic, Natural Born Performer, Schmoozer, Star Quality, Charisma Skill Creative > Content - Platinum, Lifetime Happiness Skill (side note this one will be the first one to go if someone can come up with something better it is my least favourite) Athletic > Dumb - Absent Minded, Less than 2 Logic Good at cleaning > Foodie - Natural Cook, Cuisine Hobby, Cooking Skill Zombiism > Gamer - Computer Whiz, Couch Potato, Loser, Games Hobby Robots > Good Rep - Good reputation, Good Plantsim > Indoorsy - Bookworm, Brooding, Couch Potato, Hates the Outdoors, Loner Werewolf > Magic - Genie, Witch, Fairy Witch > Mechanical - Servo, Bot Fan, Computer Whiz, Handy, Vehicle Enthusiast, Robotics Badge, Tinkering Hobby, Mechanical Skill Hard Worker > Musical - Natural Born Performer, Star Quality, Virtuoso, Music & Dance Hobby, Dance Skill, Creativity Skill Unemployed > Neat Freak - Neat, Cleaning Skill, Personality Cologne > Occult - Werewolf, Plantsim, Bigfoot, Genie, Witch, Fairy, Mermaid Facial Hair > Outdoorsy - Angler, Green Thumb, Loves the Outdoors, Sailor, Gardening Badge, Fishing Badge, Nature Hobby Glasses > Plant Lover - Eco-Friendly, Green Thumb, Vegetarian, Flower/Gardening Badge, Plantsim, Fairy  Makeup > Productive - Ambitious, Eccentric, Frugal, Gatherer, Perfectionist, Workaholic Full Face Makeup > Slacker - Couch Potato, Mooch, Slob, Personality Hats > Smart - Genius, Logic Skill Jewellery > Stylish - Avant Garde, Diva, Irresistible, Proper, Cosmetology Badge, Fashion Interest Custom Hair > Timid - Brooding, Coward, Loner, Shy, Socially Awkward, Unflirty, Personality Charismatic > Undead - Ghost, Zombie, Vampire
Version 2 Added, Choose one
Fixes Fitness/Fatness names. Those were meant for me only!
Creative > Baddie - Daredevil, Evil, Flirty, Great Kisser, Irresistible, Party Animal, Rebellious traits
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bloodynereid · 2 months
Text
Correspondence
part 2 of Those Sunlit Kisses ! read part 1 here, part 3 here & part 4 here
pairing: robert 'rosie' rosenthal x oc (lucy everett)
tw: mentions of war, bomb bunkers, love letters, general fluff, mentions of kissing
description: the love letters between a young couple eager to see each other again.
a/n: whooo part 2!! this part was always in the works ever since i wrote part 1 and even if it's wayyy shorter than the first one i'm still proud of it. ALSO i would strongly recommend you read part 1 before starting this or else you will probably understand nothing that is going on. i hope you enjoy and lmk if you want to be added to the taglist!
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My dearest Rosie,
I realized you didn’t get my address the moment your train was pulling out of the station, and so I hope this letter reaches you safe and sound. I already miss you more than I thought was possible. What have you done to me, Rosie? 
The sun is setting and that Artie Shaw record you love is playing and my thoughts are just filled with you. I finished packing a few minutes ago, I’m all ready to leave for London in the morning. And I seem to already be regretting my decision to leave this place. I feel such apprehension towards my job and my life there. 
One small consolation is that you, my dear, will be closer to me. I eagerly await your response and remember you will always have a place in my heart. I love you.
Yours,
Lucy XXXXX
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My darling Lucy,
You cannot imagine the joy that went through my body when I received your letter. Oh my dear how I miss you so. I want to go back to those days on the beach.
The summer sun here is almost stifling, it makes the oil pungent and the heat seems to be strangling me. I am currently hiding away in my bunk, trying to read your letter in peace but Croz keeps sending me these glances. It’s like he knows I’m writing to you and not my Ma, but that might be because of the stupid grin that appears on my face whenever I think of you. You are also plaguing me in every way.
I imagine that you are in London now, just hours away from me… I could easily just hop on a train and go see your beautiful face again. Or maybe you can come here soon. Just say the word, my love.
Tell me all about work and your new article! I searched for your paper this morning and imagine my surprise to find your name inscribed there in neat ink. They just published that article you were telling me about a week ago. It was truly incredible, darling.
I can hear Crosby calling, so with lingering thoughts of you I sign off.
All my love,
Rosie XXXXX
P.S. - Crosby says hi!
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Dear Major Rosenthal,
Well isn’t that an official way to start my letter to you. Don’t worry you’re still my Rosie ♥. I’m sorry the heat is horrid over there, if it makes you feel any better I have to sleep with all my windows open because I feel like I’m about to collapse whenever a new gust of heat hits me.
It is dreadfully late to be writing to you but I am too excited to wait until tomorrow. It was wonderful to get your letter as well, my dear. You have been on my mind a lot today, what’s new about that? 
I was sitting on my little kitchen table while the sun was starting to rise and it felt like your arms were around me once more. Maybe I am becoming delirious with my yearning for you or it may just be the heat, but oh I miss you so much, my darling.
I do not know when your next mission is but know you’re in my thoughts and be sure to come back to me.
I am so very glad you read my article, and enjoyed it. I am also grateful you didn’t sing my praises too much, I truly do hate compliments as you know. My next assignment is very exciting. I feel like an actual journalist for once! I’ll be getting to do some field work and interviews so I’m very much hoping that this signifies some kind of turning point.
I wish I could go visit you and see that beautiful plane you were telling me about. When do you have leave again? Or maybe I’ll just take some time off to see you one weekend. Let us meet soon, my darling. Thoughts of seeing you again have me going all giddy inside.
Tell Crosby I say hello! I’m glad you have someone there for you, my darling, when I can’t be. I hope I can meet him soon! I sign off with a kiss and will now go to sleep, awaiting dreams filled with you.
Only yours,
Lucy XXXXX
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Dearest love,
Hello my darling. It truly feels like an eternity since we last saw each other, that house by the beach seems so far away. If you’re becoming delirious with thoughts of me then I’m inclined to say that I’m feeling the same way about you. I have just gotten back from a mission and foregoing any details, it did not go well.
However, I did seem to feel your presence surrounding me while I was up there. Maybe it was because I was so close to death a few too many times and you steered me away from the edge. It was as if you were next to me and whispering sweet things in my ear. 
Oh I am so proud of you, my dear. And I will now sing more praises about you because you deserve them and more. I will be eagerly awaiting your article and I hope you aren’t overworking yourself.
My next leave is in about two weeks and then I have a few sparse weekend passes. Things are amping up over here… I can’t say much more but it’s going to be an important day. I would love it if you came up here but only if it works for you. I am sure I can find some halfway decent jazz clubs in London, so don’t worry yourself too much about that. I just want to see you again.
Crosby read the last part of your last letter and now has been harassing me to meet you. Apparently I look like a love sick idiot while reading your letters and I do have to admit that’s probably true.
I cannot wait for your next letter, sweetheart. I hope you slept well and know you have been in my dreams since the first night we met.
Always and forever,
Your Rosie XXXX
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My dear Rosie, 
I am beyond glad and grateful that you are safe, at least for now. This may be short as I’m in one of the bomb shelters at the moment and there is limited light, but I wanted to reply to you as soon as possible.
I am sure that I can get some time off to see you in the next few weeks. I finished my article and it’s currently being revised, which is exciting. Would next weekend work for you? I could come down there and you can show me around the town, I’ll need to find some place to stay but other than that I am beyond ready to see you.
Do tell Crosby to stop harassing you since I will most likely be there soon to meet him. And do let him know that he is welcome to come to London with you at any time as I have a spare room which I’m sure you wouldn’t be using if you ever came to visit. I love you and I miss you.
Eternally yours,
Lucy XXXXX
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Darling Lucy,
I hope you’re alright and this letter finds you safely. Next weekend would be perfect, Crosby somehow made arrangements so you have a place close to the base to stay at! He seems more excited to finally meet you than I thought was possible. Of course, I am beyond happy to finally see you again.
It has been a long few weeks without getting to see your face, my dear. I don’t know if I could survive another month without kissing you and running my hands through your hair. I go up again in a few hours and wanted to write this before I left. You should know that the note you gave me before I left on that Sunday afternoon has become my good luck charm. It sits in the pocket of my jacket as of this moment.
Maybe sometime soon I can go to London and drag Croz along with me. And that bed sounds more inviting than my bunk…
I love you my darling, and I cannot wait to see you.
Sending you all my love,
Rosie XXXX
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BOARDING TRAIN. ON MY WAY. SEE YOU SOON. LOVE. LUCY.
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part 3
so... little notes about this part: i actually wrote all of the letters except the last one by hand in one of my notebooks before transcribing them and changing a few details. i just felt like it would make them more real idk, if anyone wants to see pictures just like lmk haha.
a few other details of the letters: i have a book of like a collection of letters from wwi and i used some of those as a reference point. i also looked up a bunch of stuff which was actually a really nice self indulgent research project.
crosby was always meant to make an appearance but i ended up toning it down from the original plan.
next part will be the reunion fic and then there's going to be a time jump which will be fun. i'm really just playing with the timeline at this point don't think too hard about it.
taglist: @justheretoreadthxxs @callumsgirl <333
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