#anyways my head still hurts and i have a bday dinner to attend tomorrow so once again I’m taking sleep medicine

[deityofhearts]

the current (and consistent) mood is “my presence is unnecessary and contributes nothing”

#deity dialogue #so like on that note I just don’t know what to do #I feel like I need to be realistic about my place in peoples lives and just idk stop assuming people care #*shrug emoji* like I’m tired of being hurt by stupid shit that doesn’t matter #I just don’t feel like it matters whether or not I exist in anyone’s life or in general #I keep trying to tell myself that isn’t true or tell myself that it’s okay but nothing works #sometimes I do genuinely think maybe people do care and want me in their lives #then I realize I’m just bothering them and not like worth their time and it stings because I genuinely want to be wnated by people #anyways my head still hurts and i have a bday dinner to attend tomorrow so once again I’m taking sleep medicine #getting my fave depression snack tomorrow: tiramisu #perhaps I can opt out of dinner and get TWO tiramisu #but probably not I should probably eat actual food lest my irls get on my case about not eating