#benefit period

[bitchesgetriches]

Dear bitches, I have a question that may benefit the class: I'm lucky to have a job that has a very generous 15 day sick leave policy, and no health issues that would make me take it - except that I also have the copper IUD that gives me horrid cramps on day 1 of my period, for just about 24 hours exactly.

What is the business speak for 'I'm taking a sick day today because of my period'? What is the general business speak for 'I won't be here for a day for health reasons' that doesn't imply contagion or invite questions about how I'm feeling when I come back? Thank you and I hope you know JUST how appreciated you are (seriously, who else would I ask this to)

Sweetie pie... we LOVE that we're the ones you choose to ask this of. This is all we ever wanted--for strangers on the internet to talk to us about their periods!

(Sidenote: I, Piggy, also currently have an IUD, and it leads to practically ZERO symptoms of menstruation. I don't bleed, I don't get cramps, I don't experience mood swings. About once per year my face breaks out in zits and I bleed a small amount for a few hours. That's it. I fucking love it. So readers, just keep in mind that everyone's body is different and your symptoms may vary on any medication. I DIGRESS.)

The #1 thing to keep in mind is that your employer is not entitled to any confidential medical information. If you have cancer, they don't have a right to that information. If you've got a headache, they don't have a right to know. If you're considering a cosmetic surgery, a gender alignment surgery, or any other surgery... they don't need to know. So if you're menstruating and it hurts, they definitely don't get to know.

So my preference would be to go with the direct approach. If you're cramping and you want to take a sick day, just tell your employer "I'm taking a sick day." If they press for details, say "I'll see you tomorrow. :)" If they keep pressing, remind them that they are not legally entitled to your confidential medical information.

But if you'd rather not be direct (and who could blame you?) just tell them you "got food poisoning from the mussels at that place off of i70--you know the one? Yeah last time I'll make that mistake, even if I do have a Groupon. I didn't know puke could even BE that color!" Food poisoning is gross and temporary and tends to dissuade further questions.

Blood Money: Menstrual Products for Surviving Your Period While Poor 

Workplace Benefits and Other Cool Side Effects of Employment 

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#pto #sick time #workplace benefits #navigating the workplace #career advice #sick days #paid time off #menstruation #period

[thelaurenshippen]

cw: harry potter, jk rowling, transphobia

I occasionally see posts/get messages about the various harry potter references in the bright sessions, etc. and I've gotten a bunch of new followers recently so just so any new/younger listeners of my shows know:

jk rowling is a terrible transphobe whom I hold zero respect for and I haven't given a dime of my money to her since she revealed who she truly is. I want the whole bright universe to be a safe space for trans people (including the trans folks in our cast and crew!) and if I could go back and remove those references, I would. but I can't! harry potter was an extremely significant part of my life until...well, until it became very clear who she really was. it makes me so sad to think that folks might be finding TBS now and get thrown out of the story by these references, but just know that the people who made the show do not stand by jk, and that in many ways, the show is a product of its time.

#the bright sessions #harry potter #jk rowling #transphobia #I know there's PLENTY to say about the bigotry in the actual books and I think there's a lot of merit to those criticisms #and I'll own to choosing not to see some of that stuff before all this went down bc the books were meaningful to me #(this is not HP specific - another beloved childhood book series that was EVEN more formative to me growing up) #(is also something I've grappled with in recent years bc I think the author is actually probably wildly misogynistic) #(even though he's never behaved badly (far as I know) in his public life - there's stuff in the text) #BUT ANYWAY #it can be so hard to remember that we didn't have ANY inkling of her bigotry in this regard until 2018 #all of the original run of TBS was written before that #and I'll admit I gave jk the benefit of the doubt in 2018 re: her liking that tweet! I wanted to give her a chance to learn and grow #and she did....not do that #but TAMA was written in that little grace period #and then a few references in TCT were taken out during recording bc june of 2020 was when she really started to go mask off #and so we were making changes in real time #we didn't know what to do about quidditch #bc we were like 'this is a sport that people play in college and it's just called that?' #'and it's already canon that caleb plays?' #and it wasn't called quadball yet #anyway not trying to make excuses! #just know that none of those references were put in with any malice #and I guess I *could* go back and rerecord all those lines and replace them #but I know enough about my original audio engineering to know that it woudl be VERY hard to make it sound natural #and idk I do think there's something to be said for not covering up errors in old work #I'm not going to try to pretend HP wasn't important to me #EDIT: I've turned off reblogs for this post #also this is not me trying to tell other people how to approach their own HP fandom #fanworks especially - there's no benefiting jo in that - and I think it's totally legit for ppl to want to take HP as their own!

[distressed-bird]

Kalina is the most interesting character to me because of all she has going on…

she is Cassandra’s familiar, she is simultaneously a pet and a friend and a servant and a family to a goddexx that is simultaneously her owner and friend and creator and parent and her god and reason to be—Kalina’s relationship to Cassandra is hard to put a name or label on (since what does being a familiar even mean?) but the bottomline is that this cat loves her deity enough to put everything and everyone on the line for her…

And adding in that she is a child of divorce. So to speak. I am extremely normal and haven’t been driven mad by the detail that baby itty bitty kitty Kalina was at Cassandra’s wedding to Ankarna and is remembered to have been toddling after her as she walked down the aisle…

Kalina will be the death of me /lh

#fhjy spoilers #fantasy high junior year #kalina #oh my god and the fact Kalina was there at that wedding—there at the period of time where Ankarna was alive and still a known god and not #presumed dead… this makes the Sylvairean Heresy even WORSE of a life event for Kalina and Cassandra… #the existence of baby kalina implies that Cassandra *raised* Kalina… and the fact they were married means that Kalina wouldn’t have been #raised by only Cassandra but *also* Ankarna. #you are Kalina and one of your parents just was killed by your uncle—their domains were too alike—and you can never talk about them again. #you can never speak their name—share in their memory—the only place they exist is quietly in your memories that must go unspoken due to #Oblivata Mori. And there’s nothing you can do about it… #And then the followers and clerics of your remaining parent start trying to kill her—being mislead by the followers of your goddexx’ sister #Cassandra is the only family Kalina has left—and Kalina’s sentience leds me to think she agreed to become a Curse #kalina let herself be unmade and changed to keep Cassandra alive… and even as the shell of herself—a familiar once but now a living plague— #is so deeply loyal and only interested in what is to the benefit of her *everything*… even if they are currently a Walking Corpse. #Kalina dislike Kristen so much because Kristen is just not being a good cleric and is in the precarious spot of being Cassandra’s only #follower… but ultimately won’t harm or attack Kristen—killing herself first—because Kristen is the only one keeping Cassandra uncorrupted. #yeah im crazy about the relationship and history between a cat familiar and her witch goddess and the layers of their relationship

[butcharium]

Gym updates:

° I am actually..... enjoying this..? Especially strength training makes me happy! I've had the complete sicko sequence of thought and actions being "wow I feel so shitty today maybe I should work out that will help" - then actually gone to the gym - and it works

° I'd still rather eat glass than do running for any extended period of time tho, running does NOT spark joy for me

° I signed up with a PT, we actually work really well together and I feel like she gets me AND she's a fellow pcos girlie!! (Well that's actually maybe why she gets me)

° some of you might remember back in January (?) I met an older butch4butch couple at the gym and womaned up enough to ask for help with bench press! Well I've met them again!!! We randomly met at a market and they invited me to sit down with them and have a coffee!!!! And it was really nice!!! They also told me what days they go to HIT&strength classes at the gym but the one time I've been able to fit it into my own schedule neither of them were there and also I hated the class rip. Sometimes I do pass one or both on my way in and out of the gym tho which is always nice!

° I listen to the original Sherlock Holmes stories on audiobook, and keep this as a treat reserved for the gym. Now I only have a few short stories left! I loved these stories as a kid and would rummage through flea markets to find translations. Now I listen in English and they're just really funny and interesting and have made working out more enjoyable! Idk what to do when I finish tho. I guess I'll have to stop going to the gym or maybe just start from the top again.

° the sauna is currently out of order which is making the dip into the small cold pool after workout slightly less enjoyable. But I've been promised that it shall be back and running by next week (not true the other times I've been told this) but I hope that's the case bc I Love the Sauna, and I enjoy that there's a space where you can just be naked and introverted with strangers (or on your own).

° net positive in my life! I think it is contributing to my being a bit more up-beat and energized, or at least less tired, in my day to day life. I am one who needs structures, but I struggle with implementing them, and the gym has actually been one of the few things I've been able to keep up, and it helps me structure my week!

°EDIT: how could I forget?? My knees are doing much better!!!

(I still appreciate any tips any of you would have regarding the gym or exercises or experiences etc!!)

#i am realmy happy and satisfied! #today i went to the one class i enjoy! #also regarding experiencing that working out actually helps me feel better on shitty days that actually didnt use to be the case during the #previous 5 years ive tried periodically to work out at the gym and it was the same gym and many of the same exercises even but i just think #baseline well being was so bad that the ebdorpins from working out just werent enough to make a proper difference #but now my baseline is a lot better so i feel like for once im able to reap the benefits of working out #musings

[concord-and-cliches]

sure yeah it's very angsty having one's body forcibly aged but also possibly very slapstick [id in alt!]

#there are many benefits to being experimented on but then there are the downsides again (the adjustment period) #btw hi i love you #contra art #fanart #comic #trigun #nicholas d. wolfwood #vash the stampede #meryl stryfe #milly thompson #trigun wolfwood #trigun stampede #tristamp #trigun maximum #trimax #vashwood #implied lol #blood #nicholas d wolfwood

[resplendent-chungus]

This image appeared to me in a dream. It is correct, and could not possible require any elaboration.

#worm #this is what happens when you write a story where #the power system is actually given out by aliens who don't understand emotions so they can harvest the powered people to avoid entropy #resulting in the protagonist sacrificing herself and basically becoming God to stop them #and the protagonist working for the big bad but them both being too paranoid and controlling to co-exist for long despite the benefits #and the protagonist (despite their ruthlessness and ability to rationalize doing anything) gets wigged out when they fuck up a kid #because they have just sliiiiightly more morals #anyways congrats to wildbow for writing Breaking Bad and Madoka Magica at the same time #ALSO i find it fascinating that despite all existing in the same time there was never a time when they were happening concurrently #Worm aligned pretty neatly with Breaking Bad seasons 4 and 5 (both starting in the summer of 2011 and ending in fall 2013) #but Madoka Magica started in January 2011 and ended in April. Worm started just over a month later #and that was right in the period between seasons 3 and 4 of Breaking Bad #thanks for coming to my ted talk

[chocolatepot]

I'm sort of fascinated by my own response to s2, because I started out underwhelmed but decided not to focus on it. And I framed this to myself as a kind of delusion - I wanted to find it good so badly that I was tricking myself into not being bothered by this, that, and the other thing. It helped me keep my hopes up, even when I felt disappointed by stuff in each episode.

And now, with the full season out there and rewatched multiple times, fics based on new stuff read, and, most importantly, many metas consumed and digested, I'm feeling so much better about it all! I'm really grateful for everyone talking it through and helping me to get past my "but this isn't how I wanted it to go ..." impulse.

#periodically I ask myself if I'm continuing to trick myself because my instinct is always that I'm wrong #but I don't think so #tbh this is one of the shows that would have actually benefited from being released all in one go #ofmd #ofmd meta

[kitkatcadillac]

if you piss all over a public toilet seat, and i mean just piss all the fuck over it, and then leave that for someone else to deal with because it "gives people a job to do" or it "isnt your problem" im cursing you, hexing you, dooming you a thousand lifetimes over

#like yeah okay i get the germaphobe thing and i mean dont let me as a stranger Guilt You if you really cannot force yourself to deal w/that #but for people who do this and just refuse to take responsibility and be like A Little Considerate about a space thats not theirs #im CURSING YOU cursing you cursing you. dear god #like people who throw trash on the floor in public places when theres a trash can like 7 feet away because 'gives the janitor a job' #like no. youre a slob and you have bad etiquette. outright. its so rude and nasty. #we have jobs that arent picking up the consequences of your shit attitude. i promise lmfao #skelly speaks #negative // #im on my first day of my period tho and its mega painful djdj so this is where my frustration is going LMAO #please be tidy and considerate thank you #besides like... not throwing trash on the ground makes a better space for everyone. just saying #like Everyone benefits from making better choices about making sure your trash goes into a garbage bin. thanks.

[shutupthepunx111]

Messaging on Menstrual Hygiene Products

Hey all! Checking the temperature – I know that, when I get hygiene products, they all have messages on the wrappers like "#likeagirl" or "strong and powerful woman here" (you get the idea). As a trans man, it's pretty obvious why I would be uncomfortable, but I'm curious about other people's opinions on this (I realize there are more genders than represented below, but for efficiency and visible results, I have listed three).

Feel free to elaborate in the tags and reblog to spread! If you clicked that you enjoy seeing these, please let me know why in the notes

#trans #polls #menstruation #menstrual health #trans men #ftm #nonbinary #im on my period and this is seriously a bother tbh #trying to figure out who this benefits honestly

[murdrdocs]

baby if he’s ‘off-looking’ on tinder he’s probably worse looking irl 😭 chances are he has a shit personality to match and if you’re gonna go out with a shitty guy he should at least be hot

god ur so right

#i hate hot men that r shitty tho #i think i hate men period #plus only one is off looking okay 😔 #but then again NO BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT #celeste’s chats #celeste + lust4lore

[tskva-happens]

seems like so far the #1 enemy of the bg3 modding community has been... *checks note* age. just like... any signs of age whatsoever.

#bg3 #bg3 mods #fandom critical(?) #modder critical #when i started seeing these i tried to give people the benefit of the doubt #because i remember when i was in my late teens and early 20s the concept of being past my 30s/40s/etc felt so far away #and therefore people in those other age ranges seemed to exist in a different world from mine with different life experiences #and back then i would have created ocs that felt and looked as young as i was #and maybe would have felt uneasy romancing a character who seemed to have a large age gap with my oc since that's not my personal preferenc #and maybe SOME of the modders doing this are young and have similar reasons? #so i Sorta. Kinda. understand that thought process. #but i'm skeptical and would bet most of them are actually just adults who cannot handle age. period. #not to mention we're at the point where mods try to de-age npcs for no reason or straight-up ''''yassify'''' companions #or deprive them of their unique physical traits #and that's just. so frustrating and borderline gross. #let the characters in this game exist as they are. they have LIVED and they look like it!!!! that is good and their world is richer for it! #btw i'm talking about age and cosmetic changes exclusively. i'm not even including the racist whitewashing mods in this discussion because #those can go fuck themselves and i hope it goes without saying they deserve no benefit of the doubt. like zero #anyway. rant over for now #auri rambles

[thedevotionaltour]

even for period typical ableism it still drives me nuts for karen to go oh poor matt how can he deal and get around as if he hasn't been blind most of his life at this point and living on his own by himself as an adult for his entire adult life after college and has also lived in the city his whole life like girl use your damn brain he can get around by himself just fine. good god. like take five seconds to use your brain. literally adult man who lives by himself if nothing else that should tell you he is fine and when he needs assistance has the knowledge and ability to go get it you act as if he can't even walk on the sidewalk by himself. he literally shows up to work by himself. it drives me up the wall sometimes how she sees proof of him functioning fine independently literally witnesses it on the daily and still thinks these things. like again foggy isn't great either bc again the period typical ableism (and just general ableism in the world outside of this period as this is a common attitude of viewing disabled people as helpless and unable to function even if they are people who do live independently (and im not touching on people who do need extra support and caretaking in this context. as this post is about these characters in the context of a story. so im talking about what we see there instead of any truly meaningful nuanced way) but the writing here is like. Particularly this way due to the time) he has a modicum more of understanding that matt is literally a capable grown adult man. literally told karen matt is a big boy who can handle himself and then karen went b-b-but you forget he's blind as if foggy hasn't known him for years of his life and is his best friend like PLEASE SEE HIM AS AN ADULT. I AM GOING TO GO INSANE. PLEASE RESPECT HIM IF YOU LOVE HIM SO DEARLY. AND EVEN IF YOU DIDN'T. JUST RESPECT HIM AS A PERSON!!!!!!

#i think it's particularly maddening bc we have seen characters be able to understand civillian matt is like. more than just Blind Man. #i am always highly aware of period typical writing and can remember the context etc etc but sometimes. #sometimes it truly. truly does drive me up the wall. especially when other characters have been capable of not being That Level #of infantalizing. again foggy still isn't much better in a lot of respects he is just as capable of and has been as infantilizing #and insulting as karen has been. for sure. on multiple occassions. no questions asked. but i dont think he does it to the extent karen does #as in we dont see it on page just as much. it's just a bit less. so we see karen focus on it far more. to an almost exaggerated extent #part of that is the romance plot of ohhh i cannot possibly love a blind man while foggy is matt;s best friend of many years #so of course it will be in the way of the stan lee and old romance comics schools of writing that this goes down and is written like this. #of course we see her focus on it a touch more in a different way bc she's still getting to know matt and hasnt witnessed him #for about like a decade(? they met in undergrad right?) function on his own the way foggy has. but jesus christ man. good god. #at a certain point even with the period time context it does just still leave a bad taste. at certain points it becomes less eye roll #and far more maddening and hard to push down. bc it is gross. no matter what time period it is. #again. both of them are pretty disrespectful towards matt about it at this point even if mostly in their inner monologues or dialogues #with each other and not super to matt's face about it every time. but still. sometimes karen drives me far more crazy about it than foggy. #becase at least foggy can in fact recognize every now and then. matt is a perfectly capable grown man who can function and thrive. #and is someone who lives independently but also can know how to get assistance when needed. #while karen at this point has never really once given matt the benefit of that assumption despite witnessing his capabilities. #because even with his act of trying to fit the image ppl have of him. he still functions within that! and shows he can do things! #and ask for help when he needs it! even within his act of making himself smaller and quieter for others. #he's still like. adult man who lives his life. and does stuff on his own time. #i cant really speak about matt on any more deeper level than that in regards to his disabilities. i am not disabled. #i only speak as a reader and someone watching what these characters do and have proven to be able to do and how they act. #so i can only talk about karen and foggy's behaviors and attitudes in that regard. #and also as a person with like. basic understanding of other ppl living their lives. that all ppl live their own damn lives however it is #like most ppl on planet earth. #i apologize if any of my wording here is bad or if i dont talk on it well as none of this in the real world stuff is my lived experience #and you are free to go hey. incorrect. think about that or word that differently. #ok i promise im done now it's just. EUGH. UGH!!!!! #static.soundz

[drumlincountry]

Evil landlord coworker is so evil and so a coworker I really can't cope

#Me Fein #She's periodically like. Pleasant to interact with. And makes an effort with Jamie's pronouns. #Which gives me huge whiplash when she then talks about how everyone on benefits is subhuman #Or about how her accountant is helping her commit fraud #Or how she gets any works done on her house deducted from the taxes she pays as a landlord #By claiming they're done on her landlord property instead #etc etc etc etc #I'm a gentle soul. I don't like meanness and cruelty :( #I don't like someone being decent to me but not decent to other ppl????? #I care too much!! I can't take it!!!! #I don't know how to respond to this situation in a both moral and. Professional way. #🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 #Eefa sells her labour

[walker-lister]

I just have to remind myself sometimes that no matter what anyone else says, the way a piece of media makes me feel and the positive impact it has had on my queer identity is valid, and that tearing myself apart thinking I have to defend it or questioning my own place within queer communities is not at all important when compared to the almost tangible sense of 'rightness' that piece of media helped me to feel about myself.

#just something i've been pondering the last few days #kind of like no matter how much people debate or i suppose theoretically deconstruct media featuring queer stories #the most important thing is how it makes a queer person feel #and I do think it is of course a good thing to ensure queer stories are executed with respect and authenticity #but there's this grey area in fandom spaces in which people may have found rep from a 'unreliable' source i suppose #or something which is queerbaiting- sherlock springs to mind for example yet if people have been able to explore and nurture their own #queerness through that media does that therefore mean their experience is invalid? i don't think so #and my worry is the more we focus on theory the less we focus on emotion and therefore the actual queer experience itself #and sure theory can inform the queer experience and ensure the media is a 'healthy' site of queer identity formation and identity aid #but at the same time scorning or being rude to those who have found certain media an aid is not the right approach to be taking #especially as queer experiences are so wide ranging that one person's idea of 'good' representation is someone's else's of 'bad' #and that unless a piece of media is clearly offensive in its portrayal of queer experience there has to be some benefit of doubt #I think we're still in a period of progression in media espc tv where queer creators are coming to the fore of their own stories #and we've got to 'live and let live' a little about where people are finding sights of queer validation and joy #and perhaps this a naive and simplistic way of thinking but i think queer people can either recognise when something isn't the best rep #but was helpful for them anyway and therefore in a way confer 'ownership' of the media to themselves in how they engage #or there is variety in queer experiences represented in media so that perhaps not everyone finds a 'site' of rep but that does not #therefore invalidate it or make it 'bad' representation #this is just my opinion and it'd be hypocritical for me to not now mention this is only formed from my own queer experience lol #so i'm not trying to tell anyone how to feel or anything just something i'm pondering

[hopalongfairywren]

Saw a mutual spouting progressive 'not all men' shit and am now considering unfollowing. Sigh.

#*most men don't benefit from the patriarchy* THEN WHO THE FUCK DOES #I am sick and tired of people who are able to grasp other forms of systemic oppression and intersectionality in some ways #but fall flat on their faces when recognizing men yes even men marginalized for other reasons #still benefit over women in some ways! #I was attacked and stalked for a period of time by a boy who was not white. I was still mocked people still made excuses for him #I was still told that maybe it was *my* fault because he might be autistic and misunderstanding social queues #BY SOMEONE WHO NEVER EVEN MET THE GUY #so don't you dare fucking tell me only a 'small' minority of men the 'ultra-rich white cishetero Christian men' are the ONLY men who benefi #you're playing the fool for misogynists who weaponize progressive language to guilt women into shutting up about misogyny #PSA this post is trans inclusive and if anyone tries to derail it into a transphobic shitstorm i'm blocking you #tw misogyny #lateral violence #intersectionality #feminism

[7-crows-in-a-trench-coat]

what she says: i’m fine

what she means: the dunkleosteus went extinct 358 million years ago and they’re all dead and i’ll never see one or be able to give it a kiss on the forehead :,(

#dunkleosteus #marine biology #there are many benefits to being a marine biologist #prehistoric planet #prehistoric fish #prehistoric creatures #prehistoric animals #prehistory #devonian #devonian period