#berti

[bertiblogxiv]

'Refusal of the Call' is a narrative trope where-

#ffxiv #berti #stupid doodle but i couldnt stop thinking about it because it made me laugh #non-adventurer wols getting thrown into the whole mess like 'what the fuck i did not sign up for this'

[wizardfancier]

I noticed other people making more than one @woltourney​ propaganda post so since Berti’s round hasn’t come up yet, here he is in his gay lil crafting outfit :3c

Canonically I think he’s a carpenter, since it flows naturally from the gathering and botany side of things. However he’s done a fair amount of weaving because in ARR he had a fling with Redolent Rose and learnt about FASHION, something that up until that point had been a complete mystery to him.

He is also very proud of his garden.

#i wish you could put more furniture in a cottage garden #id have it bursting with plants #but as it is only really this corner is full #berti #woltourney #honestly its nice to just post about berti somewhere again #i might make a ffxiv blog or something idk

[theoniprince]

Roman + hands + live reaction of Alexander and Berti

#roman #alexander #berti #how to dad #how to dad ard #ard #german show #german #my screencaps #my screenshots #they treat Roman like dumb kid in this spisode qq #but I love how his hair changed in that scene #because he is talking with his hands energetically #helgi schmid #andreas helgi schmid #vladimir burlakov #patrick güldenberg

[elektriikhaa]

#santiagoberti #berti

[somosriverplate]

#bruja #berti

[shittywriterbrain]

#brilliant bertie brilliant #jeeves and wooster

[yeah-thats-probably-it]

Hot take maybe but I think Bertie would be FAR more likely to survive the first two months of Dracula than Jeeves would be. Bertie has a healthy sense of self-preservation. Jeeves consistently underestimates how dangerous a situation might get (Steeple Bumpleigh, the club book) because he’s overconfident about his level of control over any given situation. He'd handle Dracula masterfully if they faced off in England, but on Dracula's home turf? Much more doubtful.

I realize this might be a tough sell, so I will explain further (or it's not a tough sell, and I'm going to explain further because I want to). (criteria taken from @canyourfavesurvivecastledracula) Without further ado.

Would Jeeves and Wooster survive Castle Dracula?

Jeeves

Jeeves' survival will depend on how long Dracula finds him more entertaining than irritating. On that basis, I don't think he's long for this world. On the one hand, he has a huge wealth of knowledge about English society and culture that he can recite perfectly from memory. That should buy him at least a little time with noted teaboo Dracula.

On the other hand, he would be absolutely no fun as a vampire plaything. Jeeves cannot be got. Sneaking up on him while he's shaving will yield zero reaction (though that's at least good for his short-term survival--given that, although he DID take the crucifix from the old woman out of politeness, he certainly isn't going to wear it. The rules of fashion don't go out the window just because you're in a spooky castle). Then, although managing the whims of rich jerks is not an insignificant part of a valet's job, Jeeves usually does this by bending his employers to his will. Dracula is not the sort of employer this will work on. It'll just add insult to injury when on top of being impossible to scare, NOW Jeeves is telling Dracula that his favorite cloak is several centuries out of fashion and he's not allowed to wear it anymore.

Jeeves will 100% go exploring in the areas he was told not to go-- though to be fair, he MIGHT actually get away with this, what with his superpower of appearing in rooms without being seen or heard. Said superpower might save him from the brides as well (though this is by no means guaranteed). Since I find it doubtful that Dracula would come to rescue his annoying ass, not being noticed is his best defense.

There are a couple other things working in Jeeves's favor; the question is just whether they'll be enough to save him.

He DOES know shorthand, and could try to send coded letters. He might even have the foresight to squirrel away some extra stationary where Dracula can't find it. But could he get them posted? Would it even do him any good?

He certainly has enough cultural literacy to figure out what his new boss is pretty quickly. If he didn't chuck the crucifix out the carriage window, he might start carrying it around in his pocket.

Psychology of the individual, sure, but the individual in question is a 400-year-old vampire who lives in an isolated castle in a foreign country and is regarded as a terrifying mythological figure in the surrounding villages. Jeeves has never come up against anything this alien before, he's cut off from his normal resources, and opportunities to play people against each other are limited.

He probably has enough upper body strength from all that shrimping and fishing to climb the wall, so he COULD escape if he wanted to, if he survived long enough. It's just, again, that overconfidence, and also Dracula has a vast library full of rare old books that are entirely at his disposal. He's keeping his eyes and ears alert for potential escape strategies, of course, but I don't see him being as desperate to get out as Jonathan was.

There are just a lot of "depends on"s here, and I'm not convinced that luck would shake out in Jeeves's favor, all things considered.

Bertie

Bertie is so perfect for the job of Castle Dracula Prisoner it's like it was made for him. Think about it. Being held against his will in big manor houses comes more naturally to him than breathing. He's afraid of things that are scary. A lifetime of dealing with Aunt Agatha has made him the world's preeminent expert in "curl[ing] up in a ball in the hope that a meek subservience [will] enable [him] to get off lightly." He will NEVER go exploring in places he's been warned away from if nobody is forcing him to (Rev. Aubrey Upjohn's office notwithstanding. There were biscuits in there). He's both fun to talk to and easy to toy with (and extremely English). A+ prisoner. Dracula adores him.

In my opinion, Bertie is at Castle Dracula either because Aunt Agatha got some wires seriously crossed and thinks he’s going to meet an eligible potential bride (I mean, there are certainly brides there), or because Dracula has something Aunt Dahlia wants him to steal (far less likely, given that one of Dracula’s THINGS is famously not owning anything silver). Either way, he's shown himself entirely willing and able to escape down drainpipes if a sitch gets too scaly.

He DOES take the crucifix, and DOES wear it (which is what will save him during the shaving scene, because you KNOW he's going to jump a foot and cut himself like the dickens). He's read enough supernatural goosefleshers to be genre savvy about terrified old women cryptically pushing crucifixes into one's hands. I also think his sunny disposish endeared him to the villagers, and they were particularly vehement about urging him not to go. He doesn't speak German or Romanian, but he's empathetic enough to recognize Pure Terror. So by the time he actually gets to the castle, his imagination is already running wild and he's plenty aware that he is in imminent danger.

I think the biggest risk to Bertie will be the brides; whether or not he's susceptible to trances, if he thinks they're trying to marry him, it's against the code of the Woosters to turn them down. But that only becomes an issue if he comes face to face with them, which, luckily, I think is unlikely on account of the aforementioned "won't go exploring" (and if he did, Dracula would definitely rescue him).

I'm inclined to say due to his drainpipe-escape habits that he WOULD be able to climb the wall and MAY attempt to sneak into Dracula's room to look for the keys if his desperation grows to outweigh his fear. Whether he does or not, though, he does NOT have the stomach to attempt shovel murder, and therefore won't get magic brain fever, and may very well simply walk out the front doors when the people come to take the boxes away. OR he climbs his way out like Jonathan did. Either way.

When Bertie tells this story at the Drones later, Tuppy will say that no doubt it's been greatly exaggerated and all that probably happened was that he spent a couple months in an oldish house entertaining a weird loner.

#do YOU think jeeves and wooster would survive castle dracula? let me know in the comments! #they're in the castle separately instead of together because those are the rules ok #the isolation is key #though if anyone wants to speculate about what would happen if they went together i will NOT complain #i don't even know what's going on with the tenses in this post i'm sorry #// #jeeves and wooster #reginald jeeves #bertie wooster #dracula #do i need to tag dracula spoilers? #sure there are some people new to receiving letters from our good friend jonathan harker #here it is just in case: #dracula spoilers #i have done my due diligence

[hattersarts]

Jeeves & The Inherent Homoerotic Nature of Becoming a Mans Valet

#jooster #jeeves and wooster #bertie wooster #reginald jeeves

[wally-b-feed]

Anthony Fineran (B 1981), Garden Boules Berti, 2023

#Anthony Fineran #Art #Google #Garden #Boules #Berti

[probablyday]

I don't know that the canonical Bertie Wooster could be called "progressive" (or "politically engaged" or "aware of anything that's going on outside of his immediate sphere of acquaintances with funny nicknames") but you can't argue he wouldn't support gay marriage. Bertie Wooster neither likes nor understands straight marriage, but he fights for his friends who inexplicably want to do that.

#bertie wooster #ally to heterosexuals #jeeves and wooster #pg wodehouse

[jeevesandwoosters]

#myedits #joosteredits #jeeves and wooster #reginald jeeves #bertie wooster #jooster #rockmetteller todd #stephen fry #hugh laurie #john fitzgerald jay

[bertiblogxiv]

Just for fun, since I recently got all classes levelled and with a dedicated glam set, here are all my portraits :3c

order:

WHM SCH AST

SGE PAL DRK

GNB WAR MNK

NIN SAM DRG

RPR BRD MCH

DNC BLM SMN

RDM BLU

#get you a man who can do it all #ffxiv // #berti #screenshots #this was fun #apologies for the longish post

[schorschidk]

What? Ich will schlafen!!! #Schorschi #SchorschiDK #Bert #Berti #Katze #Kater #Katerliebe #Katerchen #Katerleben #Katerglück #Katzenliebe #Katzenwelt #Katzenliebhaber #Katzeninstagram #Katzenfoto #katzenaufinstagram #Cat #Katerchen (hier: Bülten, Niedersachsen, Germany) https://www.instagram.com/p/CkMW4UEM-73/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#schorschi #schorschidk #bert #berti #katze #kater #katerliebe #katerchen #katerleben #katerglück #katzenliebe #katzenwelt #katzenliebhaber #katzeninstagram #katzenfoto #katzenaufinstagram #cat

[theoniprince]

Weil ich gerade an sie denken musste  // Chaotic dads 💕

(more spoiler content under the cut)

(Ich liebe diese Szene)

#How to Dad #Roman #Alexander #Berti #ard mediathek #my screenshots #my screencaps #spoiler #spoilers #how to dad spoilers #Gesichtskirmes deluxe... bei allen XDDDDD #nur eine kleine auswahl #wenn ich mal wieder mehr Zeit habe (kann leider dauern) mache ich sicherlich nochmal ne neue Runde screenshots X3 #helgi schmid #vladimir burlakov #Patrick Güldenberg #wie gut diese Szene war #Sami hat sie da schön zappeln lassen XDDD #berti ist recht konstant XDD

[grucomdoo]

Profesionalni Berti mulčer za bagere težine 5 tona www.grucom.rs 0659930900 #maxmetal #berti #mulcer #mulčer #malčer #malcer #bager #bageri #minibager #miniexcavator #miniutovarivac #iskop #iskopnakasika #opremazabager #opremazagradjevinskemasine #spareparts #excavator #excavatorbucket #excavators #srbija #beograd #grucomdoo (у месту Grucom doo) https://www.instagram.com/p/CoVQj2Mr52X/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#maxmetal #berti #mulcer #mulčer #malčer #malcer #bager #bageri #minibager #miniexcavator #miniutovarivac #iskop #iskopnakasika #opremazabager #opremazagradjevinskemasine #spareparts #excavator #excavatorbucket #excavators #srbija #beograd #grucomdoo

[somosriverplate]

#berti #bruja #1990