#but the doom spiral is averted. false alarm.

[juno-infernal]

okay nm i took half an adderall, put on my fluffy black bathrobe, switched the music to goth and new wave bops and now the world is full of beautiful possibility again

#m #still slightly insane. because the moisturizer is not found #and because i am facing the mortifying ordeal of being emotionally invested in a human being. #but the doom spiral is averted. false alarm. #i am going to hang up some of the MANY paintings/posters/misc art pieces i own soon & this is exciting #i have some really neat stuff #and i am trying not to be so sad #about the fact that i thought (as i collected furniture and paintings and dishes etc) #that by now i’d have a home of my own. instead of so many hopes languishing in boxes. #there’s a lot i should just get rid of tbh. it would make things easier. #but i don’t want to completely abandon my hope for a future #where for example i have a use for the silverware my great (x3) aunt left me when she died #or shelf space enough for my weird trinkets. #or my 1 million boxes of books. #it’s… not likely. but i don’t know if i can take giving up entirely yet.