#but then was like “oh but dont believe this woman shes just a creepy stalker who wants to force herself into my life” | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kewltie · 4 years

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in the midst of a battle w/ members of LoV, pro-hero ground zero save a rookie journalist who LITERALLY threw himself middle of all the chaos to grab photos & after yelling at the ignorant fuck, katsuki doesn't think he'll see him again but then HE SEES HIM EVERYWHERE. his name is midoriya izuku & he has some sort of death wish really bc katsuki keep finding him in the middle of all these hero vs villains battles and ONE TIME he tackled down a villain right???? and he doesnt even have a fucking quirk & yet he is seemingly unafraid of everything.

needless to say, katsuki is v smitten bc the litle awkward death defying shit. also, anyone who accidentally send katsuki to the hospital several times a month bc he keep getting into trouble and katsuki have to come rescue him and THEN YELLING AT KATSUKI FOR INTERFEARING W/ HIS JOB – may be katsuki’s true love.

katsuki get so fucking rile up at this quirkless man, who shown no fear and easily go toe to toe w/ him and yet is so incredibly humble and hilariously awkward, he is just into this badass idiot who is entirely devoted to his job and cursed w/ severe stubborn???? feels relatable. so yea, katsuki ofc taps that ass right the fuck away bc he knows a good one when he sees it bc izuku is indirectly responsible for three broken ribs after katsuki had pulled him out of ANOTHER TROUBLING SITUATION. he's a trouble magnet and shit-stirrer and katsuki's heart is moved.

so they start dating and it goes SO WELL. izuku still get in major shitstorm for his job and katsuki still drags him out of it w/ a few bruise here and there, but afterward they go grab a bite and crash at each other place. super romantic and sweet and it's so v good. but!!! there's something weird about izuku. he doesn't talk much about his family, to katsuki anyway. BUT HE'S SUPER CLOSE TO THEM. his parents seem to call him daily and he go visit them often, but he never bring his parents up to katsuki esp his dad & izuku kinda got a stalker??

it's not like katsuki didn't notice right away, but HE THOUGHT IT WAS HIS STALKER. one of his super creepy fans probably but nope this person only tails izuku and when katsuki tell him about it, izuku is like, 'oh that's just toga'. apparently, izuku knows his talker v v well. the stalker apparently is sent by izuku's father to watch out & protect izuku and katsuki pauses bc who the fuck does a journalist who lives on takeouts and shitty cable TVs need a bodyguard?!!! so yea katsuki's new bf background is fucking weird and mysterious.

katsuki has his agency dig into izuku's background (not that they hadn't vet izuku's before for katsuki's safety) but they comb through the archives and izuku's history and it's comes out v v v v clean, sparkling even. honestly, katsuki doesn't know WTF IS UP W/ HIS NEW BF. so he confront izuku about his weirdo stalker/bodyguard, his avoidance about his family & his dad in particular, and his eerie squeaky AND CLEARLY SCRIPTED papertrails. izuku get shifty eyes and is like, "you won't believe me." And katsuki says tersely, "fucking try me."

Izuku drops his gaze to the floor and says, finally, "my dad is the leader of the league of villains." and YEA, KATSUKI'S BRAIN SHUT DOWN FOR SEC bc his deku?? stupid suicidal stubborn bleeding heart deku??? FUCK NO. but izuku just nods his head and grimaces. the LoV is the largest criminal org in the world w/ long list of crimes & longer list of criminals that make its their home. their roster are made up of terrifying people w/ dangerous quirks... and IZUKU, quirkless and softhearted izuku is the leader's most precious son. the idea itself is COMPLETELY ABSURD! HOW does that ever make sense? izuku is a civilian who works normal if a bit dangerous job & doesn't seem to have any *evil* inclinations at all yet he hail from the worst kind of genetic source possible. maybe he's just faking it all along.

which made katsuki absolutely furious that izuku might been some kind of sleeper agent from the LoV sent to trick spy & kill him or something and izuku's eyes wide, immediately protests, "no, no, i swear! i dont have anything to do w/ my fathers... org." but katsuki has a hard time accepting it esp with the truth bomb thrown at his feet now that he realizes HE'S DATING THE ONLY SON OF EVIL OF THE MOST VILE CRIMINAL IN THE WORLD. so yea, he walks out on izuku, saying he need some space & izuku was looking so heartbroken as he left

for the next few days, katsuki stews in his thought. he doesn't tell anyone about what he had found out, but he doesn't contact izuku either. This last for couple of weeks until, one day just as he in the middle of patrol there's some commotion that attract his teams and katsuki is separated from them. he's cornered by several LoV members, outnumbered five to one and katsuki lost his comms in the ensuring scuffles but instead of kicking his ass bc well they're foes, one of them break ranks toga (the blood queen) approach him w/ a bloodthirsty grin & a knife pointing toward him.

"hey, pretty boy," she coos w/ a flicker of edge, "stop ignoring our young master! you made him cried & he won't come out of his room. I hate seeing him so upset bc Izuku-chan should always be smiling! if you dont fix this ill rip your hide from your bones and wear it as a cape."

the group behind her make various grunt of agreement, all promising him death and disembowelment for... apparently breaking izuku's heart. katsuki is so outrage that he nearly explodes on the spot bc these dumbass villains think they CAN BLACKMAL/THREATEN HIM?! HIM, GROUND ZERO?! also, even more furious by the fact that they insuate that HE BROKE UP WITH IZUKU?! wtf, he never said that!! needing space meant just a temporary break s he gets his bearing on wut to do next... but not like a perma break, but izuku's ppl thought their relationship ended.

katsuki is even more offended by that notion bc izuku is even a bigger idiot than he thought. HOW could someone that much of crybaby over just temp break is some manipulative coldhearted spy?? right now his instinct says, izuku is telling the truth. he isn't tricking katsuki.

izuku is seemingly sweet, humble, & awkward but he got that rebellious streak a mile wide. loud in his opinions & shit-stirrer by choice, he faces down villains & heroes alike like they're on equal ground even though izuku is defenseless. he respect the law but only when it applies. katsuki has never seen such a fucking firecracker like izuku who loves people & the world but have little respect for any gov entity or laws and think they're good only when they're helping ppl but otherwise they're abritary (lmao). he such chaotic force for good it's hilarious. so yea, he believes that izuku is the SON OF AFO now bc that lil shit is a menace. A GOOD MENACE, but still a goddamn menace. he seems to stay firmly on the side of 'good' as it is which make his relationship with his villain father a fucking mystery & headache for katsuki.

so katsuki, gritting his teeth, clichely demands the LoV group to take him to their leader so he can verbally kick his bf's ass for keeping his fucked up secrets and stupidly mistaken that they're broken up. the group happily ties up him and blindfolds him bc well SECRET LAIR. katsuki is crazy, ok. like, STUPIDLY CRAZY to go blindly and no backups w/ some of the worst villains in history so he can meet up w/ his stupid bf and his crazy father. he could end up dead tmr or some shit bc it all could have been a trick to lure him in w/ his guard down but if izuku can be an idiot for dating a hero when he's a son of a villain than KATSUKI CAN BE A BIGGER IDIOT FOR GOING TO MEET HIS BF'S VILLANIOUS FATHER AT HIS SECRET TORTURE FORTRESS OR SOME SHIT. love can make ppl dumb and they're both a perfect example of it.

so katsuki get blindfolded and escorted to the LoV hq and it's a suprisingly sweet ride to there. no bumps, no abuse, no torture shit going on. he get offer food and drink and it's FUCKING WEIRD. his kidnappers start some casual convo w/ him about izuku and his job of all things. they even joke about how katsuki arrested one of them one time and almost kill another THE OTHER TIME & it's all happy bs??? it's even worst than torture. katsuki just want this to end already!! eventually they arrive and katsuki is let out. he get inside & his blindfold is off.

it's... nothing like he expected. it's traditional japanese house w/ sprawling garden, koi ponds, & beautiful woods. it's pristine, homey, and terribly normal. "ha, you thought we were going to take you to some kind of evil lair, right?" twice says, grinning bc he's an ass. "that's next time! we save that for official bsn." he jabs Katsuki's in the shoulder playfully. "you're meeting sensei and the mistress so of course it got to be at their house and not the 'office'."

katsuki's hands start twitching like he's going to explode someone or something but he's quickly drag away before he could do anything about it. lead through some hallways before depositing inside a tearoom where there's a SHIT TON of pics of baby!izuku & his childhood accolades on the wall. this look less like a room to greet visitors but to show off izuku. just as katsuki goes to examine a cute pic of bb!izuku playing in a field of flowers & holding one up towrad the camera, the doors slide open and a couple walk in. one of them is an older woman who looks eerily like izuku and the young woman also ft. in many of the wall pics.

she smiles warmly at and goes to greet him right away. "hi, bakugou-kun! welcome to our home, i'm inko, Izuku's mother," she introduces herself. while she's a source of happy energy and warmth, the other man beside her is another story. he gives katsuki's an icy stare. katsuki already knows who he is before he even say anything. AFO looks younger in comparison to his reported age, notably handsome, and he carries himself like some warlord from the warring periods.

"I should kill you," is the first thing he says. "my son should only cry in joy, over his terrible taste in romantic media consumption, & dumber things." spoken like a man who dealt with midoriya walking crying machine izuku his entire life and also a hopelessly devoted father.

"hisashi!" inko scolds. which is strange to katsuki bc he didn't even think AFO even have a name but in front of him isn't some evil man who mastermind gov't take over & ruin so many ppl lives but astupid father overprotected of his son.

"but i won't," AFO admits regretfully. "Izuku would be even more sad and if you're dead your death will haunt him needlessly more. he won't be able to forget you and move on." he frowns, like he actually had CONSIDER THAT ROUTE DEEPLY before casting that idea aside.

What the fuck, katsuki thought and says exactly that, "what the fuck. there's something seriously wrong with you," he points out what he think is v obvious.

AFO shrugs. "I love my son. He's my-" Inko's frown and he clears his throat, "our most precious treasure and we do everything to ensure his happiness. do you understand us, bakugou katsuki? inko and i have raise with love and care for 20yrs and i won't have some rough neck capers try to destroy his smile. i dont care who you are or wut you can do bc i can put you ten feet under w/ a snap of my fingers & nobody will be able to save you but like i said i won't."

Katsuki grind his teeth, fists clenched at his side, before lowering his head. this isnt time to fight, they're not on the field & on the job. this isnt about their respective stance on moral superiority but izuku. izuku is why they're both here. "i came here for him. i want to fix it," he says. "just let me see him." he pauses & grimaces like the taste of whatever he say next disgust him. "please."

AFO frowns, staring at katsuki for a beat, two. like he can pull apart katsuki's motives and tears into his rib to see w/e make him tick. "fine," he waves katsuki away, "you may see him now but if he cry anything beside in happiness i'll have your head and your entire agency." it's not a threat. it's a warning lace with truth that katsuki has no doubt he will carry out if a single tear slip pass izuku and fall.

inko claps her hand happily. "great, i'm glad you guys are geting along so well!" she says, like threats of murder haven't been thrown at his feet. clearly, she's used to the fact that her husband is a completely psychopath and whipped for their son. this fucking crazy family.

katsuki grunts, not knowing what else to say beside, 'have you ever thought of fucking divorce bc yea maybe you will be less crazy by then' but he holds his tongue bc they're still izuku's parents and he already made a bad impression on them even though technically not his FAULT.

AFO doesn't promise anymore murder in his future but the dark look on his face is enough as inko's lead him out & toward izuku's room. she drops him right outside it and gives him an encouraging smile before heading off, but katsuki has no doubt the parents are lurking around. katsuki sucks in a deep breath before raising his fist and knocks. he hears unhurried footsteps on the other side and slowly the door is slide open.

"Papa, I already said--" izuku whines, and stops as soon as he sees who ACTUALLY on the other side. "K-Katsuki?! What are you--?"

Katsuki blinks, trying to get his fucking brain to grapple with the thought of AFO as 'papa' and his head nearly explode. he drags a hand down his face and once again thinks, THIS FUCKIN' FAMILY. "Look, you idiot," he starts in lieu of any answer. "We didn't fucking break up."

Izuku looks haggard, buffy red eyes and the dark circle under it, speaking of how upset he was. he clearly didn't get any good rest these several days they were apart. he lifts an accusatory brow at Katsuki. "you didn't pick up my calls or answer any of my text," he retorts.

Katsuki rolls his eyes. "what part of I needed space, time to think didn't you get?" he snaps back. "It didn't mean go cry and sulk your parent's home like a damn coward because you were too dumb to think of anything beside we may have broken up!"

"But--but," Izuku's lips wobble and katsuki nearly jump out of his skin bc jfc don't cry here or i'll be skinned alive, "i was scared that you really mean it! that's why i didn't want to tell you in the first place bc then you wouldn't want to have anything to do w/ me."

Katsuki sighs, a bone deep tired sigh. "Now, why would you think i would have any problem with dating the son of my nemesis?" he says dryly. Izuku's brows furrow. "All Might is Papa's nemesis," he unhelpfully point out. "I don't think Papa even knew you existed until we dated."

Katsuki scowls. "that's not the fucking point," he shouts, temper rising w/ every word. "Your dad is the fucking boogieman who wants to sow discord in the world & it's my job to catch him &lock away for good. Do you see my moral crisis over this when im dating his beloved son?!"

"I-" Izuku's face falls, "dont you think I dont know that? I've lived with him for over 20yrs, I know exactly what he's capable of." he looks away. "But, he's my Papa & im terrible for still choosing him over the world. So," izuku says solemnly. "i dont expect the same from you."

Katsuki grits his teeth and steps right into izuku's space, up in his face. "Look, im only going to say this once so listen the fuck up," he starts. "I like you. A lot. Stupidly. Gods know why when you drive me up the fucking wall all the time, but here I am standing before you."

"A lot, huh?" Lips twitching, Izuku's eyes go soft.

Katsuki scowls. "Dont make me repeat myself, but yes fucking a lot that your fucking groupies & your old man threatened to kill me several times over did not deter me from coming here," he says, hand cradling Izuku's cheek.

"It's because I'm dating you and not your father. Whatever crimes he'd commited is not on you, you don't have to carry his sins," he tells Izuku, leaning in to press a kiss too fast and fleeting on izuku's forehead. "just stay true to yourself and i'll fucking deal with it."

Izuku's close his eyes and lets out a shaky exhales, the air of relief that passes through him is shuddering. "Ok, ok," he murmurs, opening his eyes to look at katsuki. there's a twinkle in them as he smiles, soft and sweet, the kind you can stupidly drunk on & never let go.

In that hazy moment, katsuki thinks, AFO doesn't need to plan any premeditated murder in case things go v wrong bc this is how he'll die w/ izuku's smile right in his front his eyes, cutting him down one curve lips at a time. Fuck, he's just as whipped for izuku as AFO.

it's good that izuku not a fucking psychopath like his father bc this would have gone v v v wrong. izuku would make a terrifying villain. Worse than his own father bc it's not fear & intimidation that will get ppl to follow him but izuku's own magnetic personality that move them.

"don't ever become a villain, ok?" katsuki insists suddenly, grabbing his shoulder tightly.

"where did that come from?" izuku laughs, eyes crinkling. "And dont worry, papa had tried. many, many times but i haven't turn over to the darks ide if that's what you worry about."

"Good," katsuki says firmly, and thinks the world better for it. one less crazy midoriya to raise hell. izuku is trouble enough as it is when katsuki thought he was just a quirkless journalist w/ a death wish but now there's a chance he could go rouge any moment and--yea. no.

"Sooo," izuku says, bouncing on his heels. "are we back together now?"

katsuki flicks him on the forehead. "we never broke up in the first place, you dolt."

izuku grins and suddenly throws his arm around katsuki. "ah, i miss you so much kacchan!!!" he declares excitedly.

and after they made up, katsuki interrogate izuku about wtf is wrong w/ his father bc how did AFO of all ppl get a villain son who isn't all about /that/ kind of bsn he's in. turns out izuku always have a healthy regard for heroes so he never thought of joining his father's organization. though AFO would have been super happy to take izuku in bc izuku is terrifyingly clever & resourceful but he lets izuku go & do his thing anyway. they just mutually agree not to talk shop when it's family, keeping their jobs outside &not in the home to keep both of their sanity.

so izuku knows shit about the 'family bsn' except wut everyone knows bc he's not involve with any of that and in his everyday job as a journalist izuku often times clash w/ his father AND expose some of his schemes bc it's part of his job & he doesn't shy away from it. AFO wasn't upset at all having his plans ruin by his own son. nope. he was SUPER PROUD OF IZUKU!!! to able to accomplish such thing on his own even if it's against him lol. but izuku is still his father's so so he doesn't take on just AFO, other villains, & dark org. he takes on the gov't, hero association, and even other heroes themselves if he ever catches on if they didn't live up to his ideals of being 'proper hero' like all might. he fiercely chases and exposes anything that he deems corrupted and wrong not caring which side they're on.

which makes izuku kind of chaotic good. he acts on his own whims & sense of justice, disregarding all rules & barriers. which is why he admires katsuki so much bc katsuki stands by his rule staunchantly & won't ever move from it, izuku knows katsuki wont ever be sway by the dark. kinda like izuku's father who stands firmly by his belief & does everything to reach his goals. WHICH IS NOT EXACTLY WHAT KATSUKI WANT TO BE COMPARE TO ESP BY A NOTORIOUS VILLAIN LIKE AFO lol. but yea, now that he got izuku's motive and why he's the way he is, it get easier.

they continue dating, izuku continues getting into trouble 120% of the time, katsuki keeps bailing him out, and sometimes IZUKU BAILS HIM OUT bc izuku may be quirkless but he got an army of the world's most terrible villains on his side so yea izuku IS TERRIFYING. and they aren't just dating but they're 100000% serious w/ each other bc now katsuki go to izuku's parents house for dinner every sunday and have to put up with AFO and play nice w/ each other for izuku's sake bc they come ton an understanding they will be IN-LAWS one day lol! their dinner convo is mostly the two of them taking jab at each other bc katsuki trash of AFO's plans or AFO's sends katsuki's ppl to the hospital and got away with it. they never stop being enemy even for izuku bc of where they stand on but mutually agree not to kill each other. they're both fiercely devoted individual who are obsessively workaholic, stubborn, vainglorious, and loves just as much as they breathe for their ppl and though they never agree on anything, this they will agree on bc izuku's happiness is everything to them!!!

#bakudeku #not!fic

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yanjunmyworld · 6 years

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When This Story Ends

Pairing: Yanjun x OC

Gif: linyanjun8

Genre: fluff, supernatural

A/N: i was inspired after watching the 2018 little mermaid movie. Its such a good new take on the story if you havent seen it you should check it out! I hope you like this story! Dont forget to leave some feedback ^^.

The bustling crowds paraded through the old market of Tianzifang, looking for whatever unique presents they could take home to their lovers and families. Little did anyone know that down one of the alleyways laid hidden the famous Iqyi dance studio. Famous for its rigourous training and producing only the most dedicated of dancers. The class consisted oh 9 boys and 2 girls; which is where we find our lead male.

The harsh beats pounded through the speakers, as the young taiwanese boy practiced last weeks choreography. Yanjun always made sure to arrive atleast 20 minutes early to recap every piece they learnt. He worked hard to get into this academy and wasn't going to waste a single second of it. He always knew he wanted to perform and share his passion with the world. To hopefully inspire others to follow their dreams like him someday and this was going to be his first stepping stone. Despite this being the main reason for his early arrival, there was another situation which also made his early practices seem the best possible solution. Y/N was the only other person to always be early to class. She was the object of his desires. He loved to watch as her body so effortlessly and gracefully balanced out the moves she was performing. How she would get the cutest of smiles whilst dancing, revealing her two faint hidden dimples. Y/N and yanjun had always had a good chemistry together. They were always eachothers partners and constantly flirting with bad pick up lines. So much so, that the others always tried to set up ways to make them kiss or something to move their relationship along. However for the past 6 months no matter how much they flirted, she would always denie his request for a date and have a different excuse prepared. This frustrated the young male. He has always been a smooth talker and never void of a womans attention but no one compared to her. She was his perfect match and he would do anything to try and make her see just how much he cared for her.

One day, another class mate Zhengting suggested he follow the girl after class to see where she goes. That way he wouldn't have to listen to Yanjuns conspiracy theories anymore. So thats exactly what he did. He followed her to Shanghai rail station onto the express train for Jinshan. He stood in the carriage next to hers leaving just enough space for him to see her and still be hidden. To conceal his identity even more he put on a black snap back and face mask. As he adjusted the brace straps and smoothed down his white shirt. He watched as she smiled looking down at her phone, her bright sparkling doe eyes lighting up as she tries to follow along to the choreography shes watching. Cute he thinks. He recalled her mentioning something about living in Jinshan, when it dawned on him that she was most likely going home. Great. Now I'm gonna look like those weird creepy stalkers thanks to Zhengting. if she catches me, I'm done for. He thought.

50 minutes later they arrived at the small seaside town. Various market stalls lined up against the seashore, selling a variety of meat and fish as well as grills to cook them on. The town wasn't particularly busy, most likely due to the autumn weather settling in.

He followed her down the sandy beach as she gazed at the rippling turquoise water. Her lighting up,exactlt the same as when she was dancing. As he followed her, he noticed them arriving at a smaller more secluded part of the beach, with a small alcove to the side. He watched as she dug up a small seashell box and placed her phone, money and travel card inside; before re-burying it. What a strange thing to do. He thought. However things kept getting stranger. He noticed the female starting to strip off her clothes which brought a light pink blush to his face. No matter how much his brain was telling him to look, he adverted his eyes out of the respect he had for her. It was only once he heard a splash that he looked back to find her gone. He couldnt even see any ripples in the water. How could she just dissappear. That's when his thoughts kicked into overdrive. His first instinct was that she was drowning and so he quickly stripped off and rushed into the water to look for her. Once again finding no sign of life anywhere. That was until he heard a faint melodical voice and a light splashing. He started to walk as quietly as he could further into the ocean not caring that the water was now up to his hips.

Thats when he saw it. A aquamarine tail gently bobbing up and down against the current; as a young girl perched her elbows up on a rock. The more he stared the more he knew he recgonised that small face and bright brown eyes all too well. It was Y/N but with a tail. The young taiwanese male rubbed his eyes causing them to sting slightly from the sea water to make sure he wasnt seeing things. His mind couldn't comprehend what he was seeing to be true. Mermaids aren't real. He thought. He watched as she sorrowfully sang to herself as if the whole weight of the world was on her shoulders. Which was a 180 degree change from the happy go lucky gurl he knew.

"It's so enchanting,I'm trapped and drowning here for everyone to see.

They didn't notice.

How far away i am from everyone and everything.

Silly to have gambled with my heart out on the line

I guess thats just the way it goes. But I'm holding on

I know a day will come when i can be myself again.

And i hope someone will love me.

When this story ends."

Without thinking Yanjun rushed forward screaming out.

"Y/N"

He body jumped fro. the startle of his voice and as her eyes locked with his, they opened wide before she quickly dive into the ocean and swam away.

Since that day y/n had stopped comming to class. Naturally all the boys teased him saying he scared her off with his stalker antics. Which was sort of true but if only they knew. After a full week of absences Yanjun couldn't take it anymore. Everyday his head ran with thoughts and theories and how much he missed her; how he needed answers and he needed them now. Otherwise he would believe he really had gone insane. He decided from that point to go to the beach every single day in hopes of catching her once again. Atlas every day ended up in failure. On the 7th day, just as Yanjun was about to go home, he had the strongest urge to stay until nightfall. So he waited aimlessly staring at the ocean hoping for even a glimpse of her.

Finally he saw a glint of her aquamarine tail again. He made his way out into the ocean to see her perched up on the same rock as before. He stealthily made his way around another rock so he was close enough but still hidden in order to not scare her again.

"Y/N! please don't run away, i just want to talk... I'll even stay hidden so you don't have to see me." He pleaded.

"You do realise i know you have been there the whole time right." She sighed.

"What! I thought i was being an ultimate ninja."

He peered his face out from behind the rock only to discover no sight of her again. That was until he felt a splash of water trickling down his back, followed by a faint giggle.

"No,this is called being a ninja."

How he had missed her laughter. He turned around to look at her and studied every detail. How her long black wet hair shone under the moonlight. How she flashed the soft dimple smile towards him, earning his dimpled smile in return.

"I missed you y/n. Why don't you come to class anymore? Why did you run away? How are you a mermaid? I mean not that your not a hot mermaid but i always thought they were fairytales." He rambled on.

"Slow down Yanjun. I suppose i should answer every question, seeing as you havent left this entire week."

"You knew?"

"Yep"

"So you was just torturing me!" He laughed.

"Yes and no... I...I was scared"

Her voice trailed off as she sat herself uppn the rock bobbing her tail up and down and gestured for Yanjun to sit beside her. So he wouldn't catch a cold.

"I haven't been comming because i was scared what you thought of me. Scared that you had told everyone and that they would outcast me... i haven't exactly had the best luck with humans who found out."

"You don't know how insane I've been going without you! I even have to partner up with Justin and you know how unfocused he is!!! If i told people, they would assume I'm crazy." He laughed

"You might just be crazy Junnie."

She laughed poking his cheek. Yanjun then wrapoed his arms around her and pulled her down into his chest; gently stroking her damp hair and placing a soft kiss upon her head. Resulting in a small pink blush appearing on her cheeks.

"I would never hurt you y/n... you're too important to me."

"Don't you find this weird or disgusting?" She pointed to her tail.

"Nothing about you could ever be disgusting." He smiled.

She the wrapped her own arms around his waist, smiling as she listened to the soft beating of his heart. This was a new experiance for y/n and she was loving every bit of it.

"Tell me everything y/n...please." He pouted as he continued stroking her hair.

"Well...I've always been a mermaid. But one day i saw a group called Nex7 performing on the beach and i was so captivated by their dance style. I had always wanted to dance. The way human bodies could move like that on two legs was beautiful to me. Especially when i could see couples dancing together. There were so many wonders to the human realm that i wanted to be like you people... we have a legend in our species. That a mermaid princess made a deal to become a human for the sake of her love and if she failed she would return to being a mermaid forever. No one knows the ending of the story, so i went to our king and begged for my own chance. The king hates humans...but he's not heartless so we made a deal."

"What kind of deal?"

Yanjun's voice was very concerned by this point. What had she gotten herself into. Was it dangerous? Was the king actually evil? Is he gonna have to run a boat through somebody like in the disney movie? The possabilities were endless.

"I have 1 year... to pursue my dreams of dancing and finding love but i can only be on land for 4 hours before turning back... should I fail or fall for someone who is not my true love... i will be forced to remain a mermaid forever and never have the chance to become human again..." Her voice trailed off.

"So that's why you can't go on a date with me."

"It's not that i don't want too... but i physically can't."

"How long has it been?"

"11 months... my time is running out"

she sighed before diving into the ocean again, letting the salty water cover up her tears again befire resurfacing.

"How do you know if its true love or not if you dont try y/n."

Yanjuns deep brown eyes gazed into her own with such a pleading look, that she couldn't help but feel sadder. She liked Yanjun she really did, but if he wasn't her true love she couldn't take that risk.

"I dont know... one time a seer told me that we will have a instant connection and he has the blood of the ocean within him."

"Just give me a chance, I've been flirting with you long enough" he laughed. "I promise i won't kiss you or anything and i will come to the beach every day so we can date like this."

He smiled jumping off the rock and taking a hold of her hands.

"One chance y/n. Thats all I'm asking for."

She thought about it hard as she observed the young male. How his height towered over her but wasn't intimidating. That soft look he had in his eyes,whenever he looked at her and how they would sparkle when he was dancing. The way his dimples revealed themselves to her and how esoecially breath taking he was at the moment. With his short black hair a watery mess and small water droplets trickling down his abs. Her time would soon run out and she had to make a choice.

"Well even if you aren't my true love,with such little time it looks like im gonna be a mermaid anyway... so I will give you the chance Lin Yanjun." She smiled.

A small grin appeared on his face as he pulled her into his chest again. The heat between them made the cold nights ocean feel like a pin prick. He kept the promise of comming everyday with her after class so they could have their dates. No matter how many times Yanjun wanted them to skip classes so they could go on a real date, Y/n always denied him. She knew his passion for dancing was just as strong as her own and she couldn't let him waste his time on her. Especially if time did run out she knew her dreams would carry on through him.

They'd have picnics at the beach that Yanjun would spend hours preparing, thanks to Zhangjing teaching him how to cook. They'd slow dance on the sand and she would show him all her favourite spots and hiding places so he could always find her. Yanjun always wanted to steal kisses from her but it took all his energy to stop himself out of respect for their promise. The more time he spent with her the more he fell. The way she would sing him a different song every night. How she would gift him rare seashells or other treasures she'd stumble upon. He marked down every single date so he could remember what they had done and how long they had left. But as time went on he found himself not caring if she stayed a mermaid,he would find a way for them to be together.

Before they knew it,it was their last day together. Luckily it fell on the day of the annual beach festival. Various attractions and market stalls were set up on the beach and he finally convinced y/n to sacrifice their dance class so they could spend their last day properly. They walked up amd down the different stalls, y/n getting more excited each time as she had always wanted to attend one of these events. Yanjun made sure to buy never ending supplies of ice cream and candy floss as they ran up and down the beach playing. Dancing along to the smooth beats of the music playing. Y/n had always wanted to ride a ferris wheel and luckily enough one was there lit up by the multicoloured lights against the night sky.

As they headed towards the que,Yanjun noticed a fortune teller gesturing to him. He sent y/n ahead using the excuse that he needed the bathroom before heading towards the young male. The mysterious man was dressed head to toe in a red and black theme with his short black hair slicked back. He had a innocent smile upon his face as he gestured for Yanjun to sit down.

"I got a strong urge when i saw you to read your future."

"And you are?"

"I'm the great Fan Chengcheng. 100% accuracy, never failed." He giggled. "Now give me your hand."

"Why?"

"So i can read your palm idiot. The cosmic spirits are urging me to do it and if i dont they will never shut up."

Reluctantly Yanjun gave him his hand and the young male started to study it.

"You're a very interesting person, i see great fortune in your future... but theres something unique about your blood and the spirit inside you."

"Go on."

Yanjun made his way quickly back to the queue to discover y/n nearly at the front. She hit him gently for taking his time.

"If you were gonna poop,you could of said. Everyone kept looking at me pitifully like i was a loner."she pouted

"I wasn't! I got distracted by a seller and just about escaped! As long as no one hit on you that's all that matters."

Time passed quickly and they were already at the top of the ferris wheel. Y/N was fascinated by the view and how small the town appeared from the height. Her attention was so distracted it was like Yanjun wasn't even there. So he got up and sat himself next to her, pulling her into his chest again.

"Yanjun!!! I wanna see!"

"Let's just stay like this a bit...please."

Y/n smiled and wrapped her arms around his waist listening to his heart beat again.

"I'm going to miss hearing this..." she sighed.

"This heart only beats for you,so without you it's non existant."

"Yanjun..."

"Even if i have to become a merman or something, I'll never leave you and I'll never love another person."

"You cant do that for me.... your hopes and dreams are worth so much more than this fantasy of us and you deserve so much love."

"I would give up my world for you y/n. I love you"

"I...i love you too Yanjun"

He took ahold of her hand and rushed them over to her spot as time was quickly running out. As she jumped into the ocean turning back into a mermaid, he glanced down at his watch. 2 minutes left.

" Yanjun... thank you for everything." She struggled to hold back the tears. "You are truly the most beautiful human I've ever met inside and out. my world has changed for the better because of you. I never thought i could find love, after the way the men in this world treated me. But i realise now, I love nothing more in my life than you."

"I told you from the day we met, that you were my angel that fell from heaven. I meant every word. I love you and only you. I will mever love anyone ever again. I will find a way for us y/n. So never forget me."

"I could never forget you Lin Yanjun."

Just as the last couple of seconds to midnight passed away, she pulled his neck down and placed her soft pink lips against his. Yanjun gently biting her bottom lip begging for for entrance as their tongues greeted eachother passionately and then she was gone.

"DAD WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE WAS GONE!" WHAT SORT OF STORY IS THIS? SEE THIS IS WHY I SAID I DON'T BELIEVE IN MERMAIDS." the eldest boy yelled.

"I haven't finished the story yet son." He laughed.

"I believe daddy!" The youngest smiled gripping her teddy bear tight.

"Do you want to know what the fortune teller told him that day?."

"YES" they both screamed."

“He said you have the blood and spirit of a mermaid inside of you.”

Both kids looked at each other with eyes and mouths wide open.

“THAT MEANS!”

“That means it’s time for bed.”

A young woman walked into the room, her white dress flowing as she walked towards the two young kids and tucked them both into their beds, placing a soft kiss upon their heads.

“Mum, we want to know the end of the story!” The eldest whined.

“You’ll find out the rest, when this story ends.”

She sang slightly before giggling and turning on the night light for the children. The young man turned off the lights as he took a hold of his wife’s hand and walked out of their kids room closing the door.

“Yanjun we promised we wouldn’t tell them until they are older!”

“What’s the harm in them thinking it’s a fairytale for now. A beautiful romantic fairytale. It did me no harm!” he stuck out his tongue at her.

“That reminds me. You never told me Cheng Cheng said you have mermaid blood within you. Or that you met that sly Fan Cheng Cheng at all!”

She crossed her arms over her chest, looking towards him dissapprovingly.

“If I had told you, then our last moment wouldn’t of been as romantic...plus how was i meant to know he was the seer you met in the ocean, he was human!”

He laughed as he placed a kiss upon her lips.

“You ass! I really thought I was going to lose you then and you knew all along. Do you know how much courage it took for me to kiss you!”

“Not as much courage is needed now though.”

He winked and smiled picking her up bridal style carrying her to the bed in their bedroom and placing her gently down upon it. before placing another kiss on her forehead.

“Who would of known my grandfathers stories about a mermaid and a human were true all along.” He laughed

A/N I hope you liked it. The song she sings comes from the sound track of the little mermaid 2018 movie and is called when this story ends! Which is where i got the name of this fic from too haha. In regards to fated blood i’m taking a short break from it until i can work out properly where things are going with that, but i will have many more smaller fics in between that time.

#lin yanjun imagines #lin yanjun #lin yanjun scenarios #NINE PERCENT #nine percent imagines #nine percent scenario #nine percent yanjun #idol producer imagine #idol producer scenarios #idol producer yanjun #yanjun #mermaid #the little mermaid #idol producer

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gravybath · 7 years

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i’m reading killing stalking and i’ll slap my commentary over here as i go. gonna just add as i go okay? okay. it’ll probably get long so how about a read more?

okay, first page. already kinda annoyed by the whole i’m a male and have a guy crush i’m weird thing but.. moving on

also i can’t believe this is just. straight up levi.

why does yoonbum look like he’s already dying when bad shit hasn’t even happened yet hello?

mmmkay so he’s a creepy stalker. okay then.

OKAY okay he is. hes jerkin it okay then. also again why is he already skinny af and look like he’s dying aND no human alive jerks it that way but okay

hooooo, don’t . don’t bring bpd into this,,,,

mmmkay that’s low key,,, creepy sexualizing so much okay then,,

okay !! when drawing random people that are just background/flashback that dont matter !! it’s fine not to draw the eyes but !!!!!!!!! fucking those r ur mains just draw the other fucking eye there is no reason not to that is a front facing pose omfg u can even just copy paste omggggggg

why does this man look like a five year old boy, asking for a friend

don’t u hate when the cops show up when ur trying to break into ur crushes house b/c ur a creepy stalker?

also why are his nails like white? the hands r drawn p nice but why r the nails literally white compared to his skin tone?

okay originally i thought yoonbum was an innocent in this situation but nah no fuck him u don’t break into someones house omgggg

okay more titty than i requested but sure of course 100% necessary to show she naked yup okay,,

oh shit boi the cops talking to sangwoo,, that’s not the face u make at cops but okay lad also i’m cracking up the officers head is like ten times the size of the cop car oka y okay okay focus flynn keep going

i never understood the whole sniff the pillow and it smells like that person thing i have never experienced that?

yes a mysterious locked floor door in the closet obviously covered by things, yes check it out

why would she be wearing underwear but not anything on her top plz explain also that full body drawing the anatomy was super wonky but moving on

i dONT think u have a thigh gap when ur lying on ur side like that but ya kno,,,, whatever,,,,,

what kind of freak locks naked women in their creepy hidden basement?? i dunno maybe the same kind of people that break into their crushes house then smell their pillow

ohhhhhh he got the bat good fuckin night levi

wait did he hit his shoulder not his head? what now?

did sangwoo take his shoes off before dealing w/ the intruder in his house

i have no sympathy for yoonbum sorry not sorry fuck him up sangwoo tho ur a fucking piece of shit too

i’m gonna die !! quick admit u fell in love w/ him then broke into his house b/c u love him so much !! nailed it

this basement’s too small for the both of u, let’s go up. yes !! yes let’s just !! ignore the naked tied of woman and go upstairs like all is fine !!

wait? how does pushing him off the stairs break his legs it looks like he fell on his back but okay,,,,

his hand is going thrU the steering wheel yall !!!! omg,,,,,,, also the blur effect is,,,,, kinda getting annoying

okay,,, okay why r his hips so thicc he is a skinny underweight man why is his ass thicker than pudding

is he just gonna,,,, keep the dead body in his basement?,,,,

midDLE AGED? yoonbum looks like he’s 12 binch wtf

his hands r bigger than yoonbum’s legs okay how them chicken legs hold up all that thicc ass

ah yes, when mentioning how someone has hairy legs, drawing a single hair definitely is enough,,,

sangwoo is,, i just? dump food in his mouth then kiss him okay,,, okay,,,,

i’m disgusting and yet he’s so kind. i love him. god damn this boy u idiot !! he has u trapped in his basement he just admitted to killing multiple people he broke ((i guess??)) ur leg? ofc he is so kind. i’m only mad b/c i’m this level of denial stupid shit

also wait who had bpd? was is yoonbum or sangwoo? i wanna say yoonbum but yeah,,, anywho back to it,,,

i’m sorry but the way they draw feet is horrifying

at least he bandaged,, one leg? and drugged him? annnd okay is he fucking him now okay wait no what

oh! okay he was uhh working out? and yoonbum was in pain,,, okay i don’t think this is the time for a ha ha u thought it was gay moment like ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,anyways once again yoonbum has the thiccest ass

who just fucking works out in their basement where they keep their kidnapped persons also where did the girls body go?

frame one: look how skinny yoonbum is

frame two: thiccest ass in the whole world don’t worry

if ur gonna wash him at least ?? put him in the tub wouldn’t that be easier to clean like u dragged his ass up the stairs wouldn’t it be easy to put him in the tub,,,,

yoonbum like i don’t mind u trapping me in ur house but can i at least get out of the basement

“of course it’s dark... it’s a basement ?” this fucker

again why does yoonbum have a crazy waist and the thiccest ass in the world i will never stop bringing it up b/c ??? he is literally underweight

“ur some kind of county whore” ??????????????

okay so,,, he can be upstairs? but can’t go past the line that starts behind the stairs? why not just make it where he can’t go downstairs? what’s upstairs?

if u loved ur mom fuckboy why did u murder her?

why does sangwoo have so many ?? boxes in his house he’s lived here for a while so ???

has no one noticed yoonbum is missing? no one?? he is a creep but i mean,,, anyone,,,,,

oh fuCK he stabbed him right in the fuckiNG EYE SHIT

wait damnnit he didnt

also how long has he been there? if his legs heal will sangwoo just break them again or will they just always be broken?

u can’t kill people w rat poison i thought tho? like somthing about gag reflexes or is that not tru scream queens don’t lie to me

also he only threw a few pills in the huge pot so honestly even if he ate that hand full of pills he probably wouldn’t have died so he’s just gonna get maybe even barely sick??

also why does he wear a crop top and a skirt like,,,, sangwoo,,,, what u doin there bud,,,,,

why did he kill his mom if his dad was an abusive piece of shit hello??

okay weird romance stuff is like,,, ummmm,,, i;m uncomfortable but okay? he fantasized about killing him multiple times and thought about escaping too he stopped talking about how much he loved him so ?? this is kinda out of place,,,,

“i can suck it” please stop i’m calling the police

“nah you’re scary” fucking !! i agree !!! who fucking does that after trying to kill their actual kidnapper and abuser ???????????/

look if he was still like oh i love him every now and then maybe but the past few chapters have been about him wanting to escape or kill sangwoo so ??

sangwoo is like blushing b/c this boy just rubbed his dick and his own dick then came everywhere and was generally alarming like yoonbum is 100% more alarming at this point. he stalks his crush breaks in attempts to kill him then jerks him and himself off like....

“he’s gonna hit me again” to “fuck he’s making out w/ me” is,,,,,,

with gentle hands he washed and clothed me everyday, and best of all he didn’t lock me in the basement anymore. yes what a gentleman,,,

“it’s so warm it’s like i’m in my mom’s belly again” okay how many layers of fucked up he got some mommy issues this boy also i really wanna kno why he killed his mom

u can’t show dick but u can show plenty of titty ???

“u understand we can’t go to the hospital” yes bby b/c ur a horrifying abusive murderer and broke my legs don’t worry i love u

okay so,, he’s leaving him home alone... why wouldn’t he just get a look on the front door that’s a keyhole on both sides? that would be the easiest way to keep him locked up w/o locking him in the basement?

okay so he’s still planning on leaving okay i don’t understand how he was so happy to suck his dick if he wanted to leave aND r there body parts in the washing machine??

okay i’m p sure u can’t fit that many bodies in the washing machine but okay,,,,wait was that hallucinationS? oh okay okay

again with the thicc ass

u chose this u can’t change ur mind” my boy sangwoo has a lot of issues

yoonbum is like avoid torture seduce him also thiccest ass strikes again

ah yes the notorious glowing dick

okay?? the pacing is so weird like it’s nothing then shit tons of abuse then make out time he he then torture time

thicc ass again

this guy was like suck my dick sangwoo so sangwoo was like let’s go back to my torture chamber ha ha time to die. like what kinda ego....

how could he tell were his fingers were on the other side of the cards okay ???

again w/ the thicc ass and thigh gap while lying sideways????

why is the cough sound effect drawn right over the eye i mean this time you could have skipped drawing the eye?????

again w/ the ass

okay i read it all annnd? i gotta say not as gross as i expected, the pacing is weird and it goes from nothing for pages to too much i dunno. it’s not awful a lot of unnecessary sexualization of yoonbum tho. and the whole is it just fan service or nah? idk i still feel like there r a lot of scenes where yoonbum looks like he belongs in porn so.. not awful but not amazing idk why it’s so popular rn? i really hope it’s not b/c people r making gross fetishy stuff out of it. i would like it w/ more horror/gore that would be nice. but overall it’s interesting i guess? not too terrible but somehow yoonbum is tiny and skinny as hell while still having the thiccest ass around.

#gravy talks #a wild ride #i read ch 1-13

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jheaton416 · 4 years

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Ace and Sep’s Greatest Hits

With Sad Hands and heavy hearts we bid farewell to Ace and Sep's Buffy recaps...

"I get it now. The Slayer thing really isn't about the violence. It's about the power. And there's no one in the world who has the power to stop me now." Just then the Hubris Police step in in the form of Rupert Giles and throw a bolt of green energy at Willow, knocking her clear across the room. "I'd like to test that theory," says Giles, all tall and authoritative. Oh, Giles! Hi! I missed you so much this season! We have so much catching up to do! Let's see. I just finished my finals, and I think I did rather well. And I met a very nice boy who just happens to live in England, so when I'm over there this summer, if you wanna hang out or something just let me know. I gotta hand this over to Ace now, but... call me!

Sep, "Two to Go"

Sep: So there I was. At Trader Joe's, and boom. No Booty to be had. And you know my dedication to all things snack. Ace: I feel your pain. The other night I was at TJ's and they had all these different kinds of Booty from Fruit Booty to Vegetable Booty, but not the Booty that I wanted. Sep: Yargh. That blows. Ace: Snerk. So anyway. Ash asked me if I wanted to get one of the other varieties, but I just felt that if I couldn't have the Booty that I wanted, it was better to have no Booty at all. Sep: Dude. That's deep. And also would have saved me much pain and humiliation in my early twenties.

There are tiny colonies of single-celled life at the bottom of deep fissures in the sea using their cilia to tell each other, "Buffy used Spike." Can we please move on?

Sep, "Never Leave Me"

Ecch, I hear a noise like forty cats being squeezed too hard around their middles. Turns out it's Cordelia singing "The Greatest Love of All."

- Ace, "The Puppet Show"

i dont have time to read all theze post but did u hear what happens in the finale? every vamp and demon that buffy has ever kiled is rezrected and they all sing at spike and angles WEDDING!!!! OMG!!! laterz Sep (Go on. Ban me. I dare you.)

Sep, in the forums

Aw, Willow is wearing shorts and showing more Willow-leg than I believe we've ever seen. What a cutie. ... Giles finally pipes up that he's sorry he missed the encounter, but he actually sounds like he's sorry these damn kids won't leave him alone so he can pour himself a nice single-malt Scotch and watch that Letty The Lusty Librarian tape he has hidden in his nightstand. ... Dracula wears a sweater vest? Well, I guess that answers the age-old question: "What does Dracula wear under his cape?" Or was that Scotsmen? Who does he think he is anyway, Chandler Bing? ... I would like to point out that Spacky is wearing more eye makeup than the entire female cast combined.

Ace, "Buffy vs. Dracula"

Credits. Who does James Marsters have to sleep with to be billed before Michelle Trachtenberg and Emma Caulfield? Ooh! Please let it be me. C'mon, if y'all give me James I won't ask for anything else for my birthday or Christmas. What? It worked when I was ten. ... Look! Xander is using a skill! Effectively! As he's building shelves for Giles, I notice that he's attired in jeans and a plain long-sleeved shirt. It looks like after his other half fell into the Gap, he managed to climb out with a basic grasp on the matching theory.

Sep, "Out of My Mind"

I know this is an unpopular opinion, but I love the 'Bot; I really, really do. She's so cute and happy and chirpy and I just know reanimated Buffy is going to be an angst-y pained ball of angst just like she was all last season, and sometimes I wish we could just replace her with the robot permanently. Especially if she keeps making jokes about marzipan.

Ace, "Bargaining I"

Damn, Marc Blucas makes James Marsters look like a tiny, tiny man. After last week's showcase it's sad, but also amusing, to see Spike reduced to an elfin laundry-stalker.

Sep, "Shadow"

WARNING: Contents may have shifted during shipping. Oops, that's the wrong warning. The warning is this: This recap contains opinions.

Ace, "Tabula Rasa"

Evil Dead eh? I'm just going to take that as a shout-out to me and my Evil Dead t-shirt that I ordered out of the Fangoria (shut up) catalog twelve years ago and have been wearing consistently ever since. David Fury must have seen me in it or something. ... Buffy notices Ben sitting somewhere else and goes over to talk to him. Oh GREAT. You know how, whenever there's an outbreak of some sort of nasty infectious disease, during the news reports they often retrace the path of the virus on a map? Well, that's what my mind is doing with Ben right about now. First I only had to live in fear during the hospital scenes. But then he leached into the hospital parking lot. And now that he's just showing up at the Bronze all willy-nilly, he could just ooze on down the road anywhere his little slime trail will take him. Curses. Greasy Intern Ben is spreading. I wonder what his vector of infection is?

Sep, "Crush"

Tough Love - Or, "The Unedited Buffy You Never Wanted To See." Buffy routes paperwork. Buffy repairs an appliance. Buffy folds laundry. Buffy goes to a parent-teacher conference. Dawn does homework. Dawn does homework some more. Glory practices personal hygiene. The recapper props her eyelids open with spork tines. To spice things up a little, Giles goes all Ripper, Tara goes all Forrest Gump, and Willow goes all Fairuza Balk. The recapper falls asleep and drools on her cat.

Ace, "Tough Love" recaplet

Spike stumbles, bloody, bruised, and wild-eyed, down the hall to the elevator, and if I weren't a fan of this show and were just flipping by I might think it was a clip from a Behind the Music on Billy Idol.

Sep, "Intervention"

...Marci needs to find "the key." ...Darcy or Shannon or whatever her name is ...Sheila or Lisa or whoever

Sep describing Glory before her name was revealed, "Family"

...the guy, who I've decided to call Gee Dub McChoad for no reason whatsoever...

Sep describing Tara's brother, "Family"

Willow screams, 'Noooooooo,' and a rippling force shoots out of her mouth and zaps Osiris, who vanishes. Oh, the heartbreak of halitosis!

Ace, "Villains"

My roommate brought home a big pile of Marshmallow Peeps from a post-Easter sale. I took one look at them and screeched, "Peeps show!" before grabbing one, winging it into the microwave, and making "Bamp-chicka-bow-wow" noises while watching the Peep swell and undulate in the microwave. Try it. It's fun. Also, I have in my notes from the first airing of this episode, "Dawn no like monkey-brain marshmallows." I think I'll just leave that in. You'll either find it as amusing as I do or marvel at my illiteracy.

Sep, "Conversations With Dead People"

Willow incants more at the effigy (who looks like she's ready for a doctor to check her tonsils) and then sends green energy blobs shooting out of her breasts towards Santa's Phallus. It's a lesbian thing -- you wouldn't understand.

Ace, "Grave"

Cut to Xander chaining Spike up in the basement of Casa Summers. Dawn, Buffy, Wood, Giles, Willow, the UN Security council, three random passersby, and a small hedgehog are all in attendance. Okay, not really, but seriously. The number of people present for this is way unnecessary. Giles, Willow and Buffy will perform the spell. Xander, Dawn and Wood will distribute small snacks and throw Jujubes at Spike's head. ... Spike's mum tells him that he "needs a woman in [his] life." He replies that he does have a woman in his life. She is momentarily taken in, but then realizes that William has some really serious Oedipal issues. Victorian etiquette dictates that it would be in poor taste to mention this, so she pretends to be flattered. He promises to always look after her, but she has a coughing fit, hoping to die and escape her creepy son. Knowing that Spike's women-paragon obsession thing in which he defines himself and his moral center by the dominant female figure in his life started back when Spike was human, and has continued until the present day, really makes me realize how pathetic a creature he truly is. You'd think that after the first hundred years he might have self-actualized or something.

Sep, "Lies My Parents Told Me"

Let me amend that. It's a long, thick, snake-like demon with a head shaped just like a penis, that squeals at Buffy and then sprays liquid out of its mouth and onto her. Just think about that for a minute.

Ace, "Doublemeat Palace"

At the Pub the Chuckleheads are sitting around a table strewn with empty beer pitchers, randomly slapping and picking nits off of each other. One of them is trying to remove his shirt but gets his head stuck in it. I can sympathize with him. I've done that -- sober.

Sep, "Beer Bad"

Rack is creepy. Then about ten more anvils crash into my room, followed by a minor deluge of cow pies as we launch into a trippy-druggy sequence the likes of which has not been seen since The Trip and Psych-Out.

Ace, "Wrecked"

Willow is wearing what Ace called a poncho, but I think looks more like a tube with no armholes. If anyone remembers the commercial for the plastic device that enabled you to turn a crank and produce miles upon miles of useful and fashionable yarn tubing, well, it looks like that. Either that, or Willow took up knitting but hasn't figured out the secret to sleeves yet. Patrolling against vampires and other night-haunting demons with your arms bound to your sides by an acrylic strait-jacket doesn't seem like a wise move, but what do I know about fashion? Oh, that's right -- a lot more than Willow, obviously.

Sep, "Something Blue"

Suddenly, my TV screen fills up with a bunch of monkeys, all dressed up in platform sandals, cunning frocks, feather boas, and mascara. They form a menacing circle around Dawn. I think they're all guy monkeys, but y'know, it's a little hard to tell with the simians.

Ace, "Potential"

It's Cruella D'Will. Heh. That's why she flayed Warren last week. She's making a coat out of him. Man, how much cooler would this episode be if Willow pranced around singing, 'See my vest! See my vest! It was once Warren's chest!' ... This is a test of the Emergency Snorecast System. Everything operational.

Sep, "Two to Go"

Sunny Valley, Arizona Ace, a beautiful, brainy, and brilliant recapper for TWoP, that world-famous website and recipient of three Nobel Prizes for Internet Criticism, piloted her pink bubble-shaped hovercraft to the landing strip on the roof of her lux penthouse apartment. Slim and clad entirely in her everyday garb of form-fitting leather, she headed quickly to her Operations Control room, stopping only to scratch the chin of her almost-sentient leopard, Francesca. "Follow me, little one," Ace purred to her feline companion, "for tonight we view a new Buffy!" In Operations Control, Ace flung her shapely form onto the low designer sofa and thumbed the remote to her wall-sized liquid television. As the episode progressed, Francesca began to pace the room in agitation, for she had never before seen her merry human companion in such distress. Ace's perfectly manicured nails caressed her flawless face as she murmured, "How will I recap an episode so sorely lacking in plot? An episode that consists mostly of Andrew's fantasies and stolen videotaped vignettes of the Scooby gang? Without a narrative structure to follow, at what point should I mention the disturbing basement sex of the un-reunited Xander and Anya, or the empty and unsatisfying riot occurring at Sunnydale High?" Finally, Ace knelt, and attractively wept into the silken tawny fur of Francesca, "I face my greatest challenge ever! Just as the tears of repentant Andrew closed the Seal of Danzig in the school basement forever, so do my hot tears of rage seal my unrepentant loathing of this season!" Los Angeles, CA The evil genius Jane Espenson cackled evilly as she polished her six-inch chrome stilettos and flipped her shiny titian hair. Whirling menacingly in her secret headquarters beneath Reseda, she flipped open her tiny red Mobicom and hit speed-dial. Upon hearing a voice on the other end of the line, Jane leered and snapped out, "Hello, Joss? I think we've broken Ace already. The tears are the beginning of the end. That'll teach her to complain about Andrew's poor grasp on reality!"

Ace, "Storyteller" recaplet

The Knights are gonna get the Key, toniiiight! The Scoobies drive a big RV, toniiiight! This year, the minutes seemed like hours The arc progressed so slowly And still no end in siiiight!

Sep, "Spiral" recaplet

Xander gets snide about what a "simple" decision this must be for Buffy and then leaps up, snarling, "You know, if there's a mass-murdering demon that you're, oh, say, boning, then it's all gray area." Hee -- go Xander! I'm not really taking sides in this argument because I think both Buffy and Xander are both right and wrong here, but I really think it needed to be said that Buffy totally put aside all her Slayer standards in order ride Spike's man-pole, and she's never really admitted that to or faced it as far as I can tell. She's mumbled about how it was bad for her, but never seemed to realize what a betrayal of her calling it was. Buffy wins The Lame Comeback Of The Century Award when her only reply is that Spike is "harmless." Harmless except for the whole part where he could and did harm you, Buffy. Nice self-preservation instincts there, honey. Let's kill Anya because she could hurt men. Let's not kill Spike because he can only hurt Buffy. Uh, where was I?

Ace, "Selfless"

This whole Spike with Buffy thing? My fault. When Angel was on the show, I hated every second of him and his dazed "you can tell I have a soul because I look like I just walked into a tree" method of acting. (Angelus was a different story. A cooler story that didn't spend so much time whining and moping.) Then, when he left, it was like light pouring in through the heavens. I was excited. Happy. I had a new lease on life. I thought, "No matter what, Buffy's next boyfriend won't be so bad." Enter Riley. Riley with his potato nose, thinly-veiled chauvinism, and women issues. And so it was, until it came to pass that Riley endeth. And lo! Happiness reigned far and wide across the land (defined as my apartment), there was much rejoicing, and it was good. Again, I foolishly allowed myself to be confident that this had been the worst. Surely Buffy's next boyfriend...

Sep, "Two to Go"

ASH is really giving a killer performance here. I wonder how many takes it took for him to stop laughing. His singing sounds very soulful and I'm convinced it's his own voice, just very badly synched. Maybe the sound crew had to work overtime on all the Buffy/Riley moaning and ran out of time for the important things. Bad prioritization, guys. For a whole week following this episode, my poor cat is tortured by me following her around the house and bellowing, "No ooooone knows what it's liiiiike/Toooooo be the baaaad cat/Tooooo be the saaaad cat/Behind blue eeeeeyeees." I swear, one of these days she's going to lose her patience, pack her little kitty suitcase and leave. Well, at least I don't make her watch The Others with me anymore.

Ace, "Where the Wild Things Are"

Luke is chanting, "The Sleeper will wake and the world will bleed. Amen!" Because vampires are such religious creatures. Don't you remember that one heartwarming episode they had when they showed them all going to church? Sure, they wanted to eat the rest of the congregation, but as long as they're worshipping in Glen Oak with the Camdens I really don't have a problem with that.

Sep, "Welcome to the Hellmouth"

D'Hoffryn introduced himself, and Aud replies, "I am Aud." Hee. That's a funny pun. You know that saying that goes, "Puns are the lowest form of humor"? That always confused me. I mean, I wondered who decided that, and what the highest form of humor was, and why the phrase always seemed to be uttered only by the very humorless, who wouldn't seem qualified to judge. Anyway, this is 2002, and the saying is obviously obsolete. It comes from an older era. An era before the fart joke. Fart jokes are quite clearly the lowest form of humor, and I suggest that we petition the correct powers that be to have the saying updated for modern times. ["The lowest, and yet consistently the most reliable. Hee. Farts." -- Sars]

Ace, "Selfless"

Willow and Buffy walk up the steps to school, and Xander catches up with them. I'm sorry that I can't recap their conversation, but I'm sure you'll understand once I tell you about Xander's red and moldy green-gray sweater paired with brown and yellow plaid pants. As if that combination wasn't horrific enough on its own, Willow is wearing an orange and yellow striped fleece shirt. It's at times like this that I wish I were blind -- just like the wardrobe people.

Sep, "Passion"

Ace: "I don't know why Buffy was all surprised when Spike tried to kiss her. That's what you do at the end of a date and drinking, dinner, and pool all add up to a date." Sep: "It totally was a date. My last date ended exactly the same way. Someone threw a wad of cash at someone else, the words, 'You're beneath me' were uttered, and one of us was left crying alone in an alley." Ace: "You've got to be kidding me." Sep: "Actually I am. My last date ended with me threatening my beau with a spork."

Ace and Sep, "Fool for Love"

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kewltie · 5 years

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or how pro hero ground zero finds himself accidentally dating the most notorious supervillain, AFO’s precious son.

his name is midoriya izuku & he has some sort of death wish really bc katsuki keep finding him in the middle of all these hero vs villains battles and ONE TIME he tackled down a villain right???? and he doesnt even have a fucking quirk & yet he is seemingly unfraid of everything

needless to say, katsuki is v smitten bc the lil awkward death defying shit. also, anyone who accidentally send katsuki to the hospital several times bc he keep getting into trouble and katsuki have to come rescue him and THEN YELLING AT KATSUKI FOR INTERFEARING W/ HIS JOB

katsuki get so fucking rile up at this quirkless man, who shown no fear and easily go toe to toe w/ him and yet is so incrdiably humble and hilariously akward, he is just into this badass idiot who is entirely devoted to his job and cursed w/ severe stubborn???? feels relatable.

so yea, katsuki ofc taps that ass right the fuck away bc he knows a good one when izuku is indirectly responsible for three broken ribs after katsuki had pulled him out of ANOTHER TROUBLING SITUATION. he's a trouble magnet and shit-stirrer and katsuki's heart is moved.

so the start dating and it goes SO WELL. izuku still get in major shitstorm for his job and katsuki still drags him out of it w/ a few bruise here and there, but afterward they go grab a bite and crash at each other place. super romantic nd sweet and it's so v good. but!!!

there's something weird about izuku. he doesn't talk much about his family, to katsuki anyway. BUT HE'S SUPER CLOSE TO THEM. his parents seem to call him daily and he go visit them often, but he never bring his parents up to katsuki esp his dad & izuku kinda got a stalker??

the stalker apparently is sent by izuku's father to watch out & protect izuku and katsuki pauses bc who the fuck does a journalist who lives on takeouts and shitty cable TVs need a bodyguard?!!! so yea katsuki's new bf background is fucking weird and mysterious.

so he confront izuku about his weirdo stalker/bodyguard, his avoidance about his family & his dad in particular, and his eerie squeaky AND CLEARLY SCRIPTED papertrails. izuku get shifty eyes and is like, "you won't believe me." And katsuki says tersely, "fucking try me."

the LoV is the largest criminal org in the world w/ long list of crimes & longer list of criminals that make its their home. their roster are made up of terrifying people w/ dangerous quirks... and IZUKU, quirkless and softhearted izuku is the leader's most precious son.

the idea itself is COMPLETELY ABSURD! HOW does that ever make sense? izuku is a civilian who works normal if a bit dangerous job & doesn't seem to have any *evil* inclinations at all yet he hail from the worst kind of genetic source possible. maybe he's just faking it all along.

but katsuki has a hard time accepting it esp with the truth bomb thrown at his feet now that he realizes HE'S DATING THE ONLY SON OF EVIL OF THE MOST VILE CRIMINAL IN THE WORLD. so yea, he walks out on izuku, saying he need some space & izuku was looking so heartbroken as he left

for the next few days, katsuki stews in his thought. he doesn't tell anyone about what he had found out, but he doesn't contact izuku either. until, one day just as he in the middle of patrol there's some comotion that attract his teams and katsuki is seperated from them.

he's cornered by several LoV members, outnumbered five to one and katsuki lost his comms in the ensuring scuffles but instead of kicking his ass bc well they're foes, one of them break ranks toga (the blood queen) approach him w/ a bloodthirsty grin & a knife pointing toward him.

also, even more furious by the fact that they insuate that HE BROKE UP WITH IZUKU?! wtf, he never said that!! needing space meant just a temporary break s he gets his bearing on wut to do next... but not like a perma break, but izuku's ppl thought their relationship ended.

bc it all make sense now. izuku who stands fearless against villains bc he'd grown up around them all his life and was raised BY THE MOST NOTORIOUS ONE. anytime there's a LoV related incident, izuku always seem to come out of it unscathed like THERE'S A ZONE OF PROTECTION ON HIM.

katsuki has never seen such a fucking firecracker like izuku who loves people & the world but have little respect for any gov entity or laws and think they're good only when they're helping ppl but otherwise they're abritary (lmao). he such chaotic force for good it's hilarious.

so yea, he believes that izuku is the SON OF AFO now bc that lil shit is a menace. A GOOD MENACE, but still a goddamn menace. he seems to stay firmly on the side of 'good' as it is which make his relationship with his villain father a fucking mystery & headache for katsuki.

katsuki is crazy, ok. like, STUPIDLY CRAZY to go blindly and no backups w/ some of the worst villains in history so he can meet up w/ his stupid bf and his crazy father. he could end up dead tmr or some shit bc it all could have been a trick to lure him in w/ his guard down

but if izuku can be an idiot for dating a hero when he's a son of a villain than KATSUKI CAN BE A BIGGER IDIOT FOR GOING TO MEET HIS BF'S VILLANIOUS FATHER AT HIS SECRET TORTURE FORTRESS OR SOME SHIT. love can make ppl dumb and they're both a perfect example of it.

they even joke about how katsuki arrested one of them one time and almost kill another THE OTHER TIME & it's all happy bs??? it's even worst than torture. katsuki just want this to end already!! eventually they arrive and katsuki is let out. he get inside & his blindfold is off.

"that's next time! we save that for official bsn." he jabs Katsuki's in the shoulder playfully. "you're meeting sensei and mistress so of course it got to be at their house and not the 'office'." katsuki's hands start twitching like he's going to explode someone or something.

but he's quickly drag away before he could do anything about it. lead through some hallways before depositing inside a tearoom where there's a SHIT TON of pics of baby!izuku & his childhood accolades on the wall. this look less like a room to greet visitors but to show off izuku.

just as katsuki goes to examine a cute pic of bb!izuku playing in a field of flowers & holding one up towrad the camera, the doors slide open and a couple walk in. one of them is an older woman who looks eerily like izuku and the young woman also ft. in many of the wall pics.

katsuki already knows who he is before he even say anything. AFO looks younger in comparison to his reported age, notably handsome, and he carries himself like some warlord from the warring periods.

"Izuku would be even more sad and if you're dead your death will haunt him needlessly more. he won't be able to forget you and move on." he frowns, like he actually had CONSIDER THAT ROUTE DEEPLY before casting that idea aside. WTF, katsuki thought and says exactly that, "wtf."

"there's something seriously wrong with you," he points out what he think is v obvious. AFO shrugs. "I love my son. He's my-" Inko's frown and he clears his throat, "our most precious treasure & we do everything to ensure his happiness. do you understand us, bakugou katsuki?"

"inko and i have raise with love and care for 20yrs and i won't have some rough neck capers try to destroy his smile. i dont care who you are or wut you can do bc i can put you ten feet under w/ a snap of my fingers & nobody will be able to save you but like i said i won't."

"i want to fix it," he says. "just let me see him." he pauses & grimaces like the tatse of whatever he say next disgust him. "please." AFO frowns, staring at katsuki for a beat, two. like he can pull apart katsuki's motives and tears into his rib to see w/e make him tick.

"fine," he waves katsuki away, "you may see him now but if he cry anything beside in happiness i'll have your head and your entire agency." it's not a threat. it's a warning lace with truth that katsuki has no doubt he will carry out if a single tear slip pass izuku and fall.

katsuki grunts, not knowing what else to say beside, 'have you eve thought of fucking divorce bc yea maybe you will be less crazy by then' but he holds his tongue bc they're still izuku's parents and he already made a bad impression on them even though technically not his FAULT.

katsuki sucks in a deep breath before raising his fist and knocks. he hears unhurried footsteps on the other side and slowly the door is slide open. "Papa, I already said--" izuku whines, and stops as soon as he sees who ACTUALLY on the other side. "K-Katsuki?! What are you--?"

Katsuki blinks, trying to get his fucking brain to graple with the thought of AFO as 'papa' and his head nearly explode. he drags a hand down his face and once again thinks, THIS FUCKIN' FAMILY. "Look, you idiot," he starts in lieu of any answer. "We didn't fucking break up."

"I-" Izuku's face fall, "dont you think I dont know that? I've lived with him for over 20yrs, I know exactly what he's capable of." he looks away. "But, he's my Papa & im terrible for still choosing him over the world. So," izuku says solmenly. "i dont expect the same from you."

"A lot, huh?" Lips twitching, Izuku's eyes going soft. Katsuki scowls. "Dont make me repeat myself, but yes fucking a lot that your fucking groupies & your old man threatened to kill me several times over did not deter me from coming here," he says, hand cradling Izuku's cheek.

In that hazy moment, katsuki thinks, AFO doesn't need to plan any premediated murder in case things go v wrong bc this is how he'll die w/ izuku's smile right in his front his eyes, cutting him down one curve lips at a time. Fuck, he's just as whipped for izuku as AFO.

it's good that izuku not a fucking psychopath like his father bc this would have gone v v v wrong. izuku would make a terrifying villain. Worst than his own father bc it's not fear & imtimidation that will get ppl to follow him but izuku's own magnetic personality that move them.

"don't ever become a villain, ok?" katsuki insists suddenly, grabbing his shoulder tightly. "where did that come from?" izuku laughs, eyes crinkling. "And dont worry, papa had tried. many, many times but i haven't turn over to the darkside if that's what you worry about."

"Sooo," izuku says, boucing on his heels. "are we back together now?" katsuki flicks him on the forehead. "we never broke up in the first place, you dolt." izuku grins and suddenly throws his arm around katsuki. "ah, i miss you so much kacchan!!!" he declares excitedly.

though AFO would have been super happy to take izuku in bc izuku is terrifyingly clever & resourceful but he lets izuku go & do his thing anyway. they just mutually agree not to talk shop when it's family, keeping their jobs outside &not in the home to keep both of their sanity.

AFO wasn't upset at all having his plans ruin by his own son. nope. he was SUPER PROUD OF IZUKU!!! to able to accomplish such thing on his own even if it's against him lol. but izuku is still his father's so so he doesn't take on just AFO, other villains, & dark org.

he takes on the gov't, hero association, and even other heroes themselves if he ever catches on if they didn't live up to his ideals of being 'proper hero' like all might. he fiercely chases and exposes anything that he deems corrupted and wrong not caring which side they're on.

kinda like izuku's father who stands firmly by his belief & does everything to reach his goals. WHICH IS NOT EXACTLY WHAT KATSUKI WANT TO BE COMPARE TO ESP BY A NOTORIOUS VILLAIN LIKE AFO lol. but yea, now that he got izuku's motive and why he's the way he is, it get easier.

and, they aren't just dating but they're 100000% serious w/ each other bc now katsuki go to izuku's parents house for dinner every sunday and have to put up with AFO and play nice w/ each other for izuku's sake bc they come ton an understanding they will be IN-LAWS one day lol!

their dinner convo is mostly the two of them taking jab at each other bc katsuki trash of AFO's plans or AFO's sends katsuki's ppl to the hospital and got away with it. they never stop being enemy even for izuku bc of where they stand on but mutually agree not to kill each other.

they're both fiercely devoted individual who are obsessively workaholic, stubborn, vainglorious, and loves just as much as they breathe for their ppl and though they never agree on anything, this they will agree on bc izuku's happiness is everything to them!!!

#bakudeku #not!fic

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