#but yeah also naturally hes seeing one of the coolest most beautiful talented creative etc girls in the film major rn

[munamania]

also ok maybe had a weird little freak moment yesterday :/ i was with lydia and needed to eat my godawful shitass sushi before going to the library so anyway who do i spot but the roommate with some random guy naturally and im like lydia pause i need to be a stalker but so casually for just like a sec. (this is in a downstairs like cafe/hallway/elevators area) so i stall and then we go to check for a free room to sit in and when there r ppl in it we just go back near the cafe area and theyre over in this little. alcove. of a sitting area. lounging. and im so normal and rlly naturally glanced over a couple times hoping to god the guy didnt see me cause luckily roommate was faced away. anyway. but lydias screenaging it up so im just sitting there awkwardly. and i have to walk past them at one point to get soy sauce to drown the sushi in and maybe that made me look like a weird little stalker too. well again this is if the guy even knows who i am and prob not so whatever its like fine. but like yeah and then i def saw them getting up and then on the elevator to leave so i think my skittish little creature tendencies scared off the vibe from across the room even... and i didnt just wave like a normal person bc i wasnt sure they saw me but we've spotted each other at much greater distances there's simply no way. i was treating them like what the kids call an 'opp' kinda... me when im an anxious little beast...

#and me when i type up a long paragraph abt like nothing happening! <3 #um. and i am overthinking and in my defense. ill lament one more time. HAVENT HAD MY ANXIETY MEDS IN DAYS. so plz be nice.. #and lydia joked abt how i was a little weird. which i was. but now im like fuckkkkk man we're never hanging out again... #they also went back to like one of my stories theyd seen this morning so its like wowwwwww so youre literally obsessed w me.. #anyway. still being so strong and leaving it to them to make a rain check plan if they wanna. and if not thats so hashtag chill #also ive barely seen sam this week which is like nice but i found out they last second saw the eclipse together #and again not that i think i would come up or w/e but i did have sam off my close friends for a while bc he was stressing me out. yk. #and im not sure if um... that would have become evident... doesnt actually matter who gaf #but yeah also naturally hes seeing one of the coolest most beautiful talented creative etc girls in the film major rn #on top of his little fuck buddy. and im not being a bitter little incel abt the fact that hes got bitches and i dont. #bc its like. whatever. too much going on rn to have bitches. tho ill stick to my guns in saying some good sex could fix me a little #yayyyy i love talking #abby talks

[pristinaaa-blog]

A Best of 2018 Albums List that Doesn't Have Any Kids See Ghosts or Daughters on it

Occult avant-garde black metal, awesome Latin dance-pop from Brazil, strong female singer-songwriters who want to save the world. Basically this was music in 2018 for me, a series of albums with breathtaking power and exciting new ideas.

AURORA Infections of a Different Kind (Step I) I have to say that this list is not supposed to be a ranking as it’s simply too difficult to decide which album I liked best. Still, if someone came up to me with a gun in one hand and a puppy in the other, telling me to choose or “the puppy gets it”, I think AURORA’s Infections of a Different Kind (Step 1) would be my choice. It is the most outstanding and the most innovative thing I heard in a long time, carrying an elemental power that hits you hard and makes you dizzy.

Every single note on this record sounds as if everything in the universe was finding its right place. Every harmony and every little thing is perfect, this album gives you a cathartic experience - suddenly everything becomes clear and bright, all the pieces of the cosmos back where they belong. I don’t believe in fate but I have a feeling that this record it was destined to be created somehow. It is insanely powerful and mesmerizing, and it’s nothing I’ve ever heard before.

Aurora really feels like a queen on this album, she has so much love that is enough to embrace the whole world. Using all this love, she takes up the role of the leader who tries to guide people towards a positive future, a role that is the hardest and the most unthankful. Each and every song on this record makes me feel stronger, because they carry the message that it’s all worth it. And well, if such things like this album exist in this world then I guess I have no doubts about that message being true.

Highlights for me are All is Soft Inside, Forgotten Love, and Soft Universe. But the whole thing is amazing. 

Zeal and Ardor Stranger Fruit I used to listen to all these awesome avant-garde bands in the 00’s that sounded like nothing I’d ever heard before. Then they all disbanded and I honestly didn’t think I would ever get to listen to anything like them again. And then I went to Pohoda Festival in the summer of 2018, and was lucky to see Zeal and Ardor live, thus attend one of the most amazing concerts I have ever been to.

Stranger Fruit is definitely one of the most powerful, inspiring, daring and heartbreaking things I have heard in years. There is almost a complete universe in every melody, in all the harmonies and the noisy guitars. The lyrics are so brutal with their simplicity, full of this elemental power. Everything in this music is filled with so much pain, anger and emotion, it really is overwhelming and heart-wrenching, truly beautiful with all the incredible weight it carries. Favourites: Gravedigger's Chant, You Ain't Coming Back, Built On Ashes (this last one is literally the saddest thing ever) 

Pabllo Vittar Não para não I’ve been wishing for a pop album like Não para não for such a long time. I would even go as far as to say I needed it. It’s empowering, sexy, fun, creative, catchy as hell - full of beautiful harmonies and lyrics, awesome Latin beats, tunes played on an accordion - I mean how cool is that? Pabllo is an incredibly talented songwriter, a truly amazing singer, an iconic diva, and to me, her music his incredibly creative and elaborate, and has so much more depth than the songs of the most famous American superstars. (Just to be clear, diva is an absolutely positive word in my vocabulary. It means a person who is fully aware of the talent he or she has, believes in him/herself and goes after what she or he wants, setting an example for us less awesome people.) I love the whole thing from the first moment to the very last, from the perfect pop album-starter, sass-filled club hit Buzina to the Latin pop song titled No Hablo Espanol and the soft closure in the form of the last track Miragem, a graceful finish to what essentially is a break-up record. My absolute favourites are Seu Crime, Nao Vou Deitar and Trago Seu Amor de Volta - these are the perfect examples of the music I have a soft spot for: upbeat, dance-y and happy-sounding, when in reality it is full of sadness and heartbreak.

Anyway. This album will always be close to my heart because I listened to it all the time during my very first trip to New York (or anywhere outside Europe for that matter), so it will always remind me of dancing and singing on the streets of Brooklyn with my headphones on. It made me so unbelievably happy in a very difficult period of my life, and as I don’t speak Portuguese I didn’t even know back then that I was listening to songs that probably have been inspired by another difficult period in another person’s life. Yet the album, especially the songs I highlighted managed to touch something inside me, and I think it’s because Pabllo is one of those songwriters who is able to create depth in her melodies and her vocals as well, not just the lyrics. Which is so, so rare. These people are the best, their songs are like gifts to me and I will always be grateful for them. 

Florence + The Machine High as Hope There’s a liberating boldness and a piercing honesty in this album with all these unexpected confessions from Florence that hit you hard with their openness. I think it’s the very first time she is sharing things that are so deeply personal, and it feels like I’ve been given a gift. To me, she seems like she’s more herself than ever. Listening to these songs she even feels happy to me, like someone who managed to fully embrace herself with all her imperfections. It has an effect on me that’s uplifting and tear-jerking at the same time, I feel like it’s overwhelming me with the universal love and forgiveness Florence expresses towards the world and our faulty humanity. The most prominent example for this is the song Hunger, which is a truly magnificent thing that blows me away every time I listen to it. 

I also love Big God, with its boldness and the melody that reminds me of the early (and coolest) songs of Tori Amos. June is among my favorites as well, it’s the perfect Track no.1 for an album, the way it gradually builds to a cathartic beauty with its simple but wise message.

So what can I even say after this? The songs are amazing, captivating, they bring the usual Florence-like monumental and powerful melodies and production, with mind-blowing vocals (I mean, duuuh), but the majority of the songs here are more on the quieter, more subtle side, which is quite refreshing for me as they sound a lot more natural and pure than the very epic songs on Ceremonials. All in all, this is clearly my favourite Florence + the Machine album, and definitely one of the best albums of 2018. 

Men Named Holger Maelstrom Ahead! Men Named Holger’s debut album is a concept album set in the world of pirates, an amazingly complex thing that is brilliant in how it gradually peels off all the false layers we associate with the adventurous life at the sea - freedom, partying, being outlaws and not giving a damn about anything. This album shows the dark side of this freedom, and through its pirate-related theme it presents heavy feelings and heart-wrenching thoughts we all suffer from sometimes. Like having your people turn against against you even though you did everything you could for them. Or the feeling that you can’t show your true self because you know you will never be accepted by those around you. The feeling when you’re finally free and have left everything behind, followed by this bitter aftertaste in the back of your mind that says it wasn’t really your choice. Or the stinging pain in your heart upon leaving your home, looking ahead in the far distance knowing that you have nowhere to go and that you don’t belong anywhere.

So yeah, this is not the typical pirate-ish-sailor-ish stuff you usually rock out to at Irish pubs - you can absolutely rock out to it, but it’s so much more complex. The guys literally created an own world for their music. They used at least 20 instruments (mandolin, musical saw, balalaika, ukulele, banjo, etc.) to record these songs themselves, which is pretty impressive, yet, it’s not what makes Maelstrom Ahead! exceptional. It’s the emotional depth that’s not only present in the lyrics but in all the melodies, every little note and heartbreaking harmony. It’s a really elaborate and well-thought out album with exciting and versatile songs full of delightful twists and turns that pull you in completely, taking you to an entirely different world. 

#bestof2018 #pabllo vittar #is amazing #zeal and ardor #aurora #mennamedholger #bestof2018albums #florence and the machine #music #review

[abigailslover]

1-65 😘

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?Literally all the time it drives me crazy like what if everything I care about isn't even real 2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?2, I'm not fussed about the dark unless I've just seen a horror or something's freaked me out 3. The person you would never want to meet?Donald Trump ew4. What is your favourite word?Ryan because it's the name of the person I love. Lmao soppy but I also can't really think of anything 5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? One of those tall ones with the thin branches which kinda looks like its about to fall apart but somehow never does 6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?Ah shit I didn't take my makeup off very well last night 7. What shirt are you wearing right now? A gryffindor pj top I got for Christmas. Kinda makes me feel like a traitor to my only true house hufflepuff 8. What do you label yourself as?Sexuality wise bisexual 9. Bright room or dark room?Bright room, then I can see everything and just yeah 10. What were you doing at midnight last night? Watching Friends 11. Favourite age you've been so far?Any age without responsibilities 12. Who told you they loved you last? Ryan before he went to sleep 13. Your worst enemy? Tarah because she's hurt me more than anyone 14. What is your current desktop picture? One of me and Ryan from Christmas a year ago, outdated but still so cute 15. Do you like someone?You'd hope so16. The last song you listened to?Stressed Out-twenty one pilots 17. You can press a button that will make one person explode. Who would you blow up?Donald Trump and hope that all his advisors are with him18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?My brother but only if he's done what we aren't sure of 19. If anyone could be your slave for a day who would it be and what would you do?Taylor Swift but she wouldn't be my slave we'd just spend the day together and go shopping and just have the best time 20. What is your best physical attribute?My eyes 21. If you were the opposite sex for one day what would you look like and what would you do?I would look awful as a guy omg. I'd probably have weird brown hair and just look very average but not like I'm supposed to be like that. I'd masturbate because come on, have sex and just enjoy a ton of male privileges like getting paid more for the same job etc 22. Do you have a secret talent? If so, what is it?I can't think of any 23. What is one unique thing you're afraid of? Being alone. It's not unique but I'm genuinely afraid of being left all alone one day with no one with me24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Each sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposalSo I'd have a baguette with chicken and ham, melted mozzarella and sweetcorn with BBQ sauce 25. You just found $100! How will you spend it? Either use it as spending money on holiday next month in Spain with Ryan or save it for uni next year 26. You have a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world but you have to leave immediately. Where do you go? To see @awkward-is-a-life-choice of course ❤27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. "Be brand-specific" it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don't drink booze there's something you can figure out...so what's it gonna be?Defo jägermeister 28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?Real equality for everyone29. What is your favourite expletive?Fuck, you can use it in so many ways 30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don't worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what's the one thing you're going to save from that blazing inferno? The bracelet my uncle got me for Christmas 4 months before he died 31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? The time when I was more depressed than ever 32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-travelling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super powers...check out this cool shit...you can move anywhere else in the world!I'd go to America and be an outlaw with @awkward-is-a-life-choice it'd be ace 33. The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn't think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?Who will I bring back from the dead? My uncle 34. What was your last dream about?Meeting Taylor Swift. It was so cool 35. Are you a good....[insert anything you'd like here]?Who knows 36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?Nope 37. Have you ever built a snowman?Of course 38. What is the colour of your socks?I'm not wearing any right now 39. What type of music do you like?Mostly pop 40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?Sunrises are prettier but I'm never awake for them41. What is your favourite milkshake flavour?Caramel42. What football team do you support?Literally none I couldn't care less 43. Do you have any scars?A few. A couple of faint self harm scars, a scar on my thigh from work, one on my finger from an umbrella when I was 11, one on the back of my knee from falling on a broken garden lamp, some chicken pox scars and I think that's mostly it 44. What do you want to be when you graduate?I'd love to be a writer when I finish my degree but I know that isn't practical so I want to teach English and Creative writing to college and sixth form kids 45. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be? I'd love to not have anxiety even though it's a part of me now 46. Are you reliable?When it matters, yes47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?Are you happy?48. Do you hold grudges?It depends. If you've done something small I'll get over it pretty fast especially if I love you. But if you've really fucked me over then wooow you've messed up because I'll probably never let it go 49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?I'd mix an elephant and a snow leopard to make an snelephard or something like that and dhdhdhd it'd be so cute 50. What is the most unusual conversation you've ever had?Having to explain to a customer what gravy is when he's never had it or had anything like it and getting v stressed out51. Are you a good liar?Not in the slightest 52. How long could you go without talking?Longer than you'd think. If I didn't see anyone a while. If I saw Ryan I'd really struggle but probably just lay my head on his chest for a while and smile to myself 53. What has been your worst haircut/style?When I had a bob with a box fringe omg WHY. Never again it was such a bad look sjdjdj54. Have you ever baked your own cake?Of course did you even have a childhood if you didn't bake 55. Can you do accents other than your own? Lmao no 56. What do you like on your toast?Usually butter. Sometimes jam, or nutella. If I'm at my Nans honey, and once or twice marmalade 57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?I doodled a flower whilst on the phone to the bank 58. What would be your dream car? One of the new minis. When I graduate and get a teaching job I'm 100% buying a mini 59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain I always listen to music when I shower it makes me smile. Sometimes I sing but rarely. If I'm feeling really anxious and like everything's on top of me I'll just sit in there and feel the water running over me and remember that I'm alive 60. Do you believe in aliens?Not like we've shown them in films etc but I think that there has to be life out there somewhere. To have infinite universes and galaxies and everything and only have our planet have life on would be really sad 61. Do you often read your horoscope?All the time but I don't take it very seriously 62. What is your favourite letter of the alphabet?S. It just kinda flows and is doing its thing 63. What is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?Dragons omg the purest coolest beings 64. What do you think about babies?They're so lucky to have their whole lives ahead of them. A blank slate. Also the cutest things I could honestly cry at babies and legit always cry at emotional giving birth scenes on TV. I want to be a mum so so much