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#fantasy high spoilers
colombinna · 3 days
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kipperlilly: having a tragic family backstory is an unfair advantage against people with regular parents!
*cut to The Seven who all have the normalest parents and family ever and yet they all still became a prominent and popular and successful adventuring party*
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wormtime123 · 2 days
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i couldn't rest until i made something this is driving me insane. so what if i dismissed your success as because of your hardships instead of in spite of them
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cloudmancy · 2 days
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lucy, you're coming back to us too, right? to me?
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paeshsh · 2 days
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Not to “um actually” but Um, Actually the Bad Kids didn’t have any chaperones for their Spring Break quest they had hirelings.
Sandra Lynn, Cathilda, Tracker, Ragh, and to a lesser extent, Gilear, were all technically working for the Bad Kids.
The Bad “in charge of 3 legal & 2 near-adults” Kids vs The Rat “need a chaperone because they aren’t good enough” Grinders had wildly different Spring Break quests
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wyyvoren · 2 days
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something only you can see
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feelingtheaster99 · 2 days
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Oh my gosh Beardsley that was SO SMART to figure out the people whose blood crystallizes are the people who TURN DOWN being brought back to worship Ankarna god DAMN
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jq37 · 3 days
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Your sister who you love so much (even though you’ve never shown it) asks you to be her sister again, her true sister, in deed not just in name. And yes, of course that’s what you want. That’s what you’ve always wanted and now that she’s shattered your defenses and destroyed the ones who would pit you against each other and died right before your eyes, how could you refuse? How could your answer be anything but yes?
So you go home with her, not the ruins of your perfectly posh prison, but a new home which provides love and care and bunk beds and it’s so so nice. Ridiculously nice. Sickeningly nice. And a small, sick part of you almost misses your old home (if you can even call it a home) because yes, it was cruel and awful and you hated every second of it but you knew where you fit. You knew what your role was. You don’t fit in here. Everyone accepts you because they’re all so nice, but they don’t know how to volley back your sharp words or find a hidden, “I love you” within an offhanded insult. 
And then your sister leaves to save the world again because that’s who she is. She’s the kind of person who goes out to save the world with her friends when she’s needed and you’re not. You’re not, not, not. Not on any count. You don’t save things, you destroy them. And friends? You have to allow yourself to be vulnerable for friends so of course that’s out. Your sister is 16 and she’s out saving the world for the third time and you, fully grown at 18, are a wanted criminal who hasn’t even properly graduated from high school. You can’t stop thinking about it and, without your sister and her friends occupying the house as a buffer, the ones who are left try to get you to talk about it so you make a rash decision, as you are wont to do. You leave, like a thief in the night. You can make your own way. You can. You’ll prove it.
You find a shitty apartment and pay for it with the ill-gotten spoils from one of your many exploits. You could probably pawn some treasure for more luxurious  accommodations–there is that chest of rubies just lying around–but you don’t. That’s not what you deserve. And what if your sister needs help later? You don’t have access to your parental funds anymore which means she doesn’t either. You know she won’t ask anyone for help–you wouldn’t. But someone has to look after her. You’re an abjuration wizard. You protect people. You protect her. No, that’s a lie. But you want to make it not a lie. You want to start now.
If you’re saving the rubies then you need a source of income. You narrow down your least villainous talents to try and find a suitable job and hit on teacher. You’re good at magic, right? So how hard can teaching it be? Hopefully not as hard as securing the job, which proves trickier than expected because, oh right, you’re a wanted criminal who hasn’t graduated high school. But you dip into your villainous talents once more and tell yourself it’s for a good cause. You secure the job. You’re doing it. You’re making your own way. 
You want to text your sister to see if she’s doing alright but you don’t want to intrude and you don’t want to answer any questions about what you’ve been doing because then either you’ll have to lie or explain that you’ve left again, right after you promised you’d be there. Both options make your heart ache, especially since it’s her birthday. So you wait until the house is empty (mostly empty–you’re never really alone in a haunted house) and enter the room you and your sister shared for too brief a time. You paint her walls with carefully rendered runes, filled with all your abjuration magic and stamped with your arcane mark. It’s a possessive bit of spellcraft. A selfish claiming of a climactic kill. You mean to make a different kind of claim. You are claiming your sister, as she asked you to months ago. You are telling the world that she will not be fucked with while you live. Your rooms were so close before. You could hear her. You knew every night she went to bed in the grips of a panic attack with no one to console her. She won’t have to feel unsafe in her own room again. You can make sure of that at least. 
The sun rises one morning and you know that means your sister is alive and well and coming home. You teleport to Falinel to make sure she returns to her favorite dessert. It’s worth the spell slot and the chance of being recognized. The tower where they kept you is long destroyed and you know that this time, if you were ever captured or even killed, rescue wouldn’t be measured in a matter of months. It would be days. Hours even if your clever sister and her powerful divination magic put things together faster. The thought fills you with more emotion than you know what to do with. You leave a note. “I love you,” you think. “Enjoy the nemesis ward,” you write. 
Practicing magic, as it turns out, is a very different skill than teaching magic. The children are loud and obnoxious and you don’t quite realize that maybe your expectations are too high between the hothouse you grew up in and your sister being the world’s greatest diviner, fullstop. You know you can always go back to the manor, but that somehow makes it easier to stick it out. You’ve always been taught that pressure provides the best results but there’s something about the security of a safety net that makes everything a bit more bearable. And so what if you have to take a second job involving a light criminal element. You’re only smuggling–that’s barely even a real crime.
Your sister who has saved the world thrice now, texts you and she wants help. She is looking to you for help. And you do your best to oblige. You offer your knowledge, you offer your rubies, you invite her over again and again. She sends you a text and deletes it. You’re not the diviner in the family but you drain your spell slots scrying for information you already know. Information that you'll hear from her own lips in just a few hours. “I love you.”
She finally visits and you’re not unaware of the state of your apartment. You know you’ve been too exhausted for an Unseen Servant or even a round of Prestidigitations but you know that your sister has seen your mind and there’s nothing messier about you than that. She teases you and you tease her back. She’s the only one who understands how to deliver a complement with a backhand so you can receive it without your skin crawling. The only one who knows how much tartness you need with your sweetness. 
Later, she visits again. She sits in your filthy apartment and you watch trash TV and it’s the highlight of your week. Your month even. That should feel pathetic but, somehow it doesn’t. You want to tell her. She deserves to hear it from time to time without having to filter out the layers of prickliness that you add as second nature, a layer of armor as ever present as your abjurer’s ward. You may not be able to handle naked sentiment but she can. You’ve seen her with her friends. How affectionate they are. You’ve always been taught that loose lips sink ships but you have experience with ship sinking and this prospect fills you with much less dread. You tell her and it’s awkward and fumbling but you manage. Maybe loving people isn’t so different from loving cats.
You have a new job which is perfect because the school year is almost over and, blackmail or no, you aren’t sure how many times you’ll be able to get away with casting Sleep on your class to give yourself a break. Honestly, you should have applied for jobs in Leviathan from the start. Why would pirates care about your sketchy history and lack of credentials? You could teleport yourself to Leviathan every day but that would be a waste of a spell slot when the door to Leviathan is right there in the manor (and if your sister happens to be there too then hey, happy coincidence). While you’re there, you might as well do your laundry. And stay for dinner from time to time. And spend time with your sister in your her room where your runes stand sentinel and your old bunk lays untouched. You don’t think you’re staring but later, as you go to grab a snack from the kitchen your sister throws you a casual, over the shoulder glance. 
“You can just move back in, if you want.”
And would it really be that easy? Just like that? After a year of trying to make a point or a plan or a better version of yourself or whatever? Just like that? 
You remember a year ago. You and your sister and words that will be burned into your mind forever. 
“Despite the fact that you have not earned it, I do love you.”
Just like that. 
You say yes. You stay. 
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www-donck-com · 1 day
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so i am NOT an audio only consumer of FHJY. i see all the character art. however. in my head, bobby dawn looks like this guy
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paranoidpancakes · 2 days
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Anyone ever think that Fig and Fabian’s new shared sibling is gonna for sure out live them by centuries bc they’re gonna be a full elf and get real sad for a sec? Anyone? Just me?
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bloodyshadow1 · 3 days
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fuck you legend lore. 'Riz gukgak is x person to summon the night yorb' how about Riz gukgak slayed the dread dragon Kalvaxus and avenged his father and saved the world.
I love the seven, until junior year they were my favorite d20 season, but it's bs that they get more credit for killing a defeated Kalvaxus then the Bad Kids did for ending his reign of terror before it began. Riz took the sword of shadows and with his mom's help plunged it into Kalvaxus' skull. Then they two of them ate him.
If that's not legendary adventurer behavior than I don't know what is
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kermit-coded · 3 days
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feeling insane about kipperlily copperkettle and lucy frostblade. brennan what do you MEAN she was kipperlily's best friend. what do you mean she was "the only one who 'got it'". what do you mean she was the only one on kipperlily's side about keeping the high five heroes as the party name. brennan when i catch you brennan.
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colombinna · 3 days
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Kipperlilly is ridiculous and petty for many reasons but her thinking that Riz losing his father at a young age dooming him and his mom to grieve and struggle financially for years is an "advantage on being an adventurer" just shows how little of an adventurer she is herself.
If that was true that Riz had an advantage for having his dad connected in conspiracies then Kristen wouldn't have ever gotten to the point where she is now. Her parents were normal and boring as fuck and they also sucked majorly, and none of that stopped Kristen from going out there and making a name for herself and becoming one of the most gifted clerics in the world. I think that as much as she's jealous of Riz, she's angry at Kristen because Kristen is proof that her excuses don't mean a thing and she can't hide behind them to avoid being a decent adventurer and actually pursuing greatness on her own accord.
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tangledinredstring · 2 days
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Kneejerk reaction is to say "Jawbone! Why haven't you reported that a student has expressed murderous thoughts towards another student! Surely, that is your job!"
But that is assuming that he hasn't. I choose to believe that he has, but the problem is that the principal was
1. A robot man that enforced perfect order by literally attacking students that fell outside the line, and then
2. Another student, who almost certainly doesn't have the training and resources required to deal with this problem.
There is, of course, a third option. The position of Vice Principal has limited power, but it is held by an actual adult...
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poisonghoulart · 18 hours
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flamingfoxninja · 3 days
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This makes so much sense why Kipperlilly was asking about how Kristen made Yes! And specifically Where she made Yes! at.
Kristen made a whole new Deity through Arthur Augfort's office and school. As a powerful cleric she reached into the Astral Plane and made life out of her questioning and worship. She temporarily had access to the realm of dead gods to make something from nothing. This was all set in the making from day one.
Jace was working with Kalina and Arianwen to revive The Nightmare King and The Rage Goddess. That's what Ragh saw in front of the office after Prompocolypse. They used Kalvaxis wanting to regain his power as a bigger play to bring back their corrupted and dead deities. A chess piece in a series of steps.
While Kalina was going to bring back The Nightmare King, Jace would work on bringing back The Rage Goddess through Elmville. Kristen already proved that Augefort Academy has access to the Astral Plane. He found and targeted students susceptible to rage, took them to the Mountains of Chaos where the Divine Wedding took place and force the students to make a choice: live for Rage or stay dead.
The Rat Grinders made that choice except for Lucy. Which is a problem because the Need a Cleric. The people the Rat Grinders killed from the school have been Clerics, because with Kristen's method you need a powerful connection to a Deity and Worship to bring life to one.
Lucy worshiped a Giant Goddess, she would have been perfect but she refused.
Yolanda gave up any affiliation to a specific deity, neutral but powerful in worship. She would be a worthy vessel but she refused.
Buddy was brought to always be killed. A follower of Helio, the son of Sol who had corrupted the Goddesses in the first place. He is the grandson of a powerful Cleric, and has that same connection and power within himself. Kipperlilly didn't kill Buddy in panic, that was the plan all along: bypass Obliviti Mori by killing a cleric to meet the Rage Goddess in the Astral Plane, then revive them to spread the word and start the ritual. Buddy was just the first one to accept.
Like in Sylvaire, they are seeding Rage to make their own version of the Nightmare Forest to bring back The Rage Goddess. It's going to bloom and spread, rake over Elmville and the Augefort Academy where the Astral Connection is.
These plans have been started since Freshman Year, and have been defeated all because on goblin was just trying to find his babysitter and another halfling just couldn't handle that.
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astrolamia · 3 days
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Remembering that Sandra Lynn was scouted while she was still in high school grosses me out, all that shit with Bobby Dawn and his wife happened when she was probably 18 and 19. Meaning they fucking wrecked her life before she even got it started.
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