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#fuck the airwrap
kindtim3 · 9 months
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my gf!abby hc's <3
contains : sfw hc's , long/medium haired reader implied , fem!reader implied , readers skin tone/eye color/sex/body type not included! , modern au bc I'm sick in the head pics r always just 4 inspo!
part 1 ☁︎ / part 2 ☁︎ / part 3 ☁︎ (dark vers)
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gf!abby drives a black jeep wrangler !
gf!abby has the comfiest pillows in her car for u <3
gf!abby who bought u a dyson airwrap after u got a professional blowout for a mutual friends engagement party - abby was starstruck.
"how are they supposed to do that at home, too???" she listened so intently to the hairdresser bc she was obsessed w this look on u
gf!abby made a playlist abt u for HERSELF. she listens to it when shes not able to be around u :(
gf!abby lovessss reputation by taylor swift !
gf!abby associates graceland too by pheobe bridgers w u
gf!abby has several different flavors of gum in her car
gf!abby has SERIOUS baby fever.
"baby, PLEASEEEEEE. honey, we could have matching outfits with the baby!!"
gf!abby fucks w a iced chai latte and it HAS to be made by a queer person
gf!abby gets cuteness aggression w u. she'll be hugging u then suddenly she LOVINGLY throws u onto the couch and starts screaming
"YOURE SO ADORABLE I LOVE U SO MUCH I WANT TO EAT U IM IN LOVE!!!!"
gf!abby is typically a good driver but when she brakes hard she puts her arm out against ur chest and a string of "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry" come out her mouth and she's genuinely soooooo sorry :((
gf!abby loves stephanie soo videos. all her content. shes a stephanie soo stan.
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spamgyu · 4 months
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ONE LAST TIME // Seungcheol x Reader oneshot
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DESCRIPTION: It's Christmas and Seungcheol was bored... Who better else to bother than Kkuma's mom? PAIRING: Seungcheol x Reader GENRE: Fluff MASTERLIST
Merry Christmas to all my Cheol Apologists. Here is a quick unedited drabble/oneshot for you guys – a little something for making me laugh.
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"Merry Christmas 🎁🎄😉"
His thumb hovered over the send button, chewing at his lip as he contemplated whether he should go ahead and allow his intrusive thoughts win.
He had seen countless of twitter posts about exes doing this same thing, laughing at each one.
After the fifth one he scrolled past, Seungcheol decided "why the hell not" and scrolled to the bottom of his messages — clicking on the one conversation he had yet to delete.
Along with the name he had yet to change.
He wasn't hanging on to her, no definitely not.
Just didn't think it's that important to delete messages when his phone storage was completely fine.
And why go as far as changing her contact name back to her government name. The honey emoji was cute anyways.
Fuck it.
Holding his breath, he hit send and waited for the screen to flash the words delivered before swiping out of the app.
It was just in good fun, he wasn't expecting a reply — he just wanted to be as annoying as the other men on social media who reached out to their exes after months of no contact..... for the laughs.
He knew there was a higher percentage of her leaving him on read than replying and telling him off; she was always the bigger person.
But Seungcheol was oh so wrong.
In the midst of replying to Jeonghan's instagram story of his family's Christmas feast, her assigned contact name appeared.
"Lmfao stfu" She replied.
But she also hearted the message.
Letting out a soft chuckle, he quickly typed away on his keyboard.
"Damn, not even going to say it back?"
He was just joking.
And he knew she found it funny.
Within seconds her chat bubble appear — she was typing.
"Merry Christmas, Cheol🎄"
"What about my family?"
He was pushing it.
But with all his other friends far too busy with their own family activities to reply to his texts, he was going to keep at it.
"Texted your mom this morning dumbass."
He wasn't aware she was still in contact with his mother.
Though, he should have figured.
They were together for three years.
And his mom had always wanted a daughter.
"Dumbass? At least be nicer to your favorite ex."
"Who said you're my favorite? 🫵🏼"
"I just know 😉"
"You're currently at the bottom on my list. At least my other ex got me a present."
Bottom of her list.
She had only one other ex.
And he didn't count.
High school boyfriends don't count. Especially if they broke up right after graduation.
Those were just test runs.
More importantly, it was Seokmin. And he gives presents to everyone.
He had a big heart and wants to be everyone's friend.
"Was it a tea set again?"
"Shut up lol"
"Send me your list, I'll get you something."
"Dyson Airwrap 😈"
He knew she was joking.
But wouldn't it be funny, if he actually did it?
Switching apps, Seungcheol typed into his search bar, clicking the first result that had pooped up.
He still had her address memorized.
Seungcheol hit the complete button, and locked his phone as bounded for the dining room — checking to see if his mom and dad had finally set up tonight's feast.
He was just about to pick at the cheeseboard his mother set up on the table when the familiar sound of a facetime call blared from the phone in his hand began to ring — it was her.
She must have gotten the confirmation email.
"Wassup?" He swiped the accept button — throwing a cheese cube in his mouth.
It had been a while since he had last seen her, being blocked on all her social media accounts and all.
She was really persistent on keeping the no contact rule after the break up.
Even when they took turns taking care of their shared dog, Kkuma — opting to use Wonwoo as their puppy's form of transportation and point of contact.
He protested each time their non-government assigned custody switch off was set to happen — trudging to his car with Kkuma in tow.
Wonwoo claimed they were far worse than actual divorced parents — complaining more considering Seungcheol technically had custody of him and the dog.
Seungcheol couldn't help but bite back a smile as he watched her from behind the screen — making note of how cute she looked when she was annoyed.
He's allowed to think she's cute.
They were broken up but that doesn't mean she wasn't attractive.
"You're joking, right?"
"What are you talking about?" Seungcheol blinked.
She could see right through his act, giving him the finger.
"Hey, that's not nice." He laughed.
"You're crazy, you know that?"
"Am I your favorite yet?"
"No!"
"I'll buy you another one." He threatened.
"Cheol!"
"Yes?" He answered sweetly, making her lips curl in annoyance.
He always did enjoy getting her nerves.
Seeing her huff and puff had always been his favorite part of his day.
Especially when she would pout after taking a joke a little too far only for him to kiss it all better — not that he could do that now.
He's allowed to reminisce on old memories. At least, he'll allow himself just this one time during the holidays.
"Fine, what do you want?"
You.
Seungcheol shook his head. "Nothing."
"Come on, let me get you something."
He pursed his lips, thinking — he had almost anything he could ask for.
And if he did end up thinking of anything, he could simply swipe his card and purchase it himself.
There was one thing he did want, but be knew it would be a selfish thing to ask of her.
Settling for the next best thing, a smile crept on his face."What perfume do you use again?"
"You want my perfume?" She raised her brows.
He missed the way she smelled.
The remaining item he had that held traces of her no longer had that signature scent — having it been nearly a nine months since she had lounged around his place in his hoodie.
He would have purchased it himself, but the thought of him going out of the way to purchase her scent only for him to spray it on her favorite hoodie and her side of the bed seemed pathetic.
But considering she offered....
"Why not? I like the smell." He shrugged.
Sighing, she swiped out of their call — allowing for his face to minimize and settle for a corner in her screen as she quickly typed away on her phone.
She still had his address memorized as well.
Seungcheol couldn't be more grateful that Apple had changed their phone setting and no longer pause the person on the other side of the line's video when they swiped away — watching as she brought the device closer to her face, her brows naturally furrowing as she focused in her task.
"Done." She sang, clicking back into their call.
It wasn't long before he got the confirmation email, his eyes widening at the transaction breakdown.
"Why the hell is your perfume $250!?" His mouth hung in shock.
It was no wonder she had always scolded him for spraying a little too much when she allowed him to have some.
Curse Le Labo and their damn prices.
"It's worth it."
"I would hope so, it cost almost as much as a hairdryer!"
"You asked for it!" She laughed.
It was music to his ears.
"Is that y/n?" His mom's scurried over to him, wiping her hands on her apron. Seungcheol moved the camera to fit the both of them on screen, the smile on his face growing larger – as if it could get any more since their call began.
"Merry Christmas, mom!" She waived.
Mom.
When he had first introduced her to his parents, it didn't take long for them to warm up to her – insisting that she referred to them as mom and dad because "you two will be married soon, anyways."
Oh, they were so wrong.
"Stop by tomorrow for leftovers yeah?" The older lady asked.
"Mom..." He trailed off, not wanting to pressure the girl behind the screen – although, they did agree that Kkuma was to ring in the New Year with her because he had a snowboard trip planned with his friends.
She can pick her up early instead of having to ask Wonwoo.
"I'd love to." She smiled warmly.
How was he going to find someone who got on well with his mom?
Trick question.... he didn't want to.
"Perfect." His mother clapped, before excusing herself back into the kitchen.
"Guess I'm picking our daughter up early." She mumbled.
Our daughter.
"Guess I'll be seeing you too."
"That can be arranged."
"Come on, it's been months. I think we can see each other now." He half-heartedly teased.
The anger had subsided and the wounds that once kept them up at night had grown numb – the only memory of their past were now re-runs of the good times. It was as if their brain completely disregarded the fighting and the heartache that they had gone through in the last few months of their relationship.
They were now.... okay.
"I don't know, Cheol."
"Come on. One last time."
It was almost like he was pleading for her – the playful tone between the two have shifted.
He watched as she nervously switched holding her phone from one hand to the other, chewing at the skin inside her cheek.
He shouldn't have mentioned it.
But he was already far from the line they had drawn between them – swearing to never cross.
"I miss you." He continued. "It's a neutral setting. We can have breakfast with my parents."
"One last time?"
"Promise."
He broke that promise within a few weeks – picking up Kkuma at her apartment instead of his friend. She nearly stumbled back when she swung the door open and saw his smiling face – holding a paper bag containing her favorite pastries.
It wasn't long before he would show up at her door again and again; and she wasn't complaining.
They swore they were just friends.
Two exes who were coparenting – remaining cordial for the sake of their dog.
That was, until she had agree to spend Christmas with him at his family home – one last time.
They should have known his mother was scheming, she was a little too cheerful when she had greeted them at the door.
"Oh, will you look at that!" She gasped, pointing up above them as they kicked their shoes off.
The two exchanged looks before looking up at the doorway where his mother taped two leaves – a chuckle escaping his lips in an instant.
"What do you say?" He raised a brow at her. "One last time?"
"Or maybe a couple more," Y/n copied his playful tone. "if... you want."
"Oh, I definitely want." Seungcheol wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer – planting a quick peck on her lips.
His mother was there.
And so was their daughter.
"Merry Christmas." She giggled.
Thank god for that damn twitter trend.
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oneforthemunny · 3 months
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Modern!Eddie, hair rollers, fluff (bonus point if their all giggly In this one!)
"Wait, wait, wait!" You cackle, holding the AirWrap in one hand, a hair roller in the other. "Hold still!"
"It's hot!" Eddie flinched, pulling his head away from the barrel of the Dyson. "You're burning my scalp!"
"You'll be fine." A roll of your eyes, biting back a smirk. "Quit being such a baby."
"I'm not, but, babe, this shit hurts-"
"-Ok, I'll do the cold shot and then put the roller in." You shake your head, switching the flip to the dryer, pulling it through the curl. "Just quit moving."
Eddie pouted, inked arms crossed over his chest, glaring at you through the mirror. "I look fucking stupid." He grinned, shaking his head, earning a click of annoyance from you. "I better look fucking great."
"You will." You bit back a smile. "Have a blowout these other bitches will be begging for."
"You know I bought this for you, right?" Eddie scoffed, motioning to the Dyson.
A fucking AirWrap, whatever that was, the girl at Sephora swore you'd love it, and she wasn't wrong. You had loved it, eyes lighting up when you opened it on Christmas, squealing about how he spent wayyy too much. Like that was a thing, he'd spend every penny in his pocket on you.
He had been so proud that you loved it, smug and heart swelling and boasting. Until you insisted using it on him. To practice.
"Ok," Your tongue poked out in concentration, an adorable habit that had Eddie swooning. "They just have to set for a moment."
"Then I'll be beautiful?" Eddie cooed sillily, leaving you laughing.
"Yeah, something like that." Your eyes lit up with challenge. "At least your hair will be."
"Oh?" Eddie clicked, grabbing you by your waist, fingers digging into your side, tickling you so you screeched. "That's how we're gonna be?"
"Eddie, stop!" You shrieked between breathy laughs, fighting to get out of his grasp. "You're going to fuck up your hair!"
Fifteen minutes later, you were pulling the rollers, grinning at the blown out curls from the rollers. "Look at you." You cooed, smiling at him in the mirror, fluffing the curl. "You're the it girl."
"Fuck yeah." Eddie smirked, pushing the curl up so it spiraled in his hand, letting it fall. "Feel like a Victoria's Secret model. Ready for the runway."
"Yeah?" You tilted your head to the side. "You want my lingerie? Really give me a show?"
"Ooh, that sounds fun." Eddie smirked, hovering over you, curls tall and voluminous. "You'd like that wouldn't you? Freak." Eddie teased, nipping your bottom lip before kissing you fully.
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tell me this isn't airwrap curls lol.
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jaydizzel2844 · 6 months
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Marie x Jordan Drabble
No. 7
Marie opened her dorm room door to find Emma on her knees routing through her clothes drawers, which wasn’t surprising, and Jordan lying out on her bed in their smaller form, which was.
“I couldn’t have sworn my blue top was in here somewhere. Oh hey Marie.” Emma said finally noticing her arrival.
“Hey beautiful.” Jordan said from the bed.
“Jordan’s helping me pick an outfit for tonight.” Emma said answering Marie’s unasked question.
“Not everyone can look as effortlessly hot and cool as I do.” They said with a smirk.
“Oh effortlessly?” Marie asked in a teasing tone. “Hey babe, how long did you spend on your hair this morning?”
“I don’t want to answer that question. “ Jordan said with a smile.
They both know that Jordan has a 5 step routine for both lengths of their hair with their Dyson airwrap. It takes a lot of effort to look effortlessly good.
“Found it!” Emma exclaimed holding up the top she was looking for, Marie is more focused on the absolute bomb site that she has turned her side of the room into.
“Nice, that with the black jeans will look awesome.” Jordan said looking over at Emma and then immediately looking away and focusing on their fingernails when Emma started stripping.
“What are you wearing tonight?” Emma asked her, pulling the blue top over her head. “Need to borrow something?”
“No, I was thinking my new red shirt, not sure.” She said pulling out the top in question.
“Try it on.”
***
“It’s a little boob-y?” Marie said, adjusting the collar of the low cut shirt.
“I think you look great.” Jordan said, sitting up on the bed.
“It is,” Emma said ignoring Jordan. “But not too boob-y I think. You will probably get a lot more attention though. Do we need to worry about Jordan having a possessive jealous freak out?”
It was clearly a joke but Jordan jumped in to defend themselves. “Excuse me, I am an adult who can control myself. If anyone does anything inappropriate or makes her uncomfortable I will hit them but that’s beside the point.“
“Calm down, she’s messing with you.” Marie said, going over to give them a quick kiss. “I’ll wear it, just need to change my pants and I’m ready to go.”
“Great, It’ll be a nice change of pace to have your partner spend the whole night staring at your tits rather than you ass.” Emma joked.
“Hey! I’m right here.” Jordan said trying, and failing, to sound offended and cover their laugh.
Emma laughed in response.
“Well your partner fucks puppets.” Was Jordan’s comeback.
“No he doesn’t. “ Emma said, threw giggles.
“Yeah he does, spends his whole day putting his hands inside them, he probably puts his dick in there too.”
“Can you two please stop?” Marie asks.
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360iris · 6 months
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I need Marie to do me a solid and post footage of Jordan fucking it up with that Dyson Airwrap Multi-styler in front of the mirror every morning because the fact that it’s canon they do not play about styling a mean bob or getting a nice curl going with strategic consistency is dhdhfh
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suzie-shooter · 11 months
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Screaming Meals - Le Mans commentary highlights 10.06.23
 J: It's quarter to three, race is due to start at three o'clock. Obviously, you know, told Marcus to get here at two. C: Still not here.
J: I think the Cadillacs should have a good race. I mean it broke down in qualifying yesterday, it couldn't manage to do 45 minutes and now it's got to do 24 hours.
C: Roland Garros, women's finals, at the moment. J: Who's in that? C: Swiatek and [...] I don't know the other person. J: I went to school with someone called Swiatek. [...] But he was called Matthew so it's probably not him.
C: Why am I eating? Bit of a rough morning really. J: To say the least. Clem's parked up on struggle street.
C: Hoping for a moist affair.
C: Damn, my ramen's going to go everywhere. J: Ramen's going to be great ASMR as well, slopping and slurping everywhere like some kind of deranged ignoramus.
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J: "What were Marcus' thoughts on James' last stream?" I think he quite liked it - I don't think he watched it 'cause he was racing so I don't know if he has too many thoughts on that stream. Nothing really happened, and yeah from his point of view he was a bit busy, so...
C: "Did Marcus like the Detroit track?" J: He loved it actually. C: D'you know what, you can ask him when he arrives, but, fucking, probably won't arrive. J: He's not officially late for another seven minutes.
C: So James is doing a 24 hour stream. J: I'm not.
C: Great mouthfeel. If I could paint a picture with words for ya,  it's ah, it's really good. J: I've said it before and I'll say it again, you have a real career waiting for you in food blogs.
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C: I'm gonna take a couple of the old chillies out there. J: What an absolute - front cartilage. C: No, listen, I'm a backbone. Oh! Front cartilage, that's the opposite of a backbone. J: There you go, well done.
C: Loving the shorts too. J: Thank you. They were on sale. In 2014. C: Where'd you get those? J: I believe these are Billabong actually? C: Billabong? I didnt take you for a surfer. J: Yeah, I actually, I thought about learning surfing in September of 2017 and then quite quickly had the realisation that I was due to move to London in 2 months and it would be absolutely pointless.
J: [Marcus has] let us down, he's let himself down,  but more importantly - C: He's shaving his legs. J: He's let you guys down.
J: Let's see if Bourdais fucks it. C: That's not very nice James.
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J: I'd love to see a replay of it, 'cause it was actually quite funny [...] oh it'd really tear your undies, on lap one of Le Mans, to put it in the wall like that.
C: Yeah, no, Dyson Airwrap, allows me to really straighten my hair in the mornings there and, er, allow me to have a bit more of a - bit more control.   J: Control's important. Just tell that to Jack Aitken.  
C: We've just got a slight issue really, getting new guests on. J: Yeah, no one seems to be keen. C: No one seems to be keen  these days. J: I'm not sure what's happened...
J: I left for Monaco, and I packed two hats and I returned with four. And I didn't even buy one.
C: Not only is it absolutely massive but it's also bent. (Alain Prost's nose)
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C: Shall we give Marcus a call, see what he's up to? [...] Yes mate, you've got 750 people waiting for you to arrive, but you seem to be 40 minutes late [...] ah, fuck him. *hangs up*
C: Thing is, we promised Marcus and he's just not quite delivered. J: Yeah...I feel sorry for the woman who ends up with him.
C: A lot of people asking whether I should be sitting their Business A Levels - I actually participated - partake - ah - partook in the business exam a couple of years ago. J: Must have done well in your English one as well.
J: As an organisation, two thirds of us - well, three quarters with Rory - do care about you, the fans. Marcus is a scoundrel and a traitor. C: He's a sort of a Han Solo character. J: What, he gets it on with his sister? C: Yes James. J: I'm not accusing anyone of anything there. I regret I said that actually, but I've said it now.  Okay, so they're saying I was wrong there. C: You've fucked it up again.
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J: I'm thinking that we're gonna need to reach out to the Serbian star and maybe start some kind of merch line: Novalak Djokovic.
J: So hot as well. Turned himself into a real DILF actually, Dan Carter. C: Absolute DILF. Dan Carter. Who's the biggest DILF for you? J: Ah what, just full stop, or in a certain area, or field? C: Full stop. J: It's probably got to be, um, Ryan Reynolds. C: Yeah, I was going to go with Ryan Reynolds. J: Yeah, he's a total DILF. C: Toto Wolff, in the comments. J: I feel like he'd be pretty boring in the sack. Patrick Dempsey, I mean you want to talk about hot old dudes and Le Mans, he's obviously got this team racing here.
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J: Kimi Raikkonen there getting an honourable mention for, I'm assuming the DILF chat. C: Ah Kimi - pretty -  I mean -  probably not a - I wouldn't say he's a very vocal lover. J: Nah , he'd be a very silent lover. He'd be - I mean similar to Formula 1 media he'd communicate only in grunts and groans I believe. Very monotonous in his delivery of his love.
C: "Josef Newgarden qualifies as a DILF now." J: He does technically qualify as a DILF if - if he floats your boat, and you know, just speaking for myself there he's certainly floating mine.
J: I'm sure somebody knows what's going on here but it's not us. C: I've got no fucking idea.
(Screaming Meals technical gremlins make an appearance, giving us a brief glimpse of their kitchen)
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J: Fixed! Fixed! How good! Just like the Formula 2 championship. C: I'm distancing myself so far away from that comment.
J: Where were we? I think we were talking about DILFs? C: Tom Hardy. DILF? J: Yeah, he's actually not my flavour of crisps to be honest, actually, Tom Hardy. He's quite short. I mean, you know, I'm not on the market, I'm just saying. C: You never cease to amaze me.
C: "Marcus being a male bimbo again." J: That would imply that at some stage he's actually stoppped being - 'cause you've said again - that implies that he's stopped being a male bimbo, whereas he's not.
J: "Marcus is Ken coded" - do you know what that means? C: Nope.
J: Clem's shades not quite dark enough to hide the fact that his eyes are now closed.
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*Clem keels over sideways* J: Seem to have momentarily lost Clement Novalak, but I'm sure he will return.
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J: 4.09 arrival predicted from Marcus Armstrong. C: Which is currently another 15 minutes. J: That's actually bang on 69 minutes late from Marcus Armstrong, you'd expect nothing less to be perfectly frank.
C: "Take a shot each time Clem yawns" - you're gonna be dead.
C: You're looking pretty moist.
C: Max Fewtrell. Doing the cooking. Probably doing a stream on cooking. J: Caged in his gimp suit on a leash.
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J: I've been getting vastly mixed reviews on my long locks. C: It sort of looks a bit pubey at the back. J: Ally hates it. Ally fucking hates it. Which is why I'm keeping it.
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C: First time he's actually text me since - hold on hold on - 17th May. J: There's a text string of Clem - I hope you don't mind me exposing this - there's three texts in a row from Clem to Fewtrell going - "Brother, I have an idea, a good one too" and he's just blanked him, he's not replied. Wise man. When Clement Novalak texts you to say he's got a good idea, don't fuckin' respond.
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J: It really gets deep inside my goat. C: You do have a nice goat.
J [talking about buzzcuts]: Do you think it has like the same effect as like your downstairs, where it makes it look much bigger? C: I wouldn't want to have a massive head. J: Yeah exactly, that's what I'm thinking. C: 'Cause then it would make my massive honker look even larger. J: Yeah, no you don't want that. I can't afford my honker to look much bigger. I'm talking about my nose.
J: You do a good impression of a whipcrack actually. C: I just spat all over myself. J: Tune into Screaming Meals and watch two guys spit all over each other.
C: If I get a Pret [coffee] I'm gonna throw my phone out the window. J: Actually no you shouldn't do that it might kill someone. We're 28 floors up.
J: Actually I'm going to put the shot glasses in the freezer. Do you think I should put one in for his - his friend as well - do you think she's with him?
J: Yes it is a massive bottle of Corona, your eyes aren't deceiving you, Clem's not actually that small.
J: Is that our doorbell? I've never heard that before.
J: I had dinner with Marcus and a friend of his yesterday - can't remember her name - and he was still trying to insist that he's 6 ft tall.
J: "James show us the snazzy shorts you're wearing"
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M: How are ya? C: You're three minutes late so that's  three shots. J: No, no, no you're an hour and thirteen minutes late.
M: How are you feeling? C: Pretty rooted. Where are we going tonight?
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M: I'm not having any shots. I'm not drinking today. I've got to do some stuff later.
C: You disappoint me. M: I know. C: Every day. M: Yeah, I know.
J: My back is absolutely destroyed from carrying this shit. C: Yeah James, you do carry.
C: Marcus? M: Yo. J: Where do you stand on DILFs?
J: Up in the hypercar field it's been real bumper to bumper. C: C&B, bumper to bumper. J: Is C&B meaning what I think it means?
J: I hate to be fussy but could you two bastards move over a bit? C: I need to lie back and have a wee sleep.
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M: Did you tell them we did a pod yesterday? J: No. M: Were we keeping that a secret? J: Yeah, we were.
M: Is this slaving away? I can't think of anything better than sitting back, watching the race, feet up on the table. C: No, get your grippers out! M: Oh the grippers are out by the way everyone. C: Disgusting, piece of filth. J: [...] five minutes, and it's underwear off, shoes off, grease in the hair.
J: "Marcus is raw-dogging his shoes" - yes!
M: By the way I have actually - I've started washing my hair everyone. You'll find out in the pod. C: And wearing deoderant. M: And wearing deoderant as well. C: And do you know what, you look better and I'm starting to think that - M: I am better. J: You might even just taste better. C: Pfffff what the fuck?? J: I was just going with the senses there. You said look, the obvious next choice was taste.
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M: When we went to Long Beach weren't we meant to do an intro video? J: We wanted to do something like that, but we did run out of time because we were being cancelled and you had an indycar race to do.
M: Do you still have this as your background? J: HoyteyJ and Minougey? Hoytey. C: You've taken Hoytey off yours M: I've had to change mine. C: Yeah, I know why. J: What is it now? M: It's a dog. J: Well that's a bit rude. C: That's a bit rude. *James screams* M: It's literally like - no - it's a labrador, it's literally a little baby labrador, no! C: Oh shit yeah [chat's] just gone off. M: Come on!
C: I don't have a CV. I arrive, I say - Clement Novalak, enchante.
J: What? M: Heart rate J: Is 34? M: Yes. J: Are you alive? M: When I'm sleeping it dips down. J: When you're asleep your heart rate is 34? M: Yes. My Oura ring stops counting when it goes under 33. J: Does it assume you're dead?
C: It was the first night I had redbull vodka in about six months [...] I was doing a long distance run mate, in my bed. J: Don't need to know any more details than that.
C: Can you fucking - leave your grippers away from my grippers? J: Yeah, that's quite aggressive. C: With that fucking massive toenail. M: I just wanna play footsie [...] yeah, we're playing footsies everybody.
J: Imagine having the audacity to leave people waiting an hour and a quarter, and then just being on your phone.
M: Clem are you okay mate? Good.
J: Fuckin' hell, you selling tickets there mate? M: Gun show there. J: Watch Marcus now get competitive and not be able to resist getting his guns out.
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J: What's going to run out first, our countdown to 22 hours, or the iPad battery? That might be the most interesting battle we've got going on here.
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J: Thanks so much for sticking with us for the last couple of hours [...] we don't know anything that's going on in the race and we've made almost no effort to find out.
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unrealisticlea · 1 year
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I’m OBSESSED with the choices in last episode
- the first thing he remembers is Eddie calling him “cowboy”. The second thing he remembers is the Chris screaming in the tsunami.
- Buck literally thinking “you know who would believe that I’m trapped in an alternate reality? Chimney” and being RIGHT
- Thunder by Imagine Dragons playing when he goes to Chimney’s house
- “I know why your name is Chimney” and CUT. So good. I hope we never find out why his name is Chimney.
- They literally said “Buck is the only reason Bobby is alive. He’s also the only reason Eddie didn’t lose his son after a nasty custody battle btw” and I’m supposed to be normal about this????
- A guy goes into a coma and the entire A-shift doesn’t show up for work for like a week.
- That’s why the firefighter who went to Maddie’s house looked so mad, he was probably thinking “these freaks are gonna be MIA for god-knows-how-long. why are they so weird about each other”.
- Eddie looked sooooooo bad. Props to Ryan Guzman for looking like he hadn’t showered or slept in a week for the entire episode.
- we thought Eddie was gonna bring Chris to say goodbye but somehow it’s even worse???????? Chris getting so mad Carla had no choice but bring him to the hospital and then saying “you HAVE TO come back” because he has no choice, there’s no way he would leave them.
- Stoic-always-keep-his-cool-Eddie-Diaz randomly crying in the background A+++
- Everyone looks like they’re ready to jump off a bridge if things go south and May looks like she just shot a Dyson Airwrap commercial
- BOBBY. Oh my god Bobby.
- “Mom brought two kids into the marriage. You brought one”. Canon “Bobby Nash is Evan “Buck” Buckley parental figure” ao3 tag??? This FUCKING SHOW. I have no words. This is all i’ve ever wanted since Season 1 Episode 1.
- Sorry to insist on this but THAT’S HIS SON
- Buck decides to leave a world where his parents love him because he can’t save Bobby there. THAT’S HIS DAD. Buck Nash 4Ever.
- I already said it. I literally don’t give a shit about the Buckley parents. me @ their redemption arc: argue with the wall. Same goes for Chim’s dad. I have no idea why they decided to go with the “blood is thicker than water” stuff but that’s very conservative of them and I hate it. I’m gonna pretend the last 5-6 minutes don’t exist.
- Who did Buck go home with? I have no idea but probably Bobby or Eddie.
- i‘ m sorry but Buck running with Fix You playing in the background was too funny. And that’s what you missed on Glee.
- His imagination gives him Chris who’s looking for Eddie to convince him to stay in the dream. This means absolutely nothing.
- I was terrified what bullshit lesson he was gonna have to learn to wake up but what he had to learn was: you don’t have to fix everything, you just have to be Buck.
- Once again, Bobby and Buck relationship has my whole heart <333
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milfzatannaz · 1 year
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some misc johnzee headcanons:
- zee is very high maintenance so she probably has very intricate self care rituals. I like to imagine her meticulously curling her hair with the 600$ Dyson Airwrap and John looming in the bathroom watching, being generally unhelpful and fiddling with her shit
- zee hardly apologizes, ever. When she snaps at John she conveys her remorse thru other means. But sometimes in bed she’ll be like. “I’m sorry I called you stupid six years ago. In my defense, you were being stupid.”
- John only says “I love you” when he thinks zee is asleep. She isn’t, but she doesn’t want him to know that
- she steals his shirts and he steals her robes
- if she’s feeling very angsty and mad she’ll pull out her Foxglove CDs and that’s when John knows he’s in fucking trouble
- John loves to zip her dresses up when she’s all dressed up for somewhere fancy
- when zee is bored she likes to cut and style John’s hair to be more tidy. However she goes utterly bonkers when it’s long enough to tuck behind his ears
- John is no cook but he secretly likes how much zee looks forward to him making breakfast
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narutosfrogwallet · 2 years
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also what the fuck was up with kabuto’s hair during the power arc. dude has never had wavy hair ever before in his life?? was he just getting up every morning and doing some Soft Beachy Waves with his Dyson Airwrap(tm)? i need answers
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8a8y · 4 months
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my tiktok feed is full of dyson airwrap videos cause i let a video about it play on repeat for like 3 minutes while trying to find the eyeballs that popped out of my fucking head upon learning that it’s 700 DOLLARSSSSSSS
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bluegrasshole · 1 year
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I don’t want to do my nails every week I don’t want to do my eyebrows I don’t want to get fake eyelashes I don’t want a fucking dyson airwrap I don’t want to contour I don’t want to snatch my waist or lose weight I don’t want to do any of it!!!!!!!!!!!!! Leave me alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I got a Dyson Airwrap for Christmas and I’m starting to get the hang of it. After I did my hair this morning I literally shouted “holy fucking shit,” which my husband thought was HILARIOUS. 
I’ve gotten three compliments from my patients and office staff on my hair this morning.  I feel very vindicated.
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kmp78 · 7 months
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"It’s. A. Fucking. BLOWDRIER!!!!!!! 🤦🏼‍♀️"
A 600 US $ blowdryer! But hey that girl made a 30sec clip to show us how to use a hairclip. What to expect!
She should film a reel styling JL infamous mane with the airwrap that I would watch!! Thinnie can dogsit Sheppy and Sush while Slothy and Mercer nap away. Make it happen, Cara!
Well CS and Thinster are totes besties so why not! 😂👩🏽‍🤝‍👩🏻
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you-wanna-know · 1 year
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Who’s fucking buying me the Dyson airwrap?!? I’m sick of burning myself with my revlon volume brush
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23 feb 2023
I'm on the verge of tears and it's so stupid. I feel misunderstood and unheard. It's 11:45pm on a thursday. It's friday tomorrow, sam's day off. I have a bridal trial tomorrow morning at 11. Before that, I have to make teas and coffees for me and sam- a friday tradition, I also have to take the ring doorbell off and reconnect it to the wifi- an absolute ballache of a job that I've put off since tuesday but I have to do this because I won't be able to hear the doorbell when I'm in the cabin.
After the trial, I'll also have to sort out lunch which will probably be Maccies because I'd like to go to the sunbeds- very bad I know, but is 8 minutes in a controlled environment better than hours on a beach with an unknown amount of harmful rays? After that, I need to go to my mums and pick up a bag that I'd like to wear- it's a tiny DKNY backpack. THEN, go to the shops and pick up bits for tomorrow's breakfast.
From there, I'd like to go to my friends house and pick up a curler that she borrowed. I need this for the next day but maybe I can do without it.
So yeah, I already have a busy day ahead running errands, and also looking after this man child of a boyfriend. OH and I have to be home for 4pm because I have a client in at 4:30pm in the cabin.
So it's a stressful day ahead. It's also Meg's hen do the day after and I'm picking her up at about 10:30, getting her back to mine for 11am, spend two hours to get her ready- no time to do myself so I'll have to get ready before I pick her up which takes me an hour and a half so I'l have to get ready at 8 be done by 9:30 and be in the car for 10. latest.
As if that wasn't enough to drive me to tears, Sam has said at 11:45pm, that we're going to spoons with 3 of his friends. One of which is a girlfriend and sam does the typical 'she's only going because you're going' ...excuse me? At what point did I say I'm going?? But now, I can't say no because of that insufferable desire to be liked. Old habits die hard, I guess.
So now I have to go to spoons for 'a bit of food and a couple drinks' at 6:30 tomorrow. Which means I have an hour max to get myself presentable. I'll have to wash my hair and airwrap it, that takes me about an hour itself. I also need to do my makeup which granted can only take me 5 minutes. And I need to figure out what to wear. I can save time by finding something to wear now, at 12:01am but I'm too overwhelmed by my schedule to do that right now.
Also the hair washing fucks me off. I'll have to wash my hair at 5pm instead of 10pm like I had planned. This wouldn't be an issue except those 5 hours really do make a difference. nI have oily hair so if I wash it too early, even 5 hours early, it's not going to make Saturday all day which is why I want to wash my hair as late as possible. I have lah extensions on too. Right now it's been 10 days since my last infill, these russian fans are coming out so quick. I'll wash my face tonight, lashes fall out. I have to wear makeup for this bridal trial tomorrow, so when I wash my face to go to bastard spoons, lashes will fall out. Then when I wash my face after spoons, LASHES WILL FALL OUT AND THEY WONT MAKE IT TO SATURDAY. And chances are I'll have to wash my hair again that night because they all fucking smoke so I either sit on a big ass table by myself on a Friday night in a busy pub in my hometown full of my old classmates, or stand outside in the freezing cold while my freshly washed hair marinates in that disgusting tobacco smoke mixed with some tutti fruiti vape bull shit. Fuck I miss drugs. Drugs are very very bad and a very slippery slope for me but at least they were odourless.
That's fine, sam says I don't have to go. Oh well actually he says 'Well don't go then!' after I huffed and puffed about how it's not fair that he's just signed me up for this. So lets explore that option.
If I don't go, I'll probably still have to take sam to spoons and pick him up which I can't be fucked to do cos if I do that I might as well fucking stay. If I don't play my signature role of taxi man, sam will stay out much much later. 'No I'll be home by 10' An absolute lie that he's told over and over again. There is no chance because 2 of those friends are boyfriend and girlfriend so they'll dip real early. That leave Sam and his 1 friend who is going through another dark patch because his girlfriend left him and he'll 'die alone' Cue a very unsupportive get-a-grip eyeroll. I'm a big advocate for mental health (especially considering my own very apparent fucked mental health) but I mean dude, this happens all the time, and he seems to find the younger weird unsociable girls. This one? Never heard a fucking peep out of her. Actually I didn't hear anything out of the other ones either tbf.
Anyways, his friends mum won't pick him up until 12am, and she'll be the one taking Sam home. Theres an option for sam to say 'ah I got to be home early' to his friend but he wont. He'll stay with his friend until 12am because he can't say no to anyone (except me, in fact that's all he says to me these days) I'll be at home, probably not eating dinner, clean hair and waiting for him to come home like a dog. I don't sleep well when he's not here.
I'm exhausted just thinking about it. Saturday is the Hen Do which I've obviously taken lead on, it's literally 12 hours of wearing the 'preppy excited I'm- not- tired' mask and my social battery is very easily drained and it's recharge time is more than insufficient.
So to conclude...
Don't Go:
-FOMO
-Won't sleep until sam strolls home at an ungodly hour when I have an even bigger day coming
-Will have clean hair
-Don't need to figure out an outfit
-Don't need to play pretend and make conversation. Conversation that I can't even hear by the way, it's so fucking loud in spoons.
Go:
-Lashes won't last
-Hair will be fucked
-Have to find an outfit
-Very high stress end to a very high stress day
-Very tight timing schedule
-Lose a few years worth of hearing because it's so loud
-Risk seeing people from school, so you have to look good
-Spend money that you for sure do not have
Honestly, fuck it. I don't want to fucking go. /but then I'll be letting people down. If I don't go this time, it might mean they won't invite me ever again because why invite her? she always says no anyway.
Ideally, it would be best if Sam doesn't sign me up to these in the first place. All he needs to do tomorrow is play his fucking games, poo pick, shower with his 14 in 1, and go to spoons. He wouldn't even need to do the laundry because I've either done it or he's got enough to last him a few days. Which means I'll get the 'please can you put the washing in while I'm at work?' which kind of translates to me 'I work full time, you do housework okay?'
...No, not okay. but you weren't really asking me anyway.
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drewstarkey · 2 years
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blushed - r.c 🌅
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- in which you finally made the move on your forever crush -
rafe + y/n
2.3k of mutual pining, tension and nervous looks
mentions of alcohol, kissing
a/n: aaaah i wrote something for the first time in ages. it is kind of slow burn for as far as that's possible for a 2.3k blurb ahaha anyways. i was inspired by this scene from skam (starting at 12:18) so if you want to watch that i highly encourage you to do so!! i also want to thank @marveloussensations for helping me out when i got stuck <333 she is an angel.
Rafe has had the biggest crush on you for ages, and you have had the biggest crush on him for ages. Yet you two have never made a move. Your friends are getting tired of the flirty remarks and tension shared between the two of you.
“Hello to you too Y/N” he smiled, snapping you out of your thoughts. “You know you can just take a picture, it’ll last longer”.
You rolled your eyes, “Oh come here, Rafe, don’t act like you didn’t miss me!” Once you hugged him you whispered in his ear “I saw the drunk dm’s on insta before you unsent them”.
His cheeks flushed pink, something you missed seeing so much. “So can we get some drinks?” Kelce asked. “Yeah, It’s getting hot out here” Topper said while looking at you and Rafe. Now it was your turn to blush. Fuck. Okay focus, this crush was over. You are not crushing on Rafe fucking Cameron anymore. Something that’s easier said than done. You gave them the drinks, and Rafe vaguely mentioned something about a party but before you could ask what he said other people on the course were calling you over.
Once you clocked out, and checked your phone you saw a message from Kelce.
Once you clocked out, and checked your phone you saw a message from Kelce.
party at rafe’s tomorrow - 19:21
pls come i will not survive without you 🥺 - 19:21
neither will rafe actually - 19:22
Parties at Tannyhill were always eventful to say the least. You texted back that you’ll think about it, knowing you will most definitely be there.
The next day your high school best friend Florence, or as everyone calls her, Flossie came over to get ready with you. The smell of make up, perfume and a dyson airwrap fill the room. Several pieces of clothing lay on the ground.
“God, I feel like I’m 16 again, getting ready for a party at Tannyhill” Flossie said while deciding between two dresses. You sat on the bed doing your hair and sighed deeply, “tell me about it”.
Flossie turned around and gave you a questioning look “what’s wrong?”. Sometimes you hated that she knew you so well.
“I mean just the whole-” you started.
Flossie gasped, “oh my god, don’t tell me you are still into him”.
You looked up at her, opening your mouth to start defending yourself before you were cut off once again.
“Stop, don’t even try to act like that’s not true” she laughed, “Jesus christ you know he’s actually into you too right? like I have literally never seen that man blush for someone else."
You smiled. Flossie was right, you knew that. This thing between you and Rafe has been going on for as long as you can remember.
“I just really don’t wanna mess up the friendship between us” you said. Once again your friend laughed “Friends don’t flirt the way you two do.”
“Whatever, just shut up and help me choose a top” you said while holding up two different ones. “Definitely the green one” Flossie smiled, she knew it was one of Rafe’s favourites.
When you were walking to the party you were happy that you went for platform loafers instead of heels. One, because you saw Flossie struggling and two because it was actually quite a cold summer evening.
You could hear the faint sound of deep bass music in the distances and the closer you got, the stronger the smell of alcohol became.
Flossie opened the familiar fence door you have walked through too many times. You were immediately welcomed by Kelce who already had a drink for the both of you in his hands. You thanked him while scanning the area. You recognized so many people you hadn’t seen in ages. Nick from math class, Sophia from art, Lucas from track.
And Rafe. Next to the beer pong table, with Allison of course. Some things never fucking change. “Hey Kelce, didn’t you say he won’t survive without me?” You got Kelce’s attention as he looked over to where you were looking. “He looks perfectly fine, if you ask me” and as you said this Allison leaned into Rafe even more. “Oh, that. That’s because he doesn’t even know you’re here yet” You downed your drink, feeling far too sober for all this.
“Okay Y/N, fuck this, let’s have some fun” Kelce grapped your arm and dragged you over towards the beer pong table. This dragging resulted you to bump into Logan. “Oh hi Y/N, long time no see” he smiled looking you up and down, “College looks good on you”.
Logan was the guy you would occasionally hook up with at parties, to forget about a certain someone. He looked good, you weren’t gonna lie. Still got the wavy brown hair and puppy eye look to him. You remembered him taller.
You laughed, “Great seeing you here too”. Kelce rolled his eyes and muttered something about you and Rafe being pathetic while leaving you with Logan.
“I actually…” you vaguely gestured to the beer pong area. “Perfect, I was looking of a pong partner” he said. Fuck it, you thought thinking of the interaction between Allison and Rafe.
Before he lead you the way, he brought your hand up to his lips and gave it a kiss, making you slap him on the chest playfully. You literally felt like you time traveled to your senior year of high school.
What you didn’t see was that Rafe saw the whole thing happening. Annoyance all over his face he pulled the girl next to him closer.
When he sees you and Logan setting up the game he wastes no time in dragging Allison over to the table.
“Looking for some opponents, Y/N?” The familiar voice made your heart skip a beat. You look up to lock eyes with the one and only Rafe Cameron. This crush was far from over.
“Always, it's not like you can beat us anyways” you cocked your head to the side. “Shouldn’t be too hard this time with your poor choice of a partner” He said, immediately blushing.
You rolled your eyes and tried to hide a smile. “I think he makes a great partner actually”. Now it was Rafe’s turn to roll his eyes.
Rafe and Allison were in the lead.
“Y/N, your top is distracting me from the cups” Rafe argued while adjusting his hat. “Good.” you said while throwing the ping pong ball with shaky hands and therefor missing the cup.
“Elbow!! Shut up Rafe, that was literally over the line” You walked over, a wave of your perfume hitting him, and adjusted his arm noticing the way he tensed his jaw and his cheeks turned pink. Your cold hands against his burning skin. “Keep it like this” You said looking up at him. He just stared at you.
The game went on like that for a while.
“Fuck off, how are you so good at this” you said while giving yet another cup to Logan. “Oh Y/N, I’m good at many things you don’t know about yet”. The alcohol was definitely getting to the both of you but still, neither of you broke the tension.
During all this Allison and Logan shared knowing looks, they've known since forever what they got involved in.
In the end, against all odds, you and Logan won. You cheered and pulled him in a tight hug, him giving you a peck on the cheek. "Congrats Y/N" Rafe said downing the last cup of beer and walking away.
Now that the game was over and you felt some alcohol coursing through your veins you told Logan you were gonna check on Flossie inside.
Making your way through the crowded hallway to the kitchen, pushing the occasional person out of the way. You knew your friends would be hanging out in there. You saw Rafe and Kelce in a somewhat heated discussion. Right next to them Topper and Flossie are making some kind of new cocktail recipe.
"So I told you just fucking ask Y/-, Kelce paused mid sentence, "Y/N, hey we were just wondering where you were." You greeted them, feeling a bit of awkward tension hanging in the air. Rafe's lips parted as if he was going to say something but before he got the chance Flossie suddenly announced "Let's do shots" while Logan, who appeared next to her, held a bottle of vodka. Kelce and Logan immediately taking theirs, Topper handed you two shots, one to give to Rafe. Flossie and Topper took the shot while linking their arms together. That inspired you.
You looked at Rafe, back to them and to Rafe again raising your eyebrows. Your fingers brushing against each other when you handed him the shot. He saw what Flossie and Topper did, raised his eyebrows while smirking and you intertwined your arms, stepping closer to each other. His cologne being the only thing you could smell. Looking at his blue eyes one last time before taking the shot. When detangling your arms, Rafes lips parted again but before he could say something Allison showed up out of no where dragging him to the dance floor, him leaving you nothing but an apologetic look.
Disappointment filling your body, you heard a "Looking for me?". Logan smiled hugging you from behind. It's like he knew. You took his hand this time and pulled him to the dancefloor.
-
Call your girlfriend by Robyn was playing. Moving in sync to the beat of the music, Logan and you got closer and closer until there was barely any space left. Trying to forget how badly you wanted him to be Rafe. Inches away from making out. In the corner of your eye you saw Rafe dancing closely with Allison, stealing glances at you. Logan's hands around your waist, your nose touching his. Trying to forget Rafe's blushed cheeks. The beat dropped, your hands in Logans neck, his lips on yours. Eyes closed. Trying to forget the tension felt during beer pong. Hands roaming your body, you pulling his hair. Trying to ignore Rafe's eyes burning in your back.
You couldn't ignore it.
With nothing but alcohol induced confidence running through your veins, you opened your eyes, looking straight at Rafe. His jaw slacked, forgetting all about the kiss with Allison. It felt like time slowed down. You swear you saw his cheeks burn crimson. She tried to continue the kiss, but he has completely lost focus. Your heart is beating out of your chest. Rafe closed his eyes and mouthed fuck.
Fuck indeed. You had no idea what possessed you to do that or what to do now. You kept dancing with Logan, Rafe kept dancing with Allison. Maybe if you both acted like nothing happened, nothing happened.
-
The party was coming to an end, most people had left at this point. You had said goodbye to Kelce, Flossie went home with Topper, which was truly unexpected. The sun was rising but you couldn't leave yet. Not without even having a proper conversation with him.
The sound of empty beer cans and movement of glass bottles was coming out of the kitchen. Footsteps on the sticky floor. You moved closer to the sound. Rafe was stood in the kitchen cleaning up, his back to you. The first sun light coming through the window. It was different to see him in the early summer sun after the dimly lit party. You observed for a bit. He was wearing a yellow coloured Ralph Lauren polo you recognised from his instagram. The hat he had been wearing earlier discarded on the kitchen counter. His usually gelled back hair was exchanged for a messier version.
"Hey Rafe" you startled him. "Jesus, can you move any quieter?". You walked towards him and emptied a few cans of opened beer in to the sink. "Why are you still here, it's literally 5 in the morning?" he asked confusion written on his face. “Couldn’t leave without talking to my favorite beer pong opponent.” You said, looking down. Rafe laughed, “Still your favourite? Didn't meet a better one in college?” You looked up at him. Close enough to see the faint freckles on the bridge of his nose. His hair golden as the pale morning sun hit him from behind. The cool blue eyes in stark contrast with his ever rosy cheeks. “Still my favourite.” You smiled. He looked down at you, tensed jaw, hand running through his hair in an pathetic attempt to put the loose strands back in place. “Good, I was getting worried I had to find a new favourite.” He dropped the empty can of beer in the sink, the sound harsh against the quiet room. "I won't ever find a new favourite." He almost whispered. You stepped closer.
Once again time moved in slow motion. You leaning in, him stepping closer. Tension so thick you could feel it from miles away. You pulling him even closer by the belt loops on his pants. A faint gasp leaving Rafe's lips. Bodies touching. Him playing with your fingers. The smell of his cologne. The sunrise coloured the room golden. Nervous eyes, blushed cheeks. Him looking at your lips. "Are you sure?" barely a whisper left his mouth.
And the tension dropped. It was as if the two of you melted together.
Your lips touched his.
tagging some mutuals/blogs i love <3 @proactivetypeofperson @bigdrewenergy @stfukie @pogueslandia @lurkymurker @barrysjumpsuit @mentalpolaroids
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