#im a chronic dumbass

[mamawasatesttube]

kon is not really a leader (though he's also not an idiot actually and i will die on this hill) but he's such a good right hand man. very loyal. mom friend. powerhouse. this is Also why timkon are so spirk coded (but this time it's flipped) and in this essay i will

#the thing about kon that everyone gets wrong is that he's not stupid. he's a dumbass but he's not stupid #he doesn't always think things through and he has a chronic habit of always believing the best in people to the point of naivety sometimes #but he's so creative and resourceful. genuinely one of the most fun things in sb94 is how many different ways he turns situations around #wait. post canceled i just thought about the end of knockout arc and im no longer having fun im just SAD #anyway um. coughs. kon and his insane loyalty. always being a pillar of steadfast support to the person he's being insanely loyal to #which is generally tim but has also been cassie in canon #what a guy. mr. right hand man #still sad about knockout arc but im ignoring it now it's fine. #rimi talks #kon #timkon

[heyitsmemel]

hi hello gals and gays. Here is a rare wav from me struggling with the flu. The virus has mainly been in my chest but my entire body is so wrecked I was able to induce super easily. No talking bc I’m literally unable to 😭 Do not listen if you can't stand harsh coughing because it gets a bit rough. If it sounds a bit weird the first half of the recording is from yesterday and the second half is from today, bc the coughing is so much worse in the second half lmao. Ok that's it thankkk you for feeding me so good lately tumblr love u all <3

also personal rant about ableism and intentional contagion in the comments :///

#ok like I haven't been this sick in literal years and cuz im disabled i'm super mindful of spreading germs to others. #and i've had some family staying with me so I was like great leave me here to rot in my cave guys #my partner has been rlly attentive and is like i don't care about germs tehe so yesterday he comes into my room #and gives me a bunch of kisses on my head then swoops in and kisses me ON THE MOUTH #like im sorry i've been lying in a pool of feverish sweat for days and can hardly breathe what part of that makes someone go ooo gimme? #like ya hes just trying to love me but i put so much effort into being clean and now i will feel really guilty when he gets sick #sorry not sorry intentional contagion is not cute or sexy at all its just irresponsible #like i would love to live the life where my body works so well that I don't give a second thought to KISSING someone with the flu #i just feel like able bodied people never think about what its like living with a disability or a chronic illness #or have the slightest inclination of how privileged they are #my partner isn't even a fetishit he is just a dumbass #but ya i just wish he and the general population would think more :/ #snzblr #snz #illness kink #snzfucker #snz wav #snzzzzz #snz blog #anyway thats all do what u want with my horn post

[maladaptive-daydreaming-aphant]

me, yesterday: i'll download some yt videos ahead of time for this long road trip so i don't get bored when we lose reception! and i'll bring my steam deck with lots of games too!!

me, 15 minutes into the road trip after something in the first video reminded me of my favorite para: i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydream i need to daydr

#im so fuckin stupid LOL #my parents have taken me on this same exact 8-hour roadtrip sooo many times over the years and i end up daydreaming every time #even before i became a chronic madd-er i was daydreaming in the backseat on these highways #this is the first time ive been on this trip since learning about madd (visiting grandparents. last time was before the pandemic) #idk why my dumbass thought this time would be any different lmao #madd #madd things #rivulette's thoughts #maladaptive daydreaming #maladapting daydreaming disorder #daydreaming

[manyothermusingsofmine]

Shadowheart in other people's playthroughs apparently: Every day I have to cast lesser restoration!!

Shadowheart in my playthroughs: what do you mean she's out there tackling everything while Bloodless? WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S WINNING?!

#bg3 #shadowheart #Bloodless literally doesnt bother me enough to stick lesser restoration on anyone its only a minus one #it rarely actually makes me fail on anything #also I dont mean this in a bragging way I mean this in a -nothing will prepare you for the sheer luck of a chronic dumbass- kinda way #im just lucky the dice usually aren't that dismayed with me

[birdclowns]

who knew that good compression socks to hold your stupid legs with terrible genes in place. would make you not feel pain when you walk or stand. what a wild concept

#“surely it wont help” im a fucking dumbass #ill still be in pain im sure. but not anything like i have been!!!! #use things that are designed to help chronic pain<3 #bc theyre so needed #i talk

[th3d0nutl0rd]

GUYS MY NEW PIERCING IS SO BADLY INFECTED IDK WHAT TO DO WITH IT ITS MY FAV ONE BUT ITS LIKE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF MY FACE AND EVERYONE WILL KNOW AAAAAAAAA also what's worse is it's absolutely my fault (I had a dream that resulted in me punching myself right in it and also waking myself up in the process)

#listen #i had a dream that a spider was crawling on my new piercing #so i slapped it away in my dream #and punched myself in the face in real life #and it woke me up #and now my piercing is all gross and infected #body piercing #bridge piercing #OH AND ALSO #I'd like to clarify that i dont give a shit about the pain. #i can put up with that I've had chronic illness for forever #ITS THE BRUISING IM WORRIED ABOUT #BECAUSE QUITE FITTINGLY I LOOK LIKE IVE BEEN PUNCHED IN THE FACE #AND I HAVE #BUT IT WAS BY MYSELF #THE BRIDGE OF MY NOSE IS LITERALLY YELLOW #and the piercing is all inflamed #and its gonna go crusty asf #i wish i had long hair to just cover it until it heals #BUT INSTEAD EVERYONE HAS TO KNOW AND SEE I'M A DUMBASS #AND I PUNCHED MYSELF IN THE GODDAMN FACE

[thetardisisnotourdivision]

Honestly sometimes I can't even tell what's causing the "symptoms" I experience anymore. Forgetting what I'm doing in the middle of something! Is it brain fog? A trauma response? Am I just a dumbass? We'll never know!

#chronically ill #ptsd #im a dumbass

[frengers]

i suck bad at self-evaluations:

no concept of timelines

chronically convinced i am doing everything wrong

#but wait... is thinking i suck bad at self-evals also related to 'chronically convinced im doing everything wrong' #this is not even taking that long im just a dumbass #.txt

[angrysheeptime]

Turns out if you take care of yourself shit becomes more bearable!

#throwing shade at myself #my dumbass going #huh why do i feel so bad #meanwhile ive been doing all the thingsim not supposed to be #disabled #chronic pain #fibromyalgia #eczema #allergies #fucking hell everything flared up #i spend one day devoted to keeping my ass in bed #taking all my meds #doing all my treatments #and suddenly im half way to better

[nyxi-pixie]

the most important thing abt noah coming out is that the people going 'hehe how does our fav strAIGHT frat boy play that fucking gayass so well??😱😱' had to stfu😁👍

#its annoying when people do it abt anyone tbh #that was so fucking irritating lmfaoooo #me omw to remind the masses of hets and chronically online 12yr old queers whove never met a gay person irl that we're not a monolith🤩 #it doesnt escape my notice that yall say it more violently the second anyone so much as iMPLIES that they mighy not be straight #'speculating is bad' yes! but shockingly! yelling to the moon + back that them being not straight is impossible is not the best alternative #and perpetuates every dumbass stereotype #im so tired #also if you say hey maybe stop insisting theyre str8 for no reason every 5 seconds for a cheap joke abt the queer character they play #then everyone immediately is frothing at the mouth holding a chainsaw to ur throat #def not indirecting anyone w this😟 #i dont even remember who it was but someone was always putting those stupid noah straightest man in the world jokes on my dash #n i just used to stare at them like holy shit u guys are gonna be shocked when u encounter gay ppl outside of the internet. #my tags ran away from me again #but i hope u guys Hear Me on this shit bc this happens w every celebrity ever #and then ppl turn around and pretend the problem was ppl thinking they might be queer #instead of ppl refusing to believe theyre anything other than straight #anyway. #am a little late to posting abt him i know😔 have been so ia here recently but i saw it when it happened and am vv proud of him #<33 just to get a little of track at the end here #but yeah hes lovely and i wish people who were insisting he was straight would understand him as an examole that gay ppl arent all the same #but they wont cos they immediately turn to going 'omgggg our fav slayqueen i always knew hehehehe he just looks so fruitsalad' #heed my warnings i am a conduit of rage and violence and one day im going to use it on those ppl #oh fuck this was so many tags i am an unrestrained tag menace #a tennis if you will #aha like the game #anyway #byler #(<- it isnt but this is where i was seeing 'Straight Frat Boy Noah could never be gay' posts so.) #(not most of you tho<333 just a few) #right im going back to reading this 700k word fic from another fandom when will i return to tumblr?? who knows. not me

[writer-i-hardly-know-er]

Gotta say dealing with chronic fatigue along with a mild sunburn and a cold right now was like almost fine, I've been fighting hard today to not be completely delirious, but now of course it is dark out and the dumbass Americans need to bomb the neighborhood and give me a panic attack too. Happy 4th eve, not looking forward to tomorrow

#4th of july #panic attack #tw ptsd #chronic illness #sickposting #im also a dumbass american

[revelmaven]

friends i may be a dumbass, and in fact i put this question to my group chat with that exact sentence, but im putting it here in case anyone else is a little more like me than we ought to admit

I THINK I STUMBLED UPON THE INTENDED FUNCTION OF A MOBILITY AID

this is where everyone can call me a dumbass, but here goes

so, to set the scene: i went to a semi-local community festival today with a group of friends - we used to go every month, and today the weather was finally nice enough to return, so we were jazzed.

problem with this festival is it's held in a massive outdoor community space whose terrain is almost entirely uneven gravel, tree roots, and sudden inclines on weird angles, and is accessed by the world's most calf-destroying hill. also it's pretty much an entire day of walking around.

so i brought my cane!!

i have a cane. i barely use it. it's about hip-height, hand-painted Chinese oak, with a pistol grip in the shape of a squirrel/fox/red panda/????? it's not the world's most high tech cane but it's sturdy and it's never steered me wrong. i picked it up when i shot my pelvis out, and ive used it maybe four times since, usually only on really bad days*.

today was not a bad day; today was actually a very good day! but i've had some very bad pain days recently, and i thought id bring it just in case.

(*i ought to mention my ability to judge bad days is severely lacking, and usually it's only after multiple painful days in a row that i consent to even keeping the cane in my car in case i decide Later i want it - i may have some internalised things to worry about)

but since i had it, i used it. what i would typically do at this festival is tromp around barefoot and have a merry old time, and most likely after five hours my legs would bitch at me and id put my brace on to get through work (night shift), and see if i still hurt in the morning. what i did Today was start off barefoot until i found a super bitchin' pair of goth platform sandals with ankle straps and arch support, whack those on, and bring my cane from the start. i leaned on it intermittently throughout the day, switched arms when i needed to (because i don't have a Good and Bad knee; the good one is whichever's stopped hurting right then), and plodded around for five hours, drove an hour in a manual to drop everyone home, and completed three hours of waitressing solo with no brace, and it was only when i was finishing up and about to go home that my usual trick knee started to do it's I'm Going To Start Hurting Soon little pressure ache thingy.

and it JUST occurred to me. what the POINT of a mobility aid might be.

because ive lived and operated under the assumption that a mobility aid is something you use if you have no choice and literally cannot function without it. i figured if i probably Could still walk, albeit running the risk of pain, without my cane, i didn't need the cane.

my experiment today leads me to believe the Actual function of a mobility aid is to help extend the amount of time i can function for without pain. the point is that by the time i need the cane i'll already have it, and the point of needing it (or needing to stop for the day) will be far later than it would without. as i put it to my friends: is the idea in fact that you use them to extend the amount of time you Don't Super Need Them so you almost never Can't Function Without Them?

AM I DUMB??

#anyway i now have some dope goth sandals and a cane for summer #bc im takin that shit everywhere now #respect for chronic girlies #life upd8 #zero speaks #dumbass tag

[slimerancher-2]

no wonder my wanderer sucks, he has every illness (every illness being underleveled artifacts, underleveled talents, and forgetting to use said artifact's set bonus)

#i cant believe i forgot to use charged attacks thats like the whole set bonus #forgetting why im killing enemies like dumbass!! im getting talent level up materials #no wonder gales of reverie does so little it only scales off of atk #his atk is also chronically low #also crit rate is a bit low but 40ish is still fine #genshin impact #genshin wanderer

[wishful-seeker]

Hello I am your local crippled punk that can't seem to stop arguing with ableists because making them speechless with regret is just too fucking funny.

#yes im actually disabled dumbass #yes i call my meds power ups #get mad #cripple punk #disability #disabled #chronic pain #chronic illness #chronically ill

[milkibana]

YouTube taking Google searches and giving recommendations based on it has given me the worst possible recommendations. It also confused me for a bit cause I didn't know that that's what YouTube was doing (I don't read site updates ever).

So if your recommendation is more garbage than usual that's why.

#but if you already knew that keep in mind im a chronic dumbass #youtube #google

[arodrwho]

.

although.... have we considered that i dont have a problem actually and i just keep getting shoulder impingement bc i haven't found a good enough desk/chair setup for work? and that's all it is actually? it would explain why the pain (when it's my shoulder and Bad) feels like pinching/like something's getting caught when i reach the end of my range of motion. and why the pain isn't symmetrical. and why it only happens sometimes

not really why it's on kind of a schedule but the schedule isn't Exact anyways

mmn. might not explain the time my shoulder crunched real bad, but i dunno maybe i tore smth? i wouldnt think that would crunch a 2nd time and get better though

and this also wouldnt explain why it happened to my fingers or my elbow or my knee

but maybe it all comes down to overuse? i did a lot of pushups a couple days before my elbow fucked off on me after all, and i'd stretched my fingers pretty hard the day before the last time my finger was Bad

but i have also done these things other times with no consequences whatsoever... maybe it's overuse + the specific timing around my period bc the associated inflammation?

fuck dude i dunno like. i dont want to go to this rheumatologist and open my stupid mouth and say "hey yeah about once a month i get one (1) stupid joint for between like 24 hours & a week whats that about" and they're like. well u seem fine i think u have shoulder impingement. do more stretches about it

like i think i'll just die honestly

#idk idk like they gave me a list of drs to choose from and i keep reading their specialties and it's all like #RA and lupus and shit and i dont have either of those #i would be in way more pain way more often and would also have like fatigue and other symptoms and stuff #and i DON'T so it's like. well. this is a dr for serious issues that i Don't have actually really #and maybe if i just take the fish oil and the vitamins this really will go away #and then i'll look like a dumbass #like. i clearly don't actually have a chronic illness im fine? #so whats even the point? they do tests MAYBE and they come back clear bc of course theyre going to come back clear #and then i go home feeling stupid