#im just tired of homework and i cant even focus properly | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

saltyartificialintelligence · 6 months

Text

Vent

fuck fuck fuck fuck i fucking hate feeling like this oh my god

i have so much homework due next monday because we're on "break" but were not even on break as uni exam year students we still go to school regularly but everyone used it all as an excuse to give us hundreds of papers of homework like we have all the time in the world im going to fucking cry we still go to school and i know im not gonna be able to finish it but i cant even bring myself to do it bc im sof ucking exhausted all the time lately and i dont even know why my life went downhill so quickly and i feel like eveything is out of order now and i dont even know how to fix it why did things end up like this i dont know what to do i cant cry to my parents because they never take me seriously i cant cry to my sister because shes just going to make fun of me i dont want to cry to my friends because they have their own lives to worry about and i cant just burden them with mine like this,,

i constantly feel like an alien trying to communicate with my classmates at school,, since my friends all left to different schoolslast year and im stuck all alone and im trying to make new friends but i constantly feel like an outsider,,, i feel like thyere all what a person is supposed to be but im deranged,,, they all have their lives in order and im typing away on this hellsite because im so overwhelmed i want to cry,,,

my mock exam results were garbage and im not even able to do my math homework its the one thing i thought i was good at and now i cant even manage that

I dont have time to draw i dont have time to play games i need to study but im so exhausted that i cant focus at all and im never going to make it to uni at this rate and everything keeps piling on and on and now im stuck and the adhd is only making things worse for me

My teeth constantly hurt my back is always stiff and im in incredible pain and my hair keeps getting oily and my exams always go like shit these days but i dont know if i have enough time to get everything in order i

My psychiatrist is too expensive now and i can only go to her once every 2 months but im nort getting any help at all and she refuses to prescribe me anything bc im not 20 yet but i just want to stop feeling like this and start being functional again i dont care if it messes up my hormones or if i cant give birth or if my period cycle gets messed uo or something i dont care just i just want to feel better again i want everything to stop so that i can catch a break bur it all keeps going faster and im lost

bc of the stuoid fucking wheather the lights keep going out and none of the plugs work properly and so my phone is never charged and Its been like this for days and my dad went on a trio and my mom doesn't want to call an electric and im so fucking annoyed all the time now

My dad never stops making marks about how my grades arent enough and my mom keeos commenting on my weight and my appearance and im so sick and tired of everything i want to fall asleep for 6 years

i have to organise things in my server but i keep putting it off and uts been like that for days and im so overwhelmed at the thought of the task that i cant even start now so im stuck in place being completely unproductive i want this to end i want to study i want to organise the server i want to have a stable life again but things keep going wrong and now im sitting in the kitchen crying and typing bc its like screaming into a void on tumblr

Im so sick and tired of living like this jm exhausted i want the selfcest shipper to leave me alone already i physically need her to leave me the hell alone but she keeps blocking me and unblocking me and following me and unfollowing me and i spend all my time worrying whether or not i did something wrong or upset her and yet she keeps asking to join the aerver and then leaving the server but ppl like her for some reason but shes been nothing but rude to me and keeps acting entitled and i want to be done with her bullshit already

i feel like im slowly losing my mind but bc i act normal irl noone ever realises it but my bucket always fills and i end up lashing out at the weomg time constantly and getting yelled at for it but its fine for everyone to treat me like garbage right?? Its fine for my classmates and own parents to never listen to me and always interrupt me when im trying to talk i guess i should just keep quiet but i have emotions too and i experience them normally amd i should be allowed to express them instead of being told to shut up or getting ignored

I want to sleep for a long time

#tw vent #I'm sorry

2 notes · View notes