#kim little

[katiemcabeswife]

all of my girls = slaying 💅🏼

side bit kimmy little’s model face fucking eats every time 🫡

#arsenal fc #woso community #woso #arsenal wfc #katie mccabe #kim little #alessia russo

[maxsimagination]

would you write more for kim little please? maybe her dating someone younger on the team and the rest of the girls find out? <3

𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙮 - 𝙠.𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚

warnings: none, just an age gap

-------

“kimmyyyy, no i wanna sleep in. pleaseeee.”

i groaned as kim pulled the curtains to our shared apartment. i wanted to enjoy the last moments with her until we had to go to training and pretend we weren’t dating.

it wasn’t because we didn’t think they’d accept us, it was more because kim was 33 and i was only 22.

the team might not think that was bad, but if they knew then it was only a matter of time before the media knew, and it would blow up indefinitely once they knew. we just weren’t willing to risk it right now.

i ended up being dragged out of bed by kim, the scot managing to haul me to the bathroom. i was half asleep but went through my morning routine like clockwork.

we rocked up at the training fields within the next hour, but kim walked in first. we drove there in the same car but walked in separately so people didn’t suspect anything.

“yn!”

“leah!”

i greeted the blonde when i walked in, levelling her excitement with my own. she jumped onto me in a hug, before slipping back onto the floor.

we walked into the dining hall where the rest of the team and staff were, picking up our designated plates and electing to sit at katie’s table. which also happened to have kim at it.

i, obviously, chose to sit next to kim but thankfully no one picked up on that.

we were allocated an hour to eat breakfast before everyone had to actually start working for the day. all the players filed out to the changing rooms where we changed into our boots, and i slipped my hoodie off while i had the chance.

i caught kim’s gaze as i jogged out to meet leah, throwing a cheeky grin at her expression.

leah was up with katie and cait, talking about god knows what. i joined in, but then jonas cut everyone’s conversations short with his yell for attention.

“girls! let’s get started please. we’re doing a jogging warmup lap, then weights.

find a partner once you’ve finished the lap, use each other for spotting. we don’t need any injuries.”

there was collective murmurs of agreement, and we started jogging around the field. i naturally found myself jogging next to kim, as if a magnet pulled us together.

“gym partners?”

i questioned, she nodded.

we made our way to the weights section of the gym arsenal had.

“we are so doing legs first.”

i all but dragged kim over to the leg press to kickstart our session. kim did not want to do legs, she was into training arms, which was very visible from the bicep muscles that she sported.

one of the many things i drooled over.

i had shoved at least 250lbs onto the leg press machine and watched as kim’s eyes bulge at the amount of plates.

“you’re telling me you can safely lift that?”

“nope. but i’m gonna.”

i ended up doing two reps of fifteen, before upping the weight to 300lbs. kim may have had an aneurysm at the amount of weight i was pushing, and making it look like it was nothing. but she still stood behind me, watching, spotting, and dancing her fingertips over my shoulder blades.

it gave me tingles, and was slightly ticklish. what we didn’t know was that leah was looking from across the room, and she knew that something was up.

when the gym session was over and we started actual drills, leah was quick to pin me as her partner for anything. i thought it was weird but didn’t question it.

when we had a break leah took my hand and walked past kim, beckoning her to follow us. leah walked us away from the groups of girls, so we were out of earshot.

“there’s something going on between you two. spill.”

both of us were quick to sputter out some form of excuse.

“no, what do you mean.”

“don’t know what you’re talking about, lee.”

leah gave us both one of her stares.

“cut the crap. i see the way you look at each other, the little touches. not to mention you both come into practice witching minutes of each other, every morning.”

i exchanged a look with kim, there was no point in hiding this from leah. she was like the fbi, she knew everything.

“okay. we’re dating. we have been for a year.”

something settled in leah’s expression, now she knew what was going on.

“i knew it.

kimmy, going for the young ones are we?”

leah poked at kim’s side, grinning at the skipper. there was an eleven year gap between us, hence why we had kept it secret for a while.

“shut it, lee. do we need to tell the whole team?”

“it would make things easier. for you that is. but only if you want.”

i look over at kim. she looks over at me. i shrug, i never had a problem with telling everyone, kim was the logic one who knew the ins and outs of the media.

“fuck it why not. they’ll figure out eventually.”

“we don’t have to say anything, we can just walk out there and start acting like a couple. see how long it takes them.”

i throw out the idea with a grin. why not have a little fun with it.

we end up agreeing on my idea. training still had a couple of hours left and jonas gave us a few more drills to do, so me and kim forgot all about keeping the secret and just had fun training with each other for once.

surprisingly, none of the girls, not even the staff, said anything. not even kyra or alessia, of all people.

you’d think that the two most gossipy youngsters on the team would say something. but by the end of training, no one was any wiser. so leah told them all.

kyra let out a very loud, ‘oh my god!’ which caught the attention of alessia, who told lotte, so on and so on. soon the whole team knew and it was like a weight was lifted off our shoulders.

“kimmy, i didn’t know you were into the young ones.”

katie’s irish accent was unmistakable as she caught up with us to poke fun at the skipper. cait walked alongside me, she didn’t tease neither me nor kim, simply said she was happy for us.

you could tell she was true with her words, she was in a very similar situation, when her and katie first got together.

“a proper cougar then, our skipper.”

lotte and alessia laughed as they walked past.

it was funny, all the jokes they threw around, but most of all i was happy that they accepted us.

#woso #woso x reader #woso community #kim little #kim little x reader #kim little imagine

[midnight-ramblingswfc]

Poor Kim will never have a second of peace

#arsenal wfc #arsenal women #kim little #katie mccabe

[carolineshairtie]

Leah, angrily: ARE YOU-

Alessia: Fucking.

Leah: -KIDDING ME?! YOU-

Alessia: Fucking.

Leah: IDIOT-

Beth: *disturbed after getting screamed at* ... what was that?

Alessia: Kim banned Leah from saying fuck so I thought I'd help her out.

#woso #woso community #woso imagine #woso soccer #woso fanfics #woso incorrect #woso incorrect quotes #awfc #arsenal #leah williamson #alessia russo #beth mead #kim little

[desperate-gay]

how bout a heated confession between r and kim little? i really want some kimmy fics 😔😭 my girl needs more love and attention 😔🙏🏻❤

Unexpected Confession

Kim Little x fem!reader

“You, my dear, are one of a kind!” Leah exclaims, grasping onto your shoulders as everyone cheers you on. You smile sheepishly while collecting all of the compliments with a light blush.

Arsenal had just won 4-2 against Chelsea with you scoring two goals back to back at the end of the second half. The whole team basically jumped on you when the final whistle blew, congratulating you while spewing how amazing you were the full ninety minutes.

“Our little miss innocent also showed some of her rough side with that tackle.”

“Katie, stay away from her, we can’t handle you rubbing your card reputation on our goal scorer.” Steph says, shielding you from the Irish woman by wrapping her arms around your front so her taller form blocks your view.

“Well thank you all for the many flattery remarks, but it wasn’t-”

“Y/l/n, a talk?” Kim interrupts, nodding her head toward the empty office.

The team all stand in silence, wondering why their player of the match is getting called away by the captain.

You look at her with a confused look when she announces your last name. The both of you are extremely close and friends outside of games, so when she announces your last name, you’re taken aback.

You quickly follow Kim into the room before she shuts the door with a gentle click and closes the blinds so none of the team can snoop around.

“I told Jonas to bench you for the upcoming game against Manchester.” The midfielder states with a stoic expression and her arms crossed.

“What? Why?”

“That tackle against Reiten was dangerous. Someone could have easily gotten hurt and you need to deal with the consequences.” She explains while avoiding your gaze, not being able to keep her captain facade up if she even takes a peek at your doe eyes.

“That’s so unfair! Russo made a late tackle but she’s not getting benched!” You exclaim, getting irritated at the sudden hostility directed at you.

“Your tackle was dangerous and could’ve cost you an injury. My decision is final.” Kim’s tone warns you it’s the end of the discussion, but you’re too pissed off to give her the satisfaction of an easy win.

As she goes to walk away, you quickly run in front of the door, blocking the older girl from exiting the room. Her eyebrow raises in a silent warning matching the unimpressed look on her face.

“No. You’re not just going to walk out of here without giving me a reason as to why I’m being benched.”

“I’ve already told you-“

“Don’t give me that bullshit excuse that it’s because of my tackle. Yes, it was a little late and that’s my fault but that is no reason not to let me play next week. So tell me the real reason why. Now.”

Kim now raises her eyebrows in surprise at your sudden demanding front. You’re not even sure where it came from because the way the captain is looking at you, you wish you could melt into the floor and never come back, but you simply just gulp and stand up straighter to keep strong.

“Do you really want to be talking to your captain like that?” She questions, cocking her head to the side while slowly walking closer to you, causing you to feel smaller and smaller at the girl's sharp gaze.

“I want the truth.” You say shakily, wiping your clammy hands up and down your tracksuit.

“I gave you the truth, but you can’t deal with it.”

“Why are you lying? Just tell me!” The rise in your voice shocks the other girl, you’re usually always the quiet, calm, and sweet person of the team but not when someone is continually being untruthful towards you.

“You could have gotten injured.” Kim admits halfheartedly, showing you she is still hiding something.

“I am fine. You have no right to take me off the team just because of something that could have happened. If you don’t tell me the real reason now, I am walking out of here and I don’t want you talking to me unless it is an explanation or an apology.”

After a minute or two of silence, you give up. With a scoff and a roll of your eyes, you begin to turn the door handle only to be stopped by an unexpected confession.

“It’s because I love you!”

Your body stays facing the door as you process what the Scottish woman has just said. You run through all the little dates the two of you had together, remembering how you were hoping it would be much more than just friendly, but also thinking that the girl just wasn’t into you like that.

“I should have never said that, it was quite inappropriate. You may leave now.” Kim sighs with one hand on her head and the other waving you off. Slowly, you begin to approach her pacing form.

“Kim.”

“You don’t have to stay. You’re dismissed.”

“Kimmy.”

“Seriously, go home. It was a mistake and I didn’t mean it.”

“I love you too.” You whisper, locking eyes with her when her head snaps up.

“You love me?” She asks in disbelief, making you smile at how quickly the older girl turns quiet.

You take a few steps forward so you’re now face to face with her. You hesitantly wrap your arms around her as your thumb smooths out the tension between her eyes.

“I do. And I’m hoping that your confession was real because if it isn’t, you will see a hole shaped me through that wall.” You joke, causing the both of you to giggle softly, breaking a little of the tension. The taller girl’s hands find a comfortable place on your hips while she continues to look at you with a smile.

“It was real. I have been in love with you for a while now and I wasn’t sure how to tell you. I guess being a jerk wasn’t the best way.” You laugh with a small shake of your head.

“No, it wasn’t, but you can make it up to me.” Your head tilts, looking at her with a bright smile. Once she starts to lean in, you do too, meeting her halfway just before she stops.

“May I?”

“You may.”

With the whisper of confirmation, Kim softly connects her lips to yours in a gentle kiss, showing you how much it means and what it means. Only ten seconds in, she goes to pull away, but you wrap your hands behind her neck and pull her back in.

“Too short.” You mumble against her slightly chapped lips, leaving her chuckling at your eagerness and pushing you closer to her by the small of your back.

Before things got too heated, you both decided to pull away even if you didn’t want to. Although the kiss ended, each other’s arms stayed hugging around the other, enjoying the closeness.

“Will you let me take you on a date, let’s say this Saturday night?”

“I don’t know, I’m supposed to go out with this one girl who constantly takes me out on non-romantic dates because she’s sure we’re just friends.” You sigh in fake disappointment, letting the midfielder roll her eyes at your antics.

You gasp when she slams her lips into yours in a quick but fierce kiss before pulling back with a satisfied look.

“Let me make it romantic.” Kim offers with a charming smile, wooing you fully into saying yes even if you don’t need convincing.

“I’d be an idiot to say no.”

After a few minutes of little kisses, giggles, and talking, the both of you go to open the door only to be met with multiple falling bodies. A sheepish Kyra, Katie, and Beth look up from the floor with guilty smiles while the rest of the team turn back around and continue in their cubbies like they also weren’t eavesdropping.

“Everyone get dressed and leave unless you want to come in extra early tomorrow for some extra laps.” Kim announces with her captain expression, making everybody scramble.

The Scottish woman watches with a stone-cold expression before turning to look at you with a soft smile. She leans over and places a lingering kiss on your cheek.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Of course.”

#kim little x reader #kim little #steph catley #katie mccabe #kyra cooney cross #leah williamson #beth mead #arsenal wfc #arsenal #woso x reader #woso imagine #woso fic #woso

[sporadicbeans82]

The Rivalry || Arsenal Women x Reader

Summary: You've fallen back into old routine, but will your teammates notice in time to help you?-- based off of "Flora" by Hey, Nothing.

Warnings: Centered around drug abuse and addiction. If this is something which triggers you, please do not read this piece of fiction. Poor mental health, very brief mentions of self harm and disordered eating, a solid chunk of angst & comfort, please let me know if I have missed anything.

A/N: I was going to properly edit this but the wheel I rolled decided to just post it. I'm sad, so have this fic :)

Special thanks to @girlgenius1111, @greynatomy, & @ilovemeadema for all your help. I appreciate each of you!!!

Your life has always been a series of rivalries. You’d spent the majority of your formative years competing against your friends for starting positions on your youth football team, whilst competing for spots on your youth international team. 

In college, you played for the North Carolina Tar Heels and competed often against your school’s known rival, Duke. You threw your everything into each match you ever played for the college, but there always seemed to be extra charge on the table when it came through your sworn rivals. 

You signed for Arsenal just out of college, traveling abroad and leaving your family in the name of getting better and playing for a club that you’d secretly supported since childhood. Your rivalry then, of course, was Chelsea. 

See, all your life had always been a series of rivalries against other people and other teams. Never, in all your years, had you ever anticipated that your biggest rivalry would be against yourself. 

You think it had probably stemmed from the first time you’d suffered a serious injury on the pitch in college. You’d suffered a blow to your ankle. They’d given you little white pills to help stave off your pain, and you knew that your family had a history of drug addiction, so you tried to wean yourself off of them as soon as you could tolerate it. 

The remaining pills, however, had stayed in your dorm room drawer with all of your other medicines. It had taken you only a few months to open the pill bottle, driven by curiosity and overwhelming sadness. Your friends had been graduating, which meant that some of your favorite people were leaving you to move on with their adult lives. On top of that, you were struggling with a class and working through your grades which was causing you a lot of stress. The nail of the coffin had been that you’d found out that your mother was terminally ill, with cancer. 

You remembered the numbness and floatiness you’d felt when you’d taken the pills whilst recovering from surgery. You hadn’t had to feel the pain and had lived in your own little world, peacefully separated from the things which plagued you. It was exactly what you needed. 

You wondered if they’d do anything to numb you again. This time, however, you sought emotional numbness rather than pain relief.

You dipped your fingers into the orange bottle and took out a little white pill. You rolled the medication in between your fingers before slipping it between your lips, letting it rest on your tongue for only a moment. You hesitated, wondering if this was truly the right decision. However, the tears on your face stung against the skin of your cheeks and your heart throbbed to nearly an unbearable extent. You felt cornered, like you were left with no choice but to try to find a way to deal with what was happening, and so you dry swallowed the pill before you could think about it any further. 

You’d spent the afternoon on a cloud, staring at the wall of your dorm room while the television played your comfort show. You weren’t happy, but you weren’t sad. You were just what you’d desired to be, numb. Your mind was quiet, thoughts stilled, and you convinced yourself that this allowed you to help deal with and comprehend what was going on in your life. 

When the effects of the little white pill wore off, however, the pain came back… and so you took another. 

Once you went through the entire bottle, you were forced to find other ways to deal with the things which plagued your mind and body. You found other ways to control your pain, by restricting the amount of food you ate, by working out more, by drowning yourself in alcohol. None of it worked as you desired, but you had no other option. 

You managed to keep it a secret from your college teammates, as you only dipped into these harsh coping mechanisms every once in a while. Once, however, one of your teammates caught on to your struggles as you’d been losing a lot of weight. Alessia Russo, a senior, had confronted you and helped you to get some help. 

Alessia and the girls were there for you, of course, but then they’d graduated and you were left alone again. The loneliness was near-crippling, but with the help of your therapist and regular calls with Alessia, you were able to retain your sobriety throughout the rest of your college years. 

You’d moved to Arsenal out of college, and you’d been successful for the years that you’d been there. However, even as you continued to try harder and harder to better yourself, everything seemed to be failing and you couldn’t figure out why. 

Perhaps it was in the early morning hours of a new day. You should have been in your bed, buried deep in the comfort of your duvet. You should have been resting for the training session that you were supposed to be getting up for in just a few hours. 

Instead, here you were, sitting with some of your more recent “friends” in the alleyway between two abandoned buildings in North London. You were high as a kite, not entirely sure what you’d been given but more than happy to be on it. Sitting with your back slumped against a wall and your legs bent against your chest, you were able to ignore the pressures of being one of the younger Arsenal players. 

You were able to ignore the fact that you hadn’t scored a goal in nearly two months. You were able to put aside the fact that you’d cost Arsenal an important game just the week prior, by carelessly getting a red card in the 42nd minute. You’d gotten into a shoving match with another player, leaving your teammates with ten players against a dominant Tottenham team. 

You could stop thinking about how you’d been taken out of Arsenal’s starting XI, despite being a pivotal piece of the lineup since you’d signed for the team a couple of months back. You didn’t have to think about the number of people who were counting on you, and the mass amount of people who you were disappointing. You were trying your best, but your best was not and had never been enough. 

When you felt all high and floaty, you felt like you were separated from the person who suffered from thousands of online hate. The media enjoyed hyper analyzing your poor performance from the last few weeks, and many fans were quick to pick up on it. You’d become the laughing stock of women’s soccer, something which you were entirely too aware of whenever you opened your phone. You were bombarded with hate, despite having disabled comments on your social media accounts. 

Everywhere you went, you saw the image of you sliding against the ground after a failed attempt on goal. If not that image, then you saw the one where you were shoving the Tottenham player back against the torn up grass, an angry scowl upon your usually-serene features. Your Arsenal teammates were gathered around you, and fans were quick to make light of the fact that Katie McCard herself was holding you back from swinging a fist at the Spurs player. 

Everywhere you looked, your mistakes and poor performances were highlighted, and you wanted to ignore it all, to block it all away, just for a moment. Soon, you were back to your habits, and the six years that you’d spent on the recovery were down the drain as you went back to those same white pills.

They were relatively easy to get, actually, especially when you had been given a bottle of them recently after an injury. Each time you opened your phone and you were bombarded with hate, you resorted back to those same pills to numb the pain in your heart and soul, a crushing pain which returned in full force each time the effects of your pills wore off. 

You needed more, however, to numb the pain. It was getting harder to appear normal to your teammates, and you knew that they’d find out that something was wrong eventually. Yet, still, you couldn’t help it. 

Everything seemed useless to you. Your career was failing, your beloved family was across an entire ocean, and you’d given up something you’d spent years working towards– sobriety. Nothing mattered but numbing the pain that these failures caused you, so much so that you began to give up anything else in favor of those pills. 

Your teammates knew that something was the matter with you. It was something further than just simply playing badly, although they couldn’t quite figure out what it was. The signs were obvious, despite your ability to hide what was going on relatively well. 

You showed up late to training, took your dressing downs for your tardiness and performance with tired eyes and slumped shoulders. You were skinnier, something which was obvious when anyone caught a glimpse of you changing in the locker room before or after training or matches. You were pale, and abnormally short-tempered.

Alessia, especially, was beginning to realize what was going on. She recognized the signs from playing college with you, as did Lotte. The way your eyes darkened and reddened, your sudden exhaustion and disinterest in the sport and people that you’d once loved with every ounce of your body. You no longer went out with your teammates, nor did you joke around as you once had. Still, neither girl were completely sure that that was what was wrong, and they didn’t want to immediately assume the worst, not wanting to excuse the six years of sobriety that you’d managed to get under your belt. 

Even so, they couldn’t ignore the fact that each attempt of your teammates to talk to you was met with attitude and shouting. On the rare occasion, you’d leave your teammates in the dust, slamming a door behind yourself in order to punctuate the fact that you did not want to talk about what was going on with you. 

Your teammates were becoming desperate, beginning to corner you in places other than the pitch or the dressing room. Just four nights ago, Leah and Lia had shown up outside your house, knocking on your door and calling for you to open up. You’d managed to convince the two older girls that you weren’t home, as the lights were off and everything was locked up. 

The day after, Katie, Beth, and Viv had asked you to come out to lunch with them after training had finished up early. You’d brushed off their offer by saying that you had errands and house chores to complete. Something in their eyes told you that they didn’t believe your meager excuses, but you couldn’t find it within yourself to actually care. 

-----

"You don't believe in curfew, so you're staying out past 12

You know you really done it this time, you're too into yourself,"

-----

Kim had called your phone just the night prior, although her calls had gone unanswered by you. You’d declined each one with a scoff and a shake of your head. Finally, you’d set your phone to the side and had gone to shut it off for the night. However, you got a text from your friends’ group chat about going out that night, something which your troubled mind couldn’t deny. 

You appreciate your teammates, and love them like family. However, you couldn’t help but become quickly irritated by their attempts to get you to talk to them. 

Nothing was going on. You were fine, there was nothing to worry about. If you admitted that there was an issue, then you were afraid that what little control you felt you had on your life would slip from your quaking fingers. 

Before you left, you took a pill from your bottle, which was beginning to grow close to empty. You didn’t care at the moment, however, happy to ignore everything in favor of going out and pretending like you were someone that you weren’t. Worry free, happy. 

It was four in the morning by the time you’d stumbled back into your apartment. You were high, mostly, buzzing and numb and floaty and free.

Everything came crashing down as soon as you managed to open the door to your apartment. 

-----

"You've got pictures of your parents, they don't occupy your shelf

You don't know what you're doing, but you're puttin' them through hell,"

-----

It had taken a concerned phone call from your parents to Alessia just an hour before you left that had confirmed her worst fears. You’d shunned your parents, and had been ignoring their calls. 

You’d taken their pictures off of your walls, because when you felt like you were disappointing them and you couldn’t bear to look at them, even if they were just framed pictures. 

Your parents, after waiting a week, had called Alessia. They held the same fears that Alessia had had, afraid that you’d fallen back into your old patterns. Your parents had exchanged their notes with Alessia, and Alessia realized that she needed to step in, and fast. 

She’d called Kim, who in turn had called you. When she hadn’t gotten an answer, she and Leah, as well as Alessia and Lotte, had gone to your house together to see if you were there. 

You weren’t, and you continued to ignore their frantic calls. Alessia had half the mind to call the police, but Kim had decided that they would sit and wait in your apartment for you to come back before they jumped to conclusions or did anything drastic such as that. 

-----

"That's the card you wanna throw, you really, ought to know

There are things in life that you can change, some you can control

Like an addiction to nicotine or an addiction to coke

Some of which are in your realm, the others have you in a choke,"

-----

And so they waited. 

And waited. 

And waited some more.

Until, finally, they’d heard the click of your key scraping against your door. Alessia swore she could hear her heart pumping harshly in her own chest as they continued to wait.

The four women could hear the way you stumbled outside. You cursed, once and then twice, before you managed to get your key into the hole and properly turn it. 

Alessia would never forget the haunted look on your face as you stepped into your apartment to see them. It, of course, took you a moment to react as your actions and reactions were slowed with whatever you had taken. 

“To what… Do I owe the pleasure?” Your voice was slurred, and it was obvious that you were out of it. It took a moment for you to set down your things, and Kim was quick to help you set your things down before she was leading you over to the couch. The other girls sat around you, all in various states of mind. 

The truth was– there were things which fell under your control, and things that didn’t. Those things had once been clear cut, but now you felt like everything was crumbling beneath you no matter how hard you tried to hold onto them. 

You were sobering up, a glass of water in a shaking hand. As your mind cleared, dazed and arrogant and startled and frightened and so many other emotions which always accompanied the end of your high, you realized that your closely held secret had finally been figured out. 

You wanted to scream and shout, to lock your teammates out again. You wanted to push them away, physically and mentally, and never allow them to see you like this again. You felt naked beneath their gazes, unable to look any of them in the eyes as your head hung down on your chest. Your breaths were staggered, unsettled, conveying your nerves and disappointment in a way that your words could not. 

-----

"Hold (hold) on to me

Flora I (I) haven't felt you in weeks,"

-----

To everyone’s surprise, it was Alessia who spoke first.

“Hey Bug, are you…” Alessia hesitated, unable to figure out a way to phrase her words and soften them as not to startle you any further. Instead, she moved from her space on the floor and into the space next to you. You were cold, and so you allowed her to push her arm around you. “Are you using… again?”

Maybe it was Alessia’s words, or perhaps it was the feel of a soft touch against your skin. No matter, you seemed to shatter before their very eyes. Your shoulders seemed to crumple as you leaned further into Alessia and let out another sob, a tear sliding from the very corner of your left eye before slipping down your pale cheek and off your chin.

Then, the dam broke and you let out another sob, and another. Each one caused your shoulders to shake and your chest to shudder, your breaths uneven and shaky. You weren’t quite sure what to do, or what was going on, but Alessia’s hands around your shoulders pulled you further into her, comforting you with words uttered softly into your hair.

“It’ll be okay, Bug. We’ve got you, we’ve all got you. You’re okay.” Alessia murmured, like a mantra. Someone was moving behind you, and you weren’t sure who it was but they managed to wrap their arms around your other side as you were cushioned between their bodies. 

You felt safer than you had in months, and with that came the feeling that you could finally, finally let go and just feel and fall and trust that someone would catch you. 

And so you did. 

-----

"Lost all motivation when old Danny moved away

You thought that you can never live up to standards that he made,"

-----

They let you cry, comforting you with their words and touches which allowed you to know that they were there.

“Please, please don’t let go.” You’d nearly begged, and Alessia had tugged you in harder, allowing you to bury your face into her chest and sob. She held on tightly, as if you’d disappear if she let go– perhaps you would, with how pale and sickly you appeared in her arms. She tried to forget that, just for the moment, as she tried to comfort you.

You didn’t know it, but Alessia had been in pain just as you had. She’d noticed, but had been too afraid to voice her worries in case she’d been wrong. She knew that that was foolish, now, and she was cursing herself over and over again in her head for allowing you to get this bad again. 

She felt like, through her silence, she’d purchased a front row seat to your demise. Her grip tightened on your body impossibly further, so much so that she almost worried that she may be hurting you, but you simply clung to the other girl like she was your lifeline. 

Finally, when you’d cried more tears than you had thought that you could give, you sat back against the cushions of your couch. The material felt scratchy against your skin and you shivered, which Leah seemed to mistake for you being cold as she got up and grabbed a blanket from the chair she sat on. She came over, draping it across your shoulders and patting you softly before sitting back down again. 

Lotte was on your other side, one of her arms still around you and stroking at the skin of your shoulder. You knew what came next, and you were still mentally trying to wrap your head around the fact that your teammates knew.

The last time you’d struggled, you hadn’t even been aware that you’d had an addiction until someone had thrown the rock hard facts down in front of your face.

Now, however, you were more than aware of it– you knew you had a problem, but you felt powerless to stop it. You felt like, once you’d moved away from your parents, you’d lost the majority of the support you’d had with them.

Your awareness had somehow just made everything worse, the fact that you knew that you needed to stop but were unable to. You’d felt weak, useless, less than nothing in the face of something you’d long since beaten and returned to. You wanted, oh so badly, to stop using but you couldn’t– the numbness was too appetizing to your abused mind, and your strength and self control waned with every day that passed. 

Sure, your teammates stepped in and made you feel like you were a part of a larger family. Still, it wasn’t the same.

-----

"Well, guess what? You'll never live unless, you learn to be okay

The fact that time is fleeting and legs aren't long enough to chase,"

-----

You explained everything that night to your four attentive teammates. By the end of it, you’d thought that they would shun you.

In fact, you’d half expected Kim to make a call to Jonas and tell him that he should kick you off the team. 

You’d never expected all of them to embrace you together, like one big family group hug. Kim had told you that she would help you, that they would all be there for you. She’d explained that others who had come before you had struggled with mental health and addiction as well, and that they’d gotten the help that they’d needed through the Arsenal team and therapists. 

You’d felt weak, and it was Leah who told you that you weren’t. She’d pressed a kiss against your forehead before explaining that they’d all struggled, and that they’d all needed help. 

“The bravest people are the ones who seek help when they need it,” Leah had said, arms on your shoulders as her blue eyes bore into your own. “I needed help with my ACL, did that make me weak? Kim has needed help with her injuries, and she’s strong. Alessia needed therapy for her mental health, do you think she’s weak? We’ve all struggled. We’ve all needed help, and we’ve all supported each other and accepted that. You need help, and we’ll help you, but you need to accept that and accept that you need help, or all of this will be for nothing.”

“I need help, I think.” You’d whispered in response. Your voice was hoarse, bare before the women before you. You felt weak, but only because you were exhausted– physically, spiritually… emotionally. You wondered, briefly, if you’d ever be okay again. 

The hands around you, the eyes on you, the people who cared so, so, so much about you knew that you would be. 

Even still, your recovery was not without its hard moments. 

However, your teammates were there for you every step of the way.

They were there when you were shaking and crying, with a headache rocking your world and making you feel as though your head would split open from your withdrawals.

They held you tight as you shattered, helping to piece you back together and listening to what you needed.

They were there when you were allowed back into practice, giggling and joking as you once had been. There was color to your skin and light in your eyes once more, and that was enough to set a fire in everyone’s bellies. You were going to be okay.

They were there, even still, when you finally, finally scored your first goal in over a year. 

You slotted the ball into the left corner and watched the net shudder as the ball connected with it. You were spinning in place, eyes wide and mouth open as Alessia’s arms flew up as if she were an airplane. 

Katie McCabe was sprinting at you from across the field, and Leah and Kim were patting you on the back and shouting in excitement as those on the field came to embrace you. Briefly, you were lifted up by a very, very passionate Irish woman before being set down. 

You felt like your heart had been lifted, too, even more so as you scored a hattrick in that game. 

Two years ago, you’d felt like everything was useless, and you’d become your biggest rival. Finally, you’d bested yourself.

Finally, you were free.

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso imagine #arsenal wfc #alessia russo x reader #kim little #leah williamson #lotte wubben moy #harper writes

[queen-of-reptiles]

𝙲𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚁𝚈

description: in which kyra cannot help but fall in love with the baby of the arsenal team, the 20 year old nicknamed 'cherry' was as sweet as anyone could be

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kyra cooney-cross x female reader

disclaimer: this is all fiction! Do not take any of this seriously.

warnings: just plain cuteness, like a few kisses and curse words but mainly just fluff and mutual pining

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uta (women)

mccard: guys i've added kyra to the gc !

goonerno.1: ayy, she finally got the right sim card

y/n: leah never say ayy again

thegoat: hi kyra!

beffy: hi!

kyra: hi guys!

y/n: hi kyra! <3

kyra: hi y/n! <3

foordfiesta: awww look at them! 😩

littlescott: you all better be on you way to training!

y/n sent a photo

y/n: on our way

kyra: 🚗🚗

beffy: hmmmm 😏

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y/n pulled up to her usual space, Leah already bending down to pick up the sign which said 'cherry's space' on it as she pulled in. y/n laughed at the blonde who waved at her as she waved back.

"Thanks for driving me." Kyra repeats for what felt like the hundredth time to y/n.

"Of course!" y/n smiles, leaning over to peck Kyra's cheek before getting out and running over to Leah to hug the blonde. Kyra follows, gaping dumbly as she holds her bag with shaky hands.

"You okay Kyra?" Leah asks the girl with a smirk. Kyra nods, rubbing her arms in the November wind.

"Are you cold?" y/n asks worriedly before tugging her jacket off and wrapping it around the Australian.

"I'm fine." Kyra promises but a raised brow from y/n has her blushing and shutting up.

"Ayy, cherry!" An Irish voice calls out, y/n suddenly being hoisted over Katie's shoulder as she carried her inside, Kyra watches with a laugh as Leah picks up y/n's discarded bag.

Caitlin follows Katie inside, shrieking when Kyra launched herself onto her back, groaning as the twenty-one year old clung onto her with a cheeky grin.

"I've brought her!" Katie yells as she kicks open the door and places y/n down, the girls in the locker room laughing as y/n spins and sends a wave.

"Bag." Leah warns as y/n moves to her locker.

"Oh, thanks Leah!" y/n grins, kissing the blonde on the cheek as Kyra follows her to their lockers, which happened to be next to each other.

The two changed quickly, talking and giggling as they did so, the team around them sending them knowing looks as y/n finally sat on the bench waiting for Kyra.

"Here!" y/n chimes, moving Kyra's foot onto her lap and tying the laces, before tapping the other thigh.

Kyra flushes pink, switching her feet to let y/n tie the other lace and once she has removes her foot all together from her lap. Caitlin watches from the doorway a smirk on her face.

"Thanks." Kyra smiles, y/n grins kissing her cheek before running over to Katie who wraps and arm around her shoulders and tugs her outside.

"Awww, kywa got a cwush." Caitlin teases as Kyra rolls her eyes and shoves her into the lockers. "Oi!" Caitlin yells, chasing after Kyra who runs away.

Katie and y/n turn to see Kyra waiting behind the tunnel as as Caitlin comes out, shouting her name, Kyra sticks her foot out, grinning widely as she watches Caitlin sprawl on the floor.

"Enjoy your trip!" Kyra calls before Caitlin scrambles up. "Uh oh." She realises before screeching and running from her angry friend.

Kyra moved quickly, barrelling into y/n who gasped as they sprawled out along the floor. y/n groaned as Leah stormed over, her and Steph gripping Kyra under the arms and pulling her to her feet.

"Careful!" Steph chides Kyra as Katie helps y/n onto her feet, the player wincing as she presses a hand to her ribs.

"y/n I'm so sorry." Kyra says but y/n just smiles at her kindly as she reassures her that it was okay.

"No it is not, we know how easily she gets injured." Leah chides. Katie moves and picks y/n up, the girl laughing and clinging to her like a koala, running her away from Kyra who pouts.

"Come on kid." Leah sighs, pulling Kyra into a walk to join the group.

The group finally start training, going through their stretches and runs up and down the pitch, warming their bodies up to get into a solid training session.

They are told to pair up and Kyra slides next to y/n, the two sharing a grin before Caitlin and Katie appear either side of them.

"Kyra, you're with Caitlin, Cherry you're with me." Katie warns.

"Aw. Okay!" y/n shrugs, taking Katie's hand and pulling here to get a ball.

"How'd you get stuck with me?" Kyra asked Caitlin who had glared at Katie.

"We played rock, paper, scissors." Caitlin huffed and Kyra sighed, looking over at y/n one more time, but the girl was too focused on the drill she was doing with Katie.

Caitlin and Kyra usually fought like sisters, Kyra was nothing short of complete chaos and it did Caitlin's head in to the upmost. However, Caitlin watched her younger teammate watch y/n.

The way her entire body had tensed while she watched her, arms floppy in front of her like she was mimicking a T-Rex. Her eyes glued tightly to y/n.

"You really like her, huh kid?" Caitlin asks Kyra who looks over at her with a defeated sigh.

"She's like my best friend. But she's so pretty." Kyra admits softly and Caitlin sighs, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her away.

"Come on, lets go kick some balls." Caitlin says and Kyra hums.

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Eventually training came to a stop for lunch, the group of footballers all piling in to the cafeteria. Kyra looked around, trying to catch a wisp of y/n's hair as she grabbed her lunch.

"Kyra!" y/n called, already sat with Beth and Viv, she gestured the girl over and Kyra bounded, almost leaping into the seat next to her.

"Hey." Kyra breathed with a smile.

"Hi." y/n smiled. "I got you some strawberries, there weren't any left after this." She adds and Kyra flushes pink once again.

"Thanks Cherry." Kyra smiles, y/n flushing at the nickname.

Beth and Viv share an exasperated look, almost in shock of how oblivious the two idiots were as the continue to talk and giggle with one another.

As they ate, y/n found her ankle hooked around Kyra's, the girl's arm wrapped around her shoulder as she ate her strawberries with the other hand.

The four on the table were discussing Beth and Viv's new puppy, happily chatting away, unaware of the amount of team-members that were snapping photos of Kyra and y/n.

y/n's head leaned onto Kyra's shoulder as she continued to talk to Beth, Kyra's sweet smell infected y/n and she couldn't help but sink closer into Kyra's side.

"Comfy?" A voice asks, and suddenly Kyra and y/n are pulled apart, Leah pushing herself between the two and wrapping an arm around both of their shoulders.

"Yeah I was." y/n pouted, Kyra however rolled her eyes and pushed her elbow into Leah's side, the blonde yelping before turning to y/n.

"Come on munchkin, let's get to the gym for strength training." Leah says to y/n who nods and the two get up as Kyra watches.

"What did I do wrong?" Kyra asks Beth and Viv who both sigh.

"Leah is just protective of Cherry, has been for years." Viv explains kindly to Kyra.

"They grew up together, from the same place, trained together, and when Cherry made her first debut 4 years ago, take a wild guess who calmed her down from her panic attack." Beth says and Kyra sighs.

"It'll be fine." Viv promises Kyra. "Don't worry..." She begins.

"Be happy." Beth sings, interrupting her as she and Kyra start singing said song, both pointing at Viv to finish the chorus for them.

"I don't like it." Viv states, before getting up and walking off, leaving Beth and Kyra to finish the chorus together.

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uta (women)

foordka: everyone who wants to know, the shrieking cats are beth and kyra who are running down the corridor screaming 'don't worry be happy'. 👍

goonerno.1: wondered what it was!

y/n: it is very off key 🫣

kyra: how dare you! we sound beautiful

y/n: you are beatiful - text deleted

y/n: keep dreaming CC 😙

beffy: OI CHERRY

y/n: see if Jen's guitar can save you

beattiejuice: it cannot

littlescott: if the SIX OF YOU are not in the gym in ONE MINUTE you will be doing bulgarian squats for twenty minutes

beffy: OMW!

kyra: please no, please

mccard: jesus - keep ya hair on we're coming

y/n: i don't understand how I read Katie's texts in her voice 🤨

foordka: because she's got an annoying voice!

mccard: OI

y/n: HAHAHAHHA 🤣

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Once the gym session had finished and everyone was showered and ready to go home, Kyra had looked across at y/n hopefully, the girl not having seen y/n much in the past few hours due to Leah keeping y/n protectively close.

"Do you wanna come round for dinner tonight, munchkin?" Leah asks y/n who was trying to pull on a jumper.

"Um." y/n says, stuck in her sweater.

Kyra giggles and leans over, pulling the jumper over the red sports bra y/n had on and the girl grinned in thanks, Kyra sending her a smile back.

"I can't tonight, sorry Lee!" y/n smiles and Leah huffs. "I promised Kyra we'd have a movie night, we've already postponed twice." She adds.

"No junk food and not too many sweets, you have a game tomorrow." Kim calls. "Early night." She adds.

"Okay Kimmy!" y/n calls before Leah sighs and kisses y/n on the forehead.

"Okay, have fun." Leah says and y/n grins, yelling out a goodbye to everyone before grabbing Kyra's wrist and tugging her out of the room, Kyra yelping in shock.

Leah watches them go with narrowed eyes, arms folded as Kim comes over and pats her on the back, sending her a pointed look which made the blonde defender huff.

"I don't like it." Leah denies.

"Kyra's a good kid, and they are cute together." Kim chides.

"Still don't like it." Leah mutters.

In the car park, y/n and Kyra were now in her car, Kyra fixing on some music as y/n slowly pulled out the two driving toward their usual coffee spot which they went to.

"Sorry to take you from Leah." Kyra said sheepishly and y/n shrugs.

"I don't mind Ky, I spend two nights with her anyway." y/n giggles. "Besides, I like spending time with you." She adds, pink heating her cheeks up.

"I like spending time with you too." Kyra says quietly, smiling softly as y/n pulls up in the parking space. The two get out heading into the coffee shop to order their drinks which are quickly given to them.

"Smile!" y/n calls, taking a photo of Kyra sat on the bench, she glares and whips out her own phone, y/n screeching as she tries to hide her face. "Stop, stop!" y/n calls, almost beggingly.

"Why?" Kyra asks. "I think you beautiful." She adds as she pockets her phone and y/n looks up at her. "Not as beautiful as me of course." Kyra hums and y/n laughs, moving over to shove her.

"Dork." y/n laughs and Kyra smiles, y/n's laugh making her feel like mush. "Come on, let's go get our snacks. I've got our chicken pasta ingredients already." She hums.

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y/n just posted on their story

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kyracooneyx just posted on her story

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The two had started movie nights a few months ago, making them a weekly thing after Kyra joined and y/n did her best to make her welcome.

The two had seen a creamy, chicken and spinach tagliatelle meal and made it that evening, the two making it every week together there after.

The plates now sat on the side, the two having completely licked them clean, and they sat close together, oversized hoodies on as they watched Friday Night Dinner, a TV show Kyra had found a lot of humour in.

y/n moved under the blanket, pushing herself closer to Kyra and onto the girl's shoulder, Kyra let out a breath and wrapped an arm around her pulling her closer.

"You're so warm." y/n hummed, as if she was a purring cat. Kyra giggled and lent back against the sofa arm, pulling y/n with her so the two were happily cuddling on the sofa.

"I really like this." Kyra said after a moment. y/n slides up slightly, so she could see her face, trying to decipher the words.

"Me too." She tells the Australian who watches her.

"I really like you." Kyra says after another moment. "Really like you." She adds and y/n smiles shyly.

"Really?" She asks and Kyra nods. "I really like you to." y/n hums, her fingers tucking a strand of Kyra's hair behind her ear. "Really like you." She adds.

Kyra grins, her eyes shining excitedly as she suddenly races forward, her forehead slightly bumping y/n's as she kissed her. y/n gasped, not expecting it but quickly sunk into the kiss. Ignoring the head bump from Kyra's enthusiasm.

The two held their lips together, hearts both beating nervously as they did so, their hands found each other and they held on tightly, pulling each other closer.

Kyra hummed happily into the kiss, having been waiting for it the moment she met y/n, and when they finally pulled away, Kyra couldn't help but run her fingers over y/n's lips.

"Cherry lip balm." Kyra whispers, y/n giggling softly.

"Thought it was appropriate when I first bought it." She admits and Kyra smiles, before gasping.

"Leah's going to kill me." She realises.

"Maybe." A voice says and the two turn to see Leah, spare key in hand and y/n's kit bag in the other.

"Oh shit." Kyra says.

"Definitely." Leah then says and Kyra screeches before throwing y/n back onto the sofa and sprinting toward her room.

"Leah no!" y/n tries but the blonde has already run after her.

"You break her I break you!"

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y/n just posted on their close friends story

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kyracooneyx just posted on her close friends story

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uta (women) foordka: NO FUCKING WAY 😭😭😭

mccard: I CANNOT BELIEVE IT 😭

littlescott: so happy for you two trouble makers 😌

beffy: literally crying - i was so sick of the pining

thegoat: proud of you both!

beattiejuice: cuteeeeee!!! 😍😍

angelotte: aren't you two the sweetest

y/n: thank you all - however we won't be if leah keeps trying to kill her 😞

beffy: WHAT

mccard: hell no - I've waited too fookin long for this

foordka: we're on our way

catlady - but she has a dog: I'm already here 😎

y/n: i texted steph first - and she got here in fuckin moments it was crazy

littlescott: i'm omw too!

y/n just sent a photo

y/n: please come quick

thegoat: i'm going to bed...

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private message from goonerno.1

goonerno.1: you're such a snitch

y/n: ...

goonerno.1: if she upsets you - if she even annoys you - you come to me okay?

y/n: love you lee xx

goonerno.1: love you too kiddo x

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END

Arsenal babies do your thing !!!! xoxo <3

#woso #woso x reader #woso x y/n #social media woso #woso community #woso soccer #kyra cooney cross #kyra cooney cross x y/n #kyra cooney cross imagine #kyra cooney cross x reader #arsenal wfc #arsenal #arsenal women x reader #arsenal women #leah williamson #kim little #katie mccabe #vivianne miedema #beth mead and vivianne miedema #beth mead #caitlin foord #steph catley #lotte wubben moy #jen beattie #alessia russo

[samkerrworshipper]

revival | arsenal x reader

arsenal reader has been struggling more than she’d ever admit.. when it becomes to much she attempts to take her life but her teammates refuse to let her kill herself when she has so much more to live for.

warnings: do not read if you are triggered by suicide attempt, pill overdose, cutting, severe depression, angst, hurt/comfort

You didn’t know what had gotten you to this stage. Sitting on the bathroom floor of your apartment, staring down at an empty bottle of pills lying beside you on the floor. You weren’t sure exactly what had gotten you here, weren’t sure what switch had flicked in your brain this morning that had made you feel so positively broken from the inside out.

All you know is that right now you can feel deep purple, mauve and maroon bruises developing on your knees, from being hunched over the toilet bowl for so long.

Just when you begin to think that you’re empty, just when you think that there is nothing more that could be ripped away from you, you feel your muscles tense again as more bile is released.

Obviously, you knew the concoction of pills you took wouldn’t sit well, but you didn’t realise it would kick in this fast. You’d figured you’d have time to come to terms with the end of your life, or at least have time to scribble out a not.

But, all the pills you’d forced down your throat now resided in the toilet bowl, a mixture of stomach acid and medication pooling on the surface of the water.

It’s then that you make the decision that it’s time to take a different approach.

As you palm the metal blade, the cold sharp edge gently digging into your skin.

All you can think about is your team, your family, your home.

You think of the cold meal sitting on your kitchen bench.

At first, the metal burns, it stings and sears.

Almost as painful as the burning tears leaking down your cheeks.

Slowly, as more pressure is applied, your wrist is warmed by the pooling scarlett puddle dripping down onto the bright white tiles.

You’ve been sitting on the cold floor for way too long for your liking, your wrists pressed to the flooring to try and calm the burning sensation that’s spread all across your forearms.

If you try hard enough, you can convince yourself that the burning sensation is just another football injury.

You try and picture it, lying on the grass of a pitch, your arm throbbing with pain.

It only works for as long as your brain believes it, which is a total of ten seconds.

It’s been a long day, long week, long month, long year.

A long time pretending you're happy.

A long time try to convince everyone you’re happy.

A long time trying to persuade yourself that you’re happy.

A long time lying.

You’ve become so consumed with the lies that it’s hard to not be completely committed to them at this stage.

The only thing that reminds you of exactly where you are is the cold tiles against your arms, the warm blood and cold tiles mixing together like a thunderstorm.

The only sound to be heard across your apartment is the steady sound of blood dripping onto the tiles.

You think about your goodbyes, think about how this is the end, that you are content with this being it for you.

You’ve been at peace with this decision for a long while, longer than you’d ever care to admit.

It’s not really a decision for you, more like a losing battle.

In the last year, you’ve lost more of yourself than you thought possible, you don’t feel like you belong to yourself anymore, you don’t belong to yourself anymore. At one stage, a while ago, you loved yourself, you cared about yourself, you did your best to care. It hurt, feeling like you were no longer a owner of your body, maybe if you weren’t no longer classified as two different parts would you feel this way, or maybe it would make it harder, because maybe it wouldn’t feel like you were just getting rid of a body that you no longer belonged to, this was all to easy.

Your body was now something to be sold, something to be advertised, something to be purchased by the public.

You supposed that came from being a champion, being famous, being good at what you did.

Maybe, if you’d never become a famous soccer player none of this would have happened, you wouldn’t be lying on your bathroom floor, your vision slowly blurring and your blood leaking out steadily from your arms.

You walk towards the darkness, allowing it to embrace you as you slowly approach it without any resistance.

There was no fight for you, no hope or thoughts of redemption, this was your end, your demise, your final page, and that was okay.

You let the darkness completely cloud your vision, your body slowly being wrapped up by the accepting white light at the end of the tunnel.

It’s warm and comforting and you let your body rest, let it finally have the respite that it was so desperate for.

You felt yourself fade, far away with no intention of coming back.

You’d felt like you were gone, but you were brought back by more overwhelmingly white light in your vision.

Was this heaven?

Was this the end?

Was this it?

You were in pain, your head, your throat, your arms.

It was this thought that made you think you could be wrong.

Was this hell?

Or was the overwhelming white light just your bathroom tiles?

You cancelled out the tile idea, because you could feel your eyelids were closed, which meant that the white couldn’t be sourced from your home.

Your ears were ringing and as everything began to come back to you, it became terrifyingly clear that this could not be any of your previous assumptions.

Death wasn’t this painful, death wasn’t supposed to have any feeling.

Death didn’t feel like a warm bed and it definitely wasn’t consciousness.

This wasn’t the great beyond, this wasn’t the end, this was something else that you couldn’t quite pin down.

As your senses began to come back to you, your hearing and slowly your consciousness you began to become certain that whatever this was, it was not your end.

The sound of a constant machine beeping gave you an inkling as to where you might be, you just silently prayed that you were wrong, silently prayed that you would wake up in your red soaked tile bathroom and not a hospital.

You could clean up, try again.

You couldn’t handle being forced to recover, being forced to talk about your feelings.

It wasn’t something on your agenda, it wasn’t a part of your intricate demise.

You didn’t want to open your eyes, you weren’t even sure if you could, but you wanted to understand your situation, to understand what was happening.

So, you used every piece of your energy that was left, to every so slowly crack open your eyes.

It was more overwhelming white, that took a good deal of blinking to work through, but eventually, a blurry version of your surroundings began to appear in the corners of your eyes.

It confirmed your suspicions, you were in a hospital.

Which you hated, but you had also been prepared for, it made you feel insanely unaccomplished.

It took a lot of blinking and squinting for you to fully take in your surroundings.

The part that stumped you the most, and made you feel like you were hallucinating was the sea of red hoodies that were sitting, sleeping and lying around your room.

It was dark outside, the room was still lit up with machines and the bright white light from the corridor, but you figured that most of your teammates were fast asleep.

It was good, it gave you some extra time to take in your surroundings.

You were covered in cords and wires, your body completely moving even as you tried your very hardest.

Both of your wrists were bandaged tightly, to the point where you were completely unable to even wiggle your fingers.

It was daunting to you, the complete inability to do anything but lie in the bed and bear witness to your inability to do anything besides that.

Just as you were beginning to get truly distressed, one of the red blobs in your peripheral popped up out of their seat, making their way over to your bedside and tracing their hand over your one.

“Hey, ducky, it’s okay, I’ve got you, deep breaths. You’re okay.”

It’s Beth’s voice that hits your ears, and it has the reverse effect, making you more stressed out about the fact that she’s here witnessing this.

“Honey, it’s okay, big deep breaths for me, you’re okay.”

Beth’s hand moves up to your chest, your chest that is covered with a scratchy hospital gown.

“I shouldn’t be here, I-I-I’m supposed to be dead.”

Your words are croaky and chesty, almost unrecognisable but Beth manages to decipher them, and it almost brings tears to her eyes.

“Hey, hey, absolutely not. I thank every single god that you're here and awake right now, it is a miracle that you are here.”

This was not a miracle.

This was a fucking tragedy.

Beth’s face though, it was enough to send a deep pain to your stomach, deep guttural pain that hurt more than anything else.

“S-should be dead, wish I was dead.”

Beth’s face just drops, tears springing from her eyes and falling down onto the hospital sheets.

“Ducky, I promise you, we are all going to try our very hardest to make sure you never feel like that again. Get some more rest, we can sort this all out in the morning but you need your sleep, your body needs rest.”

You didn’t have energy to argue with Beth, so you nodded, relaxing back against the pillows and letting sleep and darkness return to the forefront of your brain.

When you awoke for the second time, it was less painful.

The sun was up this time, your room flooded with early sunbeams.

Overall the hospital was abuzz, to your extreme displeasure.

You were met with the eyes of some of your closest teammates, your words under the stars with Beth at the forefront of your mind as you looked at the extreme disappointment and sadness playing across their faces.

It hit home for you.

They all shared the same expression, all of you sharing the same situation that none of you wanted to be a part of.

“Hey Ducky, how are you feeling?”

Katie’s voice breaks the silence, her tone is full of emotion and you watch her mouth twitch to the side as she obviously tries her hardest to conceal the emotions that she is feeling.

“Like I wish I was dead.”

Nobody laughs, nobody says anything besides purse their lips and bite their tongues.

“We’re so glad you aren’t though, and we’re going to help you.”

We’re going to help you.

It’s five words, seven syllables, and the words that you least want to hear.

“Why couldn’t you just let me die?”

Your words manage to bring tears to the eyes of some of your teammates, you don’t care, all you can think about is the fact that someone, one of your teammates, had the fucking audacity to save you.

Leah’s the person to stand up, and take the same spot that Beth did last night, directly by your side, her hand resting on your own.

“Why didn’t I let you die? Why did I perform half an hour of chest compressions waiting for an ambulance whilst you bled out on your bathroom floor? Because you have a life that’s worth living, you have a gift for football, you are one of the brightest, happiest, smartest, best people I have ever met y/n, and this isn’t the end for you, it can’t be.”

You couldn’t meet Leah’s eyes, not with the knowledge that she had done this to you, she was the reason you were lying in a hospital bed instead of a coffin.

“You should have left me to die.”

Your words are broken, split in half by the knowledge that you were still fucking alive.

“You have a life worth living, kid, you’re only 21, there is so much more you have to give and I’ll be damned if this is it for you.”

You can’t meet any of your teammates' eyes, because it’s clear that they completely disagree with your actions, but there is still a part of you in your head telling you that everything would be better off if you were dead.

Your teammates wouldn’t have to pretend they care, they wouldn’t have too busy themselves with trying to save you from your impending death.

If you had any choice in it, you wouldn’t be this way.

If you could, you’d be happy and smiley, sweet, kind and soft. You’d be consistently happy, you would be the person smiling no matter what and someone easy to talk to, someone easy to love, someone that people wouldn’t let slip away.

You don’t have a choice though, this is who you are.

You are rough edges. You are a poorly labelled bottle of poison that people choke on as soon as they come into contact. You are a box of glass with a fragile sticker plastered all over and yet you still break, harming anyone who comes into contact.

When life gets hard, you quit.

There’s no way to explain why, everyone loves you until life is real and you need help, everyone is understanding until life isn’t pretty anymore.

You’ve never been loved through your lowest moments.

Never been loved when you can’t bring yourself to get out of bed, let alone shower.

Never been loved when the only thing that's playing in your head is how much you hate yourself.

Never been loved when the part of you that everyone loves suddenly dies.

Somedays, you are fairly certain that you are impossible to love. You don't know the kind of happiness love provides, you don’t know how to open up or trust, because no one ever loved you enough for that.

Other days, you remember that you are only 21, and maybe one day it won’t be this way.

You wish you were tender, you wished you were glowy and soft.

You wished you were Beth or Jen, always happy and ready to make anyone who was feeling down feel a little bit better.

“Why couldn’t you have just let me die?”

Your cheeks are practically drowning in tears, Leah reaches up to wipe them, you try to stop her but you instead moan in pain as the searing burn spreads backup your arms.

At the sound of your discomfort Leah is recoiling immediately, her hands falling down to your tightly wrapped arms and pressing them gently back down into the blankets.

“Hey, no, these need rest, you did some serious nerve damage, we won’t know the severity until you’ve got some strength back.”

Fuck.

“Nerve damage?”

Collateral damage had never crossed your mind, because you weren’t supposed to be alive right now, so why would collateral damage matter?

“Yeah, you could have severed or done some serious damage to your nerves, if they are cut then you’ll need a nerve replacement to regain the sensation.”

You blink a few times, staring up at the roof and willing the tears leaking down your face to fo away.

“I should have died.”

Leah, in all of her honesty, nods.

“Yeah, you should have. They had to pump your stomach to get rid of all the drugs you’d consumed, and you need 38 stitches and three pints of blood. You should be dead, but you aren’t and the fact that you aren’t is a fucking miracle.”

You wouldn’t call this a miracle, not from any point of view.

“When can I play again?”

You’re not sure if you’ll make it till that point, but it’s a question worth asking, there are big things coming up, on both a national and club level.

“Excuse me?”

Leah is shocked, and extremely taken aback by your question, so much so that she just stutters over her words.

Before she chokes on her words, Katie steps in.

“Kid, you almost died yesterday.”

You shrug, you figured it was a question worth asking, but Katie’s voice told you that to her it was a stupid question.

“A week? Two weeks? A month?”

You're grasping for something, trying to find the long straw in a pile of short ones.

“Kid, you tried to kill yourself, you almost succeeded, there are bigger things to focus on for you right now then getting on the pitch.”

A part of your brain disagrees so heavily.

“I have to go, they’ll take my passport and my licence and I’ll never be allowed to play again.”

All of the girls share knowing looks, but the general idea is that there is a general discomfort across the room.

“Ducky, look at me.”

It’s Katie’s strong Irish accent, the voice she uses when she’s captaining her national team that forces your eyes from the roof to meet her own.

“They can’t make you do anything, you need to be here right now. There is a treatment plan, you tried to kill yourself, you can’t just leave, it doesn’t work that way.”

Your brain is screaming inside of your skull, pounding against the bone and muscle.

“Jorge never let us take a break, he told us if we ever tried to leave that they would take all of our identification, and our licence to play, I have to play, I was born to play, it’s the only thing I have.”

Slowly, without the efforts of any of the girls, you are starting to unearth some of the serious problems you’ve been dealing with for the last little while, especially coming off of the world cup.

They’d all noticed the change, noticed how after your national teams win, how parts of you had changed.

They all had their assumptions, especially after what happened with Jenni Hermoso and after some conversations with some of their Spanish companions, but nobody could provide an explanation for what was happening behind closed doors.

It was no secret to any of your teammates that Jorge was your biggest critiquer, you and Mapi had tried sticking up to him at the beginning of his career with the Spanish team, and it had landed you both in deep water.

Mapi, had been intelligent enough to leave the toxic environment when it had become too much, when it had seriously begun to affect her mental health.

You however, were not as good at identifying your emotions, and taking care of them, you pushed yourself to the point of breakage, this was a perfect example of that.

“Ducky, Vilda is gone now, you don’t have to worry, I’ll call Alexia, she’ll understand and she’ll talk to them for you. You need a break sweetheart, you need to talk about why you're struggling, there are bigger things to focus on right now than your career.”

You couldn’t disagree more, you were in your prime, you didn’t have time to take a break.

You also didn’t have time to live, there was nothing that plagued your mind more than the idea of trying again, as soon as you could remove yourself from the conservatorship of your arsenal teammates.

“I need to leave, I want to be discharged.”

It’s an attempt at regaining some of your dignity, one that doesn’t last very long.

“You’re on a 72 hour psych hold, 24/7 supervision whilst you're recovering. Everyday you will see a psychologist and after the 72 hours they’ll deem if you are ready to leave, if they believe you can be trusted to leave then you’ll go home with Beth and Viv for the foreseeable future. For the first few weeks, you’ll be under complete supervision, you’ll see a therapist every few days and once you’ve made some serious progress we’ll look at getting you back into training.”

You forced yourself to take a deep breath, and a big gulp, trying to force down the lump that was prominent in your throat.

“You can’t do that, I don’t want to see a therapist, I don’t need to see a therapist.”

Most of the women in the room roll their eyes.

“Ducky, we’ve all been worried about you for weeks, but you refuse to talk to any of us, clearly something led to this and if you won’t talk to us about it you need to talk to a professional.”

You don’t want to admit that a part of you is secretly terrified of seeing a therapist, because what if they see right through you? What if all they see is all of your insecurities and imperfections, just as Jorge did?

“I can’t see a therapist, don’t wanna.”

Before Katie can speak, previously silent Viv stands up at her seat and joins the crowd around your bedside.

“I know it's scary, kid. I started seeing someone when I was around your age and struggling. It was so hard, it was terrifying. I didn’t want to admit I was struggling, and then one of my teammates caught me harming myself whilst having an anxiety attack. I had to go see one to play again, and it sucked to start with, but it helped me so much, we all just want the best for you, and you need help, there is nothing wrong with accepting that.”

The remaining women sitting in the room stand up, surrounding your bedside.

Beth, Leah, Katie, Caitlin, Lia, Kim, Steph, Viv, Jen, Laura and Lotte.

It’s a crowd, and the taller girls have to stand behind because they don’t all fit, and even if they aren’t directly hugging you, you are overwhelmed with the amount of love radiating off of them, it’s too much.

“No-no, I can’t do this, you guys can’t do this to me. There is nothing wrong with me, I’m fine, I’m fucking fine.”

It’s clear that none of them believe you, you expect them to step back, but they don’t.

“No you’re not liefje, people who seriously try to take their lives are not okay. You don’t have to be, we’re all here to support you, you just need to let us, let us be here for you, let us be a shoulder for you to cry on.”

Your breaths shudder, you can’t meet any of their eyes, it hurts you to know that they all think this of you.

“I didn’t mean to.”

It’s a lie that you push out, you're trying to find anything to argue about, anything to distract from what was actually happening.

“Ducky, it would be okay if you did. You’ve been struggling and it’s understandable. All we want from now on is for you to be honest with us, no judgement, just tell us what you are feeling.”

Beth’s voice is so soft, you almost want to give in, but Vilda is in your head, screaming at you for being weak and vulnerable after passing out on the pitch after playing with the flu, and your reminded once again that there isn’t space in the world for people like you to have feelings.

“I want you to fucking believe me when I tell you that I am fine and stop suffocating me.”

All of the women share looks above your head, and somehow, telepathically, majority of them sag off from the huddle, leaving you room.

You're left with the main group of girls who have been controlling the situation.

Viv, Beth, Leah, Kim and Katie.

“liefde, you clearly aren’t fine. Whatever it is, you can talk to us, we’re here for you, whatever you need.”

It shouldn’t cause you to break down, but the pain in your heart and the look in Viv’s eyes sends you barrelling over a very high cliff.

You're sobbing, and struggling to breathe, blood rushing to your ears and preventing you from feeling anything besides the deep depression that has been building up in you for years now.

It hits you like a double decker bus.

Before you can really start to panic though, someone is climbing onto the bed beside you, bringing you into their lap and arms and embracing you.

“It’s okay ducky, we’ve got you, you’re safe with us.”

The sweet nothings are murmured lowly into your ear, the genuinity continuing until the mixture of a mental breakdown and panic attack subside and you’re just a tired, pained mess.

“M’ sorry.”

Your words are hummed into the chest of whoever has climbed in beside you in the hospital bed.

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, do you want to talk about it?”

The long answer is no, you don’t want to talk about any of it, but you can’t help the sense that a part of you might feel a little bit better if you let something off your chest.

“Talk about what?”

It’s a genuine question, because there is so much happening in your brain that you aren’t even sure where to start.

“Whatever you’d like.”

You think that’s a stupid statement, because for all Leah knows you could want to talk about the weather, and that doesn’t seem particularly helpful.

“Jorge?”

It seems like starting with the source of your problems probably saves yourself from a lot of beating astound the bush.

“If that’s what you want, ducky, we’re all just here to listen to you, no matter what it is.”

You peak your head out of Leah’s sweater, and you’re met with the supportive faces of the four other women sitting around your bedside.

“When I started for him I was 16. For a long while, the older girls shielded me from him, Mapi and Jenni especially. But my young innocence only lasted so long, when I was 19, he did some really fucked up things, that was when he changed. Mapi, Claudia, Patri and I were the ones who spoke out, and it was the right thing to do, but it put a target on our backs immediately, especially with Alexia out with her ACL injury and unable to support us all. He was so mean to us all, always criticising, never giving us breaks, running us till we were sick or injuring ourselves. He used to wake us up at 2am in the morning to go running because he said we were getting lazy. It was around then that they all signed the statement to withdraw, and I would have loved to do it with them, but I just couldn’t. It only got worse from there for me, especially during the world cup, I was having panic attacks everyday and he couldn’t have cared less. All he did was push me, to the point where Alexia had to mind me everyday because of how bad I was getting.”

You took a deep breath, you wouldn’t allow yourself to look at them, not right now, not until you were done.

“That was when I started to think about killing myself. It wasn’t because I don’t love my life and my friends, but, Jorge was devoting his life to making mine a living hell, and nobody wants that. He never had anything nice to say to me, always criticism, always negativity. Then we won, and none of it mattered, but then there was everything in the press, and I was being slaughtered for all of it because apparently I was enabling his abuse, and I can’t handle that, I can’t handle being told that I enabled abuse that I was dealt for years, maybe I should have told someone, but who? All of the physios, all the doctors, they all worked for him, nobody was going to turn on him. He created an environment where all of us girls were miserable and competing against each other for no reason.”

Leah stopped you with a bone crushing hug.

They’d all heard stories about the Spanish Women’s team, speculation, rumours, hearsay.

But hearing first hand experience from their teammate, somebody they loved, it killed them all on the insides, because how could someone treat their ducky like that? How could someone be so horrible?

“Thank you for trusting us to tell us that ducky. You didn’t deserve any of that, nobody does. From now on, we’re all here for you, you don’t have to hide it all, no more hiding, we’re here for you every step of the way.”

You try your hardest to believe Leah, but it’s a uphill battle, especially when your brain is conditioned to think she is lying.

Leah seemed to notice how spent you were, your body completely relaxed against her, your state near catatonic.

“Get some sleep ducky, we’ve got you, I promise we’ll do everything to make sure you never feel like this again.”

When Leah says it, you believe her, because there is one thing that your mind can’t betray you about, and that is that Leah, and all the other women surrounding you would do anything to protect you, and to make sure that you felt loved, to make up for the lack that you’d been experiencing for the last while.

#woso #woso community #leah williamson #arsenal wfc #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson x arsenal #arsenalwfc #arsenal x reader #arsenal women #arsenal #leah williamson imagine #kim little #beth mead #woso imagines #woso x reader #woso imagine #love angst #baby vivi #vivianne miedema #meadema #katie mccabe #katie mccabe x reader #kim little x reader

[chaotic-toasters]

wHy wOulD yOu dO tHiS iN tHe LiViNg rOoM?

Caitlin Foord x Teen!Reader (Platonic)

TW: Alludes (mentions of?) to smut, no actual graphic descriptions or anything

Minors DNI just to be safe

-------------------

"-No, of course not," you scoffed to your former teammate as you walked onto the driveway. "That's summin' Kyra would do, not me."

Jen smiled. "Well, you might do it if you're sleep deprived. You're nearly as crazy as Kyra when you don't get your rest."

You climbed the steps, pulling your key out of your pocket. "I take offense to that, Beats. No one likes being compared to Kyra, ever. Don't tell her I said tha-aUGH!"

You didn't know what you were expecting when you opened the door, but it was not your sister engaging in... sexual activities with your third captain.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" your hands flew up to cover your eyes as you stumbled about, hitting your back on the doorframe and falling over as Jen sat on the other end of the line, confused. "CAITLIN!"

The frantic rustling of clothing sounded out. "I-"

"wHy wOuLd yOu dO tHiS iN tHe LiViNg rOoM?" You shrieked, voice pitch rapidly changing as you shot to your feet. "YoUr liTtLe siStEr lIvEs wItH yOU!"

Caitlin's Aussie accent was thick with embarrassment. "Y/N, you said you wouldn't be home 'till tomorrow!"

You screamed, blindly sprinting out of the house, phone forgotten on the floor with your hands clawing at your eyes. You didn't even know where you were going, but you from the aggressive honking of cars, you'd crossed the street at least twice. Thankfully for you, your feet had brought you to a familiar house in St. Albans.

"KIM! KIM! KIIIIIM!" you sobbed, desperately banging on the wooden door as the earlier image lingered in your mind. "KIIII-HIII-HIM!"

Your captain yanked the door open, clad in old Arsenal sweats and a jumper. "What happened, Y/N? Are you alright?"

"Caitlin and and and Katie THEYAUAHAUHAUHLBLUHUUHUH!" You babbled, hands rubbing frantically at your eyes like someone had pepper-sprayed you in the face. "AUAHAABUHHUH!"

"Caitlin and Katie what, sweetheart?" Kim pulled you inside worriedly, moving you into a sitting position on the floor and joining you after closing the door. "I can't understand you."

"THEY WERE HAVING SE- SEH—"

Kim gently pried your hands from your eyes as you launched your face into her shoulder, lips pressed into a thin line. "Did you knock, kiddo?"

"THEY WERE IN THE LIVING ROOM!" you cried hysterically, shaking your head as you tried to shake the ghost image. "I DON'T 'WIKE IT!"

The Scot choked on her spit. "What?!"

As you screamed bloody murder into her shoulder, Kim reached for her phone, dialing your national team captain's number. "Steph? Can you and Leah go to Caitlin's flat? She and Katie need a stern talkin' to."

"Why?" you could hear the defender ask.

"They were doing it in the living room. Y/n's in bits."

"Put Y/N on the phone."

Kim obliged, holding the phone to your ear.

"Hey, kiddo—"

"THEY WERE DOING—THEY WERE— THEY AUHHAUGHH—" you cried again, struggling to free your hands from Kim's firm grasp. "I STILL SEE IT, I STILL SEE ITTT!"

Steph sighed. "We're on our way."

"Thanks, Steph, I'll talk to you later. Bye," Kim hung up the phone, wrapping you up in a tight hug as you squirmed. "It's okay, Y/N, it's okay."

You dug your face deeper into her shoulder with a whine. "I don't wanna go back there, Kimmy. I don't wanna."

She murmured her agreement. "You can stay in the spare room tonight, kiddo. I'll have Steph and Leah pick up some of your stuff, and we'll figure out the rest tomorrow."

-------------------

"Hey, Y/N, how's it‐ why are your eyes so red?" Cloe questioned as she sat next to you in her own cubby, concerned. "Have you been crying?"

"Maybe," you answered hoarsely. "I don't know."

Steph whispered something into the Canadian's ear, your teammates eyes filling with surprise and pity. "Oof, sorry, kid."

"Me too, Cloe," you mumbled miserably. "Me too."

The last of the gunners filed into the changing room, your sister one of them. "Y/N, could you step outside so we ca—"

You screamed at the top of your lungs, jolting away and diving into Cloe's arms. "NO!"

"Give her time, Cait," Steph advised, directing her away from you. "You might've scarred her for life."

You sniffled in Cloe's comforting hold. "Why did you have to be the naked one?"

Katie shrugged apologetically. "She is a pillow princess."

You shrieked. "EWWW!"

What am I doing

#Woso x reader #Caitlin Foord x Reader #Caitlin Foord #Arsenal wfc x Reader #Arsenal women x Reader #Arsenal women #Arsenal wfc #kim little #cloe lacasse

[trulyhblue]

Carded

Alessia Russo x Aussie! Arsenal! Reader

Warnings: Little bit of angst, fluff, coarse language, suggestive if you squint.

Masterlist

________________________

Alessia were a bit like Katie in the sense of your aggression — or, rather 'passion' as you put it gently — on the field.

Arsenal had a rocky start to the season, with a loss against Liverpool to being dubbed as 'second-halfsenal', as your fans and rivals alike found the comedy in your troubles. There was no technical malice behind the name, the girls would joke about it ever so often during training, but that didn't stop the hidden linger of doubt among the team. As the season proceeded, with the crucial derbies of both Chelsea and Tottenham, you started to notice how it was having a negative effect on your girlfriend.

You grew up in Melbourne, Australia, playing for your local club before being scouted by recruits when you were in High School. You joined Melbourne Victory at Seventeen, playing alongside your future Matildas teammates, Kyra and Courtney. The three of you went to school together, before graduating and parting ways. While they moved to the Sweden league, you chose to head to Bayern Munich, where you spent four years strengthening your skills and gaining wider international attention.

The move was incredibly difficult. You did not understand a word of German walking into your first day, and still struggle to communicate in the foreign language. It definitely helped when Lioness player, Georgia Stanway transferred from Manchester City, and you ended up spending a lot of time with the English girl.

Due to this connection, you had met the other Lionesses by association, one girl sticking out to you specifically.

You had properly met Alessia in a friendly match against your two National teams. It hadn't taken long for you to realise your feelings for each other, but the timing never seemed right. She was in Manchester, playing for United, and you were in Germany, both consistent in your hard work for your respective teams.

You both were called up for the World Cup squad, you playing as a regular starter in the Midfield. From your early career, you always had a deep-rooted chemistry with Kyra and Courtney, so the opportunities the three of you created set the scene for your forwards up front. It was heartbreaking losing to England in the Semi-finals, especially in a home World Cup. You remember how Georgia sat with you after the game, waiting until she knew you were okay before she went off to celebrate.

You reciprocated the kindness by watching the final, feeling upset for the Lionesses when the score did not turn out their way. The two of you wondered what the next step was for you.

You had trouble mulling over the end of your contract, knowing Georgia had just renewed hers. After the World Cup, the recognition of the public had a great turnout, and your agent was met with many expressions of interest.

When Arsenal's name popped up on that list, you knew it was a no-brainer.

You and Alessia had both transferred in the same week, Kyra a few weeks later. The blonde and you moved in together, having both no place to live and hit it off from there. Now, a few months in, you've never been happier.

"Alright girls, we can do this." You heard Kim shout from beside you. Alessia was holding your waist, fiddling with the hem of your shorts as the team huddled around each other.

"Go out and set the scene. First tackles, first corners, everything, alright?"

You were versing Chelsea, the London Derby, in a sold-out Emirates, and you could feel the nerves radiating off Kyra from in front of you. Kim was the Captain today, her Scottish accent shouting as both the starting eleven and subs hugged one another. The lead-up to this game was beyond stressful, the pressure of starting in such a critical game building on Alessia and you over the past few days. The whole ordeal was daunting, having not ever played in a derby of this significance before.

"London is Red, girls, let's go!" Katie shouted, earning the huddle to disperse as everyone took their starting positions.

You could feel the sweat compile over the creases in your hands, wiping them twice over before jogging to your place on the wing. You found yourself looking out to the crowd, waving at the group of fans chanting your name. Erin Cuthbert was quick to join your side, standing close by as the cheers grew louder in anticipation.

Alessia was upfront, watching you with adoring eyes. You offered her a tight-lipped smile, pursing your lips and blushing when she sent a toothy grin and thumbs up your way. However; the moment was short-lived as the referee was quick to blow her whistle, commencing the game.

It was apparent that Chelsea was not expecting the energy Arsenal brought to the game. Errors and miscalculated passes were being carried out left and right, the chemistry between both sides slipping beneath the heightening apprehension.

“I'm here!” You called, speeding along the wing as Katie hesitated on the other side of the pitch. The Chelsea girls had left your front wing open, crowding in the midfield, evidently oblivious to the mistake they’d produced. You heard Emma Hayes yelling to cover your end, but Katie had already seen you, crossing the ball to your end. Cuthbert was on your tail, trying hard to stub your sprint in an attempt to stuff you up.

Victoria was to your right, onside yet swarmed with about three defenders. Beth was not far behind; Chelsea defenders were swarming the box in a desperate endeavour to clear Arsenal’s attempt.

You had no other choice but to nimble the ball through Fleming’s legs and towards Vic, who helplessly maneuvered the ball through the maze of defenders before passing to Mead. Cuthbert had put her hands behind her back, using her body to shield Beth’s fake attempt at the goal. You watched with your breath hitched as Beth powered the ball to the goal, observing the swift motion of the back of the neck.

Alessia was the first to wrap your arms around you, holding you up, carrying you over to where Katie was gripping Beth for dear life.

The rest of your team celebrated around you, screaming among the thousands of people in the crowds, smiles etched on all your faces.

“You’re doing so well.” Less yelled, hoping you’d hear her praise over the booming echo of cheers circling the Emirates. She knew you heard her from the blush that spread your cheeks, making your already flushed face all the more flustered. Your girlfriend wrapped her hands around you, swaying you from side to side one more time before you patted her back and let go.

Her eyes watched your figure jog back to your spot near Cuthbert, who pushed her way into your shoulder before the whistle for the restart blew. You tried your best to ignore her antics, using your legs to propel you towards the ball.

Turns out, Chelsea didn't like what you just did.

Erin followed you up and down the pitch, tugging your shirt everywhere she went. Whenever you tried to run forward and make a chance for your team, the Scottish woman would yank you back, locking her arm around your body, keeping you glued to the sideline.

Chelsea evened the score only a couple of minutes later. The sweat dripping down your forehead was enough to tell anyone how hard you were trying. Erin wasn't the only one giving you grief; Fleming was always a few metres away, darting through the midfield easily without you to worry about.

You were finally given the ball from a cross from Victoria, who mustn't have realised how cornered you were. You hadn't left the sideline in twenty minutes now. Fleming was now to your left, running up against you with Erin’s arm holding your waist. You struggled to keep the ball at your feet, the crowd watching in delight as the three of you battled it out alone.

You had managed to dart the ball between Jessie’s legs, causing an audible reaction from the fans, but it seemed that your face was too preoccupied with meeting the grass to soak up any type of honour you were receiving.

You felt the ground against your cheek, your body falling from stubs to the foot. You groaned at the instant pain up your leg, causing you to hold your shoe and roll onto your back. The adrenaline from the game made the pang bearable, but you knew the tackle was far from clean way before the whistle had blown.

“Oh, get up. What a fucking baby.” You heard Erin say, her Scottish accent full of malice.

“I didn't know Chelsea hired my Nephew.” An Irish accent quipped nearby. “Cause all he does is throw a tantrum when he doesn't get what he wants.”

“It was clean.”

“Oh, fuck off, you slimy t—”

You didn't get to hear the rest of their dispute, too busy nursing your foot with your hands. Steph had broken the two up, ordering Katie to run back to the other side. Sam Kerr was also around, kneeling beside you amidst the strain.

“You ‘right, mate?” Your Aussie Teammate helped you up, holding out her hands and rubbing your back as you regained balance. The Skipper had been your mentor since you joined the Tillies. The older woman was an idol of yours, and you looked up to her despite the few years between you.

However, you couldn't respond to Sam in time, for she was pushed away harshly by a certain blonde, her blue eyes reeling with anger at the sight of the tackle you endured.

“Stay away from her, Kerr.” She snarled, using her arm to support your weight onto one foot. You put your hand on her chest, shooting a silent apology to Sam, who shrugged nonchalantly before sauntering off.

“Y/N, are you alright?” The referee asked the yellow card still in her hand. You knew you had the power to play it over the top, but this game was everything to you. You didn't want to be subbed off any time soon.

But your girlfriend wasn't having any of it.

“She,” Less pointed to Erin, who was standing by a regretful Fleming. “Needs to be sent off for that. She's been harassing Y/N all game. It was obviously on purpose. Did you see it? It was stubs to the—”

“Lessi, stop, it's alright. I'm fine.” You swapped glances from your girlfriend to the Ref, who was still looking at you for reassurance in regard to your physical wellness. “I’m fine.” You repeated, and the whistle was quickly blown for a free kick, and a yellow toward Cuthbert.

Alessia looked down at you cautiously, eyeing your leg and the slight weariness in your step. “Are you sure?” She asked.

When you nodded, she jogged over to her position once more, sighing at your stubbornness as you prepared for your kick.

Ilestedt’s goal only a few minutes later sent all of the girls into a frenzy. You sprinted over to the Swedish player, jumping onto her back and kissing her head, laughing as you felt the rest of your team surround you in hugs and celebrations. The screams and cheers in the stands were phenomenal. No one expected the Reds to be beating the Blues so early into the game.

Erin was hot on your tail when Caitlin punted the ball towards you. You made the sprint down the line, your Aussie teammates Steph and Caitlin both yelling out for a pass. You were about to boot it behind you, where Steph was waiting for the assist when you felt your legs give out for the second time that game. The grass met your face, the power of the fall leaving you in shambles, the ball long forgotten by the time your hand shot up to the blood running down your nose.

Steph was by your side, forgetting all about the game still in play. Alessia had gained possession of the ball, holding it in her hands by the time you had sat up, the whistling blowing when the Ref noticed the amount of red spilling down your shirt.

“Move your hand.” Steph uttered, holding your face and using her own shirt to hold your nose. “It’s not broken.” You did as you were told, your nose warm at the contact of the ground, only slightly sore. She looked up to Kim, who you knew was fuming underneath her worried gaze.

“I don't want to be subbed off.” You said, and you saw Kim nod, agreeing before storming up to the Referee, who was talking sternly to Erin.

Beside her was Alessia, with her arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed into a furious knot, you watching in horror as a yellow card was shown her way. Katie had made it just in time to take her away, gripping the girl’s shoulders and guiding her towards you.

The medics had come on to see to your nose whilst handing you another shirt to change into. They assessed the blood, which was slowly halting, and declared that you had just knocked it. You told them you didn't want to go off, and with a nod from Katie and approval from the Referee, you stood off the field patiently before you were allowed back on.

During those painstaking moments, you pondered on what Alessia had said that made her get the yellow. You knew Erin was already on thin ice, and in yesterday’s training, Jonas had said that if given the chance, Alessia was to take the penalties. You knew the English girl. She was never much of a violent person on the field, choosing to stay calm and collected rather than angsty and irate when something didn't go her way.

But in games like this, where everything was on the line, it was hard to deny the apparent tension behind her actions. When it came to you, she’d sacrifice everything. For you, she’d take a million yellows if it meant sticking up for you.

You had sprinted up near Fleming when the girls ran towards your goal. The stadium stood in anticipation, the adrenaline of Arsenal’s streak pumping through their cheers. Alessia found the ball under her feet, her shot hitting the back of the net with a swish. You couldn't hear anyone but yourself, the pain and exhaustion from the half leaving your body the very moment you wrapped your legs around Less’s waist.

The girl held you up with her hands, holding under your thighs, squishing the skin just under your arse before putting you down. You laughed at her cheeky grin, relishing the private moment between the two of you before the rest of the girls stampede their way around you.

“LESSI RUSSO!” Beth screamed, hugging the two of you as she jumped in excitement. Arsenal were beating Chelsea — the top of the ladder — three-one going into the second half. If they scored once more, it’d be the Blue’s worst defeat in five years.

The thought was the utmost motivation.

You would be lying if you said you weren't surprised to find yourself walking back on in the second half. Your nose had stopped bleeding during half-time, but the ache was still attending when you made your way to the wing.

Just before you went out, you felt familiar hands grip your waist, pushing you against the wall of your cubby. You saw Alessia’s glare eye your kit and the way she licked her lips at the sight of your flushed countenance. Her starved eyes roamed your face. Your lips met hers in a hungry kiss, knowing the rest of the girls were in their own world as they prepared for what was to come.

“You’re playing really good.” You said, holding her biceps, your finger drawing circles against her skin.

Alessia hummed, meeting your lips again, nipping your bottom lip before pulling away. “So are you, baby. ‘Making me so proud, you are.”

The compliment went straight through you. Her eyes continued to linger on you as you walked back out onto the pitch. You swallowed any pre-existing desire you had for the girl as Jessie Fleming walked by your side, offering you a curt, determined smile, then going stone-faced.

The rivalry in the second half displayed by both sides was nothing in comparison to the anger radiating in the last forty-five minutes of the London Derby.

Katie and Caitlin both got cards in two minutes of each other. Lauren James, Chelsea forward, fifteen minutes later. Illegal tackles were thrown left and right, pushing, shoving, ploughing everywhere you looked.

Emma Hayes must've thought Erin would've been sent off if been marking you for another second. Jessie was a much cleaner opponent, but as the time ticked over, the end of the match and the taste of victory near, the Canadian found haste in her decisions, making a rather late decision in tackling you near the sideline.

“Fuck, sorry.” She spoke, and while remorseful, she seemed too engulfed in the loss to speak much truth. She took her yellow graciously but made no attempt to reconcile with you. She walked over to Sam, who gave her a scornful glare, making the younger girl cower. You took your time getting up off the grass, stretching out the tension in your hamstrings before straightening back onto your feet.

On her way over to you, Alessia shot the dirtiest glare she could muster towards Fleming, not realising that many fans would catch the interaction on their phones. She made her way over to you, kissing the top of your forehead, making no endeavour to hide her public affection towards you.

Your relationship with Alessia was extremely private. You didn't want the public to know every detail of each other, and how you lived day to day in each other’s company, but that didn't mean you didn't like to tease your relationship over social media every once and a while. The Arsenal girls were all for a photo dump on Instagram, and many of the fans had caught onto your close proximity in some of the photos.

One of them in particular caused the rumours of your relationship to form. It was in Katie’s dump, a couple of weeks after your move to Arsenal. A group of girls were all sitting together in a booth, somewhere in a random London pub, but there wasn't enough room, leaving you to sit on Alessia’s lap when the photo was taken. From there, everyone assumed the two of you were dating, and while neither of you confirmed anything, it wasn't a secret you were trying hard to keep.

The game proceeded and not long after, an easy penalty was given to your side after a Chelsea defensive miscommunication. It was Alessia who took it, and the crowd made deafening sounds of joy as the Reds crowded around each other in celebration.

You were beating Chelsea 4-1.

The feeling was euphoric. Nothing could beat the sour, everlasting annoyance planted on Cuthbert’s face. Nothing could take you away from the overwhelming happiness that overtook your body when the full-time whistle blew, leaving Arsenal in glee at the massive takedown on the reigning top-of-the-ladder.

Alessia was up against you the moment you met each other’s glance. She pulled you off the ground, spinning you around in circles, making you squirm and squeal as she tickled your sides.

“You did so well, baby.” She sounded, her breath tickling your ear. You shivered, trying hard to hold in your yearning. Alessia knew how to rile you up, hands coming up to glue to your shoulders, massaging the knots that had formed from the tiresome run you just had. You groaned at the relief. Alessia smirked at the whines coming from your mouth.

“All for me, baby?”

You hid your face in her chest at that, face red at her undistinguished connotations. She laughed, holding your chin, placing a quick peck on the side of your lips, pulling you back into her afterwards.

You waited until she was soaking up the silence, a small smile decorating your sweaty face.

“Did it all for you, Lessi.”

____________________________

#arsenal wfc #caitlin foord #arsenal #beth mead #chelsea #chelsea women #jessie fleming #katie mccabe #katie mccabe x reader #kyra cooney cross #erin cuthbert #sam kerr #millie bright #emma hayes #auswnt #lionesses #kim little #alessia russo #alessia russo x reader #alessia russo x y/n #laia codina #vivianne miedema #championsleague #barclays wsl #wsl 23/24

[leah-lover]

Get better. Alessia Russo × pregnant reader.

Alessia introduces her pregnant girlfriend to the team after the conti cup win.

Words: 1k

You woke up to the sound of rain, and the smell of coffee, but this wasn't your favorite way to wake up because Alessia wasn't there with you. You lazily opened your eyes to a tray with your breakfast on it with a note next to it that said “ good morning beautiful. I love you.”

Since Alessia started dating it was obvious that she was a hopeless romantic. She wanted to protect you, care for you and love you to the best of her ability.as a result, you kept your relationship private since she was getting a lot of hate after leaving man united for you. Your job had nothing to do with football. One day you and Alessia met at a bar while she was celebrating her birthday. The sparks went on immediately and you never left each other after that.

You were originally living in Manchester with her but your work had required you to go live in London , the north to be exact. Upon hearing the news, Alessia decided it was also time to leave her club.

Now you wake up in your shared home in London, have breakfast in bed, then get up to get ready. Alessia had early Training that day and you didn't have work you only had a doctor's appointment.

After getting ready you went to your appointment where the doctor confirmed to you that your baby was in very good health. You ask him for a moment alone with the baby monitor and you call your girlfriend.

“ Hello baby I miss you. Well, we miss you.” You started the conversation by pointing the camera towards the baby monitor. “ Ohh hi baby, oh my God I wish I was their baby. Is everything ok?.” She said with the biggest smile on her face.

“ Yeah it's all okay. I am going to read on the road after this. We want to be with you when you win the cup.” I responded by sipping the gell of my belly.

“ Amor please be careful, besides I am sick I might not even play.” She said,

“ Yeah I know this sickness stopped you from sleeping next to me for a while now. I really miss you and the baby misses your cuddles with me.” I cooked.

“ You wouldn't have to wait much longer. I am getting better. Amor I gotta go I love you tho.” She added blowing a kiss at the camera.

“We love you too.” I said blowing a kiss back.

I got to the stadium at the right time before kick off. Alessia got me the closest seats to the pitch and to the Arsenal fans. The atmosphere was electric when the teams got in. The chants, the tension, and the even score all managed to overwhelm me so I found myself holding on to my bump more than usual. I was sat next to a few Arsenal supporters who managed to all cheer me up again.

Suddenly an uproar filled the stadium, we had won the cup due to Stina’s goal. My happiness overwhelmed me. I was happy for the team and proud of Alessia who played really well despite her illness. I was celebrating with the fans around me when i spotted alessia heading my way not joining her team’s celebration.

“ baby i am fucking proud of you i love you soo soo much.” I yelled as soon as I saw her and hugged her.

“ Hey, mind your language in front of my baby.” she said joinkinly which earned her a pout from me.

“ you should go celebrate with the girls you earn it star girl, you and me can celebrate when i get home.” I added my hands on her shoulder.

“ I don't want to celebrate with them, I want to celebrate with you plus I am not going to drive all the way to London alone again.” she said with the cutest pouty bossy face. Before I had any chance to respond she added. “ Come with me. It's time to introduce you to the team.”

Shocked, I said “ Lesi I don't do anything you are not comfortable with, you are high on adrenaline baby.”

She didn't mind anything I said, she took my hand and slapped passed security and she led me to the changing room.

The music was loud, everybody was dancing, eating pizza, hugging, and taking pictures. I felt so out of place so I tried to stop Lessi but with no luck. Nobody saw us come in, we went undetected until she shut the music off, which earned her a glare from all the team.

“ i know, I know but I wanted to share with you something very important. '' she apologized for the music. '' This beautiful young woman next to me is my girlfriend. She and I have been dating since I was at United and she is now pregnant with our first child. That's it you can now go back to celebrating.” she said and turned the music back on. All of the team’s jaws were on the floor. Leah shut the music off again and said “ you mean to tell us that you are in a secret relationship and you are going to have a secret child why didn't you tell us dumbass.”

“ What Leah here means to say is that you two are welcome. We love you already and we love you baby too right Leah.” said Kim the captain which Leah nodded to.

The encounter was wholesome, I felt welcomed by the girls who wanted to learn everything about us. That night was filled with stories, jokes and laughter.

After we were done celebrating I got on the bus with them and sat next to alessia.

“ I don't want to go home and cuddle with you so that I can get better.” she said her hands on my bump and her head on my shoulder which earned her a kiss on her head.

“ I love you baby and I am so proud of you. x

#alessia russo #alessia russo × reader #woso #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso community #woso couples #pregnant reader #leah williamson #awfc x reader #awfc imagine #awfc #kim little

[lw6-woso]

coping mechanism (Leah Williamson x reader)

OCD, it was something. when you first joined the Arsenal squad in 2018 the girls took notice quickly that you were some one of a clean an organising freak. the first time they really noticed was when they walked into your apartment for a team bonding night. everything was highly organised, you books you food and everything was perfectly clean like it was really impressive.

so when you and Leah moved in together, Leah got first hand of the struggles of our OCD and not just been organised and neat. the anxiety, the mood swings all the bad things Leah has witnessed.

it was a normal day and you both had just gotten back from training, you both showered and Leah went to do some work in the office whilst you were doing some organisation in the kitchen since it was getting on your last nerve. you were currently taking out everything from the cupboards and cleaning the cupboards, the things in the cupboards and then organising everything.

Leah had walked in half way through you being in your moment, and signed knowing that you were getting bad, that's what the girls like to call it it was stages, you would clean simple for example hoover and polish, you would clean excessively like lamps and do a real spring clean and then you would slowly get worse with organising closets, clothes and then going through the house and organising every part of the house over and over again. during these stages your wellbeing would get worse with your mood changes, sleep it would all get worse. worse was a key word in this situation.

Leah always struggled with this sort of things, never knowing the triggers as you didn't even know, it just happened.

"hey baby what you doing" she asked leaning on the door frame.

"this kitchen has been bothering me for a while" i said finishing off another cupboard.

"okay so what do you want for tea tonight" she said not knowing if the kitchen will be in cooking conditions tonight.

"takeout" you said almost instantly.

"okay what food you thinking" She said.

"i don't know I'm not that hungry you can choose love" you said to her and she nodded leaving you to it. Leah walked back into the office and ordered food and and asked Kim for some advise.

you were really getting along with the Kitchen finishing all the cupboards and sweeping and mopping before leaving the kitchen. you were walking towards the office still feeling awful you couldn't even describe the deep feeling you had within you. walking into the office you sat next to Leah fidgeting about.

"come on" Leah said getting up and grabbing your hand.

"what" you asked.

"we are going for a drive" she said as you walked out of the house. you didn't question what she was doing. you just let Leah drive off.

"what about food" you asked.

"we will pick it up" She said, and you did just that you picked up the food and continued to drive and drive hoping it'll clear your head. Leah parked up in front of the sunset, you sat there in silence not knowing what to say.

"what caused it" she said and you knew exactly what she was going on about and you knew the answer.

"my therapist suggested to change my prescription" you said.

"oh love, why didn't say anything" she said.

"i don't know i just thought id be fine" you said.

"so how do you feel about it all" she asked.

"in my gut i think its good idea like i haven't had to many slips and I'm progressing with everything but in my mind i think that if it change everything its just going to get worse and ill end up like i did after covid and i cant do that again" you said.

during and after covid was awful for you the germs and the news go to you and to summaries it all you refused to play football and when you did start to come back to training you went through a breakdown and you didn't come to training or play for almost a month.

"you won't because you have a strong support system and i think personally i think that you should try to change your dose so then if it doesn't work then you really know where you are and if you are improving and if it does work then your getting there its a long process as you know" she said.

"yeah" you said.

"one step at a time" she said and you looked at her and kissed her.

"i love you" you said to her.

"i love you more" she said back.

"not possible" you said to her kissing her again.

"right lets get home I'm shattered" Leah said and you agreed it had been a long day.

you both went home and straight to bed. over the next couple of weeks you agreed to change your dose and it had been the best decision you had made during the journey, you felt more free. you obviously had your moments with cleaning, that will never change as you were always a clean person before your diagnosis, but Leah was right with having a strong supportive system all the girls were rocks, and Leah especially having her to come home to made life so much easier.

#women football #woso community #woso imagine #engwnt #awfc #leah williamson #leah williamson imagine #leah williamson x you #leah williamson x reader #ocd #organisation #angst with a happy ending #fluff #woso fanfics #woso #woso x reader #arsenal women #arsenal #arsenal wfc #kim little #lionesses #england lionesses #england women

[northlondonforever]

THERE SHE ISSSSS

#arsenal wfc #alessia russo #woso #leah williamson #beth mead #katie mccabe #caitlin foord #kim little #kyra cooney cross #jen beattie #millie turner #ella toone #lionesses

[midnight-ramblingswfc]

Arsenal women wins the continental cup 2024!!

#arsenal wfc #arsenal women #kim little #leah williamson #woso #barclays wsl

[carolineshairtie]

Leah: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as "Eagle One".

Leah: Alessia, code name... "Been There, Done That".

Leah: Lia is "Currently Doing That".

Leah: Katie is "It Happened Once in a Dream".

Leah: Jonas, code name... "If We Were The Last People On Earth".

Leah: Kim is... "Eagle Two".

Kim: Oh, thank fuck.

#awfc #woso #woso community #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso incorrect #woso incorrect quotes #woso soccer #kim little #leah williamson #lionesses

[mccardswife]

You are enough

heyy! this is my first one shot so it is not the best but feel free to give any tips!

arsenal wfc x teen!reader

warnings: mentions of violence, bruise, angst, sh, a few cuss words, suicidal thoughts, protective awfc and fluff in the end. Please remind me if I have forgotten some! (don't read if you get triggered)

(not proofread so if any mistakes give me a heads up)

word count: 2144

enjoy!

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Being a 16 year old professional football player is not the easiest thing in the world. Yes, you do what you love everyday but it has its up and downs. I signed for arsenal 3 months ago but I had no idea it would be that difficult. I don't feel like I belong here, all the girls on the team are truly amazing don't get me wrong, but it is so hard living up to the standards. Especially when I am me, just me and only me. I don't feel enough

After my alarm went signaling me to get ready for another day of training, the thought of going to training today dreaded me, and it has for weeks. Silence, I lay in my bed in silence just thinking of all the bad things that can happen today. If you are wondering where my parents are, the truth is. I live alone, yes, alone as a 16 year old in England. My parents has never supported me playing footy, not even when I was little. They wanted me to have a career that was meant for "girls" and not "boys", but that sounded bizarre. Football is for everyone, but they don't seem get that into their head. My parents kicked me out when they found out I signed for Arsenal, we lived in London, but since I got kicked out I had to get an apartment for myself. It was pretty hard but my best friend helped me and I am so grateful thankful for her. I have not told the team about me living alone for 6 months, they would go all protective and wanting to know why but I can't tell them, not yet. I don't want to be judged. Saying to the girls that I got kicked out of home, even thinking about it makes me feel so embarrassed and ashamed of myself.

I lay in bed, in pain. Physically and emotionally. Last night, after I was out grocery shopping I took the metro home as always, when a man probably doubled my age walked over to me. I then realized that it was my father, he dragged me into a corner and asked me if I still was into all that "football shit". I got furious and started whisper shout at him, turned out that was not the best idea. He started going about me being a disgrace to the family, not only the family but the world, that no one is ever going to love me for playing football, and then he punched me right in my cheek. I felt thrilling pain in my face, but he grabbed my wrists hard and said in my face "You useless bitch, no one cares about you and never will".

That sentence goes through my mind over and over again. I was almost impossible to fall asleep last night, because of the pain I was in both physically and emotionally. What my father told me, got to my head and I was thinking. Maybe he was right, I am a disgrace, no one will ever love me, maybe if it would be better if I just disappeared.

Well, well. Got to get up for training and stop thinking. Seriously y/n, get your shit together...

I walked downstairs to the bathroom and got dressed and tried to cover the bruise on my cheek that now has gotten all blue, yellow and purple. It was really painful and very difficult but totally worth it when I was done and I literally could not see a damn thing. Then I did the same to the bruises on my wrists and after I tried to cover up the dark bags under my eyes but that was a bit more of a job.

Suddenly I got the urge, the painful urge. I took the hidden blade from the mirror cabinet and drawed lines on my right arm. One, two, three, four.

Then I looked at the clock. Shit, I thought. The training starts in two hours and we have breakfast together in the dining room an hour before. The metro usually took 30 minutes, I packed my bag in a hurry and left.

When I walked in to the facility I heard two voices yelling my name behind me. Lotte and Alessia walked quickly over to me. "You excited for training?" Alessia asked you. "Yes totally" I said in a lie, I think they saw that I lied because it did not look like they believed me at all. "What about you Less and Lotte?" you said to try getting the attention away from you. It seemed that it worked because they said in sync "Yes". Less and Lotte looked at each other and we giggled.

When we walked in to the dining room, everyone was there. I tried to brush off all the looks I got. Why does everyone look so suspicious today...

"Come here Y/n, sit with us", Leah said after I served myself food. Leah sat with Katie, Kim, Lia, Caitlin, Steph, Beth, Viv and Kyra. I walked nervously over to them and sat down in the seat beside Beth. They started talking and I just sat there quietly eating my food being in my thoughts until Viv said "Y/n, you've been quiet, are you good". They looked at me concerned, "Me? Yes of course Im good, just sat thinking about the upcoming training today". I lied straight through my teeth. "Okay, if you're sure. but you can talk to us though", Caitlin said. I just said a quietly thank you, and then we walked to the locker room and got ready for training.

We started doing some light jog then got into some training drills. I was already sweating, it was surprisingly very sunny outside today and I wore a long sleeve training jersey because of my scars. "Aren't you hot in that", said Jen to me. I just simply shrugged her off saying no.

I was so exhausted, my body is so tired and I really want to lay down. When we had water break I just laid down on the grass. Sweating, I rubbed my face because I was so tired.

Beth and Viv walked over worriedly, they have become my unofficial parents after my transfer to Arsenal. They looked shocked when they saw me. "What" I said in a panicked voice. "Why do you have a big black bruise on your cheek?" Beth said, "And on your wrists?" Viv said. "Is something going on at home?" Viv asked with a knowing look. "No, no of course not, why would you assume that".

After training everyone looked worried and concerned, my passes and shots got sloppier and sloppier, I was hurting more and more. When I was about to leave, Kim, Katie, Leah and Jen cornered me. With Beth and Viv looking guilty behind. They brought me into a private room and they started telling me what Beth and Viv told me. Then all of a sudden Kim said "You know, all the team has been worried and concerned for a while, I can't remember how many times the girls have repeatedly come and talked to me". I looked at her ashamed. "Why do you have bruised?" Katie asked, "I just fell" I said, the lie obvious.

I started scratching because my scars got really itchy, I really wanted to just disappear right there and then. Then Leah grabbed my right wrist softly and pulled up my sleeve, the last thing before I broke down was gasps from the girls. I started trying to make up excuses but none of them were having it, "come with us" said Beth, "We will bring you to the medical room and then we want you to tell us everything". I desperately did not want to but I knew it was no chance of me getting out of this.

When we got to the medical room they put me on one of the beds. My scars were infected, that is why they itched so damn much. Jen was cleaning up my bruises while Kim cleaned up my scars. I know the people who worked here could do it but I did not want them right now, it is bad enough that now the whole team knows.

Leah then said in her stern but soft captain voice "Now tell us everything". I tried to tell her that it was nothing. What Katie said broke me "Please babe, we only want to help you. We know it has been hard for you but please". Then I broke down again, full on shaking and crying. Desperately gasping for air.

I started telling them everything, how my parents are and that they has never supported me once for the choices I have made, that I don't feel like I belong here because I am only me... When I spit out the truth about me living alone for 3 months because my parents kicked me out and that they were abusing me for years before, I saw tears in all of the girls faces. It was a heartbreaking sight. I told them how I ran into my father last night and what he did and said to me and I started sobbing again and saying silently to myself "It is true, what he said. I am a reckless disgrace full kid".

"You are enough y/nn, I promise you babe" Viv said. All of the others agree but I could not help believing my fathers words. "Actually me and Beth have been thinking for a while, we have a spare room and big enough place for 3, and you are like our kid. I am being for real, we love you as our own family. All the team does, but we wondered if you wanted to come live with us?" Viv asked me. I was hesitant and I think Beth saw that because she said "We are not taking no for an answer". I felt a smile creep up on my face and as desperate I was trying to hide it all the others saw and started smiling too. I said to Meadema, "thank you moms". I realized what I said "shit fuck, sorry I did not mean to".

"Y/nn it is okay, you have no idea how glad that made us, you are like our kid" Beth and Viv said.

After a while of me telling them about my thoughts, how I have been feeling for the last weeks, they decided to get me into therapy. We have a therapist at the facility so we agreed to be going to her twice a week. "I am grateful for all of you, I really am but I just feel like a bother" I said quietly.

"No babe stop" Jen said, Katie walked over to me, she took her hands on my head and said "You are enough, a hundred times enough". "You are like a younger sister to me, it breaks me to see you like this, not only me but all of us. We and all the team loves you. You are the baby of the team."

"We will always protect you, and we will get your so called parents locked up." Kim said to me. "Not Viv and Beth but the other parents" Jen said in a playful tone.

"That I understand" I said with a smile of my face.

Leah asked me if she could tell the other girls and the Gaffer, she needed to anyway but it was nice she asked me. I said yes then she walked outside.

A few minutes later they all came in. Kyra, being kind of like my annoying twin ran over to me and hanged on for me for dear life in a bear hug. I started explaining to them a bit more, and reassured them that it was not their fault but my manipulative parents.

I also said that I called Viv and Beth mum and that I am moving in with them and Lessi and Laura said at the same time "about damn time". All the team broke out in laughter.

"I am sorry for not telling you but I feel a thousand times better now after telling you, I have been scared and not felt at home here for a while but telling you and knowing that I can count on you girls will help me. The whole team is kind of like my family I never got and I can't ask for more than that. I am so grateful for all of you, and I love you"

"We love you too y/nn", Leah said with the softest most heartwarming smile ever. "You are our family, blood or not you will always be family" Kim said reassuring.

"Always," Katie said

"And you are enough" the team said lovingly.

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