#more than his need to cling to a rigid identity for the sake of toxic masculinity

[nonegenderleftpain]

So I see so many people coddling cis people's feelings about their partners transitioning, and I'm normally very polite about it because attraction is complicated. But honestly, cis people?

Do better.

My partner is the straightest fucking cis man I have ever met in my life. When I came out, it was very hard for him. But I did not know that at first, because he did not make it my problem. He dealt with the initial shock on his own, rather than push it on me when I was most vulnerable, and then later, we worked through it as a team. Because he loves me and our relationship is important to him. He's not attracted to men. At all. Repulsed, actually. But he is still with me, and is attracted to *me.* I have a full fucking beard and ass hair, and we have made it work.

Normally I would add a "I know it can't work for everyone and that's okay" disclaimer, but I'm not doing that today. Do better. Do better for your partners, who you say you love so much. Put your money where your mouth is. If my autistic, laser straight partner can do it after he'd been with me as a woman for five years, so can you.

#this post brought to you by my partner driving across the city to rescue me when i was having a panic attack in a LIGHTNING STORM #because my phone had died and i didnt know how to get home and i knew if someone saw me in hysterics in my cab i could be in danger #because i look like a man now #and him sitting with me in the cab of my truck holding my hand with my head on his chest until i could breathe again #this man was being visibly gay in public #it doesn't matter that hes straight and our relationship is complicated by my gender identity #he was being visibly gay in public because he loves me more than he cares about how others view us #more than his need to cling to a rigid identity for the sake of toxic masculinity #more than his preference to be completely non-offensive and invisible in most situations #when he goes out alone he is invisible #when we go out together - him with the crippled tranny jew on his arm - he is the center of attention #and he does not hesitate to go out with me. to be seen with me. to love me openly. #so fucking do better or get the fuck out #gender stuff #trans