#no on told me life was gonna be this gay

[kuroo-hitsuji]

Thinking about how Diavolo planted an entire fucking tree, in his fucking hidden childhood hangout spot (protected from anything and everything else in the forest that may try to get to it, mind you, so that is just about the most well-protected tree in the entire devildom--), and of course made sure it grows some of the most Quality apples in hell... Exclusively because he wanted to show Lucifer Devildom apples. What the fuck. That is the gayest thing I've ever heard. And then you find this all out specifically because he turns your little apple picking date with him into Fawning-Over-Lucifer hour, I--

He's pining so fucking hard, man. They're literally so fucking gay. The fact that these two motherfuckers basically canonically have the longest slowburn in fucking History is eating me alive orz

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me nightbringer #obey me night bringer spoilers #obey me dialuci #y'all don't understand I'm so fucking ckxjgnxgjfxnxgjxgxgjcgj #the only reason they're not for real gay demon married is because they're dateables in an otome game and not every player likes sharing #it's ok boys i am All About Sharing-- #deadass Kuroo is over here when diavolo officially confesses (in og) like “that's great ily too but have you told lucifer that yet??” #“that i like you?” #“no idiot that you like HIM--” #Kuroo is poly asf and literally dating everyone ofc they're playing matchmaker on top of it #they're not gonna sit here having these two idiots pining over their head their whole life ajzjskndjzkd #thinking out loud #rambling in the tags #diavolo #lucifer #kuroo

[duskerot]

I CAN POST ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND NOW

#txt #ITS BEEN EIGHT MONTHS. THIS IS THE LONGEST IVE SHUT UP ABOUT SOMETHING IN MY WHOLE LIFE #RHHHHRHHBGHHHGHHHHHHHJDHFDJJDM #I CAN BE GAY IN MY GIRLBLOGS THIS IS GONNA GET 100X WORSE FOR YOU ALL BUT 100X BETTER FOR ME #for context we hadnt told our friends yet but now we have so i can post here .. world beautoful #hiii sterling if you see my post hi . hi. :)

[lyssified]

guys how tall are you

#bcs at the doctor's yesterday they told me i havent grown at all for 3 years #so i'm probably gonna be 5'2 for the rest of my life #until i start shrinking #anyway this is important for my perception of yall #also i feel like i know way too many short gays #where my tall gays at

[skenpiel]

anxious sweatHello eyes darting aruond

#mama came in asked why i was still up and if id eaten anything #she closed the door. i went 'ill go to bed soon though' (a fucking lie too) and she opened it and i repeated myself #which is where i fucked up because she immediately asked me if i was drunk #i just went what. no im not. i am Not and she went yes you are #she came up to me and smelled my breath and only then was she satisfied....... but only a little #she can see through me so easy because she Does Not Trust Me #if i hadnt told that lie to try and reassure her i woulda been fine. urghhrghghhh #and now shes gonna take me sleeping heavily as proof i DID drink which while true isnt something she needs 2 know about....... #fuck my stupid baka life and this gay earth #drunkposting #for blacklisting.......................................................... i forfogt at first so im going back and adding it now...........

[gilda-dent]

I keep seeing people saying like theyre seeing so much negativity/problematic takes since its pride month and it just reminds me of the post thats like “you created ur dash! U followed these ppl” like if u wanna delete fine but like??? U could just unfollow those ppl

#imma start unfollowing complainers #listen im gay and got my sunglasses on and am gonna kive my best life #i told my coworkers today happy pride month then told them they meeded to get me giffs everyday since i was doing all the queer heavy liftin #shawn says shit

[yeetlegay]

PLEASE I AM SO GLAD FOR WHOEVER STARTED THIS WLW TALK I LOVE HEARING EVERYONE'S STORIES.

But your tags about guys being no homo if they even live in the same city and girls completely not detecting shit even after kissing other girls so many times sum up my entire point of the last ask. And I totally agree with what you said about being influenced by society, it's so true, but I also wish more guys would feel free to be more at ease or relaxed and okay with physical touch around guys, also part of it coming from culture of when boys hugs it's seen as inappropriate. So many of my buddies would freeze up when I'd hug them or touch them (in non sexual context and ofc I'd always make sure they were ok with it) that it always makes me sad. I feel like they're awfully touch deprived because as close as they are to their friends, they rarely ever share a hug, let alone something more. What broke me the most was this one time I helped my friend wash his hair and shave his face bc he was injured and that boy just started crying… Later on we talked about it bc I thought I fucked up something, but he said he literally never felt so much at ease with someone and it just made him realise how much he likes casual platonic intimacy. And then us girls do things like that just a casual sleep-over thing that we do.

- Lestat

I AM ALWAYS HERE TO TALK ABOUT GAY SHIT LESTAT

Oh yeah, and that social conditioning works both ways! All the patriarchal bullshit men get inundated with from literal birth (blue blankets, onesies that say shit like “lady killer”), it’s no wonder a lot of men struggle to show affection, especially with each other. They have extremely few “safe” outlets for physical and emotional intimacy that won’t be perceived as emasculating or queer. There’s a ton of sociological research about this, but yeah, just bc the patriarchy and heteronormativity give cis men more power does not mean it gives them a good time!

#let men hug each other 2k22 #I joke about everything men do (having waists? wearing glasses?) being gay and I stand by it bc jokes are funny #but like I think men as a whole should just…be gayer #men not hugging for no homo reasons depresses me bc they too should get to enjoy the inherent homoeroticism of human contact #we should let everything be gay AND make gay okay so cishet men can touch each other without shame or fear #yeetle asks #why don’t queue stay #so no one told you life was gonna be this gay

[heavenisapackagedeal]

try not to get kicked out of school challenge extreme mode

#real life things #one semester in and i’m already on academic probation #if i fail one more class i’m gonna lose my scholarship #i would be disowned faster than if i told my dad ive had gay sex in their home #they keep sending me emails and it’s stressing me out

[natandacat]

Here is a promise that if this very prestigious university keeps telling me to just drop out since they can't do anything about covid, I am going to make so much noise about it that it will ruin the Dean's holidays :)

#i am coming for him i am going to use all of their mission statements and list of values to expose their hypocrisy #i am going to make them mad and uncomfortable #i know i wont win this battle realistically so its time to go with a bang #i shouldnt have to chose between my life and my education and yet here i am #i know what matters and what matters rn is that i make enough noise to create the tiniest doubt in peoples mind #will probably be for nothing. but at least i would have tried #yall got me into that very exclusive program for my brains and rhetoric skills :) mfs im gonna use them against you #i got yelled at and laughed at all weekend just for carrying a sign that said 'no covid measures=queer deaths' i am made of steel now #one gay guy got so mad at me he just started yelling fuck you at me. i am very lucid about the fact that people want us to go away #us the crips the people who are proof that the pandemic isnt over #i told people 'your right to party shouldnt be above my right to live' and people cheered... before going back to partying #i am extremely sober to the situation. but im gonna keep doing as much work as i can do

[southislandwren]

ALRIGHT I’m home now and I also called my mom and my dad was listening in too. Anyway my dad says that that line about going from there is him being like. Into the idea and not just agreeing to hanging out because I’m asking. And my friends were like WOOOHOOOOO but idk man I am so stressed out I don’t want to fuck this up 😭

edited to add (so i dont spam posts tonight) i think on saturday i'll wear my normal clothes and hat but i'll keep my hair down. hes seen me without a hat on briefly (via fieldtrips and wearing hardhats, and at work, but that's with my hair in a bun and a hairnet on) but hes never seen my hair like. Down. and i want saturday to be like subtly special. not like knock his socks off special but yknow. a little more vulnerable than jeans and a sweatshirt

#I mean you guys have literally been here since I was first like ohhhh #man idk. I like him and I want to see what happens #and I think I’ll stay in SD a little longer anyway because I really cannot go home. it’s so fucking noisy and smelly all the time #argghhhhhh. okay I’m going to eat dinner now #I love you tumblrinas #alright im back from dinner. anyway that thing about staying in SD is like if I DO end up in a relationship i dont want it to just end #and hes staying in SD. but unless i got a job at His Job we'd be commuting anyway #but 2 hours or whatever is better than 14 #anyway. im getting ahead of myself. but i just need a good reason to not go home #i just cant do it. i cant go home. #for one thing. its easier to deal with the grief if im not Right There looking at his food dishes every day #oogh also.... hes gonna have to hear about sam eventually. especially if we start dating. which will coincide with March pretty well #i dont know about that.... #i mean i told my friends tonight i was like 'i have so many secrets' and they were like you dont have to tell him EVERYTHING. #but idk i do feel like if im gonna trust someone enough to date them they should know my secrets #im so scared lol idk how people just do this shit #also what if hes a good little christian boy and hates gay people. IM a gay people. #okay anyway i NEED to study for repro like this is life or death. i need to pass repro #(life or death bc either me or dad will end me if i fail lmaooooo) #boy post

[adhdchilles]

iliad tumblr simulator

🦉 ithacasfavguy Follow

boss is asleep. currently on a quest to steal some wine

🦉 ithacasfavguy Follow

stop reblogging this i'm gonna get caught you fuckers

#/srs

(729 notes)

🌻 achilles Follow

hahaha it would be so funny if i got so deathly drunk my hot doctor boyfriend had to escort me to the infirmary and pin me down so i dont end up stabbing someone and holding me by the hair to force my chin up and make me drink medicine hahahahaha

#please #pleaseee #i am so gay rn

(2,486 notes)

🚬 menelaghh Follow

i miss my wife

(215 notes)

🦢 helen Follow

currently having the time of my life. everything is great. except my new husband. i hope he dies

#captive princess life

(8,632 notes)

🐌 patrokloss Follow

never thought id have to say this but please do not try to make homemade wine with random shit you find on the woods ?? a guy just died

#psa #medicine

(371 notes)

👤 hektoroftroy Follow

guys im gonna be honest the worst thing to ever happen in my life was my brother coming back

🐭 parisbutitsnotfrance Follow

:((

👤 hektoroftroy Follow

you are literally on my DNI. this is your fifth account. please go away

(420 notes)

💪 jaxajax Follow

why are all the animals coughing to death?

#is this normal #vets of tumblr answer me

(13 notes)

🦦 die-a-medes Follow

these trojans ain't shit 😂😂😂 we'll be winning this easy fr

🦦 die-a-medes Follow

girl help it's been ten years

(824 notes)

👁 cassssandra Follow

being haunted by visions can be very fun actually

#therapist told me to be positive #trying

(5 notes)

🐭 parisbutitsnotfrance Follow

hello

🐭 parisbutitsnotfrance Follow

stop telling me to kill myself???

(8,753 notes)

🌻 achilles Follow

i hope you nerds name men on men attraction after me when i die

#if this doesnt happen then what is the point

(10,942 notes)

#the iliad #greek mythology #patroclus #achilles #odysseus #menelaus #paris of troy #hector of troy #troy #iliad #trojan war #cassandra of troy #ajax the greater #helen of troy #helen of sparta #diomedes

[oxydiane]

we talk a lot about how sasuke and naruto are so crazy about each other but there’s never enough attention on how the rest of the naruto cast Also thinks they are two fucking lunatics. like we are not alone on this. you have jiraiya telling naruto he needs to not go and chase a mf who tried to snatch his heart out his ribcage and naruto is like no i’d rather be a fucking moron for the rest of my life honestly. you have naruto leaving a mission and saying sory i cannot stay i need to go home and wait for sasuke and the fucking platypus looks at him ???? like he even had me confused where are you goin g to wait? ? why are you saying that like sasuke is coming back the fuck did i miss??? you have the kage summit arc which is just a whole bucket of ice being dropped onto you because you come in and immediately get slapped in the face by naruto letting himself be beat up because he won’t tell them where sasuke is??? like he has any fucking idea where sasuke is. and sai tries to make him come to his senses like naruto??? naruto WHAT ARE U DOING. it’s so bad they need an intervention. right after that naruto faces the raikage and gets on his knees saying i know my almost boyfriend almost killed your brother but i promise it wasn’t on purpose he was just being silly please don’t put a bounty on his head a war will literally ensue. and like. there’s LAYERS to this. 1. even RAIKAGE is like BOY what are you doing. STAND UP. 2. at this point you can count the people who like sasuke on the fingers of one hand like WHO is gonna start a war over him… naruto out there moving a war against a whole country by himself over his bf ok you go girl i guess. after this it gets even worse like gaara has to go up to him and be like SASUKE DOWSNT CARE ABOUT YOU. HE DOES NOT WANT YOU. and naruto just slaps his hand away in front of his family like rude?????? ignoring anything it is hilariouuusssss and then sai is like sorry. sakura lied to you they are actually off to kill sasuke and naruto gets a panic attack so severe he passes out. like i am not joking it was so bad his friends tried to kill sasuke behind his back. and then naruto escapes bedriddenment (is that a word?) after passing out from his panic attack to run and make sure NOBODY kills sasuke. like he’s on a RUSH leaping those trees he’s a boy on a mission. then after he gets there he’s like kakashi DO NOT TOUCH HIM. they launch themselves at each other bla bla gay monologues did you see what was in my heart and then. and then naruto is like. wait sasuke. and sasuke waits like sorry that’s such a little thing but it’s so funny to me like sasuke was just acting a lil murderous crazy manic wtv but naruto told him to wait and he waits. ok good boyfriend. anyways moving on naruto is like do you get it sasuke. if we fight again we will BOTH DIE! (everybody gets a ?????? bubble) i am the only one who can shoulder all that hatred. i will CARRY THE BURDEN OF YOUR HATRED AND WE WILL DIE TOGETHER! and . absolutely Everybody in that room just goes ???????????? what the FUCK is he TALKING ABKHT. everybody except sasuke. sasuke smirks and he’s like sure. they just talked about dying together and meeting each other in a different life where they’ll be free of their burdens and they’re just Fine and all ok smiling at each other and everyone is so fucking confused. like the entire supporting cast is with us side eyeing sasuke and naruto and thinking what in the everloving FUCK is WRONG WITH YOU????????

#it’s 4 am again #and i am thinking about sasunaru again #soo talks #sasunaru #narusasu #sns #naruto #naruto shippuden #naruto shitpost #rant #naruto uzumaki #sasuke uchiha #pro sns

[idonthavetofuckme]

Why am I still awake

#Ari speaks #do y’all ever feel like you’ve pushed all of your friends away #and that they’re exhausted with you and your drama of a life #like I don’t mean my life is dramatic #I just feel like it’s constantly going to shit #and I’ve been trying to focus on the good parts but fuck me #I have cried every day this week #I cried so hard today I had a really bad migraine that even TWO extra strength migraine meds wouldn’t fully take it away #and on top of that thanksgiving is coming up and none of my family has told me anything so I’ve decided to house sit my friends cat #and I feel so fucking alone because my siblings know that I’m keeping something from them because I don’t share a lot of things with them #I’m sure they’ve all guessed I’m gay but I have so much trauma from them about this subject that I am so scared to come out #I would really like a good weighted blanket and to be in a cabin in the middle of nowhere #with no plans #just books #and food #and time to myself #but I also want friends to be there?? like I am social but I don’t want to always be social #I need breaks #okay I’m gonna try to sleep now

[bemtevis]

pls don't tell me my brother is gonna be a horrible person

#1. he follows a bunch of nft bro youtubers #2. he made some jokes abt gay men being basically women and lesbians being basically men #had a huge fight w my mom when I told them that was homophobic #she didn't let me talk to him nd he didn't wanna listen #3. now he's?? shit talking the left??? amd supporting capitalism???? #sir you are a baby sit the fuck down #IS THIS HOW ALPHA CHADS ARE BORN #IS HE GONNA DEFLECT ANY CRITICISM BY SAYING HIS LIFE IS HARD CUZ HIS PARENTS ARE DIVORCED #IS HE GONNA HATE WOMEN #WHAT DO I DO #pls be just a phase #also he has so many violent outbursts and my mom does little to nothing to stop it #I'm legit worried #I don't wanna not love him wth!! #sol rambles

[magnetic-rose]

if you loved episode 3 of tlou you really should listen to the official podcast with troy baker, craig mazin and neil druckmann because there’s SO much! here’s some of my favorite things said on the podcast:

- joel stacking rocks was to show that he missed and mourned tess. in that moment he was saying “i’m sorry, i blew it, i lost you.”

- in the beginning of the episode ellie told joel tess’ death wasn’t her fault but deep down she does feel like it was her fault.

- ellie admires joel because he protected her multiple times and as a child she has a desire for a parental figure to protect her.

- frank realized bill was gay pretty much as soon as he got out of the hole and saw how bill was looking at him. bill’s taking in how handsome frank is and “frank’s brain is incredibly attuned to that.” that’s why frank was smiling.

- frank realized bill was gay fast, but he realized he wanted bill when bill was playing the piano and singing linda ronstadt.

- it took them a while to find long long time by linda ronstadt but they always intended the song for bill to sing to be about a long love that was forever unrequited. “it was very important that the lyrics were someone saying ‘everyone tells me that it’s okay, that love will find me [...],’ no it doesn’t, no it’s not, and the person that i long for from afar - i’m gonna love them basically forever in the most unrequited manner.”

- it was important that frank immediately knew bill’s sexuality because frank SAW bill, because bill had completely buried his sexuality but frank saw through him.

- frank originally was trying to see what he could get out of bill (like a free lunch) but the more time they spent together, the more he went “oh, this is a beautiful person.”

- “there is two ways of loving things. frank wants to love outwards - he is sun, he is light. he wants to make things beautiful around him, he wants to care for bill, he wants to revitalize the streets so it’s not just this mausoleum bill lives in, and he wants to have friends. he wants to share what they have. and bill wants to put an electrified fence around them that is guarded by an additional layer of flame-throwing gas pipes and no one can show up ever because he must protect frank from the world... and as it turns out, both of those loved are required but one of those loves is likely to give you in trouble more than the other.”

- when frank put his finger on the furniture piece and saw how dusty it was, he realized what his purpose could be in bill’s life. bill can protect them, but frank can nurture their home.

- when bill apologizes to frank for growing old fast, it’s because he’s afraid of frank being left alone. “look at this beautiful man and the beautiful things that he does, and what is bill’s contribution? bill doesn’t grow strawberries. bill’s contribution is to keep frank alive. but bill is already afraid that he’s going to fail and that is a fear that joel has because he has that fear through experience [of losing his daughter.]“

- bill and joel understand each other and that they’re purpose is to protect others. they don’t care about their own lives.

- on their last day together, bill decided very early that he was going to die as well.

- the gun that ellie takes belonged to frank.

- that letter bill wrote reminded joel that he failed to protect both sarah and tess. the letter underscores for him that no matter how hard he tries, he can’t protect the people that he cares about. but now he has ellie to protect.

#tlou #the last of us #bill tlou #frank tlou #billfrank #joel miller #ellie williams #tess servopoulos

[yeetlegay]

ok but I kind of had the opposite experience? like I remember being like 14 and at a birthday party and we played something like truth or dare and this other girl was dared to kiss me and everyone was so chill about it and "it doesn't count lmao" while I had half a panic attack (3/4 in that friend group is queer now to though lmao)

Omg maybe that’s why 😂 the queer power of that friend group just gathering up their collective obliviousness to de-gay extremely gay shit

#yeetle asks #why don’t queue stay #making up a tag for these convos just in case not everyone wants to hear me and anons recounting our gay antics lol #we’ll call it #so no one told you life was gonna be this gay