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#not even enough to cover delivery fee & tip
kitsunerokko · 2 years
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you know how cats don’t want to go to the vet and will resist and whine and stress the hell out?
that’s me but the vet is grocery shopping
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deleuranavery49 · 1 month
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Trucking Factoring
The factoring company takes on the risk of the debt and handles all the billing and invoicing on the collections. You are not borrowing from anyone, taking out a mortgage, or putting yourself into any debt with factoring. Approval is given a lot faster than a financial institution since there are no contracts or money owed involved. One major tip for owner-operators in the market for a factoring company is to maintain an eye out for contracts that lock you in long-term. Shorter or longer contracts could be offered on a case-by-case basis, but when you’re provided a contract 2 years or longer, you should be given a valid reason or look for a shorter contract. Freight factoring can be finest described as trucking companies promoting their unpaid invoices for cash, permitting them to receives a commission for his or her work a lot quicker. trucking factoring companies You additionally won’t have to fret about being at home to gather physical checks in your load deliveries – as a substitute, you possibly can go for an ACH or wire switch to get entry to funds while on the highway. Given truckers spend a lot time away from residence, this is a distinctive perk. On high of that, there are a staggering variety of new trucking companies being shaped every year, and it may be challenging for them to get financing the old school way (i.e., from a bank). Factoring, in plenty of cases, is the only way they'll get enough money move to run for quite a lot of months. We perceive the pitfalls of the business and the hassles trucking companies should go through in order to receives a commission. That’s why we provide clear pricing – no month-to-month minimums or charge. The process is far less complicated and sooner than making use of for a loan from the bank. Stop ready for unpaid invoices, grow your small business by turning debtors into working capital. Next we’ll have a look at the types of factoring and the way non-payment might influence your small business. Perform a correct market examine and evaluation of trucker profiles that may be your potential shoppers. The enterprise profile of trucking companies and their customers are an important source of information that guides you in assessing the liabilities and challenges you would probably face. The factoring company follows up on invoice cost, even when clients pay late. The factoring company takes on the duty for collecting the invoice. Once it’s paid, the factor pays the freight business the balance minus a small fee. Transportation factoring is a funding method in which a freight enterprise sells its invoices at a reduction to a factoring company. It doesn’t matter when you earmarked that cash for something else; the lender gets their cut before the rest is covered. The factoring company can choose to display any shoppers for creditworthiness earlier than they purchase your invoice. They have the choice to say no those with a low credit score score or different characteristics they deem too risky. Shippers and brokers additionally supply free load boards worth visiting often. They embrace Atlantic Logistics, Brokered Loads, Buchanan Hauling and Rigging, Carroll Fulmer, Erwin Bros. Trucking, Forest Commodities, FST Logistics, Greenbush Logistics, Harte Hands, and JB Hunt.
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igot33fandoms · 1 year
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Top Tips for Choosing the Right Event Furniture Hire Provider
When selecting an event furniture hire provider, there are a few key factors to consider. First and foremost, you should evaluate the provider’s reputation, quality of furniture, and customer service. It’s important to ensure that the furniture provided meets your event’s needs and will look great for the duration of the event. Additionally, you should ask for references from past customers to ensure that the provider can be trusted to provide quality furniture. Additionally, you should ensure that the provider has a reliable delivery system and can provide furniture on time. Lastly, make sure to read any contracts carefully before signing, as well as check their insurance coverage and any additional fees associated with the event furniture hire. By following these tips, you can ensure that your event is a success.
Consider Your Event Style and Budget
When it comes to choosing an event furniture hire provider, it’s important to first consider your event’s style and budget. Think about the overall look and feel you want to achieve and determine what type of furniture and accessories best fit that style. From there, consider how much you’re willing to spend on the rentals. Do you have the budget to rent from a large, well-known provider, or are you looking for something more affordable? Having an idea of what you’re looking for and what you’re willing to spend will help you narrow down the list of providers to choose from. 
Research Providers and Read Reviews
Once you’ve determined your style and budget, it’s time to start researching potential event furniture hire providers. Look for providers in your area and read reviews from past customers. This will give you an idea of the quality of the furniture, the level of service they provide, and the overall experience you can expect. It’s also a good idea to ask friends and family if they have any recommendations. 
Look for Flexibility and Variety
When choosing an event furniture hire provider, look for one that offers a wide variety of options. Ideally, you want to be able to mix and match different pieces to create the perfect look and feel for your event. You should also look for a provider that offers flexibility in terms of rental periods. Being able to rent furniture for a few hours or a few days can help you get the perfect look without breaking the bank. 
Ask About Delivery, Set-Up, and Clean-Up
Once you’ve narrowed down your list of potential providers, it’s time to ask about delivery, set-up, and clean-up. Depending on the type and size of the furniture you’re renting, you may need to have it delivered and set-up by the provider. Ask about the cost of delivery and set-up, as well as any additional fees for cleaning up after the event. 
Investigate Insurance and Licensing
When choosing an event furniture hire provider, it’s important to make sure they’re properly insured and licensed. Ask for proof of both and make sure it covers the types of furniture you’re renting. This will help protect you in the event of any damage or injury during your event. 
Assess Your Space Requirements
Before making a final decision, it’s important to assess your space requirements. Measure the area where you plan to set up the furniture and make sure it’s large enough to accommodate the pieces you’re renting. If you’re not sure, ask the provider for their recommendations. 
Check the Quality of the Furniture
Quality is an important factor when choosing an event furniture hire provider. Make sure to ask about the quality of the furniture and ask to see photos or a sample before making a final decision. You want to make sure the furniture is in good condition and that it’s going to look good for your event. 
Look for Added Services and Benefits
Finally, look for providers that offer added services and benefits. Ask about discounts for bulk orders and long-term rentals, as well as any special offers or promotions. Some providers may even offer complimentary delivery and set-up, so it’s worth asking about. By taking the time to research and compare providers, you can find the right provider to provide the perfect furniture for your event.
Conclusion
Choosing the right event furniture hire provider is essential to ensure that your event runs smoothly. By following the top tips outlined above, you can ensure that you find a reliable and experienced provider that will provide you with the best furniture and services at a reasonable price. You should carefully consider the quality of the furniture, the range of services offered, and the overall reputation of the provider before making a decision. With the right event furniture hire provider, you can rest assured that your event will be successful and memorable.
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dumpster35 · 2 years
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Dumpster Rental Guidelines and Recommendations
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Have you recently been thinking about renting a dumpster, but are unsure how the process even works? Wondering if the driveway is big enough, rental prices or whether or not a permit is necessary are just some of the concerns potential dumpster renters are faced with.
Having a roll-off dumpster is essential for any construction project, major home renovation venture and for other various industrial uses. However, if you've never rented before, this process could seem overwhelming and stressful.
This dumpster rental guide outlines each major factor to consider when deciding to rent a roll-off container. It offers tips for customers looking to rent a quality and affordable dumpster for their construction project, and also highlights questions you should be asking yourself when contemplating which company to rent from.
When the Time is Right to Rent a Dumpster
Construction and home renovation projects can often produce more waste than manageable for simply a few trashcans. This is an instance when it is appropriate to rent a dumpster to properly dispose of your unwanted waste. From household debris to roofing shingles and demolition materials, a rented roll-off dumpster is an easy solution to an organized, stress-free working environment.
How to Rent a Roll-Off Container
When it is decided that a dumpster is necessary for the project you are working on, choosing the correct size could be the most important factor of this process. Typically, temporary dumpsters will come in four sizes:
- 10 yard dumpster - approx. 12-14 ft. long x 8 ft. wide x 3-3.5 ft. high
- 20 yard dumpster - approx. 22 ft. long x 8 ft. wide x 4 ft. high
- 30 yard dumpster - approx. 22 ft. long x 8 ft. wide x 6 ft. high
- 40 yard dumpster - approx. 22 ft. long x 8 ft. wide x 8 ft. high
After choosing the size, the next step will be to verify with the renter how much weight is allowed in the container. It is crucial to choose the correct weight limit, because if the contents exceed the amount specified an additional charge is usually added to the rental fee.
When the weight and size is specified during the rental process, the next step will be finding out what is and is not allowed inside the dumpster itself. Contents allowed will vary with different rental companies and cities, but rules tend to remain consistent throughout most businesses. Contents typically banned include: wet paint, oil, gasoline, hazardous waste, flammable liquid, toxic materials, car tires and batteries, asbestos, etc. Be sure to ask for a prohibited items list when making the rental. Placing prohibited items in a container typically leads to an additional fee.
Another topic to cover when making a rental is identifying the space where the container will reside. Usually at a residential property the dumpsters will be set on the driveway or the street. An important fact to remember is that in most areas a permit is required if a container is placed on the street. Calling the city and purchasing a permit can resolve this, or occasionally a permit can be secured through the rental company. The area the dumpster will be dropped off should be cleared of any hazards, which include: low lying power lines, tree branches, fences or unleveled ground.
Finally, once you are finished using the rented dumpster, a call to the rental company for a pick-up is required. All companies have different rental periods, and knowing the number of days allowed for a rental is imperative to know before making a payment.
Choosing a Rental Company
The most important step in the rental process is choosing a quality and trustworthy company to work with. The biggest mistake most customers make when renting a dumpster is not clarifying specific pricing. Make sure the company has no hidden fees that could potentially increase the price of the rental by an astronomical amount. Some of these hidden charges include: fuel/environmental fee, delivery charge, disposal fee, etc. Charges just specified can potentially not be mentioned when making a rental, and can really add up at the end of your leasing period.
An ideal company to rent from is one that offers a flat rental rate. The charge will include delivery, pickup, disposal and taxes will also be included. Some companies also only have a four or five-day rental period, and all days past this time frame are an additional charge. Renting from a company that has a longer leasing period is more desirable Dumpster rental.
The key to choosing a company to rent from is to ask as many questions as possible. Make sure there are no hidden fees, specify the amount of allotted rental time and make sure the company has a trustworthy reputation. Choosing a company that has a flat rate is ideal, and don't be afraid to do online research before making an important decision such as this.
Using the tips and guidelines provided above will make this process considerably smoother and stress-free. Becoming a savvy dumpster rental customer is simple after knowing the basic guidelines and correct questions to ask.
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leadforcareer · 2 years
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How to Get a Freewasher and Dryer for Low-Income Families
Introduction
Introduction: It’s hard to find dryer sheets and Freewashers in low-income neighborhoods. And even harder to find a way to get them. But there are ways to help, and we’re going to show you how. First, let’s take a look at the options for getting dryer sheets and Freewashers in low-income communities. Second, we’ll tell you what you need to do to get started. Finally, we will give you some tips on how you can make your experience as successful as possible.
How to Get a Freewasher and Dryer for Low-Income Families.
To order a freewasher and dryer for a low-income family, you’ll need to first order one from an online retailer or through an intermediary. In most cases, this will be done through the family’s bank account.
Once you have your order in hand, it’s time to head to a store or outlet to pick up your new appliances. Most stores and outlets offer free or discounted delivery on orders over $50, so don’t hesitate to take advantage of this service.
Once you have your new appliances, be sure to set them up and enjoy your new digs! Many stores and outlets offer tips on how to get started with your new Freewasher and Dryer.
How to Use a Freewasher and Dryer for Low-Income Families.
If you’re looking to save money on clothes and dryers, it’s important to consider how you can use a freewasher and dryer for low-income families. Here, we cover the basics of how to use a freewasher and dryer for low-income families.
First, know that a freewasher and dryer are usually less expensive in price than purchasing individual items. To save money on your clothing and dryer purchase, follow these tips:
1) Choose the right type of Freewasher and Dryer for Your Needs: A freewasher is typically smaller in size than an air conditioner or refrigerator, so it can fit more clothes at once. This is great if you have a lot of clothes to wash or dried.
2) Make sure the Freewasher and Dryer You're Buying Can Do The Job: Make sure theFreew heater can do the job needed to dry clothes properly- like tumble drying or fabric softening. Many FreEWashers also come with an air compressor or hand held spinners for easy drying tasks.
3) Consider How Much Time You'll Need to Spend Once You've Got The Systems In Place: If you plan on using the systems frequently (and especially if your household has multiple people in it), make sure you plan ahead and spend enough time setting up the system so everyone is comfortable with it before departure.
Resources for Low-Income Families Using a Freewasher and Dryer.
There are many resources available to help low-income families use aFreewasher and dryer. The National Low Income Housing Coalition has a website that provides information on how to find affordable housing, access Tremont Social Services for laundry and dryer needs, or connect with pantry and fridge donations from friends or family. Additionally, the ACLU of Massachusetts offers a resource guide called "How To Get Along Without A Freewasher And Dryer" that helps low-income families resolve basic needs such as laundry and drying clothes.
How to Use Resources for Low-Income Families Using a Freewasher and Dryer
To use resources for laundry and drying clothes in low-income homes, there are a few things you need to do. First, research your community's pantry or fridge to see if any donations are available. Next, determine what size washing machine or dryer you need based on your home's square footage and budget. Finally, be sure to ask neighbours if they can lend you their washing machines or dryers for a short period of time so you can start using them without setting up an extra rental fee.
How to Get Help Using a Freewasher and Dryer for Low-Income Families
If you need help using aFreewasher and dryer for low-income families, there are several ways to get started. The most common approach is to reach out directly to local agencies like Tremont Social Services or the ACLU of Massachusetts who can provide support with laundry and drying clothes. However, some people choose alsoto seek out volunteer groups who offer assistance with tasks such as laundering clothes or setting upaundry schedules.
Conclusion
Freewashing and dryers can be a great way for low-income families to improve their lives. However, it is important to take some time to order and use the devices. By reading this guide, you can get started on ordering a freewasher and dryer for your home. Additionally, resources are available to help you use a freewasher and dryer for low-income families. By working together, you can make life easier for yourself and your loved ones.
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tinyboxxtink · 3 years
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"Not My Yacht" *Chapter 2*
Yes, for two days this is a semi short chapter, but I had another long today and have one more tomorrow and I wanted you to have SOMETHING. Weirdly though I had an entire different chapter written in my head, but when I started typing this came out instead. My original idea is still coming, this just added a fun little bonus getting there. I promise, tomorrow you will get a longer chapter.
Thank you loves for sticking by me through everything! I love you all.
Also, I'm finally using CHAPTER. I kept wanting to use it instead of PART but I just kept writing PART and was like WELP. But they're chapters, right?!
Ok I'll shut up.
Part 1 Here
Part 3
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Tag List
@madamsnape921
@lolliepopsicle
@chasingeverybreakingwave
@milkshqke
@wanniiieeee
@word-scribbless
@gibbs274
@sassyada
@aprildecker-blog
@bookishfanfic
@stars-in-the-skies-world
@stars-trash-18
@omgsuperstarg
@objection-argumentative
And @storiesofsvu for Rita check. lol.
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When five o’clock rolled around, Rita came walking out of her office with a stack of papers and her briefcase, balancing her purse on her barely free arm.
“Y/N, Why are you still here? Did I not unlock your chains?” She laughed.
“Haha….no, ma’am” You nervously laughed. “I um, I think I’m waiting for someone,”
“You think?” She raised a curious eyebrow. “If you’re waiting on Barba, you’re going to waiting a long time, sweetie,”
“Wha-? How--? Why, exactly?” You asked her totally flabbergasted by the insinuation that not only had Rafael asked you out, but was bailing already.
“He tends to get a little...involved, in his cases. Poor man is a workaholic,” She feigned pity for him.
“Right,” You nodded to her comically overflowing briefcase and papers. “Something you know nothing about,”
“Touché,” She winked. “I’d give him a call, make sure he hasn’t forgotten about you, dear. Before the cleaning staff shows up,” She laughed and sauntered out of her office, leaving you alone in the dark.
You glanced down at your phone. He hadn’t really specified a time, just-- “Tonight”. What did that even mean? Tonight. Like early evening dinner, or a midnight snack after he was done with his cases? You should probably text him. Or call him. Or text him.
TO BARBA: Heyyy….
Wait. Was three y’s too many? Wasn’t that a rule? You show affection by how many y’s you use? Is that a thing kids do these days? Wait, no you’re not a kid. And he certainly was NOT a kid. No. Be a grown up about this.
TO BARBA: Hi I’m just...checking in.
Checking in? What did that even mean? And why the ellipsis? There doesn’t need to be a pause in a text. That’s why it’s a text. You pause in your mind before typing. Idiot.
TO BARBA: What’s up?
Ok. Short and simple. To the point. No pressure, no demanding. Just... ‘checking in’. You hated yourself. Alright fine, good enough send it. SEND IT. HIT SEND NOW.
MESSAGE SENT.
Your phone shook in your trembling hand as you waited for the ellipsis of him writing back. That was too much, no no just put it back in your pocket and he’ll text you when he--
BARBA CALLING
Oh god, a phone call? Who calls people anymore? Grown ups, that’s who. Answer the phone like an adult.
“H-Hello?” You answered it as if he had the wrong number.
“Hey, Cinderella,” His smooth voice came through your earpiece. “I’m so sorry, I should have been more specific about the time,”
“Oh, yeah no-- no big deal, I’m just here at work….alone, in the dark…” You muttered the last words to yourself as you looked around the dark office.
“Right. Well, I’m kind of wrapped up in this case right now--” He started, making your heart drop. Well, Rita called it. He’s just married to his job, no time for women, let alone you. Time to just--
“....Would you hate me if I asked you to come help me?”
“...I’m sorry, what?” You blinked in confusion at your phone. So, was he actually asking you out or trying to snake you as an assistant from Rita? Is that what he meant by ‘dinner’? “Hey come bring me food and help me file these cases, because I’m so sexy and cocky and--”
“You know what, I’m so sorry I just heard how that sounded. You’ve been doing this all day, the last thing you wanna do is come--”
“Sure!” You cut him off a little loudly. What were you doing?! You’re just going to lay down and let him use your services for free? Well, when you put it that way it sounded pretty skeezy about yourself.
“....Are you sure? Because we can just have dinner another night--”
“....Yeah I have a feeling that will never happen,” You cut him off with a laugh.
“Wha--no, it will! I just--”
“Your wife comes first, I get it,” You cut him off again.
“My wife?”
“Yeah you’re married to your work,” You smirked into the phone.
“Wow, quippy Cinderella. Guess you’re more confident on the phone without my gorgeous face tripping you up now, aren’t you?”
“Do you want my help or not, Casanova?” He was totally right; without those green emeralds staring into your soul you were actually a pretty funny and smart person. Maybe it would be better to just have this date on the phone.
"Yes, absolutely," He sighed with a smile.
“Did you want me to bring food, or am I just supposed to eat paperclips and vending machine leftovers??”
“I’ll order some pizza, do you like pizza?”
“....I live in New York Barba. Obviously I like pizza,” You teased.
“Right,” He chuckled. “Well I’ll be here--”
“I know where your office is,” You cut him off for the third time.
“Oh, do you?” He asked in a sneaky tone, as if he thought you’d been googling him or something.
“Um, yeah,” Your voice fell an octave softer. “Actually I’ve been there several times, dropping off stuff from Rita for you,” Of course he wouldn’t remember that. Why would he remember that? You weren’t anything special.
“Shit,” He muttered as if chastising himself. “Y/N I’m so sorry, I--”
“It’s fine,” You assured him as you headed down to the subway. “I’m uh, I’m getting on the train so I’ll see you soon,” You hung before he could reply.
--------------
It wasn’t that far to Rafael’s office from Rita’s, just a few stops away. You quickly hurried up the stairs back into the Manhattan air as you swiftly walked through the sea of people leaving corporate America to go home to Suburbia. Finally you reached the building, went for the door and-- it was locked.
Well of course it was locked, nobody else in their right mind would be here this late-- so clearly you and Rafael were out of your minds. Shit. Should you call him? Was there a buzzer? Before you could think of another solution a pizza delivery man was walking up to you. Maybe ‘man’ was too generous, he was probably around 16 or 17.
“Delivery for Mr. Barba,” He handed you the pizza. Did you look like a “Mr. Barba” to him?!
“I um,” You stammered as the hot pizza burned the sides of your arms you were holding it on. “I’m not Mr. Barba,”
“Are you taking it to him?” He asked you with a slight attitude.
“I um,” You thought a moment. Well you were going to see him, so yes theoretically you would be taking the pizza with you to him. “...Yes,”
“That’ll be 46.57.” He whipped out a credit card scanner on his phone.
“E-Excuse me?” You were taken aback. Now Barba had you buying him dinner? And what kind of pizza costs basically 50 bucks?!
“2 Large pizzas, an order of cheesy bread, a dessert pizza and delivery fee,” The kid read off the receipt from his phone. “I only accept credit or debit cards, and please tip generously,”
“Yeah right,” You muttered with a roll of your eyes as you pulled out your credit card and swiped it across his phone. The light turned green and a receipt printed off an attachment to his phone. He ripped it off and handed it to you, then nonchalantly walked back down the stairs to wherever he was parked.
“Awesome,” You sighed. You still didn’t know how to get inside, and now you were carrying all this hot food. All of this for a pair of green eyes?!
To make matters worse, your phone started going off in your purse. You groaned and tried to put all of the boxes down softly, but the night wind blew them onto the pavement, HARD.
“Shit!” You groaned louder as you tried to salvage the food while pulling your phone from your purse. Of COURSE.
BARBA CALLING
“I can’t get in,” You simply stated as a greeting on the phone.
“What?”
“I can’t get in the building, Barba,” You grumbled, now on a 8 on the annoyance scale.
“Oh! Oh God,” The line went dead. Awesome.
After a few minutes while you were trying to rebalance all of the boxes in your arms, one of the big glass doors swung open right into you. The boxes all pressed against you, their hot, saucy, cheesy and chocolatey goodness smearing all over your work outfit.
“SHIT!!!!!!” You screamed in horror.
“Oh my god, Oh god Y/N I am SO--” Rafael started to apologize profusely, but you noticed he was trying his best not to burst out laughing.
“I’m sorry, do you think this is funny?!” You asked angrily while you peeled a pepperoni from your hair.
“No, not at all,” He shook his head vigorously, but kept giggling behind his eyes.
“You do!” You stomped your heel, causing marinara to roll down your legs. “You are absolutely laughing at me being covered in all of your stupid food that I had to pay for by the way--”
“Oh no, really?” He suddenly turned sincere.
“No, Rafael,” You scoffed as you tried pulling cheese from your skirt. “I just had sex with him in the parking lot and we called it square,”
“Really--?!”
“NO NOT REALLY!”
“Okay! Okay I’m sorry, really I am,” Rafael tried to show you sympathy, but you looked so damn cute covered in a tasty meal.
“Yeah I can see that, you’re grinning like a five year old,” You rolled your eyes.
“I’m sorry, Y/N I really am,” He gave up trying to hide a laugh. “But you have to admit it’s pretty funny--”
“I DON’T THINK--” You started to scream at him again, but his smile made these cute little crinkles in his eyes, and his laugh was like an angel’s chorus. You might have been covered in food, but you would be covered in manure if it made him laugh like that.
“For what it’s worth, you look delicious,” He teased you, pulling an actual full piece of pizza from your chest and biting it.
“Oh my god, you’re so gross,” You did your best not to laugh, you were still supposed to be angry.
“Yum, Y/N flavor, my favorite,” He laughed for a moment just as you both realized what he had said. “Uh, I mean--” He looked away in embarrassment, and you swear you saw his face flush red.
“Um no counselor,” You bit your lip with a smile. “I’m pretty sure I taste better than a mix of pizza sauce and chocolate,”
“I’m sure you do,” Rafael bravely retorted, now that he knew you were in the playing mood.
“....But seriously, now I have to go home and get this shit off--”
“I have a shower in my office,” He blurted out.
“....Excuse me?” You blinked, not believing you heard him right.
“I...I have a shower in my office,”
“Oh my god, Rafael Barba are you that addicted to work that you live here?”
“No!” He rolled his eyes. “It’s for emergencies,”
“Emergencies? Like what?”
“Like a beautiful woman covered in pizza toppings and chocolate,” He smirked. “Now come on, I don’t want anyone around here thinking I’m dating a crazy person,” He opened the glass doors again and escorted you into the lobby of the building.
Your mind didn’t know what to focus on first; the fact that he had this mysterious office shower, that he had offered for you to use said shower, or the fact that he just referred to you as a ‘woman he was dating’. You just followed him silently into his office with a smitten grin on your face.
He wasn’t lying when he was in the ‘middle’ of something. Papers were strewn all about his desk, a white board with bullet points for arguments and cross examinations scribbled on it. You finally got a good look at him without the anger of having food all over your judgement. He looked tired, not the usual smooth and pristine Rafael Barba you were used to. But when he looked back at you to show you where his shower was, his green eyes sparkled gazing into yours.
“So, I have some spare suits in a closet here, would you mind hanging out in one of my dress shirts while I wash...these?” He gestured to your dirty clothes. Wait, wash?
You suddenly realized he had led you into a secret room to the side of his office, behind a bookcase.
“Wha…” You looked around the room. There was a shower, a wardrobe, a washer/dryer combo, and a suit steamer. “Jesus Barba, are you sure you don’t live here?”
“No I promise I don’t,” He shook his head with a laugh. “...But I may have on occasion fallen asleep here enough to invest in this,”
“And what happens when this office is passed on to a new ADA?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Then I’m sealing this place off like a mausoleum,” He stated very seriously, causing you to giggle. He loved your giggle, it was so small and soft, just like you.
“Anyway,” He shook off his momentary daze at your giggle hoping you didn’t notice. “Like I said-- Shower, dress shirt. Just put your dirty clothes in the washer and we’ll pop them in the dryer later,”
“Right,” You nodded, definitely having noticed his dreamy stare at your giggle. How had you gone from completely under his radar to making him giddy like a school boy in two days?
“Right,” He nodded back. “I’ll just be out here...ordering another pizza,” He smirked. “By the way, I’ll totally reimburse you for the one you’re wearing,” He stuck his tongue out at you with a huge grin.
“Oh you better,” You gave him the same face back. “Or I’ll cover you in it,” You lightly pressed a marinara sauce covered finger into his perfectly white dress shirt. He glanced down at it in horror.
“Oh that was so--” He started to tickle and attack you, but realized that would only make his outfit dirtier. “This isn’t over,” He wagged a finger at you as he pointed you to the shower. You gave him one last cheeky smile as he walked out and shut the door to his secret room.
What was happening? Why were you getting to him so easily, so fast? How could he have not even remembered that he had ‘met’ you several times? Well, one thing was for sure. He was never going to forget this night.
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normatural · 4 years
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JJ MAYBANK | MR.16
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Summary: helping your friends with the delivers could be funnier than you thought.
Warnings: creepy rose cameron, language.
A/N: I just saw that video of a girl auditioning for a scene between Rose Cameron and JJ and thought it would be fun.. but for real, that scene was cringe asf. I'll proofread later, just needed to write something.
- also thank you sooo much for all the love and support on my last one shot, love you guys! you have no idea how happy it makes me <3
...
All your thursday mornings on summer were reserved to go with Pope to figure 8 with his father's boat and help him with an extra pair of hands with the deliveries. You knew that his scholarship's interview was close and that finishing his shift earlier meant more time to study and prepare himself for the big day so you didn't even think twice before jumping in. Sometimes you'd even cover for him, almost threatning to throw him out of the boat if he said "you don't have to, really Y/N" twice.
Pope never asked for the help, to be honest you were the one who insisted on it and he had no other choice but, glady, accept.
If the boy had any chance to get a brighter future, something that he work his ass off for, then you'd do anything in your power to help your friend have a better life.
"Yo, I got this one, princess." JJ winked at you, taking the bags from your hands.
If you didn't know the boy enough you'd say he was being a gentleman, letting you rest after you took the two last delivers. But you knew him and that meant you also knew that he just wanted to try his luck with the tips.
You glanced at the name written on the bag again and then at JJ.
He knew he was about to walk straight to the lion's cage. I mean, Cameron's huge ass house, right?
JJ mumbled something among the line of 'it's okay' before jumping out of the boat, walking towards his least favorite place.
You and Pope looked at each other and shrugged, but you wouldn't complain. The sun was hotter than usual today and why not take off your shirt to work on your tan, feel the sun kiss your skin and relax while you chat with Pope?
Sometimes your conversations with Pope would let the rest of the group a little bit worrid. You could spend hours talking about dead bodies, what killers could do to properly hide a body snd things like that.
You got up from where you were laying on the floor and looked around. It's been a while since JJ was gone and yet, there was no sign of him, which messed with your nerves.
What if something happed to him?
Nothing good came from JJ taking to long to come by when you were on Figure 8.. or anywhere in the island actually.
What if he bumped into Raffe and his minions on hus way to the house?
"Took you long enough" Pope laughed when you jumped out of the boat to look after the blonde.
To be honest, he thought you'd have done that five minutes ago, which let him surprised. You were always worried about JJ and the others would tease the hell out of you for that.
You slowed your steps when you caught a glimpse of his blonde hair on the Cameron's porche, talking to someone as he scratched his neck.
Carefully you made your way closer to them, trying to don't get caught because your curiosity has gotten the best of you. What the hell he had to talk for more than three seconds with a kook, a Cameron kook, without being tied down or something?
"What do I own you, Mr.Sixteen?" you jaw almost went to the floor when you heard the voice of none other than Rose Cameron.
You'd have thought that you were crazy if you hadn't took a step foward, hiding in one of the fancy bunches before the front door to see the way he basically undressed him with her eyes.
What. The. Fuck?!
"It's just the cost.. plus a 100 for delivery" JJ pushed his arms with the bags foward, his leg bouncing and you knew that the woman caught him off of guard.
You bite you lips, doing your best to don't laugh when she rolled her eyes, ignoring the bags and how JJ tried to look away from her, without sucess.
"I know about that. I asked you what do I owed you for your effort."
You had to put you hand on your mouth. It you kept holding you laugher you were sure you'd end up with a broken rib or something.
"You mean a tip on top of the delivery fee? That's okay, miss Cameron. You don't own me anything"
JJ, your best friend JJ, just declined a tip from the kook queen herself?
You frowned, you laughter long forgot when you saw Rose's finger touch his shoulders and go all the way down his arms.
Okay. That was it. Enough of that shit.
You came out of the brush, jogging to the porsh again as if you had arrived only now. JJ looked to the side and found you, his eyes widening in surprise and relief as you saw his shoulders relax a bit.
"Baby, what is taking you so long? Mr. Heyward is going to kill us if we.. Oh, hey Mrs. Cameron." you forced a smile at the woman, putting an arm around JJ when she arched a brow at you, probably surprise with the boy having a girlfriend.
"I was just.. waiting for Miss Cameron to open the door." He forced a smile to you, trying to hide the blush creeping to his cheeks before looking at the woman, pushing his arms with the bags one more time. "Here, ma'am."
Rose took a deep breath and called one of the maids to get the deliver, giving the most fake smile you have ever seen to the both of you.
"I didn't know you had a boyfriend, Y/N" she stared a few seconds to JJ before turning to you and you had to use all your control to don't roll your eyes.
You only delivered things to her once in a week, of course she didn't know about your life.
"Only a idiot to say no to this hot stuff right here." you intertwined your finger with his, getting on your tip toes to leave a kiss on his cheek. "Right, baby?"
You were pretty sure by now that the boy was petrified and you tried not to laugh.
He blinked a few times as if you had pulled him out of a daze and nodded.
"Yeah, uh, right. Bye, Miss Cameron." he tried his best to don't run away and dragged out of the house once he got the money.
You made sure you were away from the door when you started laughing, falling on the floor.
"What do I owe you, Mr. Sixteen?" you mimicked her voice, tried to use the same 'sensual' aka cringe tone she used and pucked your lips to JJ.
If he weren't red when you arrived, he was 50 shades of flustered right now, knowing that you actually heard everything.
"Fuck off!" he groaned, only noticing that your fingers were interwined when he pulled his hand away to push you, which only made you laugh harder.
"Bro, she was aaall over you and you were like on run away mode." you put your hand on your belly, it already aching from the lack of air. "I'm gonna.. die!"
JJ put his hands on your shoulders once you got close to the boat, stopping in front of you and making you look at him. His eyes were hard but you could see the pleading in it.
"Don't say a word." he said slowly as it'd make it easier for you to understand or make you obey.
You nodded and bit you lip, pretending to zip your mouth and throw it away. JJ stared at you a little longer and you held his gaze, his hands slowly pulling away from you, probably making sure you'd keep your word and don't start acting all annoying again.
Almost reaching the boat you called him and he turned around, brows furrowed.
"I don't even get a 'thank you, baby'? Gosh, you are a terrible boyfriend." you brought your hands to your chest, pretending to be hurt when he showed you his middle finger and got on the boat.
Pope had went to the other deliver and it was JJ's time to be alone with you. He tried his best to drink his beer and ignore your funny gaze and smirk to him.
That's when you remembered something.
Mr. Heyward didn't charged a hundred bucks for deliver.
"You son of a bitch!" you gasped, throwing you watter bottle and JJ. "That's how you get your tips?!"
It was his time to laugh and wink at you.
"They love me, Y/N. What can I do? It's a gift." He shrugged, a cocky smile dancing on his lips before he took another sip of his beer.
+
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birth-fic-lover · 4 years
Text
I’ll birth your baby part 1
As everyone in Fiona’s office packed up for the day one of her work friends asked “any plans for the weekend?”
“The usual” Fiona said, knowing that no one knew what her usual activity was. “Yourself?” 
“My husband is taking me to his mothers, gonna try and convince her to give up her snake collection.”
“Good luck” Fiona said picking up her bag. She headed out the door and back to her home, she checked her phone, her client had requested an 6pm appointment.
As she parked her car she spotted her client, not because they had met before but because she was almost 9 months pregnant. She was stood with her husband, “he must be in on this too” she said to herself as she turned off her engine.
She got out and held out her hand “You must be Amanda”.
“Yes, thank you for fitting us in a bit earlier. Me and the hubby wanted to have one last weekend away” Amanda said.
“Of course, you might as well take the chance while you can” Fiona said taking them into her home. “I am glad you found my house alright”.
“Yes, it is a bit out of the way” the husband commented.
“As you can imagine, with doing things like this neighbors would just complicate things” Fiona explained leading them to the examination room. “So as I expained on the phone, I will do one final examination. For your piece of mind and mine, besides my legal team insists. Of course you will get a full birthing report within the week, if I have time before you arrive on sunday I will try and do it then. I know that some like to use an element of truth when recounting their birth story”
“Yes we read over the contract, in the case that our child could develop any disabilities relating to the birth we would contact you directly?” the husband asked.
“No it would be my legal team who would of course inform me, your baby is extreamly healthy and I see no problems from your file.” Fiona helped Amanda onto the examination table, “you are aware of the multibles clause? If you are found to of been carrying twins or more I do have a hefty fee, it’s just to stop any couples trying to get a cheeper price. Besides the suprise on my end isn’t very nice or safe for the babies”.
“Yes we are certain that it is one” Amanda said.
Fiona used the doppler to examine the baby, “yes everything is in order to proceed. Because your child’s father is fully aware of your actions we have a little bit less paperwork”.
“Does that happen often?” Amanda asked.
“Most women decide they would rather tell there loved ones that they braved it alone, including there husband. Or sometimes it’s the cause the father isn’t in the picture, I even work with those who it would be tramatic for them to give birth.”
Amanda nodded, “so how does it work? Is there a device you use to transfer the baby into you?”
Fiona smiled “I have always had the ability to transfur unborn children into me”.
“Oh right” the husband said not fully understanding.
After the couple filled out all the paperwork on the office, they expected to retuen to examination room. But Fiona said “no need I can do it in here, Stan you may want to hold your wife’s hand”.
“Will it hurt?” Amanda asked.
“It will just feel a bit strange” Fiona promised, she took her chair and faced Amanda. She had remebered to put on one of her more looser work dresses so there was no need to change. She put her hands on Amanda’s covered belly and focused.
Amanda felt no pain but she felt like someone had pulled a plug out and all her amniotic fluid was swerling around her womb as it drained out of her. Her belly softened and Fiona’s began to bloat. After a minute she felt her childs placenta ditached from within her, it suddenly disappeared and Fiona suddenly had a full term bump. Fiona’s hands were still on her now flattened belly as she felt the last drops of fluid leave her. Fiona then removed her belly, and smiled at the amazed couple.
“One last set of papers to sign to confirm the transfer” Fiona said, she rubbed her belly while watching them sign. Amanda then put her hand out and Fiona leaned her belly towards it, Amanda smiled as she felt the kick. 
Fiona wished the couple a happy trip and promised to call once the delivery was complate.
As Fiona climbed the stairs she realised she had forgotten to set up her birthing room. She sighed, being full term would not make the job easy. The baby was already between her hips. She slowly got to work getting all the fresh medical equipment out of it’s packaging, she then went to put the plastic cover on the bed when she realised that it was downstairs. She walked down one hand on the handrails the other supporting her belly, she went to get the plasic cover and found climbing the stairs slow and difficult now she didn’t have the free hand to support her. 
She could feel a back pain starting as she finally reached the room again, she tried to move her back around but it kept it’s strenth. Fiona knew it wasn’t truly a contraction, but that labor was starting in one form or another.
In some ways she was relived, when she had not enough progress and there was less then 24 hours till pick up she would have to resort in breaking her waters or using a drug to start contractions. She wondered if the baby could tell it was in a diffrent womb, she felt some hard kicks during the rest of the evening as she ate some dinner. Just something light to chase away hunger.
As she was wondering if she should sleep in the birthing room that night or not she felt her first proper contraction, she could feel her muscles warming up. But they were not too bad, they never were at this stange. The pains were more annoying than painful, as she was answering emails for future clients. She worked secretly with some charitites that would pay for women with disabilites to use her service. She would always charge the charities a fraction of her usual rate, happy to help those who wouldn’t be able to do the delivery.
As the evening got later she wasn’t able to concentrate on anything but her breathing. When Fiona was in pain, she had a bad habit of holding her breath. She decided to go upstairs while they were still 5 minutes apart, she did not want to be stuck downstairs.
Another benifit of living without neighbors was that in the summer she could labor outside, the cool air would feel good against her sweaty belly. She wished that she could do that tonight, there was something sexual about feeling like an animal grunting and groaning thought her pain surrounded by trees. But her clients had spacifically asked to have the birth documented in detail, she didn’t think they would apprecaite her choosing an outside birth.
As she started to climb she had to stop, “come on baby, we gotta get through this together”. She tried to wait out the contraction still standing, as soon as it was over she continued to climb. She made her camp in the birthing room, she hoped this wouldn’t take all weekend. “It’s lucky your mum and dad gave me over when you did” she said to the bump, this baby was ready. 
Over the next few hours all Fiona could do was contend with the contractions as they built up. Fiona leaned against the wall timing her contractions a bit closer now, the pain ramped up quickly on some contractions and wretchedly slowly on others. When she felt peak of the contraction, she would let out long moans as her muscles held her womb tight. Sometimes just as she was feeling some relief, it would tighten up again catching her by surprise.
By the early morning Fiona was in almost in constant pain and the pressure inside her womb was unbearable.She was on the bed and rocked on my knees,  anything to dissipate the pressure. She knew that she would need to break her waters at this rate, she hadn’t diatated much in the past hour. The uncomfortable fullness of her womb made her belly seemed to feel fuller and bigger with each contraction. 
Fiona longed for the urge to push, she reached to the medical trolly by her bed. She grabbed the amnihook and then tensed as another contraction came, the contraction pushed the baby another few centimetres further into her birth canal. As soon as it was over she inserted the hoot and used to tear open her amniotic sac. She felt her waters leaving her body, with it her contrations go stronger. 
Time ticked by as Fiona approached the 4-hour mark since her water broke, her contractions went from 2 minutes apart to 1 minute to seconds apart while their intensity went off the scale. Fiona bore down as her hands kept her legs spread open as much as possible. She could feel her baby spread her birth canal open and slowly descend down it.
She felt the bulge and smiled in relief, it looked like it would not take long now. Each push Fiona was making progress, her belly clenching around her swollen womb as it was happening.
Her swollen belly had decreased in size as bore down again and again, until she pushed once more and her baby reached a full crown. The pain was so immense that it felt like someone had taken a blowtorch to her crouch. The head slowly inched its way out, before a pop of fluids brought the head out and hanging between her legs. She just had the shoulders to contend with now, she took deep breaths and gave a huge push feel both shoulders makin there way out. She didn’t give up, on the next contraction she did the same and the baby side out. 
Fiona’s body relaxed as she picked the crying baby up and comforted him, she cut the cord and set to work on the umbilical cord. 
A few hours later she had already contacted the parents who had decided to come back early so they could meet their son. Fiona had napped and spent the day cleaning up and writing her birth report. Stan gave her a genorous tip for deliverying there son so quickly, before Fiona could blink it was monday morning. She had magically healed by now, she greeted her work friend. “How was the mother in law?”
“Bad news she tricked us into buy her a new snake, how was your weekend?”
“Got my jobs done quicker then usual so spend sunday resting”.
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fleckcmscott · 4 years
Text
The Vanity
Summary: Arthur tries to get ready for work. Y/N joins him.
Warnings: Smut, swearing
Words: 3,774
A/N: This request comes from the marvelous brain of @ithinkimawriter. Again, thanks to @sweet-nothings04 for beta-reading!
If you have any thoughts or questions, please comment, feel free to message me, or send me an ask. Requests for Arthur and WWH are open!
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After he started street performing and getting gigs again, Arthur found he needed a better place to put his supplies for work. The two small shelves in the bathroom were already covered by his and Y/N's toiletries, so they didn't fit there. He'd been keeping it all in a plastic bag in the closet, but that wasn't ideal. The enclosed space had a tendency to get too hot due to how the heat worked in the apartment, which made his make-up dry out. And the brushes were getting damaged because of improper storage.
Having to borrow money from her wasn't the only reason he was hesitant to mention he would prefer a vanity. Y/N would often sit on the closed lid of the toilet, watching him lean over the sink while he applied greasepaint to his face. If he had his own work area, he assumed she'd probably hold back from him when he was in it, like she did when he was in his writing nook. It was one of the ways she showed him respect. But he loved her keeping him company when he'd get in costume, how they would discuss the day and plan for the evening.
She'd begun asking more about his job, seeming to be genuinely interested in it. They were simple questions: how long he'd been a clown ("About ten years. Maybe twelve?"); what he liked best about it ("Every day is different. And making kids laugh."); and what the hardest part was. He pondered on what answer he could give, one that was accurate, but wouldn't cause her concern. He hadn't wanted to tell her he still had to deal with mean people (though incidents were seldom and he was better at handling them). If he did that, she'd probably insist on riding with him, despite his reassurances he could take care of himself. "The commute can be rough," he'd admitted. Then he'd bent down to her and tapped her nose lightly with the tip of his brush. "It's good knowing I have you to come home to." Her wide smile and gleaming squint had been full of adoration, in spite of her reaching for a tissue to wipe her face.
Eventually he told her, though. "There's a cosmetic table at Donahue's Department Store," he said, giving her the flyer they'd gotten in the mail as he sunk onto the sofa cushion beside her. He pointed at the picture of the vanity, with its dark brown veneer and two drawers on both sides of the sitting area. The oval mirror had sides that folded in at an adjustable angle, which, he explained, would make it easier for him to ensure the white base covered every part of his face. "We could put it on my side of the bed. By the window. It's only a couple feet long, a foot deep. I already measured the space."
She looked intrigued. "Mr. Fleck, you want to put a giant mirror next to our bed?" The glint in her eye was obvious.
He blinked at her. "I need a space to put my make-up. The lighting will be better there."
Studying the page, she leaned her head on him, a smirk in her voice. "Of course."
He wondered why she was joking around when he was being serious. But he continued with what he had to say. "I don't want you to stop watching me get ready if we buy it. It'd be yours, too. It's not expensive. But- But I'd need to borrow a little from you. I could pay you ba-"
"Don't start with that," she interrupted. "I'll call them right now." With a kiss to his shoulder, she got up and walked to the phone. He eagerly waited in the kitchen entrance, worrying his pockets while she sat on the counter making notes. Then she hung up and gave him the good news: the store would be able to deliver it Friday afternoon, cash-on-delivery, fully assembled for a small fee. Arthur grabbed his wallet, took out all $22, and shoved it at her until she rolled her eyes and stuck it in an envelope for the payment. "I'll put a couple mascaras in there," she said wryly. "Then maybe you'll stop worrying about the money."
~~~~~
The party would be starting at 1:00 PM. Arthur had to hop on the red line from Burnley, transfer to the blue line in Hinckley, then take the train to Gotham Village. The commute would be just under an hour if there were no delays (which had become more frequent ever since the prior year's budget cuts). Gary had assured him he didn't have to worry. He'd worked for a friend of the family before and they were nice people. The kid liked magic tricks and balloon animals. It'd be easy. And he'd be home for the Saturday Night Made-for-TV movie Y/N wanted to catch with him. (Courtroom dramas weren't his thing, but he wouldn't miss the chance to settle his arm around her and pretend to be engrossed.)
Sitting at the vanity, with its round stool and solid, cream color cushion, made him feel like a professional getting ready to face the day. Even if he was a clown. The light shining through the sheer, muslin curtains of their bedroom was bright enough to get started. After removing his shirt and raking his brown locks back, he dabbed the brush in his pot of white foundation. The bristles ran across his forehead and strong brow in even lines, over the straight bridge and rounded tip of his nose, then down his right temple, careful not to get the pigment in his sideburn. Tilting his head and holding steady, he painted curved, smooth strokes over his sharp cheekbone, down to his jawline, then repeated the motions on the left side of his face. His mouth parted as he colored the area under his nose, his thin lips, and chin. When the paint was distributed evenly, he blended it with a sponge, using small, circular motions.
Y/N's soft footsteps approached as he finished the blue triangles above and below his left eye. "What kind of sandwich do you want to take with you?" she asked from the bedroom doorway.
That turned the corner of his mouth up. Whenever Arthur had a job around lunch, she packed him something to eat. He hadn't yet gotten use to being taken care of. The attention made him feel self-conscious. He wasn't certain he'd ever believe he deserved it. But more and more often, he found himself able to simply appreciate her thoughtfulness. "Anything will be okay. Wait - do we have turkey?"
"Yeah. I'll make it soon." He watched her in the mirror as she walked up behind him and sat on his side of the bed. "You don't have to leave for a couple hours," she said, working on her thumbnail with a file. "I'm surprised you’re in here already."
It was a bit early to be preparing for the gig, but he didn't want to be late. If these people really were as gracious as Gary claimed, maybe he'd be able to perform again at their next party. Or they'd recommend him to other families. Then he'd definitely be able to pay off the ring he was buying Y/N and give it to her in October, as he'd planned. He finished working on the triangle under his right eye, having already done the one on his brow. "I wanna make sure I get it right," he said. "I used to do it every day."
She got up and propped herself on the edge of the table, dropping the emery board on it. "You're much better at that than I am," she said as he drew the outline of an exaggerated smile, then filled it in. "I'm lucky I don't poke my eye out with my liner."
Chuckling, he let his gaze flit up to hers before continuing. It was difficult not to be distracted by her proximity; she was pretty even in her casual, weekend outfit. The black, white-seamed tank top showed off the contours of her breasts. And its slits, stopping just above her hips, enticed him. Glancing at her legs, he admired the curves exposed by her matching, form-fitting track shorts. The stray hairs on her calves were few, leftovers from her electric razor - he’d have to remind her to change the blade.
She scooted closer. "Do you know how beautiful you are in that?" she said, indicating his make-up. "You took my breath away when I first saw it. Well, that paired with your good hair."
A scoff left him as he put red eyebrows midway up his forehead. The paint helped him get into character. But he was aware his visage was more weathered than most thirty-five year old men. And he disliked how the color would accentuate the lines and crevices in his face. "It shows my wrinkles," he murmured, to himself as much as to her.
"I love your wrinkles," she said. "And your squishy cheeks." Then she cupped his face. He recoiled almost instantly, grasping her hand. A bit of paint had gotten on her. "Oops, I smudged you." Before he could protest, she grabbed the white brush from the jar behind her and perched herself on him. It caught him off guard. But after a few seconds, he put his left arm around her waist to steady her.
The tension in his body grew and his eyelids drifted shut. The bristles tickled with Y/N controlling them - he'd never had someone else do his make-up before. The wet of the paint and the weight of her on his lap reminded him of one of his earliest fantasies of her. He'd imagined bringing her to HaHa's and showing her off to his co-workers. (In particular, Randall, that asshole who'd been married and divorced twice, constantly complained about his exes and whoever he was seeing, and probably didn't even know what a clit was.) Even though they'd made fun of him, and he didn't understand all their comments about women, he could have proven he was worthy of a girlfriend.
Arthur sighed. He didn't like how the tenderness she was showing him prompted his thinking to go to such a bitter place. Especially since he felt he was doing better and believed he was moving on. Not wanting to spoil the lovely morning he was having with her, he concentrated on the physical space around him, the way Dr. Ludlow had taught him. He focused on the warmth of Y/N's form on his thighs, the hint of her pleasing natural scent over the chalky smell of the greasepaint, the way her fingers curled on his chest as she tried to fix the smear she'd made. The burning in his shoulders alerted him to the fact that he was flushing, and he ducked his head slightly.
It wasn't the best moment to get aroused - he really did want to get ready for work. But then she leaned into him, her breasts flush with his torso, and his heartbeat quickened. Her pebbled nipples through the thin fabric of her top prompted him to slowly trace the hem of her shorts. With his blood rushing to his groin, he nearly didn't hear her sound of displeasure. "What?" he rasped.
"I'm making this worse."
He moved to look past her, in the mirror. The carefully formed triangle still had a wide base, but one side was uneven, the tapering causing it to look like an icicle. He shook his head and seized the brush, pretending to be annoyed. "This is why I started early."
"Really?" she replied, tousling his hair. A couple stray curls fell onto his forehead. "I was hoping it was so we'd have time." The slight scrape of her nails on his scalp, and the invitation in her eyes made his mouth run dry.
Since they'd gotten together, he'd been learning his boundaries and figuring out what he liked. Y/N was understanding and patient, and happily answered any questions he could bring himself to ask. And when he misinterpreted something or made a mistake, she accepted it with humor. Her easy manner and generosity healed any embarrassment, even when he needed a few minutes to stop being flustered.
Making love with his clown face on wasn't something they had discussed. But if she wanted to, he wasn't opposed. He huffed, put the brush on the table, then let his fingertips slide down her neck. When she adjusted her legs and bumped his erection, he dipped under the strap of her shirt. "Time for what?" He hoped he sounded confident enough to tease her. The kiss she gave him was urgent but he drew back. "This stuff doesn't taste good," he warned.
"I don't care," she breathed, dipping to his mouth again, arms going around him. At that, he reached up her shorts, in a hurry to have her as close to him as possible. Lips continuing to pull at hers, he helped her stand and take them off, along with her underwear. He wanted to watch as she straddled him, but her kisses were demanding, and he was losing the ability to think clearly. Instead, he palmed her ass, savoring the feel of her slow but enthusiastic undulations against his length. Eventually, she broke away from him, pressing her forehead to his. "I made a mess," she giggled.
He looked down between them. The stain of her slick had gotten on the front of his blue pants, its faint whiteness shining in the bright sunlight. "Oh..." He licked his upper lip at the sight and shuddered. "Y/N?"
"Yes?"
One of her requests had been that he attempt to be more explicit, to tell her what he wanted. He might as well try it again now. Swallowing thickly, he forced the words out. "I need to fuck you."
The light laugh that left her was delighted. "I'm right here," she purred as she helped him shed her shirt.
Once it was gone, he lifted her off him and sat her on the vanity, suddenly overcome with the need to take her. He threaded his fingers through her hair, angling his head upwards to tangle his tongue with hers. The grip she had on his biceps was almost bruising but he loved it. It made her inexplicable desire for him tangible. Slowly, he traced down over her stomach to hold her hips. His mouth reached her chest, and he panted between his sucking of her nipples and open-lipped kisses on her breasts.
He backed away, taking in the make-up he'd smeared on her body and face. The possession he felt at that shocked him, but he enjoyed it all the same. Then he gazed down at her core with hooded eyes and groaned. She was beautiful, splayed before him like she was, her center red, swollen, and so wet her arousal was on her thighs. He placed his palm on the crease of her thigh, licking his lip as he stretched to toy with her engorged clit. Her grip moved to his shoulder as she jerked up into his touch. He nuzzled her sternum as he continued, rapidly moving the pad of his thumb back and forth over the sensitive nub. The motions of her pelvis quickened, matching his fervor. But as his lips began to trail down to her abdomen, she stopped him. "I want to come with you in me."
After gathering himself, he stood and slipped out of his trousers and briefs. He bent to pick them up and put them on the bed, and she hopped off the vanity and turned around. It confused him at first. But then she braced herself on the table with her forearms. “Come on,” she whispered.
The sight of her bowed over like that, asking him to fill her, was undeniably arousing. But this was something new. They'd been exploring gradually. Despite his complete trust in her, he had to question it. “It’s- It’s hard to see you this way. Your face.”
“That’s what the mirror’s for.” Her eyes were wicked when they met his in the glass.
Ah. He chuckled, feeling silly for not knowing that. Then she pressed back, the swell of her buttocks nudging his hard-on. When she held herself open for him, he stopped doubting. Letting the clutch of her walls and her soft moans guide him, he slowly entered her.
When he was engulfed in her completely, he stilled and gazed at the mirror. The reflection made him snort - his greasepaint was smeared all over, the white, red, and blue smudged together inseparably, much like their two bodies. It was odd to see himself standing there - he wasn't sure if he liked it. So he blinked down at her face; he held his breath. He hadn’t even done anything, and she looked like she was about to get off. Then he felt the flicker of her fingertips on his cock. Reaching around her and between her legs, he said, “Let me.” She obliged, allowing him to entwine their fingers as she stroked herself.
Her words came out as a whimper. “Arthur...” She pushed towards him. “I need you to move.”
Eagerly, he withdrew and bucked into her, grunting and quickly speeding up. But he was too clumsy and slipped out of her. They both laughed as she grasped him and lined him up with her entrance. “Just go easy,” she said. “Don’t pull out too far.” Concentrating, he put his other hand on her hip and did his best to control the shallow rocking of his hips. The one or two inches of friction wasn’t enough for him; it seemed to be working for her, though. But it was hard to maintain his rhythm when the sound of her ass and thighs hitting him was making him want to lose himself completely.
Releasing her hand, he straightened a bit and allowed his gaze to rove over her. She was writhing beneath him, bent forward as she chased her pleasure. His touch ghosted up her spine, gentle along the faint knobs (much less prominent than his) under her smooth skin. Kneading her left shoulder, he looked at her reflection. Her head was tilted back, her brows stitched together as she strove back towards him. The lips he loved to kiss parted with every whine. And her breasts swayed with each thrust, their stiff peaks grazing the surface of the table.
A groan escaped him. He’d seen her expression contort in bliss a lot at this point. But it felt voyeuristic, watching her like this. Almost as if the mirror separated them in spite of their joining. A shiver went up him at the thrill of it, and he plunged faster, his palm on her side pulling her towards him. She met him, move for move, even as her hips stuttered, and he felt the familiar spasm of her muscles start around him. He drove inside her, hard, when she fell apart, and stayed buried deep while she rode out her climax. It wasn’t easy to do, the pulsing grip of her core nearly inducing him to move. She sobbed, her frame curling as she lowered her head to her vanity. Gasping, she squeezed his hand on her shoulder. The trembling of her legs caught his attention, so he rubbed her thigh soothingly and kissed her.
Once she’d relaxed, he left her body long enough to turn her around, set her on the table, and fill her again. Now he wasn’t patient. His lips devoured her mouth as he rutted within her, her walls around his hard cock flooding his senses. He hoped he’d never get use to this. At the building tautness of his muscles, he propped himself up on the vanity and grit his teeth. One of her hands held his hip, the other digging the small of his back, guiding him as he fucked her with abandon. “Arthur, don’t stop."
His movements faltered when her legs encircled his waist, then sudden, white hot fire consumed him. Everything disappeared as he moaned in the crook of her neck - everything that wasn't her. She gripped him tightly, her soft "Yes" caressing his ear and his heart. His toes curled into the carpet and his pelvis locked with hers, his essence pouring inside her, his length throbbing, surrounded by her heat.
Finally, he was able to straighten and catch his breath. He could feel her smile against his temple, and he patted her flank gently before he withdrew from her. First he sat on the edge of the bed, then let himself lay down and raked his fingers through his hair, closing his eyes. That had been intense. And a work out. He could feel the sweat on his scalp. He’d have to shower again.
He hadn’t realized Y/N had stepped out until she reclined next to him and pressed a warm washcloth to his forehead. “Sorry about your make-up.”
“I think I can forgive you,” he laughed. His fingertips dragged up her side as he looked at her washed face in wonder. The gentle way she was dabbing at him, the love she radiated, would never stop being remarkable. This was one of the moments she made him believe he was the luckiest man in Gotham, despite the wretchedness that had been most of his life, and the conditions he struggled with.
Arthur accepted the cloth from her and sat up, watching as she stood and washed the vanity's surface. “Did you like it?” she asked.
“Yes.” He wiped the greasepaint from his skin. “Were you always like this?”
Y/N glanced over her shoulder. “Like what?”
Unsure how to describe it, he gestured at her vaguely.  “I dunno. Out there?”
"Out there?" she snorted. "I think you mean vocal." With a shake of her head, she knelt in front of him and rested her forearms on his knees. “That came with experience. And you may not be. That's fine. You'll figure it out.” Then she nuzzled at his nose. “It helps when you're with the right person.”
His chest swelled at that description of him, that she regarded him as such, and he put his arm around her. “Yeah,” he said quietly. Then he quirked a brow at her, touching the marks his paint had left on her chest. “Does this mean you have a thing for clowns?”
The tickling of his ribs wasn’t entirely unexpected. “No." She nestled against him and kissed his jaw. "I have a thing for you.”
~~~~~
Tag list (Let me know if you want to be added!): @harmonioussolve @ithinkimaperson @sweet-nothings04 @stephieraptorr @rommies @fallenstarsabyss @gruffle1 @octopus-plasma
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kertneyk · 3 years
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Cute Delivery Boys
When you finally make it home, you are exhausted.  Another long day, the paperwork for the academy took ages.  Then you had to talk to everyone who had the monster route ahead of you and get the lowdown and map it out.  Then the chief had you running all sorts of other in-office errands.  Just because he knew you hated it.  But the worst part of it was, you didn’t get to eat properly.  You looked at the clock. 7:00.   It wasn’t too late to make something, but you didn’t have any meat thawed out.  And with as hungry as you were, you needed to induldge your carnivorous side tonight.  Which would mean a trip to the store.
Or you could order in.  You went to your wallet and took out the coupons Muffet gave you.  One was buy one get one coupons for a burger and fry combo, the other was a free meal, delivery fee included; just pay tip. You look in your wallet folds, you had enough a good sized tip. And Chief Johnson did give you the weekend to integrate yourself in the monster community.  What better way than by spending money?  You try to talk yourself into the extravagence, you were supposed to be on a ramen diet afterall.  But it isn’t nearly as difficult as you pretended it was.  You are already pulling out your phone and dialing the phone number.  
You really were not great with money.  
You go down to the hallway closet and start pulling out some boxes while the phone rings.  A very bored sounding man answers.
“This is Grillbys.  Wha’ya want?”  Ok....
“Um, you do delivery right?”
“Ya.”
“Ok, uh.”  You think about what you actually want for a moment.  “Triple cheese burger, extra onions, no mustard and a large order of chili fries. And load those babies up with cheese.”
“Tha it?”
“Yeah, I got a coupon for a free meal.  You want me to read the code off the back, or just give it to the driver?”
“Read the code.”  You read off your numbers.
“Ok, that’s it.”
“Sure. The address?” You rattle off your address for the guy.
“Oh! I’ll need to buzz the delivery guy in, but intercom is busted, so you’ll need to give them my number.”
“You gonna to be one of those pain’n tha ass people ar’ncha?”  You laugh at his boldness.  You really weren’t trying to make his night difficult.  
“Not trying to I swear!  But since you are gonna call me out like that, I better live up to it. Make sure to send your cutest delivery boy.  Only cute guys get my number.”
“Sure thing sweetheart.”  He chuckles and you hear the line click.  You shake your head.  Yeah, monsters were going to give you a hard time starting Monday.  Until then, might as well enjoy it.  You wonder mildly if they were really going to send a cute monster to you.  And if so, would you find them cute?  Do monsters have a standard of beauty comparable to humans?  Guess you’ll find out.  You go grab a shower and change into some comfier clothes.  Going for a pair of shorts and tank top.  You then gather up your boxes and take them to the living room.
your cell phone starts ringing.  You smirk when you see the unknown number.  Must be your cute delivery boy!
“Yello, this is y/n.”
“Yah, got’a delivery from Grillbys fer ya.”  You are surprised by how deep the voice is on the line.  You said cute delivery boy, not ‘biker gang, don’t bring him home to meet your mama’ delivery boy.  Oh well, you buzz him in.
“K, I buzzed you. See you in a sec.” Click.  When you hear him finally knock on your door, you grab your wallet.  You only had a twenty in there, but that was fine.  It was a little excessive for a delivery tip on a burger and some fries, but since monsters couldn’t drive yet he probably had to take the bus.  That would have sucked.  
What greeted you when you opened your door was defintely not what you were expecting.  
The monster in front of you was short.  Like shorter than you short.  He stood at about 4’6”.  He was a skeleton, like GTP; but that was where the similarities stopped.  Besides being short, the guy had a row of sharp, shark-like teeth with a golden fang on one side.  His dark eye sockets glowed with the light of two pin pricks of red that made up his pupils.  His head was round where GTP’s what more square and sharp.  And the guy liked his red.  His coat, a fur-lined hooded thing was black and red, he wore a red turtle-neck and his shorts were black with a single red stripe down the side.  
The thing you noticed most about the delivery boy, however, had little to do with his appearance.  His magic was blinding in its power.  Out of all the monsters you’d met so far, this guy was easily the strongest!  
Your shock must have shown on your face because he coughed to get your attention.  
“see sometin ya like sweetheart?” His flirt was half-hearted and obviously not meant.  In fact, he seemed almost disgusted with himself for even attempting it.  
Ok, he was pretty cute.  
“Heh, well yeah. I said ‘cute delivery boy.’ Glad to see Grillby is a man of his word.”  You wink at him and watch his face erupt in a crimson blush. Blushing bones are totally a thing you guess.  Two out of two skeletons can do it.  
“W-wha! Wha ta fuck is wrong witcha? Don’t fuckin say shit like that.” He growls at you and shoves a bag between you two.  “Here, take yer fuckin food so I can go.”  
“But what if I don’t want you to go?  Not every day a handsome stranger knocks on my door.” You say as you dodge the bag.  
“Not my problem yer an ugly human.  Can’t even attract yer own kind.” He tries again, and again you manage to not take it.  
“Dude, that’s so harsh!” You clutch at your heart, “You gotta be nicer to ladies. We are delicate.”
“Yer a pain in the ass is whatcha are.  Take yer damn food.”  He growls at you, getting extremely frustrated.  
“Not until you go back to calling me sweetheart.  You’re really hurting my ego.”
“I don’t give a shit, sweetheart.” The word dripping in sarcasm.  Obviously, he finds you less than sweet. He finally manages to shove the bag into your hand.  
“Alright, alright.  You win.” You chuckle a bit and he relaxes, seeing an end to his ordeal. “Here, hold this so I can get your tip.”  You wave your wallet and hand the bag back to him.  It takes him a second before he realizes what just happened.
“Fuck!”  You cackle, picking on poor delivery boys should be beneath you.  But no one ever said you were a mature adult.
“Oh come on, don’t be sore.  That was good.  And I really did need an extra hand to take out the cash.”  You laugh some and take the bag, handing over the twenty after.  You notice in his other hand he has another bag.  Must be his next stop.  His face is still red as he shoves the bill in his coat pocket and stomps off. You lean out your door and wave goodbye to his back.
“Farewell oh adorable stranger.  May our paths cross again!”  He flips you off then vanishes down the stairs.  He was cute.  But really rude.  And definitely a more accurate representation of the troubles you will be having interacting with monsters in the future.  Of course, he might have been more receptive to your charms if you hadn’t looked at him like that.  He was probably sick of people looking at him like a sideshow attraction.  You decide that if you ever see him again, you would definitely be nicer.  And look at him less.  
Sans POV
Oh Sans was going to let Grillby have it next time he went in!  Who sends Sans the Skeleton to play delivery boy with a fuckin pervert human?  Cute! She said he was cute!  Lying shit bag human!  Skeletons weren’t fuckin cute.  
And so fucking bold too!  Most people avert their eyes when they are caught staring at him.  Oh no! Not this bitch.  When he called you out, he just made it worse! He fumes as he thinks about it.  
He takes the turn around your apartment building and then shortcuts back home.  He kicks his shoes off in the entryway and slams the bag on the table.  
He should have known Grillby was up to no good when he brought Sans a bag of free food.  He had been nursing a bottle of mustard, unable to afford his usual tonight.  Boss had cracked down on what money Sans was allowed to carry, and Grillz had closed out his tab when they all came up to the surface.  So when Grillz said all Sans had to do was deliver a burger to a dumb human, and he would even get to keep the tip, Sans said sure.  It was just one human.  Well, never again.  He was never do any more shitty fucking deliveries for shitty fucking humans.  He is interupted from his thoughts by his phone.  That was odd, Boss was havin another cooking competition at Undyne’s.  Hopefully they weren’t asking him to come and judge.  He shudders as he checks the message.  
Unknown: Hey, this is the girl you just delivered to.  I was rude, sorry.  
BZZT
Unknown: Question though?  Did I insult your boss when I ordered my burger no mustard?  Cause.... it looks like I did.
BZZT
Unknown: Seriously, it looks like I have a hit out on me from a mustard loving monster mafia.
The next text is a picture of his regular.  A burger and fries, everything absolutely covered in mustard.  Shit! He grabs the bag on the table and rips it open.  The fries in this bag coated in chili and cheese.  He gave her the wrong bag! Tch, not his problem.  He could always scrap off the chili and he has mustard here he could put on his own burger.  
BZZT
Unknown: It’s everywhere! Oh god, the poor burger, it’s bleeding mustard.
BZZT
Unknown: This is downright disrespectful.
Another picture of the burger, but with a little handwritten RIP sign held above it.  He can’t help but snicker a little.  
Sans: wrong bag. deal with it
BZZT
Unknown: Oh good, you can get texts.  I was worried for a second that I was texting the void.
BZZT
Unknown: I did see you had another bag in your hand.  Could I meet you somewhere to swap?  I was really excited about the chili on my fries.
Sans: no learn 2 like mustard
BZZT
Unknown: Dude, that is cold.  
BZZT
Unknown: Cold like the corpse of this mustard burger.  Is it even a burger?  All I see is mustard.
BZZT
Unknown: Please save me from condiment hell!  
Sans: why should i
BZZT
Unknown: Besides the fact that you would be helping a beautiful stranger?
BZZT
Unknown: Kidding! Don’t answer that.  My ego probably couldn’t take whatever terrible response you were writing.
BZZT
Unknown: I am officially out of cash now, but I would owe you one.  I really don’t want to have to call  back to the restaruant.  
Sans palms his face, sighing loudly.  It wouldn’t take much to go back and exchange the bags.  And Grillby would probably charge him for the burger if he had to make another. He reads the last message again, smirking as he does.  You said you would ‘owe him one’ it would be nice to have a human owe him something for a change.  Make you do something embarrassing.  Or maybe just make you go to Grillbys yourself.  See how you like it when everyone stares at you.
Sans: fine. U owe me. ur place couple min
BZZT
Unknown: YAS! I shall await your return!
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savenysublets · 3 years
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Car Hire In Bali - Seven Tips To Consider
Why Bali is always become one of the most popular tourist destination in the World? Beautiful nature, friendly people with their unique culture, warm white sand beaches and almost everything that tourist want are available on this island. And this is precisely the reason why Bali is easily accessible from any part of the world, with most of its visitors arriving by air.  Almost all major airlines serve flight routes to and from Bali, and almost all international airports in the world offer discounted ticket prices, almost every day.  
Once in Bali, the best way to explore this country is by hiring a car, which can really open up your travel horizons and let you explore some untouched and undiscovered locales.  Fulfill your desire to enjoy the picturesque countryside on almost at the entire Bali island by driving away from the bustling beach scene, a few kilometers inland. Enjoy a trip down the winding country roads while enjoying the beauty of the lush green carpeted mountainside, the village with its ancient traditions, the temple on the hillside and the beautiful places on the island as well as medieval relics. Planning is essential if you want your trip to be easy and smooth. So car hire is indeed the most realistic option for you.  
Some of the tips on the Do's and Don'ts of renting a car in Bali below might be help.  
1. Plan in advance:  
Careful planning is important to avoid getting stuck at the airport without knowing how to find your hotel and how to get around the island. Indeed, there are many transportation options that are ready to serve you at the airport, but to choose the one that suits your needs will definitely take up the most of your time. Plus, you also have to avoid in getting stuck with unreasonable price quotes with additional hidden costs then you will be given an unreliable car that is usually done by unscrupulous car rental service providers. Book a car to a trusted car hire service to avoid that matter. Avoid stress on your vacation by knowing the car hire services available in the area you are going to visit by doing research online beforehand. In deciding which car rental company to choose during the holidays, real consumer reviews and experiences will help a lot. To get a good price while on your vacation, negotiate for discount or reduction in price.  
2. Car booking tips:  
Compare and contrast the offers that provided by the car hire companies carefully after getting the quotes online. The comparisons matters of these companies are rental rates, mileage, car pick-up and delivery points, insurance coverage, car type and other parameters. If you book the car again every time you reach your next destination, it will probably cost you more than if you chose a more economical package (such as if you are traveling to more than one place in an area) which offered by several companies. You will get better vacations package rates as well as car rental services that are offered by some of the most popular travel agencies if you entrust all your vacation arrangements to them. Also, always keep a printed copy of your confirmation with you while traveling to avoid any last moment confusions.  
3. Pay attention to the hidden cost:  
Sometimes the car rental companies don't include some additional fees in their quote, such as the additional fees you will have to pay if you select a drop-off and / or pick-up area outside of their coverage areas. Make sure you confirm your booking after your doubts are gone about all the terms that you don't understand. You could be charged extra if you ask for a car topped with fuel, or don't return the car with a full tank and these charges could be way more than that at the gas station.  
Additional costs for insurance will also be charged to you if you want the car you'll hire to be covered by insurance. Rental rates that include insurance coverage are offered by several companies, but usually additional insurance costs are charged by most companies.  
Also sometimes your banks offer some kind of insurance policies if you use their services elsewhere, so check if car insurance is one of them. You might not need an additional insurance at all!  
4. Mileage:  
A certain number of mileage excess may be tolerated but there will be a fee for the rest, while unlimited mileage is also offered by several car rental companies. The choice is in your hand.  
5. Taxes:  
Depending on where from you hire a car, you could be charged additional taxes.  It is wise to ask your car rental service provider to explain whether this additional cost is included in the rate offered or not.  
6. Time:  
Most of the car rental companies available in Bali are apply 24 hour based but there several of them which are utilize day and date based. An half hour delay in returning the car from the specified time / hour will result additional rental fees for the next 24 hours, be careful in coordinating the return time to avoid unnecessary additional charges. Also, always remember that hiring a car for the entire week is often cheaper than five days!!  
7. Car Size/Type:  
Economy, family, full size 2/4-door, within your budget and luxury are the common vehicle classes that most car rental dealers offer to their customers. In general, these cars are equipped with power steering, air conditioning and radio, which are the standard equipment for car rental. Rent a car that accommodates you the best; a small car is enough for a small family of 4 while one would need to opt for a MPV for more than 5 grown ups.  Sometimes you'll get a free upgrade, and you'll always save on the quoted price.  
There are so many trusted Bali car hires and offer good prices with good service on the island, even if you need a driver to make your trip easier, they will be happy to prepare one.  
Before completing your booking, be sure to read carefully all the terms and conditions, policies and others that are provided by the company concerned, regardless of what your vacation plans are, understand all the details of your car rental at Bali.
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25 Home Restoration Mistakes That Way Too Many New Homeowners Make
The app asks you to input the area of your framework to ensure that all dimensions are accurate. It additionally uses colors as well as appearances to aid you develop a 3D representation of what you intend to construct. Armstrong Design Equipment Armstrong's Design Equipment allows you pick any room in a fictional home, and also mix and match potential wall shades, floor covering, trim, and also countertops. You'll average $19,850 back if you sell, a recover rate of 86.4 percent. Return prices exceed 100 percent in large cities fresh York City, San Francisco, Orlando, Seattle as well as Washington, D.C. Add electrical outlets for your computer and also recessed lights. Kitchen area closets or bookshelves organize the room above your desk. Use a roller to paint the paneling and a brush to smooth of the paint that puddles in paneling grooves. Transforming a 12x12 perk space into a home office expenses generally $13,143 and also generates $9,569 at closing.
" A lot of. customers do not want to hear those words," says Paul Irwin, design supervisor with Landis Construction, in the Washington, D.C., area, "yet it truly requires to be taken into consideration on major remodels.
With time as well as perseverance, you will have a magnificently landscaped yard.
Creating a new front access adds aesthetic appeal to your property and also enhances the value of your home if you choose to cost a later date.
Roll a sealant on natural flagstones for an irreversible damp appearance that boosts the color.
Instead, we're checking out something a lot more extensive here. Get the most recent This Old House news, trusted tips, techniques, and also DIY Smarts jobs from our professionals-- straight to your inbox. If you're doing your very own task, lower your materials-delivery fees by picking up items yourself. For around $400, you can purchase a virtually new single-axle utility trailer online, which you can tow behind your SUV. Obtain one just huge sufficient to bring 4-by-8 sheet items flat. Just make certain to review the small print and acquire the brands that are top-of-the-line as well as eliminate easily. Homeowners battle to decide what style would suit the space best, leading them to quit and leave the home windows bare or simply install easy blinds for privacy.Here's things-- windows ask to be dressed! By leaving your windows bare, you are missing out on a whole incredible layer of decorating. While those that are fortunate enough to take pleasure in ocean or mountain views may argue this reality, however even the most effective of sights might be framed by elegant home window panels. Households today live in a different way than they did thirty years back. The modern family members needs a more open planconcept as well as by opening areas, like the kitchen, enables family members ahead with each other. This normally entails eliminating walls as well as in some cases perhaps transferring the kitchen area to a brand-new place.
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Do you wish to vacate while the remodel is underway or will you try to live in your home, rather? If you make a decision to remain at home, you'll learn more about your service provider and also their staff effectively because they'll be at your house first thing every morning. Burst out your inspiration notebooks and Pinterest boards! It can be shown in paint shades, flooring, trim information and equipment.
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ask-de-writer · 4 years
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THE TAIL OF THE GHOST : Tales to Read AFTER the Lights Are OUT! : (1 part)
Return to the Master Story Index Return to MLP Fan Fiction Return to TALES TO READ AFTER THE LIGHTS ARE OUT!
THE TAIL OF THE GHOST
by De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)
2317 words
© 2016 by Glen Ten-Eyck Writing begun 10/30/16
All rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author. ////////////// Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information remains intact.  They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions. All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.
///////////////////////
He awoke to the almost feathery sensation of tail hairs flirting softly across his face.  Again.  The soft, sweet voice of the young mare offered, “Up, Old Warrior!  It is time for us to battle another night away!”
Opening one eye, the Old Warrior beheld two things.  One, the young mare was right.  The sun was setting.  Time for him to get up and fry a few hay twists for breakfast.
The other was a bit more awkward to see.  The young mare herself.  Other than the fact that her mane and tail were darker than the fur that covered the rest of her, there was simply not much to be seen.  Her outlines were slightly hazy and he could see the wall mount with his old battle honors and medals right through her.
Years ago, needing to reduce the size of a peacetime army, Master Sargent Warrin had been mustered out for his age and infirmity.  Some Infirmity.  True, he was missing the tip joint of his right wing.  That had failed to slow him down any.  Only dumb headquarters brass saw it as an infirmity.
When mustered out, Master Sargent Warrin had got from his forward post in the forest to Fort Everfree Edge faster than the overweight but “fit” pegasus Lieutenant that had delivered his Orders.  The scene that followed had got “insolence” added to his mustering out Orders.
All that he had done, after all, was point out to Base Commander Morrgripe that the UNFIT pony that they were mustering out could out run, out fly and carry a heavier battle pack in the air or on foot than ANY officer in the Fort.  That might have been bad enough, but the 950 golden bits that he had won while proving it, including a bet from the BC, had earned him the insolent tag.
Then the Prance border heated up a few years later.  For the fourth time!  They tried to get him to sign a forced reenlistment.
He had taken great pleasure in rubbing the Infirmity Muster Out in their faces!  At that time he was employed flying express post for Princess Luna’s Royal Road Commission.  AND had racked up SIX commendations for his swift deliveries!
He was smiling as he looked up at his second wall mount.  The commendations for swift post and two of Luna’s Crescents for gallantry in dealing with deadly civil emergencies were in it.
The sweet little mare poked her head through the wall near the stove where he was seasoning his frying hay twists with assorted dried flower tops.
With not a care in the world, she walked on into the kitchen, hooves about 10 cm above the floor.  “Smells lovely, Old Warrior.  I wish that I could eat some along with you.  That is something that I miss a lot.
“Until you came, ponies that stayed here at this old chateau were afraid of me.  I just saw you smiling.  Was it remembering your Insolence or was it the Fast Post Service that you were remembering?”
He looked up and offered her a small plate of his seasoned hay twist.  “It was a little of all three things, Sweetie.  The third being you, of course.  Mostly you.
“Here, this plate is yours for now.  If you cannot eat what I cooked for you, at least you can smell it and share breakfast with me that way.”
Her eyes twinkling, the little mare, Sweetie, sat.  On the air.  And sniffed appreciatively.  He poured her a small cup of the strong Rom black tea that he favored.  She smelled that too, a blissfully happy expression on her face.
He watched in fascination as she reached out a hoof and the day’s mail appeared in the same ghostly form as herself.  When she took back her hoof, all of his day’s mail was solidly there on the table.  She seemed to be pleased at his expression.
He sorted his mail and made a sour expression when he opened one with the Army Retirement Board seal on it.  He brightened considerably at the contents of a different envelope  It bore the seal of Chancery Court of Princess Luna’s Royal Road Commission.
“I have to go down to Everfree Town, Sweetie.  I wish that you could come with me.  I enjoy your company.”
She smiled like a conjurer doing a clever slight of hoof trick.  “I can.  I have followed you to your garden that is in the glen.  Because it was daylight, you could not see me but I was there.  I am hard to see in bright lamplight too.  That does not stop me from seeing you, only you from seeing me.”
“I thought that you were haunting this chateau.”
“I was.  Then you came.  You were not afraid of me.  You even started waking at sunset and spending the night awake, just so that you could see me and talk to me.
“It took some time for me to learn how to talk to you so that you could hear me.  Nobody else can hear me at all.  I love being able to talk to you.  The stories that you tell me of your adventures are endlessly fascinating.  I especially like the one about your meeting Princess Luna on the Prance frontier.”
The ex Master Sargent Warrin grinned!  “You learned how to move real things and that led you to writing too!  I must say that I admire your determination.  I would have loved to have you in a platoon of mine!
“Now, let’s go to Equesrian National Bank and try to settle this business!”
Sweetie smiled happily, “I love going out with you!  What is Equestrian National Bank?”
Bemused, the old warrior paused in the doorway and looked over at Sweetie, who was simply strolling through the wall of the chateau.  There was no porch under her but she did not seem to notice that.
He mused, “Forgot how long ago you died, Sweetie.  A bank is a business that takes money from many ponies and then loans it out to businesses, farms and home buyers.  They make money off of the loans and then share some of what they make with the ponies they got the money from.
“Usually, everypony sort of wins.  While they hold my money, they keep track of how much I have and add on my share of what they earn with it.”
Sweetie had no wings but she easily kept pace with him, seeming to trot along like a pegasus on a well made cloud.  Except, of course, there was no cloud!
With a luminous smile she explained, “I have managed to change from haunting the chateau to haunting YOU!  That means that I HAVE to stay close!  That makes it easy to keep up.  The magic of haunting and all of that.”
He flew with happy strokes of powerful wings.  She trotted ahead and flirted her ghostly tail in his face sometimes!  It made him get a goofy smile on his face every time that she did it.  He spiraled down to the Equestrian National Bank and walked in.
He requested a meeting with Mister Horshiz, the branch Vice President of Operations.  Instead of having to wait, Mister Horshiz, a really sour gray maned red pony, demanded, “There you are, Warrin!  Why are you six days late on the rent for the Royalmont Chateau?  You owe us 1500 golden bits plus six days of penalties!”
Warrin looked askance at him.  “Not possible.  I was PURCHASING the chateau from Princess Luna, who owned it.  There is a title deed transfer that my agent told me has been delayed.  My making the purchase was the Princess’ idea.”
“I have the DEED right here!”
Horshiz held out a blue scrolled edge document.  Warrin’s battle trained reflexes snatched it faster that Horshiz could pull it back.  His eyebrows rose at what he saw.
In a saccharine voice he asked, “Where is the original?  This is a Chancery Copy and it has been altered.  The Royal Seal is a copy, not an original, as required by Crowns Law.”
“That is a trivial detail!  Pay the past due rent and penalties or be evicted at once!” Horshiz demanded.
Sweetie’s voice caught Warrin’s attention.  “Keep him talking love of mine.  I see some very interesting things in this file on his desk!”
Warrin grinned like a shark seeing a helpless swimmer.  “When Princess Luna’s personal property deed was so severely delayed in transfer, I wrote to her.”
He held up his envelope with the seal of the Royal Road Chancery Court on it.  He read, “Dear Master Sargent (Ret.) Warrin:  It is with great pleasure that I enclose your latest Royal Road Fast Post Commendation for assistance in the recent Dappleton Grist Mill dam failure.
“In spite of your Retirement from our Postal Service, your heroic over flight in thunderstorm weather and precise damage assessments made all of the difference for some hundreds of our subjects.
“In response to your request for an audit of the title problem concerning the Royalmont Chateau, I have disturbing news.  The Title Deed was sent to the Everfree Town branch of Equestrian National Bank to have the deed transfer to you notarized and the transfer registered.
“Celestia and I jointly agreed, after the Dappleton disaster, to gift the Chateau to you for your many services to our Realm.  Along with the deed, all needful fees and a full refund of all the monies that you have paid were sent to the Bank.
“The deed, fees and refund were directly stolen.  A Royal Audit has shown other irregularities concerning your accounts at the Everfree EQNB.  Among these, your retirement payments from both Our Army and the Royal Road Post System have subverted.  The direct golden transfers on the Royal Treasury are being made to Everfree EQNB.  They are issuing DRAFTS, which they fail to pay until thirty days have passed, giving them unlawful access to the use of your honorable retirement funds.
“The whole scheme has been directly traced to General  Morrgripe of Fort Everfree, who appears to have a grudge against you concerning how your took your Muster Out.  Something about losing a bet.
“I may add that due to My personal friendship, stemming from your heroic shielding of my person with your body during a surprise attack by Prance forces, it was my request that you be kept in our Royal Armored Pegassi.  However, in the end, such decisions do properly belong to the Base Commander.  Then Colonel Morrgripe ordered you Mustered Out.
“I will never forget that you lost your right wing tip when protecting me during the Third Prance Incursion.  
“Both General Morrgripe and Branch Vice President Horshiz have been summoned to Our Royal Court to answer charges Under Our Royal Wing, concerning the theft of My personal property and gift.  They must also face the subversion of our Royal Retirement System.
“Please find enclosed a fully transferred Title Deed formally Sealed by both my sister Celestia and I.  This Deed supersedes any previous documents and is already Registered in all of the appropriate Courts of Law.
“I remain your loyal friend, Princess Luna.”
While Warrin was reading, he noticed with amusement that he could, just barely, see Sweetie.  She was laying her hoof on documents from the file on Horshiz’s desk.  Like when she picked up his mail at home, the documents faded slowly away while Sweetie grinned.
For his ears alone, she said, “We called them Sharing Associations when I was alive.  Losing needed documents is still a favorite ploy, I see.  He is losing some that he will wish that he still had!”
Warrin grinned even more widely.  He held up his copy of the Chateau’s deed.  “You are effectively dead, except that you will be working on the Royal Roads!  This one is ALREADY registered by the direct order of BOTH Princesses.
“I was coming to let you know that both the payment by draft and the Deed issues had been taken care of.  I was going to let you off the hook on all of this and shaft General Morrgripe, whom I do detest.
“Unfortunately, you just had to try to extort a rent from me for a property that I own outright as a Royal gift.”
Sweetie strolled through Horshiz’s desk and laid her hoof just above Warrin’s lap.  A number of documents faded into existence in his lap.
She hugged him, which felt like being surrounded by the softest of feathers.
Whispering in Warrin’s ear, she said, “Come, my love, let us go to our home and leave this pony to his fate.”
Agreeing, Warrin stood, folding the documents into his shoulder pouch.  He turned to the stunned Horshiz, “I would love to see you try to claim either rent or eviction.  The first thing that the court will do is look to see who owns the property.  The Registry will show that it is ME.  That will make you prima facie guilty of fraud.  You know it, too.
“A pleasant evening to you.”
He stopped by the Police Station and delivered the documents that Sweetie had purloined.  He explained, “These are part of the evidence in a case Under the Royal Wing.”
He produced his letter from Princess Luna.  The desk pony checked his Wants, Warrants, and Summonses file to confirm the Royal Summons and took the documents, saying, “I will be see to getting these forwarded to the Royal Road Chancery Court.”  Shaking his head in disbelief he added, “Stealing from Princess Luna?  Not a wise thing to do!”
Warrin’s flight home to the Chateau was in no way hindered by Sweetie getting in front of him and flirting her tail in his face from time to time.
~THE END~
Return to the Master Story Index Return to MLP Fan Fiction Return to TALES TO READ AFTER THE LIGHTS ARE OUT!
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isugena99390 · 3 years
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Affiliate Marketing Tips - Don't Let Certain Affiliate Programs Intimidate You
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cbdexpressbyd · 3 years
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Everything You Need to Know About CBD’s Courier Services
Have you ever found yourself scrambling all over the place for a reliable courier service company? Don’t know who to call in the middle of the night when you have something urgent to be delivered? Have you ever been frustrated by the courier services you are getting right now?  
We can’t blame you. Reliable couriers are hard to find, but they are not completely non-existent. There are still courier companies in Australia that reach a high level of standard, and some even go above and beyond, like Couriers By Demand Express.  
Couriers By Demand Express has serviced many Aussies for many years. Over those years, they have built a steady reputation for quality and timely service. Still, there are still those that are unaware of the benefits of working with the company.  
No worries. This article will take you through the nitty-gritty of what it is like to work with Couriers By Demand Express. Here are all the things you need to know about Courier By Demand Express’ courier services and why you should make the switch today.  
What does courier service mean?
To appreciate everything that Couriers By Demand Express has to offer, one has to understand the basics of courier service first. Courier services are basically services that allow individuals to send parcels from one place to another. Courier services can cover areas from local and national to international levels.  
Traditional courier services were limited to ground or land routes. But with the advent of technology in the 20th century, sending parcels from across the world has been made easier thanks to jets and planes powerful enough to transport parcels from east to west. The evolution of courier services is one rife with rich history and progress. From horse-drawn carriages to the use of drones for door-to-door delivery in the near future, the industry has indeed come a long way.  
Couriers By Demand Express: The Most Reliable Courier Company in Australia
Here at Couriers By Demand Express (CBD), we haven’t got our hands on parcel-carrying drones just yet. But we believe in adapting to the times, and we certainly would not be opposed to the use of the latest tech (however unusual) if it means improving our courier services. Such is the guiding principle that made us one of the leading names in the industry.  
What exactly makes us a cut above the rest? There are many courier companies here in Australia, but CBD is among the very few who actually cares about more about the quality of the service over the quantity. This is just one of the many service features that you can experience when you work with us.  
You might have heard of horror stories about parcels just thrown to the back of a truck without care or concern despite the ‘Fragile’ label stuck as clear as day to some of them. Not to mention warehouses filled to the brim with disorganised parcels. You will never encounter such a mess with CBD.  
Such is the Couriers By Demand Express difference.  
The Difference Between a Courier and Parcel
But enough about us, and let’s move forward with more bits about courier services. If you are totally new to the terminologies in the industry, you might think that courier services are synonymous with parcel services. Though both aim to send packages from point A to B, the big difference is that parcel services deliver small individual packages to customers while courier services deliver more than just that.  
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Another difference is that parcel services are delivered at standard speed, while courier services treat deliveries with much more urgency. However, this difference in speed does affect the pricing as parcel services are significantly cheaper than its more speedy counterpart.  
If time is not a concern and if your budget is quite restricted, then going for parcel services is a sound choice. The quality of their delivery is not affected as much. But if the delivery calls for some urgency, then courier services will definitely be worth it.  
Courier services do not only cater to personal deliveries, but they also cater to bulk and heavy parcel orders from wholesalers or retailers alike. So, if you are running an online business, you will definitely find that a good working relationship with a trusted courier in Australia extremely beneficial.  
The confusion between the two is understandable. Many people get them mixed up since many courier services offer parcel services as well. The reverse, however, is not possible. Choosing the right service lies in the situation you are in, so choose wisely.
CBD: The Best Parcel Delivery Company in Australia
CBD prides itself with not only having a holistic parcel service, but we also have a widely-encompassing courier service that ranges from basic local deliveries to complex international freights. Running a courier service takes a lot of organisation and coordination — a lot of working parts involved, a lot of courier partners to work with — and we are happy to say that we have got those down to the tee.  
When you need us, we will be there for sure. But how do you know if you need a courier in Australia?  
When Do You Need a Courier in Australia
There are many instances when you will be needing assistance from delivery companies in Australia. But in this article, we are going to discuss then using two perspectives: from an individual and from a business owner.  
If you have a personal need...
If you are an individual looking for courier services that can deliver a personal parcel to a friend or family, then that is a good time to seek the assistance of a courier service provider. Another instance is when you need to return a damaged product to a seller. You can also get parcel services if you need to get important documents across states, to another university or institution for instance.  
If you have a business need...
If you are running a business, your delivery needs will differ greatly from the needs of a private individual. For instance, instead of delivering one parcel at a time, you might need to deliver multiple parcels in one go. In that case, you will need a courier service with an excellent bulk delivery system that can transport your parcels Australia-wide, or even internationally.  
Doing so costs more, but many delivery companies in Australia offer special rates for bulk deliveries. They are also keen on striking partnerships with businesses who can use their courier services, giving you another advantage.  
Do Courier Companies Deliver in Rural Areas?
Many couriers are restricted to delivering in urban areas since it is easier and less exhaustive on resources. Small area coverage such as city-only services is also much easier to manage. Some courier companies err on the safe side of the industry for fast profits and safer travels. But if you have a parcel that is bound for the rural outskirts, then you will need a courier partner that’s bold enough to go beyond.  
Here at Couriers By Demand Express, no place is too near or too far. With our courier services, customers can get their parcels anywhere they want – whether they wish to deliver within the confines of the city or towards the vast expanse of the great outback. Wherever the parcel takes us, we will deliver.  
Couriers By Demand Express Same-Day Courier Service
Another thing that you can find here at Couriers By Demand Express is our affordable same-day courier service. Unlike other courier in Australia, our same-day courier service will definitely not break the bank!  
We understand how important it is to have quality courier service that delivers parcels on schedule and intact, without the burden of a hefty price. We have all been there – lining up the long queue just to find out that you have to rake in another load of fees just to get your parcels across. Our process is far from the typical inconvenient booking journey.  
When you work with us, you simply have to fill out our online enquiry form. But if you want to speak with our friendly staff directly, you can always contact us through 02 9095 5000.  
Couriers By Demand Express Delivers to All Australia
As mentioned, there is no place in Australia that is too far or too near for us. If you want to have a parcel delivered, just give us an address and we will take it there in no time. We do not just say “your complete delivery solution” for nothing, after all.  
But perhaps the best thing about our service is that we are not just limited to delivering typical parcels. We have refrigerated transport services ready to deliver frozen goods and items at your beck and call. We also have a large fleet for hire if you want to take the delivery side of your business up a notch.  
Got no one to manage your fleet? No worries. We will take care of that as well. You do not have to go through the hassle of hiring a qualified fleet manager since we have excellent ones in our team already. When you get our fleet management service, you will not only get a well-maintained fleet but will also benefit from the supervision of an experienced fleet manager to keep them in tip-top shape as well.  
Your Courier Service Near You
Couriers By Demand Express is the ultimate courier service near you. Wanna know why? You do not even have to lift a foot out the door to have your parcels delivered. All you have to do is check our website and book our services online. No need to search for “courier services near me” because we can deliver wherever and whenever.  
If you are pressed for time, our delivery personnel will pick up your parcel right at your doorsteps. You don’t even need to leave your home to get quality services. Who knew that courier service could be this convenient?  
Conclusion
We hope you learned everything there is to know about Couriers By Demand Express through this article. From basic delivery to complicated fleet management services, we have got it all for you. But if you still have some burning questions that need answers, feel free to call us at 02 9095 5000.  
If you are ready to start your journey with Couriers By Demand Express today, then what are you waiting for? Book our services now!
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cindylouwho-2 · 4 years
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RECENT NEWS, RESOURCES & STUDIES, June 28 2020
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Welcome to my latest summary of recent ecommerce news, resources & studies including search, analytics, content marketing, social media & Etsy! This covers articles, podcasts, videos and infographics I came across since the late May report, although some may be older than that.
I am currently working on Etsy search testing and a few new blog posts and pages for my website, so it may be a few more weeks before I get a new report out. In the meantime, if you have an questions, comments or suggestions, please contact me here or on my website.  
TOP NEWS & ARTICLES 
Ecommerce sales are way up, but so are many costs, and delays in shipping are part of the problem. “...many of our merchants start preparing mid-year for peak-season volume, holidays. We’ve seen many merchants hitting and even exceeding their normal Black Friday and Cyber Monday volumes consistently through April, forcing them to adapt quickly for greater capacity.” UPS is charging high-volume customers a surcharge based on how much more they are shipping compared to normal times, and also for an increase in oversized packages. 
Mail delivery is still slow in many countries. Canada Post hit an all-time delivery record with 2.1 million parcels on May 19, but may finally be getting caught up. [article in French] Shipping between countries can also be substantially delayed, in part due to the lack of air traffic right now. USPS is using sea transport for packages to some European countries. And USPS rates are going up for international shipping in July, due to the new Universal Postal Union deal. "Anyone who is a bulk shipper, your rates are going up".
A reminder that the US economy isn't suddenly going to stabilize in the fall; it’s likely to crash. The US is now officially in a recession. Many people are not going to have money for a lot of discretionary spending. Furthermore, some categories of items will likely drop in price due to company closures, supply chain issues and bankruptcies. That will increase competition at the same time there are fewer buyers for many types of items. Ecommerce sales in the US are projected to rise 18% this year, but it won’t be enough to make up for the loss of brick & mortar retail sales. “The apparel and accessories category is typically the second-largest in e-commerce, for example, but will only grow 8.6% as consumers shift spending away from discretionary, non-essential purchases.”  Retail in the US is expected to be down more than 10% in 2020.
ETSY NEWS 
Etsy has released an addition to the iOS app that will allow shoppers to use augmented reality to see wall art on their home’s walls. The Verge was critical of how long it took for Etsy to catch up with the competition, and the fact that it is not available for Android yet. TechCrunch went into more detail. 
As mentioned last time, you can now add short, no-audio videos to your listings. Etsy is so big on this, they are offering listing credits and ad credits to sellers who upload 5 or more videos by July 6. As always, make sure you read the legal policies before you participate in this offer. 
The Etsy Design Awards are back, with submissions due by July 15th. Note that they are only open to 38 countries, for some reason. There is a forum discussion thread with tips, and a podcast [audio & transcript] with previous winners.
If you sell any items for kids, you will find this trending items article from Etsy useful. Searches including “kid,” “child,” or “baby” didn’t go up as much in April as one might have expected, given the pandemic shopping bump, but puzzles were popular. They include some search terms: for example, there was a “250% YoY increase in searches on Etsy containing “jump rope” in April. Also, “while school may look different this fall, we’re already seeing an increase for school-related searches compared to the same time last year.”
Face mask seller ZhenLinen was interviewed on NPR [text and audio] about mask selling, and was even asked about the offsite ads fees near the end. They sold 31,000 masks while their event-supply business was in pandemic limbo; most of those sales were through Etsy. The good news articles about mask sales, & suggesting Etsy as a source of masks, are continuing, although some do mention slow delivery times and even undelivered orders. By the way, if any mask sellers are looking for new places to sell, Facebook finally caught up and is now allowing mask sales, ads and other promotions. 
According to analysis of Etsy’s API data, May 2020 was Etsy’s best month ever. Remember that the API data misses things like sales of multiples, so it is not the most accurate source, but I don’t have any reason to doubt the statement is true. 
Etsy stock went over $100 for the first time, before dropping as the rest of the market went down. 
You have probably already seen Etsy’s statement on race issues after the recent murder in the US. “That’s why today we are announcing donations of $500,000 to the Equal Justice Initiative and $500,000 to Borealis Philanthropy’s Black-Led Movement Fund, as well as matching employee donations. We encourage our community to join us in supporting these important organizations.  Etsy is built on a belief that communities have the power to change the status quo. Change is hard-fought, and we are committed to this fight.“
If you have your real name on your Etsy account, don’t attract any attention from the police. 
SEO: GOOGLE & OTHER SEARCH ENGINES 
If you don’t really understand what algorithms are and how they work for search engines, you will want to get caught up here. Key to understanding: “An algorithm is not a formula.”
This is a bit advanced, but it’s a good explanation of how to figure out searcher intent in Google results, and then fulfill it with new content. [video, transcript, and downloadable form]
Linking from one page on your website to another can be an important part of SEO. It can also help you get more page views, if you link to new pages from your most popular pages. Creating internal site links on the same page through a table of contents [advanced, coding info] can even get you more links in Google search results. 
Speed on mobile devices is also a big part of SEO as well as conversions. “a 0.1 second improvement in site speed resulted in Retail conversions increases of 8.4% and average order value increases of 9.2%.”
Bing made changes to its backlink tool, including the ability to see your competition’s backlinks. The option is part of Bing’s Webmaster tools, & allows you to analyze “similar sites”. Their Webmaster Tools now can also analyze your site for SEO errors. 
A former Google employee is starting a new search engine, called Neeva. 
Some SEOs recommend removing “low-quality” pages from your site to improve your overall rankings, but low-quality doesn’t necessarily mean pages that few people visit [text & video]. And short posts are not necessarily “low-quality”. If your page is mostly duplicate content, it is like low quality, but just repeating a few lines on each page is not duplicate content. 
Google missed a few episodes of its Google search news YouTube post during the pandemic, but they were back on May 26 with an update. They’ve also finally released their webspam report for 2019. “we observed that more than 25 Billion pages we discover each day are spammy.”
Advanced content [video with multi-language subtitles, & text summary in English]: Google, JavaScript, & links. 
Shopify sites have built-in blogs,and those blogs can help you get sales through SEO. And while we are on Shopify SEO, here is some advice on fixing technical SEO issues on Shopify sites. [the second is advanced content unless you know some coding]
While having an author page isn’t a requirement on any news/blog site, it might be a good idea anyway [text and video]. Content that is useful for readers is ultimately good for your site’s SEO. 
Here is a history of Google’s PageRank, and what it still does for ranking. 
Did the Google May core update really mess up organic search relevance? Some people think so. [I had noticed the Wikipedia drop but thought it was just for a particular search.] There may be more ranking updates underway right now. 
Google plans on introducing user experience as part of the ranking algorithm, although it won’t happen before next year, and we will get 6 months warning. Search Engine Land lists the following elements: “whether the page loads quickly, if it’s mobile-friendly, runs on HTTPS, the presence of intrusive ads and if content jumps around as the page loads.” They add a bunch of technical advice, and the tools to follow up on it. 
Do you find SEO confusing? Don’t worry - even the pros working for big companies make huge errors. 
(CONTENT) MARKETING & SOCIAL MEDIA (includes blogging & emails) 
Updated infographic with the common social media image sizes used today. (Several of these get published yearly, because there are always changes.)
Is blogging still relevant? [TL;DR - yes] And if you want to write more interactive posts, here are some tools for that. 
Video app TikTok made a lot of money in April, but is seeing competition from a new short video app called Zynn, which allows users to make money by watching videos and bringing in new users. However, Zynn has already been removed from Google Play store amid accusations of content theft. Instagram has a challenger called “Reels”, and even YouTube wants some of that TikTok traffic, so they are introducing 15 second videos. Meanwhile, TikTok is coming under closer scrutiny for its invasive tracking. 
Every social network apparently needs to have their own version of Stories these days, so Pinterest has introduced a new version of Story Pins in the US. “Unlike Stories on other platforms, which are often self-focused snippets from someone’s life, Pinterest Stories Pins are designed as clickable content focused on sharing ideas. For example, Story Pins could offer a step-by-step guide to cooking a recipe or creating a craft project. A Story Pin could also offer ideas around how to reorganize your home office, keeping the kids entertained, beauty tutorials and more.”
Google appears to be imitating Pinterest with their new release, called “Keen”. You add items yourself but Google then attempts to find more things you are interested in, using AI. 
If you are looking for some new tools to help with Instagram, Social Media Today compiled a list of 5 recent ones. They include image processing, templates, and analytics. 
Twitter is beta-testing the ability to tweet sound files directly from the platform, instead of embedding links to other sites. The article notes that these may be more difficult to moderate than text tweets would be. 
Two of the three parts of this article cover local businesses, but the middle part has some promotional ideas that mostly involve content marketing & social media. Nothing groundbreaking, but a decent list if you are looking for new free ways to advertise.
ONLINE ADVERTISING (SEARCH ENGINES, SOCIAL MEDIA, & OTHERS) 
Semi-advanced - how to improve your Google Ads optimization score. 
GCLID is short for “Google Click Identifier” to help track ads and conversions. You can learn more here. [Understanding this is useful for both your own ad campaigns and understanding other ads, such as the Etsy Offsite Ads program.)
Money coming in from social media video ads has increased from the lows in April. Facebook ads have improved the most. 
New advertisers on Instagram will not necessarily have to link their accounts to Facebook any more. It may be linked to a campaign to “stop hate for profit” that calls for people to stop buying Facebook & Instagram ads during July, and which has attracted several big players such as Unilever and Verizon. Some companies are leaving all social media ads, or are extending the Facebook boycott until the end of the year. But as the first article points out, Zuckerberg’s complete control of voting means he can’t be turfed by a board just to protect profit, so a short boycott may not be the best way to get change. 
Facebook published a new explanation of how ads work on the platform. 
STATS, DATA, OTHER TRACKING 
For people who are new to Google Analytics: here are some things you should be tracking, as well as these, and some tips on finding source info for SEO work. If you want to improve your customers’ experience with the site, check out these tips. [There is some crossover between the 4 articles, but I think that those of you trying to learn more detailed examples of how GA works will find everything useful.]
What is a “session” in Google Analytics? This article includes screenshots & tips on changing their length. 
You can get great keyword data from the Google Search Console - here’s how. 
ECOMMERCE NEWS, IDEAS, TRENDS 
Online shopping has received a huge boost from the pandemic lockdowns, and big online marketplaces are now competing for new small businesses to fill the growing demand. Walmart outsold eBay in May, for the first time ever. Things are slowing down a bit, though: “buy-online-pick-up-in-store (BOPIS) had begun to “plateau.” BOPIS growth in May was 195% year over year, which was down from its April peak of more than 200%.”
Amazon is being criticized for allowing many prohibited items to be sold on the site, even through “fulfilled by Amazon”, so the items are stored in its warehouses. “Graham did not respond directly to many of our specific questions, including how many of the banned items that The Markup found had been sold, why the company had not noticed some of them for months, why some were listed as Amazon’s Choice, and why many were stored in Amazon’s warehouses for shipment. He did not respond at all to questions about why Amazon itself had offered banned items for sale. Most of the banned listings we reported to Amazon have been removed, although at least three have popped back up.” [emphasis added]
Amazon is now offering multi-channel fulfillment in the US; you don’t even need to use Fulfillment by Amazon to sign up. They’ve also introduced lines of credit for sellers, through a partnership with Goldman Sachs. 
eBay is rallying sellers to object to a proposed Louisiana law that would force marketplace sites to verify the identities of higher-volume sellers in the state. The law was passed anyway, and takes effect July 1. Here are the highlights of the new law.
Now-fired eBay employees harassed and stalked the EcommerceBytes owner and her husband for months after eBay’s CEO at the time said eBay needed to “take down” the site & its owner.
Walmart now has ThredUp as one of its third-party sellers on the Walmart website. They sell second-hand clothing and accessories for women & kids, often famous labels. Sales are all online but buyers will be able to return things to Walmart stores. 
Walmart has also partnered with Shopify, allowing small businesses to list directly on Walmart’s website through Shopify. This appears to be a limited initiative, as they only plan on including 1200 Shopify sellers by the end of 2020. Most analysts think this is a plan to compete with Amazon more directly. 
In addition to its existing website, Target is now offering items on Instagram Checkout. 
Shopify has been getting great media coverage lately, including this article suggesting them as an alternative to Amazon third-party selling, once the new “Shop” app gets some traction. 
BigCommerce has introduced drag-and-drop design tools for its website builder. 
Square has begun using rolling reserves to reduce its risk with some sellers. “In one instance, Legal Knock, a company that builds websites for law firms, told the Times that it never had a customer demand a refund for their work and yet Square kept $4,000 in reserve in May. Sean Weber, the owner, said he had trouble contacting the company and wasn't satisfied with its explanation. He even said Square blocked him on Twitter.”
Upcoming PayPal changes for US users include seller protection for some digital items, and not necessarily requiring buyers to return items to win a significantly not as described case. Remember that many PayPal changes start with the US and then expand to other countries; Canadian changes are here. 
BUSINESS & CONSUMER STUDIES, STATS & REPORTS; SOCIOLOGY & PSYCHOLOGY, CUSTOMER SERVICE 
When thinking about customer returns, remember that a lower-than-average return rate is not necessarily your top goal. “You may ask, “why would a merchant want to increase returns?” It’s because they’re using returns as a growth driver. They’ve figured out, for their respective businesses, that a higher rate of returns actually nets out to an increase in sales and repeat purchasing. So much so, that the overall uptick in business far outweighs the increased costs of more frequent returns.”
Consumers are reading reviews more than ever, but half of this study’s respondents said that “‘too many companies’ are creating fake reviews online.”
Many people are tired of the “things are different” ads that have predominated, & want to see more ads showing people getting back to normal. “The U.S., U.K. and the Netherlands are primed for a jump in fashion purchases, with significant percentages of consumers in those countries planning clothing purchases in the next 30 days. The finding suggests that fashion marketers may increase their marketing efforts to reach consumers who are ready to buy apparel as lockdowns are lifted.”
We don’t know what the holiday shopping season will look like this year, so ecommerce businesses should be planning for many different scenarios. 
Here’s an interesting overview of how some searches changed in the first few months of the pandemic. [infographic] And some of the shopping changes people made, especially Gen Z, may be permanent. “...younger consumers are shifting their habits faster than their older counterparts.” That report also states that “33% of these consumers have increased their online spending, for a net increase of 6%, versus 23% of consumers in older generations, or a net increase of 1%.”
Here’s more on the second-hand clothing trend that is hitting its boom years. “According to the report, secondhand goods are expected to make up 17% of a person’s share of closet space by 2029, up from just 3% in 2009.” Gen Z is a big user of Depop, which has a lot of altered and enhanced vintage clothing available. 
MISCELLANEOUS 
This article has inspired me to completely redo my website’s About page. Not yet, of course, but some day soon…
Speaking of websites, here’s a good list of dos & don’ts for a contact form.
eBay may be probing your computer when you visit, and that is not always legal. 
Free Zoom accounts can’t set up encrypted calls/meetings, because “the firm wants to keep this feature away from free users to work with law enforcement in case of the app’s misuse.”
Finally in privacy news, Google is being sued for still tracking you in various ways when you use Chrome’s incognito mode. 
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