#not the passionfruit mojitos part specifically

[mctreeleth]

It is so nice to know that drinking 4 passionfruit mojitos over the course of 5 hours can still give me such bad indigestion that I lay writhing in pain for 25 minutes, the fiery shooting through my torso, arms and shoulders so intense that, did I not know what was happening, would almost certainly be enough to make me call an ambulance.

#and when I say nice I mean the exact opposite of that #plus it always hits RIGHT after you make yourself another one #and after you have taken off your bra and eaten the half a pack of quick-eze and flopped dramatically back and forth on your bed #knowing full well that it will be over in 20 minutes but until then you must endure a truly overwhelming amount of pain #tossing up holding down the pain-induced waves of nausea or going and vomiting for a brief moment of feeling better #once that has passed looking at the delicious passionfruit mojito you made for yourself #unsure whether or not you can trust it #the worst thing is I am not even drunk #I could legally drive right now! #anyway it has passed I am fine this has been happening to me since I was a small child #not the passionfruit mojitos part specifically #but various pastries and donuts and for some inexplicable reason peanut butter on toast #it is a genetic condition us Lastnameredacteds all produce a lot a lot of stomach acid