#okay back to work on the games

[goldenpinof]

someone got caught

#dan and phil #daniel howell #amazingphil #phil lester #danandphilgames #dan and phil games #dnp gifs #dnpgames #my edits #Will Dan and Phil go back in the closet? #3:13 #okay i'm done. this isn't working. gonna go cry reading the news

[katabay]

ANDREY STAMATIN

Keep a close eye on Peter. You'd become desperate and turn into a villain without him.

I spend a lot of time thinking about daniil and peter, but something just clicked into place for me with andrey. so!

I am. currently untangling this thread of thoughts about the stamatin twins and daniil and this kind of. triangle that's happening. a three fold bullet for sure, the kind of recognition-awareness-understanding where three people become one, but to step back from that. when daniil and andrey talk, there's a specific shape of peter that stands in his conversational absence. so: triangle formation. it's opposite-adjacent-complementary to daniil and peter's conversations. it all goes back to that first conversation you have with andrey. it's giving knife. love it!

bsky ⭐ pixiv ⭐ pillowfort ⭐ cohost

#OBSESSED WITH HIM #like i was Intrigued by him but i think re reading girard made me go OH i understand you now #wild that i never connected dots between daniil 'Defeat Death' dankovsky and andrey 'Sentenced To Death In Four Countries' stamatin #the transgressive aspect to andrey was like. yeah buddy. you and daniil are reflections in that way of course. but now im like. #oh. okay! got it. #andrey was always harder for me to get a grasp on because i work better at analyzing character pairs but you cant do andrey #without some version of peter and that's three people (debatably four). thankfully. AW2 has me thinking thoughts about #characters in stacks of 5. so now i get to think new thoughts about this game #pathologic #andrey stamatin #shdhghgh classic patho dialogue with patho 2 character designs. i will do it again until we get the bachelor's route #ehdhghgh i wanted to talk about girard's triangle that's happening too but it's not quite. right. #because daniil is the mediator but the thing desired is an abstract-literal thing that all three of them are reaching for #but are unable to conceptualize without the other two in place #i'll get back to this thought later. but its like. the twin dialogue of pulling in opposite directions. but now 3 sides of the same coin #coherent recognition is achieved with. daniil. and also transformative violence as a catalyst.

[emry-stars-art]

Whumptober day 9: scar reveal/interrogation/presumed dead (full under the cut)

Find the royal au masterpost here

Abram thought he’d be just fine if the prince never so much as knew about this particular scar; luckily his fears are (as we all know) unfounded, and Andrew gets the chance to prove that he doesn’t think any less of him for it.

#this can’t be that long after he’s back #Abram’s still pretty fragile to make these assumptions about Andrew #he’s still weak and needs help #day and Andrew made sure there was a space sectioned off for the infirmary’s showers #since Abram can almost never be convinced to bathe #also pay no attention to the fact that like #medical tape wouldn’t exist yet #Abby is a miracle working alchemist okay #she’s my excuse for a lot here. 😅 #fan art #my art #aftg #all for the game #neil josten #andrew minyard #royal au #whumptober #emry whumptober 2023

[jils-things]

by the lighthouse.

dividers

#alright i suppose i should tell what's up lately! im mostly posting this like a mini update or whatever haha #so - since i made that last post on my disappearance i worked endlessly to finish my animation project and thank goodness it's finally over #i had to take a break from trying to be social here and just stay in my own space and i did that by having a smaller side blog to ramble #the project was very... tiring - definitely took out so much energy from me post physically and mentally and i was just frustrated everyday #so i just took my time to be alone with a few close people and i like to think im okay now? #i like to think so - since i was able to deliver a few commission drafts today so i'm relieved that im back to my usual pace #I'll post a few of my doodles here i did during my project just to fill the void haha #i've acquired a minor familial from another video game and i care for him a lot :] idk ill bother to talk abt it here but yeah thats funnn #also indulging a lil bit of t.n.m.n content as of late also thanks to my friend who knows abt it hehe #soo yeah! I don't know if ill be active like the usual but know that i'm doing alright now! hope everyone's doing okay too xoxo #ill probably still stay in my smaller blog for a little longer but will occasionally pop in here! #sooo yaaa #~ art #♥️ memoryshipping #also yea i think no.rton only had like. 10 days worth of being the blog brand here until i switched back to the usual guy lmaooo sorry 😔

[adammilligan]

when adam says "no, john winchester was some guy who took me to a baseball game once a year. i don't have a dad" like yes SIR get his ass

#i have so many thoughts about adam and kate and their dynamic with john and it's mainly that #obviously anything about john said by the ghoul has to be taken with a whole handful of salt. obviously #because it was actively trying to manipulate sam and dean #but when the ghoul said that younger adam bugged kate 24/7 to call john i believe it. just because it makes sense #he was young! he wanted to know who his dad was. and that's understandable #and the fact that adam HAD to beg 24/7 for kate to call him....i think kate knew something was off about john #i really do. and the fact that john only showed up on adam's birthdays and only ever took him out to baseball games #which are very crowded very PUBLIC places where anything can be observed by bystanders #i think kate set that up as well. without adam's knowledge #but adam eventually grew disillusioned with john as well because from a kid's perspective #who's had to watch his mother work herself to death to support the both of them #john WAS a douchebag who only ever came around to try and fail to play house #he didn't bother trying to raise adam he didn't pay child support he didn't do ANYTHING #he just showed up pretended to act like a father and then left. and adam and kate were left there still #with their bills. with adam still having to raise himself. with kate still working the night shift and breaking her back to support them #it makes me think about how it affects adam in the future. like his behavior #because adam as we've seen has always tried to look at things from different perspectives and hear people out #in 5x18 he was like okay i'll hear you guys out even though i don't like you. give me one good reason #and in 15x08 he advocates for sam and dean even though he doesn't want to. he talks michael #but it's so interesting to me. because the line that's always gotten me about 15x08 is 'you still care about that? after he left you in the #cage?' #and it's like. adam IS genuinely trying to understand where michael's coming from. he DOES understand michael's love for his father #but when concerning the father it's like #he DOES tend to be black and white about it. john was a shitty person so therefore he's not his dad #god is a shitty person who left michael in the cage therefore michael shouldn't care what he thinks. or about him in general #et cetera et cetera #the issue of the father is the one issue that adam is black and white about. and that is to say fuck them we don't need them #it's SOOOO interesting to me. really #kate rambles #adam milligan

[logicpng]

earth goop

#hylics #hylics 2 #gibby hylics #hylics gibby #hylics game #okay i just wanted to have fun trying to render the Flesh but. this was more work than i gambled for #even if not that much time was spent. i can't really see how to render this More:tm: though it'll just be overkill #the one time i wish i turned on the timelapse recording to watch back the strokes build up #sorry for all the gibbyposting LKJHFKJSDFHFJKFJ #hylics 2 spoilers

[blocksruinedme]

Jimmy may have a bad memory but he is a CLEVER and hardworking boy

who pays very close attention to how other youtubers do things, and takes notes, and works so hard, and now he has 810k subscribers because he knows how to do it.

(well, sometimes clever and always hardworking)

context:

If anyone wants my spreadsheet just lmk. my data mostly came from the youtube wiki and MaxData's visualization of new life smp members' subs numbers. oh, i'll include that!

Jimmy was at 609k when new life started in may 27. he made a (lovely!) pink house.

Twenty one days later he's gained 201,000 subs.

Between cpk and pix now probably, having jumped ahead of oli & pearl.

Y'all when people talk about jimmy being dumb, watch and think how much is an atrocious memory, and how long is not being quick to understand things. If he settles in and works at it! If he's in a group event in mcc and not individual! If he has a strong team captain in mcc who he can listen to! (he's said the last one is how he succeeds).

Jimmy can fucking do it, just in his own way - and he doesn't care to put a lot of effort into learning some things that some viewers want. As I barely care about minecraft, I do have an interesting perspective here! <3

Jimmy can't just get by on his minecraft skills plus his winning smile, comedic timing, charisma, and skill at social rapport and interpersonal... okay I've made it sound like a lot but he has some brains. Those brains just don't know the recipe for... things I also don't care about.

Jimmy Solidarity. You appreciate him. Good.

#late night jimmy rantings #came back to edit tags #cause it's easy confidence #and his humility #how much he appreciates every one who has ever helped him and he will say over and over how lucky he was with who he found #his lack of real ego #his willingness to fail! in public! and just laugh it off and be mildly self deprecating #unlike the 'are you okay i promise you're smart please it's okay' self deprecating i've been seeing in one CC i finally started watching #he works with other people easily #and skizz says he makes space for other people right? #he works hard cause he can't just rely on being an amazing builder or redstoner or whatever who people will just come back for #he's a professional silly boy who loves to play the fool #please people please understand he is the one running these jokes #go listen to his *acting* as he's saying don't call me ken while he's making these shorts #i think one problems with 'internet people flip out about jimmy's relationships with his close friends based on what they see online' #is that many people don't understand how well he can act? #jimmy can make untrue things look genuine through acting #he said once - when asked - that if he couldn't do this he'd love to be a voice actor #solidaritygaming #solidarity gaming #new life smp #jimmy solidarity #nlsmp

[altruistic-meme]

last line challenge!

Rules: show the last line you wrote (or drew) and tag as many people as there are words (or however many you like).

I got tagged by @iworshipsappho for this thank you dear <3

didn't get much writing done yesterday, but i DID get this bit that I'm kind of proud of for (why is there) joy in this poison chapter 11!

He wondered, for the first time, if Nathaniel may understand him better than previously thought. And then he tried not to think at all.

I'm going to leave this as an open tag this time 💜🧡

#i think i only wrote like 50 words yesterday :')) wasn't the best but that's okay #hopefully we'll get more today after work #chapter 11 is gonna be. angsty. I'm so sorry that i just come back and give yall angst. #tag game #(wit)jitp #shh ac

[emdotcom]

I run a modded Minecraft server for my friends & me, & we run the spectacular Cobblemon mod (it's REALLY good, cannot recommend it enough). Not all the 'mons are modeled, though, so we ALSO are running a supplementary Cardboard Cutout Mon, which replaces the default "no model found" substitute doll with a flat sprite.

None of those sprites, however, have shiny forms, so I've been slowly digging through to rectify that :3 + add some additional forms that ain't there. Behold! The only edits I felt were substantial enough to post.

#pokemon #Hisuian Zorua #Hisuian Zoroark #Magearna #Zorua #Zoroark #pixel art #Shiny Edits #pokemon edits #gale chatter #okay you can see that like. if i can salvage a bit of the sprite i will. like magearna is largely unchanged #but for hisuian zoroark that wasn't possible. the design is so different i had to draw at least half that #& you can see that for the 'suians I'm breaking some 'rules' of the sprites (limited color palette) for the gradient effect #but I feel like this is a fair instance of that & am tryna keep it to a minimum #hisuian zoroark & zorua are modern pokemon that don't need to work with limited pixels & palettes & thus are designed accordingly #so in trying to translate them back i COULD self-impose those previous limits on myself but it literally wouldn't change the file size. #see at first i thought these were just like. the little menu sprites in the games. but i pulled a low key toxtricity in bc i couldn't find #& the size & style are not the same which implies that either 1) the modder got those sprites somewhere else or 2) made them all themselves #i cannot stress enough #hundreds. hundreds of sprites. like i cut out redundant sprites bc the mod hasn't been updated but it is taking me TIME to go back & shiny #also hey yeah the mod is for a prev version & the redundancies are giving me a HEADACHE if i ever fix this up maybe I post the mod tbh #see it doesn't sound that bad until u get biblically accurate cutiefly & texture error cacturne on your doorstep

[mattodore]

scrapped pose from theo's birthday edit

little koala 🐨

#river dipping #theodore doe #matthias evanoff #echthroi #a burning house to live in #ts4 #blender #...that's just my general tag for pics of their sims but this is them in blender so it feels weird to use that... oh well lmfao #i'm waiting for sim ripper to load one of the outfits i need for this pose i wanna make so. i'm just in blender spinning mattodore around #i could start working on the pose now and apply the armature later but i'll just wait #ignore theo's weird knees btw........... it's just blender the pose looked fine in game when i tested it originally #do NOT ignore matthias's pancake ass tho! for some reason these slacks just do that to his ass. it's sooo criminal!! he has a bubble butt!! #anyway... theo is like. openly sobbing but his face is literally buried in matthias's shoulder so you can't see his expression #he's so wounded here... i mean obviously since this was originally gonna be in the edit but........ :/ #yk that bit from the caption on the edit where theo gets flashbacks and describes the breeze and the looming darkness..... #and then to have matthias see it all... like that recognition of a part of theo's self that he doesn't even turn his own face toward... ugh #he needed that comfort yk... and he needed to be held. at every age. #UGHHHHH okay okay i'm letting myself get emotional here let's go back to thinking abt matthias's pancake ass in these pics haha funny #insert that screenshot of roman texting ''i am going to kill myself'' to gerri

[musubiki]

okay im actually a little emotionally attached to mochis shop being a little cat bookstore now

#so warm...... #it invokes the feeling that its been there for 20 years #also seems like the kind of place a witch would run #theres a bunch of plants and cats and warm lighting #im trying to think if the cat witch was a cool side character how would i design her #since a lot of my side characters are cool as hell like murda and lady magg-lynn #it gives off the cozy vibes of broosters cafe #one(1) seating/reading area that consists of a little table and some chairs around it #that usually is taken up by coco/lime/oscar/taffy playing board games or something #some random girl with a crush on lime: heyy is it okay if i sit here and read for a bit? #lime: actually we dont allow reading the books in the store until after youve purchased them. im sure you understand #hes so indifferent and it works against him cuz a lot of girls are like (wow so cool....i want him more now...) #a tiny bookstore on the outter reaches of the downtown area. like before there is a house essentially attatched to the back where they live #oscar somehow affording a house with a storefront in the downtown area #( how did you afford this...) #(i work.) #mochi compensates him appropriately for letting her hijack his store #he doesnt mind though. he wasnt sure what kind of shop to run anyway #plus with magic mochi around he doesnt need to worry about utility bills or furniture or anything ever again so its a fair trade off #(rumor has it that shop has books on anything you could imagine) #someone walks in asking about 8th century pottery techniques from the eastern regions of the kingdom #(let me check the back!) she says and is back with the exact book 5 minutes later

[derpcakes]

Rampant anti-mobile game sentiment on display in this anime

[Image ID: 5 screencaps showing an anime girl sitting on a train, looking tiredly at advertisements for Magia Record and Fate/Grand Order. In the final screencap, the subtitle text just says "Grr..."]

#16bit Sensation Another Layer #for context she wants to make epic VNs starring beautiful heroines but has been born outside their golden age #and is stuck working at a tiny game dev that only wants to produce bargain bin dating sims #but that's okay bc the premise of the show is that she gets time travelled back to 1992! not that we've seen much of that yet #SO surreal seeing actual existing games be directly referenced and shown like this when I'm so used to them being bleeped out or #given parody titles to avoid licensing issues

[rainymoodlet]

[TJoL+] A Summary of Events,

I realize that I skip around a lot when I'm posting legacy gameplay - the truth is, my ADHD and limited play-time constantly mixes into impatience when it comes to certain stages of my gameplay! When y'all last saw Ivory, she had just gone on a date with Eva Capricciosa, so it's a little jarring that the next time we see our heir is her living with Eva and Cassandra Goth in an established relationship, right?

The reality is, I took plenty of pictures following the events of the past few days in-game - I just didn't like any of them. Figures that I got to hodge-podge them together in Photoshop to run a quick summary... only to end up loving the way they all came out. 😑

I thought I might summarize the last few days so that we can pick up with where I'm currently at in my gameplay. I'm planning on updating y'all with a more official post about the KMiK/TJoL+ posting schedule (KMiK during the week, TJoL on the weekends) while my work schedule settles in!

So, we pick up where we left off... with Ivory (after randomly pulling a "Flirty Introduction" in the middle of gameplay) having just completed a very successful all-nighter date with the lovely Eva Capricciosa. 💅⛓️

The morning after her date with Eva, Ivory had a hot daydream (left, courtesy of WickedWhims) about her ex-girlfriend, Cassandra Goth, while taking a shower. Ivory and Cassandra used to date in high school, but broke up amicably before they went to University.

Not two hours after that daydream did Ivory get a call from Eva (right). It went down a little differently in-game (Ivory and Eva didn't officially start dating until after this all went down) but it was the main inspiration for this edit.

At this point I guffawed out loud - I was already sold on Eva and Ivory as a couple, but Cass and Ivory were something I was trying to get Ivory back to (spoilers djkfhd but Cassandra is a Food Critic and was eventually going to be one of the reviewers for Ivory's restaurant - my Kruegers are establishing a habit of autonomously shortening their timelines dfkjsdf)

It was only natural, then, that Ivory invited Cassandra out to breakfast - the literal morning after hooking up with Eva. 😮‍💨

Ivory just takes gorgeous women out as an excuse to get pictures of Experimental Dishes and do research for work - she just earned the Workaholic lifestyle and it makes so much sense.

(She Dip Kissed Cass with a drink in her hand and it was just so... her.)

It seemed as though Cassandra missed Ivory just as much as she missed her, because she was instantly receptive to all of Ivory's questions about her relationship status, her thoughts on open relationships and her goals, etc. etc. etc. When Ivory asked Cass her opinion on Eva, Cass was all smiles - and the literal minute I clicked "Go Home" and the event ended, Ivory got this text message:

And that just sealed it, to be honest!

From there, it was as simple as setting up a Dynamic for the three of them in my WickedWhims settings to disable Jealousy (I didn't have the time to deal with OpenLoveLife's poly settings omg) and let Ivory and Eva take the reins from there! If I had a Youtube channel I'd have been talking you all through this as it played, so bear with my nerdy ass as I describe how it happened story-wise dkfjhsd ~

The three of them ended up "gOiNg OuT tO pArTy" in Windenburg the same night (as I said... I'm impatient) and right off the bat, Eva made good use of that "no Jealousy" rule. She and Ivory circled a very confused Cassandra, who was still processing the fact that the two women who had very boldly asked her out back-to-back

one.) knew each other and two.) were both looking at her with "I'm going to Ruin You in the Best Way Possible" eyes 👀

Eva produced a single rose, and Cassandra looked at Ivory like "... is this for real?"

And when I tell you Ivory looked at her like this.

... hell, I want her to top me. Can I say that? Is that legal?

What progressed was them literally autonomously making out and flirting with each other all night ~*~* in tha club *~*~ and when I tell you I'm so genuinely upset that I couldn't make these shots work as an individual post at all, but I think they look SO GOOD HERE?

Like, have you ever seen a Sim more down for this than Eva??? She's become one of my favorite townies and I have never touched her with a thousand foot pole... solely because I never play in Windenburg dfksdhj. I have been missing out and so are you all omg

From that night, I literally just started decorating their apartment as you see it here. (MDNI with that post just because it has the minutest of Cassandra side nip but still) because, say it with me now... I'm impatient.

With limited playtime and "I look at this too long"itis affecting Ivory's small Fashion District apartment, I moved these three in the night after they started dating djhsfh

Below are some highlights of gameplay that I once again could not make work in a post by themselves... and now love what I've done with them and think they look great in the body of this post tf :/

(I didn't realize I took so little pictures of Cassandra... especially when I'm admittedly so obsessed with the make-over I gave her dskjdf)

Throughout this time, Ivory began filming herself cooking and uploading the videos to SimTube - it gained her a good bit of fame, and after advancing to Level 9 in the Chef career, she reached Level 2 Celebrity status within a week! (It took an exhausting amount of replying to comments and dealing with laggy cooking livestreams, omg)

Throughout this process, all three of them were constantly popping diaper thought bubbles - Ivory for sure had baby fever, because the minute she would come home from work and interact with her partners, she'd start thinking about lil nooboos!

I didn't know, however, that both Ivory and Eva had really low fertility - 20% and 30% respectively! (In my games, couples can have biological children regardless with a system of random rolls I developed before the Science Baby update: Eva rolled as Can Become Pregnant whereas Ivory and Cassandra rolled Can Get Others Pregnant. Which yes means that if Ivory and Cassandra wanted to have a genetic child they'd need to have a Science Baby, no it makes no sense, I know)

Eva had the Would Be Happy to Have A Child trait, and it absolutely wrecked her every time she failed to conceive. I was trying to track her fertility, get them goin' on the right days, and none of it was working. (This was before I figured out their fertility rate.)

So I -- can you believe this -- got impatient and cheated their fertility rates to 80% and 75% respectively, had them use the straight-up Try for Baby interaction instead of relying on them to abuse WickedWhims, and sent Ivory off to work with my fingers crossed.

Ivory came back from work with a promotion to Level 10, Celebrity Chef, and some fantastic news from her girlfriend. 🥹 

(whom she proceeded to autonomously massage & snuggle tf out of 🥹🥹🥹)

The cats totally sensed that Eva was pregnant, okay, it was adorable. Dolce (her Yorkie) followed her around even more, and throughout the days as Ivory climbed the ranks of stardom (she's so close to getting her restaurant and that Third Rank!) and Cassandra made more and more breakthroughs...

Well...

We pick up after that bassinet there has already been sold, friends! 😉 If you made it this far, bless you for puttin' up with me absolutely rambling about my silly little gameplay - I really enjoyed revisiting this side of their story, and I was so frustrated that I just couldn't figure out how to work it into that ~ Tumblr Gameplay Styling ~ that I prefer for my posts hrrrr

Hopefully this helps to streamline the Kruegers gameplay, and gives us more context for following the story of our Gen 3 Heir! 🥹 I'm hoping to do a more posed/gameplay story-based feel for his chapter, and I'm so excited to introduce you guys to him. :') I am genuinely going to try and be as linear with his ass as possible... at least, when he gets to Young Adult sdkfjdsf

Have a cookie, baby, you've earned it! 🍪🍪🍪

#;tjol+ #ts4 #ts4 legacy #sim: ivory #sim: eva #sim: cassandra goth #oh man this got... LONG. i did not expect that so i will definitely be summarizing this in bullet points later omg kgfddfkj #this is absolutely inspired by the brilliant minds of brandy softpine and cinamun and kurt zombietrait and olli lucidicer and #river mattodore and all my brilliant simblr fellow creatives who so clearly love their pixels okay #i could not make ANY of these pictures work for some reason and now i'm staring at them like... wow i love my gameplay #and i hate that i couldn't make them work but i kind of... love them laid out like this #cassandra is literally baby's favorite mom so idk why she doesn't feature more but kjhdf i promise she's like the center of ivory and eva's #fcking worlds #the game keeps thinking they're all cheating on one another its hilarious #they have so many miletones while they're all kissin' each others cheeks in the kitchen #i have so many more tags but i must away!!! i will be back but ENJOY I LOVE YOU IF YOU READ THIS AND I LOVE YOU REGARDLESS MWAH MWAH

[lvebug]

idk guys i think we should all let people have fun and not bully them for having hobbies on the website where we all talk about our weird hobbies. if something isn't your cup of tea just don't interact with it but why are we all up in arms? i've seen so many unique and unusual rp blogs that i dont see how a jesus blog is any different.

#this is all i'm saying on it i dont have any skin in the game but i've seen a lot of hate on my dash today and that just makes me sad #okay im going back to work now hopefully we can all return to our regularly scheduled programming !! #THERE'S A LOT OF BEAUTY IN ORDINARY THINGS — ooc

[clingyduofan]

eclipse federation? :3 also if i can ask for multiples, would love to see ur subzam and vitalazam songs <3

ALWAYS HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT ALL OF THEM YAY!!

this is THE eclipse federation song to me. I can't even explain how much i associate it with them just. AUGH. I get so sad whenever I listen to it

this one too!!! i love this song. the lyrics "you say I'm gonna miss you when you leave / you are probably right" really remind me of them

only recently found this one but it's sooo them

SUBZAM SONGS! servants and kings is Their song to me i think about them whenever i listen to it. the lyrics "but you'd become my candle in the dark / and all through the hell, you were a shield across my heart" fit them so well..

THIS ONE IS SO ZAM ABOUT SUBZ.......... i have more to say about it but i cannot form any coherent thoughts when listening to it it's just. so them

this is the first song i put in their playlist and it's sooo them.. actually here's my subzam playlist because if i don't link it i'll end up linking like three more songs

VITALAZAM SONGS!! i will admit i don't know their dynamic as well but this one reminds me of them a lot ^_^

this reminds me of them too!! specifically in the vod where they go to the last eclipse base

#ask #ask game #long post #okay i need to stop thinking about gay cubes and get back to work. THANKS FOR ASKING ABOUT THEM!!

[bunnyb34r]

I wish my brain would let me play video games again without a care

Now I'm like "no I can't bc I'm wasting my precious free time. I can't reason using my day off to play video games when I could be using that time to do literally anything else" like fucking come on

#marquilla #and i work part time! so i theoretically have a shitload of time to do this but i dont think I've even turned on any of my games since i #started working like i used to spend my nights playing animal crossing until the early morning hours and now im like noo i cant sorry #same with watching tv series like no sorry i have to watch the same two channels every day bc they keep me on track time wise #like oh medium is on? it's 11am. oh bbc world news tonight is on? it's 7:30pm LIKE BITCH YOU CAN ENJOY THINGS YOU DONT NEED TO BE #ON A SCHEDULE ALL THE TIME #one time my mom changed the channel on the living room tv (it's been on one channel 24/7 for years bc it's the one channel we can agree on #and we need the background noise) and when i was getting ready for work i was thrown off so bad bc the good wife wasnt on and thats whats on #when i put my shoes on for work and i was like ????? as soon as i got home i changed the channel back ahhdhdgd i was like nope i need it #but yknow def not autistic. nope not me. gotta be something else #im trying so hard to break my routine hence going to The movies and shit bc hey im watching something new! i AM somewhere different. i am #DOING something else. but it's so hard to get my head to be okay with even this minor change #AUGH