#rose was like. idk about lae'zel shaking sense into him that might feel a little like cazador's staff?

[qzwrites]

nykalaeni/astarion 7

while writing the scene where nykki vented to karlach, i initially had her venting to wyll, as someone who is pretty smart about people, but then i thought. hmmm wyll is not actually a very neutral party. being as. he is the reason nykalaeni and astarion made it official.

and like wyll's a good guy and i don't think he would take advantage of their relationship trouble, but...idk, maybe he has a little more incentive to be like "it seems like you guys are having a lot of trouble making it work, maybe that's a sign"

whereas karlach actually has quite a lot in common with astarion, background-wise, even if they have responded to it very differently. so i thought karlach was a good choice for a sympathetic ear. she'd also understand the difficulty of wanting to have sex and knowing it would hurt her partner, although that's. obviously more literal in her case lmao.

and then i was like, what would be the funniest person to meddle in this situation? lae'zel. lae'zel, who fell for nykalaeni harder and faster than astarion, or even wyll. lae'zel, who was the first dangerous person to come onto nykalaeni and make her even think about kink stuff. lae'zel, who has been VERY CONSPICUOUSLY SILENT about the relationship stuff; other companions have commented from time to time but lae'zel says NOTHING it's like she never even confessed. nothing. no feelings here, no sir.

except.

well, now it seems like astarion is fucking up. and you know what lae'zel has learned over the course of this game that friends do for each other? fucking meddle in personal business.

(notable in that everyone else would feel very much like they shouldn't get involved, or have no right to get involved, so no one else is going to come to astarion and be like GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS but honestly that's probably lae'zel's strong suit as a friend. explain yourself and prove you're not fucking up or simply stop fucking up. so she's really the only person i could see pushing her way into this business!)

-

Lae'zel shoved aside the screen dividing Astarion's corner of the room from the rest of it. "No, please," he said, "come right in. It's not as if I'm doing anything, after all."

Predictably, Lae'zel ignored that. She stared at Astarion, looking as pissed off as she ever did. After a moment, she asked, "What did you do?"

"You need to be slightly more specific than that," Astarion said.

Lae'zel made one of her rude noises. "When you and Nykalaeni returned from the brothel, you immediately separated. She has been on the rooftop ever since. Obviously, something went wrong, and you must know that or you would have sought her out by now."

Astarion frowned. "You know," he said, "I've always thought one of your most likable qualities is how you've kept your nose out of my business before now."

"She chose you over me," Lae'zel said, "and you are causing her pain." She crossed her arms over her chest, and leaned back. "I suspect you are also causing yourself pain, which makes you doubly foolish."

That was uncomfortably astute, and it got his back up. He snapped his book shut. "I did not ask for your advice, and I do not need it."

"Wrong," Lae'zel said. "You did not ask for advice, but you clearly need it desperately. How did you fumble a free evening at a brothel?"

"I beg your pardon, I have never fumbled anything relating to sex," he said.

"I see," Lae'zel said. "Then the problem was in your other behavior."

"There is no problem," Astarion said. "It was a lovely but rather intense experience, and it's not surprising Nykalaeni would need some time alone to recover."

"Chk," Lae'zel said, jerking her chin up. "You think me blind because I have been silent. The place Nykalaeni most often seeks comfort is in your presence. That she is not here now, reading over your shoulder or from another tome, is evidence enough of a problem."

"Well I don't know what else she wants," Astarion snapped. "I did my best! It's not my fault if that's suddenly not good enough!"

"I see," Lae'zel said again. "And was 'your best' what you wanted to do?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" Astarion asked.

Lae'zel sighed, as if Astarion was a misbehaving child. He entertained a brief thought of lunging at her, but he'd seen her fight enough to know that would not be nearly as cathartic in reality as it was in his head. "Idiot vampire," she said, "what do we have in common?"

"Nothing," Astarion said. He thought better of it, then added, "A tadpole."

"Correct," Lae'zel said. "But what did she think we had in common, when she started having sex with you as well?"

He supposed 'being sexy' was not the answer Lae'zel had in mind.

Apparently she didn't expect him to have an answer at all, because after only a few moments, she said, "Being straight-forward in our desires. There is little Nykalaeni appreciates more than honesty, and little she likes less than being manipulated. So I ask you again: was whatever you consider 'your best' what you truly wanted? Or were you doing what you thought she wanted you to do?"

Astarion sat with that for a moment. He had even told her he would leave if he was uncomfortable, hadn't he? But instead of doing that, he fell back on old habits. Unfortunately, Nykalaeni knew him well enough now that that was probably apparent to her. And if she noticed it, she would be upset by it. That was almost certainly the case. "Shit," he said.

"That is what I thought," Lae'zel said. Then she leaned over and slapped him across the face.

Astarion jerked back. "Ow, what the hell?"

"Stop hurting her," Lae'zel hissed. "Go apologize and tell her you will try to do better, or I will make you regret that she chose you over me."

"I already said you were right," Astarion muttered, setting aside his book to stand up. "You didn't need to hit me."

"No," Lae'zel agreed easily. "That was for me. Go."

#bg3 #nykalaeni #laksd;jfas she's not even in this bit but that's the worldstate so that's the tag i guess #rose was like. idk about lae'zel shaking sense into him that might feel a little like cazador's staff? #WHICH IS FAIR AND TRUE but also it's the only fucking thing that gets through to him apart from like. huge reveals of slaves and prisons #anyway lae'zel could pulverize this twink if she wanted but she literally is doing the equivalent of like. flicking him in the forehead #she's not trying to HARM him she's trying to get him to PAY ATTENTION #aaaand she only really knows one way to do that #is it a good idea? idk! is it effective? in this case i think so! #it helps that lae'zel has NOT meddled or made it clear she still has feelings for nykalaeni before this #please do not physically harm astarion to teach him a lesson but like. SHRUG #fanfic