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educatedsimps · 9 hours

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Hi! Saw your requests were open and I just had to stop by! Could I request a (not exactly angst bc the idea is funny but definitely in character for him) Bokuto x reader where he's ranting to a friend about how he loves to hug the reader and his friend just makes an offhand comment about how he'll probably crush her since he's a pretty big guy and he goes all emo mode about it. He doesn't want to hurt anyone :( Obviously we gotta add some comfort at the end for the silly guy

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bokuto kōtarō x f!reader

a/n: omg of course!! i haven't had the chance to write for bokuto and yes i agree this is literally perfect for him 🥰

cw: timeskip spoilers, atsumu being stupid, some hurt/comfort, msby crack

"I can’t wait to go home after this. I’m exhausted," Sakusa sighed.

"It’s not useful practice if it’s not exhausting, Omi-Omi. Be glad you’ve got teammates like us," Atsumu drawled, winking at his teammate and earning a disgusted glare from across the table.

"I thought today’s practice was fun! We got to try the new unorthodox version of our quick attack, and we've almost got it!" Hinata chirped next to Atsumu, with bits of his food flying from his mouth.

"I'm fine with it as long as you guys don't overexert yourselves during training," Lisa, Atsumu's girlfriend and the team's physiotherapist, chimed in from Atsumu's other side.

"What are you guys planning to do when you get home?" Meian asked, stuffing a rice ball in his mouth.

"Shower," was Sakusa's immediate answer.

"Probably do a little bit of meditation," Hinata mused.

"Call my brother to ask for more meal prep bentos," Atsumu said. An amused scoff came from his girlfriend.

"What about you, Bokuto?"

Having been focused on his food the whole time, Bokuto nearly choked on his rice when called upon by his captain. With tempura crumbs coating his lips, he smiled widely and announced, "I'm going home to give y/n a big hug!"

"You sure love hugging y/n, Bokuto-san!" Hinata chuckled, popping a salmon nigiri in his mouth.

"Of course I do! I love hugging her! She's so huggable and I just wanna squeeze her so tight all the time and transfer all of my love for her," Bokuto said, with with his fists in the air. "You guys should all hug your girlfriends tight! The tighter you hug her the more she'll know you love her!"

Shooting Lisa a lovesick smile, Atsumu stated, "We all love hugging our girlfriends, but I won't accidentally crush 'er to bits like someone." He nodded towards Bokuto.

Bokuto stilled, staring at Atsumu with confusion.

"Miya..." Meian warned under his breath.

"What? I mean, have ya seen the guy? He's huge! Could prob'ly flatten 'er if he wanted to," Atsumu continued, chortling at the thought. He stopped short as he noticed the glares from Meian and Sakusa. "What? What'd I say?"

By then, Bokuto was already in a completely different headspace. He had a blank expression on his face and a faraway look in his eyes. His shoulders were slightly hunched and his usually spiky hair seemed to droop at the edges.

Sakusa sighed what was probably the heaviest sigh in the history of mankind as Hinata stage-whispered to his teammate, "Atsumu-san, I think you hurt Bokuto's feelings."

Wide eyed, the blonde setter started to defend himself. "WHA-?! no, i- I DIDN'T EVEN-"

Sensing Bokuto's incoming emotinal shut down (or emotional episode, in this case), Lisa quickly tried to divert their attention. "Please, 'Tsumu. You wish you were as strong as Bokuto-san. Your spikes are weak as shit-"

" 'Cause I'm literally a setter!"

"-and not an all-rounder, which is why Kageyama-kun is ranked first in the country and you're second."

"BABE-"

"Maybe I shouldn't hug her anymore. I don't wanna hurt her. What if I really crush her one day? Then she'll really be flattened like a piece of bread. I don't wanna hurt her. So this means I can't hug her anymore. But I like hugging her. But does she even like my hugs?" Came Bokuto's voice. His brows were now furrowed and his face was etched with worry.

"Of course she does, Bokuto-san! I'm sure she loves your hugs, and you love her too much to ever hurt her, right?" Hinata and Lisa attempted to cheer up the saddened spiker.

Finishing the last of his food, Sakusa stood up, muttering, "I'm exhausted, I can't deal with this right now. My partner's here to pick me up anyway," As he walked past the other side of the table, he spoke to Atsumu in a low voice. "Only a jerk like you would say something like that to Bokuto, of all people."

"SHUT UP, OMI.”

"I’m home…"

Your ears perked up at the sound of Bokuto’s voice and you immediately noticed his dejected tone. Closing your laptop, you got up from your desk and bounced over to the front door to greet him.

Sticking your head round the corner, you saw him place his stuff down by the counter before staring into space. His face was blank and devoid of emotion but his eyes were filled with inexplicable sadness. Seeing him like this tugged on your heartstrings and you knew he was going through one of his emotional episodes. You just didn’t know why.

"Hey, Kō! How was your day?" Slowly walking towards him, you reached out your arms to give him a hug but stopped short when he cried out.

"NO, DON’T HUG ME. I’LL CRUSH YOU."

You froze with your arms mid-air before you dropped them back to your side. He had one hand held out to stop you from coming closer and his face was tucked into his other arm. You could hear quiet sniffles coming from him and your heart broke seeing how upset he was.

"But you already have a crush on me, baby. And I have a crush on you too! I thought we’ve already established that?" You joked, trying to lighten the mood.

It didn’t work. It was like he didn’t even hear you, so you decided to give him some space (like Akaashi had advised). You guided him to sit on the couch while you went about the house finishing up your chores. After several minutes, he seemed to feel a little better and you decided to talk to him (also like Akaashi had advised).

Sitting by his side on the couch, you reached out and held his hands in your own. His eyes were downcast and he was avoiding your gaze as if his life depended on it.

"Kō? What's wrong?"

"Nothin'."

"Look at me, baby. Please? I wanna see your cute face," you cooed. He pouted for a while more (which was adorable, by the way) before he finally caved.

"Tsum-Tsum said I'll crush you if I hug you too tight 'cause I'm so much bigger and stronger than you. And I don't wanna crush you, I promise! It just made me sacred to think I might not know my own strength and end up hurting you in the process. That's why I'm scared of accidentally hurting you when I’m excited and I know that if I did, you wouldn't say anything which is why I don't wanna accidentally hurt you with my hugs in the first place-" He swallowed the rest of his words as you pressed your lips to his.

"Kō, I love your hugs. They're the warmest hugs anyone has ever given me. Don't tell my mom, but sometimes your hugs are even better than hers," You giggled softly. A small smile appeared on his face as he looked at you. "And it's not a bad thing that you're so strong. It makes your arms really nice to hug! I promise you'll never be able to crush me. I'm stronger than you think, you know?"

"Really? You really like my hugs?" He asked, hope in his eyes.

"Really. A hundred per cent. A thousand per cent. I wouldn't like it any other way, Kō," You reassured him, kissing him sweetly once more. Within seconds, his entire mood had shifted and he was now beaming.

"Okay! I can hug you now!" He cheered. Before you could process anything, you were held in your favourite set of arms and wrapped up in the warmest hug on earth. You hugged him back tightly and felt his soft lips press against the crown of your head. Snuggling into his warmth, you felt so lucky to have him.

"Oh my god, anyone who says your hugs aren't perfect are clearly stupid," You sighed happily.

"Tsum-Tsum is pretty stupid sometimes," Kotaro hummed.

You pulled away, gasping in faux shock. "Really?"

"Pfft, yeah. Even Lisa says so!" He guffawed.

Before you could reply, your phone buzzed with an incoming message.

Lisa: “hey girl! hope everything’s ok with bokuto. my boyfriend’s kinda stupid sometimes so he doesn’t think before he says stuff. hope bokuto’s not feeling too down!”

Y/n: “it’s all good! managed to cheer him up pretty quickly today, haha”

Lisa: “that’s good to hear. you’re the only one who can cheer him up like that, y/n! anyway, rest well, you two. see ya next week!”

Reacting to her message with a heart, you put your phone down and turned back to your boyfriend.

"So, you gonna hug me or not?"

a/n: UM I HOPE THIS WAS OKAY??? pls lmk what u think 😭

#educated.simps #haikyuu x reader #lyssa.writes #simps.write #haikyuu!!#haikyuu fluff #bokuto kotaro #bokuto x reader #bokuto kotaro x reader #bokuto fluff #bokuto x reader fluff

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sleepymccoy · 15 hours

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Let me tell you about the space ship I've made up

Looks like an alien ufo

Biggish. Like, could land in a football stadium but it'd be tight

Used to be a novelty luxury cruise ship so the interior walls are artistic and stupid

The outside is artistic and stupid too lol

This is a random google image, but has the vibe

Is now a retrofitted fishing vessel owned by the government

Still has a theatre tho. Madness

Top floor in the little alien bubble is the bridge and some of the engine

The government is making the crew trial a new form of engine fuel which is basically fish offal and sunlight. It's working but god at what cost?

Is fish offal a term? I think it gets the vibe across

So the engines need like weekly cleaning and are exhausting

They've got three engines cos if a crab gets caught stalled in there they have to swap to an auxiliary

And it smells like cooked fish

One quarter of the floor opens up to let them do some open air fishing when they're over water

The bottom floor is smaller than the main and used to be the staff rooms when it was a yacht

Now it's been retrofitted into a vegetable farm in another government initiative to have self sustaining food on short transit ships

Like this

It kinda works, this is a small scale rollout to check feasibility

They don't have fake gravity so when they're in space everyone floats

The beans are having a hard time adjusting to zero grav

Some of the crew are a bit new to it too

There's hooks to help people walk and furniture on the ceiling to use while in space

The ship feels much smaller when it's landed

Cos it's a big ol disc it has to flip 90° to launch out of orbit, cos of air resistence

So all the launch safety chairs are mounted on the walls out of the way and you've gotta climb a little ladder to get to one lol

Union regs are trying really hard to keep up with 24/hr ship maintenance

There are four eight hours shifts in a 24 hour day, three of them function in turn for a third of the day each, and the fourth in management

They don't have titles like night duty, morning shift, so on, cos time is made up here. But they have different focuses and skill sets

Like the equivalent of night duty has an extra cleaner to do deep cleaning, and the engineer is more skilled in maintenance and upkeep than complex flight support

The management shift is the worst for sleep schedule cos you just gotta get up when shit happens

There are half as many beds as there are crew and they share with someone on a different shift

Management shares with night duty and if they have to be up during night duty they just find a different spot to kip during the day

Like I said, union is still figuring it out

We're around Saturn, the union movement is pretty new! This is a source of tension cos most of the government employees aren't unionised

They also actually wear the uniforms, the losers

So I got ahead of myself there, there's three types of crew

Ship function, like engineer, cleaner, cook, pilot, that kind of vibe (mostly unionised, mostly refuse to wear the uniforms)

Government hire, like the gardeners (they prefer botanists but cmon) and chemical engineers figuring out the propulsion system (taking the initiative project very seriously)

The fishermen (the fuck is a uniform I'm paid commission) (that is not true, but they have that vibe)

When they're over the ocean fishing most of the rest of the crew take a weekend

When they're landed to trade fish nearly everyone gets time off

When they're flying the fishermen get time off

There might be some small jobs to do if there's a long period of time with no real work, like if it's four days between fishing jobs the fishermen will do a stocktake count in storage

Or if they're trading keeps them overnight the engineers and cleaners might take the opportunity to clean the airlocks and chutes safely

An eight hour shift is never busy, there's a lot of down time between tasks cos they work every day and need some time off

This means there's often an opportunity to fuck, which has formed most of the forward momentum in the story I'm writing lolll

Also cos the beds are on a roster they kinda have to fuck in public places oh noooo what a shame that I get to add tension to every other blow job

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killerchickadee · 2 years

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I usually work 7-3:30pm but I went in at 5 so I could get more done.... the idea though is that if you go in early you can leave early.

So of course I didn't get to leave until.... 3:30.

Part of why I wanted to leave early is so I could go grocery shopping, but by the time I got off I was like... nope. But I'm starving so pizza time I guess.

#thinking about that sweet ot #I'm already 3 hours over for the week #and it's my tuesday #i have to stay an extra hour friday and saturday cause lol there's no manager until 4:30 #and I'll probably stay late tomorrow let's be real #like i don't want this working 45-50 hours a week thing to go on indefinitely #but right now we're fucked for staffing #and I'm still trying to catch up on bills #so I'm exhausted but gotta do what you gotta do

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azaracyy · 4 months

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a lesson on good karma digimon survive week 2024 day 4: supporting characters

#digimon #gomamon #digimon survive #survive week #survive week 2024 #rambling ahead. you don't have to read the tags beyond bc there's nothing that important tbh... you can just look at the art...#exhausted from being out and doing housework yesterday. then got a last-minute job with very urgent deadline today #finished everything but yeah basically i did anything but art so #irl do be like that aint it #anyway it's been a long time since i played survive and my memory isn't that good #but i always remember the part where we had to protect the gomamon #and later they showed us a path via the dam allowing the team to continue exploring #it reminded me of just how important it is to be nice and do good things whenever and wherever possible #and be mindful with the not-so-good things you do and say #be it good or bad. karma is real even if you don't know when it will get back at you #and you know in visual novel settings. whatever choice you make really determines what happens later on #yeah believe it or not i end up thinking stuff like that by helping a bunch of adorable seal mons...#mmm i'm officially behind now so i might as well take my time while also rest a bit haha ;;#this week has been fun with survive week tho fr. even though i came in unprepared (when will i change)#gotta keep surviving #png

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skeletoninthemelonland · 16 days

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never lay down in bed right after eating. don't think about staying on your phone for nearly two hours in that position. don't sleep either. acid reflux is real and i hate that guy

#uhhhh eat healthy and drink water etc etc #yknow. the exhausting but healthy things we gotta do to keep our silly billy bodies workin #i hate how this adds up to anxious thoughts djsfjdsbhjqklfehpiJADAASFGHJIOPA #i tried drawing today but it felt so draining and pointless #the floods + university strike + the cold + lack of routine + overall anxious thoughts but ig everyone is going through it too #i'm just glad my house is not under water now. my pets and things are all here and i do have blankets to warm myself with #but damn.#when your mind is not occupied with the routine it starts bothering you with unwanted thoughts #and it's not good when everyone else at home is going through the same stress #it feels just as hopeless and stressful as it was during the covid pandemic #in a way we are 'under quarantine' and isolated. unsure if it's gonna directly affect our lives.#i heard the water levels are rising quickly and people are coming in seeking public shelters...#lol idk how this went from acid reflux back to the floods. see that it's def something we can't stop worrying about rn.#what if i wake up with water on my ankles tomorrow? the videos we saw showed the water coming in so fast it's fucking scary #there was no way to just pack everything and move before it got worse.#starbstalks

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corfisers · 3 months

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the thing about the dudebro discussion, the aita post, the willingness to just take at face value any accusations directed at a person you don't know, is that it's all so painfully transparent, it's so obvious that those conversations are happening at this scale specifically because it's about trans women. maybe it's just me, but you generally shouldn't be using certain terms for people unless you know that they are comfortable with them, and if you fucked up then apologize and move on (if we pretend for a second that the majority of dudebros weren't feign ignorance or just actively malicious to begin with). you should be aware that some things don't affect you the same way they affect other people, and you definitely shouldn't be giving those people potentially dangerous advice on topics that you personally aren't familiar with, this is the baseline, at least don't fucking put other people who were misled into trusting you in danger. and if an anon barges into your inbox with some wild accusations then you should stop and think "hey, why are you coming to me anonymously with no evidence to back any of this up, and in such a way that i have to reply to you publicly so more people get to see this" regardless of who it's directed at. like, those are all pretty simple things, or they should be at least, but because the targets are trans women and transmisogyny is so fucking rampant everyone has to bend over backwards to come up with excuses as to why treating trans women this way is perfectly normal and justified.

#transmisogyny #i'm not going too much into the aita thing because i've seen trans women express different opinions and i don't feel like it's my place #to talk over any of them. ik how i feel but i'm focusing on the part that i feel more confident about. which is don't give people advice #when you have no idea what you're talking about. like. those people trust you and turn to you for help and the least you could do is to say #“hey i'm sorry but i'm not the right person to ask”#i've been in a situation where a friend assumed i was tma and i didn't realize (i never said i was but we met in a game so like #minimum info outside of pronouns which were they/them at the time + some assumptions based on little things she knew about me like height)#and when she asked me about something that is not my lived experience i cleared things up. so the idea of just rolling with it instead #is so baffling to me. it's so irresponsible and disrespectful. it's hard enough already for transfems to trust people and you pull this?#the dudebro thing too. i hate being called a bitch (has nothing to do with gender) and ik that if i said so people would be like “yea ok”#could throw some completely genderless term in here as an example as well. people are usually fairly reasonable. but nooo not with dude #can't have the right to casually misgender a trans woman taken away from you. gotta make it look like that's not what you're doing either #infuriating and exhausting #benvey tag

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vermillioncrown · 7 months

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at the risk of sounding butthurt for talking about not being butthurt: going through quals really prepared me for trawling through fandom meta and research while keeping my zen

#redglyphs #opinionated verm #i have not seen another fandom as salty and divisive as the dc one #all the interesting meta and summaries come with this implicit ''you illiterate idiot'' vibe (exhausting)#or the ''we do what we want and fuck canon'' mindset is taken to the extreme end (simplistic and lacking nuance)#personally the visual style of a lot of western comics grates at me so it's hard to get into #but i do like the wack and fucked up dynamics of canon + trying to imagine a world/chronology around that #i like calibrating what i write around canon -> thus those meta&summary posters are very valuable and interesting to keep up with #i just gotta do 🙈 whenever they start to lambaste ''''fans'''' for not reading the comics/despised fanon reinterpretations of characters #''mmhmm yep. okay okay. i'm stupid. but let's get to why my blorbo is so fucked up bc of [whatever issue/run]''#like whatever they say they cannot roast me as hard as this one prof from my quals panel did #that prof is basically the successor of the academic lineage that established his discipline #and man utterly destroyed me during the exam #''you have no idea what you're talking about; you didn't even read taylor's hypothesis from 1941'' and i just let my soul evaporate lmao #anyways. i feel like fandom (all fandom and esp ones w sprawling canons) would benefit from two things:#1) willingness to learn (you gotta try to absorb some of the canon to transform it; ''know the rules to break them'')#2) willingness to accept limits (ppl are allowed to pick and choose; ''you gotta tolerate other ppl on the playground'')#and like. fucking chill out. we're all literally writing about some fictional dudes doing fictional things #rarely is a thing you dislike actually harmful rather than just distasteful (to you personally or broadly w/e)

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bearsbeetsbeskar · 1 year

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Alright y'all, here's a snippet of the joel x therapist! reader fic that I have embarked upon in the last couple days. Hopefully I can finish the first chapter by the weekend and post it.

Sidenote: thank you to everyone who has left comments on my rambly posts, encouraged me to write and been so supportive in general of newcomers to writing in this fandom. Joel is an intimidating character for sure but I actually had a lot of fun writing for him.

Pairing: Joel Miller x therapist!reader

Warnings: swearing, discussions about trauma

Summary: Life after moving to Jackson looks drastically different for Joel, survival mode is over and now he and Ellie can finally put down new roots. Ellie adapts easily but Joel finds himself struggling to settle into this new life, in more ways than some. At Ellie and Tommy’s insistence, Joel begrudgingly finds himself in therapy to try and work through his struggles but what he encounters is more than just painful memories and deeply rooted trauma.

“Tommy, I swear to god if you bring up this damn therapy shit again I won’t hesitate to shoot you next time we’re out on patrol,” Joel growled through clenched teeth, as he walked away from his brother into the kitchen of the house.

“Boy, it ain’t like I never heard that before,” Tommy quipped sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he followed Joel into the kitchen, pausing in the doorway as he leaned against the frame, hands shoved into his pockets. He observed his brother's rigid stance, the tightness in his shoulders, as Joel stood before the sink while looking out of the window above it.

This felt like the umpteenth time that Tommy had broached the subject of Joel getting help and talking to a ‘shrink’ as he dismissively described it, for his issues that he was struggling with. Joel was fine. He didn’t have any issues. He was doing just fine and didn’t need any help from some professional who would only scrutinize him, reduce him to his vices, and open old wounds from his past life. He was encouraged to go to grief counseling after Sarah died but by some grace of God, or whatever godforsaken omnipotent entity existed at that point, the outbreak occurred. Forget mental health, physical health and survival, aka not becoming infected, was the only thing that mattered.

Tommy exhaled softly, “Listen, I'm only suggestin’ it because I care about you. Ellie cares about you. You both have been through hell and back in the last year, I mean shit, we all have. But it seems like everything y’all went through is still affecting you, holding you back from letting your guard down and settling in here,” he states plainly, sadness lacing his tone.

“That’s bullshit Tommy and you know it,” Joel snaps, turning to face his younger brother and leaning back against the counter, arms crossed in defense. His gaze narrows, “I go out on patrol don’t I? Pick up extra shifts wherever it’s needed, help out with the contracting jobs, go out with Ellie in town.” Joel stood up taller, puffing out his chest, challenging his younger brother.

Tommy shook his head, running his hand over his face with an exasperated expression. Heaven forbid Joel did anything for himself that did not involve contributing or providing for someone, period. He just couldn’t shake that from his identity, and Tommy’s heart broke for him as he watched his brother’s stubborn pride, ridden with guilt and trauma, swallow him whole.

‘Man when are you gonna fuckin’ do something for yourself Joel?!” Tommy asserted, his frustration reaching a boiling point.

“Forget the damn commune, forget the community, forget Ellie for a sec and think about the last time YOU did something for yourself, the last time YOU reached out for help damn it” He pushed off the doorframe and crossed the threshold of the kitchen as he strode towards Joel.

“You’re not on the run anymore brother. You don’t have to just survive. You can have a life here. You can sleep without keeping one eye open and relax without looking over your shoulder. Don’t you want that? Don’t you think you deserve that?! Don’t you think you deserve this?!” as he gestured around to the cozy kitchen and fixed his older brother with a pleading stare.

Joel’s eyes widened as he tried to step back, the edge of the counter biting into his lower back as he took in Tommy’s weary face, the pain in his soft brown eyes, mirroring his own. His younger brother rarely raised his voice anymore. The outbreak took its toll on his hot headed temperament that never simmered down, even after he was discharged from the army. Joel knew that Tommy cared about him, hell he knew how deeply his brother loved him, after all they had been through respectively in the last 20 years, it had to be serious for him to raise his voice.

Joel opened his mouth, ready to bite back but his brother raised his hands in the air in surrender.

"Look, this is the last time I will bring this up, I swear. But yesterday I called up the therapist in town who’s been helpin’ folks out, and asked her about the therapy process and she seems real nice, and supportive. She said you could come in for a consultation and talk to her and see if you’re interested,” Tommy said quietly.

Joel’s gaze narrows as he scrunches his eyebrows together in incredulity, “You-”

“I had nothing to lose Joel. And neither do you,” Tommy cuts him off, raising his chin in defiance. “At least go talk to the therapist, if you don’t like her or you’re not feelin’ it, then I’ll drop it and let it go. The office is on the main street, just beside the clothing store, adjacent to the stables and they’re open everyday from 9-5.”

“Christ Tommy,” Joel leaned back as he looked up at the ceiling, wishing it would collapse in on him. Gotta love that brotherly love.

“Look I should be getting back now, Maria will be waiting for me. Here’s the number and address for the business. I’ll see you around okay?” Tommy patted through his pockets and retrieved a small piece of paper with writing scribbled on it, placing it on the counter beside Joel. He gave him a last placating look before he walked out of the kitchen, the front door closing behind him with a soft click.

Joel pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled sharply before turning back around to look out the kitchen window. He hung his head in defeat, rounding his back as rested his elbows on the counter and glared into his matte reflection in the sink. He didn’t need any help. He was doing fine. He’s still upright and breathing, with blood coursing through his veins isn’t he? Albeit, he is not jumping out of bed like a sprightly 30 year old anymore. His knees pop and crackle when he gets up from crouching over machinery while doing manual labour, his joints protest the next day when he pushes himself too far, moving slower than usual on job sites.

Hell, even his memory is starting to get cloudy around the edges. If it weren’t for Ellie some days, he’s sure he would leave the house without pants on, what with her always reminding him where things are in the house, special events that are coming up in the community that he forgets to put in the calendar. He had been a bit more snappy than usual, as Ellie so lovingly pointed out one day, but that’s nothing compared to his normal demeanor.

‘You’re becoming a grumpy motherfucker y'know that? Jeez, who shit in your cornflakes this morning?” she grumbled at him with a mouth full of cereal, after he snapped at her reminder that it was parent day at the local school. Parent day, P.A. day, Joel hadn’t dealt with any of this shit in over 20 years since Sarah was in school. Even then he managed to neglect many of the parental events, seeing as Sarah was the perfect student, with nothing but glowing reviews from her teachers. The fact that Ellie was going to school amidst a fucking apocalypse was enough for Joel to be happy with.

But still, he’s doing fine, right? Just fine.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x you #eeeeeek I am so nervous to post this even though it's a small snippet of the chapter #I'm actually getting more excited as I write #but it's exhausting like damn idk how you guys do it #there are so many ideas I have for conversations and interactions but then I gotta lay down some context for PLOT and I just wanna give up #I am lazy as hell I realized lol #but I felt like this interaction between the miller brothers was a good place to give a sneak peak #please give me feedback on what you think!

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m-for-now · 25 days

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Improving in your life is actually kinda hard and sucks, I'm gonna pretend I'm at the beginning of my anime arc now

#now this ones a hard one to tag #but can you tell i've just rewatched the Inarizaki match in Haikyuu?#probably not actually #but like damn #i'm gonna pretend Kita is someone i actually met #shinsuke kita #haikyuu kita #this is so random #writing this at almost 1am while eating slightly over-salted pasta after not being able to be productive on a day #(due to slight physical exhaustion and pain)#this is the regular #“i'm questioning my life in the middle of the night because what am i even doing”#do i ... do i tag this with HQ!!?#i only mentioned Kita in the tags...#well it can't hurt #pls Haikyuu people feel free to ignore this #haikyuu!!#inarizaki #haikyuu #honestly i could start getting into blue lock in the tags...#idk how many i have left though; i'm kinda just rambling #i hope no one wastes their time reading these #it's mostly to distract from my over-salted food #bc i was hungry but i'm too tired and would feel too bad throwing it away to get new food #it's not actually That bad #this is kinda pointless but hey #let's hope i can start my anime journey of kinda getting my shit together after i've slept #(i told myself this 500 times by now but like... it's gotta work at Some point)#and also ngl Haikyuu just kinda makes you wanna be A Person #i love all the arcs and motives and views and stuff. it's genuinely awesome

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plexippusangel · 3 months

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I either need to accept that I am just a way stronger person than this friend and can handle way more while still being able to engage with the world as a person, or recognize excuses as excuses, accept that I am not valued and be done or. Maybe both. Idk. It might be somewhere between the two. I am just sick of regular life stuff rendering him unable to spend any time with me, and of him being unable to bear any of the details of my life, when I would move mountains to rekindle our friendship. Though I'm starting to wonder if I still would.

#faer personal files #i just. really didn't want officiating his wedding to be our last hurrah of friendship even though i did kind of feel it coming #also i'm really sick of being infantilized for my chronic fatigue i am a grown adult and i know what i'm capable of #ugh. maybe i'm just being awful and not understanding in which case i'm too much of a rancid person to be his friend i guess #but i don't think that's the case #idk i'll never forget when i couldn't see this dude for a year even masked up outside for covid but when another of our old friends came up #from her job doing COVID RELATED CROWD CONTROL FOR THE FUCKING ARMY he went on a hike with her mask off #and i think that says a lot about what our friendship's been for years honestly. if he can't bear my company idk why i try #if i'm just an interesting prop for conversations and occasions but not a friend. i can't accept that #i am an interesting prop for conversations. the disabled genderfluid bisexual genius who lost everything bc of said disability #but i didn't lose everything i just have to fucking rebuild on new ground. and i am doing that. i whine on occasion but i am so strong #and i do know how to interact with people without traumadumping i haven't on him in YEARS but his concept of me crystalized at age 21 #or something like that i guess. idk it just breaks my heart #bc for a long time he was my person. he was the only person who knew the authentic me. more even than my sisters at times.#and yeah that was a little unhealthy but at the time he craved that!!!#and then i grew up and stopped needing him like that around the same time he stopped wanting that and it should have been fucking fine #but like. even senior year of college when i was sick it was already starting to fall apart #like i remember being on a small hike once being exhausted and jokingly being like you gotta carry me back and then being like #no really i might actually need an arm to lean on by the end of this walk if i'm gonna make it back to the car i really don't know if i can #and he said no bc he didn't want to look straight. who the fuck CARES??? i could barely walk i was stumbling my way back annoying him going #too slow. fuck. and that really has been what our friendship has been for years. the minute my house wasn't the most convenient place it wa #more or less dead idk why i keep dragging this horse around #idk why i keep letting him break my heart like this it's so stupid he's never gonna care about me like he did when i was quick and brillian #but never quite as smart as him in his view. fuck him. i'm smarter. just bc i was a little gullible or paranoid at times bc of the #FUCKING CPTSD doesn't mean i was dumber than him. the fuck??? there's something wrong with me i swear idk why i hang on #anyway i'm irritated. but i'm also reluctant to throw away somebody who's seen me through key points in my life. so.

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lovvelorrn · 7 months

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twitter swifties are the most vile, horrible and despicable people i've ever met

#and i haven't met them THANK GOD #what the hell's going on with the travis' tweets like.#literally unemployed bitches with nothing better to do huh? can't you read a book? watch a movie? go for a walk?#it's so exhausting having to encounter all the shit i gotta encounter every fucking day #the joe slander (which i don't care about joe but what the fuck is that about)#the way they keep looking for proof that travis + taylor's relationship is pr whilst THRISTING over the kiss they shared on saturday #it's frankly disgusting and it feels like reading the mental breakdown of a teenager and i don't care to witness that i really don't #anyway this was so heavy i'm sorry lmao i'm just done. so done.#taylor swift #twitter swifties

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cheekblush · 9 months

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so how are you supposed to get anything done when you work 40 hours a week?

#how do people do this??? it's absolutely insane #is this how it's gonna be for the rest of my life????#and all this for barely any money too?????#i'm constantly exhausted and i don't even hate my job but the working hours are excruciating #idk how people do this who have kids and families they need to tend to AFTER work #i'm so fortunate that i get to come home to a cooked meal but i know that won't last forever either #if i had to cook after a 10 hour shift i would really kms #i really have so much respect for people who work full time + take care of their family & do house chores #i can't even find the energy to clean up my room....#no this is truly insane like the world is so beautiful and that's what humans decided to do with it???#you have to work your whole life just in order to afford to live......#and by the time you can retire and actually have free time you're too old and sickly to enjoy it #gotta love capitalism #i wish i was a bird....#i sound like a child but like..... this just can't be all there is to life?????#☁️

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tkbrokkoli · 1 year

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a colleague of mine used to be a professional athlete in the 80s and today she showed me and another colleague photographs from back then and she casually mentioned that two of her team mates outed themselves as trans men and two as lesbians later in life and i was like !!!!!! im

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tachiisms · 2 years

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#tfw you decide to do a thing but have accepted that sideblogs don't work for you so you go to set up a new blog #but want the sideblog's url and go to switch 'em but forget that old urls are held for 24 hours and you feel silly lol #(I mean do I still have access to the old original not-side blog? yes. but do I want something fresh? yeah it feels right for that blog)#making all the disclaimers and 'this is what is and isn't canon on this blog' is exhausting though I feel like people aren't gonna like it #but tbh trying to be super flexible with that was what killed the muse the first two times so I gotta.#(if you know what character I'm talking about consider this your virtual cookie for being correct)#ooc

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imwritesometimes · 2 years

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It's 2am and it's quite literally freezing but you're up anyway carefully picking through rarepair fics. it's 2am and it's quite literally freezing but you're up anyway cause the blorbos are being so tender together

#the jard.eth brain rot y'all. it has a choke hold. there are only like 4 pages of fic grand total. a lot I've already read years ago. but.#the blorbos. it's 2am and it's freezing but I'm rotating the blorbos.#and now every day at like 2-3am I'm like oh. ideas. they could....#and then I'm like ok but you already snapped and wrote 7 chapters of scenes from a stilted courtship #but that is my weakness. I can think of 918792 different ways a ship could pine. long. flirt. yearn.#it's 2am and I'm still on my bullshit idk what to do abt it 🤷‍♀️#I just have so many thoughts. and feelings. and scenarios. like huffing the exhaust from god's buick. I gotta sleep.#erin explains it all

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unlucky-lemon · 22 days

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HOW MANY TAGS AND WORDS MUST I FILTER TO HAVE A MOMENT OF HAHA FUNNY FANDOM TIME ON THIS GODDAMN WEBBED SITE

#I'm not saying I dont care about whats going on #its just exhausting having it constantly shoved in my face on all media platforms #tv and in papers and magazines #on campus fliers and talked about in every day conversation #I feel powerless and all I want to do is get through finals without offing myself #and this shit isnt making it any easier #its hard to care when you cant contribute in a way that matters #ffs #fuck me for being an asshole though I guess #for not caring about something I cant change #this semester has been utter fucking hell #my cat passed a month after it started and I couldn't take a break #I miss her so bad and yet if I dont care about other stuff and other people im a heartless asshole #I gotta take care of ME #it feels selfish to protect my peace #fucking hell #im so fucking done #i would love to take a break from socials but I dont have the self control #rant #personal #venting #vent post

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