#stede is the best dressed captain of caribbean | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

daria-meoi · 5 months

Text

Thought I'd give it a try. In response to this post from @piratecaptainscaptainpirates

Ended up ranking a bunch of first and last and shovelling the rest in the middle without particular consideration for their placement. That middle section is in no way set in stone.

The Innkeeper, s2e03. My go to comfort episode. And knowing the amount of work and love put into its final minutes makes me ecstatic about it. Had it on a loop in the background at some point.

The Pilot, s1e01. I just love it. Meeting everyone for the first time, Stede is adorable, he has glasses (which are the loml actually and the only reason I keep watching this stupid show is my hope to see them again), and dressing up as a bunch of fancy boys, and the British arseholes, officer Hornberry, and Nigel, an all. Just the right amount of quirkiness for my taste. It is incredible. I'd probably have put it in the first place if it weren't occupied already.

Act of Grace, s1e09. Love from the start to the end. The whole interrogation sequence, the Crew, all of them and every one in particular, the great punch, Chauncey, Hornberry, this man is a fearsome pirate, soft desperate touches, the king George himself overthinking things as usual, boys' outfits in the academy (I see a person in those breeches, shirt, socks and shoes - I offer them my hand in marriage. It's a reflex), the kiss and soft touches again, Ed's delight and the most baby Stede's face. And the heartbreak.

This is Happening, s1e07. I love the way the world expands and deepens and breathes there. I love Jim's storyline. Olu shines. The Swede. Nana is bonkers and horrible and toxic and great and "my only family", which will be paralleled later to a certain other toxic character. And Blackbeard's Bar&Grill&Other Delicacies&Delights&Fishing Equipment and Snake Snacks. And Lucius' intervention and speech which I'm unable to repeat at a fraction of the same speed for the life of me.

Fun and Games, s2e04. I can't believe myself now. On the first watch when Stede approached Ed under the blanket I was, to put it mildly, very cautious about the perspective of them actually talking it through on screen. Because talking it through on screen is a very tricky business when the viewer knows more than the characters. I can imagine a thousand ways of making it tedious and cringey to watch. But it turned out so very lovely. Unbelievably lovely. You wrote me a lovely talk-it-through!

We Gull Way Back, s1e08. Calico Jack is nauseating. But he had to be like that. Get off my ship. Now. Morning, Captain. No, it isn't. The telescope and the black (or rather red) eye. The Chain ❤️

The Best Revenge is Dressing Well, s1e05. I love their fancy outfits with a wig and flowers and little bows. And the pyramid scheme. And Stede's delight in causing havoc. And the moonlit chickening out.

Red Flags, s2e02. It is heartbreaking. And real. And heartbreaking. You have hope, it's cute. And Ed is insane[ly beautiful]. And heartbreaking.

Impossible Birds, s2e01. Because it feels so fucking real. And I'm afraid your life is better without me. And brings me flashbacks of me crashing wall tiles in a sliiiiiiightly similar situation. Thank goodness I never had a gun.

The Art of Fuckery, s1e06. It was a wonderful fuckery. Stede's stabbing face 😅 I'm a witch and this is my cat. Miao. And I'm your friend. And did I do it right?

The Gentleman Pirate, s1e03. The Cream of the Caribbean and the Genital Pirate. You've heard of me? Also blood does look good on all white garments as internet warriors should know.

A Damned Man, s1e02. Oh, please move! I probably have children, Bonnet. They will never see papa again! I'm a dirty filthy murderer! Take me away! Don't you trifle! He does have the eyes of a madman. Sorry, you do.

Mermen, s2e08. It's long overdue to put it somewhere. Let it be here. Because it was good and it made me feel good. And it finally stopped that torture, which had been the fandom experience up to this point with constant "Aha, eat your shit, Izzy-haters! We always knew he was a blameless little angel! And we are getting all so validated!" And turned it into a different one.

Discomfort in a Married State, s1e04. I don't know why it's so low. It is wonderful all the way through. I love it.

Wherever You Go, There You Are, s1e10. I love Mary. And Evelyn. Stede is painful to watch. But I loved the "unhand me or bleed" thing. Yes, baby, you have it in you, together with all the soft and frilly things. I'm here for it. Just choose your subject wisely next time and maybe don't drink so much. Ed is heartbreaking. Cutting the toe was frankly cathartic. Loved it (as a vindictive dick I am at heart) and hated it (for Ed's sake) simultaneously. And it ends on a hopeful note.

Man on Fire, s2e07. It is a good episode I suppose. Lots of things happening. Lots to love. But it pains me. And the characters and their doings cringe me at places. And I'm not strong enough for it.

The Curse of the Seafaring Life, s2e05. Oh, hello, it's me, and I'm unpredictable sometimes. I love my boy in his suit. And the revisiting of the moonlight scene, and the thumbs war, and "you won". But the episode as a whole felt like a filler and a waste of opportunity and time in a timewise constricted season.

Calipso's Birthday, s2e06. It feels like a cushion after you pull it out of a washing machine - all the stuffing is a lumpy wet mess here and there, the rest is just a sad empty sack. Also "poison into positivity" repeated again and again in a clanky way like a ball bearing in a spray paint can. It was driving me crazy and throwing me out of the story and into a filming set, where actors are failing to find a way to say a particular line from the script and instead of dropping it or replacing it with something more organic, power through, with, well, that exact clanking result. I loved Ned Low though, he was cute. And the kiss and the curtain thing were hot as the fucking, which followed.

#ofmd #no one in their right mind will read it i suppose

1 note · View note

ithoughtiwasslender · 2 years

Text

from shitpost to reality. an ldr song for stede in every episode. enjoy.

e1 “pilot” - ride

my family is here now, at sea / ive been out on that open road, you can be my full-time, daddy, white and gold

e2 “a dammed man” - hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have (but i have it)

you’re dead and im not listening / smiling for miles in pink dresses and high heels on white yachts, but ive been tearing around in my fucking nightgown, 24-7 sylvia plath

e3 “a gentleman pirate” - gods & monsters

please join me in welcoming for his regional debut the brigand of barbados, the cream of the caribbean, the gentleman pirate / in the land of gods and monsters i was an angel looking to get fucked hard, like a groupie incognito posing as a real singer

e4 "discomfort in a married state" - off to the races

an open fire on a wooden vessel surrounded by bits of paper. you're a fucking lunatic, and i like it. / and we're off to the races, places ready, set, the gate is down and now we're goin' in

e5 "the best revenge is dressing well" - national anthem

you're in over your head. these are my people. i'll deal with it. / i'm your national anthem, boy, put your hands up, give me a standing ovation

e6 “the art of fuckery” - yayo

we should cross paths with a dutch merchant ship tomorrow night. i thought we could take it through a bit of fuckery / let me put on a show for you, daddy, let me put on a show

e7 “this is happening” - you can be the boss

i don't know if i agree that a ship can only have one captain / you can be the boss, daddy, you can be the boss

e8 “we gull way back” - music to watch boys to

they’re the furthest thing from my mind. that’s why i’ve got the telescope / oh i see you’re going, so i put on my music watch you leave

e9 “act of grace” - living legend

but you're blackbeard. you can’t be blackbeard without your black beard / and baby all the things you do, and the ways you move, send me straight to heaven, and baby you, you really are my living legend

e10 “whenever you go, there you are” - bel air

to stede bonnet. complicated, hard-headed. really quite irritating at times. and finally free / so i run like i'm mad to heaven's door, i don't wanna be bad, i won't cheat you no more, darling i'm waiting to greet you

#stede bonnet #our flag means death #fanmix #daddys crazy little baby on the pirate ship. said it before and ill say it again!#much like the show this was all giggles until i got to e9 tbh then i had. a sincere emotion.

0 notes