#theoretically allow him to see god again

[cynicalalpaca]

I should post this here too, shouldn't I?

Explanations under the cut

Astarion: Thief of Blood.  Along with the obvious fact that he steals literal blood, his initial plan is to manipulate the player into liking him, “stealing” a bond with them for his protection.  And that was basically his m.o. for 200 years.  If he Ascends, he would turn into a Lord of Blood

Shadowheart: Maid of Heart.  I imagine that she’s spent most of her life inverted as a Bard of Mind, allowing her mind to be destroyed by the Sharrans.  The Maid of Heart is, well, made of their own identity.  It’s a creation class, and Shart is spending the rest of her life creating herself.  If she became a Dark Justiciar, she would remain a Bard of Mind

Gale: Mage of Light.  The active understanding class and the knowledge aspect fit the resident nerd of the group, don’t you think?  He’s probably the smartest party member (in terms of academic/theoretic knowledge) and uses that knowledge to power his magic.  In addition, Light is associated with relevancy and acknowledgement and boy oh boy was he desperate for Mystra’s.  If he becomes the God of Ambition, he would turn into a Lord of Light

Lae’zel: Prince of Breath.  I know the general understanding of Prince is that they destroy the aspect, but I understand them as also being able to destroy through use of their aspect.  Lae’zel is destroying Vlaakith’s empire by freeing the githyanki people and leading a revolution.  Maybe a bit of a stretch, but I was trying to avoid overlap for the origin characters.  I could also see her as a Knight or Prince of Blood

Karlach: Knight of Rage.  She’s a berserker, she fights by utilizing rage.  And the popular idea that Knights start out lacking in their aspect is pretty apt too, she’s an extremely positive person while Rage is all about more negative emotions.  I think she might ghost her inverted class- Rogue of Hope- but never fully inverts, just toys with distributing hope and positivity.

Wyll: Heir of Hope.  I fully admit Wyll kinda got the short end of the stick as he was the last character I did, but I do think it fits.  Heirs passively manipulate or inspire their aspect in others, and Wyll fights for the people as the Blade of Frontiers, inspiring Hope in those he protects.  I could also see him as a Blood aspect, as so much of his story deals with his bonds- to his father, Mizora, Baldur’s Gate and the people of the Coast

Minthara: Maid of Doom.  This is where I stopped caring about overlap lol.  Minthara is your most “evil” companion and one who approves of killing people in your way.  Doom was a pretty clear choice for her, being the Aspect of death, but also dealing with systems and authority, like the Cult of the Absolute and her place in its hierarchy.  As for her class, Maids create their aspect and make it a core part of themselves.  Minthara has been surrounded by death and hierarchies her whole life, having been born to a high ranking noble house in Menzoberranzan, leading to them being a very core part of her being.  I can also see her vacillating wildly between Maid of Doom and her inverse, Bard of Life, because she’s just that chaotic.  They both deal with death, but the Bard is a bit more passive about it, allowing others (the Cult, the player) to take lead on the killing

Halsin: Knight of Breath.  Again running with the “Knights lack their Aspect” theory, Halsin starts the game lacking the freedom he desires.  He’s literally imprisoned by the goblins, but he’s also constrained by his role as Archdruid, almost toying with his inverse of Rogue of Blood.  He craves the freedom of nature and jumps at the opportunity to gain it.  You could also argue wildshape is a form of freedom (both of form and of self) that he uses to fight.  There’s also his talk of polyamory and how he doesn’t want to be tied down.  Freedom is a recurring thing with the guy

Jaheira: Witch of Life.  Life is a pretty clear choice for a druid, as Life deals with flora and fauna.  Witch is the active manipulation class, and Jaheira is introduced manipulating plants to hold the player.  Additionally, she’s shown nurturing life by caring for various children in Baldur’s Gate, sorta like how Feferi took care of various marine animals

Minsc: Knight of Hope.  Okay this was the hardest one for me because I don’t fully get Minsc.  I’ve only played BG3, I don’t know him from any other games or comics or whatever.  But from what I do know, he was obviously one of the more offensive and active classes and Knight seems to fit him best.  He utilizes Hope- usually in the form of others’ trust in him- to fight.  Without that trust, he wouldn’t be as effective, he always fights best with his companions.  He’s also just a happy, up-beat guy, and Hope is largely focused on positive emotions

Boo: Lord of Doom.  BOO DECIDES THE FATE OF ALL.  HE HAS ULTIMATE SAY OVER LIFE AND DEATH

#Baldur's Gate 3 #BG3 #Baldurs Gate 3 #Baldur's Gate #Baldurs Gate #Homestuck #No i'm not sorry for doing this #Astarion #Shadowheart #Gale #Lae'zel #Karlach #Wyll Ravenguard #Minthara #Halsin #Jaheira #Minsc

[vicioux]

ICHIHIME FIC RECS

i can't believe i've been reading ichihime fanfics for literally 10 years ✌️ my favorite flavor is definitely pining with a touch of angst, but i am also a sucker for just them giggly all over each other! thank you bleach TYBW anime revival for bringing me back to these two cutie patooties and an even bigger thank you to all the writers that have been keeping the fandom alive all these years (especially in the earlier days back in the wild wild west of ff.net and LJ lol) y'all are amazing 💖 happy reading everyone p.s you can find the rest of my fic rec lists here

🍓 alternate universe 🍞

THE BRIDE OF THE DEATH GOD by caledon A plague descended upon the village, and to appease the God of Death they offered him a bride as a sacrifice.

THE DEVIL'S PLAYTHING by marshmallowbirb High-schooler Kurosaki Ichigo discovers that he isn't as human as he once thought - and neither is his classmate, Inoue Orihime.

THE RELUCTANT BRIDEGROOM, DEATH by marshmallowbirb On a sunny summer morning, the young goddess Orihime gathers flowers on a hillside.

STARCROSS'D by child of the ashes In the vampire palace of Los Noches, there is no greater curse than beauty, and no greater crime than love.

NEXT VISIT by aurona x She can see him only with autumn comes, that man of the deep blue tree. And over the years, her love for him grows.

MOTHERHOOD by ashe flyght Orihime's family is financially unstable. So when Japan's most in demand actor, Kurosaki Ichigo offers her an unusual job will she accept it?

FINE LINES by lastlynotleast Ichigo is a tattoo artist and Orihime has skin he could draw on forever.

🍓 multichapter 🍞

THE BOND BETWEEN US by ritsu-san Post Ch. 352: Ichigo and Orihime are left to figure out this strange bond they share.

TIL DEATH DO US PART by marshmallowbirb Deemed too powerful, Ichigo is sequestered in Soul Society after defeating Aizen. Ten years later, one of his human friends dies.

THE CLOCKWORK SWITCH by sesamerolls (1 // 2 // 3) “Kurosaki-kun?” She wanted to bite back her words. This person couldn’t be him. He was a few inches taller, broader, and manlier than the youth who gave her daifuku just minutes before.

🍓 oneshots that will make you feeeeel 🍞

DEMAGNETIZE by ghosty If opposites attract, then what does that mean for us?

TACTILE by mrhooty Orihime has accepted that her boundaries will never be respected, but Ichigo is too good of a friend to allow that.

AFFIRMATION by sesamerolls Ichihime from the beginning to the end.

HOME IS WHERE THE SUN SETS by awkwardspaceturtle Using the word ‘beautiful’ didn’t seem like enough; nothing he could ever say out loud would tell her how she really looked in his eyes.

BUILD A HOUSE IN PARADISE by zabiume Ichigo and Orihime move in together.

PAPER HOUSES by zabiume Mostly, he just wanted to know if she was okay, if she was eating well and passing her courses and if, when she went to bed at night, she had someone to smile about.

PROMPTFILL by zabiume Truth serum induced angst.

PROMPTFILL by captainrukias-husband Ichigo writes a poem for Orihime.

TEMPTARE BEAST by mayelisa As Orihime watched in horror as Ichigo took on that form again, she had a sinking feeling that this day wouldn't turn out at all like she had planned.

MEMORIES IN THE RAIN by garden of magnolias If I were the rain, could I connect with someone's heart, as the rain can unite the eternally separated earth and sky?

ALWAYS SUMMER by folle Orihime is calling, calling, and Ichigo doesn't know how to not answer, except in the most important way.

BECOMING WHOLE by lovelycollision He loves her in various ways, during different stages of his life. It's after the war when he realizes that he's in the third stage, otherwise known as the beginning.

🍓 outside POV looking in 🍞

ELEVATING by sesamerolls “Okay, let’s theoretically agree Ichi-nii has a girlfriend,” said Karin, resting her palm underneath her chin.

SIMPLY BY MEASUREMENT by sesamerolls When it first began, he pretended not to notice.

PROMPTFILL by scribblles Ichigo screwed up his befuddlement into a distinctly grumpy expression. “For your information, I wasn’t daydreaming, I was thinking. Worrying, actually. And it’s about a friend. Who… happens to be a girl.”

🍓 funny fluffy oneshots 🍞

OF MICE AND MEN by garden of magnolias Ichigo realizes that getting rid of a mouse in his and Orihime's apartment is a lot more complicated when it involves his girlfriend.

I REJECT! by scribblles Keigo has a rare moment of inadvertent correctness.

RUMOUR HAS IT by fictionaryplace Ichigo and Orihime have important news, but decide to have a little fun with their friends and family before coming clean.

DELAYED REACTION by crystal dawn Orihime is feeling under the weather. Against his better judgment, Ichigo suggests she visit his father's clinic.

ICED FRAPPUCCINO by hedonysms Ichigo and Orihime get a coffee. Ichigo is simultaneously an emotional sap and a horny, utterly repressed man.

STARTING FRESH by kay sincere Ichigo doesn't have a resolution for the new year himself. But it does come to his attention that his friends could use his help.

NOSEBLEED by deathberryhime Where that little smile would have done more damage than intended to.

OUR BREATHS IN PERFECT HARMONY by iwillhaveamoonbase When Ichigo's friend talks about a cute girl at a bakery, Ichigo agrees to introduce them with no idea that the girl in question is his girlfriend.

WELL WISHERS by adverb_slut It turns out that shinigami are not so great at gift-buying, especially for a four-week-old baby.

THE ART OF SHIPPING by alice hattercandy In which, everyone ships. Even Ichigo.

🍓 anything and everything by these authors 🍞

SESAMEROLLS CAPTAINRUKIAS-HUSBAND ZABIUME (tumblr // ao3) SCRIBBLLES CRYSTALDAWN / MARSHMALLOWBIRB (ffnet // ao3) ORIHIMES RITSU-SAN (more on their LJ sunburnt-wings) TRAGICOMEDY (more on their LJ explicates)

#ichihime #ichigo kurosaki #orihime inoue #ichigo x orihime #ichiori #bleach #bleach fanfiction #ichihime fanfiction #ichihime fanfic #ichihime fic #vicioux fic rec #fic rec #ficrec #fic recs #fic rec list #masterpost #masterlist #this was actually massive like 100+ but i couldnt wrangle all the links :c #logged into ffnet for this #i prefer reading on ao3 so linked there if crossposted

[accio-victuuri]

12/30/2023: LRLG Update

i didn’t expect this omg. and so early in the morning? thank you for sending this to us right now instead of 31st and as if yesterday wasn’t busy enough so they do this to us now. i’m looking at the 9:05 kadian tho. maybe they wanted to get that as well.

and it’s so long too! this one is basically your usual scenarios of either them together or talking to each other over the phone. i’m not giving too much commentary, just enjoy it for what it is and this feels like one of those lrlg that won’t make much sense till something happens after. and that’s the best kind of fake rumor, when we think nothing of it now but it turns out to be crucial in the future.

anyway, let us see what’s going on here. ⬇️⬇️⬇️

WYB: "Oh, don't do this"

XZ: "cute"

WYB: "Don't send it"

XZ: "Yeah, okay, okay"

👩‍🦳: "Water soaked astragalus"

XZ: "Looks like cold medicine

👩‍🦳: "The only difference is that this one won't melt."

XZ: "Can this even be eaten?"

👩‍🦳: "Well...theoretically it's possible"

WYB: "It's all soaked in water, so don't eat the dregs."

XZ: "I'm done with your wisdom."

WYB: "You're not allowed to say anything?"

XZ: “I don’t want to be honest and say it directly.”

WYB: "oh".

* I don’t know what the hell they could possibly be talking about here which is normal for LRLG scenarios lol. maybe we will know more as the days and months pass by!

====

XZ: "Didn't you order fruit?"

WYB: “Isn’t it here? You ordered before ordering food.”

XZ: “Who ordered it?”

WYB: "You're not looking"

XZ: "I was looking at what I wanted to eat and I didn't order anything."

👩‍🦳: "Uh...we thought you two ordered it but we didn't."

WYB: "Order now to finish your meal."

👩‍🦳: "Okay, I'll order now"

XZ: "You don't need to eat."

WYB: "My interface can't be switched for that long."

WYB: "I thought you just ordered it."

WYB: "Isn't it because Brother X is not causing trouble here?"

WYB: "But I ordered coffee for you."

WYB: "I will give you some fruit now. It will definitely arrive after dinner."

XZ: "No, I won't eat today.

XZ: “This dish is of a good quality, please try it”

👩‍🦳: “I ordered it before and the boss said it was delicious. I’ll order one for you to try.”

XZ: “The food is average”

WYB: "Hey, it's objective."

* XZ being the picky eater 😂😂😂 it still warms my heart how they make a big deal of having a meal with each other and include the staff.

=====

👩‍🦳: "It's all on the inside and outside. If there's something wrong, I'll correct it directly."

XZ: "Relax, your boss is easy to work with."

👩‍🦳: 😳

WYB: "He's just so easy to get along with now. Once you get to know him, you won't notice anymore.

XZ: I said you.

WYB: Oh

👩‍🦳: you are really good

* I’m cry laughing omggggg 😂😂😂 wyb be clowning and implying that XZ is gonna be a good boss now but maybe more strict in the future. Not knowing that XZ was actually talking about him ( yibo ) being easy to work with. AHHHHHH! Yibo is good boss!!!!

======

this next part is them playing and wyb is like, i will take you ( xz ) to fight. and xz is eye roll emoji. lol. i can’t help but think about that bts where xz says wyb gets happiness over him losing 😂😂😂

======

WYB: Come on, transfer the money

XZ: No money

WYB: Then I'll buy something and you can pay for it on my behalf

XZ: No money

WYB: I have with my strengths

XZ: Then based on my strengths i don’t have money

WYB: You can't keep saying ‘no money’

XZ: Then send it to me

WYB: And then what?

XZ: Then I have money

WYB: Yes

* LOL XZ! No money? aren’t you the god of wealth???

======

WYB: "Is this frozen?"

👩‍🦳: "This is the effect produced by palm wax"

WYB: "Like ice

👩‍🦳: “It’s fun”

WYB: "How many are there?"

👩‍🦳: "Made five"

WYB: "give me one"

👩‍🦳: "For both of you"

👩‍🦳: “With added essential oils”

* here we go again with WYB and his love for candles with essential oils! and i love how the person is talking to immediately offers to give two for both of them, so whoever this is knows about it. we don’t know if the person is their staff or an acquaintance.

and later on, it’s implied that they are on video call

WYB: "Look at the magic"

WYB:“Does it look like it’s frozen?”

WYB:"I asked for one XX for you and gave two."

WYB: "Wait until I send you one and then take one home."

* my god! it’s so cute!!! The mundane things that make them happy and talk about!

then the woman says what she has is not enough and will make more.

====

this next part is full of WYB speaking.

"No, no need to wait, I'll tell you."

“It’s super cold but I’m okay and I can survive it.”

"I've been telling you for a long time. Did you hear me cough?"

"Oh, you are like Wangwang senbei, I can't compare to you."

"If you say it looks good, then it looks good."

“Look at me, look at me”

“is this okay”

“Can you just take a screenshot?”

"What expression should I take later?"

“Did you see what I'm wearing? Can you choose something serious?”

* I’m imagining WYB showing off his outfits to XZ for his recent red carpet events. Even if they are not together, look at them always taking the time to talk and be present for each other 🥹🥹🥹🥹

=====

the last convo is wyb talking to his staff and the topic is someone’s dog and it’s being shown to WYB.

=====

lrlg gives us a small message and talks about the end of the year and how all tasks should be finished, but most importantly they wish us : Happy New Year. Getting better and better!

which is zz and wyb’s usual message and wish for themselves and other people.

-END.

#yizhan #bjyx #there is no science here i’m just clowning i always do #sorry this seems rushed!!! i literally have to take a shower and be out the door lol #what a great day!!!! #they have really been spoiling us in the days leading up to the end of year!

[mol1703]

So in my last post I made a playlist for huskerdust. And on that I added “The Winner Takes It All” by ABBA.

It is SO HUSKERDUST. Just hear me out.

I imagine it is Angel singing this to Husk after confessing his feelings to him. He thinks Husk doesn’t want him and uses Husk’s (theoretical) past relationships to counter Husk’s own confession.

I don't wanna talk

About things we've gone through

- This line referring to both Angel and Husks deals.

Though it's hurting me

Now it's history

I've played all my cards

- Angel thinks he’s funny cause lol “cards”Same for the next line as well.

And that's what you've done, too

No more ace to play

- Angel doesn’t want to talk about his past but Husk is just as hesitant if not more.

The winner takes it all

The loser standing small

That’s her destiny

- Angel sees Husk as some kind of winner because he believes Husk being with him will do him no good, but in return he is the “loser” (lol) because he will never get to be with Husk like he wants.

I was in your arms

Thinking I belonged there

I figured it made sense

Building me a fence

Building me a home

Thinking I'd be strong there

- Angel and Husk were getting close and Angel believed they could work together, but with their deals thinks it will not work out. He also mentions how the hotel became a safe space for him and how Husk was a big part of that.

The gods may throw the dice

Their minds as cold as ice

And someone way down here

Loses someone dear

The winner takes it all (Takes it all)

The loser has to fall (Has to fall)

It's simple and it's plain (It seems plain)

Why should I complain? (Why complain)

- Again Angel thinks he’s funny cause “dice.” Angel’s life on earth was shit and he was given a crap hand.

- “loses someone dear” would be Angel referring to Molly.

- Finally he believes he deserves all of the shit he deals with because he “did it to himself” lol no you didn’t.

But tell me, does she kiss

Like I used to kiss you?

Does it feel the same

When she calls your name?

Somewhere deep inside

You must know I miss you

But what can I say?

Rules must be obeyed

- In this head canon I have Husk makes Angel aware of his past relationships and Angel kind of throws it in his face to make Husk see how he’s not good for him.

- Angel makes his feelings for Husk known but goes back to his earlier point of how their contracts would never allow them to be together.

The judges will decide (They decide)

The likes of me abide (We abide)

Spectators of the show (Of the show)

…

A lover or a friend (Or a friend)

- The judges being Alastor and Valentino.

- Spectators being Charlie, Vaggie, Nifty and so on.

- And Angel wanting Husk in a capacity even if they cannot be together romantically he needs Husk in his life.

I don’t wanna talk

If it makes you feel sad

And I understand

…

I apologise

If it makes you feel bad

Seeing me so tense

No self-confidence

- Angel thinks Husk does not reciprocate his feelings so Angel wants to give him an out.

- Husky has previously mentioned how Angel’s self confidence is hot.

Can you tell I have thought about this way too much? This could end however you decide, but this song hits hard for these too and also in Mama Mia, so I highly recommend it.





#huskerdust #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin hotel #hazbin angel dust #music #abba #musicals #your honor they are in love #confession #found family

[youcouldmakealife]

LBTE: Jared (149-150)

In which Jared is the last to find out about his sister's new boyfriend, and he takes it just as calmly as you'd expect.

If you would like to follow along the series page is here.

“Um,” Jared says, when he opens the front door of their apartment to find Bryce beaming right at him.

Like, right at him. Like if Jared had swung open the door without paying attention he might have smacked Bryce right in his beautiful face.

Literally ran to the door like a puppy hearing its human come home.

“I’m allowed to train again!” Bryce says.

“Like,” Jared says. “Very carefully?”

“Very carefully,” Bryce confirms, and then, as if he’s trying to completely undermine Jared’s confidence that he’ll take that advice seriously, bolts into the living room at high speed.

A puppy with the zoomies.

Jared catches “—sorry, had to tell Jared—“, which he thinks means Bryce literally dropped everything to tell him, everything presumably being a call with Elaine. Though it could be someone else, Jared supposes. Theoretically.

“—love you too, mom,” Bryce says, then reappears so quickly Jared thinks he bolted right back.

Zoom zoom. (To no one’s surprise, he did — albeit with ‘one sec I think Jared’s home’ first. Elaine didn’t mind)

“Come on!” Bryce says, and that’s how Jared caps off an entire day at the gym by going to another, closer gym, and trying not to helicopter husband, partly because they’re in public, and partly because Bryce might bite his head off if he gets between him and the equipment after a long absence.

Relationship with Jared over, now gym equipment is Bryce’s best friend.

Jared says nothing, even when a piece of penne lands on the carpet. Bryce is too happy about all the complaining he’s doing to deflate him. And it’s not like Jared’s worried Bryce is going to go hungry.

He does, however, make Bryce clean the pasta up, because if he didn’t he’s pretty sure Bryce would literally not even notice it was there. He has to do it again himself after Bryce does a half-assed job and then puts his nose right in his phone. Thank fuck it wasn’t a tomato based sauce or their carpet would be toast. Why do they even have a carpet? They’re clearly not responsible enough for one.

Seriously, carpet should have disqualified the place.

“Uh, J?” Bryce says. “You might want to check twitter?”

“Signing?” Jared asks on his way back from the kitchen. It’s getting around that time where some of the stragglers realise a contract-less season is imminent and take whatever offers are still available. That or teams realise they’re missing a key piece of the picture and start looking into what’s available and affordable. “Trade?”

“Um,” Bryce says, his whole body a wince, which is — concerning. “Just look?”

No fucking way Bryce is telling him, you can’t make him.

“Did they trade Gabe?” Jared asks.

They can’t trade Gabe. Gabe’s franchise, one of only two players from that Cup season still on the Canucks. He’s a fan favourite, and a sizeable contingent of their younger fans don’t remember a team without him. It’s pretty much an open secret he wants to spend his entire career in Vancouver, and that’s mutual. Also Stephen would fight management. Possibly literally.

Also Jared would be sad, so clearly it’s not allowed.

It has to be someone on the team who means more to Jared than they do to Bryce, considering it’s something Bryce thinks Jared needs to see for himself, which leaves Gabe and —

Literally it’s just Gabe.

Also Stephen, but Jared’s pretty sure Brian can’t trade him.

“Nobody’s traded!” Bryce says. “Just. You need to see it? Instead of me telling you about it?”

Not for a million dollars will Bryce tell him.

If people on the internet are talking about how hot they think Jared’s dad is again, he swears to god —

One of my favourite subplots that doesn’t make the main narrative — Don the DILF.

“Erin’s trending again,” Bryce says.

Jared’s sister trending on twitter is really not something that Jared expected to happen twice. Like, even in a big Canadian market, that’s getting slightly absurd for a the sister of a middle-six forward.

Imagine how she feels. (She again thinks it’s funny)

Bryce gently kicks him in the shin. “You might want to look it up.”

“No thanks,” Jared says.

Bryce kicks him again. “Seriously, though.”

“If I do will you stop kicking me?” Jared asks.

“Yeah,” Bryce says.

Please look this up out of your own volition so you won’t shoot Bryce Marcus, Messenger.

“J,” Bryce says. “He’s clearly not going to pick up.”

Jared hits ‘end’ and then ‘call’ for the fourth time.

Surely he will pick up the fourth time you call to yell at him.

“Maybe just leave a message?” Bryce suggests weakly.

“Are you fucking my sister?” Jared asks when the operator’s finished telling him the number he has dialled is currently unavailable, because Julius couldn’t even be bothered to set his voicemail message after literal years in Canada. “And pick up your fucking phone, Halla, I swear to god.”

Bryce regrets his suggestion.

“What,” he says.

“He’s probably not going to want to call you back?” Bryce says. “If you sound like that?”

“Nobody cares what Julius wants!” Jared says.

“Um,” Bryce says. “Are you — okay?”

Bryce increasingly realising Jared was completely blindsided by this and mentally rewinding to every time he thought Jared was just ignoring the relationship out of pettiness.

“You knew about this,” Jared says with dawning realisation.

Bryce looks shifty.

“You knew,” Jared says. “And you let me find out from twitter.”

“I didn’t know know,” Bryce says.

They have not been formally told, but nobody has been hiding this from them. See: several parts ago, when Erin was visiting a friend in Edmonton (nobody told Jared it was a university friend, as he stated, Jared just assumed it must be because he knows Erin didn’t keep in touch with anyone from high school or earlier. Neither Matheson sibling is a big friend maker)

“Jared,” Bryce says, then, from the other side of a slammed door, “Hey, that’s my room!”

Jared is sulking, so by all rights the sulking room now belongs to him.

He’d ask if the picture was misinterpreted, like it was with Bryce, but there really aren’t that many interpretations for a kiss. Sure, some cultures greet one another with kisses, but as far as Jared is aware, the Finns are not one of them, and neither are the Mathesons.

Ah yes, the famed Matheson culture. Signs of affection are ribbing, mockery, and snide.

And even if a kiss on the mouth was a Finnish greeting, it’d be one Julius would pointedly not do. Julius doesn’t like participating in things.

This is so accurate but hilarious from Jared because it’s one of the reasons they get along so well.

He’s not your liney anymore. Erin replies. P sure both your current lineys are already taken.

Also he’s literally on a rival team now? That’s like the anti-liney.

Ene-liney.

So you’re not denying it. Jared texts. He originally ended the text an exclamation mark, but that looked too dramatic. He’s fine. He’s chill.

So you’re not denying it!

Is this a thing? Jared writes, after deleting the two extra question marks that somehow popped up.

Is this a thing???

How long has this been a thing? Jared asks.

Officially? Like two weeks.

Before this there was some hanging out. But the euphemism-y kind of hanging out. And some texting while Julius was away. But Julius came back from Finland early, even before it was ‘officially’, which makes it a full-on Thing.

Unofficially? Jared asks.

Idk. You know how it is, Erin replies.

Jared does not know how it is. He can’t even begin to guess what she’s referring to, he has so little awareness of how it is. He met Bryce and that was it for him. Well. Give or take a few weeks and a minor grudge.

Oh we’re calling it a minor grudge now?

Wait no you don’t you were engaged at my age hahaha

Erin obviously knows Jared was engaged at nineteen, and gave him shit for it at the time (her ‘I can’t believe you’re going to be a child bride’ is one of my favourite lines in the entire series) but now that she’s nineteen herself?

His phone lights up with another text, which is just hahahahahaha and crying laughing emojis.

She’s dying what were they THINKING.

“Can I come in?” Bryce asks meekly.

“Fine,” Jared says, since it’s not like he’s talking to Erin anymore. Though he doesn’t know why Bryce would want to. This is the sulking room, and Bryce doesn’t seem sulky about this at all.

Only Big Sulky Babies allowed.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you?” Bryce says, perching on the bed beside Jared as Jared tries to forcibly wipe his brain clean. “I just — kind of thought it was something we both knew but we were like, pretending we didn’t know so you could ignore it forever.”

Look at Bryce supportively pretend something doesn’t exist because he fears for Jared’s sanity.

“Don and I are cool now,” Bryce says. “Sort of. Mostly. He hasn’t insulted me to my face in like – a while. Huh. That’s a good sign.”

Don did mean it about Bryce being a member of the family after he married Jared. You don’t insult family. Mock? Sure. Tease? Absolutely. But insult? Absolutely not.

“Why didn’t someone actually say ‘hey Jared, you do know this is a thing, right?’” Jared asks. His immediate family and Julius all know that Jared can be, well —

Someone should have made sure he was aware, is the point.

“I honestly think Erin just wanted to see how long it’d take you to figure it out if no one actually said ‘hey Jared, Erin and Julius are dating’,” Bryce says. “And apparently the answer was a picture on twitter?”

Everyone assumed Jared already knew and was pointedly ignoring it. Except Erin. She knew that Jared would yell at her or Julius when he knew, and therefore he was still in the dark.

Bryce looks shifty again. “Ash told me that Erin said that?”

Which means Ash knows, obviously. And that Ash and Bryce have discussed this. So Chaz must know. And Maia. Not that babies know things, just —

Don’t worry, Jared, I promise Maia didn’t know before you.

Fucking Oilers fans found out about this before Jared did. Flames fans did.

He doesn’t know why, but the fact Flames fans knew this before Jared did makes this so much worse than if it was just Oilers fans.

This is simultaneously a weird thing to get stuck on, yet also totally understandable. Oilers fans are Julius fans. Flames fans are Julius haters. But also may remember Erin from Bryce drama. Also fuck Flames fans, all Jared’s homies hate Flames fans.

Jared’s phone buzzes from where he tossed it after the last emoji round. He bets it’s more hahahahas. Possibly some skulls. Erin likes to die laughing.

She can’t hahaha any longer, she’s already dead from laughing.

150. Affront

Jared thinks people are supposed to be afraid of death. He’s pretty sure that’s common, reasonable. When threatened with death, people should feel fear. But what is Julius Halla doing right now? He’s laughing. At Jared.

He basically lived with you, Jared, he knows just how little true bite there is in you.

“Stop laughing,” Jared hisses. “You traitor.”

“Who am I a traitor to,” Julius says. He sounds vaguely curious, like someone who’s been accused of something ludicrous, and is interested to see how you came to that conclusion. Which is rich, for a traitor.

But who is he a traitor TO, Jared?

“Me!” Jared says. “And friendship! And lineys! And — there’s a code!”

I do enjoy Jared continually using Julius being his liney as a reason when they have now been divisional rivals longer than they were ever linemates.

“You think it’s the definition of toxic masculinity,” Julius says. “And that it frequently treats women as objects and prizes to be won, and also acts like showing affection towards your friends is gay. And you’re gay, and you think showing affection is disgusting, so obviously there is no connection.”

He listens <3

“She’s like, ten!” Jared says. “She’s way too young for you.”

Julius is very quiet. “How much older than you is—“

There’s about a two and a half year age difference between Erin and Julius. Bryce and Jared’s is just shy of four years. As Julius well knows, the bastard.

“Eating my food and dating my sister,” Jared says. “Who is a child.”

“How old were you when you got engaged?” Julius asks.

Jared can only an inarticulate sound of rage in answer, because Julius knows exactly how old he was when he got engaged.

The answer is ‘exactly as old as Erin is now’. As Julius is well aware, the BASTARD. Also, a missing word, my bad.

“Wait,” Jared says, suddenly horrified. More horrified. “You’re not engaged, are you?”

“No!” Julius says, sounding equally horrified.

This question isn’t the reason Julius doesn’t want to get married, but it certainly did not help.

“How did this even happen,” Jared moans. “Wait. Don’t tell me. I don’t want to know anything. Why didn’t you tell me.”

This feels like a trick question.

“I wanted to wait to tell you in person,” Julius says. “Because I was concerned you’d be, well. You know.”

People keep telling Jared he knows things that he does not know.

“I don’t know,” he says.

“Hysterical,” Julius says.

“I am not hysterical!” Jared says.

This might be more believable if Jared hadn’t shrieked that last bit.

The fact Bryce bursts out laughing in the living room contradicts that statement, but Julius can’t hear him. And maybe it’s coincidental laughter. Maybe Bryce is watching something funny. Because Jared is not hysterical.

“Wait, Erin didn’t think I’d be hysterical?” Jared says.

Look, Jared may deny he’s hysterical, but also — why didn’t Erin think he’d be hysterical? Even if he isn’t. Because he is not. But also — really?

For all of Erin’s many…many…many faults, an inability to predict Jared’s behaviour is unfortunately not one of them. She used her predictive ability for blackmail purposes way too much when they were younger, always caught him in the act when he was breaking the few house rules he ever broke then threatened to snitch if Jared didn’t do shit for her. He made her so many grilled cheese sandwiches. To this day he associates grilled cheese with smug smiles and extortion.

Admission of hysteria. Also Jared makes an excellent grilled cheese sandwich. Worth surveillance for blackmail purposes for sure.

“But I was in Finland at the beginning of summer,” Julius says. “And then Bryce injured his shoulder, and you went to Vancouver, and there was no good time. And then twitter.”

Julius, if asked, would say they were a thing months earlier than Erin would. But they had not yet defined the relationship.

“She’s fine,” Julius says. “She thinks it’s funny.”

He sounds faintly scandalised. Which is understandable, because it’s not funny.

“Did you tell her it’s not funny,” Jared says.

“I did,” Julius says. “She says she gets to decide if it’s funny or not.”

“But it’s not funny,” Jared says.

“I know,” Julius says.

Counterpoint from Erin: it’s fucking hilarious, you’re both just boring.

“Don’t like —“ Jared says, then pauses, because there are a lot of different demands warring in him right now. “That’s my sister, Halla.”

“I know,” Julius says. “Would it help if I told you I have…strong…feelings—“

“Gross,” Jared says. “Stop talking.”

“Okay,” Julius says, sounding greatly relieved.

I love their friendship. Every time feelings are involved they both react like cats getting sprayed with water.

“No,” Jared says. “Obviously it is. Did you know that they were together?”

There’s a silence.

“Mom?” Jared says.

“…did you not?” his mom asks. “Jared!”

NOBODY was hiding this from Jared. Nobody.

“Erin’s spent more time in Edmonton than Calgary since her semester ended,” mom says.

“She has a friend there,” Jared says, then, “Oh.”

Yes.

There's only one direct reference to Erin and Julius’ relationship before Jared finds out in the series, because I had to ride a careful line there, as Jared hadn’t noticed anything, so his POV wouldn’t really reflect the information he wasn’t paying attention to.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jared demands. ‘Friend’ is not telling him. ‘Friend’ is a euphemism you use when the other person already knows.

“I thought you knew!” his mom says. “And were just immaturely pretending that as long as you didn’t acknowledge it then it wasn’t actually happening!”

Jared thinks it might be a concerning sign that the two people who know him best both assume he thinks that if he pretends something hard enough, it won’t happen.

Yes that might indicate something about you, Jared.

“Yes!” Jared says. “Why aren’t you mad about this? Your daughter’s dating a hockey player. A hockey player. And you’re letting her?”

“You’re a hockey player, Jared,” his mom says. “As is your husband. And literally all of your friends.”

This isn’t exactly Grace’s mom upon finding out she was dating Raf.

“That’s just people in general, sweetie,” his mom says. “And we know Julius is a nice young man.”

“He is not,” Jared says. Julius is many things, but he is not nice.

“You know what I mean by nice, Jared,” his mom says.

He’s not a nice boy, but he is a good one. Also he speaks Matheson quite fluently.

“You can’t just assume that I like him.”

“Jared,” his mom says. “You love that boy. You brought him home for Christmas.”

“Out of the kindness of my heart,” Jared says.

“You brought home someone you don’t like for Christmas out of the kindness of your heart,” his mom says. “And then you invited him to your wedding. As one of the handful of guests who wasn’t immediately related to you or Bryce. Out of the kindness of your heart.”

Jared, we all know there is not even close to that much kindness in your heart.

“Obviously you like him, or he wouldn’t be one of your best friends,” his mom says. “And since you’re choosy about who you’re friends with, that means a lot. You have extremely good taste in friends, when you actually bother to make them.”

Jared picks at the hem of his shorts.

Jared thinks it’s quite rude for his mom to use facts and reason against him when he is intent on being unreasonable.

“Gross, love,” Jared says.

“I won’t tell Erin you love her, I promise,” his mom says.

“Good,” Jared says. “Ew.”

How dare anyone say he loves his (demon) sister.

“Jared,” his mom says. “Are you making this all about you?”

“No,” Jared says.

“Jared,” his mom says.

“Well it’s a little bit about me, isn’t it!” Jared says. “He’s my friend. And liney.”

“Former liney,” his mom says. Everyone’s so fixated on that part. Liney status can last past being teammates. Look at Jared and Chaz: linemates for life. Even though Bryce subsequently stole Chaz a little, despite the fact they played on completely different lines on the Flames. Not that it’s stealing. Couples share.

Jared can share. Look at how good Jared is at sharing. He only holds Bryce befriending Chaz against him a little, years down the line. That’s sharing.

Eventually Julius is going to get exposed to Erin’s sparkling personality.

He’s had some exposure therapy, rooming with Jared.

Jared would mention that long-distance relationships are highly prone to failure, but he’s pretty sure mom would bring up how much of his relationship with Bryce involved long-distance, and Jared is frankly sick of people reminding him of his own extremely successful relationship, and not letting him be hypocritical.

What bullshit.

He hates arguing with his mom. It’s like arguing with himself, except worse, because at least when he argues with himself, he always technically wins.

The best kind of argument.

“You remind me so much of your dad right now,” mom says.

“Mom!” Jared says.

“A little Don in the making,” his mom says. “He’d be so proud.”

Jared tries to tell her to take it back, but all he can manage is an inarticulate sound of rage. Again.

The cruelest thing you could say to him.

“I got Thai from that place on Burrard you really like,” Bryce says, then, all in a rush, “Sorry for assuming you knew about Julius and Erin and were just pretending you didn’t instead of like, actually not knowing. If I knew you actually didn’t know I would have told you. Or made Erin tell you because it wouldn’t be my place to tell you or. Are you mad at me?”

Sala Thai, for anyone curious. Also, poor Bryce. He really did think Jared knew.

“Did you get me soup to shut me up?” Jared asks.

“I got you it because it’s your favourite?” Bryce says, looking both hurt and confused.

Poor, poor Bryce.

“—and doesn’t he realise what Erin’s like?” Jared says. “Because he is going to be unpleasantly surprised when he gets to know her a little better.”

“Uh,” Bryce says. “I think he’s had a pretty good preview of what Erin’s like?”

BRYCE, NO. I mean, you are 100% correct, but NO.

“We are nothing alike,” Jared says.

“Erin made the exact same face when I said that,” Bryce says. “Like. That’s almost creepy.”

“You’ve said this to her?” Jared says.

“Yeah, because you’re both—“ Bryce says, then, “Ow! She did that too!”

Why do Mathesons keep smacking Bryce’s arm when he tells them the truth?

“We’re nothing alike,” Jared mutters.

Bryce says nothing, but he’s got this look on his face like ‘I’m humouring you right now by not arguing, but you know and I know that you’re full of shit’.

“Stop — looking at me with that face,” Jared says.

Bryce huffs out a laugh. “Erin said—“

Jared can’t hear him.

“Jared,” Bryce says, muffled. “Jared, I know you can hear me.”

Jared cannot.

Erin wasn’t immature enough to put her hands over her ears though, that one’s all Jared.

“Take it back,” Jared says.

“No,” Bryce says. “I’m not pretending something isn’t true just because you don’t like it, that’s ridiculous.”

Jared picks up his noodles.

“I got you soup,” Bryce says sadly as Jared stomps right back to the sulking room, this time with dinner.

Poor, poor Bryce.

#liveblogging the end

[bigification]

The Distributor - Male TF Story

A muscular, but put together man walks into a gym. He walks right passed the front desk as if they didn't see him, though some backstory items required to explain what was about to take place.

Chronos, the god of time, had grown bored of the mundane world of humanity. He had sworn to not interfere, but he couldn't help but think of the possibilities of how interesting this world could be if humanity was given something to stir them up. He was too hesitant to start too extreme, but messing with a few humans couldn't hurt. That's when he thought of something he had been working on, distributor. An ability that allows him to distribute the size, age, and even personalities among a group of people, *theoretically*. Why not try a test run, after all, if things go that bad he can just turn back time.

All that led to this moment, a god walking into a gym. Chronos casually walked to the middle of the gym, "This should do, only people in the gym should be affected by this." He said to himself as he released his power. He froze time and approached the closed man to him, a powerlifter in the middle of a rep.

He stood there for a moment, wondering what would happen to this man. Would he become the new Hulk, getting all of the muscle from the other men here, or would he turn into an immobile blob of fat, or neither. The tension is the exact reason Chronos did this. He started time again, and the changes began almost immediately. His belly began to grow, only being restrained by his skin tight belt. The tension grew and grew until the belt snapped in a loud bang, something did not seem to phase him, or anyone else in the gym for that matter. Now free from its shackles, a round belly flooded out, pushing out his stretchy singlet. His pecs ballooned out, also pushing out his singlet until they formed a soft pair of moobs that rested on his belly. His body formed an S shape as his once perky ass became flabby as fat flooded into his cheeks. The sudden and drastic change to the man's center of gravity seemed to throw him off balance but he continued to hold up the extremely heavy weight. The rest of his body seemed to catch up with the weight gain as chubby cheeks and a double chin former under his bushy beard. The musculature on his arms and legs became hidden under a layer of pudge and his fingers grew a layer of padding, resembling stuffed sausages. The man dropped the weight and opened his eyes. Chronos waited in anticipation for the mans reaction, but there was none. The man rubbed his belly as if he'd always been that fat, before proceeding to do another rep.

Slightly confused, Chronos reversed time to the moment he released his power and moved on to the next man he could see. A young scrawny guy, probably in his early 20s, was near the weights. It was probably his first time here, he looked like he had no idea what he was doing. Chronos started time, eager to see what happened to him.

The guys transformation happening quickly and suddenly. First one of his noodles arms burst out with muscle, his bicep grew to the size of his head and his hand doubled in size as veins surfaced all over his arm. The other arm followed suit, making his proportion look ridiculous. His shoulder broadened, becoming larger than those of the powerlifter. His previously flat chest ballooned out with muscle, completely destroying the shirt he was wearing. His now exposed pecs created a shelf over the rest of his comparibly tiny body, as hairs covered his swollen chest. His torso then grew in proportion with his massive shoulders, destroying what little was left of his shirt. This revealed a small muscle guy that became covered in hair, just like his chest. The man's legs quickly matched his body as his thighs plumped up, ripping right through his shorts and underwear, leaving him completely naked. His thighs were left thick enough to always be touching, with a now massive dick hanging between them. His feet exploded out of his size 8 shoes, becoming a hulking size 18, needed for balancing his massive body. Chronos was too distracted to notice that the man had grown to 6"5 during his transformation. He also didn't notice the man's face, he really got the short end of the stick with his age as a white beard covered his wrinkling face. Although he still looked great for his age, he must've been in his 60s by now.

The man gave a deep satisfied grunt as a white the liquid ran down his legs. "It seems all the muscle and testosterone went to this guy." Chronos said as the man posed in front of a mirror.

Chronos eyed down the man for a while before reversing time again and moving on. He made his way to the change rooms, immediately spotting a solid muscle gut soaking in the showers.

Chronos seemed to walk over in a trance, approaching the man, oblivious to the god around him and oblivious to the effects his powers will have on his body. He unpaused time, letting his power take ahold of this hunky man. Suddenly the man seemed to bend over as his glorious gut began to shrink. All of the day on his body quickly disappeared, as a cut 6 pack appeared under the sea of fat. His man boobs quickly turned into a pair of juicy pecs, creating a shelf over his abs. Veins appeared over his massive arms as thick traps appeared on his broad shoulders.

His demeanor changed as the older weathered man de aged into his 30s. Growing a full head of hair and a mustache straight out of the 80s. The man stretched with new life, and new muscle as he exited the shower. Smiling as he remembered how hot he is.

"I'll be back for you." Chronos said with a wink before moving on. He walked back to the locker room, reversing time once again. He noticed the one other man in the room, a cute ginger. Probably keeping up physique in between rugby, Chronos thought to himself. He looked over the man's short red hair, pasty white skin, and thick brushing of matching body hair.

"Well you're cute." Chronos said as he unpaused time. "I wonder how you'll turn out." He said, hot expecting what was to come. The man quickly sprouted up in height, going from a moderate 5"10 to a monstrous 6"7, going from what looks like a rugby player to a basketball player. The small layer of fat the man had seemed to grow, at first giving him a small pot belly, then growing to a solid beer gut. His relatively small chest broadened, looking more fitting for his now massive stature. His pecs swelled into a thick pair of moobs, big enough that no shirt would be able to hide it. That wasn't the most alarming part, though, the man's pasty white skin began to darken, and darken, and darken. His light ginger hair darkened to a dark black color as it became extremely curly all over his gargantuan body. His facial features started to shift, his lips plumped up and his nose widened as the hair on his hard receded and his shirt beard quickly grew into a thick bushy one. Covering up his now chubbier cheeks, and double chin, though it didn't look out of place on his large body. The man's arms then blew up with both fat and muscle, growing puffy biceps and giant man hands. Chronos then looked down to see the man rip out of his already small looking gym shorts, revealing a thick 8 cock hanging between his massive thighs and two thick cheeks sticking out behind him. He then noticed his size 18 feet rip right through his shoes. The man then grabbed his now comparably tiny towel and covered his manhood.

"Looks like big guy over here hogged all the melanin. I didn't even know I could do that." Chronos said while analysing his latest test subject. "Goodluck getting out of here in any clothes that fit." As he grabbed the 400 pound behemoth of a man.

Moving on, Chronos wondered into what looked like an office, forgetting to rewind time. He walked into what he soon found out was the main office, with the owner of the gym sitting in an office chair.

"Damn that guys massive, I was kind of expecting a different kind of massive coming from a business man but I guess it makes sense for a gym owner." Chronos said under his breath as he went to see he went to see what the man had on his computer, being the snoop that he is. He is shocked to see a picture of a very fat man on this man's computer. And that's when it clicked, he forgot to rewind time and the picture was of him before the transformation.

He rewinded time to see the ripped gym rat looking man turn into an obese dad with a giant ball belly. The exact man in the photos. "Well that explains a lot." Chronos says as he leaves the office, but finds himself walking right into someone. He takes a step back and sees a massive old man standing in front of him

"Damn, I guess that's where all of the fat went." He said standing at eye level with this man's gut. He rewinded time to see that the massive old man was once a young father, attempting to get rid of his dadbod. "What would your wife think of you how old man, hey I mean some girls are into the beach ball sized gut." Chronos said as he let out a meniacle laugh, watching the young man's life fade under hundreds of pounds of fat and grey hairs. The buttons on his already tight shirt popped off in dramatic fashion, as his giant gut spilled out. His moobs softened to the point that they now lay on his gut. The bottom half of his body is left naked after his shirt and underwear face under the immense pressure of his growing body. "I would hope that you at least got a big dick out of this exchange, but I can't see it anymore." Chronos continued to tease the poor man, despite the fact that he can't hear any of it. A thick grey beard covered the man's aging face, and his hairline receded way back on his head. The poor man just wanted to get rid of a small belly that fatherhood had given him, and now he left an obese naked old man. Though despite this, he still had a big smile plastered on his face.

[literary-illuminati]

Book Review 29 - Roadside Picnic by Arkady and Boris Strugatsky

I very theoretically read a few of the Strugatsky Brothers’ short stories for a Soviet Lit class in school years ago, but this is actually the first one of their books I can say I actually read and, like, meaningfully paid attention to. I was likewise vaguely aware that this was a very influential book, but only in a kind of fuzzy ‘the STALKER games are based on it, right?’ sort of way.

All to say, I went in basically blind and was actually pretty pleasantly surprised. Both by the quality of the book and by the realization of how much more influential it has been than I had previously realized. The afterwards by one of the authors for the new edition with the tell-all rant about the publication process was also just fascinating in an entirely different way.

The story takes place in a world where at a certain point aliens made contact with earth – not with any sort of communication or even physical presence, but through some sort of process that left zones around the world warped and strange, full of physics-defying miracles and ten thousand different ways to die horribly or end up slowly mutated and wasting away. The story is set around a small town in probably-Canada that was one of the ground zeroes, and about Red, one of the freelance ‘stalkers’ who make a fortune evading the government quarantine and securing some of those physics-defying-miracles to sell to the highest bidder before the official scientists can slowly make their way to them.

Red does not have what you would call a happy life.

The story’s split into three sections, with significant time jumps between each one. Which I did rather like the effect of, seeing how the town changes from a half-abandoned ruin everyone thinks is a month away from demolition to a scientific boomtown and the long-term effects of exposure become more and more well known but don’t stop the rush to exploit the potential riches of the alien detritus one bit. It also allows for a better look at Red’s slow downward slide in both material circumstance and morality.

Red himself is interesting? He’s a very rough, brutish sort of man, the kind who jumps to threats of violence pretty easily when it comes to disputes where he thinks he’s in the right, who doesn’t have the temperament to hold down any sort of steady, boring job, and knows it, and who has a little bit of a complex about all those things. He tries to look out for his friends and comrades, and provide for his family, and that’s about the highest morality he aspires to. Hardly the most original archetype, but it’s very well-realized. No matter how viscerally unlikable he gets at points when you’re spending so long in the close confines of his head.

Speaking of complexes and guilt – one of his overriding motivations for the back 2/3 of the book is trying to provide for and cure his daughter who, almost certainly due to the weird alien radiation he’s saturated with, was born incredibly mutated (in a ‘has fur and is incapable of human speech’ sort of way). Which, again, kind of blunt instrument characterization but the book did do an excellent job getting across the constant low-level soul eating guilt and resentment that basically soaked through him about her and how that motivates just about every major choice he makes in the final act of the story.

And since I’m talking about characterization – look, I get that most of this is just the close POV to a guy whose a complete boor, but my god did the portrayal of women in this just make me roll my eyes. And I like to think I’ve usually got fairly thick skin for this sort of thing – but hard to ignore the fact that the literal only two women with recurring roles and more than a handful of lines are a) the loving, long-suffering but supportive wife who we basically only ever see in domestic scenes and b) the dissolute hot-but-dumb slutty daughter of the stalker equivalent of the local oligarch, y’know? And Red’s internal monologue and how they’re described did not exactly obscure the issue.

Tone-wise – I mean, look, this book is really not helping the stereotype about Russian novels. Which is not at all a problem for me personally, but there is as far as I can tell exactly one uncomplicated heroic devotee of truth and the common good. He dies at the end of part one, and the guilt over it is another load-bearing chunk of Red’s various complexes. It is overwhelmingly a book of flawed, broken, small-minded and selfish people, most of whom aren’t too found of each other. The very ending, with the wish for a better world quite literally hidden away behind a barrier that requires a human sacrifice to traverse, kind of emphasizes that.

The long timeskips and fairly compressed narration means that there’s only really a vague sketch of the wider world – of the corporations and conspiracies who buy what the stalkers sell, of the miracles that exploiting them has allowed, and of how things have improved and/or gone to shit generally – but it’s a really well done sketch. Then again, the ability to have the protagonist be a bit player in wider structures and to gesture at outside agencies with their own schemes that just don’t matter to the plot seems to have been a much more common skill among sci fi writers a couple generations ago. Still, the sort of retrofutristic noir world, powered by alien wonders that some technicians can use but absolutely no one can understand, is well done and appealing.

Speaking of – so this really is a cosmic horror story, and honestly a better one than most modern inheritors of Lovecraft. The universe is wondrous and deadly and strange, it will kill you or mutate you beyond recognition or make you richer than you’ve ever dreamed, but most of all it does not care. Everything from the title on down is used to reinforce that, and the trouble humanity has coming to terms with the idea that to the aliens who have so profoundly changed civilization, we’re literally irrelevant. The descriptions of the environment and the precautions taken to navigate it are – well, I don’t know if they’re just the oldest example of a preexisting body of tropes or the book actually came up with them, but if it’s the latter then I suddenly understand a lot of what influenced some of my favourite works of sci fi horror.

Not part of the story per se, but the copy my library had included both a forward by Le Guin (mostly a reprint of the review she wrote when it was first translated to English in the...70s, I think?) and an author afterwards written in the 2000s about the book’s publication history. Which were both just absolutely fascinating.

#book review #sff #classic sf #roadside picnic #strugatsky brothers

[blumenflowergelb]

Love and Soulmates

• Well, this day is as good as any other to be a ten name days old, Yn thought. He was sitting on his bed, staring and wondering what he had done to get this. If he was honest with himself, it was theoretically a good thing. However reality was often disappointing. He was in his ten years old body but with his seventeen years old mind. Of course, his actual age does not seem a lot but he was through a lot of shit; from escaping to Bravos to fighting while the Second Long Night to seeing the First Dawn. A journey which he did not wish to relive again. But as always the gods did not care about what a mere human thought. And Yn was sure that the Gods were behind it; even if he didn’t know which one.

• He didn’t know how long he spent lamenting about his life but a knocking on his door brought him out of his slump. It was his sweet sister, Margeary Tyrell. She came inside and begann to talk and talk, her voice cutting through Yn thoughts. She endlessly chatted mostly with herself, however she was not bothered. It was expected from the simpleton. Yes, Yn was a quit strange. He was always different from his siblings, he truly did not like anybody touching him, loud voices and things that were not in order. His fascination with reptiles outright creeped people out; even his oldest brother Willas. But after he fell down a tree and hit his head, he became worse. Loud voices, spinning around or tunes that were monotone left him feel weird. This feeling became so bad that he saw spots and often passed out. Obviously this was something which left him cut out of the better part of society. He did not have friends and even his brothers did not engage with him. Although it was probably because he despised fighting and horses. Fighting made his head spin and horses stank and their fur made him itchy. Nevertheless Margaery adored him. When they were younger Yn allowed her to changed him into women clothes and play tea party. As they got older they did not do this anymore but Margaery still spent a lot of time with Yn.

• The never ending chat of Margaery was a thing that Yn inwardly enjoyed. This was something that he had missed. After years the hurt of losing his family became manageable but it never truly disappeared. And seeing her alive and well was something that left Yn a bitter taste on his tounge. He was happy but he wasn’t. It was hard to explain; Yn was overjoyed to have a chance to change everything but on the other side he had lost people he cared about. Sansa with her fiery hair and face made out of ice, Arya and Rickon, the true wolf out of the Starks, and obviously Jon. Yn loved him. His red eyes and white hair did not make him afraid; only intimated. Yn loved the days where they sat next to each other, listening to the people around them talk and sing and boast. The Free Folk has never lost their hearts even after losing so many. They were the strongest, no matter what the others thought. Even the Long Night did not make the people of Westeros nice to them. Most still sneered and spat on them. But in Yn minds they were wrong. The Free Folk was the first place where the people didn’t care if he talked until he did his share of hunting and doing his chores. And he always did. Especially because of Jon. After Yn came back hunting he always smiled at Yn like he brought him the stars. The memory which always made him slightly blush and smile, now made him frown and his heart ache. Jon didn’t know him. Nobody did.

• This did not escape Margaerys‘ sight. However she interpreted the long face of Yn as a fear of what was going to happen. She was excited, especially because her brother was seen as an outsider. This was his chance to find the one who would love and take care of him for ever. She hoped that the woman was going to be very beautiful and very very good-hearted. She crawled closer to Yn and slowly caressed his cheeks. Whenever she looked at him she felt an overwhelming love. She truly loved her brother.

• Before Yn could blink he was spirited to his grandmother. Usually she was sitting outside with his mother and ten other girls. They all talked and Olenna crooked out her offensive opinions. Well usually. Today however was not usual. She sat still, facing the beautiful garden of Highgarden but only her son was there. As Yn arrived he only heard snippets of ‘money’, ‘cost’ and weirdly ‘fated’. Once he was standing before them, his grandmother shut his father up with a quick wave and smiled at Yn. He was not stupid, he knew that there was something wrong. His grandmother never smiled at him; she tried to conserve with him as little as she could. He was held in a higher regard than his cousins but it was clear that he was her least favourite. Nonetheless now she was smiling at him. Not only she was looking kind but she even ordered his favourite food, lemon cakes. At this Sansa flashed in Yn‘s mind. They shared a love for lemon cakes and every time they fought over the last piece. But his grandmother’s speech left his memory quickly fade away and fear replaced it. She talked about his ten and one nameday next day and a fated mark, the Will of the Seven, soulmates, the cost of his wedding and which people are going to be invited. Mace tried to talk but whenever he opened his mouth Olenna hushed him. Once she was done she stood up, kissed Yn‘s cheek and ordered her twin guards to her. But before she left Yn and Mace alone she turned around and sent a glare towards her son, telling him that it was time. This left Yn dreading whatever was coming.

• The awkward silence was not broken until Mace sighed, took a lemon cake and begann to eat. After some humming he was done and leaned back on his chair, hand folded over his stomach. He begann to humm some more and sighed again. Once Yn heard the famous sentence ‘ You know son, there are things which a man must tell their son.’ he knew he was done. But before he could stand up his father took an other lemon cake, quickly ate that and looked deeply in Yn‘s eyes. The conservation which followed was one of the most mortifying thing Yn has ever experienced. Not even seeing hundreds of dead people could make him as sick as this. His father talked and talked about girls and boys and their differences down there. Than he went over talking about babies, which then led him to gush about how damm cute all his children were. This was followed by him talking about weddings and ceremonien and the most important: bedding. At this point Yn has given up. He was less than a day in this world and he was given The Talk. And he couldn’t even tell his father that he knew! Well not much about women but more about men. And well not men but about Jon. He was the first and last person Yn has ever been intimate with. This confirmed Yn that he was a indeed a pillow bitter but he could hardly tell his father about that.

• One thing that was new to Yn were the soulmates. He was sure that they didn’t have that. After thinking long about what it meant, Yn decided that he was not in the same world in which he spent majority of his life. And that soulmates were cool. Almost everybody had them, from the lowest to the highest person on earth. Only men and women without a mark could become a maester, septon/ septa or priest. The marks were seen as godly and everybody had to obey to them. Breaking apart a bond like that was seen as a grave mistake and death was the punishment for who tried to break it apart. The good thing about the soulmark was the way it appeared. There were marks that displayed a picture of all kinds, some were words; some sentences. They were marks that only appeared when the soulmates touched or looked at each other. Some lost the colour of their sights and could only seen any kind of colour once they looked in each other’s eyes. Some had compasses that showed where their other was located, some had quotes that matched, others had half their hair the colour of their soulmate’s. This manifested once they had their ten and one nameday. And Yn had his the next day.

• He didn’t care about his birthday. It passed in a frenzy and once he was sent to his chambers to wait and sleep, he was in ecstasy. He wanted to stay up the whole night but the maester told him that he had to sleep so that the Will of the Gods would fulfill in secret. No human was allowed to see the manifestation. Still Yn could barely sleep. He was trembling with fear and excitement. He wanted a soulmate but was affraid to get one. The idea of not having one left him feeling devastated so he didn’t think about it. He wanted Jon but was affraid of who he was now. He wanted and wanted but was affraid of so many things until he fell asleep. Dawn was barely coming when Yn felt a horrible burning on his left wrist. It left him gasping and crying but the manifestation was done. He got a compass pointing towards the North. It was golden but elegant and had a quote around the compass saying, ‘Different roads sometimes lead to the same castle’. And if you looked closely there were six direwolf, each different, running around and playfighting. It was perfect, Yn whispered to himself with tears escaping his eyes.

• The second he left his room he was jumped on by Margaery. She led him to the dinning room to break their fast while talking and talking. One minute she wanted to see the mark, the next minute she didn’t until they were with the whole family. They quickly arrived and his family was immediately on Yn. Once they saw the compass and closely inspected it, they all fell silent until Margaery laughed. Better said she cried while laughing and gave a big hug to Yn. While they hugged, Mace begann to plan a letter for Ned Stark. Even for him was clear that his son was meant for one of wolf blood.

• Olenna slowly fanned herself. It was hot for her age; she was not as young and agile as she once was. Undertaking such a big journey to Winterfell from Highgarden had affected her health negatively. Regardless, she was sure that she would crawl to Winterfell if it must be. She would never pass such an opportunity. And she was needed to talk to his grandsons future father-in-law. She was throughly thinking about all the possibilities that their journey could mean and what she had to do for the better of her house. Such an union between great houses was not seen since decades, especially between a fourth son and a bastard. Olenna was sure that it was the bastard that was the soulmate of her simpleton but kind hearted grandson. If not then why did Lady Catelyn not boast about one of her children being the soulmate of a Tyrell? She was after all a Tully, a very proud house, Olenna thought. The marriage could mean a lot for the Tyrells. A lot of good and bad. Olenna could only hope that if the bastard was the one then her little spies were not wrong about his father’s affection. Nobody needed an alliance with a bastard that held no power. She even entertained the idea of overthrowing the bastard brother‘s but quickly desposed of it. The Starks were too loyal. And the compass showed enough. Six direwolfs playing. This could only mean one thing. Her inner discussion was stoped once a loud knock was heard. She opened the side pannel and looked at one of her twin guards. She burrowed her eyebrows after she heard her foolish grandson riding out to meet his future beloved.

• Winterfell was as big as ever, Yn decided. It certainly looked better than the last time he saw it. It was huge and dark. But it was warm; and that is what mattered. He knew that the walls were warm with spring water and that the halls were always kept warm. He couldn’t wait to bath and bask in the memory of Winterfell and their occupants. And to see Jon again. As excited he was, he was as fearful. He was sure that Jon and him were meant to be together, but still. It was weird and new and they were so young. Jon was not older than ten and three, an age which Yn has never seen him. The worst thing was the people he traveled with. Lord Stark has invited hundred of people of the North and South and thousands came. The North wanted to see House Stark marry as a rich House as the Tyrells and the South wished to see House Stark and the North. This journey and wedding meant a lot of new alliances and weddings for the Realm. Even the King has journeyed to the North, but Yn was sure that he wasn’t there for the wedding. Not truly. It was Ned he was there for. Saddly Jon Arryn was not able to attend since he did not want to leave the rest of the Realm behind. What surprised Yn was that the Martells sent Oberyn Martell and his paramour as guests. It meant that they were planning something. Or they were simply affraid that the Reach allied with the North that can give them enough timber for a new war.

• Yn felt butterflies fighting in his stomach. He was so nervous that even Garlan commented on his suddenly disappearing horse riding abilities. To this Renly begann to joke around about riding what else and instead of shutting him down Garlan laughed with him. If Yn wasn’t as nervous he would have told them already off. Shortly before they arrived Willas slowed them down and talked about whom Yn had to greet firstly and what to do. Even the common courtesies flew over Yn’s head. He hoped that he would not make a fool of himself because if he did he would die. Maybe the rumour of him being a simpleton would minder the embarrassment but Yn did not want to make a fool out of Jon. While Yn was deep in his thoughts they arrived at the gates. Everybody sat straighter and rode inside the castle.

• Yn was sure that he was going to die. His compass was going crazy, the pointer spinning around, meaning that his soulmate was very close. And he was. The first thing he saw was Jon and the first thing he did was blushing. He felt his face light on fire and he was sure that everybody saw that. He was so embarrassed that he didn’t even look at the Starks. The worst was when he almost feel down his horse and if not for Loras he would have facepalmed the earth. He saw Loras trying to hide his chuckle but as always he couldn’t. This made Yn face more redder, his ears were so hot that he wanted to just jump in the next snow pile. And than he had to walk to the Starks and greet each of them. Ned Stark was an imposing man, and even bigger when you were only ten and two namedays old. His eyes hid a certain amusement and he kindly greeted Yn. Lady Catelyn was even kinder and hoped that their visit went well. The next person was Robb. He was cute but Yn understood why he was made King so early on. He looked like his ladymother but his eyes shone like his fathers. However the next person took Yn‘s breath away. He went redder than he thought to be possible and shyly held out his right hand. There was hope in Jon‘s beautiful dark grey eyes, but it was replaced with uncertainty once they touched each other hands. It was clear that he expected something more from the contact but was greatly disappointed. Yn moved on, after he saw this, and greated the girls and Bran with enthusiasm. Rickon was not there, but Yn knew that it must be because he was still a babe. After they were done with the greetings and talking, Lady Catelyn sent servant go show each if them a room, while excusing the lack of grand food. She told them that they expected them to arrive the next day and could only offer them a humble feast. Yn obviously had to make himself more foolish and told the lady that they came early because he was excited. At this even Willas had a hard time not laughing and while they walked away Yn had to hit him with his elbow to shut up. Once they were out of hearing range, his brothers recreated everything and Renly instead of helping, laughed with them. Yn was mortified enough to not even say goodbye to them and he just shut his door. His chamber was very big and beautifully filled with furs and other animal skins but Yn couldn’t appreciate it. Without a second he jumped on his bed and hid his face in a soft pillow. He was so flustered, especially seeing Jon‘s face fall, that he decided to never move again. Well until a servant brought him warm water. After he cleaned himself and spent an embarrassingly long time to decide what to wear, he went out to look for his brothers and Renly. Then they went to the feast. After Yn saw what was set in the table he thought that if this was not seen by Lady Catelyn as grand than what was grandiose? For being in the North, where every grain mattered, it was rich. He knew that for Renly and even Loras, as vain and proud they were, this would not seem to be anything big;but for Yn it was. He saw firsthandedly what people ate in the Winter.

• The food was good, the conservation was firstly awkward but the Garlan and Renly begann to talk and it was good again. Yn didn’t speak but nobody seemed to mind. Robb openly stared at him, even when Jon discreetly poked him, and Arya and Bran were so captured by Garlan telling them stories of his training that they barely ate. Sansa spent her time looking at Loras and Renly. Willas was entertaining Lady Catelyn and Lord Stark listened to everything and only said something if it was necessary. Jon sometimes looked up from his food only go meet Yn‘s eyes, who then averted his gaze and once even let his fork fall. Everybody was kind enough to not say anything but Yn only became more flustered. After they were done Yn felt Jon‘s gaze follow him and he thanked the Gods for not making him trip. They did not converse on the way to their rooms and Yn again thanked the Gods for not making his brothers make fun of him. After that he quickly readied himself for bed and after Willas came in to say good night he walked around his new room. They were bear and elk furs and Yn was sure that the skin belonged to a boar. The tapestries were beautifully done and Yn could not marvel enough. While he tried to remember from whom he the story of the tapestry knew, Jon came in his room. Yn turned around and greeted him only for Jon to not move. Yn did not move either, so they looked at each other, assessing everything about the other. Yn felt his knees getting weaker the longer he spent looking at Jon. He was truly beautiful and breathtaking. After some more silence Jon moved towards Yn and held his right hand out. Yn held his hand out too and once they touched Jon frowned, but did not ask. He left his hand fall in disappointment but before he could speak Yn touched his arm with his left. The burn was strong but once it ebbed away both felt an overwhelming sensation of love and adoration. Yn cradled their hand together and pulled Jon to himself. Jon slowly caressed Yn‘s face, as if he was something valuable and then leaned to his face. The small kiss they shared made Yn‘s heart fly higher than a bird and left him feeling like he could burst to flames. It was perfect and even after Jon left, Yn couldn’t help but replay their kiss again and again.

#game of thrones #asoiaf #jon snow #jon snow x reader #jon snow x male reader #male reader #x male reader #time travel #soulmates #ned stark #catelyn stark #sansa stark #arya stark #bran stark #robb stark #margaery tyrell #house tyrell #loras tyrell #renly baratheon #renly x loras

[saturdaynightghostclub]

Leander Mason, Prince of Chicago

Leander Mason is late. Which is not necessarily unusual, but for the fact that he’s late to his own engagement party. Which consequently has made you late to your own engagement party.

You wouldn’t normally mind, you swear. Honestly, this party wasn’t either of your ideas. It came about three months after Leander’s hurried late-night proposal, after which you’d both sworn to keep the news under wraps from your respective families, at least until you’d ironed out the important details of the wedding. The date, the venue, the catering—these were things you wanted to take care of yourselves, refusing to leave the door open for family interference of any kind. Naturally, though, an eagle-eyed uncle of Leander’s spotted your engagement ring in a photo his too-thoughtful nephew had sent alongside some holiday card or other, and then the entire Mason clan knew, which meant you had to tell your parents, and then the combined force of your two unhinged families became too much to bear and you buckled, both of you, allowing them this one concession in exchange for a (theoretically) peaceful wedding-planning process. So really, you wouldn’t normally mind if you missed a few minutes of this whole ridiculous affair, only it happens that Leander Mason is late because he procrastinated picking up his dry cleaning, neglecting to consider that the dry cleaner is closed on Sundays, and cannot possibly think of a better solution than driving all the hell over Chicago in search of a suit jacket that matches the trousers he plans to wear. He called you from a phone booth an hour ago to let you know. If you’d left an hour ago, you might have been a few minutes early. If you leave right this second, you’ll be twenty minutes late.

It’s not that you’re in any rush to fraternize with your estranged family. On the contrary, you’d rather never see them again. But being that they’ve invaded Chicago like cicadas and are unlikely to leave without torturing you for at least an hour or two, you think you’d better just get it over with.

The crash of a gangly frame through your front door sets you alert, and you’re met with Leander, haloed by the glow of the hallway light, panting from exertion. No suit jacket to be seen.

“Hi, darling,” he breathes, crossing the room to kiss you on the forehead, “I’m sorry, I thought I could make it, but then Saks was closed, and I hit every red light on the way here, and—my god, you’re beautiful.”

You can’t help the smile that crosses your face. You do look stunning, if you do say so yourself. “Next time you send yourself on a wild goose chase to avoid our families, take me with you,” you reply.

“Roger,” he says, smiling apologetically before he bolts into your bedroom. When he comes out, his hair is artfully tousled and his dress shirt is pressed within an inch of its life. “Ready?” He asks, taking your face in his hands and examining it as if for signs of regret or apprehension. Both of which you feel in spades, for the record.

“Ready,” you confirm in spite of yourself, unable to keep the nerves from your voice. Leander kisses you hard.

“No matter what happens tonight,” he murmurs, eyes locked on yours, “we’ve got each other’s backs, deal? You are my priority, Professor.”

“Deal,” you nod. And then you’re in the car, and then you’re in a small hotel ballroom with, like, one million rich Midwesterners and twenty or so of your own confused family members, most of whom (yourself included) have never experienced an opulence of this magnitude.

Leander sticks close to you as you enter the party, long fingers stretched across the small of your back. Where you have complete tunnel vision, he’s scanning the crowd like a hunter in search of game. “Come here,” he mutters suddenly, pulling you gently but firmly toward him with a nasty look over his shoulder. You glance behind you to see which of his family members he’s shielding you from, only to lock eyes with your own father. Jesus, here we go.

You turn fully to face your father, ignoring Leander’s insistent tugging and efforts to pull you away. “Dad,” you say, keeping your voice impressively neutral.

“Hi, sweetheart!” Your father beams, moving as if to hug you. You take a reflexive step back, feeling Leander’s hands on your shoulders as you do. He knows the hell your family has put you through; hell, he’s probably angrier about it than you are at this point. Your father’s smile falters for a split second, and you instinctively fear the rage that will follow if he’s made to look foolish in public. “This the man who’s stolen you away from us?”

“This is Leander,” you say, refusing to indulge his comment which, though delivered with the cadence of a joke, is certainly intended to bite. Cool, calm, collected. Measured and calculated, even.

“How do you do,” comes Leander’s voice, deeper than usual, as he leans into your back to extend a steady hand. Your father shakes it evenly, Pan-Am smile firmly back in place. Before he can say anything though, Leander speaks again. “Love, we’ve got a lot of people to greet, yeah? Let’s do a lap, maybe catch up with Dad later?”

“What are you doing?” You hiss as Leander sweeps you away.

“Trust me, Professor,” he murmurs in response, face carefully neutral as he navigates the crowd, “I know men like him. He’s angry, right? He’s miserable, he’s mean?”

“Sure,” you say.

“Then let him be angry with me,” he says. You’ve reached the corner of the ballroom now, his fingers gently circling your wrist as he attempts to maintain a facade of casualty. “Let him think I’m keeping you from your family, or whatever he wants to tell himself. Better me than you.”

You’re formulating a response, trying to decide whether you want to start an argument or fall into his arms and sob, when a bony, manicured hand lands on Leander’s shoulder. He spins to face the woman trying to get his attention, who you recognize after a moment as his aunt Livia.

“You two are just adorable!” she exclaims in a frankly impressive misreading of the situation.

“Thank you,” Leander replies, exasperated once again. You can see the frustration rising in him, as it so often does when dealing with his family, and suddenly you’re a fish out of water. Actually, you’re a fish in the razor-sharp beak of an eagle, and the eagle is soaring over the city at warp speed, and you knew it would be intense, but you couldn’t have predicted how completely overwhelmed you’d be when it really came down to it. His family and yours. Clueless and cruel, two sides of a really, fantastically stupid coin.

Jesus, girl, you think, you raised yourself better than this. So you roll your shoulders back, inhale (cigarette smoke, whiskey, heat) and exhale (pure unadulterated rage), and enter survival mode. If Jerry Cantrell was born to wail on the guitar and Leander Mason was born to be a (beautiful, wonderful) thorn in your side, then you were born to navigate the psychic minefield of family dysfunction.

The next few hours pass–or maybe they don’t–in a haze of “Good to meet you” and “Yes, we’re very happy” and “Sure, I’ll call more.” You can feel Leander’s anxiety spiking, too preoccupied with your own to do anything about it. And then, like magic, you’re back in his car. His forehead is on the steering wheel, his entire body curled forward in an impressive display of defeat.

“Leander,” you say softly, laying a hand flat on his back. His response is a low, guttural groan that you think wouldn’t be entirely out of place in a medieval torture chamber. “Want to run away to Iceland?” you ask, only half-joking. The poor man has been needled within an inch of his life tonight, by his family and yours alike.

He barks out a surprised half-laugh, righting his posture to look at you. “Yeah,” he says. His voice is raw. “But we’re not going to, right?”

“I mean, I don’t see why not.”

“Alright, give me your elevator pitch.”

You grin in spite of yourself. “You, me, and a little apartment on a river. No family to speak of.”

“Well, we don’t exactly need to go all the way to Iceland to have that, do we?” He asks, lifting your hand to his lips from where it rests on the center console. You raise an eyebrow. “If it’s a river you want, we’ve got a perfectly good one right here in Chicago.”

“And our families?”

“Fuck ‘em,” he says, eyes steady on yours, “You and me, my love. We’re more family to each other than all the people in that ballroom combined.”

You lean into your seat, letting your head fall back. “Yeah,” you say softly.

Part of you always sort of wondered if you’d eventually regret cutting off your parents the way you did. But wouldn’t it have happened by now? It’s been almost a decade, and you’re just as angry with them as you were at eighteen. The only person in the world who’s managed to make you feel sane about the entire thing is sitting beside you in the driver’s seat, and if that makes you both assholes then fine, you’ll be assholes together. God, fuck ‘em. You’ve got your family. And you’re definitely fucking eloping.

#toady talkin #yeah sorry again y’all this was once again not what I intended to write #and believe it or not I cut like a whole page of exposition from this #hence the bizarro pacing #anyway enjoy love ya #btw you should listen to Leonard Cohen while you read this #iodine or lover lover lover or i’m your man

[astreetcarnamedkendall]

currently thinking about the shot parallels between the big church scene in the pilot and the loustat dance in the finale. during the church scene at the end of the pilot, we get a close up shot of lestat looking directly into the camera - essentially proposing to louis to be his companion for all of eternity and convincing him to become a vampire. this direct eye contact kind of swallows you whole; you can't focus on anything else. louis, on the other hand, gets the same treatment but at first is not exactly looking directly at the camera. he is the one telling the story, so we are going to get a more direct view of what he remembers seeing (lestat's face), but he then eventually makes direct eye contact with the camera - specifically when lestat says that he loves louis and louis is loved which is what he's been craving. when louis is convinced, we are convinced; when louis allows himself to feel all of these emotions he's been trying to suppress, we are allowed to feel them with him.

during the dance, we get a similar kind of close up shot of lestat looking directly into the camera. again, this direct eye contact swallows you whole; you can't focus on anything else. louis gets the same treatment again, but his eyes are looking less directly at the camera. we know louis remembers the mixed feelings he felt that night because he knew he and claudia were going to try and kill lestat, but louis was losing the thread of the current plot in that moment because "i was his, and he was mine" thus looking slightly off to the side. we again feel what louis feels when he feels it because of he's the one telling the story and immersing us into his world (as he wants us to see it because we love an unreliable narrator).

the pilot church scene is them officially coming together, and they both understand that in the moment; the finale dance scene is them unraveling "for good" (for now... we shall see how the other seasons play out), and they both understand that in the moment

don't even get me started on the setting differences too - the church scene occurring when they're technically alone but the eyes of God/religion are theoretically present; the dance scene occurring when they're surrounded by so many people but they feel like it's just them until claudia breaks their dancing apart. ugh delicious!

#so sorry for the length but this is what occupies my mind so much #and i need to get it down somewhere #the crew for this show are stupendous i love how they crafted the entire show #iwtv come home the kids miss you #loustat #louis du pointe du lac #lestat de lioncourt #interview with the vampire #iwtv

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Mellow

(Shapeshifter!au, but Ramon this time. He doesn't have trauma yet, he's just a sweetheart.)

He held his hand out for the notepad he was supposed to use to communicate with the islanders, and for a moment it looked like Cucurucho was going to give it to him and move on like they had with everyone else, but then they did a quick double-take.

They looked at him for a long moment in silence, and he could only shift awkwardly under their stare.

Despite how many federation workers he had met over his, admittedly rather short, life, he had never managed to get fully used to the way they looked. They were entirely featureless by design, it was one of the first things people give up when they come to work for the federation – their individuality. They weren’t people, they were workers, and their appearances reflected that. Their faces were blank white slates, their outfits were a painfully generic uniform, only a small ‘nametag’ (could it truly be called a nametag when they had no names?) to distinguish them from each other… it was unnatural.

Perhaps that was a little hypocritical to say, though, seeing as Ramon was… what he was.

At least he could shift and make himself look more normal, though. Which is what he had done. Now, he looked like any other kid. Slightly tan skin; a shock of slightly messy, dark brown hair; wide brown eyes; a handlebar mustache; a little bit of baby fat still sticking to his features to make sure he looked young.

You know, average kid things.

Cucurucho disagreed, apparently.

They slid a hand into their pocket and pulled out their communicator. Like everyone else who was either part of or created by the federation, Cucurucho couldn’t ‘speak’, not really. However, as a high-ranking worker, they had a slight exception in the form of a tiny speaker nestled in the bow tied around their neck. Now, they clicked on one of their preset voice lines:

“WHY?” said Cucurucho.

He reached for the notepad and marker and, after a few seconds, Cucurucho handed them over.

“what did i do”

Cucurucho looked at them blankly. Admittedly, they had no other options, but regardless. There was something particularly judgmental about this particular stare. Their shoulders heaved in a silent sigh and they shook their head to themself.

“I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE ISLAND.”

They moved as if to continue on. After all, the islanders would be finishing their orientation video soon and god knows they would need guidance…

He caught them by the hand.

Cucurucho stopped, their head turning to look at him once again.

“CURIOUS,” they said.

Hastily, before they could get impatient, he wrote down his question:

“do you think my parents will like me”

Cucurucho hesitated.

“YES,” they said, patting his head.

He smiled, his shoulders sagging in relief. If Cucurucho was confident enough to say ‘yes’ instead of ‘maybe’, his parents must be good people. He had been briefed on who they were, yes, given a couple of files that listed things such as their general personalities and histories, had been given pictures of them so he could mimic their appearances, but that was all theoretical. Cucurucho, though, had actually met and ‘talked to’ the islanders, and if they thought that his parents would like him, then surely they would know best, right?

He looked at Cucurucho for a few moments more, and then tugged on their hand, trying to drag them down. They glanced at their communicator, ensuring that the islanders were distracted – apparently, they were all messing with their new app, which allowed them to speak in their native languages and still be understood – so they had some free time. Regardless of this knowledge, they were still hesitant when they knelt in front of him.

After a few seconds’ thought, he picked up his marker again and lifted it towards their face.

They flinched back in surprise, almost falling over.

He huffed lightly. He waited for them to get over their surprise and come back, but they never did.

They didn’t have eyes to track, but from the slight, barely there movements of their head, he guessed that they were probably looking between the marker and himself, wary. He pouted.

“WHY.”

He pouted harder, making his eyes slightly wider just to make sure the puppy eyes could have their maximum effect. Maybe he should actually make them into literal puppy dog eyes?

No, Cucurucho didn’t seem the type to like dogs.

They probably liked cats. Or maybe something weirder, like birds.

They sighed again, snapping him out of his thoughts. Hesitantly, they leaned forward, toward the marker. They must have realized they could wash it off, anyway, so they might as well let him have his fun. He beamed and quickly scrawled a smiley face onto Cucurucho’s head to match his own bright expression.

“now youre less scary”

Cucurucho lifted a hand to touch their face, and maybe it was just the poorly-drawn smile that had been added there, but he thought they looked kind of happy. Touched, even.

They ruffled his hair.

“YES.”

“I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE ISLAND.”

Ramon hoped so, too.

#qsmp #qsmp fanfiction #qsmp ramon #qsmp ramón #qsmp cucurucho #done crossposting now #soz about being dramatic kings

[tokiro07]

Latest chapter make me have this theory on speed in UUverse

Aside from Andy and the gods and possibly the Master UMAs/Seal getting sent to Earth, no one in UU has managed to break into faster-than-light travel. Even Top running full-speed in Spring arc only crossed the world in a few minutes and ran 5 laps round the globe in maybe 1 second in the latest chapter, whereas light can travel 7.5 times around Earth in one sec. (Making Top’s speed around 67% light speed)

What if… rather than Top not wanting/is scared to go into lightspeed, he just can’t? My theory is that all those who can go faster than light I mentioned earlier has some sort of spiritual powers that bypass the limit.

From Nico’s spaceship trip visisting Andy to Top running to Victor lauching his arm from orbit down to Earth that one time, all of them are physical actions bounded by physical laws, hence are limited by one that is the speed of photon being the fastest possible speed.

Andy lauching fingers from the Sun to Earth in a matter of seconds and God sending Seal to the planet both have something to do with souls, with what I think has separate laws and doesn’t really obey the lightspeed hard cap.

Maybe I’m just reaching here but it’d be funny to see the Union making a soul spaceship flying faster than photon through space.

I wonder what Rule governs the speed of light; UMA Light? UMA Speed? UMA Stop?

Either way, the limitations of physical mass are definitely at least a property of one of the Rules, though there's a good chance it won't be a Rule we have to worry about fighting

As souls don't have physical mass, it's completely reasonable to assume that they can reach lightspeed, and by the very nature of Unstoppable, Top should be capable of at least approaching lightspeed under normal circumstances, as nothing can stop him. If that's where it caps and he would just keep moving at a constant near-lightspeed, then the addition of the ability to control his soul should theoretically be the extra boost that he needs

Andy once overcame Unmove by using his soul to puppet his body, so there's precedent to believe that the properties of souls allow them to be unbound by most normal logic and then apply those properties to physical objects. He pulled the same trick again when Time desynced his body and soul, eliminating the lag by removing the need for the body to send its own signals

Whether a ship could be moved the same way is hard to say, but I'm certainly not going to assume that there's a limitation that the Negators can't overcome

#undead unluck #fouryearsandananime #uu spoilers

[kisuminight]

With the DSMP Blade System AU, I'm more vibing than I am coming up with a coherent story. But if I did have to come up with a story that I wrote out, I'd probably end it on an emotional triumph instead of a one based in combat.

So the Egg gets beaten. In the process, c!Dream would find out that he is part of the shattered Aegis and that XD is looking to put his original Aegis Blade back together. He would also find out that c!Philza is an Aegis Blade.

So he'd turn over a copy of the code that he and c!Punz worked on, to make the Memory Patch something that goes out in a general Universal Patch. And Phil would mention that just one Aegis can't make changes to what is/will be in the Universal Patch (for security reasons) and that they'll need to contact another Aegis.

What Phil trying to say: "This is great, I'll look over it. We can't do it immediately but I'll reach out to my Goddess and we will see if we can get other gods and their Aegis on board."

What Dream hears: "This Plan is fucked unless you, personally, find another Aegis on this server."

And Dream doesn't know another Aegis. But he knows that he used to be one. And he knows from the Revival Book that Aegis!Dream was attempting to create the Universal Memory Patch himself. So, theoretically, if he lets DreamXD bring Aegis!Dream back, then their problems are solved.

Dream doesn't want to die. But he's picked up that he has several similarities with Aegis!Dream. It wouldn't be a real death, would it? No more a real death than any other Blade goes through, when they revert to their core crystal without the Memory Patch. One Blade to save every other Blade, and if he makes it a condition of giving himself over, Aegis!Dream would probably be much better at working out Phase 2 of The Plan than he and Punz ever could alone.

Normally Dream wouldn't bother to leave a note. But this is the last impact he is going to have and he can be assured that c!Techno will remember him. So he does. And Techno comes down the next day and finds a letter that isn't outright saying anything but basically reads like a suicide note and that's... a Problem.

So he rounds up the people he thinks can talk Dream out of this--the syndicate plus Punz and Sapnap, basically--and they go try and stop Dream. Who has almost a full day's head start. And there's only one place where DreamXD is absolutely going to show up--the End Portal. So now it's a manhunt, using their combined knowledge, plus Phil's ability to sense aether, plus Techno's passive to try and track him down.

In a sense, they fail. They almost catch him, but Dream is 15 minutes ahead of them when he activates the portal.

DreamXD is just chilling when Drista brings Dream to him. Dream offers him his whole goal. To let DreamXD take his core crystal, to fuse it with the other pieces he's collected to resurrect his Aegis Blade.

But DreamXD isn't sure that he wants that anymore. He's been speaking with c!George, making friends with George, bonding over how it felt to have a Blade that you loved and then lost. George, who was dreaming at that very moment, astral projecting himself into the End, this time, instead of DreamXD going to him. George who has watched this entire conversation, even though Dream can't see him, and will lose his Blade, again, if DreamXD regains his.

Drista is watching too. She's been acting as his Blade for over 100 years at this point. Drista, who brought Dream to DreamXD without saying a word, serious and still like she never is. Drista, with whom the emotional bleed of the Resonance is tomb-silent and resigned.

"No." DreamXD decides.

At this point, the manhunt team come crashing into the End, all "Dream you idiot, you're not allowed to sacrifice yourself again!" and "Alright XD, you wanna do this? Then we're gonna fight!" And it turns into a very chaotic mess as Niki and Ranboo attempt to retrieve Dream out of the line of fire, Techno, Sapnap, and Punz go all in on the fight-XD bit, and Phil sidles over to Drista to head that bit off.

Final resolution would be that they all sit down and get the situation explained. Phil mentions that he forwarded the code to the Blood God's Aegis, and she is willing to help. Dream gets cornered with the fact that people love him and care about him and they're a little mad about past lies but that's not enough to make them leave. DreamXD gets a chance to confront what he lost and start the process of healing, finally. He teleports them all home, to the Antarctic Anarchist Compound, and then wakes George up and teleports him and Purpled to the group.

And like, there's still stuff that they all need to talk about. Reconciliations need to occur. Relationships that need to be sorted out. George and Dream absolutely need to have a shouting match about what they mean to each other and not be allowed to run away from it until they've both said everything and they've both said the truth. Punz is also going to make them crack open the ugly truths of how Dream made Sapnap feel, but also how Sapnap made Dream feel.

Dream and Punz need to get sat down to explain what all they've been doing/working on. If you think that DTeam + Syndicate won't shut down the Plan Phase 2, you're wrong.

When c!Bad and c!Skeppy finish recovering from the Egg, I think Dream and Punz will work with them, Techno, and Philza, to see if they can make it so that Blades can have an independent existence/be Awake without their Drivers (like in YWKON's finale), and still have a Resonance if they want one.

Life keeps going, with it's ups and downs. But this would be a sweet, happy note to end on.

#DSMP Blade System AU #c!dream #dreamxd #c!dream and his stupid self-sacrificial streak which is not any better in this 'verse #just a bit different from canon

[polyhexian]

Unconscious Mystery Man On Our Couch Happy Funtimes

Camila's over here having an ethical conniption. She's a veterinarian, not a doctor! The kids were easy to take care of, mostly bruises and bad scratches, but this man is a fresh amputee and he needs a hospital! Is it ethically acceptable to allow this guy to suffer through an infection on her couch? Veterinarians don't have the same Do No Harm doctors do, but there are still ETHICS, and she's grappling over whether it's more or less ethical to take him to a hospital. Except a hospital would bring on instant scrutiny, and like, even if they ignore the pointy ears, they're going to ask where his arm is. How does she explain that she doesn't know where his arm is??? He's in pain, what're the ethics of stealing animal painkillers and other medications from her workplace? Also, worst case scenario, if this man DIES on her COUCH, WHAT is she going to do with the body??

And then you've got the kids, who are more concerned with the Mystery.

Gus: That man should be dead. Hunter and Luz: Yeah, Belos was pretty thorough about killing off his Golden Guards, so how Marty here survived is pretty-- Gus, still processing everything he saw in Belos's mind: No, no, you don't get it. Belos literally watched that man stab himself and bleed out. He should, on so many levels, be DEAD.

Jasper, in one of his…idk, can this be called lucid? moments

Jasper: Hunter. Hunter, do you know you have feelings? Hunter: What. Jasper: Feelings. I have feelings. You have feelings. Do you know you have feelings?? Hunter: Um…yes? Jasper: Oh, good. I hoped you would. *conks out again* Hunter: what the fuck what the fuck whattheFUCK--

UCJRJAJJDJAJD jasper just sitting straight up like DO YOU KNOW YOU HAVE FEELINGS and then conking right out ...nfudhejdjsnt that is so good. So good.

And God poor Camila... this is such a shit place to be in for her. He wouldn't have immediately been to fever blitzed to speak immediately when they got to her house and he obviously needs the most urgent medical care. She doesn't want all the kids seeing more of this gore than they have to so she like finds something for the to do that would theoretically be helpful like oh, go set up the couch or something so they're like. Distracted. Kept busy. And jasper would have 100% for sure in whatever brief conversation he had with her while he was still lucid- he would have said point blank that if taking him to a healer would put the kids at risk, if it would put them and put them in danger, do not take him to the hospital. He at first just says like he would rather he die than put the kids in danger and she's probably not interested in that at first but- but the second he says like one of those kids is mine, I would give my life for him. And I think she would understand.

I have the image of him like. He's limping in with the kids help, half unconscious, and Camila takes charge and she's careful with the kids but accommodating and welcoming to them- jasper knows who Luz is and he thinks she's great and so if this is Luz's mom who she's turning to for help and this is her mom who is being so kind and understanding.... and oh my god, is that a basilisk??? Daughter?? Basilisk daughter???

That's like... she's a human woman who's taken in a magical child that so many people would consider a scary tale monster. I imagine that as she's trying to close up the flesh over the wound he has one strong moment of lucidity where he grabs her arm and says "please... if I don't make it take care of my baby, he doesn't have anyone and he never has, please" and like. When a man who might be dying begs you please, please, if I die take care of my baby-" which is less of like a "adopt him" request but more of like please make sure no one steals him, please make sure he goes with someone safe, please look out for him until someone else can if you can't. Luckily for him if he died she would in fact take him. Luckily that doesn't happen this time, but it means that like. While he's out of it and the kids are trying to figure shit out she's lingering there with like.... I had that interaction, I saw that fear and desperation in his eyes that only a parent can understand, terror to leave your child alone and unsafe.... so she knows. Like she can feel a lot there. If the kids aren't sure if he was serious about the son thing, if he really thinks he's Hunter's dad-- she knows for sure that he is

[mdhwrites]

Not sure if you've talked about him already, but what's your opinion on Matt Tholomule as a character? I feel like he's one of the very few (if not the only) characters who wasn't reduced to a softie after redemption like Amity/Lilith/Hunter

So 1. Shockingly enough, I never have and I'll get into probably why in a moment. 2. I can't be certain in my analysis here as I have only seen clips of For the Future and I'm not going to dig for his parts for this blog so I haven't seen all that he becomes but I have an idea. That idea also says that... Yeah, you're not wrong actually. Arguably, Lilith is soft enough and treated enough like a joke in S1 that TECHNICALLY her personality is intact post redemption. However, even if you argue that, she still seems like a parody of who she used to be.

Which... is actually kind of true Matt too. Why it works better here is that rather than make fun of a character's trauma and disregard their background, Matt was always a bit of a joke and his final form is actually steeped in who he was. We were never supposed to take him that seriously which is... a mixed bag for him. I'm going to say a lot of nice things at least conceptually about where he ends up but I want to make something clear: I barely think of Matt normally. I will entirely forget he was in the show because he is extremely forgettable. The situation he's in and his plight are always far more interesting than "Kind of bad at being a jerk/bully" which is his primary personality for two of his three main appearances. He's just not got a strong enough personality for two seasons to leave much of an impression and for a supporting cast's supporting member, you need to make a bigger splash than he ever did to be remembered.

But then we get S3 where we get just that. The boy, from my understanding, turns himself into a god damn comic book character and its glorious. And... It actually makes sense. Matt always had an ego and a desire for attention but he was missing two things to get to the point he's at now. The first was a better morale compass so that he could be a good guy and that part we get to see. The other is a proper community and support around him so he wasn't always looking over his shoulder. I... don't know how much that part is true to For the Future but the clips I've seen imply that he's at least not being disregarded or constantly have to prove himself anymore. He's just another member of the resistance which is a HELL of a lot better than he's had before.

This leads to all that bubbling confidence coming out into a glorious mess that absolutely fits how some teens try to act 'mature' by acting confidant. By celebrating things like stubble and proclaiming to the mirror "I AM A MAN NOW!" Buuut it also seems like the show was kind enough to not make him purely the butt of jokes like this but actually allow him to show that he's a good guy nowadays. He still prioritizes things like Amity's safety and what not after all. Again, I don't know how accurately but what I've seen theoretically shows me that yeah, For the Future did do something right.

Hell, as a moment of positivity: In a vacuum, the main thing I truly don't approve of in For the Future conceptually is Kikimora. There is no reason to have her back, let alone not beat her there. But if this was a pair of episodes in a full 20 episode season, they could have potentially been a highlight of the season. There's a lot of good character stuff conceptually here and it's utilizing the fact that the side characters can be fun in TOH, even if many of them have been turned more into like the twins where they're pretty bland now that they're purely good as well. But... That's in a vacuum where this didn't end up being a filler episode in a three episode season where so many critical elements are just left hollow while we spend time with characters who haven't mattered for an entire season. *sigh*

Still, I'm happy for Matt fans that their character got such a good ending.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#the owl house criticism #toh critical #mattholomule

[weezly14]

Hey Weezly, wondered about your thoughts on EP 9 of TCR. Tough one to watch, at least for me anyway. Thanks!

Hi there. You may regret asking for my thoughts.

Let me preface this by saying that I came into this show wanting to like it. I think Tom Holland is a great actor, and the source material was interesting, and I was curious to see what they'd do with it - especially once it became clear they were going the "inspired by" route rather than an adaptation of the Billy Milligan book.

That being said, I think episode 9 is when we start seeing the plot really get going, and, as a result, see just how poorly constructed it is. Episode 9 laid bare all the flaws and issues I could ignore in previous episodes. I'm going to watch the last episode because I've invested all this time already, but I liked this show a lot more before I watched this episode.

Here's a brief bullet-pointed list of some of my issues with it:

i hate this courtroom drama angle. a) that's not how trial works and b) why the fuck are we having a trial in the first place. Is he not pleading guilty? The trial just makes it clear how convoluted and contrived the case is - a shooting that injured but did not kill - and I know we were given the heads up that the defense lawyer isn't a good trial lawyer 2 episodes ago or something, but god, I could've represented Danny better. And the prosecutor gave a great performance except I cannot imagine a judge allowing half the shit he did. Also, again, the defense lawyer? Didn't cross-examine Marlin? wtf

the racial and sexual politics of this show are all the fuck over the place, and I could sort of let it slide but nope, now I've gotta call it out. 1) the prosecutor has been so clearly and completely painted as The Bad Guy so she's an easy target for abuse from viewers because she's being mean to our protagonist, and the fact that she (and the judge, who I assume will give Danny a harsh sentence next week - because the jury decides the verdict but the judge decides the sentence) is black and Danny is white? Feels some kind of way. 2) Angelo on the stand? This is a drug dealer, why would he show up? Further on Angelo - in like a 10 second scene last week we saw that Jonny-Danny had apparently a sexual relationship with him which makes the trying to get a gun scene hit so different. There's so much to unpack here. And yet. 3) Jerome. So, like most of the actors on this show, he's given a great performance. He and Tom have had some great scenes. But a) the amount of emotional labor this black character has done for the white character he barely knows is vaguely upsetting, b) when we're first introduced to Jerome via Ariana it doesn't come across as Great Love (sure we can debate this but I digress) but as soon as he seeks out Danny in prison and on the stand we get that narrative of practically Soulmates, c) this show purports to take place in the 70s - not a great time to be gay! To say nothing of the extra layer of race. Stonewall was 1969, dudes. On the one hand, super glad we're not having to listen to slurs. On the other, how is seemingly everyone barely blinking at Danny having a female alter or at the very least, if they don't accept the idea of alters, cross-dressing and fucking dudes? The prosecutor tries to prove that Jerome and Danny/Ariana weren't a couple because they never interactied outside the club - I'm sorry, it's the 1970s. Again, there is so much to unpack here re: Jerome as both a black man and a gay man and! We are getting! Nothing!

I liked Rya well enough but this episode she really grated on me? Her monologues felt preachy and patronizing.

Candy. So, one of the things I've come back to over and over is - we know Marlin abused Danny, and now we're to believe that Candy, on some level, knew. We also know that she married Marlin and theoretically stayed with him for financial reasons. Financial abuse is real, I'm not discounting that. But aside from being a dick, we don't really see Candy and Marlin's relationship as terribly abusive. She's so deferential to him, and yet we never see why, what has her so scared of him. She has a job! Her child is out of the house! Her characterization has been nearly nonexistent and it's frustrating.

So after struggling with undiagnosed MPD/DID for his entire life, we're supposed to accept that Danny, who was given a diagnosis like three days ago, is suddenly able to control his alters? With no issue? The scene 2? 3? Episodes ago where he tells Rya there are voices and he needs help is completely undermined by how much of a nonissue his alters have been in the interim.

All press tour Tom has been saying this show is about asking for help, and Danny asked for help in that scene - which was a great scene, I felt so seen there - and then in episode 9 we get Rya saying how brave or whatever Danny is for asking for help. BUT! He didn't! He committed a crime and was sent to jail and ended up in these therapy/interrogation sessions and then eventually yes, asked for help. But he was not out there crying for help, asking to be saved. He had his alters! He was unaware that he wasn't okay!

It's so clear that this show doesn't know what it wants to be and doesn't know what its focus is. Is it Danny? Is it Rya? The first 4 episodes are their own fucking show, and 6-9 are their own show. 5 feels like its own thing, too.

Additionally, this show is set in the 1970s. Why? Because Billy Milligan. Except they took the teeth out of that story, completely sanitized it to the point that there are virtually no stakes, but kept the set dressing. But that's literally all it is at this point. We get b-roll of 70s London, we have the costumes and cars, but aside from one shot of defense lawyer in army fatigues, we have no real sense of where we are in time. That is the only allusion to Vietnam. The prosecutor talked about incarceration like she's also read The New Jim Crow. Not a slur to be heard despite the fact that we are allegedly between Stonewall and AIDS. Rya talks about mental health like someone might in the present day. If they were already going to not make this about Billy Milligan, why the fuck did they keep it set in the 70s?

It is so frustrating because the actors are giving it their all. Tom? No notes. I was moved this episode, I've been moved all season. But I cannot get away from how poorly constructed this all is. This could've been so good. We should've spent more time digging into each alter. (What the fuck purpose did Mike serve? Ariana is the one "who can have sex" yet we also see Jonny engaging in sex?) What about the other dead alters in the barn? What about Adam. It has been hinted at all season that Marlin was not the first - the existence of Adam before Marlin would indicate that Danny had already experienced something that caused his psyche to split. we know nothing about dad. we still know nothing about Adam!!!!!!! Are we ever getting that resolution? Then what was the goddamn point? Why is there even a trial. Why have him commit a crime that's so toothless and that he's so obviously guilty of? Why structure this around a crime in the first place? Emmy Rossum has been severely underutilized, fuck, even Amanda Seyfried. Cannot believe they got Jason Isaacs to be in like. 17 minutes of this show. And once again, Tom Holland can have no lines and still be the most interesting character on screen. Can he go back to theatre, I'd love to see what he can do with a good script if this is what he can accomplish with a bad one.

I'm tired. This show had such potential, and it's tripping at the finish line. After taking four episodes to get started. Acting is great, cinematography has been good, but story? Writing? It's disappointing. I'm frustrated.

#weezly talks tcr #i'm gonna lose followers i can feel it #if you like this show then good for you! #not saying you can't!