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gaycrittercentral · 11 months

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I’d like to know where the Maxlings came from

Oh hell yeah I’d love to tell!! ok so I had the concept planned as a comic initially but it really got away from me and got too long for me to actually make, so what I’ve got is sort of a script-lookin thing that I would have used as framework for it. I hope that’s an ok format?? I considered trying to write it into more of a prose/fic format but honestly I like it best like this. Ok enough rambling I hope it’s funny to y’all lmao (also it got. Um. Very long)

First scene is in the middle of a beautiful glade deep in the woods, where Sam and Max are dancing in a crowd of magical-looking fairies, grinning at each other. It’s late and there are fairy lights (teehee) illuminating the area, tables of food and drink scattered around the outskirts of the crowd.

S: wow, quite the day we’ve had, eh little pal?

M: you can say that again, Sam! I mean, how often do you get to save an ancient fairy commune by beating up their evil warlock oppressor?

S: and on top of that they throw this little shindig in our honor! I have to say, I never knew lutes could play such great club music.

M: and I’m living for these hors d’oeuvres! We simply must get the recipe.

Behind them, a pair of fairies in big leafy crowns talk quietly.

Fairy queen: these strangers are so delightfully mischievous.

Other fairy queen (they are lesbians): quite! Truly a pair of mortals after our own hearts. How should we reward them for defeating our fell foe?

FQ 1: hmm…I have an amusing idea. What’s better than two chaos-causing mortals?

FQ 2: ahhh, I see! A marvelous idea!

The queens approach Sam and Max, with several other smiling fairies clustered around.

FQ 2: well, my friends, it has been a true pleasure to have you! Before you depart, my queen and I have a gift for you as thanks for defeating the dreaded warlock Snivellion.

(M: tee hee)

FQ 1: here, please take these.

She hands Max a little package made of leaves and tied with twine.

FQ 1: these magical seeds will grow into a wonderful gift if you keep them warm and safe.

M: well, we don’t have the best record with houseplants…

S: but we’ll happily accept your gift anyway! I’m sure they’ll be fun for the few minutes they manage to survive in the harsh climate of our office.

M: if they live through the trip back in my pocket, that is.

FQ 2: oh, trust me, I’m sure they will be every bit as hardy as the two of you.

Max stuffs the leaf packet in his inventory and he and Sam take their leave, waving to the fairies as they go.

S: so long now! Have fun partying eternally!

M: you know, we never did get introduced—don’t suppose I could get your names?

FQ 1: hah, nice try. Fare thee well, mortals!

FQ 2: farewell!

As they go, we see a shot of Max’s inventory, with his gun and maybe a hammer or something to show that’s what it is. The leaf package sits quietly for a moment, before releasing a tiny sprout.

Several months later…

Sometime in the dead of night, they’re both sleeping until Max stirs and sits up with his ears all lopsided, looking kinda disgruntled and tired.

M: I’m gonna go take a dump

S, not quite asleep yet and regretting it: you don’t have to tell me every time. I actually think I’d rather if you didn’t.

M: but what if I fall in? I’d want you to know what I was doing! :D

S: *half-asleep grumbling*

Max wanders off to the bathroom to perch on the can and read a magazine.

M: oh, Martha, you get me. Mostly because we’ve both been to the slammer

Suddenly a baby wail echoes from the toilet (thank you, mammalian diving reflex) and Max immediately screams, flings his magazine to parts unknown and runs for the hills.

M: Sam!! SAM!!! The toilet screamed at me!!!! I think that ill-advised bathroom exorcism we did instead of cleaning the shower drain didn’t work, we must’ve summoned some kind of toilet ghost instead!!

S: what are you talking about, numbskull? You interrupted a perfectly good dream I was having about a discontinued ice cream bar :(

M: just come help me get rid of it! I can’t go with some spectral peeping Tom shrieking at me!

They get to the bathroom and Max hovers by the door as Sam inspects the toilet.

S: Max, you cotton-brained dolt, there’s no ghosts in—GREAT GALLOPING GEYSERS TAP DANCING ON SATURN’S FURTHEST MOON!

He immediately reaches in to save the weird little wet rat almost glaring accusingly at him from the bowl (it could glare a little better if its eyes were functional yet). Max cringes at him.

M: Jesus, Sam, I know we’re both nasty, but I thought we agreed to leave this level of grossness to me! Wait what the fuck is that thing.

S: well, if my outdated recollection of mammalian biology and your horrifying baby pictures is correct, then I’d say it kind of looks like a neonatal lagomorph. Did…did this come out of you?

M: oh please, I think I’d know if I had something like that stashed away somewhere in here. (Vaguely gestures to himself) Now could you get outta the way? If it was just some weird naked rat that crawled up the toilet to yell at me and not a ghost, then I’d like to finish my business in here.

Sam stares at the little rat-looking baby. It has teeth. Teeth like Max’s. He grabs a towel out of the bathroom closet instead and tosses it in the bathtub, then nabs Max by the scruff of his neck and deposits him on top of it.

S: why don’t you just wait down here for a minute while I get this little thing cleaned up?

M: Sam what the hell I don’t need to be housebroken!! Ugh fine but you’re cleaning the towel if—oh my god there’s another one.

S: SWEET SAINT OLGA OF KIEV SINGING OPERA FOR AN AUDIENCE OF PUPPETS WITH A TIN FOIL SUIT AND TIE AND A CREAMED CORN CROWN

Several escaped kits later…

Sam and Max lie together in bed with the kits on top of them, all wiggling around and squeaking faintly. Sam looks vaguely shaken by the experience, but Max just kinda looks like it’s totally normal.

M: haha I thought you guys were just weird little turds! Well, aren’t all children though, come to think of it

S: and you’re sure they came out of your inventory and not some hitherto unknown reproductive system of yours?

M: Sam, at this point I think I’d be able to tell if they’d been up my ass, don’t you?

S: well, sure, but also that’s not where—

M: and besides, my pocket snacks have been going missing all day and this totally explains it. Look, that one’s still got Cheeto dust all over her face!

Sam looks down at one of the girls, who is indeed very orange.

S: ooh. Let me just clean you up there, sweetheart.

He licks her clean gently. She squeaks in approval.

S: huh! What do you know, that really is Cheeto dust.

M: see, I told you so! I still have no idea how they could’ve gotten in there, though…I mean, they look brand new. And also a lot like us.

S: well, mostly like you.

M: nah, see, this one’s got little floppy ears! And lookit their tails, mine’s not long like that. Oh! And this one’s got your nose!! Oh, Sam, it’s so precious I could just squish her like an overripe tomato! …um, but I won’t, obviously.

S: personally, I find myself rather enamored with their tiny little toe beans. Just look at that! They’re so little…

They both giggle delightedly over the kits for a minute, before relaxing back into the pillows. It’s still the middle of the night and they’re both exhausted.

S: so…if we don’t know how they got there, and they don’t look like they could be anybody else’s…

M: 👀

S: I mean unless we want to take them to the vet to check for microchips or something…?

M: too late I’m already coming up with names and dreaming of all the bad words I’m gonna teach them

S: oh, good, so am I. I guess it doesn’t matter how they got there, then…but you really have to wonder…

Something like a half hour ago…

The kits are sitting in a little pile in the middle of Max’s inventory, the opened leaf package below them and Max’s gun leaning against the wall beside them (it’s bigger than they are). Lacey’s face is covered in Cheeto dust and there are a few remaining Cheeto crumbs scattered around them. They have a brief conversation of squeaks, translated into pictures.

Maisie: >:/ *exit sign, there isn’t an emoji for it but just draw one*❗️(she’s bored and she wants out)

Lacey and Crowbar: :o ???

Maisie starts crawling around determinedly until she comes across some kind of rift in reality, through which the toilet bowl is visible. But not to her, of course, because she can’t see just yet. She immediately plummets out of the rift with a tiny shriek, and her siblings react like :0 there’s silence for a second, before Crowbar squeaks and is translated to:

C: dare you to go after her

L: 👀

And that’s it!! Hdkhsshsg here’s hoping it’s at least a little amusing to y’all because it’s very funny to me for whatever reason hdjshsjhddhdjhfjd

Oh! And as a reward for sticking around here’s one of the other first drawings of them I ever did :’> they were very much inspired by @lillylunala’s drawings of Max as a baby if it isn’t obvious, which you should absolutely check out if you haven’t seen them bc my god she really nailed it heheheeee

#hhhhfhdhdgshgskjfhsgsjjdh little creachers….#I wanted to capture that early comics feeling of them being inexplicably wrapped up in a bizarrely supernatural case #but refusing to explain how they got the case or how they got where they are or how they know these people or anything lmao #y’know just like ‘well max here we are in the enchanted fairies’ woods! better go arrest that warlock’#and it’s like how the fuck did you know to come here. did the commissioner tell you to go beat up a warlock?? since when are fairies real #and absolutely none of that gets answered hdkdhdjdhs #also rip to Maisie falling headfirst into a toilet. second child of theirs to be pulled out of one at birth #sam and max #freelance husbands #the maxlings #asks #my art

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antiloreolympus · 3 years

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7 Anti LO Asks

1. Do you know what really gets my blood boiling about this comic? Persephone and Demeter's relationship.

In the myths, Demeter and Persephone loved each other more than anything. Their reunion is so important - it marked the coming of spring and growth. A whole cult was dedicated to this for crying out loud. Yes, the myths were far from perfect, but the Persephone and Demeter myth showed the strength of a loving mother-daughter relationship with Demeter searching endlessly to find her child that was ripped away and had her innocence forcibly taken.

Now, RS is not the only author to make Demeter this over-bearing mother type in order to put more positivity onto the Hades-Persephone relationship. However, RS takes this trend to a whole new level - to the point where I would even consider it misogyny.

How is it, she takes this beautiful mother-daughter relationship and makes it out to be an abusive and controlling one, and then takes the Hades-Persephone relationship from a forceful one to a loving, perfect relationship with no problems? How is it ok to ruin one relationship to elevate another?

I understand that many versions of the myth try to downplay Hades' actions, and even make it so Persephone actually falls in love with him and there is no rape. But it doesn't change that this relationship was problematic, and meant to represent the loss of innocence.

Then fans have the gall to claim this comic is feminist and then claim on top of that that Demeter and Persephone's relationship was the same in the myth? These fans clearly don't know the myths, and neither does RS.

Making Hades a good person is fine. Changing it up a bit to make Persephone's loss of innocence something else is also fine. But ruining Demeter and Persephone's relationship? Especially when Persephone has to spend half the year with her? So horrible.

2. im sorry, but rachel cant introduce KRONOS coming back and then dropping it for several episodes to focus on a stake-less trail and persephone not knowing what lingerie to seduce hades in. like thats too much of an earth shaking development and huge stake plot point to just ignore for months to focus instead on something as minor as hxp's relationship, which only points out a huge flaw: why is hxp's relationship so minor in this? isnt the whole point supposed to be about them?

3. I think LO completely dropped the ball over Hades’ characterization.

From the first ep I thought ok, this is good, we have some bones to see he’s not that lucky in love and is just tired and lonely, and while ignoring the creepy actions towards Persephone, I thought ok, Artemis hates him, Hestia hates, even Ares hates him, maybe once Persephone finally sees the underworld and probably gets to know him it’ll be a clever twist and they’ll be proven wrong. The underworld will turn out to be fair and just, the citizens will love Hades, he’ll be revealed to be a good leader and king and not like his brothers, it’ll be like everyone saying Hades of myth isn’t actually that bad, and it’ll help reinforce why this sweet and bubbly Persephone wants him, she sees the real him, not the mean rumors and assumptions, this is perfect.

And then it just didn’t happen. The exact opposite happened, actually.

We’re shown the LO underworld is cruel and unjust, where the poor dead are forced into slavery and Hades created a harsh class divide with him and him only on top, the citizens hate him, the underworld gods don’t trust him and openly seem ok if he’s taken out of power, he’s not a good leader and king and doesn��t even want the job yet keeps it for his own ego and grip of power m, and on top of it all he is just like his brothers, if not worse. He loves to get violent over any little slight against him, he hoards wealth and resources to enrich himself while his citizens starve and struggle to survive, he’s corrupt, he controls all the media and laws to bend to his will, sleeps with his brothers wife for centuries behind his back while claiming to be holier than thou, he has sex with his secretaries who are made dependent on him for any way to survive, and now he lusts after his barely legal intern who is also now dependent on him for her way to survive, and that’s only what I remember off the top of my head.

LO perfectly set up to prove Hades isn’t the devil or the false pop culture assumption that he’s evil and to show some actual facts from myth, and yet Rachel only ended up reinforcing exactly that and even making him even worse with her made up ideas, all while thinking having Persephone ignore or excuse it somehow makes it not bad or even a good thing. It’s honestly kind of impressive just how bad of writing that actually is.

4. Chapter 172 is not that interesting. It’s setup had me excited to see Hephaestus and Hera and learning more about echo, but it’s cut so short. Because again the story can’t leave HXP out for 2 seconds.

I can also see why Zeus is gonna go insane.

5. i agree w/ other anon. LO should have pulled a PJO or a BoZ and just made up OCs and have them interact with the gods than whatever Rachel thinks shes doing, which is lying she's being accurate and faithful while completely changing all of it, removing what is needed, and adding what isnt so that it lines up with no actual myth besides like, various 50 shades fanfic she read in 2015 and some popular tumblr text posts.

6 . the animation studio behind blood of zeus literally can only draw one face for the men and one face for the women and they were still able to make the gods all look distinct and hot while LO can't even bother to use more than 6 colors and can only have the women look as tiny as possible with the biggest boobs while the men are all just lego men.

7. ////FP SPOILERS////

Okay so like I stopped reading LO way back before season 1 ended, and a majority of my knowledge of the series comes from what I read here on your blog which is enough for me lol and I decided to read the latest 5 chapters just to see what's up (on zahard. I refuse to give the actual series any views)

And I just. Could not take the whole scene with Daphne running from Apollo seriously? The anatomy and art inconsistency was so distracting that i genuinely could not find it serious. Even when Thanatos discovers her hibernated body I couldn't take it seriously because of how she looked?

And when Hades had that call (??? Was it a call? Or his inner dialogue? I couldn't really tell ngl) with Zeus and said he's causing Persephone unnecessary distress, and that she didn't pose any threat. B!tch??? She killed a ton of mortals??? She has no control over her powers???? She's literally a fugitive for the aforementioned things??? She apparently woke Kronos up? (Idk if anyone knows about that, again my knowledge only spans to whatever I read here) Hello????

And I have a lot to say about the chapters starting the trial but I'll only mention one thing; Hades saying "I don't think blindly supporting my little brother would be doing him any favours (as a ruler)" had me cackling. This is coming from a guy blindly supporting a girl he's literally only known for a few weeks, who's like what, only recently turned 20? Sit tf down Hades you're not cool, you creepy ass overgrown smurf.

Overall I still hate this series lmao. Regarding art though I feel like I wouldn't be so miffed about the anatomy much if the character designs were consistent and the story was compelling. They literally change hairstyles and body types frame by frame, and it's distracting.

The timeline from what I read here is laughable. 4 years in publication with almost 200 chapters and you're telling me only like a month has passed canonically. That's wild and such poor writing.

And as someone who literally will sympathise with any lead character pretty quickly, the story makes me hate them. It makes me want to root against them. I also hate the fact this trash is somehow top ranked on webtoons when so many other stories are far better then it.

Anyway, many thanks to this blog for existing and allowing me to dump so much text here to vent out my hate for this series lmao. You the mvp fam, hope you're having a good day 🥂🥂🥂

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

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purplesurveys · 3 years

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1044

survey by a7xbabii

Do you use e-mail often? I use it for eight hours, five days a week for work, so yes.

Do you hear any animals right now? I’m in a Starbucks inside a mall situated in the middle of a busy highway. It would be very unlikely to hear any animals right now.

Are you in a well-lit room? Sure, I’d say this establishment has good lighting. There’s no light directly above me unlike the other seats, but it’s okay in this case as I don’t want other people seeing me take surveys.

Is your trashcan full? The main one we use at home just got full, so the last time I checked this morning my mom was airing it out.

What was the last crunchy thing you consumed? My chicken barbecue sandwich from last night.

Did you view anything disturbing today? Hmm, I guess so? I wanted to entirely redo one part of my embroidery piece since I wasn’t happy with how I did it, so I had to remove the threads and stuff. When they were all gone the template was filled with holes and it looked like one of those trypophobia photos. I’m not personally disturbed by that phenomenon, but I know a lot of people are.

Are there any holiday decorations in your house? Yeah, we’ve had our Christmas tree up since the beginning of November. We also usually put a wreath up our door but idk why my mom didn’t this year.

When was the last time you had a terrible headache? Last night, because I had not eaten all day.

Have you recently put lotion on your hands? No. I don’t like the feeling of lotion, so I don’t apply it on me a lot, if at all.

Are you hungry? Not so much, actually. I don’t feel too hungry today; I didn’t even finish my breakfast and that’s the only meal I’ve had so far today, and it’s already 4 PM.

Is it rainy where you're at right now? No, it’s quite fair. The sun’s not too strong anymore because of the time, but it’s still very much bright out.

Do you carry a purse? If so, describe what it looks like. I take a wallet with me. It’s pink, made of fake leather, has three main slots inside, and it also has some tiny bite marks on the outer edges from when Cooper was a lot younger.

Is your cell phone on vibrate? For certain notifications only, like texts and Viber.

Is your dishwasher full? We don’t use a dishwasher.

When is the last time you saw someone you like/love. Around a week and a half ago.

Do you like to wear gloves? No, I find them too itchy and I don’t need to wear them anyway.

Is there a body of water near where you live? There’s a creek that passes through my village near the clubhouse area, if that counts.

What are your thoughts on Avenged Sevenfold? No opinion. I never listened to them; though I am reminded of this one mutual I used to have on Tumblr/Twitter. She used to be a wrestling fan and was a part of our main circle, but she gradually shifted her main fandom to Avenged Sevenfold. By the time she cemented her new interest she then went on a huge unfollowing spree of wrestling fans on her feed and she apparently PM’d each person she intended to unfollow, including me. I remember her explaining that she was now in a different fandom and was gonna have to stop following me which I found...kinda extra to be honest lmao because nobody does that, but I appreciate the effort to approach each one of us, I guess.

Are you wearing anything pink right now? Nope, but my wallet is pink and so is my keyboard cover.

Do you like to swim in the ocean? I prefer beaches, but sure.

What is the creepiest bug you've ever saw? Cockroaches.

Do you currently have split ends? I don’t think so.

When is the last time you used the bathroom? Around five hours ago when I took a shower before heading out.

Do you chew on your lip? Almost never.

Are you afraid of needles? For the most part yeah, especially syringes. I’m not afraid of them when I do my embroidery, but that’s the only time I feel comfortable with a needle.

What is the last thing you lost? A pen, I think.

When is the last time you saw a bald person? Five hours ago, when I said bye to my dad.

What car were you last in? [continued from two days ago] My own. I was driving home from the mall.

Do you like Batman? I tried to get into Batman and the whole shebang of comic books when I was a teenager, but I just couldn’t.

Have you ever played tennis? Never have, actually. I’ve always wanted to try.

Can you see a star shape in the room you are in? Probably not in my bedroom.

What are you sitting on? A pillow I’ve placed on my work chair so that it’s more comfortable. My parents got me a basic chair initially meant just for my internship, so it’s not the comfiest of chairs haha. But now that I have a job, a more suitable work chair is probably one of things I’ll have to invest on.

What is the last warm thing you touched? My chest felt itchy just a few seconds ago, so I was able to feel my skin scratching it.

Do you use hand sanitizer? That’s kind of a necessity now, so...

Where do you want to go in life? [continued from...I don’t even remember anymore] I don’t know if I even plan to make it past 30 at this point. I can’t answer this right now.

Are you sweating? No, I’ve been in air-conditioned rooms all day and it feels so damn good.

When is the last time you had to scratch an itch? A few minutes ago when my neck itched.

Are you in any kind of club or group that is trying to save animals? No, but I very much support the cause.

Who is the last blonde you saw? At work today I saw someone who had her hair dyed blonde.

Where were you two hours after you got up, and what were you doing there? I needed to go to the office today because my team and I needed to pack some stuff to seed to certain media. It was the first time I got to visit the place and it was sooooooo homey and pretty :) I wish we can be allowed to work in the office soon; it would be best for my mental health at this point.

Do you wish for world peace? Um, of course.

Have you ever played fetch with a dog? We were able to teach Cooper how to pick up items that we throw but he’s still slowly learning that he actually has to give it back to us, haha.

What is the nearest object that is wood? The table I am typing on is made of wood.

Do you use Netflix? Yes, we have a family subscription.

Does your house have a fireplace? No, we don’t. And I can confidently tell you all other houses in this entire country, and probably the whole of Southeast Asia, don’t.

Do you wake yourself up in the morning, or does someone else? I wake myself up. On important days, I’ll put an alarm on.

What kind of hoodie did you last wear? It was a white hoodie with a UP seal on the left side.

Do you play games on your computer? No, my laptop isn’t equipped for games. I tried downloading Sims 4 when they made it free for a few weeks back in 2018, but my laptop’s fan started whirring like crazy and the battery got drained super fast. The entire period of me booting it up and then deleting it took like, a literal 15 minutes.

What is the last video game that you played? Mario Kart 8 on the Switch. I want to get myself Switch games as gifts, but I’m just so stingy towards myself hahaha.

Have you ever pet a stingray? I’m 50% would like to at least once and 50% I know of what it did to Steve Irwin, and I’m not messing with them.

If you were on vacation, would you ever go to Ireland? It’s not a big item on my bucket list, honestly. I’d love to go to Ireland, but it would probably be a part of a bigger itinerary, like if I decided to take a trip to that part of Europe.

Are you logged into Myspace right now? I haven’t been on there for more than a decade.

Did you have anything bad happen to you today? Yeah, but they’re stuff that happened at work that are a little hard to explain.

Have you ever been to New York? Nope. I’d love to take a trip there.

Do you use the term "lol" if you don't have anything to say? Not really. I use it in the end of my messages more so that I don’t sound mean.

Should you be sleeping right now instead of taking this survey? Hell no. It’s a Friday night so the last thing I want to be doing is sleeping.

Can you truly say you hate anyone? I don’t think so. I greatly dislike my brother, but I guess I don’t hate him. I find it too strong a word.

Have you ever disected a baby pig in a class at school? Not a piglet, no. We dissected an earthworm, a fish, and eventually a frog.

What brand of dish liquid do you use? A local brand you wouldn’t recognize.

When is the last time you ate a Hershey Kiss? It’s probably been more than a year. It’s not my favorite candy.

Do you ever feel unappreciated? Yes.

Do you currently have any blemishes on your face? No. My pimple finally went away, hallelujah.

Who is the last baby you held? My cousin who is now 13 years old. I’m too anxious to hold babies; I always feel like I’d drop them so I find myself declining even when I have the chance to hold one.

Are you a lover? I guess.

Do you use smileys often in text convos? Yes. Not a lot of people like them but it’s better to sound friendly and approachable than stoic.

Do you have the Google toolbar on your computer? Like...Chrome? I have the program, yeah. It’s my default browser as well.

Do you like Sunkist? I’ve never had it.

Would you ever consider being a cannibal? I mean...I guess only if I was in a life-and-death situation, like if a plane I was in crashed on an island and I was starting to get hungry. I certainly don’t fantasize about cannibalism on any regular day.

Did you forget something important in the past week? I made a few mistakes at work due to me forgetting things, yeah.

Do you like learning new things? Sure.

What color is your toothpaste? White.

Are the floors in your house creaky? Nopes. I don’t think our doors are creaky-level just yet as well.

Do you fear death? I hate the uncertainty of what happens while it’s taking place, and what happens after. But I’ve been wishing for it for a while as well. There’s a difference.

Is your mouth dry? Not right now, no.

Do yoou have any scars from an animal? Yeah I’ve got a few marks and scratches from Cooper. I never run out of them, really.

Did you have fun with this survey? It was okay.

Was it random enough? Sure.

#survey #surveys

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justpeachyshua · 6 years

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good luck

pairing: hoshi x reader rating/warnings: teen+ for language; no warnings au: college au?? word count: 4,045 summary: “Ever since my first date, I’ve had the absolute worst luck when it comes to relationships. Bad dates, lying, cheating - I’ve seen it all. So, I decided to give up dating completely. It’s just better that way. No hurting, no heartbreak. I’ve strictly stuck by this rule for years now. That is, until I ran into a particularly spunky dancer on campus.”

note: so uhhh, I should definitely point out that I haven’t posted in months and that this was supposed to be for hoshi’s bday but it’s.... definitely way past that. but it’s done ya know! I’d like to believe that the quality maybe makes up for how late it is. It’s worth noting that over the summer I was on kind of a hiatus since I was in japan for a month and, now that school’s going on, updates are probably gonna be even slower, at least for longer fics like these. that being said, I’m gonna try branching out and making shorter imagines, maybe even some bulleted ones? just so I can post more often without my content being actual shit lmao. anyways enjoy the fic <3

I've never been the type of person who was good at dating. In fact, I'm fairly confident that some force in this universe was entirely dead set on making sure that every single relationship I entered ended in disaster. It all started in 6th grade when a classmate of mine asked me to watch a movie with him. I was all done up, wearing an outfit I had bought only the day before, and yet halfway through the movie, I felt something come up my throat and before I knew it I was vomiting onto the floor in front of me due to the sheer amount of caffeine, sugar, and nerves running through me. In sophomore year, I got my first real boyfriend, but that relationship lasted about a week before he revealed that he asked me out as a dare and couldn't bring himself to break up with me until then. This pattern of misfortune only continued through high school with various failed dates and boyfriends who lied and cheated. At some point, I got sick of it and, after graduating, I vowed to give up on dating completely.

From then on, I avoided romance like the plague. If anyone seemed to like me or even asked me out, I would gently let them down. I made sure that close friendships were just friendships and that I never led anyone on. At least, I tried. You see, for the first time in my life, there was an exception to my rule. Towards the beginning of my freshman year of college, Kwon Soonyoung stepped, or rather crashed, into my life.

I was a few yards away from the entrance to the dorms and I was rushing inside to retrieve a textbook from a friend, when someone ran right into me, knocking me down. I fell against my bag with a thud and, looking up, I saw the small wheels of a... Razor scooter? The person riding the scooter – a young guy with floppy black hair – had fallen, too, and I could see that he had scraped his knee on the concrete.

"Are you okay?!" The guy crawled up to me, still on the ground. He looked me over, checking to see if I was injured with a comically concerned face.

"Yeah, I'm fine, don't worry about it," I assured him. "What about you, though? Is your knee okay?"

I pointed to his scraped knee which was already beginning to bleed. He looked down, noticing the wound and, to my surprise, laughed. "I'll be okay! It happens all the time when I'm practicing." Before I could ask him what he meant, he added, "Which reminds me!" He shoved a flyer into my hands. "You should come see the dance team's performance tonight!"

I turned the flyer over, revealing a hand-drawn night sky with a large star in the center, containing the information for the performance. It was endearing. "Did you do this?"

"Ah no, my friend Mingyu did, actually. He's an art major so we asked him to design the flyers for us. I'm just the leader of the team," he explained, a large grin ever present on his face.

"Oh." I folded the flyer and stuffed it into my bag. I stood up, offered my hand to the guy, and helped him up. "I'll see if I can go." My eyes landed on his scooter again. "Uh, what’s the scooter for?"

"It's a faster way to get around," he said matter-of-factly. "I'm pretty new with it, though, so I need to get better at riding it."

"Well, good luck with that. Try not to run into anyone else today," I said, turning to enter the dorm again.

"Oh wait!" He called out. "What's your name? I'll put you on the VIP list. For, you know, accidentally running into you."

"It's Y/N. What's yours?"

"Soonyoung! But when I'm performing, call me Hoshi!" His grin grew wider and spread to his eyes, which shut into half-moons. The brightness in his eyes was captivating and his happiness was infectious, so much so that I practically forgot about our little crash entirely.

"See you later then, Hoshi." I waved him goodbye and finally went inside the dorm as I planned.

After I finished my last class that night, I decided to attend the performance and, to my amazement, Soonyoung was spectacular. He had kept his word of putting me on the "VIP list," though I found out when I got there that I was the only one on the list and that there wasn't really a list to begin with, just a simple promise. Before the show began, someone from the team (who I presumed to be a long-time member) brought Soonyoung out on stage, after which he gave a small introduction and revealed that he choreographed the whole show. I seemed to be the only one in the audience that was shocked at this and I was only further impressed when I saw the choreography itself. As soon as the team stepped on stage together and began their first song, my eyes were locked on Soonyoung – Hoshi in this setting – who was front and center. His moves were simultaneously fluid and powerful and unlike any dancing I had seen before. I began to wonder if he was secretly a professional choreographer masked as a college student.

When the performance ended, I was the first to approach him and congratulate him on his job well done, going on and on about the quality of the show. He seemed ecstatic, his face lighting up ten times brighter than it was earlier in the day.

"So, you'll come to our next performance, right? It'll be a couple of months from now." He asked with the widest smile on his face.

I nodded. "Sure." I pulled my phone out of my bag. "Here, put your number in my phone and let me know about the next performance." He took my phone and quickly typed in his number before handing it back to me. I noticed he had put it in as "Kwon Hoshi ☆" and I couldn’t help but laugh.

"I'll make sure I remind you of everything we do, don't worry!" He beamed. "You know, I think we're going to be good friends."

"I think so too."

That was years ago and, in the time between then and now, we really had become great friends. He convinced me to become the manager of the dance team, though that just meant giving them song suggestions and feedback when they practiced and lounging around with them when they hung out outside of meetings. Through that, I managed to make a ton more friends than I was anticipating, including the other "founders" of the team, Minghao, Jun, and Chan. The five of us became extremely close and, before I knew it, we were drinking together, spilling secrets, and having movie nights every week. Soonyoung especially became my best friend with him often spending the night at my apartment off-campus and even exchanging clothes with me sometimes.

He was a grade ahead of me, so I had to watch him graduate a year before I did. Admittedly, a lot of tears were shed, but he came back the very next year to cheer for me as I crossed the stage with my degree. After that, we decided we might as well become roomies as we figured shit out and he officially moved into my tiny apartment, taking what used to be the guest room. We've been living together for about a year and a half now and, over the course of this time, I've come dangerously close to loving Kwon Soonyoung.

What used to be small, cute mannerisms when we were in college have become all too alluring now that it's just the two of us. Before, neither of us would really cook when he was over and instead just order chicken and pizza, but now that he lives here full-time, I've noticed how he talks to himself as he figures out online recipes. When he styles his hair every morning, he always asks how it looks and I always push a few stray hairs away before I tell him he looks cool. Often, he'll wake up and walk straight to the kitchen without his pants on because he took them off before sleeping and forgot to put them on again. I don't stare, of course, but I can't ignore it either. Of course, the other guys do come by and make it feel like the old days again, but I can never shake the image of him falling asleep on the coach after a long night of watching anime or him dancing around the living room as he brushes his teeth. Everything he does totes the line between goofy and charming and it has me falling for him harder than I’d like to be.

Which brings me to a very important day: Soonyoung's birthday. See, for as long as we've been friends, Soonyoung and I have always made each other's birthdays as stellar as possible. One year I took him to paint a giant mural with me; The next year he took me bungee jumping. Generally, we tried to one up what we did the year before or at least do something equally as spectacular This year, however, I did something different. For his last birthday I had taken him to a SHINee fansign and had already planned to take him to Japan the next year, but I ended up changing my mind. This year, I instead decided to go on a simple picnic with Soonyoung. This decision came partially from the lack of funds for plane tickets and partially from one desire: To finally tell Soonyoung my thoughts on dating. For as long as we’d been friends, I had never quite opened to him about my fear of dating and, even considering how endearing and comfortable he was, I had to set some sort of boundary to prevent misfortune. So, it was decided. I would have to make our relationship clear – just friends, no feelings. At least, I hoped.

When he woke up that morning (wearing his pajama pants for once), I was already awake and making breakfast for the both of us. He sniffed the air and instantly became more alert. "Pancakes? You're spoiling me." He rushed over to sit at the island counter. "So, what's on the agenda for today?"

I placed the last finished pancake onto a plate and carried it over to him, setting a bottle of syrup in front of him as well. "Well, I was thinking we could just have a chill day and maybe go on a picnic at the park nearby?"

He looked up at me, scanning my face for any sign that I was joking. When he saw that I was completely serious, he silently nodded. "Awesome! What time should we go?" I could tell he wanted to ask why we weren't going all out this year, but he probably sensed that it would've been an awkward thing to pry about. I didn't want to disappoint him, so I hoped that he would at least enjoy today's activities.

"Maybe around 1:00?" I checked my phone, seeing that it was only 10:28. "That gives us about two and a half hours before then."

"Sounds good, then." He smiled before digging into the pancakes in front of him. He let out a long and satisfied sigh. "God, these are so good." I only grinned as I watched him eat, slowly picking at a plate of my own.

Within a few minutes we were both finished, and I took his plate to put in the sink. He padded over to the couch and I soon joined him, plopping down in the crevice I'd made from sitting in that exact spot for over two years. "By the way, I'm going to need you to leave the house for at least an hour before we leave."

He whipped his head towards me. "Aha! So there is a catch!"

"What?"

"You're planning something special for me, aren't you? That's why you want me out of the house, right? So you can bring a whole bunch of people in. Or better yet! You're bringing a dog home!" He exclaimed.

"I’m- I’m sorry, Soonyoung. No, I just need the time to make the food for the picnic and to get some things together. It's a surprise so I don't want you to see it.”

He became visibly more disappointed, albeit by just a bit. "Oh. That's okay. I'm sure I'll love whatever we do." He gave me his usual toothy smile. "I could see about hanging out with Chan for a bit to give you time."

"Thanks. And let him know he left some socks here the last time he stopped by."

"You got it," he said, already messaging Chan and beginning to get ready. "I'll be out of your hair in a bit. Just let me know when you're done!"

Within a few minutes, he was out of the door and I was left to begin my plan. I had already gotten a few recipes from my mom on a terribly long phone call the night before and cooking it took about an hour on its own, so the rest of the time was spent gathering everything else such as fruit, chips, drinks, and of course the crucial basket and blanket. At that point, I still had about 40 minutes remaining, so I found myself scrolling on my phone and becoming increasingly worried as my thoughts roamed. What if the food spills in the basket and we don’t have anything to eat? What if he has a secret allergy he never told me about and he goes into anaphylactic shock because of something I made? What if he ends our friendship after I tell him how I feel? The whole point of my plan is so I can avoid ruining our friendship, but what if that’s exactly what happens? What if he has feelings for me?

My phone pinged with a new text, snapping me out of my thoughts.

Kwon Hoshi ☆: hey! you almost ready? I can start heading back anytime you want~

I was relieved to be pulled out of my mental spiral. Looking at his message, I smiled at the squiggly he so often used when texting. It was cute and somehow evoked the exact tone he spoke with in person. I wanted to be able to hear that for a while, especially after today.

Me: hey, yeah I’m all done. you can come back now. just meet me at the entrance to the park, ok?

Kwon Hoshi ☆: you got it!!

The walk to the park took only a couple of minutes and, once I arrived, I sat on the neartest bench and waited for Soonyoung to walk up any second. Twenty minutes passed by, then thirty, then fifty, and soon well over an hour had passed and I was still sat there. No messages. No Soonyoung. Plenty of people had passed by – families with small children, a few groups of teenagers looking to play some sports in the open fields, and couples walking along the path, hands intertwined. I tried not to watch.

Finally, once I was about ready to give up and just head home, I heard someone shout my name from a few yards away. It was Soonyoung, out of breath and jogging towards me.

“Soonyoung, are you okay? Where have you been?”

“I was,” Pant. “In the car with Chan,” Pant. “He was driving me back.” Pant. “And I-”

“Okay, you need to sit down and catch your breath, you’re breathing way too hard right now.”

He sat and took a moment to calm down. “There was a huge accident that happened right in front of us. Someone completely swerved out of their lane and crashed into another car. So, for a while, we were in shock. At that point, my phone was dead because my charger stopped working while I was at Chan’s. Anyways, traffic was so bad that we were there for like twenty minutes just waiting to go past this super busy intersection that was all clogged up. In the end, Chan said I should just get out of the car and walk to the park since he’d probably be there a while. The walk took me a while, but I’m here now.”

“Sooyoung that’s- that’s crazy. I’m really sorry that all happened.” I had to take a few seconds to comprehend all that he had recounted to me. There was a very visceral, very unnerving feeling within me at that moment. Something was telling me that this wasn’t going to go well.

“No, I’m sorry. I’m super late and you’ve probably been sitting here for so long after you went through all the trouble to make food and everything.” But then again, with Soonyoung’s radiating optimism, I’m sure I’ll be able to get over it.

“It’s all good.” I gave him a reassuring smile. “I’m just glad you’re here now. Now come on, we should find a good spot to sit.”

We walked, gazing at the various photo-esque locations and quickly finding their flaws: a cute spot under the shade of a tree (too many bugs), a spot with some breeze by the stream (uncomfortable rocks and uneven terrain), a spot on the stone in front of a water fountain (as cute as they were, too many screaming, jumping kids). Yet finally, as we approached the far end of the park, we found the quaintest, quietest, most peaceful spot in the grass. It was sunny and warm and surrounded by yards of bright flowers. We agreed to settle there and placed our blanket down, beginning to unpack our lunch.

I found my initial bad impression begin to fade as we calmly ate, going in and out of conversation and generally just enjoying the other’s presence. Despite the simplicity of the meal, Soonyoung continuously reminded me how much he loved it. I was pleased to hear his compliments even if I did deny them. Soon enough we were finished with the food and I was reading the newest novel I had bought, picking back up from where I left off. In the cool and comfortable atmosphere, it almost felt as though we were one of the many couples in the park that day, enjoying a nice day out in the sun together, in love. I could see how a random passerby could glance at us and think, “Ah, what a cute date.” After all, with Soonyoung’s head laying on my lap as I read out loud to him, he did sort of look like my boyfriend. The entire time my eyes were fixed to the page as I focused on following the story and adding voices to each character for entertainment’s sake, but I took a pause for once to look down at Soonyoung. He was looking directly at me, eyes peering into my own, and I suddenly felt very vulnerable under his gaze.

“Soonyoung, I have to tell you something.”

Plop. Right in the middle of Soonyoung’s forehead landed a drop of water. Plop plop plop. Quickly, the rain began to fall and spiraled into a thunderstorm within seconds. Soonyoung jumped up as I rushed to throw my book and all our containers into the basket and run for cover, using the picnic blanket to shield the both of us. The other parkgoers also hurried to find a spot to stay dry and, evidently, we were left with nowhere to go.

“Let’s try to catch a bus home!” Soonyoung suggested. I nodded, and we sprinted to the stop outside the park entrance, dodging the rain under a couple of trees along the way.

“You have got to be kidding me!” I shouted. Just outside the gates was a bus, empty and unmoving, with about ten bus drivers with varying degrees of intense protests written on picket signs.

“Shit, how could I forget? Bus drivers have been on strike all week, there’s no way we’re gonna convince them to bring us home.”

By now we had been out in the rain for at least four minutes and we were drenched despite our efforts to protect ourselves with the blanket. I should have known. Soonyoung being late in the first place was the first red flag, but I chose to ignore it. I chose to ignore it because I knew I was enjoying what we had, pretending we were a couple. It was so incredibly selfish. It was selfish the way I let myself get caught up in the moment. It was selfish the way I let my bad luck get in the way. It was selfish the way I ruined Soonyoung’s birthday by making it all about me.

I kept my head down in shame. While my body was freezing cold, my eyes began to burn with tears. I willed them to stay back but I couldn’t stop them, and so they fell and I heaved.

He turned to me and began to rub my back. “Hey, are you okay?”

I sobbed then. “I’m sorry, Soonyoung. I wanted to make your birthday nice, but I just ruined it.”

He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. “It’s okay. It’s not your fault. Don’t worry about it.”

“No, this was supposed to be your day. Today was supposed to be special. I was supposed to take you to Japan and instead we’re stuck here in the rain, freezing our asses off,” I choked out.

Looking up, I saw his brow furrow into an unreadable expression. “Maybe we don’t have to be.” He shrugged the blanket off his shoulder, wrapping it around my head, and gently grabbed my hand. In a spontaneous burst of energy not uncommon to Soonyoung, he took off in a run with me trailing behind. He dragged me to the nearest store awning and plucked an umbrella from the bin beside the door.

“Soonyoung, what are you doing?” I asked.

“Just follow my lead.”

With a flourish, he pushed the umbrella open, held it over his head, and sprang out onto the street with a splash. He motioned back to the bin, urging me to grab an umbrella for myself. I hesitantly pulled one out and opened it before joining Soonyoung on the street. He grabbed my hand once again and led me into a simple dance. As we moved about, we kicked up large splashes of rain on the street below us. We spun around, making large strides from side to side and twirling the handles of our umbrellas. Once we were both completely out of breath, we returned to the store awning.

I regulated my breathing before starting. “Now what was all that about?”

“I wanted to show you that this day hasn’t been completely ruined. Even if it’s pouring, we can still have a good time if we’re together.” He took my hand in his once more, this time clasping both of his hands around it. They were comfortably and unusually warm considering the current weather conditions. “I say we head home with these umbrellas and make some frozen pizza. What do you think?”

“That sounds pretty good.” I couldn’t help but smile. “But I still feel pretty shitty about today. I- I don’t exactly have the best luck with these kinds of things.”

The corner of his lips tugged into a sympathetic grin. “Don’t worry about it.” He gingerly pressed a kiss onto the top of my head. “This is the best birthday date I could ask for.”

And in that moment, I came to accept what I had with Kwon Soonyoung, my best friend, my roommate, and the object of my affection. After all these years of letting guys into my life and repeatedly getting knocked down, I found the one boy who could quell those worries. I found the one boy who could step up to the universe and tell it to fuck right off as he danced away in the middle of a thunderstorm. I found the one boy who I finally felt lucky to have.

#hello this took me like 4 months to finish #bc im an actual piece of shit haha #but yes i'll try to write shorter things to update more frequently #seventeen #svt #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #seventeen fic #svt fic #seventeen fanfic #svt fanfic #hoshi #kwon soonyoung #hoshi imagine #hoshi fanfic #hoshi fic #hoshi seventeen

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lightsandlostbells · 6 years

Text

Skam France 2.10 and 2.11 reaction

Skam France dropped two episodes last week, so I’m gonna put them together.

this is another angry recap so heads up if you’re not into those

Episode 10

Clip 1 - Mickael and Lisa are very loud

Right off the bat - worst birthday ever. Making it Manon’s birthday was a good way to adapt these scenes into a holiday setting, though.

Are they play-acting so Manon can hear, or is this supposed to be a conversation between them and they’re careless enough to be too loud?

Actually I think this is a real conversation, not a performance for Manon. I think Lisa is sincere and she’s genuinely forgotten Manon’s birthday. Also that she really thinks for a second they’ve got to celebrate the pope’s birthday.

Lisa saying she misses Manon is sweet. Pretty sure they’re not going to delve into this family relationship or anything but it’s nice especially considering Lisa seems quite cantankerous.

Lisa telling Mickael to open the door faster made me laugh for some reason. She doesn’t have time to prolong the drama.

This whole conversation is funny but poor Manon, she just wants to shut out the world.

Clip 2 - Mickael gets real

Manon’s actress continues to do a good job. She looks so tired and beaten down by everything.

Mickael and Lisa are both cute in their rendition of Happy Birthday! Lisa has so much more energy than Linn.

“We’re sorry to steal from your cupboards all the time and ruin your life like leeches from hell.” lmao I love Mickael.

I was apprehensive following the previous scene, because we got a funny conversation between Mickael and Lisa, but not the more serious and caring side of Mickael and the talk with Eskild that was in the original clip. I was worried because overall his character has felt less nurturing than Eskild and he hasn’t seemed to have as close of a bond with Manon - there were a few moments that were played more for humor than to indicate a strong relationship. It made me nervous that they were taking Mickael more in the direction of “gay comic relief” rather than showing his more substantial sides. So the fact they followed up the earlier conversation with Michael talking to Manon in a heavier way here was reassuring. We get to see his more caring side. He sympathizes with her and acknowledges how much he talks about his life but offers to listen as well. The actor is great and I hope they continue to give him the meatier material, especially in S3

I know he’s saying it because he’s worried, but telling a person with an eating disorder she has to eat entirety of her tray maybe isn’t the best advice? Though I doubt he knows about her ED.

Clip 3 - Charles shows up

I do think it makes it more random and less sense that she’d be like “go party with your friends, Charles” when it’s her own birthday. Or does he know that? He has to know that, didn’t he get her the cake? He’d probably see it on social media?

This is in my opinion the best Noorhelm scene of that relationship, and it almost was of Marles, too. Charles/William acts like a decent person, comes in semi-confrontational but gets his priorities straight when he sees that Manon/Noora is breaking down and panicking, and tries to calm her down and support her. The original scene of him lying down with Noora was genuinely touching and supportive.

They were on the right track and then they botched it. I have an anxiety disorder. I have had panic attacks. I know how scary they are. You don’t “help” someone with a panic attack by physically picking them and making them leave despite them crying at you they don’t want to go out. What the hell. Why would they add that?

I mean I feel like there’s some weird gender shit going on here, with Charles being the alpha male type and then Manon being the fragile woman and it’s OK for Charles to ignore what she’s saying because Charles Knows Best. Not to mention this is the show’s idea of a swoon-worthy moment. We gotta get the guy carrying the girl around like a little doll.

Lol, I even saw some weird justification of this moment along the lines of “Well, if she really didn’t want to go out, I’m sure he would have respected that.” She’s crying and telling him she doesn’t want to go out. What more does she have to do to get the message across? Does she have to physically fight him?

Clip 4 - Birthday cake

Well, the cake looks pretty, and at least they wrote in a new scene to acknowledge her birthday.

Also, don’t totally love that he took her phone away. I get it, he probably wants her to just chill, but in connection with everything else, it’s just another small way he’s jumping in and making decisions for her. I would not have been as annoyed if this wasn’t a pattern in their relationship or if this wasn’t immediately following a moment where Charles overrides Manon’s pleas on how to handle her own panic attack.

This scene of them on the rooftop felt like something out of a kdrama in terms of music and slow motion staring at each other. Or at least how I remember the kdramas I’ve seen.

I don’t get why he needed to take her to the rooftop other than the #aesthetic since he just carries her back to her room. I know it’s where their first date was, but she was freaking out and panicking when he tried to make her leave. I really can’t get over that! Whyyy did they need that moment?

Did Charles look at her phone? Sort of dilutes the impact of him not reading her Facebook messages.

He muted the volume on her computer at least.

Episode 11

Clip 1 - Charles writing

I guess Charles was up writing this article for a while since it’s like 5 in the morning.

Confession time: I’ve never really liked that William (and now Charles) wrote the article for her. I know it’s considered to be one of the better things he did for her but even when I was watching S2 for the first time, I was like 😕 “Can’t they give me something to like about him that I don’t have reservations about?” I don’t think this was a terrible horrible thing he did, and admittedly I am bringing personal feelings into this situation, but it’s just something that I would not be OK with if someone did it for me without telling me first. I would be really panicked and upset if someone did this to me even if they meant it to be a kindness. He wrote the article and submitted it without her consent. Her name is on it. That means she’ll be held accountable for whatever the article says. Consider that Manon and Charles have been disagreeing on tons of topics so far - in fact Charles’ ability to make Manon rethink her opinions is a point that has been explicitly made about their relationship. So when it comes to the article, how can you expect that Manon and Charles would agree on the same points? Someone can be well-intentioned and still say stuff that’s a bit clueless, or make a mistake, and then it’s Manon who would be responsible. This only works if you assume Charles was a great writer with the right opinions - it excuses the action based on the outcome, without considering if the action itself is appropriate. (Which, to be frank, is true of many actions in this season.)

I would’ve preferred if he’d written it and then shown it to her to get her approval before sending. (“But that would have ruined the surprise/she wouldn’t have agreed to send it” - uh, too bad? She should get a voice in this. I get that she’s dealing with serious anxiety, I know what that feels like. But lol, imagine the resulting anxiety if Charles had sent out the article and it had a bunch of errors or some questionable opinions in it and Manon was criticized for it.)

The best case scenario is that he just took her notes and compiled them into something cohesive, which was somewhat implied, but she didn’t have enough notes to make a long enough article without him injecting his own thoughts.

Clips 2 and 3 - Manon and her girls

Did Charles make her tea? Now that’s a nice gesture.

Charles is watching her sleep, just to bring in those true Edward Cullen vibes. Manon was right about this being Twilight!

Lmao, explain to me why she had to wear that tiny dress? That looks like something I’d have worn to a middle school dance when I still had braces. It’s not Norwegian Constitution Day where the girls are going to be dressed up. It’s Manon’s birthday - she can dress however the hell she wants. She doesn’t have to dress up, she could wear her normal clothes. She could roll over to the party in sweats and a nacho cheese-stained T-shirt.

The music and imagery in the last two clips has been getting super soap opera-ish.

And when Manon shows up, the other girls are wearing their normal clothes, jeans and comfy clothes. Again, why did Manon need the dress?

Heh, how much did they pay for the rights to sing Happy Birthday? Or is it only in the US that you have to cough up a pretty penny to use it on TV?

I looked it up and apparently the song was officially recognized to be in the public domain in 2016! Good to know.

The girls are very cute performing Happy Birthday, though. Love the placement of the birthday hats at jaunty angles.

I’m not really qualified to talk about this as a non-Norwegian but I’ve read a bit about the patriotic themes in S2, and how it’s fitting that Noora tells the girls on Constitution Day (how living in a free, democratic country means you have to believe the law will protect you from assholes like Niko) and that ties in to the overall motifs of the season, and so that’s obviously lost here. It’s a missed opportunity, especially with the article. I think if they tried harder they could have written, you know ... something that related more to this adaptation and French youth, instead of repeating a speech that specifically about Norwegian culture. That’s the bare minimum, my dudes.

Like when Daphne says they need to go to the police because they’re in France and the law will protect them ... I mean, sure, but it’s just one of those things that lacks the thematic relevance of the original as it’s not a national holiday at the time.

(They’re going to do 21:21 for S3 without any changes, aren’t they? Goddammit. I will believe them that they’re changing the storyline when I see it and not just hear it.)

A minor nitpick: I also feel like it’s kinda odd to read her article aloud? It made sense with Noora since it related to the holiday they were celebrating and could fit into their festivities but this is just a random article. In that case I’d find it weird if my friends just started reading something I’d written out loud. I mean it’s one thing to congratulate her for a job well done but IDK, felt out of place.

But Emma only gets a few lines in, so thankfully we didn’t have to hear the whole thing awkwardly re-purposed for this remake.

Poor Manon with tears in her eyes. Her acting continues to be very good. Manon is more openly emotional and sad than Noora, who seems more like she freezes or shuts down or tries to close herself off.

Hug pile :(

Loved to see Daphne be at the forefront of taking Manon to the hospital and supporting her while they’re there.

Clip 4 - Justice

Nico is such a rat.

Also his ass is dumb.

But that’s no surprise.

Manon is more no nonsense and less playing with Nico than Noora was.

Actually I preferred that they cut out the line about not dropping the soap and had her throw her drink in his face instead, good job, Manon! That was satisfying.

Clip 5 - The point of no return

So. This is the part when watching the original series where I knew I could never like William or Noorhelm.

I’m going to go into a personal tangent, skip if you want. I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned how I got into Skam in one of these recaps so my apologies if I’m repeating the story.

I discovered Skam completely randomly during S3, via a YouTube recommendation. Of all things, strangely it was because I had watched a preview for the show Eyewitness, which was an American remake of a Norwegian show about two boys who witness some murders while making out in the woods. I enjoy crime stories/mysteries and the premise sounded intriguing, so I watched the first 10 minutes of the pilot that the network had put on YouTube as a teaser, and then some interviews talking about the show. Eyewitness turned out to not to be my thing and I didn’t watch more than a few episodes, but because I’d watched it, YouTube started recommending me clips from other shows with gay couples, including Skam. One night I was bored and decided to finally click on one of the Skam clips. I was hooked right away, impressed by the writing, directing, acting, and chemistry.

This was still really early in Skam’s viral spread during the fall/winter of 2016. There wasn’t nearly the amount of information and organized how-to-watch-Skam guides available in English at this point. I learned about the social media concept and real-time distribution of the show from reading the YouTube comments. The first clip I got to watch in real time was the pool scene. If you were there at the time, you might remember the 10-day hiatus between episodes 5 and 6. That was when I decided to watch seasons 1 and 2. Before that point, I had not heard a single bad thing about Noorhelm, William, or S2. In fact, I only heard overwhelming praise from the YouTube comments - people commenting that they missed William, encouraging people to watch the previous seasons and singling out S2 as an amazing storyline (and a number of people saying S1 was boring but to stick it out to S2), telling people Noora and William’s relationship was fantastic. I mention this because for some reason, certain fans are under the impression that people decided to randomly hate S2/Noorhelm/William based on opinions they read on Tumblr and it’s only bandwagon hate. So this is just to say - I did not go into S2 with any negative expectations. I wouldn’t even say I was hyping it too much in my mind so that I was bound to be disappointed. I just expected it to be decent television.

I watched S1 in like a day and loved it. I especially admired how all of the characters had both good and bad sides, and how the characters who easily could have been demonized, like Ingrid and Iben, were made into human and sympathetic figures by the season’s end. Did not love William’s behavior at all, thought he was a creep, but hey, he apologized to Vilde at the end of the season! That must be the character development I saw people mention in the comments! And so I reasoned that S2 would redeem William and manage to sell me on Noora/William. It wasn’t my preferred storyline but I loved S1 and I loved what had been released of S3 so far, so they could probably make me enjoy it, right? And besides, S1 had been pretty good in a lot of ways about sexism and gender roles, I trusted the show to continue that into S2.

So I started S2. And I saw William text Noora even when she’d rejected him. Okay, I thought, not a great start, but it’s the beginning of the season. Surely this behavior will be addressed, and he has plenty of time to change his attitude. And I saw William use Vilde in order to finally get Noora on that date. Yikes, I thought, I thought he was supposed to get better? This is textbook male entitlement. I didn’t feel OK with his behavior.

But OK, we’re only on episode 2! So much time to turn it around! And then we learned that William apologized to Vilde in exchange for a date with Noora. Errrr, that makes his apology a lot less satisfying and much more self-serving, I thought. And then I watched William take Noora on a date, and Noora confront William with his shitty behavior toward her and Vilde, and to my great bafflement, I saw William not express regret for his actions, but instead justify his actions not once, but repeatedly, with reasons that were flimsy at best and appalling at worst. I saw Noora tell William he had manipulated her in order to get her on that date and William deny it and turn it back on Noora. The scene made me furious. At that moment I hated William even more than I’d disliked him in S1 - because S1 was supposed to show him at his worst and ended with a moment of him displaying some self-improvement. Why the fresh hell would we then get this scene that effectively erased that character growth in order to show how selfish his motivations really were? I hated that scene. Hated hated hated it.

We were still early in the season, though. And episode 3 had admittedly a nice scene of Noora and William hanging out together - it was a nice scene because Noora was so cute, though, not because of much to do with William, and marred by William saying some misogynistic crap and then not owning up to it when called on it. But all right. It was progress.

Throughout the season, however, there was a pattern, where there would be a moment where William seemed decent for a fraction of a second, only to show his ass and do something I found obnoxious, entitled, or awful shortly afterwards. The midseason peak was him bashing a bottle over a dude’s head, justifying it, and belittling Noora for not understanding his Great and Important motivations for bashing a bottle over the guy’s head. This was followed by a scene I found horrific in which the show’s designated voice of reason told Noora that she needed to understand why her boyfriend bashed a bottle over a guy’s head, or else it was unreasonable and just like how war begins or some shit like that, in response to Noora’s objections to her boyfriend being violent. Viewing this scene was deeply surreal, as I was aware that this was the voice of the writer telling me why I should like William or why it was wrong for me to dislike William. The scene’s message made no sense in context.

At this point I had realized I probably wasn’t going to like William - in addition to his crappy behavior and attitude, he wasn’t written in a particularly compelling or 3D way, and the performance wasn’t charismatic enough to hold my interest (although I want to stress that it wasn’t the deal-breaker and I could tolerate mediocre acting for a well-written complex character). Yet I held out a little bit of hope that there would be an 11th hour revelation or redemption arc where we could see how much William had grown and the sexism and male entitlement that had been threaded throughout the season would be addressed properly. We got William calming down Noora from anxiety in what I thought was a genuinely lovely scene. I didn’t much care for him writing the article but it wasn’t something I hated him for. For a moment, things seemed like they might turn around.

And then, we came to this clip. The point of no return.

A scene in which William gets in Noora’s face, towers over her, doesn’t hear her out, shakes her off and leaves her crying in the middle of the schoolyard.

That would be bad enough as it is, though I can maybe understand his reaction in the heat of the moment. Maybe. But it wasn’t until I read the text messages afterwards that I was well and truly done. Noora texts William like an hour after this scene happens. She explicitly says that if anything happened between her and Niko, it would have been assault, she blacked out, and she’s pressed charges against Niko. And William ignored her for days afterwards.

This is so unbelievably cruel that it killed any hope I had for this storyline, it killed any possibility that I could like his character or root for this relationship. He knows she might have been raped and he ignores her when she is pleading for him to talk to her. He doesn’t reach out to her on his own, either; it takes Noora tracking him down and demanding his attention. I don’t remember him ever specifically apologizing for this behavior (if he did and I forgot about it, feel free to remind me). He apologizes for Niko. Not for himself.

Imagine Noora, who still thinks she may have been assaulted, who is still dealing with the trauma, having to also deal with the boyfriend she loves abandoning her and shutting her out. Imagine how tender William was with her earlier in the episode as he saw she was breaking down, and how it feels when he withdraws that tenderness after he finds out the reason why she was breaking down in the first place.

Let’s not even get into the real-life context of this scene, and how rape victims are often treated like dirt by friends, family, and romantic partners after they come forward about their assault. Let’s just mention that rape victims fear their loved ones won’t believe them, will blame them, or reject them, to the point where it’s a huge factor in why they don’t come forward, and that what happens with Noora here when William leaves is the embodiment of that fear.

It’s not just that William has flaws. Everyone on this show has flaws. It’s the way his flaws are handled. There is too much baggage with his character in terms of real-life sexism and gender roles, too little remorse and empathy from the character himself, that it’s beyond what I can enjoy in a fictional love interest.

“We don’t know what Niko may have told him.” That’s true, and I did consider that at the time. But you know what? William knows Niko is a creep. If Niko made any kinds of threats toward Noora, if there was any way he misled William other than just saying Noora was a slut who threw herself at him or anything we could have predicted knowing what we’ve seen from Niko, we needed to hear about it once the situation had been cleared up. Julie needed to have William explain so we know he at least had an understandable, non-self-centered motivation for reacting the way he did.

“William was just hurt/didn’t know how to deal.” I cannot stress how much I don’t give a shit about how William was so hurt compared to how Noora must feel in this situation. Noora told him rape may have happened. Why in the world would I prioritize William’s feelings over the feelings of a sexual assault victim in relation to her own potential rape?

Fuck William. Fuck Charles. Fuck this narrative that is constantly putting a guy’s boner feels and manpain above the female lead’s agency, rational concerns, and mental health. Fuck this narrative that is constantly encouraging us to empathize and understand an entitled dude’s emotions and actions, including sexism and violence, while the same entitled dude shows little empathy or understanding for a potential rape victim, a girl whose self-image was damaged by him telling her she wasn’t attractive enough, or a girl who rejects him romantically. Fuck the double standards of women having to understand and empathize with men when they are behaving like assholes but men not having to empathize or show compassion to women, including when they are victimized, by putting aside their own feelings for a goddamn minute.

Anyway, back to the Skam France clip.

Daphne got aroused from kissing Emma … hmmm

Once again, absolutely no comment from or about the supposedly bi girl sitting right there with them, which might change the context of the scene a bit.

This soap opera music starting as Charles comes thundering up to Manon.

DID THIS ASSHOLE MOVE IMANE OUT OF THE WAY WHEN SHE TOLD HIM TO WAIT

FUCK YOU DUDE

DID HE SHOVE MANON AGAINST THE WINDOW

“Answer yes or no” “I don’t know.” YOUR FIRST CLUE, JACKASS.

oh BOO FUCKING HOO Charles is crying, so glad this is about his hurt feelings and not his girlfriend potentially being raped.

Oh cool and he knocked her on the floor so she’s crying on the ground, great, she thinks she might have been raped and here’s what we have now.

SHE TEXTS HIM AFTERWARDS. AND TELLS HIM. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN AGAINST HER WILL.

HOW DID THEY MAKE THIS SCENE WORSE

General Comments

I was willing to give Marles a chance in the hopes that they would rewrite the worst parts of this relationship, but instead it’s like they’ve double down on Charles’ domineering bullshit and it makes me so angry. That’s really all I have to say.

I’m not French so if I misunderstood some context, feel free to correct me.

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

#skamfr reactions

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