#why am I physically incapable of putting in any effort whatsoever

[myname-isnia]

*randomly watch some youtube video about drawing*

*get inspiration to draw*

*open drawing app*

*remembers I can’t draw*

*:/*

#okay look #I can draw one thing #girls with neutral expressions from the chest up facing either forward or 2/3 or 3/4 #(​not sideways though :/) #I will admit that I’ve gotten pretty damn good at that even if the proportions still tend to be wonky #but drawing literally anything else? #usually I just shamelessly trace over a reference picture. not even try to copy it by eye bc I’m awful at replication #straight up trace over and mess around with the details in some places #AND BEFORE ANYONE COMES AT ME I MEAN POSE WISE I DON’T TRACE ANYTHING ELSE #I’m also not too bad at colouring but my shading needs a ton of work #so.. yeah. by all standards I can’t really draw #I also can’t draw facial expressions or poses or backgrounds or objects or interactions #or anything really #is it any wonder 90% of my procreate gallery is stuff I never finished.. #I know this is all my fault because I never practice what I want to get good at #I never do studies or draw smth over and over again to get better or anything #if I can’t draw something I delete the canvas and give up. end of story #ughhhhhhh. why am I like this #why am I physically incapable of putting in any effort whatsoever #and I dare call myself an artist #I don’t deserve that title