thatbpdgirl

[thatbpdgirl]

#Useful framework! #Mental health #Coping mechanisms #Officially my favorite commentary on this meme

[thatbpdgirl]

🎶Crying on a Wednesday night after I was supposed to be in bed 🎶

#My mom told me today that she and my dad are divorcing #And like I knew this was coming #Bc i literally gave her permission a few months ago bc I know she's really unhappy #But she confirmed it today that she's had that conversation with him #And I'm the only one of my siblings who knows #And I can't say anything to them yet #So once again I'm my mother's secret keeper #But no one in my life seems to care or want to be here for me through it #I just.... Really need someone to be here with me while I process this #And everyone has their own shit to deal with #So I'm alone #Again #Fuck. This has been up in the air for more than a decade #As far as I'm concerned #And I just feel like I'm 14 again and aware of everything happening and not able to control anything #And no one there to help me figure it out

[thatbpdgirl]

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#Woke up in a real bad headspace #Pretty sure not a single person gives a fuck about me #Unless I'm doing something for them #But only that far #Ugh I don't wanna be a human today

[thatbpdgirl]

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#Good gods #I'm so stupid and thoughtless and useless #Why can't I do even a single thing right?

[thatbpdgirl]

Tactile hallucinations Thursday? Is that a thing now? Really?

#This is a response to my body/brain being weird not some trend btw #Psychosis #Hallucinations #borderline personality disorder #I. Feel. THINGS. Dripping. Down. My. Back. #WHY? this is awful

[thatbpdgirl]

today’s opinion: NPD needs to be renamed and the term “narcissist” needs to be demedicalized. the term has been colloquially hijacked beyond recognition and the word alone creates an insurmountable stigma for patients

#LITERALLY #Npd #stigmatisation

[thatbpdgirl]

Ugh

Another day another psychotic episode

#donut rebagle

[thatbpdgirl]

It was stupid to think anyone would actually want me

[thatbpdgirl]

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#Got the sads again #Feeling like i have to fight and flail for attention or i dont exist #Hating that #Super sensitive to feeling ignored rn i guess #Fun #Mountains out of molehills

[thatbpdgirl]

Ever have one of those days where you wake up just positive that everyone in your life would be better off if you didn't exist and that you're just a placeholder in their lives for when the Actual Right People come along?

.... Yeah.

#Negative #BPD

[thatbpdgirl]

I am so tired of my skin and my brain being against me. I feel so fucking disgusting bc of this skin condition and my brain just turns that up to 11.

I can't stop thinking in always/never format. I will always be repulsive. I will never be anyone's first choice. Its so exhausting and I feel bad bc i "should" be past this. Why can't I just get a good day? Or even an ok one? Why am I unworthy of being happy? Why am I practically invisible to everyone in my life?

#donut rebagel #Personal

[thatbpdgirl]

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#Hoo boy i wanna hurt myself #Like brain can we not??? #Would be awesome to have a feeling that didn't hurt someday #Love the impermanence buddy. Real good job on that

[thatbpdgirl]

My favourite thing about being mentally ill is I can’t tell if I’m in an abusive relationship or if it’s me overdramatising things and making myself suffer

#What a mood #Abuse cw

[thatbpdgirl]

Why is it OK for me to break myself to be there for you but you can't spare a fucking second in your day to reach out to me?

[thatbpdgirl]

I just want someone to care about me as much as I do about them

#Fuck everything

[thatbpdgirl]

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#Hoo boy #Brain just turned and now I want to die cool #My work is shutting down temporarily after tomorrow #Who knows if I'll be getting paid #And then a stupid thing set me off and I'm spiraling #And feeling like no one cares about me #Why am I like this?

[thatbpdgirl]

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#Still wanna hurt myself but who the fuck cares?