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Remember that you're lucky

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Learning can also involve unlearning, relearning and just reminding yourself.

Josh Ballan, Sunday School Insight, January 1, 2023

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Magnifization and Minimization.

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BALLAN: A New Name on the Rise.

I just learned that Balian is a name in the Philippines. Mainly in the bikol

#Youtube

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A Great Leap Forward

Ballan Version

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Don't be that husband who only contributes money to the family.

I am a big believer in the patriarchy. I believe men must be at the highest standard of their manhood to make their families successful in this imperfect world. They need to be wise, revered and charitable to their wives, children and to all men. I believe that men must be able to provide for and protect their wives and children while maintaining a consecrated vision that moves them to a better position in life.

Today as women have become more assertive and engaged in all aspects of life, I observe that some of the men have been forbearing to the point they have become decadent and focused on the responsibilities that only are convenient for them. I fear that the men will be weakened and unqualified, and the women will not only have to double the responsibility that already have but also remove their life from womanhood.

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The Crown of Ballan

There's a throne that only a few will sit on.

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"And here we are again, doing it alone."

Alpha and Saint

#SoundCloud

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Tugang

#SoundCloud

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I would stop the world, just to spend more time with you here in mortality.

Woman,

It's been a while since I've written you the things in my head. These past few weeks I have been tired and stressed to the point I was just excited to die. One time you said to me to not leave you made me think. I really don't want to leave you. And you gave me more reason to continue and push harder while being able to take things slow so that I won't kill myself. You help me in my sleepless nights and drowsy days. You made me love mortality more than I loved it before. I appreciated our journey in this life and am still enjoying it with you by my side.

For me, Mortality is a phase where we will live in a world of good or evil and not a world of followers. Where we are free to act on ourselves to do that is ought to be done according to our judgement. And one of those best choices was having you in my life. I have never experienced life so tormenting and yet bearable because it has refined us to be the being we are meant to be. We are not resisting nor fighting the pain but rather enduring it. Carrying all the way, until we can say we're strong enough to ignore it. I have excelled in ways I couldn't imagine. I've suffered ways I couldn't bear. But in the end. I'm happy in ways that I couldn't comprehend.

I like spending mortality with you. In fact, I would stop the world from spinning as Elijah did, to spend a little more time with you.

#Letters to wife #SoundCloud

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26th ~

Josh and I have this inside joke, that's been going on for years now, where he tells me my birthday is on the 19th June. Idk where he got it from, he doesn't even know where he got it from either. It was just one day during our 2nd year as bf/gf, i think, that he spewed out that date lol. Anywaaaaay,

The News.

It was just this Monday 19th June 2023, he greeted me a "happy birthday" and told me to take a leave on my actual birthday - 22nd. The hubs has a surprise for meee! I was actually thinking of any fun activities around here in Manila, but he just laughed and asked me (non-verbatim) "do you want to do your fun activities or my surprise?". Duh, i want the surprise ofc. And so I filed the leave.

The Surprise.

The day after, he asked me the golden question - "you want to go to Baguio?" Again.... DUH???! Kidding, I hugged him excitingly and fixed our things.

Josh is never the travel planner. He likes it spontaneous, while I like it organized and prepared. The plan was to wake me up in the middle of the night and ask me to go out and ride the car clueless and unprepared. But him knowing me, i might get mad because again... I like things organized. Plus, I'm a woman! I can't leave without my skin care, ootd, etc. So he had to tell me where we're going for the 2-day trip. Haha I win.

Baguio.

We didn't have an itinerary and we have limited time, so we didn't get to go to a lot of places, but we made it fun.

📍 Burnham Park

📍 The Mansion

📍 Wright Park

📍 Night Market - We were busy eating and shopping that we forgot to do a countdown to 12mn! It still counts as birthday salubong, right?

📍 Mines View Park

📍 SM Baguio

In summary of the trip: There was the rainy Baguio, the sleep deprived because of the travel Ballans, the Josh who had to work graveyard shift pa rin (sipag!!), and the fulfilling moments because we get to blend in with the locals for using the Ilocano language again that we missed so much since our missions.

Hubs' Efforts.

2 days for a trip is very quick, yet Josh made it very memorable. What touched me the most is the fact that he was still working during the trip. He said his 1-week salary is the budget/his gift for me huhu cutie, I'm so spoiled. Another sweet thing, he created a private video montage of his candid videos of me from his phone! Ahhhhck my heart is bursting!

Lovey, thank you. We've been together since I was 22. Now that I'm 4 years older, you've now met all 26 personalities of Eunice. Haha. Thank you for loving, hating, and being with all the monsters inside me. Thank you for the surprise. I know I am hard to please, but you did it... again. Just like you surprise my heart with love, laughter and affection each and every single day. I love you and I am very lucky to be called your wife.

Twenty-six.

I mean, I already accepted being old - back pains, adulting probs, etc. Other than that, I'm so grateful for every experience and every learning that I acquired for the last 26 years. I have so much wins and losses to celebrate this year, and I'm glad I got to do it with my little family.

Now, another year. Am I scared? A bit. Am I excited? Of course. Am I ready? I don’t know, maybe and maybe not. But I’ll figure it out. Looking forward to many more Blessings, Trials, Challenges, and Achievements.

Alright! 26th chapter, let’s go!

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The Future of ASEAN - The Collectivist Dream 🇸🇬

Singapore. The place that brought my childhood back to life. Everything is extremely efficient. From their transportation system to their land use. Things are allocated productively and efficiently. Although it's not perfect, I would say that they earned to have the title of "developed country". Surely, people in Singapore are lucky to have a country like this.

The Day

We started staying at an old humble hotel called South East Asia Hotel. It's an old Chinese hotel with some of the basic parts of what you expect a hotel has. What I like about it is how the room is really like an old house similar to the one in our grandmother's. I also like the idea of how efficient they are in using the aircon by putting a ceiling fan on top to efficiently spread the cold air. This gave the room a temperature that is not too cold which makes my nose and lips dry, but also not too warm that I might sweat as I tuck myself into the thick blanket.

The Elderly - An asset to the economy?

The first thing I noticed in the morning is how a lot of old people working outside. Street Vendors, Service Crew, Train Station Guards and even the front desk of the hotel were old people. This gives me a mixed feeling of amazement and sadness at the same time as I see the joy of them finding themselves useful and productive which gives them meaning in their lives. The other side, however, is I see how they are already tired but they still need to work as they didn't have anything for retirement. This gives me another impression of Singapore. Most of the homeless are old people as well. You can usually see them sleeping somewhere on the side of a street or selling tissue napkins. Although there are a lot of programs on how to help these elderly some of them chose to be homeless rather than joining in the program. Which was kind of interesting to me.

The Real Hustle Street

This of course why explains their culture. You can tell that everyone needs to keep working and moving to sustain the country. When you even go to their train station. I assure you that not a single person walked less than 10 kph. Like literally you need to stand on the left side of the elevator so that the one who is rushing in can get through. And the elevator? You need to be quick on your feet else you might be catapulted. (That's an exaggeration but you get the idea of how things move in Singapore). The environment of innovation, work and productivity is just so strong in Singapore that even you (a piece of crap) will feel you achieved something in life without doing anything yet. I can understand where this kind of culture comes from. Since Singapore doesn't have any resources its best assets are its people and that made them competitive which sparked a survival culture.

And yet the Beauty of it all.

Despite the orderly chaos, the busy people, the fast-paced systems and just everything related to it, there is so much beauty in this place that I just can't believe a country possesses. The creative use of technology, preserving their ecosystem, fascinating architecture, efficient use of landscape and infrastructure and the marvel of its iconic spots; Universal Studios, Merlion, Marina Bay and the Durian (Fly Eyes). You can appreciate almost everything you see, touch, hear and feel and just marvel at how this was created within only over 50 years. Did I also mention that I've never seen a police officer roaming around? Yes, surprisingly, police are only located in public places such as airports, train stations, etc… They do, however, have stations where you can report, and they will respond quicker than ours. They are well-organized, kind and disciplined. They are not perfect, of course. They have their issues, but as far as making things work, I might say, they kinda nailed it.

Mansion or a Home

Singapore is the best place to hustle, leisure and explore. However, in my humble opinion, I would still prefer the Philippines when it comes to settling in. Singapore is a place to visit for fun and excitement, but I doubt that I will stay to settle down. Even some of our friends in Singapore said that the country is too fast for them. That's why they go to Malaysia to chill and relax. With great prosperity comes great productive responsibility. I can understand why other countries admire their qualities and growth*. Even I dreamed that one day we could experience this kind of living standard in my country.

*Although there are debates on how long this will last as they have many resources other than their people. I can say that the ability to make a country prosperous using limited resources is an indicator that they are doing great.

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The Nation of My Race, An Extension of My Home. 🇲🇾

Malaysia, the land of the Malayan people and a name that was supposedly trademarked by the Philippines if it weren't for those pesky Brits. However, this is a land that I could tell that is already my home. Change the demographics of Tsinoy with Indians with a vibe of Mindanao - and tada! You have Malaysia! Different country, but same kind and warm people. But since the Philippines and Malaysia have a controversial history, it's inescapable to have antagonizing feelings when mentioning where we are from. That said, these feelings are driven by politics and national history but on an individual level we have the same respect and tolerance as most ASEANs do. For me, South East Asia is my home and although we have our differences, that shouldn't be something to argue about, but rather to embrace and celebrate it.

We started our day living in Ahyu Hotel, an Indian hotel located in Little India (duh) in Kuala Lumpur. One thing I noticed about Kuala Lumpur is that the roads are tight yet the drivers are extremely fast. People here are driving 140 kph as if it's a norm. Not to mention motorcycles driving in a walking lane. Yes, the Freaking Pedestrian lane! What a very interesting culture indeed (but then again, similar to PH).

Another thing I noticed is the food, I love how they use peanuts in almost every dish. One of my favourites is the mochi - a chewy snack with a lot of nuts on it. They also have this soy milk which is very famous near the Chinese-Indian Street Market. But perhaps the most highlighted of them all is the Chinese Beef Noodles - now this is a must-try. my wife and I are eating in this Chinese Noodle house and boy the attention of the crowd just went onto us. Especially me. You can tell on their face; "Why is this is Indian-Jakartan idiot doing with a White Malaysian?". The eyes from my head all the way to my feet was some sort of fascination (or confusion) of why I was doing there. Even the people in the kitchen are looking at me. Are we celebrities? Aliens? Interracial couples that had a fixed marriage due to parental pressure and poverty? No! We're tourists trying out new things and we ask to eat our noodles and judge people in peace.

And now, the fun parts.

Of course, this vacation blog won't be complete without the funny things I discovered in Malaysia. Again, like I said, it's almost the same as the Philippines but different. First and foremost, People jaywalk but to the next level, (and I really mean jaywalk - like it's still a red light jaywalk) Second, Grocery stores are great but I kinda miss how the baggers are well organized at home - which I kinda owe an apology for not being grateful for. Baggers in Malaysian grocery usually stack everything in the bag without measuring any kind of geometry between the plastic size and the items. So I had to take them out again and reorganize them so that the bag is well balanced and well-shaped (See SM store bag shape when full of groceries so you will know what I'm talking about). Third, is the smell of curry everywhere!! ☺️ My wife doesn't like it, but I don't mind. Fourth, is electric scooters are parked almost everywhere on the street. Like really a random scooter will just appear while you're walking in the street. And Finally, of all the places I have been – pedestrians have been jaywalked, and going over the speed limit on the road, I've only seen 4 police officers in my whole trip. Like seriously, are they that strong in the rule of law? Or are they undermanned? That said, I've never seen anything dangerous in Kuala Lumpur except cheeky salesmanship. I would say it's a great place and a beautiful country.

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The Measure of Strength

What does it mean to be strong? Does it always have to be fierce, tough or revolutionary? Every time we see a person who resists, fights back or takes revenge often give us this slight satisfaction of justice is prevailing and strength exists in that person. I, too sometimes admire people who have a very low tolerance for mistreatment and unfairness. There were times when I just ask what if I fought back, what if I resisted or what if I just say “No”. These were just some thoughts on how I wished I could have been a strong person. But that led me to ask another question. What is the measure of strength?

Resistance

Resistance is hard, it takes effective confrontation, bravery, and even emotional discipline of being thick-skinned and bold. We often celebrate resistance especially if it’s for a good cause, such as injustices and unfair systems of society. We have that sense of happiness when we see the person who causes these hardships “gets what they deserve” as if “karma”, has finally caught up to them. People who tend to resist are commonly those who have a short temper for mistreatment or are easily persuaded to settle things through violence or non-violent confrontations. We also see them as people with anger issues not easy to be dealt with and sometimes, people we avoid unless we needed their behaviour to fix things.

Endurance

However, I also pondered the people of submitted and endure. People who took the patience to wait, hold and bear. People who just cried things out and hope for better days. Shouldn’t these be acknowledged as strengths as well? Apparently not, as for my observation these traits are known from people who are timid, soft-hearted and expected the world to be kind. Which is why they prefer to flee rather than fight. I somehow feel awe of how they endure adversaries and still, keep the kindness in their hearts to have faith that things will pass. And I admire that. For me, these are people who are just equally strong as people who want a revolution. The ability to endure, submit and even forgive is one of the few and strongest men can do.

Who is stronger?

Whether who is stronger is a question depending on who views it. But I am more concerned as people are accused to be weak because they are timid and soft is something I wish to change. Sometimes some of us, in fact, many of us, don’t like to suffer. And yet that suffering is the one that keeps us innocent from the tyrants. How I wish we can view strength as much as we view beauty like flowers. Some are fragrant but dull, while others are elegant yet thorny. To be strong is rested in everyone's ability to resist and endure and we should be harsh in judging them for being weak just because it is not the same as ours.

#ballan #thebrethrenpost

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Essentials for Humans

The world is cruel. No doubt about that. The unfairness and injustices we continue to experience are likely inevitable and won’t disappear anytime soon. Why? Because it always has been. As George Bernard Shaw once said; “We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.” Since humans have a limited lifespan, it lacks the experience of the needed learning in life to change their telestial nature. However, it doesn’t necessarily mean that Man is evil, we can say they’re poor, dumb or immature as they tend to choose their self-interest and safety rather than the common good. And yet that’s when I realized the despite that there are things that are still essential for humans. And these what I’ve come up with:

Kindness

We start at the core of our character and that is our intention to do good to the world all around us. Kindness is the most attainable characteristic in your human hood. In fact, kindness is already there in your nature. Knowing you have a conscience that makes you feel happy when you did something right or troubled if you did something wrong is already a piece of evidence that you are a rational being capable of being a good person. However, I want you to learn beyond this type of kindness. Kindness is not just being proactive in doing something morally right. It is also how to effectively react within the given situation around us. It’s learning how to face adversaries, learning how to struggle well and also dealing with other people better. As Ted Koppel once said; “Aspire to decency. Practice civility toward one another. Admire and emulate ethical behavior wherever you find it. Apply a rigid standard of morality to your lives; and if, periodically, you fail ­ as you surely will ­ adjust your lives, not the standards”. I believe these are essentials to us for our survival and well-being. By learning these skills, you will improve your life with peace and joy whatever the circumstances.

Strength

Strength is one of the characteristics that made the human being survive in this earth. If people are strong, they are capable of doing and successfully achieving their goals. Although strength is often represented as the extreme physical aspects, such as lifting something heavy, enduring a painful experience or winning a fight. Strength can also resemble other simple things. It's also about maintaining small simple habits so you won't go weak for long periods of time. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle is one of them. Eating a proper diet, getting enough exercise and having enough sleep are common but important ways to maintain strength. You must do everything you can to improve your health and well-being both physically and mentally. Because what doesn't kill may make us stronger in the short run but actually deteriorates us in the long run. So eat your greens and live longer as you try to survive.

Wisdom

When I talk about wisdom I'm not talking about having a high IQ, good reasoning skills or math. I was more talking about having a growth mindset. Which means dealing with your unknowing and honestly learning something. I commended people who acknowledge that they're 'idiots' and yet has that strong enthusiasm for learning. Usually, these are the people that are likely willing to adapt and change for the better. This also builds innovation that will greatly contribute to society than those who are complacent. Another factor of wisdom is the ability to think independently. Thinking independently will allow you to build curiosity and challenge the existing knowledge that is already accepted as the conventional truth. This results in the Innovation that I just mentioned. Having a growth mindset and the ability to think independently will advance you to gain more wisdom than others. You will fail, improve and excel. And no matter how many times you're proven wrong if you only became right one time. It'll make you a genius and legend.

So far, these are the 3 things essential for humans. Although there a lot more that I can think of. This should give you a good start on what to reflect for yourself and what area you can improve on. I still struggle the 2nd one but hey, that’s what makes us human. :)

#thebrethrenpost lifeskills

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The Philosophy of God

We live in a world where indeed we have surpassed the capacity of the average man can do. We are now much learned, more capable and even courageous on things that can’t be challenge because we are afraid of society’s reaction. Woke culture is a good example on how people challenge systems that are unfair and difficult to people who are in a disadvantage. 

One of the challenges everyone face is people don’t want their “truths” to be questioned, tested or proven. But I believe that most of the harshest truths in life will allow us to become more converted to reality rather to our own biases. And this I believe is the difference between the philosophy of men and the philosophy of God. 

The Difference Between Philosophies

In comparison, we can tell the difference of these to philosophies through its characteristics and its nature. Firstly, the philosophy of God seeks and glorifies truth meaning it doesn’t care about being right or wrong, it wants to know what is true. On the other hand, the philosophy of Men escapes and denies truth. Meaning it’s not concerned on knowing what is true but rather wants to find ways to distort it to make their truth, if not acceptable, at least justified. 

Secondly, the philosophy of God is simple and which enlightens thinking and expands your understanding for more truth. In the contrast, not only the philosophy of man can be complicated, it has cause a confusion that lasted hundreds of years for man to find the satisfaction from its search for answers. There are a lot of differences between the philosophies of God and man. But in a nutshell, these are the basic difference.

What is God’s Philosophy?

One thing that people are confused sometimes is whether to know what truth is a philosophy of God. Truth is reality that has existed and has never changed since the beginning of time. Truths like life, death, love and all other truths that you have known and experience in your time. Another example of philosophy of God is call the Gospel, which is a pattern of living where man can live life to its fullest and as is. These were taught by Plato, Buddha, Confucius and Jesus Christ. Whatever that allows you to live with meaning, virtue or the highest standard of being, you will experience for yourself that it is indeed from God. And the deeper you will discover this Gospel, the greater you see the betterment of you character, nature and even being.

Can Religion be a Philosophy of Man?

Like Man as a human being, it is not perfect. It has its shortcomings and mystery that will lead you to an endless loop of curiosity which can sometimes lead to the extreme. Like its nature, man has an uncontrollable urge when not handled properly. This is why we have fanaticism or extremism, where sometimes truth is so harsh people want to challenge it by force and victimization. They can’t prove it wrong but will reason it as incomplete, unfair and evil. This is where sometimes become worrisome when those who are devoted to a religion that we become hostile to faiths or those who are educated started use their knowledge and expertise to expand an a unrighteous cause. You can see this in universities, political parties and even churches. Where people want to believe they are right rather than knowing the truth.

Conclusion

I don’t care which philosophy you choose nor will judge you on why choosing it. As a human being myself I have my own believability therefore you and I are entitled to choose whether which way we want to live, where you want to be a stoic, religious, agnostic or anything I wish for you the best and that you may know the truth for yourself and stick to which ever philosophy you seemed best fit. 

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A Quarter of a Century.

Special Thanks to My Wife.

It’s been a quarter of a century and look how far we have been. To be honest, these past few days has been given me a lot of thought. On what to do on the second phase of my life. Yes, I call it second phase because I plan to live up-to a 100th. Hahaha. There has been a lot of stress that has been bugging me within the plans, goals and even the current events happening in my life. My worries, regrets or whatever unpleasant feelings that have been bugging my head preventing me to sleep. But then, when my birthday started everything was starting to cool down. I really appreciate my wife being there for me. For comforting me despite of the manhood shell. There are time where I couldn’t explain myself clearly and yet she still gives the empathy to understand. And even when I woke up. After going to the temple, everything that was bugging my head started to calm down. I also started to notice small influences of positivity in my mind. For all the gifts that I received in my birthday having a compassionate helpmeet is more that I could ever ask for. Shout out to the woman who has been giving me the best birthday surprises since Day 1. ❤️

Things that used to be and are.

I was scrolling in the facebook memories and came across with this post way back 2017 (about 6 years ago).

I was indeed just a crappy person, clumsy and reckless yet a pure intention to love people. And it’s been a long way if I look back now. A tremendous amount of difference in the development of my character and identity. To be honest I miss that rascal. I miss those days when I was stupid and yet confident. A righteous idiot that had the audacity to do unordinary things and still managed to be lovable. Oh I miss that boy. But now, it’s time to be a man. Not only to do things I passionate love but even do things that are awfully required for the sake of my family and generation. And that’s the one the bugs me all night. Bring me worry in work and fear to the unknown future. But after this day, I know everything’s going to be okay. It won’t as the same as they used to be, (like in this picture) but it’s going to work out in the end. It has been and will always be. I know it. Happy Birthday Ballan.

#birthday #thebrethrenpost #25th