theogygiaisland

[theogygiaisland]

rich asshole: is there an assassin I can hire?

shiva *nudging cass*: this should have been you

cass: mom not now

shiva: not asking for a lesbian batman are they

cass: mom im trying to save someone literally right now

shiva: go see if throwing a batarang helps

#cass cain #cassandra cain #shiva

[theogygiaisland]

I NEED YOU TO UNDERSTAND THAT I LOST MY SHIT AT THIS MOMENT. It's the most emotionally constipated backhand compliment and paranoid control freak showing his love thing I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. He's friends with Barry, Arthur, Diana, Ollie, that means something for Batman to say that, but then he'll turn right around and say, "But I don't trust their judgement for shit when it comes to my kid, who by the way, is clearly the best trained out of all you, because he's the best period, and I'm not risking my precious son on your dumb sidekicks." HELP PLEASE HE'S THE WORST AND THE BEST HE LOVES HIS KID IN THE WORST POSSIBLE AND MOST HILARIOUS WAY

#love that for him #batman #bruce wayne #tim drake #robin

[theogygiaisland]

The one year Jason offers to make Dick’s birthday cake:

#my birthday cake this year #literally sent this to everyone who greeted me #im OLD OLD #batfam #jason todd #dick grayson

[theogygiaisland]

i really like it when batman & robin are doing their freakyweird hiding in the shadows thing so theyre just drawn like ◺ ◿ o o

#batfam #batman #robin

[theogygiaisland]

i love how fucked up the concept of hereditary guilt is (like the idea of the "sins of the father" or bastardry laws). what if your ancestors fucked up so bad that your agency in whether or not to accept responsibility for the consequences of their actions was considered forfeit before you even existed. doomed by the narrative that was chosen for you at birth.

#cool writing idea #but also how i feel about white guilt as an Asian person #not batfam

[theogygiaisland]

it's nice being friends with fandom creators like, wow, look at this! and they go 'oh you can play in it too!' and now you're 157 word documents in and balls deep playing with their aus

[theogygiaisland]

you cant fucking hurt me bitch im protected by the migratory bird act

#batfam #robins #batman

[theogygiaisland]

Honestly I think it’s so funny that in the Marvel universe, when someone’s really smart, they have like eight to twelve doctorates and they finished high school at age twelve.

And then over in the DC universe it’s like. This is Tim Drake. He’s a genius. He keeps cloning his loved ones. He dropped out of highschool. Over there is Barry Allen. He can reverse engineer a spaceship in less than a minute. He is such a good chemist he’s still going to be known as the best chemist in 4,000 years. He has a bachelor’s degree.

#choked on my spit #tim drake #barry allen

[theogygiaisland]

Peeling potatoes

#alfred pennyworth #SOFTBATS #Batman

[theogygiaisland]

Dick, after sending a youtube video of how to craft an ax mount: Male urge to build an axe Steph: No, that’s the gifted child urge to make something to brag about and have your parents be proud of you for once Dick: Cant u just say "cool video Dick thumbs up emoji" Steph: "cool video Dick thumbs up emoji" Dick: ... Dick: Atta girl

Thoughts that have BatKid™ energy

Tim: I want to have tea, but I don't want it bland or sweet. I want is savory and salty.

Tim:

Tim [having an epiphany]: It's soup. I want soup.

#dom and i are at it again #aka seasonal spicy humor #aka depression #batfam #dick grayson #batman #stephanie brown #nightwing #spoiler

[theogygiaisland]

Tim: i think we're missing something

Dick: teamwork?

Stephanie: cohesion?

Jason: a general sense of what we're doing?

[theogygiaisland]

Bruce, getting involved in the wrapping paper sword fight:

Jason, stretching: Damian, pass me the sparkly one, Imma bout to make us orphans again

#GUESS WHAT TIME OF THE YEAR IT IS AGAIN FOLKS #Batfam

[theogygiaisland]

[at Jason's funeral]

Dick: *places his hand on the headstone and sobs*

Dick: How could you do this to me? We are so understaffed.

#dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood #robin #batfamily #batfam #batbros #batkids

[theogygiaisland]

The somewhat common trend in the DC comics “Justice League from another universe” trope is that Batman almost always gets along with himself which is so funny to me for some reason. Bruce is secretly thrilled to have another person checking over his work and sniping at him. He thrives on sarcasm and not sleeping, things that seem to be constant across all the dimensions.

Clark saves the world from the evil JL and returns to find Bruce and other!Bruce just hunched over the computer in the Cave trying to talk out a case and it’s actually working.

#im alive #so #bruce wayne #batman #JLA

[theogygiaisland]

👞x 🐦x 4

(extra)

[theogygiaisland]

I gotta draw Tim.

#birb draws things #i consume #tim drake

[theogygiaisland]

What if everyone in Gotham knows who Batman is? They all know, they just don’t say anything. It’s not something that is spoken of or acknowledged in any way, other than the occasional glance or shared look of understanding. But they all know. Except for Brucie Wayne. Lord bless their himbo sunshine child, but he seems to be the only person in Gotham that doesn’t know who Batman is. He must be protected at all costs.

Everyone in Gotham knows who Batman is. (They’re wrong)

#coming back from the dead to say #bruce wayne #the himbo #i love him