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I will always despise people who believe they are entitled to everything based on a position.

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I have cried more tears in this time period of my life than I have in my entire life. I can’t wait to get out. 

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Parks and Recreation Merchandise: http://bit.ly/1nsXYqC

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Yes. My boss is motivating me. Motivating me to never be like her.

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James: I have a feeling we should kiss. Is that a good feeling or an incorrect feeling?

Lily: Well… sometimes I have the feeling I can do crystal meth, but then I think, mmm… better not.

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My First Day

My first day of adult life was interesting.... I woke up, looked flawless, attempted to drive to work, got lost, ended up behind the state prison, looked up directions and made it to work three minutes before I needed to be there. I walked up the steps to the building I worked in with a smile on my face and ready to be awesome. That feeling slowly died throughout the day. My first day involved sharing a hotel room with my middle age boss. My.First.Day. I did that without even knowing the woman for 24 hours. 

Let me tell you that if your boss ever says “We will share a hotel room and it will be fun!” Run far away or pay the money to have your own room and privacy.

I am a deep sleeper. When I say deep sleeper I mean there could be a tornado come and wipe out everything and I wouldn’t even become conscious. I have slept in a small room with both of my parents who snore. Sharing a hotel room with my boss should be a piece of cake.

It wasn’t.

After going through all the basic questions to get to know each other and to make small talk I was out of topics to talk about and I was exhausted from the entire day. I was ready to go to bed. When my boss thought it was time to go to bed and it was nice and dark and quite and I was about to fall asleep I heard...

The sound of a fog horn in an empty bay and it was like the person in charge of the fog horn was just making noise for the hell of it.

My boss snored like that the entire night.

This is why adult life sucks.

#dontgrowupkids

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Parks and Recreation Merchandise: http://bit.ly/1nsXYqC

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What I do

Pretty much what I do in my job is I promote tourism into the lovely area of Southeast Nebraska and also organize specials events. If anyone is reading this and decides to come for a visit contact me. I’ll make sure you enjoy your visit. Alright now that is done....

#tourism #visitnebraska

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I had to kill a spider today. It didn’t take not one tissue, but 5 tissues. When I squeezed the tissue to make sure it was dead I heard a sickening crack. If anyone needs me I’ll be in the fetal position in the shower.

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Good Enough

I liked your girlfriend's status saying happy birthday to you on facebook. I call that good enough for a happy birthday. I'm really lazy and I also hate you.

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people knowing that i’ve cried and people seeing me cry are two different things like i don’t care if people know i’ve cried because like everybody cries but when it comes to people actually being there and seeing me cry in the moment??? no. nope. nah. no thanks. i’m good. no thank you. let’s not

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this was the cutest thing and also literally how i handle anyone being mad at me

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Your dash has been signed by Benedict Cumberbatch