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At twenty three on the verge of spontaneous combustion. Woe-is-me.  But I guess that it comes with the territory.  An ominous landscape of never-ending calamity. (x)

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Sam Winchester Appreciation Week | Day 4: Sam's friends and family - Sam & Rowena

I chose Sam and Rowena because I adore their complicated friendship. Watching their relationship develop was one of the highlights of late seasons for me.

#sam and rowena #favorite dynamics

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9x11 First Born

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9x11 First Born

#going from 'the boy with the demon blood' and 'abomination' #to 'nothing is worth losing you'

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In Romanian lore, Zanna are creatures who guide and protect lost children. Zanna intentionally appear as figments of a child’s imagination.

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obsessed with how sam stares straight ahead glaring, jaw clenched, while dean tries to persuade him that jessica's death wasn't his fault. but as soon as dean tells sam to blame him,

sam looks up with the softest, gentlest expression on his face. like whole demeanor changes in a split second, just because dean has the audacity to suggest that he might share some blame in her death. like what.

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Sam Winchester Appreciation Week 2024 → Day Two: Favourite Sam Arc / Pre or Post Canon / Home / Liminality

My art tag

Ask me a question/say hi/make a request

#sam art #other people's art #gorgeous!

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you know what day it is bitch!!!

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#this is why the rebar is my second favorite character

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apparently we’re having a sad about sam party

i just want everyone to think long and hard about the fact that, as of the end of season 8, sam winchester is thirty years old. and while that may be old in terms of a hunter’s life expectancy, it’s so incredibly young in the real world.

and he was dying. he could feel himself wasting away, he could feel his body destroying itself from the inside out, he wasn’t sleeping, and he was miserable for every single one of his waking hours. and he didn’t care. he thought that dying was worth it, that the pain was worth it, because he was finally being cleansed of something that had never been his fault. 

and just a reminder: his body was thirty years old, but his soul was much, much older than that.

depending on how you do the math, sam spent either 180 or over 23,000 years in hell.* he was tortured and probably raped. and he doesn’t feel like the hellfire burned the sin away from him. in fact, it’s truly remarkable after all that time that hell didn’t turn him into a demon. it couldn’t. his soul was too pure.

and yet there he was, welcoming death for the seventh time, because he thought it would give him absolution.

janna out.

bye.

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Stackednatural- 280/327

The Future (12x19) April 27th, 2017

#manbaby temper tantrum hours #the most unrealistic part of SPN is anyone actually giving a shit about what dean thinks of them

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Just seeing gifs of Dean with Miracle makes me grind my teeth to the bone.

Anyway, time for a dash cleanse

Bones! The only dog I acknowledge.

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s09e09, “Holy Terror” | s15e16, “Drag Me Away (From You)”

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one day i will find my post about it but the final seasons for sam and dean are so about them becoming their parents in every awful way. dean becoming the possessive paranoid man blinded by his own fear and anger who priorities an idealized version of the people he loves over the real people standing in front of him and sam fading into less of a person and more of a symbol.

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Sometimes I think about how Mary made the deal with Azazel for 10 years’ time, and Sam was 6 months old when it came due and even though I’m still very confused about the whole special child thing when Sam was the true vessel and how exactly Azazel knew the people he made deals with would be having kids by the time the deal was due (since John says in s1 things happened when the kids were exactly 6 months, so unless Azazel gave varying lengths for each deal, he knew these people would have kids who would be 6 months old in 10 years), I cannot stop thinking about Sam was traded to Azazel before he was even conceived. It’s not just Azazel feeding him blood at 6 months, it’s not even that this deal was made before Sam was born, it’s that this was set in stone before Sam’s conception happened. I just keep thinking about that, Mary at 19 making her deal with Azazel and not knowing, but then she comes across the demon standing over her child 10 years later and she must have been horrified when she realized that her deal at 19 was about her child, she’d made a deal for John’s life but the price turned out to be her son rather than something about Mary specifically (since her death is framed as if it’s because she walked in at the wrong moment so had she not come across Azazel that night, she might not have been killed; meaning, her death wasn’t the price, it was always Sam). But uh, I just can’t stop thinking about Sam having to stop and consider that he was considered to be Hell’s before Sam actually existed, his body has quite literally never been his and his alone: Azazel planned to feed him blood 10 years before his birth and then Lucifer comes along and makes it clear Lucifer feels that Sam is his, and then we also get Dean doing things like stuffing a mangled soul in Sam when everyone is telling Dean this could easily kill Sam or tricking Sam into allowing an angel to possess him when Dean was there for Lucifer and the fallout but that’s another piece of the puzzle that’s not about Azazel’s deal

it is ALL about. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 <3

Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

except with sam winchester good faithful christian boy for god read literal satan. and that's so special to me. literally before his atoms were even put together he was lucifer's and his only out is to be dean's instead. we love a man who can't win.

no and it actually is so--like no it's just silly on a worldbuilding level sure. lucifer goes to enormous & unecessary effort to secure sam because they scrap a huge plot line before our eyes and salvage it for parts. nothing azazel does matters because sam and dean were always vessels and michael doesn't do shit about it, and even the extremely tenuous demon blood connection falls apart later, so whatever. but thematically it does sing. sam is not just spoken for before conception he's bought and sold. he's john's or he's azazel's or he's dean's or he's lucifer's. shouldn't becky have asked dean's permission. the only way dean even in his wildest monster-induced fantasies can conceive of letting up his grip on sam is if someone else takes over. you don't have to worry about sam anymore, jess tells him.