there's a story.
it's a sad one, this.
it starts - well, it's hard to say when it starts. maybe it started way before music was even a thing. maybe it started before time itself. maybe it doesn't have a start: suddenly everything just fell into place when those two teenagers sat in front of each other with guitars on their laps and played music for the first time. but, on record, one can say it really starts to be told out loud in the middle, towards the end. that's when it starts to truly be spoken of, sang of, wide open, undeniable. almost a cry for attention, for communication, "look, now i'm going to sing about this", because when everything else fails, they had music - they have always had music.
so it starts right before the big plot twist, before the season finale, before the breakup. or it starts right after that. nobody truly knows, really. real life stories are not divided in seasons, and this one is real. very, very real, very human. either way, this story starts to be told with two of us. it starts towards the end, but cries for the beginning, for the very beginning.
We're on our way home
We're going home
You and I have memories
That stretches out ahead
and then, it goes on, it goes on to plead, to beg, scream, to desperately reach:
Oh! Darling, if you leave me
I'll never make it alone
Believe me when I beg you
Don't ever leave me alone
the story sees confusion, it sees defeat, it sees someone who wants. someone who is trying, but failing because they don't know the way. someone who needs, who desperately needs, but doesn't know how to ask. they were on their way back home, but now, they've lost the way, they can't find the road. or, rather, the road is there, but it's all foggy. where's home? but they're trying. the many ways i've tried.
The wild and windy night
That the rain washed away
Has left a pool of tears
Crying for the day
Why leave me standing here?
Let me know the way
it sees heartbreak.
I don't believe in Beatles
I just believe in me
Yoko and me
And that's reality
The dream is over
What can I say?
it sees anger,
That was your first mistake
You took your lucky break and broke it in two.
Now what can be done for you?
You broke it in two.
A pretty face may last a year or two
But pretty soon they'll see what you can do
The sound you make is muzak to my ears
You must have learned something all those years
and desperation, always desperation, a need to know, please tell me why-
Well, I wake up in the morning, I'm still dreaming 'bout you
Tell you, pretty baby, I'm blue
Wake up in the evening, I'm still screaming out
Over you, over you
Well, tell me why, why, why do you treat me so bad, so bad
When you're the best friend a man ever had?
and questions, a perpetual need to know, followed by a perpetual failure to ask-
Dear friend, throw the wine
I'm in love with a friend of mine
Really truly, young and newly wed
Are you afraid, or are you blue?
and apologies - because they were just lost. lost. and frightened. why? because i was afraid of losing you. am i afraid? yes, i am. are you blue? yes. yes i am.
I was feeling insecure
You might not love me anymore
I was shivering inside
I was shivering inside
Oh, I didn't mean to hurt you
I'm sorry that I made you cry
Oh no, I didn't want to hurt you
I'm just a jealous guy
and the story, after all of that, sees understanding. it's because i couldn't speak, and neither could you. but i know now. and it's getting better all the time.
And I know and I'm sorry (yes I am)
But I never could speak my mind
[...]
And I know and I'm guilty (yes I am)
But I never could read your mind
I know what I was missing
But now my eyes can see
I put myself in your place
As you did for me
Today, I love you more than yesterday
Right now, I love you more right now
and, after so long, it sees the spring coming after a long winter. a friend that will never fade away, a love that will never disappear.
You want a friend you can rely on
One who will never fade away
And if you're searching for an answer
Stick around, I say
It's coming up, it's coming up
It's coming up, like a flower
and finally, it goes back to where it first started when they sang it aloud, open and clear, in two of us: there's pleading for the start, for the past, we have memories longer than the road that stretches out ahead, let's go back to that road, let's walk it again, let's escape, you and me. we've been through it all, we've been apart for far too long, it's okay now, we're okay now, i miss you, let's get it together, let's walk that road again like we used to. let's get back home. because when i see you, it's like we both are falling in love again.
It's time to spread our wings and fly
Don't let another day go by my love
It'll be just like starting over
Startin' over
Why don't we take off alone
Take a trip somewhere far, far away
We'll be together all alone again
Like we used to in the early days
and then there's a bright future ahead. there is. hapiness and promises. for love, for acceptance, for family. i'm okay now, i can handle this, i want to see my kid growing up. and we can start over. it is coming up, like a flower. it's getting better all the time.
Before you go to sleep
Say a little prayer
Every day in every way
It's getting better and better
and there's: i want to spend the rest of my life with you. whatever happens. i want to look you in the eye when we're eighty and make sure you know i love you just as much.
Grow old along with me
Whatever fate decrees
We will see it through
For our love is true
and then. well.
then the story sees tragedy. unexplicable, cruel, devastating tragedy. unjustifiable loss. it sees, for the first time, not music but silence for a while, silence.
just silence and hidden-away, chest-aching sobs.
and then it sees music again. this time to mourn. it's not two of us, it's the one who remains. the one who wishes the other was here. always, always reaching for the start.
But as for me
I still remember how it was before
And I am holding back the tears no more
I love you
now, music is still desperate, still trying to reach. but, now, it will never be able to get to the other side. or is it?
in real life, we don't have happy endings all the time. most of the time we don't. we're left with what ifs. what if. what if i had been braver. what if i was born a girl. what if. what if. could we have been together? could i have saved you?
What opportunities did we allow to flow by
Feeling like like the timing wasn't quite right?
What kind of magic might have worked if we had stayed calm,
Couldn't I have given you a better life?
it's a story of what if. what if whatever fate decrees had been different? was it fate who decreed it? could i have given you a better life? because you deserved a better life. you did.
and it keeps coming back to it: the past, the desire to still be on that road going back home. going back home. we'll be together all alone again like we used to in the early days / i live through those early days
And they can't take it from me, if they try
I live through those early days
So many times I had to change the pain to laughter
Just to keep from getting crazy
and then, and then, the story sees magic, sees love, as it has always done. so much love. it keeps seeing love. after sorrow, after darkness, love. even though fate was mean, even though it's sad: the love is still here. the love never left. a love so true it endures. it endures in song and it endures in the way paul keeps talking about john to this day, reafirming it, making sure people know. whatever fate decrees, our love is true. will forever be.
there's a story.
it's one that is so real. so painstakingly human. as beautiful as it is sad. it's all there, in the music, in the silence, in the words and in the what ifs. music speaks when they don't. music reaches. it reaches. it has always done so. always for them. they changed the world just with how much their music reached each other. and you’re in my song.
And if I say
I really loved you
And was glad you came along
Then you were here today
For you were in my song
there's a story, the story of a love so strong it changed the world.
it's like you and me are lovers.
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