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blueleatherbag · 2 days
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“They’ll be others…”
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Both @mary-fantg & dearest @tommygrace have mentioned this scene at the end of Season 1’s finale. It’s such a rare moment of emotion of Tommy in front of his family. He seems like any other young man here, heartbroken and lovesick…
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He is bent and bowed by what he has lost: At the beginning of the day, he was looking ahead to a future with Grace; was not one man but part of a couple, part of a happy future he never thought he'd have.
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It's bigger than Grace "betraying" him - Tommy has been betrayed before by loved ones. He could forgive her for that — once again, he's forgiven loved ones before. It's the fact that Tommy, for the first time in a long time, allowed himself to be vulnerable, to be intimate. To dare to dream there was more to life than his gangster ways. Grace told him she loved him. But suddenly, none of that seems like enough. The fact that even Grace was ensnared in the dark goings-on in Small Heath must've made him feel like nothing was sacred anymore, that nothing good in his life is impervious to being corrupted...
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The fact that two years later, he still unable to lift his head when thinking of Grace says so much.
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The loss is still so fresh & weighs upon him so heavy. The loss of life could've been. And it's not that he doesn't trust women...it's that he doesn't trust himself. To love again. To trust again.
To dream of happiness again.
For Tommy, it would be easiest to forget it all ever happened. But even if he can't do that. He could never erase Grace from his mind or heart...
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As soon as he says this out-loud, the wheels are in motion for their reunion. They cannot be stopped. They both know it.
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Gifs @timothechallamet @nat111love @thomasshelbyltd @normalgirlism
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blueleatherbag · 6 days
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take my breathe away at like 2am in the morning 😭
back in my Tumblr era!!! because of this man 😩
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good god
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blueleatherbag · 8 days
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I've been reading your works lately. This is my first to comment. This is just amazing, and that TOMMY cameo ohmygod 🥵 i had to re-read that part again and again. I always love your writing. And yes, that gif, tho! i thoughts that i had to.
Congrats on 6K, Liv 🎉🎉 Could I pls request a GIF blurb with this amazing inspo?
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This gif just melts me! I'm sorry, but I only had naughty thoughts for this.
The Scarf
Pairing- Cillian Murphy and Reader
Warnings- Mature Content, sexual language and roleplay. It's fiction!
It had been a long day for you both. Cillian had been working on a photoshoot, for Versace. You had accompanied him to the shoot, so you could spend the day together. You were also an actress, and had planned your schedule so you could have some time off.
Cillian had been working solidly for months. Between promoting Oppenheimer, and attending various award shows. It felt like you had barely seen each other. But now, was your time. You didn't mind attending days like this with him. And loved watching him pose, for the photographs. Even if it wasn't his favourite part of the job.
You thought he was a natural. Watching him chat with Donatella Versace, you couldn't help smile with pride.
For the last shot of the day, Cillian had been dressed in a black suit, and white vest. His gold necklace you had gifted him, on full display. Matching his gold wedding ring. Which he had refused to take off for the shoot.
He hated not wearing it, for a character. And he was being himself today. You secretly loved the fact, he kept his ring on. It was a symbol of love, a symbol to mark he was your man.
Watching him parade around the studio, you had to squeeze your thighs together. That damn scarf, was getting you hot and bothered. All you could think of was biting down on it, while he fucked you hard.
Taking a sip of your water bottle, you attempted to cool down. Deciding to distract yourself, you moved over to the monitor to look at the camera photos. Feeling Cillian rest his arm around your shoulders.
“All done, babe,” he stated, nuzzling into your neck. His skin brushing against yours.
Not afraid to show affection, in front of the crew. “The photos look amazing, I’m going to be the envy of every woman in the world,” you teased, watching him blush.
“Ah stop, let’s go home,” he winked, taking your hand.
Exiting your en-suite later that night, you giggled to yourself. Cillian was sitting up in bed reading, bare chest on display. Looking over to you, he frowned.
“What’s funny?” He queried, putting his book on his lap.
“Oh nothing,” you giggled, pumping some hand cream into your palm.
“Babe. It’s only funny if you share the joke, ya know?” He informed you, awaiting your response. Reading abandoned, you had now sparked his interest.
Sighing, you bit your lip rubbing your hands together. Rubbing the remainder of the cream, along your forearms.
“I guess…” you began, “I’m just…”
“Just?” Your husband asked, eager for you to share the joke.
“In a naughty mood,” you confessed, going back into the bathroom. Actually beginning to feel unsure, about what you had done.
“A naughty mood?” He repeated, climbing from the bed. “Good naughty? Or?” Leaning across the doorframe, he raised his eyebrow.
“Shall I show you?” You giggled again, pushing him back towards the bed. Cillian now getting excited, over what was to come. As he lay back, you climbed on top. Straddling his hips.
“I have a present for you,” you grinned, briefly leaning down to kiss him.
“Ah yeah?” He asked, “Show me,” Lifting his hands, you ran them across your body. From your neck, to your breasts, over your stomach, along your thighs.
"You have to find it," you smirked, raising your eyebrow in a wiggle. "It's on me... somewhere..."
Lifting the hem of your silk nightie, he swiftly lifted it from your head. Revealing your naked breasts, leaving you in just a lace thong. Nipples instantly standing to attention, with the cold air.
"Hmm, you haven't got much on my love," he chuckled.
Sitting up to pull you flush against his chest. Your breasts grazing across his own nipples. Wriggling your ass, you took his bottom lip between your teeth. Just gently nibbling....
"I have one thing left, Cill," you informed him, taking his hand to the front of your panties. "Inside here,"
You could already feel his erection growing, brushing against your leg.
"Mmm, I like this little game," he smiled, licking his lips. Hooking his forefinger into the front of your panties, Cillian gasped.
"You naughty girl,"
Pushing you onto your back, he hovered over you. "That's me, I've been a bad, bad, girl," you confessed with a little moan.
There it was... the scarf from the photoshoot. The same scarf, that cost hundreds of pounds. And was meant to be used, just for the photoshoot.
It was not your property, not his property.
Pulling the scarf from inside of your panties, he dragged your panties along your leg. "You have, haven't you?" he growled, voice deep rumbling against your cheek. His lips landing on your neck.
"What do you think you need?"
Holding the scarf above your midriff, he dragged it along your skin. Gently letting it roam, over your hardened nipples. Earning the response he wanted, another moan leaving your mouth.
"I need to be punished, I'm such a bad girl," you groaned, arching your back, as he rubbed the scarf against your pussy.
Already pulsing with desire.
"Turn over," he warned you, smacking your ass as you did.
"Yes Sir, anything you say," you cooed, wiggling your ass in the air for him.
"You fucking know it," he growled in his Tommy Shelby voice, smacking your ass again. Knowing the effect, his character's voice had on you. Scrunching the scarf up, he leant over you, his weight pushing you into the bed.
"More," you whined. Even the friction of your nipples, against the sheets was sending you spiralling. Another smack on your ass, had you begging for more.
"Open that dirty mouth and spread your legs," Cillian ordered you, again using his Tommy voice.
"Yes Sir, thank you, Sir," you answered, quickly obeying him.
Letting him push the scarf into your mouth, able to taste your own juices. Pumping his hard cock in his hand, Cillian watched you wriggling beneath him.
"You stay still now, you think you can take it?" he asked, desperate to slam into you.
"Hmm, hmm," you mumbled eagerly.
His fingers digging into your thighs as he spread your moist, pink lips apart. Before slamming fully into you, in one movement. His cock disappearing, inside of your saturated hole. Instantly you squirted on him.
Your moaning and calling out his name, muffled from the scarf. This was what you had wanted all day. Pulling out, Cillian pushed back inside of you, hitting your g-spot.
“Could cum in you already, this is how fucking wound up you got me, baby girl,"
Pulling the scarf out, you looked back up at him. "Fill me up, give me every last drop of the cum," you begged, moaning louder. His balls slapping against your ass cheeks.
"Jesus fucking Christ," he groaned, grabbing your hips.
Pounding and pounding, his heart racing fast. Hair sticking to his head. "Here it comes," He stiffened spilling his seed into you, collapsing on top of you.
“It’s going to drip out of you,”
Both out of breath, Cillian unwillingly pulled out of you. He watched his creamy seed, dripping along your thighs. Reaching for the scarf, he handed it to you. Pressing a gentle kiss to your lips.
"Now clean yourself up, I want to see," he winked, watching you follow his order...Just like you always did.
Tagging- @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @being-worthy @janelongxox @thenattitude @katsav17 @answer-the-sirens @kathrinemelissa @queenshelby @geminiwolves @lyarr24 @ysmmsy @margoo0 @mysticaldeanvoidhorse @dolllol2405 @misselsbells06 @cheekybluefox @alreadybroken-ts @look-at-the-soul @lespendy @cillmequick @raychhh @captivatedbycillianmurphy @castellandiangelo @blondie-22 @midnightmagpiemama @elenavampire21 @camilleholland89 @cljordan-imperium @peakyscillian @muhahaha303 @already-broken144 @pono-pura-vida @cillshot @ietss @powerlvr25 @kmc1989 @nadloves @amberpanda99 @bernelflo @trixie23 @cilloak @laylasbunbunny @lau219 @surfin-the-sun @fiokw @in0320 @brummiereader @girlwith-thepearlearring @neonpurplestars89-blog @ladyvenera
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blueleatherbag · 1 year
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Felip ‘Bulan’
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blueleatherbag · 1 year
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Josh Cullen ✨
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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Slytherin Common Room
I’m bored and if you wish to entertain me with your questions or anything silly, they better be good.
Make sure you end your asks with a colored emoji depending on your house.
-D.M.
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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Loki, prince of Asgard, God of Manners
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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TOM HIDDLESTON and SOPHIA DI MARTINO Studios Assembled - Loki Series (2021)
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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An emotional Tom Hiddleston wraps series one of Marvel Studios’ Loki (2021)
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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Loki + dnd spells/cantrips & schools of magic
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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I remember Owen asking me what I loved about playing Loki. Like, never mind what was great about the character, what other people could see.
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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#cuteness overload
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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No thoughts, head empty, just the look of childlike wonderment on Loki’s face when he realizes he can whack Miss Minutes with a magazine😊✨
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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RED || TAYLOR SWIFT
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Red album theme. Need I say more? Expect a rollercoaster of emotions. I'm switching it up a bit by writing for the boys I love but never written for.
Preferences || Main || Red Taglist
LINE-UP UNDER THE CUT. SEE UR FAVES.
1. state of grace - steve harrington 2. red - chris evans 3. treacherous - chris evans 4. i knew you were trouble - billy hargrove 5. all too well - steve harrington 6. 22 - timmy chalamet 7. i almost do - timmy chalamet 8. we are never ever getting back together - steve harrington 9. stay stay stay - steve harrington 10. the last time - timmy chalamet 11. holy ground - billy hargrove 12. sad beautiful tragic - timmy chalamet 13. the lucky one - chris evans 14. everything has changed - chris evans 15. starlight - billy hargrove 16. begin again - billy hargrove 17. the moment i knew - MYSTERY BOY 18. come back... be here - MYSTERY BOY 19. girl at home - MYSTERY BOY
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big thanks to my friend, frances, for my new dividers.
𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓:
𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @holland-styles @trustfundparker @alinastarkrovs @celestialholland @hufflepuffprincess24 @tommysparker @justasmisunderstoodasloki @quaksonhehe @call-me-baby-gir1 @itstaskeen @theonly1outof-a-billion @lost-in-the-stars03 @justafangirlduh @piscesparker @speedymaximoff @miraclesoflove @lexirv @blairscott @getbywithasmile @pqrkerr @lavender-writer @blackbat2020 @hoodpankow @bi-lmg @emmastarz @moonchild-s-blog @itszulli @blossomholland @prancerrparkerr
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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LAGOT KAYO KAY NANNO HAHAHAHAHAAH CHAR
Student Council Elections (Profiles) - All
Preferences || Main || Taglist
Requested? Nah. Soc Med AU Summary: You and Zendaya are leaving your roles as class president and class vice president to run for student council elections aka the bigger roles. Will both of you win?
Chapters so far: Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3
Arranged alphabetically.
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from Thailand
new student
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your friend
i didnt want to put a face claim on them bc they're ur friend
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i didnt want to put a face claim either bc everyone is different and i dont want to like use someone's picture as yourself so yeah
feel free to edit your picture in it HAHAHAHAHA
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𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐄𝐎𝐏𝐋𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐎𝐌, 𝐇𝐀𝐙, 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐘, 𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐑, 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐀𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐒: @blueleatherbag @cocoamoonmalfoy @thatforgottenangel @parkerpeter24 @turtoix @slutforsr @givebuckyhisplumsnow @runawayolives @hollandsrecs @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @yourstrulyamour @juliediggory @rumplebutterbaby @dummiesshort @thevelvetseries @buckymylove @moonlight-onyx @bora-world @supred12 @more-like-reyna @caitsymichelle13 @aayaissaa @wannabemobwife @sunwardsss @bigassnocash @repostcentral
𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @holland-styles @trustfundparker @alinastarkrovs @celestialholland @hufflepuffprincess24 @tommysparker @justasmisunderstoodasloki @quaksonhehe @call-me-baby-gir1 @itstaskeen @theonly1outof-a-billion @lost-in-the-stars03 @justafangirlduh @piscesparker @speedymaximoff @miraclesoflove @lexirv @blairscott @getbywithasmile @pqrkerr @lavender-writer @blackbat2020 @hoodpankow @bi-lmg @emmastarz @moonchild-s-blog @itszulli
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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🤍😂😭🥺 ME RIGHT NOW. FUN HELPING U WITH THIS
hope ur ok || holland!reader
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sour masterlist || holland!reader || sour taglist
3,637 words tw: sad shit bc spoiler: someone dies, italics are flashbacks, bold is a letter i don't have a holland reader banner so i used the olivia banner instead. also, sorry for the delay of posting this lmao
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You were in your room, sitting on your bed as your eyes looked around. Your room was painted your favorite color and it made your brothers jealous because their rooms were painted white, it was boring. Yours had posters, polaroids of you and your siblings, fairy lights, a bean bag chair, and a simple full body mirror. You heard a knock on your door and you looked to see that it was Tom smiling brightly with a plate of your favorite cookies.
“Hey.” He said softly as he entered the room and shut the door behind him with his foot while balancing the plate of cookies in his hands.
“Hi.” You smiled.
“Sam kicked me out of the kitchen, but I was there first and fortunately, I finished the cookies on time. I hope they taste alright.” Tom said as he sat beside you, the plate of cookies in between you.
“They smell good, so you did a good job.” You chuckled. Tom took one cookie and looked at you, “Taste test.”
He took a bite and chewed it a few times before saying, “It tastes alright. It’s not like how Sam makes it, but I’m not Sam. I’m Tom.”
Both of you erupted into a fit of giggles as you talked about random things. The plate of cookies were now on your bedside table and only half of the cookies were eaten.
“Hey, how’s your friend?” Tom asked casually. Both of you were laying on your bed, facing the ceiling.
“Which friend?”
“The blond one who had one hell of a musical talent.” Tom said. “He used to come here and play on Sam’s piano.”
“Oh, James! I don’t really know what happened to him. We, uh, fell out of touch.”
“I see.” Tom said. “I hope he’s okay.”
“Same here.” You told him. “My friend, Madeline, got a scholarship last time I checked. She got accelerated in school and she got to attend uni ahead of us. I’m really proud of her, y’know?”
“Where is she now?” Tom asked.
You looked at Tom with sorrow in your eyes. He glanced at you and he could see how hurt you were. “We don’t talk...anymore. We used to. She’s basically like a sister to me, but we don’t talk anymore. Regardless, I’m really happy for her and I miss her. Wherever she is, I hope she’s alright.”
Suddenly, there was a knock on your door and Tom sat up quickly. The door opened and revealed Sam. “Hey, it’s time to eat dinner. You’re washing the dishes tonight, Tom!” Sam said before leaving.
“That little shit.” Tom laughed. “C’mon, Y/N. Let’s eat!” He got up from your bed and you followed suit with worry and concern in your eyes. You shook your head and shrugged it off. What you’ll say can wait.
Both of you went down to join everyone on the dining table. You sat in your usual seat, but didn’t contribute in the conversation. You were just happy to be there. You looked around and saw how happy your brothers were. You looked at your parents and saw them smiling. It was a beautiful sight to see. After all, all you wanted was for them to be happy. They deserve to be happy.
Harry and Tom cleaned up as you watched them help each other. “Next time, we should cook Y/N’s favorite dinner.” Tom said. Harry looked at him and shrugged, “Why not? I never liked it, but I’m sure she’d appreciate it very much.”
The next few days were spent with Tom. He never left your side and he made sure you were alright. You were the youngest and as the eldest Holland child, he made it his job to look after you. He wasn’t close with you before, but somehow as you grew older, it changed. Tom was now excited to spend time with you. He loved talking to you and he loved laughing with you. In his opinion, you make his stress and worries fade away.
Your birthday is coming up and he wanted everything planned out. He already had plans, actually. He knew what cake you wanted, he knew what decorations to put up, he planned the food, and he even had a theme in mind. He was really prepared. Paddy had to go with Tom in town just to buy balloons. Tom was really going all out.
“Are you going to help me set up tonight? Y/N’s birthday is tomorrow and I want her to be surprised when she wakes up. I can already imagine her face.” Tom smiled excitedly as he parked the car in the driveway.
“I can’t help you tonight. I have homework.” Paddy said as he looked at Tom who just shrugged. “Alright. No problem. Stay in school, Pads.” Tom smiled before exiting his car with Paddy following him.
They walked in and Tom saw you sitting on the arm of the couch with Sam and Harry. Tom smiled at the sight. “Hey, guys!” He greeted, causing the three of you to look at Tom and Paddy.
“Wow, you went shopping for a lot of things.” Harry pointed out.
“Yeah, what’s up with that?” Sam asked with a grin.
“Nothing.” Tom smirked. “I’ll put these in my room.” Tom left and went upstairs to his room as Paddy walked to the couch and sat next to you. You looked at Paddy and smiled. You weren’t close with him, but you loved him dearly. You were only one year younger than him and he was always kind to you and you liked hanging out with him.
You looked at Sam and Harry and you held back a chuckle as you watch them annoy each other. It was a lovely sight to see.
Night time came and dinner was over a few hours ago. You were just standing in your backyard feeling the wind blowing and you knew that something was about to happen. You just didn’t know what. The backdoor opened and you turned around to see Tom with a small smile.
“What’re you doing out here? It’s cold.” He said as he tugged his jacket closer. He walked towards you and stood beside you. “What’s on your mind?”
You shrugged, “Nothing. I guess I’m just tired. I think I’ll rest now.”
Tom nodded. He suddenly remembered his plan and said, “Yeah, you can go upstairs now. I, uh, prepared your room.”
“Thank you.” You smiled at him. You walked towards the back door and stopped to turn around to look at Tom. He was already looking at you and you said, “I- Good night, Tom.”
“Good night, Y/N. Sweet dreams.” He smiled sweetly. You opened the door and walked in and went straight up the stairs to your room.
Tom stayed outside for a minute before walking in. He locked the back door and went to the living room where his brothers were. “Hey, guys! Ready to decorate?” Tom asked with a huge smile on his face. It was evident that he was excited.
“What’re you talking about?” Sam asked, looking at Tom with a confused face.
“Yeah, what’s happening?” Paddy questioned.
Tom scoffed and crossed his arms, “How could you guys forget?! It’s our sister’s birthday tomorrow and you guys aren’t preparing at all!”
Tom was yelling as the rest were looking at him sadly. Sam’s eyes were clouded with tears as he looked at Tom. Harry and Paddy looked at Sam, not wanting to be the ones to remind Tom. Sam sighed and closed his eyes and his tears fell. He wiped his tears and opened his eyes to face Tom.
“Tom, mate, she’s dead.” Sam said softly. “She’s been dead for two months now.”
“W-What are you talking about?” Tom shook his head slowly. He looked away from Sam and he saw you standing behind Sam. “She’s right there, Sam! She’s literally right behind you! How can you not see it?!”
“Tom, stop! She’s gone, okay?!” Harry exclaimed. “Y/N’s not here! She won’t be here anymore and it’ll be that way forever. We just have to accept that.”
“It was leukemia, Tom. She didn’t make it and we had a funeral and everything.” Paddy said softly.
You were confined in the hospital for about a week now and you were getting weaker and weaker as the days went on. Your family was trying to be positive, but all of you knew that it was your time to go. Before you were confined, you had written letters for them to read after you die and it was now hidden in their drawers.
Tom and Harry weren’t there when you passed because they were in a different country. They immediately went home when they heard the news. All of you knew that you weren’t going to make it, but all of you ignored that fact. Everyone except Tom was grieving. He held his mother as she cried and he stayed strong for his brothers. He couldn’t remember the last time he and his brothers slept in one room and he hated that they chose to do it again as soon as you were gone.
It was like a sleepover. They all talked about you and everything you did that the others didn’t know about. Turns out, you had secrets you shared with everyone except Tom.
“Wait, she told you guys about her secrets?” Tom asked that night.
“Yeah.” Harry nodded, eyes bloodshot from all the crying. “If something happens to her, she tells the first person she sees.”
“She never told me anything.” Tom stated.
“That’s because you’re the eldest. No one tells people about themselves to the eldest sibling.” Paddy answered.
“That’s unfortunate.” Tom frowned. “I wish I knew the things you knew.” He added.
“It’s alright, Tom. She didn’t have major secrets, anyway. Besides, she was just scared to tell you. That’s why she did that.” Sam explained.
Tom couldn’t sleep that night as he looked at his brothers. They were cuddled up next to each other and were fast asleep. Tom couldn’t help but think of you before finally drifting off. Days later, it was the funeral. The whole house was quiet and while your mum, Nikki, would appreciate it, for once in her life she wanted the noise. She wanted to hear boisterous laughing, heavy footsteps running up and down the stairs, yelling, the sound of Sam cutting vegetables, Dom’s loud typing, Paddy talking to his friend on the phone, Harry telling you to wake up and calling you a lazy bum for not being productive, and Tom playing with Tessa outside. Now, there was none of that.
When a husband or wife dies, the one they left behind is called a widow. When a child dies, what do you call their parents? No one’s ever come up with a word for that yet because it’s too painful to think about. You were young and you deserved all the best life has to offer. Nikki was devastated, but she knew that wherever you were, you aren’t in pain anymore and that was enough for her.
Tom wanted to scream, but he didn’t. He was numb. After the funeral, he and Harry decided to take a break from traveling to spend time with the rest of the family. He stopped working for a while and everyone understood that.
When they got home, Tom went straight to his room and cried. He cried and cried until no tears came out. His head ached, but he didn’t want to get up and get himself a glass of water. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table to ask Harry, but his phone died. Tom scoffed, sat up, and reached the drawer of his bedside table. He leaned over to look for his phone charger, but he saw a letter instead. It had his name on it and he realized that it was your handwriting. Tom quickly grabbed it and put his phone back on the bedside table. He opened the envelope and read what you wrote for him.
Dear Tom,
Hi. When you read this, you know that I'm gone. I'm sorry that we never got to bond a lot. I guess it's my fault because I was so scared of you. Despite that, I want you to know that I'm really happy for you and I'm proud of you.
You're my inspiration and please know that I'm very proud to be your sister.
I don't know where I'll end up when I'm gone, but please don't worry about me. I'll be okay, I can feel it. I'll just go where the wind takes me.
You're a kind person for the whole time I've known you. I'll miss everything and I'll miss your pranks and jokes. Please never stop doing those just because I'm gone. I hope you think of me whenever you tell a joke or pull a prank on Harry again.
I wish we bonded more. I wish we made cookies until Sam kicked us out of the kitchen because he needed to prepare for dinner. I wish we watched movies together and I wish we spoke often.
I'll miss you all the time and I love you. So much. Never forget that.
Your sister,
Y/N/N x
Tom cried again until he slept with the letter resting on his chest. The next morning, he got up to go to your room. He dreamt of you and he wanted to tell you about it. He glanced at the door and noticed that it was unlocked. He slowly opened it and to his surprise, he saw you standing there watching everyone outside from your window.
“Y/N.” Tom said.
You turned around and smiled at him, “Hey, Tom.”
“I dreamt of you! And in my dream, you were a ballet dancer. We did ballet together. Wouldn't that be something? It could be a bonding thing for us." Tom said with a big smile as he fully entered your room. All of a sudden, he forgot about your sickness, your death, your sickness. From an outsider's point of view, it was a sad sight to see. He was clearly in the denial stage.
Harry was on his way downstairs when he heard a voice coming from your room. He quietly opened the door and saw Tom excitedly talking to thin air.
"You know, I'm not doing anything anytime soon. Why don't we go out? It'll just be you and me, Y/N." Tom smiled. Harry's heart broke upon hearing this. His older brother was imagining their dead sister. Harry kept it to himself because he thought that Tom was coping that way.
It wasn't until Sam witnessed the same thing. Tom was in the kitchen and he was talking to thin air once more. Sam watched as Tom laughed and said a bunch of things. Sam kept it to himself too.
Paddy, however, was different. He went to Harry and Sam's room, unannounced. He closed and locked the door behind him as the twins looked at him in confusion.
"Okay, I can't be the only one to notice it." Paddy said with arms crossed.
"What're you talking about?" Harry asked.
"Tom." Was all Paddy said. The twins looked at each other before looking back at Paddy.
"What about him?" Sam asked, his eyebrows were raised a bit.
"Tom told me that he'll bake Y/N's favorite cookies tomorrow because Y/N said she was craving for it." Paddy explained.
"I saw Tom talking to thin air the day after the funeral. He was in Y/N's room." Harry confessed.
"I saw him doing that too, but he was in the kitchen this time. I'm worried about him." Sam said.
"What should we do?" Harry asked with a frown on his face.
"Let's just let him be for a while. Let’s just intervene when it gets out of hand.” Sam decided as the other two nodded.
They just let Tom be until they had enough.
Tom couldn't believe what his brothers were telling him. He felt sick to his stomach. His baby sister was gone and the thought of it ate him alive. He shook his head and Sam said, “Tom, everything will be alright. We’ll get through this together. We’ll be fine.”
“That can’t be true. I’ve been speaking to her. Stop fucking lying.” Tom cried.
“Tom, wake up! She’s not here, alright?! She’s not in her room anymore. Her things will forever be untouched and her books will be dusty. Her phone hasn’t been charged since she died and it’ll stay that way. All we have left are pictures, videos, and memories of her. We should accept that because no matter what happens, we can’t bring her back!” Harry said as his voice was raised.
“Just go to bed, mate. You’re tired.” Paddy said softly. “We’ll deal with this in the morning.”
Tom wiped his tears and went up to his room, slamming the door. He went to sleep and dreamt of you again. Both of you were on top of a small hill and the wind was blowing softly.
“Why can’t they see you?” Tom asked you.
“Because I only showed myself to you. I know that we haven’t been really close and I figured you’d want some kind of closure. In truth, I’m only here because of you. The light has been calling me and they want me to leave already, but I can’t because I know you’d be sad. I hate seeing you sad.” You explained.
“Then stay here.” Tom begged, but you shook your head.
“You need to let me go, Tom. It’s time. I can’t stay here forever.” You chuckled lightly.
“I just- I feel like nothing. When you were around, I felt like I had a purpose. Now, I just wish I could be with you.” He admitted.
“Don’t say that. Imagine how everyone will react if you’re gone. They’ll be upset. I’m so proud that you’re alive and well because you’ll get to go on with life and grow old. If you can’t do it for yourself, then do it for me. Live the life I never got to live. Trust me when I say that you’ll be happier when you move on.”
“I don’t want to forget you and I don’t want you to think that we’re having fun without you.” He said.
“I won’t think that way because all I ever wanted for all of you is to be happy and healthy. I love you and I miss you, but I want you to have fun and to keep doing everything you love. Don’t stop because I’m gone. Don’t let me be a hindrance because that’ll make me sad and I’ll haunt you forever.” You said as Tom chuckled. “Besides, you don’t have to forget about me. I’ll always be in your heart.”
“Alright.” Tom said. “I think I’m ready to let you go.”
You smiled and nodded as you walked away and stepped into the light. Tom shouted, “Happy birthday, Y/N!”
You looked back and smiled. With that, he knew you were thanking him not just for greeting, but also for everything.
Tom woke up and it was already morning. He decided to get ready and to head to the cemetery. He walked downstairs and saw his brothers eating breakfast.
“Where are you going?” Harry asked before eating his cereal.
“The cemetery. It’s Y/N’s birthday.” Tom said. “I’ll go now. I don’t know what time I’ll be back.”
Tom left and the drive to the cemetery was short and quiet. He parked the car and walked to your grave. He smiled when he saw a small, framed picture of you that Harry placed there not too long ago. He sat in front of your grave and smiled, “Hey, Y/N. I know you can hear me.”
“I guess I did look crazy for a while and I now understand how everyone felt. I, um, I read your letter. I’m sorry too, y’know? I’m sorry I never made the effort to spend time with you. I guess it’s because all my life, I’ve only known about having brothers and when you came along, I didn’t know how to act. But I’m really happy that I got to see you grow up and I’m happy with our few moments together.”
“When you were five, I was fourteen. It’s a wide gap and I remember being so annoyed because your toys were everywhere.” He chuckled at the thought. “Regardless, I loved you and I still do. I’m happy that you grew up to be kind and loving. I’m really fucking happy for that.”
“In your letter, you said that I shouldn’t worry about you. Y/N, I’m sorry, but I can’t promise that. I’m your older brother and that automatically makes me sort of like a second parent especially when mum and dad aren’t around. So, I’ll always worry about you even though I know you’re okay and not in pain.”
“I do, however, promise to always dedicate my pranks to you. I know you’d love that. I’d wish that we bonded, but we already did that. You gave me a chance to get to know the sister I never got to know and that, above all, makes me so happy and grateful. That’s enough for me.”
“I don’t want to say cheesy shit and ask for guidance. I don’t want to burden you in heaven. Like, it’s called a resting place for a reason and I want you to rest easy. I just want to say that I miss you so much and I love you. Happy birthday.” He finished.
Just then, he felt the wind blow in his direction and he knew that you were okay.
* * * *
𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @celestialholland @alinastarkrovs @piscesparker @prancerrparkerr @spideyspeaches @givebuckyhisplumsnow @blueleatherbag @theonly1outof-a-billion @hollandbroz-n-haz @starlight-starks @webmeupspiderdaddy @studiesinspanish @bi-lmg @minejungwoo @blossomhollands @markhyucksmells @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch
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blueleatherbag · 3 years
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My friend u did it again. 🤍
Okay your sour series is breaking me in a way that I dont think I can recover. And since the beggining I knew it was supposed to go like that, but I insisted on having my heart broken and I'd do it all again because these are perfect 🥺🥺🥺, but yeah. Just came to let you know that I'll need you to pay me a therapist ((and honestly good 4 u was the worst one because I felt it deep into my heart me being replaced and you made me feel like harry would actually do something like this but yeah they are all amazing 🥲))
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this me rn
this feedback of yours literally made my day! thank you for taking the time to read my sour series and thank you for saying that they're perfect. i really appreciate it 🤍 im also VERY VERY VERY SORRY for hurting your feelings omg sksksjsh words cannot express how sorry i am for making you and other ppl cry bc of my angsty works skskks but thank you so much and i hope you stick around until the end of my sour series 🤍 stay safe xx
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