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he wants me to hate him it would he more convenient for him he isn't happywith me he isn't happy once again ive burdened the only one to care about me

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oh.

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mfs say “i’m fine” then detach themselves from everyone in their lives for weeks. that’s me, i’m mfs

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He’s gonna take her to the grave and there’s nothing I can do about it

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it kind of suks always being the last choice. I sometimes think of a world where i was never born at all . I think everyone would be much happier.

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It's written all over me ... in the way I move my hands, how I pick at my skin; my speech, my posture, my everything. No wonder I am so alone. I am a living, breathing piece of rotten meat.

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You were everything to me. Everything good in the world, I saw you as a saint. Family. A role model. Someone I wanted to be. I loved you like a family, and I thought that was returned.

And maybe at some point you did. Oh, but to think I thought so highly of you until just DAYS ago. Without ever fucking knowing you thought so badly of me, even before now.

And sure, everyone has their moments where they get mad. Its human nature, everyone has emotions. I don't blame you for that. You're allowed to get mad, you're allowed to have emotions, duh. Obviously.

But ^.^, I never thought badly of you, I defended you, I fought for you, I cut people off for you, I vented to you, I cared so deeply for you, and I trusted you with my secrets and I trusted you with my feelings and every single part of me.

And I need time to process that unbridled fucking dedication and trust wasn't actually reciprocated.

It's not like I dislike you, the opposite. Oh I want so badly to forget I ever knew I was soooo annoying. I wish no one ever told me.

And I'd still never fucking say a word against you in public. I'd never say it in private and I'd never say it to your face. I don't even want to. I still trust you, and I still see you as a role model and I still have nothing but positive emotions towards you.

But I'm stupid and annoying and he was right, right?

Its always been that I care about people too much.

^-^

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i wish i wws smarter i just wish i was smart enough to stop doing dunb shit htat pisses everyone off

i just wanted tomake himleave my frineds alone and i wasnt eveb going to get with them imand im so tired and ijuztkeep fuckinf up

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oh hell no

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I miss Lee he was the only one who could handle me

#im too much for everyone else #not enough for him #i miss you i miss you i miss you #i miss you