fangirlingintellectual

[fangirlingintellectual]

It's not an ishman fanfic if shubman is not an absolute simp and ishan isn't always pining and without one of them not realising they're bisexual

[fangirlingintellectual]

some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.

[fangirlingintellectual]

Agle Sachin aur Sehwag

*Ashleel harkatein karte hue😌*

Not Youtubers making Ishman jokes now..I REPORT ISHMAN HAS INVADED THE NATION👽👽🤧🤧

for context watch slayy point's latest video.

#ishan kishan #shubhman gill

[fangirlingintellectual]

Yeh IPL season being an ISHMAN fan is an exercise in being positive.

MI aur GT dono ki halat tight Hai.

Yahan Shubhman pe captaincy ka pressure hai aur wahan Ishaan par comeback ka.

Kabhi kabhi is competitive country ki haalat dekh kar dil dahal jaata hai.

Ishaan ka dekh ke toh sabse darr lagta hai cause as Wicketkeeper-Batsman uska bohot competition hai. From Rishu to DK, Sanju, and Rahul.

Yeh season jaisa bhi jaaye, future secure rahe bas uska. His potential deserves a lot more.

U-19 captain hai yaar ek din India ka bhi captain banna hai Internation mein.

Chalo shaabaash.

Okay so am gonna talk bout shubman

Pehle to bande ko ek team de di jaati hai jisne do saal bhot khatarnaak perform kiya hai, to vo pressure+ captaincy ka vi rehta hi hai.

Jb ye news aa rhi thi mujhe lga rumour hoga kyuki gt mai hor vi ache players hai jo international level pai captain hai ,they could have let him gain some experience , usko thoda bhota to pta hi rehta, descision making waale mai rkh lete usey to kya pta agle saal vo acha kr ta no doubt go abhi vi kr rha hai but man he is learning in a hard way 🙂🙂

mere ko ye batana ki pichle do saal shub tha kya descision making mai gt ki ? Like tha to kuch to experience hai hi uske paas 😌😌

Aur fer ye chlta hi hai ki stadium mai chants start ho jaati hai, but banda jeet gya tha uss time. Kl wala vi match tha haath mai but nhi ho paya koi nhi next match to hai hi 🙂🙂🙂

Aur fer do match se chl vi nhi rha ye😔😔, koi nhi aage waale matches vi hai abhi to . Bhai itna postive kha se soch rhi hu mai .

Vo jis post pai ish ne comment nhi kiya vo dekh ke aisa lga na ki ye log bta rhe hai ki indono ke beech sb theek hai 💀 like vo to pta hi tha but assurance di hai 😌😌😌😌 iss se jyada kya chahiye. Aur fer aditi ki story vi dekh li iss krke aur chill hu kyuki there is beauty in privacy 💀💀

(⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)(⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)

#shubmangill #ishan kishan #indian cricket team

[fangirlingintellectual]

Goals are personal promises you make to yourself.

[fangirlingintellectual]

Ranjish Hi Sahi

ATTENTION

If you see this you are OBLIGATED to reblog w/ the song currently stuck in your head :)

[fangirlingintellectual]

[fangirlingintellectual]

[fangirlingintellectual]

still thinking about this youtube comment i screenshotted ages ago

[fangirlingintellectual]

I’m okay.

it’s getting bad again

[fangirlingintellectual]

me: *hanging out with friends* man, maybe living isn’t that bad lol me: *after hanging out with friends* anyways everyone hates me and i should die

[fangirlingintellectual]

You ever wake up someday and think

The "want-to-die" feels are really high on this one?

[fangirlingintellectual]

Remind yourself that you'll move out someday.

How to deal with how it affects you mentally living with parents that should have been divorced but aren't??

#kept me alive for the longest time

[fangirlingintellectual]

I healed when I realised the apology I wanted from that parent will never come.They do not see it from your eyes and even if they can,they will shut their eyes because it would mean they would have to admit making a mistake.Every time things get a little better,you assume this is it.They have passively realised how much they hurt you and them treating you better is the apology,and suddenly one day it switches off.You realise that every time they show the slightest bit of that affection you needed,you gaslight yourself into believing that they had it tougher and it’s you who exaggerated whatever happened.But it happens again and the tears stain the pillow and you think this time you know,you know not to go back.But it happens again and you go back once again.

-nipuna

[fangirlingintellectual]

They'll miss you

will anyone ever miss me or will they say "thank god "

[fangirlingintellectual]

You don't owe it to them to raise them.

Unfortunately tho, you will have to raise yourself because no one else will. (You probably already are) I want to say you're already doing a better job than any example set in front of you.

But one of the lessons that you'll learn when you go on the journey of raising yourself (let me spoil just this one for you:)

Your life is yours and yours alone. Others (your parents) might make you feel like you have no control over it, or put you in situations where you have NO idea how to take care of anything but it is yours. Your mistakes are your own. Your losses are your own. Everything is yours. Regardless of the why, regardless of the catalyst, what you do with yourself will be something that you will have to deal with forever.

Marr bhi gayi toh inka zyada kuch nahi bigdega. Par tumhare paas tum ek hi ho. Zindagi ek hi hai.

Uss zindagi ko jeene ka mauka dena bhi tumhari hi responsibility hai (kyunki jinki originally thi unke lakshan tumse zyada aur koi nahi janta hai) Bohot kuch Saha hai tumne. Bohot door aayi ho.

Apni kahani ka ant kisi aur ke diye hue zakhmon ke wajah se mat hone dena.

I'm very very proud of you. You've been very strong so far.

I love you.

what do you do after threatening your desi parents that you'll do something to yourself if they don't stop involving you in their fights, directly or indirectly then have a breakdown as soon as you shut your bedroom door because you can't believe that that's what you had to threaten YOUR PARENTS with for them to stop

#this is what i hope someone had told me when i was in your shoes #this is what i hope someone would have told me 6 hrs ago #my parents are literal kids too #make it better #just yourself #i know youve got it

[fangirlingintellectual]

Very beautifully written

"Why don't you spend time with us?" they say, "Keep your phone away at the table."

Parents say they want to talk — until it's about anything real.

They don't want to know about how their plans for your future make you feel.

They don't want to know your fears, hopes or dreams.

The things you're interested in — your favourite music, games and movies;

Or the things you've come to believe.

Sometimes it feels like parents don't want to get to know you as a person. They only see you in relation to themselves.

Or sometimes they do talk about music and games and movies, and it's even worse — because the conversations you want to have are serious.

And it's worse because it becomes very clear, that they don't want to have conversations that matter. That, god forbid, make them feel.

They want to avoid talking about all the times they yelled at you. No apology, no acknowledgement. Just glaze over those parts and pretend everything's normal. Neither guilt nor remorse.

And you're left wondering whether this thing you have a memory of actually happened, because everyone is acting like it didn't. And whether your anger is warranted, because everyone is acting like it isn't.

An unspoken decision: "Yes, we were harsh earlier, but we felt bad and are being nice now"

The implied demand: "...so be grateful,"

The undercurrent of a threat: "...or I'll get angry again."

And a push to move on: "Why do you bear grudges? Leave the past in the past."

All these little clues, that you learn to read in their body language and their eyes and their vibe.

And then they balk when you don't call them. Or jump at the chance to spend time with them — or even have a relationship.

It's weird, loving people you don't like. That you'd never choose of your own volition; that you'd never be friends had you met in the real world. People you're indebted to anyway, because they took care of you your whole life and changed your diapers and drove you to school, and what friend would ever do that?

Had they been overly abusive I would've cut them off without guilt; if I didn't know that despite it all, they really did love me, I wouldn't have cared about hurting their feelings.

Some people... you love them only because they are family. If they were a boyfriend, I would've broken up with them; if they were a spouse I would've divorced them. Alas, they are my parents, and I'm destined to love them. To give up a kidney for them if need be, but not any days out of my workweek.

I don't have these conversations with my family because I've come to realise that this is something they're not emotionally equipped to handle. Too much self-awareness would bring out memories not only of the mistakes they made with me, but also all the times adults in their childhood failed them; of all the ways they themselves were wronged; all the years they wasted because of choices they didn't know they had; and all the things they wish they'd done differently. So I understand; the flood of anger and regrets it brings to the surface must be draining.

But that also means that I'll distance myself from them, because for me, their misunderstood love is draining. And because this has to stop somewhere; someone has to start choosing differently — and I've decided it'll be me.