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Moseby has lost it…

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oh my god, please take 3 seconds out of your day to watch this.

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now i’m falling asleep and she’s calling a crab and he’s having a smoke and she’s kissing the crab

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harry potter rated by how often harry bathes

philosopher's stone: no baths/showers. mentions a cozy fire feeling like a hot bath so must have bathed at least once in his life. wipes out a troll in the bathroom so that's something. 2/10.

chamber of secrets: the dursleys let him out to use the bathroom twice a day, we can assume he cleanses occasionally here. spends most of the book in a bathroom doing many things except bathing. 5/10.

prisoner of azkaban: no baths. a filthy year for the young wizard. 0/10.

goblet of fire: one of the tents at the quidditch world cup has a birdbath. perhaps harry bathed in that but it isn't specified. has a bath! a bubble bath! an important occasion. 9/10.

order of the phoenix: possibly bathes at the dursleys. droplets of grawp's blood are said to shower upon him. probably the closest he came to bathing that year. 4/10.

half blood prince: no baths. poor ginny. 0/10.

deathly hallows: sits on the edge of a bath. probably doesn't know what it's for. 1/10.

#why

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I’ve had the same editor since 1967. Many times he has said to me over the years or asked me, Why would you use a semicolon instead of a colon? And many times over the years I have said to him things like: I will never speak to you again. Forever. Goodbye. That is it. Thank you very much. And I leave. Then I read the piece and I think of his suggestions. I send him a telegram that says, OK, so you’re right. So what? Don’t ever mention this to me again. If you do, I will never speak to you again.

Maya Angelou, interviewed in The Art of Fiction No. 119  (via soemily)

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