freckleddthoughts

[freckleddthoughts]

tea

Song of the Day: Because by Yung Heazy

so, i kind of disappeared again... but i bring good news!

i’m actually happy with my page for newspaper! my teacher said something the other day about how “everyone is going to want to read this” because my design is so meme-y. the headline is “Meme Madness” with faces from popular memes crossed out behind it. and obviously that’s going to catch the eyes of highschoolers. i’m very excited for it to be published!

ah!

on a sadder note, the headaches are still going strong. i texted my mom (she’s on a cruise right now) about it and she said she would call my gynecologist. my head just hurts so much every day. i honestly don’t know if it’s my eyes, hormones, stress, or a combination. but i’ve been trying to drink tea to help! most notably is honey lavender. that tastes + smells so good

on another sad note, tests are hard. i had an english test today and wow did i struggle. english is just so confusing for me, mainly because there isn’t always One Definitive answer. it can be multiple if you argue your way. i hate that. i have an AP Chem test tomorrow (and monday) and i’m kinda... scared for them. this unit wasn’t overwhelmingly hard, but it wasn’t overwhelmingly easy either. i just hope i get a 80% on the test

i know this is short, im sorry! my head just hurts so much right now and my laptop screen is not helping at all... 

#my post

[freckleddthoughts]

angry homework

Song of the Day: Panic Room by Au/Ra

i hate writing about myself for school. it took me at least a hour to come up with a topic for my culture essay. i can’t tell you how angry i was getting trying to come up with something to write about. thankfully, i managed to come up with something. it isn’t due until Friday, but i still finished it today. now i’ll just have more time to perfect it! 

speaking of homework making me angry, my AP Chem homework is nothing but a lil bitch. that’s right. i said it. AP Chem is a bitch and i’m struggling. it’s even on the simplest problems! like! am I just that dumb?!?!? i’m going to talk about it tomorrow morning with my teacher (hopefully). maybe she can give me some advice

newspaper is also been making me a bit angry. my story, when i first got it, seemed like it’d be an easy, fun write! i mean, c’mon, it’s about memes and the EU. haha nope. my teacher (and editor) want me to be so detailed and so dramatic on the story! my teacher even wants me to interview a first amendment lawyer! like! what??? i’m going to talk to him about... not.. doing that. maybe he’ll let me just make my own copyright quiz. i know another staff member who could help me..

y’know how yesterday i wrote about my headaches? yeah, i have another one right now. i think mixed with the rainy weather, my hormones, and stress, headaches are just going to have to be a thing i get used to. i bought lavender tea today to maybe help ease my stress and such. hopefully it works.

my eyes might even be the cause of my headaches... i have read that birth control can make your glasses’ prescription change!

last night, things with ⚽︎ were finally cleared up. he told me how he honestly felt and i was happy for it. i honestly thought i’d be sad, but i’m actually not. i knew from the start of this whole thing we weren’t going to date, but it was fun to go on dates! i kind of want to tell him i’m 100% down to go on little friendship outings still with him. i feel like we have more fun when we’re one-on-one compared to us in a group setting. maybe that’s just me over-analyzing.

god. if ⚽︎ ever found this, i think i’d die. not like i’ve written anything embarrassing about him, but i’d still die. 

speaking of friend outings, i planned one last night! i’ve really wanted to go to a local orchard in my town because it’s finally fall, so i put a couple friends in a group chat and asked! okay, maybe more than a couple. maybe like eight people. shhhh. most of them i’ve grown distant from, and i want to fix that. i miss being surrounded by friends, y’know? even if some of them are a little... fake.... but let’s not talk about that today. 

i kind of feel bad at the same time about the orchard “party” i’ve made. a couple weeks ago, me and ⚽︎ agreed we wanted to go together, and when i asked that group chat if they wanted to go, he said yes. but.. when i asked later on and dropped hints that i had no one to go with, that boy didn’t ask! but now i feel like i should ask him now! is that weird? probably.

i just hope things get worked out. with just everything in my life right now. not like things are crazy, i just want 24/7 peace.

#my post #⚽︎

[freckleddthoughts]

headaches and love

Song of the Day: I’m Just Your Problem by Ashe

Wow. After having this blog for ONE day, I went missing already. To be fair, I have some valid excuses. Okay, maybe not, but shush!

Excuse #1: I felt like I was dying. My new birth control (I started the shot) is giving me some killer headaches, or I think it is at least. i had to leave school early because of it! it was awful. all i could do was lay in darkness and try to sleep it off.

Excuse #2: my sister got married! i was pretty busy this weekend messing with the wedding. things went pretty good considering all the slip ups we had. i’m just happy she’s happy. her husband is absolutely amazing and i couldn’t have asked for a better guy to marry my sister.

Excuse #3: i’ve had school! this year has been a struggle so far, especially with my AP Chem class. i just can’t seem to retain any information! and i hate it! things usually come to me so easily, but not this year. i should probably get a Chem tutor and such, but that requires more effort. i’m lazy

so, yeah, i had some reasons to disappear.

things with ⚽︎ have not gotten better. but, on the bright side, i’ve gotten over the.. little phase i had with him. at this point, i don’t care if we date or not. it’s up to him. i think dating him would be fun. being just friends would be fun.

but at the same time: do i just want to date someone? do i really honest to god have a crush on ⚽︎? would i want to call him my boyfriend? do i just miss having someone to call mine?

the sad thing is, yes. yes to all of the above. im trying to tell myself not to think about it, because i don’t think we’ll date. i dont think he’ll make up his mind. i don’t think he’ll ask me. and i hate it. im so impatient.

but i also don’t want to pressure him. i dont wanna seem needy. FUCK. this is why i normally steer clear of this shit.

ugh.

why.

blah.

#my post #⚽︎

[freckleddthoughts]

let’s start this off right

Song of the Day: Tokyo Ghetto by Eve

so, you may or not be wondering, “why the f*** is she starting a blog? what’s the point?”. well, the simple answer is that i like to write. the complex answer is that it:

- helps me ease stress

- gives me a place to Go Crazy about whatever i want

- lets me explain my dumb, irrational thoughts

this isn’t the first time i’ve tried to start a blog. the first attempt was back in March of this year. it maybe got to 4 posts before i got too busy to write anymore! talk about pathetic! so, this time around, i’m going to things a bit differently. hopefully, you won’t hate it, but, eh, no one’s making you stay.

moving on from introduction/starter stuff, i hate writing,

ironic, right? writing “i hate writing”? i know, i’m very clever.

in reality, i don’t hate writing. i’m starting to hate the topic i was assigned for my school’s newspaper. the topic? the EU’s Article 13, aka the “Meme Ban”. boy, do people have that wrong! it’s not even banning memes! it’s just making social media platforms (YouTube, Twitter, Facebook) in charge of removing copyrighted content rather than the owner of the copyrighted material. no one f***ing said “IT BANS MEMES MEMES GONE HAHA SUCK IT”.

anyways, that’s my article’s topic. sounds fun right? writing about memes and copyright laws?

haha no.

my teacher won’t tell me what direction to take the article! he just keeps telling me a bunch of different things to put in! hopefully tomorrow he can be more helpful, but something tells me that won’t happen. the rough draft is due friday too! i got assigned the story yesterday! WHAT????

on the bright side, i interviewed three people today for the story, most notably ⚽︎ and ✎. 

⚽︎’s answers, if i’m being honest, were kind of not good interview answers, but i’m still thankful he let me interview him. i can’t help but feel like we’re growing distant a bit, but like hell am i going to tell him that. being honest with my feelings towards my (maybe) romantic interest? NAH. things have just been... i don’t know.. tense? since i asked him about feelings Saturday night. blah. this is why i normally stay away from relationships. (lmao, if he reads this, yeah i chose a soccer ball, you reffing maniac)

✎’s answers were really good! i’m happy i’ve become friends with her. she’s kind of the reason why i look forward to my TA class so much in all honesty. she makes things fun! and she kinda.. gives good advice, even if she is younger than me. ✎, if you find this, thanks <3

while we’re on the topic of friends, ☀︎ has been making me feel many different things. she goes around saying opposites to everyone and i just want to know the truth! what does she want?? can i even trust what she says?? why does she act so differently around me now?? is it because she forced me into her group of friends?? does she not like me around them?? it’s a bit too late for that now, considering me and ⚽︎. her birthday is tomorrow and i’m not sure if i wanna 100% celebrate with her. i mean, i will, but something tells me tomorrow morning at Starbucks, i’ll get anxious and stay quiet. that seems to be the usual lately.

i’ve realized i’ve made a lot of new things in my life recently. i started a witch blog because of my interest in witchcraft. i made a tiny witch altar in my room. i made this blog. i’ve made new friends. i’ve found tons of new songs. i got a new form of birth control.

lots of new.

but new is good. new washes away all the stagnant old energy. not that i don’t like the old. she just tends to get pretty boring pretty fast, y’know? i need 24/7 excitement in my life. old doesn’t do that. new does that for a week or so, then i get bored of it.

hopefully that doesn’t happen with this blog... oops

#my post #⚽︎ #✎ #☀︎