They/he | Sirion (is my name) | Hello Humans, I am a neurodivergent, Nonbinary, aroace, chaotic mess. | Welcome to my disaster! Pull up a chair, enjoy yourself
I want to talk about being aroallo for a little bit. Before I start, I want to make it abundently clear that there's nothing wrong with sex that doesn't involve emotional intimacy. There's nothing wrong with one-night-stands. There's nothing wrong with sex with strangers you're never gonna see again.
However, I guess I'm just feeling kind of bummed about how romantic love seems to be the only kind of love people are capable of associating with sex. Like either you're having no strings attached casual sex or you're having romantic sex and there's no inbetween which just isn't true for me. I lost my virginity to my best friend and it was deeply emotionally intimate and wonderful and I felt very close to them but it wasn't romantic. I'm aromantic. I care immensely about them but as a friend. The way I care about them affected the sex we had. It was emotional, it was personal, it was intimate. None of that is negated by the fact it wasn't romantic. I just wish this was talked about more idk.
Anyway, sorry if this was a bit rambling, I've just been thinking. Aroallos, you're incredible and awesome. Everybody else, go give your local aroallo £5
Only recently being recognized as a huge trauma itself, I’ve seen nothing on Tumblr being posted about glass children. And as a glass child myself, which is a part of the reason I’ve struggled severely with mental illness, especially in my early teen years, was from being a glass child. However, it’s still incredibly popular to view what we experience as invalid and that we should “appreciate we aren’t like them” (which is incredibly insulting to both parties and I hate hearing it). Idk if this will get any notes, but I wish someone told me what I went through is valid and a real thing and I hope maybe this will show one person the same:
Glass Child: siblings of a person with a disability. The word glass means people tend to see right through them and focus only on the person with the disability. 'Glass' is also used because the children appear strong, but in reality are not. These children have needs that are not being met.
The term was popularized and recognized in Alicia Maples’s “Recognizing Glass Children” TedTalk posted in December, 2010 in which she talks about her experience growing up with a severely Autistic brother.
It is important to acknowledge that the disabled sibling plays no role in the conditions and problems a glass child endures as they did not choose to have a disability. The conditions and problems are a product of bad parental management and being a victim of circumstances. As a child, not understanding this bigger pictures may sometimes cause a glass child to see their sibling as the problem, but it is important to stress the sibling has no part in it.
Examples of challenges glass children experience during childhood:
Severe emotional neglect from guardians
Severe pressure to be the “perfect” kid
Feeling as if you must help others before yourself
Strong anger of not having a “normal” family, but feeling shame for feeling anger.
Putting in extra effort to appear okay even when they aren’t
Taking on the tasks (both physical and or mental) that are reserved for parents
Feelings of hopelessness
Hyper-vigilance and anxiety
Feeling of being taken for granted
These experiences during childhood follow you into teenage years and adulthood.
Putting other’s needs before one’s own, even at their own expense
Lack of self identity or never developing their own personality
Hyper-vigilance to an inappropriate degree
Extreme sensitivity
Struggles with trust and or vocalizing feelings and needs
Difficulty in adjusting to new, unexpected situations
Avoidance of any form of conflict to the point where it has negative impacts on day to day life
Learn More:
Glass Child Syndrome And Symptoms
Glass children: The overlooked siblings of the people we treat.
What is a glass child?
How We Can All Help Glass Children
Growing Up a Glass Child
Glass Child Syndrome And Symptoms
Glass children: The lived experiences of siblings of people with a disability or chronic illness
Glass Children
At least from my experience, one of the biggest problems that follows me till this day is being extremely sensitive as to when I feel my feelings or presence is being invalidated. This is not completely my imagination however as the term “glass child” as of now has no place in the DSM-5, any dictionaries, and not even a Wikipedia page despite the years and years of studies and proof showing that the existence and damage of being a glass child is very real and a problem. I myself didn’t know about this term until a few months ago. And that was from TikTok of all places. I hope this makes at least one more person aware that we exist, we are valid, and we are not “the lucky one.” Both the disabled sibling and the glass child(s) deserve the recognition for enduring the hardships life threw at them. We both deserve it.
Please reblog and add your nationality in the tags along with what you answered! I'm very curious about this; and it's not to shame anybody, so don't be rude!
Welcome twitter users fleeing the absolute cesspool that twitter is going to become as Musk gets his way with his awful ideas! Things are better here, and hey, if you're an old user coming back, they've actually improved shit!
Here's a list of important notes for tumblr usage:
Don't censor words, particularly trigger warnings. Tumblr has a very functional blacklist (found in your settings) that can filter by post content and/or tags. But the word needs to actually be present for the filter to work. Censoring words like r*pe is actively harmful to people attempting to avoid those topics.
Use tags liberally, you have as many as you want, but don't tag unrelated shit. You'll get reported for spam really fast if you do.
Set an avatar and reblog things, otherwise you look like a bot.
You are not obligated to have your real name anywhere in your blog/bio/etc. Most people here use handles.
You can turn your ask box & anons on or off if you are experiencing any kind of harassment. You can also turn off replies on your posts, and turn off reblogs if you need to.
Tumblr has keyboard shortcuts on desktop. You can find them listed under the blog/account menu. Go learn them, they make life so much easier.
Reblog things. Seriously. Also set your dash in chronological order. You can maintain several blogs if need be, but reblogging things is normal, expected, and how you pass along stuff you enjoy.
The majority of people aren't reading your card/dni/blog bio before they reblog stuff. Posts get passed around and the OP often isn't the focal point of the post. Learn to live with it.
Fic writers: you have unlimited words, do not post fics as images.
Reblogs with comments/tags are encouraged. It's not like twitter's QRTs. The OP will see everything there. Know that before you comment.
You have a queue. This means you can set posts up ahead of time to run while you're busy. You can also completely ignore this and just spam your follows whenever you're online. Both are very commonplace
It's not weird to go through someone's blog and reblog old posts. That's actually very normal. If you add /chrono to the end of a tumblr page then you can view all the posts in chronological order to make this easier.
"Spam" liking and reblogging isn't a thing that is a problem. This is invented by people I do not understand. If someone claims this is a problem, they can learn how to turn off or manage their notifications.
The only form of promotional posts that tumblr has is "blaze". There is no ad targeting or any kind of invasions of privacy with blaze. You just get subjected to w/e someone wants to show you. If you want to give tumblr some money to help the company keep going and providing an alternative to twitter, it's not a bad way to do it. You can make people look at cat photos.
Also, we have fun colors here. Plus actual formatting ability. Use it!
People lie on here for fun. Don't accept everything you see at face value, check the reblogs/replies or google something if you're skeptical! Critical thinking is good!
Above all else, be chill, use your block button if you need to, and have fun.
Hot take, but if you see your baby struggle through five hours of homework and then you get pissy because they drag their feet about doing chores? You need to reevaluate.
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