imightstealyourkneecaps

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I love the old timey phrase "you forget yourself". bro that was so impolite like do you even know who you are rn

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mysterious, and surprising.... let the magic begin!

#gorgeous art #lyney #lynette #genshin impact #genshin fanart

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You know what? Fuck it.

The amount of notes that this post gets by the end of April is the amount of words I'll write for one of my books.

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Hey now, you’re an all star

listen to what I orchestrated

SoundCloud

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něco co naprosto miluju je popularita deskovek v česku. sejít se s random lidmi v kavárně a celé odpoledne hrát člověče nezlob se nebo cokoliv jiného. not a thing in my country at all zatímco tady naprosto seriózní dospěli lidé hrají hry o jednorožcích co prdí a o tom, koho má přejet tramvaj (ano to jsou reálně existující deskovky).

#deskovky moje milované!

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you wouldnt last an hour in the asylum where they raised me

#aww <3

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When you are alone and have a heart attack. What are you gonna do then?

Take a 2 minute break and read this:

Let's say it's 5:25 pm and you're driving home after an unusually hard day's work.

You are really tired and frustrated. All of a sudden your chest pains. They are starting to radiate in the arm and jaw. It feels like being stabbed in the chest and heart. You're only a few miles away from the nearest hospital or home.

Unfortunately you don't know if you can make it..

Maybe you've taken CPR training, but the person running the course hasn't told you how to help yourself.

How do you survive a heart attack when you're alone when it happens? A person who is feeling weak and whose heart is beating hard has only about 10 seconds before losing consciousness.

1. But you can help yourself by coughing repeatedly and very strongly! Deep breaths before every cough. Coughing should be repeated every second until you arrive at the hospital or until your heart starts to beat normally.

2. Deep breathing gives oxygen to your lungs and coughing movements boost the heart and blood circulation. Heart pressure also helps to restore a normal heartbeat. Here's how cardiac arrest victims can make it to the hospital for the right treatment

3. Cardiologists say if someone gets this message and passes it on to 10 people, we can expect to save at least one life.

4. FOR WOMEN: You should know that women have additional and different symptoms. Rarely have crushing chest pain or pain in the arms. Often have indigestion and tightness across the back at the bra line plus sudden fatigue.

#ohh never onew this

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You know what? Fuck it.

The amount of notes that this post gets by the end of April is the amount of words I'll write for one of my books.

#guys. you know what you need to do!!

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My attempt to translate Voltaire's The Divine Émilie into Czech because I just love it so much.

I don't think anyone who speaks Czech will actually see this, so you'll have to trust me that I tried my best to keep the rhymes.

#krásný překlad!! #umění

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why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?

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@autistictortoise zde žádost o povolení k vykonání práva k vyoknění pro soukromé občany, jelikož jsme civilizovaný národ

je to v němčině protože mi to tak přišlo vtipnější, a v českém úředním jazyku se tolik nevyznám, ale pošlu formát pokud to chcete někdo přeložit

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#defenestrace #deutsch #česká konfederace

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Dear friends,

I have decided to start a political party eqiuvalent of Monarchisté.cz, but the exact opposite.

*for the uninitiated Monarchisté.cz is the czech political party, whose goal is to reinstate the Habsburg family as a hereditary monarchy. This However, only for the area of the current Czech Republic, without any of the rest of the former empire or even Austria.

The goal my new party is to renew the Czech Confederation along its borders from the years 1620-1621.*

*the only year it existed

Thus reuniting the historical lands of the Czech crown (Bohemia, Moravia, Silesia, Lusatia/Lausitz/Łužica/Łužyca, and the Palatinate/Oberpfalz/Horní Falc) as Confederal Counties (CCs) and equal partners within a mutually beneficial confederation.

The following is the Party Program I've come up with so far:

• Confederation entails a unified financial system; military; and diplomatic and trade relations, as well as intercompatible educational systems and digitalized beurocracies within each CC.

• The Czech Confederation would take the place of the current Czech Republic on the international stage (its places in the EU and V4 for example).

• Executive power in the Czech Confederation would remain in the hands of a Primeminister and his cabinet. Each CC, having its own political system, would still be forced to call whoever held executive power within it a fun feudal title, like Count or Margrave, instead of Head Minister and such.

• Internationally the Czech Confederation would be represented by a "Winter King", elected by the Counts/Margraves/etc. of each CC. This King, in leau of tradition of the first Winter King, would be forced to abdicate his throne every November. Immediately voting him back into office would be permissable, if the heads of the CCs wished so. (Yes, this is exactly the same role as the curent czech President but with a swaggier title and more ceremony).

• In order to achieve one of the goals of the first Czech Confederation, i.e. prevent Bohemian (bzw. Czech) hegemony within the confederation, while still allowing Prague to be its capital, Prague residents will be stripped of all voting rights, but for the ones in local elections. The only way around this will be for Prague residents to marry into out of Prague families, thus gaining perspective on the world and a non-prague registration allowing them to vote.

• No one (1) official language. All official languages recognized by the CCs will be official languages of the state. This will not only create a massive new translating apparatus and jobs, but also allow for each CC to foster local languages in a new way. The consequences of this:

- i guess moravian is a language now

- since the Silesias currently under the rule of the CZ and of Poland would be united into one CC, it will be left up to them fight about a unified writing system or wtf else they will want to do.

- more than 1 (one) Sorbian gymnasium

- the good people of the Palatinate won't be forced to speak Hochdeutsch anymore. I'm sure this will make them support anexation. Unfortunately, if successful, this might make the rest of current Bavaria so jealous, that they also separate from Germany. If events come to pass in this order, it is inevitable that Bavaria would want to reannex the Palatinate, which could lead to a war lasting generations or to the end of a fun experiment, we shall see.

• I refuse to make Protestantism the official state religion, like the OG Czech Confederation did. However, I 100% will knock down the Mariánský sloup/Mariensäule* on Old Town Square in Prague again.

*built in the 1650s to mark the victory of the Habsburgs and Catholicism over the Czech lands; knocked down in 1918 after the declaration of the independent Czechoslovak state by a very funnily orchestrated crowd, to symbolize freedom from the Habsburgs; rebuilt in 2022 after 30 years of lobbying by the Catholic church as part of a package for the "Revitalisation of the Old Town Square".

I do plan on leaving the pedestal there this time though, because it really is the best place to sit in that entire area.

• INFRASTRUCTURE:

This kind of confederation would require a massive expansion of long distance public transport, and possibly one that actually works. Swiftly realised impactful projects being the key to the success of new states, I plan two key projects to boost my popularity through their quick completion.

Firstly, we shall expand the Brno Airport. Making it the new main Airport of the Czech Confederation, it shall be renamed to Brno Expanded Runway (BER) to honor its humble beginings.

The second required infrastructure project is the long needed tunnel under the Giant Mountains/Krkonoše/Karkonosze/Riesengebirge to connect Bohemia, Lusatia and Silesia. Since the technology and design of tunnels such as these, are based on those of the Mont Blanc tunnel, I propose to czechify a callback to its origins by calling this project Tunel Blanka. I'm sure the speed of the completion of these infrastructure projects will boost the legitimacy of my new state :)

On a more strategic note, I think I have the support of most current residents of the Czech Republic outside of Prague, and can especially mobilize the conservative vote on my no-votes-for-praguers platform. I am similarly convinced I have the support of all sorbians as well as all the silesian members of the polish facebook group "Wypowiedzmy wojnę Czechom i im się poddajmy" (Let's declare war on the czechs and then surrender to them). I am only unsure on the Pfälzer, because they may feel too much loyalty to bavaria at this point.

I also need to infiltrate a german political party, in order to get them to support my plans without knowing, that that's what they're actually doing. This is in order for Germany not to get mad about the whole anexing parts of it part. My roommate said this would be easiest to do with the SPD.

#máte můj hlas vážení #česká konfederace #czech #česky #čumblr

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girl typing a very specific question into google search bar, scrunching her face as she takes time to make sure she hasn't made any spelling errors, hitting enter, shaking her head as google only presents her with unhelpful websites that don't answer her query at all, moving her cursor back to the search bar and clicking on it so she can carefully write 'reddit' at the end, hitting enter again, sighing with relief as she finds a link to a reddit post asking the exact question she needed answered posted in a subreddit for a very niche topic, finally moving her cursor to click on the link, wondering why she didn't go straight to the subreddit earlier, only to be met with a deleted comment with a reply from the OP stating 'that was very helpful, thanks', sighing with frustration as she moves her cursor back to the search bar so she can copy the link and paste it into the wayback machine,

#for reference #oh thats cool

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…….thinking about this………..always thinking about this…..

#poetry

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The plot structures of movies need to start taking more cues from classic opera. Open with fucker in a hat who directly addresses the audience and explains what's going on in a way that raises far more questions than it answers, then immediately drop the viewer into the middle of a shouting argument between three of the weirdest people you can possibly imagine.

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Something I do really love about The Tumblr Experience™️ is that you get everything. The whole blog, in order, not by popularity or (usually) tailored to fit an audience.

I followed this person for one thing, but this is a really gorgeous picture of a bird. A gifset of a movie I never would have seen. A poem about brothers or frogs or ribbon or love.

It's odd but it's meditative, almost. I think it's part of why mutuals, especially ones we don't really talk to, are such a specific phenomenon. I've never spoken to you, you stopped talking about the thing I followed you for forever ago, I don't even remember what it was, but I like seeing you there, still reblogging gifsets of 1990s cult classics and parasocially blogging about Bob Dylan.

#hellsite #<33