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                       *    MAMA, WE ALL GO TO HELL!

an indie ROMA HOITO from TOKYO GHOUL loved by zatan

#IM ON MY PHONE BUT #ZATAN…

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‘  i guess i was so busy i forgot about my own birthday...  ‘

#IM SO UPSET I MISSED HER BIRTHDAY #IT WAS THE FIRST #* in character.

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when an rp from three years ago still lives in ur head rent free...

#it was only 1 reply in and three years ago but #i still think abt it all the time #* out .

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the-ghoul-remains​.

KANEKI KNEW SHE WAS TRYING TO BE COMFORTING, giving him the space and opportunity he needed to bring up just about anything or even ramble about something that didn’t even matter… yet he felt A N Y T H I N G but. His eyes remained locked on hers, like deer in headlights as Touka’s lips curved ever so slightly into a smile. He couldn’t return the gesture even if he wanted, feeling rigid and stiff, while trembling all the same.

IT WAS MOST VISIBLE IN HIS WRISTS which swiveled and twitched, the gloved, clawed fingers underneath flailing wildly between the gap in his thighs. He would do that often back in that C H A I R , for the rest of his body was tense with anticipation of inevitable pain to come as his toes were snipped off one by one. The image flashed in his head, of the monstrosity that he’d become, towering a man twice his size and three times his weight and devouring every last bit of his sword and shield until he was a D E F E N S E L E S S , weeping mess.

THE BLACK-HAIRED KANEKI WOULD NEVER DO THAT, he’d simply not have the stomach for such feats. And raising his hand on Touka’s own brother just an hour later - no… He would never forgive himself, he would N E V E R go through with such a plan, let alone think of it. Yet the white-haired half-ghoul that sat and shook in place had no regrets.

ONLY LAMENTS. Laments of a rusty heart. One that was handed over many times only to be destroyed and shattered time after time, the blood no more than orange and green dust.

GRAY EYES LOWERED DOWN, correcting themselves on her smile. Touka would get none in return, not right now. Not Y E T . Not until he had himself in full control and got a grip at reality to put his mask back on.

“I feel like I’m going to be taken back inside again.” He finally said, after yet another long silence. She said it would be fine if she didn’t understand, yet he felt it awkward to simply talk about it. However he persisted, for there was no one else to ever bring it up to - and if his feelings held any water within them, he wouldn’t stay long enough to have this chance again. “The others aren’t battling to drag me back, but I hear him. H I M , a one-eyed ghoul that perks his head and responds when the others call me “ K I N G “ . I… I cannot A C T U A L L Y see him like the rest but I C A N feel his claws. His fingertips. They’re lightly digging into my black tattered shirt. I think he’s going to rip me away like the previous King. Like Arima-san.”

if it wasn’t clear to anyone, it certainly was to her-- she hadn’t the best idea of exactly how to be a very comforting figure. but to walk away from him didn’t feel right-- how he would sit alone. hands that twitched and a near lifeless gaze, the silence he sat in to the world around him. yet, it wasn’t quiet for him inside, was it? the processing of going through every single thing and every moment that he endured. how much did it cloud his head?

every movement he made, the f o c u s he held on her-- the contrast to her faint gaze. only meeting his in fleeting moments as her gaze wandered more idly. a n y t h i n g to take the heat off him-- to not push too hard. to make him feel required to tell her what he was not ready to, no matter how much she wanted him to.

but there truly wasn’t anything she wasn’t ready to hear. the most vile & disgusting details of what he held on to. no matter what. there was nothing he could tell her  that it would make her turn away from him. what he did, what he’s endured, what runs through his head... it wouldn’t make her tuck her tail and run away. the thought calling him a monster and a terrible person, it would never find its place inside her. but even she knew--

that its easier to deal with than kindness

turning her head, she’d focus on him as the words began to come out. vague and unclear yet, they said a lot. a concept so foreign to her own mind, yet it painted something that ran through his mind.

‘ are you afraid of him? ‘

‘ or are you afraid of what will happen? ‘

#* in character. #theghoulremains

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WHAT ROMANCE TROPE ARE YOU?

friends to lovers

you’ve definitely had a crush on your best friend at some point in your life and it either went horribly wrong or extremely well. you like the idea of love when there is mutual pining and just a deep understanding of one another. being able to fall into the romantic things easily without the annoyingly awkward talking stage because you already know everything about them and vice versa. you might have a fear of rejection hence why you live vicariously through fictional relationships in hopes that one day that might be you. newsflash friend, you actually have to put yourself out there and stop waiting for love to magically fall into your lap

#just got tagged in this so im reblogging this :hehe: #it been done

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the-ghoul-remains​.

@lapined​

“ IT DOESN’T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH TRUST. YOU DON’T HAVE TO TELL ME. BUT I’LL LISTEN, IF YOU DO. ”

IT DOESN’T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH TRUST? Then what did it have to do with, exactly? Listening to him, telling to her… These were all actions that requires some form of trust, some form of vulnerability. To let someone this close to you, allowing them to peer into -

INTO WHAT, EXACTLY? It’s not like he had anything in that hole in his chest, where his old self used to be. Now tucked away in the depths of that abandoned mall, gathering dust in layers where his new self couldn’t have reached him. Kaneki was permanently changed - so much so he was an entirely new person with his own wants, needs, and don’ts. He wasn’t the young man Touka had met, but he also W A S , at the very same time.

WHAT WAS HE EVEN SUPPOSED TO SAY? It didn’t feel right, it didn’t feel S A F E , letting Touka near that part of him, the part that was confused and hurt, feeling unsafe and all alone. He felt like everyone had noticed just how F U C K E D   U P he’s become, how different he was. The easy solution would be to tap to his instincts and play pretend again, with memories of how he used to act when he still had his black hair - when he still worked at the A N T E I K U . But it felt fake, it felt wrong. It W A S N ‘ T him, he’s never worked there and never W I L L , for the placed his previous self called “ H O M E “ was nothing but ashes for years now.

BUT WHAT ELSE THERE WAS TO HIM NOW? All he’s ever done was fight and work himself to near-literal D E A T H , a futile attempt to make himself needed and loved like he always wished himself to be. Like his P R E V I O U S self wished himself to be. If he would open up and let Touka in… wouldn’t that make H I M the one that needs somebody else and gets protected? S A V E D ? This wouldn’t do. This wouldn’t do A T   A L L .

THIS WAS SIMPLY NOT IN HIS… “ C H A R A C T E R “ . So he stared back at Touka, shoulders tense, toes pointing at the nearest exit as if he was ready to R U N   F O R   H I S   L I F E . His eyes were beady and large, yet dead at the very same time. The lids under and over his them a bright shade of pink with dark circles to accompany them, slightly sunken in their sockets. It was true that he wasn’t as rigid and corpse-like as the Black Reaper, but he was broken in a D I F F E R E N T way.

A GLOVED HAND CAME UP, patting at his right temple a few times. Nothing came out of course, for the centipede he heard in his head was lurking in the darker corners of his mind. Kaneki could swear that sometimes it was really inside of him still, trying to eat him from the inside out, sometimes literally and sometimes by whispering obscenities into his ear. Lately… it picked up the phrase “ Y O U   K I L L E D   Y O U R   F A T H E R   A G A I N ! “

“For some reason I feel like you’ve a specific topic in mind.” He managed to finally say after having stared at her for a few long, A G O N I Z I N G minutes. Kaneki was damned if he was actually going to talk about his problems though, for it was his duty to nurture and be there for those who he wished for him to need his services, no matter how obscure. Someone needy and B I T C H Y would N E V E R be loved.

HE REALLY WAS TURNING INTO HIS MOTHER. He would likely end up like her too, miserable and desperate for someone to be there for him as he draws his final breath.

the passage of time-- it continued onward as the world changed. she was no stranger to this change. yet, never could it compare to the man sitting beside her now. the awkward, scrawny book worm of a guy who peered behind the security of the pages to spare a glance at the thing that would ruin his life. how soft hearted and so blissfully unaware he was of how truly cruel the world was going to be.

and how all she could do, was watch. unable to find aid him as the world continued to kick him around. how the world had it out for him and all it’s issues were speared right through him. how little there was she, or anyone could truly do to stop it all. how the pain changed him. new lives were formed in the same body, just as they would die as another took their place. yet they would live on in his head-- how much each changed him.

yet, there was still so little she knew. so much blank spacing between what became of him. who he was before that fateful day-- she hadn’t even the slightest idea. who he was after, who he would become, and who he was now...

just what ran through his mind?

her eyes would only give him a small look over. taking in the smallest details with just her single glance. how her memories would picture him versus what she saw now-- he wasn’t the same naive black haired weakling, yet, the person he was... it never truly left, did it?

a specific topic?

‘ no, not really. quite honestly, you could tell me anything and i’d listen. ‘

in her mind, she could’ve laughed at her statement. the memories she held of herself-- how they so vaguely aligned with the person inside herself. how much her younger self would hate the soft hearted person sitting here. yet, she knew where her change came from. how much she’d have wanted to deny the matter, how stupid and childish it felt to admit.

he was the reason to change.

after a pause, there was a small smile. to defuse the silence. to try and keep the momentum. as her finger rose to tap along her jaw, letting herself pretend to think deeper.

‘ i can’t say i’d understand if you explained some kinda book lore to me, but i guess if you want to talk about it-- i’d listen to that? ‘

#too tired to format this #so ur having it raw #hehe....... #* in character. #theghoulremains

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@woerended​ sent;;

🧥  (  to warm your muse by wrapping them in a coat / blanket  )

truly speaking, she hadn’t noticed the cold chill that ran down her spine. the cool breeze that swept through following the rain. the air cooled from the earlier humidity of the evening. but it seemed as though he took more notice-- taking her by surprise as the weight and warmth from the jacket he wore was placed onto her shoulders. it was inviting and relaxing to take in the warmth as it dawned on her that her body was chilled-- yet she’d shake her head, attempting to offer the jacket back.

‘ don’t you need this though? ‘

#* in character. #woerended

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misc action memes

the one sending in the prompt is the one comitting the action . [ add * for role reversal ! ]

🤚 - to offer your muse a hand in dance . 🤕 - to dress your muse’s wound . 🎀 - to braid / brush your muse’s hair . 🗡️ - to point a weapon at your muse . 👑 - to bow down before your muse . ☀️ - to kiss your muse’s hand . 🧋 - to offer your muse a drink . 💎 - to try to steal something from your muse . 🚬 - to light your muse’s cigarette . 🙄 - for my muse to roll their eyes at yours . 💐- to gift a bouquet of flowers . 😴 - to fall asleep on your muse . 🧥 - to warm your muse by wrapping them in a coat / blanket . 🌻 - for my muse to suddenly hold your muse’s hand . ❗️ - for my muse to hold your muse’s chin as a way of getting attention . 🔔  - for my muse to wake yours from a nightmare . 🎁 - for my muse to cup your muse’s face with their hands . ⭐️ - for my muse to stargaze with yours . 💍 - for my muse to tie a piece of jewelry around your muse’s neck or wrist . ❤️ - for my muse to kiss yours on the forehead . 👋 - for my muse to tug at your muse’s sleeve for attention . 🥱 - for my muse to yawn loudly . 🌸 - to place a flower crown on your muse’s head . 🦁 - to snarl / growl at your muse . 🤝 - for my muse to reach out their hand for a handshake . 💥 - to push your muse aside . 🖕 - for my muse to flash their middle finger at your muse . 🌹 - for my muse to blush . 🌼 - to give your muse a piggyback . 🌾 - for my muse to catch yours from falling / fainting . 🟠 - for my muse to pace back and forth . 🤺 - to challenge your muse to a sparring match . 🩹 - to trace your muse’s scars . 👁 - to glare at your muse . ✨ - for your muse to catch mine shirtless . 🎵 - for my muse to catch yours singing in secret . 💧 - for my muse to wipe away your muse’s tears . 🧽 - to wipe / clean blood off your muse . 😢 - for my muse to be caught crying . 💪 - for my muse to flex their muscles . ✊ - for my muse to hit yours . 😶‍🌫️ - to be caught hiding from something . 🧍 - to block your muse’s path . 🌡 - to check your muse’s temperature . 🪦 - to see yours by a grave . 🚶 - to go on a long walk together . ⚡ - to take shelter from a storm together . 👀 - to be caught staring at your muse . 🪴 - for your muse to lean on my muse for support . 🧨 - to pin your muse against the wall . ⚔️ - to fight against enemies together . 🪞 - to catch my muse trying to compose themselves in front of a mirror . 🤫 - for my muse to place a finger to their lips, shushing your muse . 👞 - for my muse to help yours get dressed . 🤗 - to hug your muse . 🩸 - to approach your muse soaked in blood . 🛡️ - for my muse to protect yours from harm . ☃️ - to build a snowman together .

#* inbox .

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WHAT FORM OF LOVE DO YOU EMBODY?

love as a choice

[ love is beautiful because it's built deliberately ] when casey mcquinston wrote "that's the choice. i love him, with all that, because of all that, on purpose. i love him on purpose" and when jenny slate tweeted "i just want someone to grab my little face and scream on purpose, on purpose i am going to care about you" and when jodi picoult wrote "after fifteen years, love isn't just a feeling. it's a choice" and when the good place said "if soulmates do exist, they're not found they're made"

#* musings.

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WHAT ROMANCE TROPE ARE YOU?

friends to lovers

you've definitely had a crush on your best friend at some point in your life and it either went horribly wrong or extremely well. you like the idea of love when there is mutual pining and just a deep understanding of one another. being able to fall into the romantic things easily without the annoyingly awkward talking stage because you already know everything about them and vice versa. you might have a fear of rejection hence why you live vicariously through fictional relationships in hopes that one day that might be you. newsflash friend, you actually have to put yourself out there and stop waiting for love to magically fall into your lap

#i. #* musings.

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𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐘 𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒?

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑.     jaw clenching.   hands balling into fists.   teeth grinding.   yelling.   going non verbal.   stuttering speech.   rushed speech.   slow concise speech.   rambling.   quiet.   arms crossing.   shaking head.   tearing up.   animated.   expressionless.   projects.   internalizes.   vents.   withdraws.   passive aggressive.   direct.   physical outbursts.   verbal outbursts.   gesticulating.   baring teeth.

𝐉𝐎𝐘.     easy smiles.   fighting back grins.   suppressed laughter.  loud laughter.   giggles.   chuckling.   smirks.   whole body laughs.   covers mouth when laughing / giggling.   throws head back when laughing.   slaps leg.   touches people around him when laughing.   looks down when laughing.   looks for eye contact when laughing.   sparkling eyes.   bubbly happiness.  quiet subtle happiness.   obnoxious happiness.   wants to spread joy.   quietly savors joy.

𝐒𝐀𝐃𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒.     crying.   bottling it up.   seeks distractions.   wallows.   meditates and processes.   avoidance.  seeks out comfort.   withdraws.   talks it out.   internalizes it.   sad smiles.  depression naps.   uses alcohol.   uses drugs.  seeks out sources of joy.   fidgets with sentimental item.   sits in silence.   broods.   gets moody.   wants someone to share the misery.   tries to hide negative emotions.   nurtures others to make themselves feel better.

𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 / 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐌𝐄.     blushing.   looking away.   rubbing at back of head.   covering face.   laughing nervously.  laughs it off.   overthinks.   lets it go.   self deprecating humor.   deflects.   gets irritated.   smiles.   withdraws.   crossing arms over stomach.   crossing arms over chest.   hands in pockets.   shoulders sinking.   shrugs.   falling into silence until comfortable again.  talking a lot to compensate.

𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐋𝐓.     avoiding eye contact.   shoulders sinking low.   head hanging down.   crying.   chest aches.  lashes out.   internalizes.   apologizes.  deflects.   communicates.   withdraws.   grand gestures for forgiveness.   accepts fault easily.   punishes themselves.   martyrdom.   victim complex.   guilt complex.  healthy conscience.   internalizes even after forgiveness.  seeking redemption.   moves on easily.   denial.   lack of guilt / conscience.   sorry they got caught more than caused harm.   can’t handle knowing they hurt others.

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐑 / 𝐀𝐍𝐗𝐈𝐄𝐓𝐘.     trembling.   crying.  sarcasm / sass to cope.   rambles.   goes silent.   gets angry.   fidgeting.   clenching jaw.   picking at nails.   chewing at lip.   pulling at clothes.   adjusting jewelry / clothing.   swallowing thickly.   eyes widening.   over-reacts.   under-reacts.   calm.   logical.   panic.   irrational.   overthinks.   carefully analyzes.   talks to themselves.   breathing exercises.   fight.   withdraw.   fawn.

TAGGED BY: @the-ghoul-remains​

TAGGING: no

#cheater u tagged me twice!!! #* out . #* musings.

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touka isn’t exclusively submissive, but she is indeed breedable, thx you.

#nsfw #suggestive #* out .

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i feel like what i might do is pick one ( 1 ) focus muse for a blog and put the others i wanna do on a multi but i cant decide who to focus on........

#im torn between like these 4: Gorou Hu tao Xiao Ganyu #Gorou and Ganyu are like high up there but.............. #* out .

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I LOVE TOUKA SM

#no one understands!!!!! #* out .

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minuseven​:

whats stronger???? all the ghouls in TG or @lapined‘s touka’s love for kaneki’s thighs

#WYM DONT LIE!! #* out .

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still cant decide who i’d write from genshin cause there is too many i would

#* out .

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𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐌𝐄 𝐆𝐎 👀.

okay so i got like, three books delivered this week, and in anticipation i reread another book that i had, and lads, let me tell ye, it was like quicksand. so now i have a list, some from my head, many from my wonderful friends’ heads, of prompts that basically made us all very soft or very “pleasantly scandalized rich lady from the sixties who just found out a juicy bit of goss about the new neighbor”. i hope ye like them! (DO NOT ADD TO THE LIST. I WILL MAKE A PART TWO. AND THREE. AND FOUR. MANY MANY PARTS. EVENTUALLY. )

[ HAIR ]:          sender slowly reaches out to catch a loose strand of the receiver’s hair and tuck it gently and securely back behind their ear, letting their touch linger afterwards. (if the receiver has short hair, then the sender reaches out and gently runs their fingers through their hair to smooth it back.)

[ CLOSE ]:          while standing remarkably close to one another, the sender is unable to stop themselves from running their gaze across the receiver’s body, lingering for a moment on their lips, before returning to initiate prolonged, intense eye contact.

[ CHIN ]:          as they stand close to one another, the sender hooks a finger and tenderly lifts the receiver’s chin, tilting it up so that they can look at one another, and running a thumb across their skin lightly.

[ THUMB ]:          while cupping the receiver’s cheek in their hand, the sender slowly glides their thumb across their cheekbone in a tender, sweeping caress.

[ WOUND ]:          upon noticing a recent injury on the receiver’s person, the sender carefully moves closer, running a thumb (or hand) across the wound in a gentle, troubled manner.

[ INHALE ]:          while standing in very close quarters to the receiver, the sender shakily inhales with desire/anticipation as they realize how intimately close they are to one another.

[ DANCE ]:          when alone together (e.g. the bedroom, the kitchen, literally anywhere once they’re alone) the sender takes the receiver’s hand, and pulls them into a graceful yet intimate dance as a spontaneous act.

[ BARE ]:          as they get undressed, the sender gently places a soft, tender kiss against the receiver’s bare shoulder.

[ SCAR ]:          noticing a scar on the receiver’s skin, the sender tentatively stops them from covering it up, and rests a gentle, soft kiss over it.

[ FOREHEAD ]:          placing a hand on the back of the receiver’s neck, the sender guides them close and rests their foreheads together.

[ PALM ]:          taking the receiver’s hand, the sender brings it to their mouth, and places a tender kiss against the receiver’s palm.

[ LINGER ]:          taking the receiver’s hand, the sender lifts it to their lips, and gently kisses their knuckles, lingering for a moment before withdrawing.

[ BEHIND ]:         upon entering the same room as the receiver, the sender steps behind them, and winds their arms around the receiver’s waist, drawing them close against them.

[ WAIT ]:          realizing the receiver is about to leave the room, the sender hastily reaches out and catches their wrist, preventing them from continuing their departure.

[ ARM ]:          after holding their hand, the sender releases the receiver, but slowly glides their hand up the full length of their arm, lingering on the upper arm, then the shoulder, then resting their touch against the side of their neck.

[ HOLD ]:          while close to the receiver, the sender wordlessly takes a hold of their hand, for no other purpose than to be holding it.

[ PLAY ]:          while sitting together, the sender absently lifts the receiver’s hand, idly running their fingertips across the lines of their palms, mapping out every inch of their hand with slow, lazy touches.

[ GUIDE ]:          in the process of guiding the receiver through a crowded place, the sender’s hand protectively grazes against the small of their back

[ TOUCH ]:          while touching the receiver’s waist, the sender’s hand briefly dips beneath the hem of their shirt, skimming briefly across the bare skin of their waist.

[ CUP ]:           bringing both hands up to cup the receiver’s face, the sender draws them in closer to them in order to get a better look at their face.

[ TUG ]:          the sender tugs the receiver close against them by resting a hand against the small of their back, pulling them flush against their body.

[ HUSH ]:          while standing close to one another and hiding from pursuers, the sender reaches up and places a finger against the receiver’s lips to prevent them from speaking and revealing their location.

#* inbox .