maybepaolo

[maybepaolo]

My Local Gas Station

[maybepaolo]

Unmute this and turn up the volume

#video

[maybepaolo]

stop it youre SCARING him!!

#video

[maybepaolo]

cronch

#video

[maybepaolo]

i let the furby skins soak in fabric softener after i washed them and my sis found them and sent me:

and i have never laughed so hard x’D

[maybepaolo]

do you ever feel as though you ghost-made a video?

#video

[maybepaolo]

[maybepaolo]

new four temperaments are clown, 80s, cowboy, and goth.

[maybepaolo]

Toucans are pretty weird, right?

I mean look at them, they’re all fucking beak.

But they get weirder.

Have you ever seen a toucan skull?

I MEAN LOOK AT THIS THING THEIR BEAK IS TALLER THAN THEIR ENTIRE FUCKING SKULL

[maybepaolo]

[maybepaolo]

yall are talking about Lorde and Hozier being forest dwellers but you’re forgetting the mother and good witch of the forest Florence Welch smh

[maybepaolo]

Me, when I buy 24 roombas and an amazon alexa

Me: Alexa, unleash the roombas

*24 roombas emerge slowly from under my bed, consuming everything in their path*

[maybepaolo]

all boys are demons but i want one to love me

[maybepaolo]

0 hesitation

[maybepaolo]

Tsuchinoko

Image obtained from The Cryptid Chronicles.

[It isn’t often that the world of yokai and the world of cryptids overlap, but this is one of those instances. Although there isn’t a lot of evidence suggesting the tsuchinoko is anything but a misidentified snake with a full belly, it is a beloved critter in many parts of Japan (and has a Pokemon based on it in the form of Dunsparce).]

Tsuchinoko This snake is the length of a man’s arm and twice as thick. Unlike most snakes, it has a short, discrete tail much thinner than its body. Its head is broad and triangular, and bears an incongruously wry facial expression.

Considered to be mythical by many, the elusive snake-like creatures known as tsuchinoko are intelligent predators with a mischievous streak. Their diet consists of small mammals, birds and other reptiles, but they have a pronounced fondness for alcohol. Many of their encounters with humanoids are in order to obtain such a beverage, which they accomplish using lies, threats or empty promises. Tsuchinoko are consummate liars and enjoy sending other creatures on wild goose chases based on their empty words.

Tsuchinoko are exceedingly rare; a single forest may only be home to one of these creatures. They are good parents, raising their young together until they mature, then splitting up as their children find territories of their own. Tsuchinoko keep little treasure, although they may treasure a prized bauble or two as a keepsake of a particularly impressive con.

Unlike other snakes, tsuchinoko do not slither—rather, they crawl in inchworm fashion with startling speed. This strength allows them to launch themselves fully a yard into the air when threatened, sending them hurtling towards enemies with a mouth full of tiny, venomous teeth. When a tsuchinoko cannot win a battle, it flees, gripping its tail in its teeth and rolling to safety.

Keep reading

[maybepaolo]

they’re talking to each other omg (‘:

#video

[maybepaolo]